Date: Sat, 20 Jan 2001 10:28:08 +0100 From: Lange Subject: betrayed love - chapter three Hey ... I thought I should maybe include some kind of disclaimer or something ... umm, don't read this if: ~you are younger than 18 ~you are homophobic or you just generally don't like this sort of stories ~this is forbidden where you live = that means, read if you're sure you can risk it. thanks to William Watts for editing this ... I think the story would look not too good if he didn't do it ... not that I'm convinced of my writing ability. :) thanks to Silvia for 'helping' me with the story line. ahh yeah, my homepage is http://home.t-online.de/home/lange.ruegen go there if you're interested in other stuff I write. so ... I hope nobody is offended by this chapter and you can enjoy it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~ chapter three - betrayed Tommy walked firmly over to where Jason stood, laid his hand on Jason's shoulder, spun him around, and stared at him hard. "Who the fuck do you think you are? Playing all friendly with me and in truth you only wanted to get in my pants. I don't believe it. My best friend is one of these fags I've tried to erase from here, for a few years now. How can you even *think* I'd still like to be friends with you, you sissy. Get the fuck out of my sight and don't even dare talk or even look at me again, or I'll beat the shit out of you. Understand?" "Tom? Are you ... what's with you ... I ..." "Do you really want me to beat you up? Don't think I'll ever be this generous again. If you cross my sight another time you'll have to pay for it, so leave now, before I decide otherwise." "Tom?" Jason didn't understand that Tommy did not want him around, as he still looked desperately and pleadingly at him. When Jason noticed no reaction, he turned around and walked out of the room. Despitehis harsh words, Tommy could not deny feeling a little guilty for rejecting Jason like that, but he surely did not regret his decision. In his eyes Jason was indeed some sissy, thinking about it now. He'd always hung around with him and he obviously didn't have any other friends besides Tommy and he was Tommy's only friend. Well, he didn't care about that anyway. Jason was some fag and thus did not exist for him anymore. He was also not worth thinking about either. He waited a little while longer, until he could be sure that Jason had left the building, then he also left the room. He risked one quick look into the teachers' room and saw Mrs. Lewis still correcting some papers and preparing tomorrow's classes. He left the school and stopped for a little bit, to again think about what had happened in these last minutes. His best friend, his ex-best friend, had just told him that he was a fag. That's something he could not just forget about this easily. He normally would have walked home with Jason, that's what they had done for the past six years since they'd gotten to know each other, but obviously that was over now. He could never let anyone see him with that fairy again. Maybe they would even automatically think that *he* was gay too, only because he hung out with Jason. That would be fatal. He had not really noticed it but, while thinking, he began walking. He'd begun walking home. He tried to concentrate on something else, but his thoughts did not stop hitting the sensitive topic. If his friends found out, he would be banned from their circle, he was sure of that. Steven had always told him that he had noticed Jason looking at boys, at Eric for that matter, but he did not believe him. He had just replied that Jason was straight as an arrow. Well, straight indeed. How could Jason do that to him and just betray him in that way. That was not fair. His mother shook him out of his thoughts. "What's up, Tommy? You look somehow upset. And where is Jason?" "Mom, don't ask. Give me some time, okay? And don't expect Jason to be around here any more ... he's a fag." "Tommy, what are you talking about?" "I mean that he's one of those fucking cock-suckers." Tommy already was headed up the stairs, but his mother stopped him, as she did not really understand his behavior. "You mean, you don't want to be friends with Jason anymore, only because he told you that he's gay? That does not change his personality or who he is, Tommy." "You don't understand. It's more than that, so let me go now." He stormed up the stairs, into his room, and slammed the door with quite some force, making a loud noise. His mother was not far behind him and opened the door again a few moments later. "Tommy ..." "Mom, just give me some space and time alone. I have to get over Jason. I'd be grateful if you'd tell Dave that he shouldn't come into my room, okay?" His brother was the last persons he wanted to see around here. His mother shut the door and Tommy was alone with his feelings and thoughts. Well, that was what he had wanted, wasn't it? And it did feel good to be alone for once. He lay down on his bed and could not help himself shedding a few tears over Jason. He wanted the tears to stop, because he didn't want to cry over some sissy-boy, but the tears had a mind of their own. Those little streams of water kept rolling down his cheeks until the surface of his pillow became quite wet after just a short time. He then fell asleep, because of the mental exhaustion he was experiencing, as he explained his sleeping to himself later. He woke up again when it was already dark outside. Tommy sat up and looked around confused, until he remembered why he had cried. When the memory fully invaded his mind again, a few tears wanted to fall again, but he held them back. True, Jason had been his best friend, but now that he knew he was gay he could not hang around with him anymore. His good reputation would be destroyed and he would be a leper, as Jason would practically be now. Tommy had no intention to be silent about the reason why he and Jason were not together anymore between classes. And he *would* tell everybody before any rumors appeared about him. Of course, that was a pity for Jason, but that was Jason's problem and not his. And, come on, why did Jason have to be gay in first place? Tommy knew that he had to care for himself now. They were no longer an item. He felt a little sorry for Jason, he could not deny that, because Jason had no other friends beside him . It would probably be hard on Jason, but Tommy had to care about his life and he could not worry about some fag. A knock at the door shook him out of his train of thought. "Tommy, won't you come down and join us for dinner?" "Umm, yeah mom." He opened the door