Date: Tue, 17 Aug 2010 20:49:38 -0700 (PDT) From: Shiloh Creek Subject: The Boys of Twillingate Shore: Chapter One - The Last Heartbeat The Boys of Twillingate Shore _____________________________ **DISCLAIMER: I own the rights to this story 100%. This story contains strong sexual content between minors (boy-boy), mature language, and some violence. If you are offended by this sort of material, please do NOT read any further. If you are underage (<18; <21 in some areas), please do NOT read any further. All characters, main setting, and places or people mentioned within Baton Rouge, Louisiana are completely, 100% fictional. If you find similarities between this story or any characters in this story in comparison to some place or someone in real life or other stories you may have read anywhere else, these circumstances are purely coincidental and do NOT reflect the intentions of the author of this story.** ---------------------------------- Hey everyone. This story is something I've been thinking about lately. I'm going to do whatever I can to make sure this story is genuine and is written well. All comments and criticisms are more than welcome. You can just email me at the address provided. If I don't get back to you right away or at all for some reason, don't be offended. I have a very busy schedule to be honest, so I will most likely spend my free time writing as opposed to replying to all of my emails and stuff like that. I hope you enjoy this story. The first chapter is actually much heavier than I originally planned, but you know, as an author, I've learned to just go with the flow when my mind gets to work. Anyway, enjoy the story. I'm not sure when the second chapter will be in, but I hope to have it in pretty soon. Thanks! ______________________________________ Chapter One "The Last Heartbeat" Baton Rouge, Louisiana February 22, 1998 KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!!! Logan Henderson awoke with a start when he heard the hard rapping on the front door downstairs. He quickly sat up in his bed, almost forgetting how to breathe. He glanced over at his bedside clock. It was 2:36 in the morning! Thunder roared like a starving lion outside, causing the walls of the house to vibrate crazily. Who the hell would be at the door this time of the. KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!!! The boy quickly jumped out of bed, put on the basketball shorts and green t-shirt he had discarded before going to sleep, and then he swiftly made his way downstairs towards the front door. He stopped about halfway down the staircase. His nanny Sophia was already preparing to answer the door herself. The older woman was wearing a light purple bathrobe and her Lucille-Ball-red hair was held up tightly in pink curlers. "Who's there, please?" Sophia inquired before opening the door. "Lieutenant Todd Edmund and Sergeant Jake Maffeo BRPD, ma'am," came a solid, demanding voice from the other side of the front door. Without asking another question, Sophia unlocked the door, flipped the golden hasp over, and then proceeded to open the door. Two big men in policeman uniforms and hats appeared on the other side of the threshold. Logan saw that it was raining really hard behind them. The trees in the front yard were swaying and shivering wildly. "Well, I do declare, gentleman, you'll just catch yourselves a deathly cold out there in that dreadful weather," Sophia said, her southern accent (which Logan had always assumed was fake) coming through strongly. She exaggerated the `dread' in dreadful. "Please, come on in." "That's mighty kind of you ma'am, but there's no time for that," Lieutenant Edmund pointed out matter-of-factly. "Is there a Mister Richard Henderson here at this time?" "Why, I'm afraid not, sir," Sophia said, her right hand latched over the collar of her robe to keep from exposing too much skin. "Mister Henderson's out of town on business right now. I'm afraid he won't be home until Tuesday night. Now, please, what's going on that you had to come out here at 2:30 in the morning for?" "Listen, ma'am, I'm afraid Mister Henderson's son, Jesse Henderson, has been in a serious accident," Lieutenant Edmund said casually, as if he was practically accustomed to delivering this sort of news. Logan's eyes widened in emotional panic. His legs wobbled unstably. He grabbed the railing of the stairs and eased himself down on the step to keep from falling down. His heart pumped wildly in his chest. An uncontrollable lump immediately formed inside his throat. He wanted to start crying, but the tears wouldn't come for some reason. "Oh no," Sophia said, her hand curled up into a fist and pressed against her lips in complete disbelief. "My god, is he alright?" "I'm afraid his condition is critical at this point," the lieutenant said dryly. "He's in the emergency room right now. They're doing whatever they can, but we don't know the details as of yet. Now, do you have a way of contacting Mister Henderson?" "Oh, yes sir," Sophia said, her voice sounding quaky and unstable. It was obvious she was trying not to cry herself. "He's on a business trip in Atlanta right now. I have his hotel number in case of emergencies." Logan sat on the staircase and listened attentively as the lieutenant instructed Sophia to call his father in Atlanta as soon as possible. Afterward, he explained what had happened. Apparently, Jesse and three of his friends, Buddy, Dan, and Chris, were carousing around town in Dan's jeep. All four of them were intoxicated. Dan lost control of the jeep somewhere on Interstate 10, the vehicle slammed into the cement side rail at over 85 miles an hour, Dan tried to turn the jeep but in doing so drove into the deadly path of a large eighteen-wheeler, which collided with the jeep perpendicularly. The eighteen-wheeler pushed the jeep for over four hundred feet before hurdling the smaller vehicle over the metal railing near an exit ramp, causing the vehicle to flip down the small hill and land at the bank of the service road. Buddy and Chris had been killed instantly due to the impact of the eighteen-wheeler to the passenger side of the vehicle. Dan died a few minutes later at the scene. The paramedics tried to resuscitate him, but unfortunately with no success. His injuries were far too fatal and he passed away before they could even get him onto a gurney. Logan remembered the three of them sitting in the living room just nine or ten hours ago watching television with Jesse. They were talking about going to the lake tomorrow. Chris's crush, Diana Greenwood, would be there. Jesse, who had been sitting in the back seat behind the driver's seat, was now in critical condition. He was still alive and now in the hospital, but the policemen said they weren't sure about his chances of living yet. The lieutenant told Sophia which emergency room to go to. A few minutes later, the policemen left the house and Sophia immediately tried calling Richard Henderson at his hotel phone number in Atlanta. As the phone rang and she waited for Logan's father to pick up, she instructed Logan to go back upstairs and put on some more appropriate clothing. She said they would be leaving for the hospital in a few minutes