and his mother was quite shocked that her son seemed so shaken. She was sure she knew him well enough to know that Jason's homosexuality could not be the reason why everything affected him that much. Tommy, of course, didn't feel that himself, but sometimes mothers know more than their children do about themselves. "Mom, please stop looking at me that way. I'm okay." "Whatever ..." "Why did mothers always have to be that assuming? It was horrible that he always felt so exposed as soon as his mother laid his eyes on him. It was the same thing this time. He felt as if his mother knew something about him that he didn't know himself. He did not bother thinking about that too hard, because he first had to face his brother and dad at dinner. He guessed his mother had not told them, but you never know with parents. Dinner went absolutely normal, only his brother was his usual annoying self, pissing Tommy off with his comments on everything. His parents protected 'Davie-baby' on every possible occasion and let him make his mean jokes about everybody, mostly about Tommy though. Lucky for him that his mom had not told Dave about Jason, because he surely would have his fun with Jason's being gay and tell everybody about it. But isn't that what he wanted to do, too? Ahh no, that's a totally different thing ... Tommy was grateful that his mother allowed him to go upstairs early and he went straight to bed to, in the best case, forget about all his problems. He did fall asleep immediately , but woke up quite a few times during the night, as dreams and nightmares shook him awake. Every time he had awakened, his thoughts kept haunting his mind until he fell asleep again, only this time it was morning and the first sunbeams already shone through the window. His mother woke him from his sleep at 7:30, after he'd slept maybe two hours, and told him to get up. He complied, but was no use to anybody throughout breakfast. When he started on his way to school, he thought it to be incredibly lonely without Jason by his side, but soon he forced himself not to think about that fag-boy anymore. The nearer he got to the school the more he dreaded being there. He feared meeting Jason somewhere in the halls, while rushing to his rooms, but he did not catch a glimpse of him. Maybe he was ill. At lunch he sat with Eric and Steven who were the first to notice that Jason was not hanging around Tommy. All of his other friends had probably been too occupied with going to their classes and stuff, but neither Eric or Steven seemed to have any problems concerning the new school year. "What's with your beloved Jason-baby, Tommy?" "Don't talk about that fag." "He's a fag? What have I said ... that fairy. Guys, I told you I noticed him looking at Eric and some other guys. Tommy, I hope you've told him to piss off and stop hanging around us." "Steven, please ... that's not really such a problem." Eric had felt the need to say something. "Oh, I did tell him that I'll beat the shit out of him, if he even dares to look at me." "Tommy, are you sure about that?" "Eric, are you queer, too?" Steven had turned around and looked accusingly at Eric. "... No! No, I'm not, but it's not Jason's *fault* that he's gay." "Eric? " "Steven, I know you're against it, but ..." "No 'buts'. If you sympathize with him, you can go to him and suck his cock." "Steven, let's not talk about it anymore, okay?" "Yeah, okay. So Tommy, any plans how to take care of that sissy? " "Don't know ... I have not really thought about it. I just don't want to have anything to do with him." "I think you have to do something *about* him. I mean, come on, you can't just let him run around like that. Does anybody know about him yet?" "Besides you, Eric, and me nobody, I think." "Well, we should change that. Marti, Lenny, Cedric, and Randy get over here?" Soon the summoned boys were at the table that Steven, Eric and Tommy sat at. "What's up Steven?" "Have you already heard *the* news? Jason Matthews, homeroom R302, is a fag." "No shit, Stevie? You sure?" "Yeah, he told my buddy Tommy over here yesterday." "This little girlie-boy? That's alright." "Wow, Steve, that's indeed *the* news today. Who else knows?" "Besides you and us, nobody. I'll fill in the basketball team. Would you do me a favor and tell the others? The point is, we have to protect the men of our school from that cocksucker, don't we?" "Right, Steven." "Yep, everybody will know by the time school's out today." "I knew I could count on you guys. See ya around." The others left for their friends and they had been right: by the end of the last period everybody knew about Jason's sexual orientation and when Jason stepped out of the school building at least 500 pairs of eyes awaited him. Jason did not quite understand why everybody seemed to wait for *him*. That means, he surely assumed that it had to be about him, as well as the whispering in the hallways, but he did not dare think that it would come to such an extent. Everybody on the campus was staring at him with disgust and some even with hatred. Tommy stood next to Eric and Steven in front of the crowd. He looked a little ashamed, if Jason interpreted the sight that greeted him right. Eric looked like he didn't approve any of this, but Steven on the other hand seemed to be totally disgusted by Jason, who did not really know what to do. He could surely not run away and hey, what would 500 people do to him after having hunted him down, anyway. Well, he had to risk going through the crowd and he had to hope that nothing besides some nasty comments would happen. He did indeed hope that. He slowly took one step at the time towards the crowd and then he focused in on Tommy, Eric and Steven. When he was 100 feet from the crowd when the comments began. "Sissy, fag-boy, you wanna have a little suck? Fairy, cock-sucker ..." He had to pass Tommy to get off the campus, as the crowd stood directly in front of the gate. Hoping Tommy wouldn't do what he had promised, Jason kept going towards him. When Tommy did not step aside to let him through, Jason stopped and looked down at his own feet, not even wishing to meet Tommy's eyes. Steven's voice interrupted the moment and shook both of them out of their thoughts. "ARE YOU GAY?" Jason looked up, first at Steven and then glanced back at Tommy. There was no hatred in Jason's look, but pain. He now searched Tommy eyes and looked pleadingly into them before he nodded. In that moment, there was something turning over in Tommy's heart and his mind realized that, too, except it did not move immediately into his consciousness just yet.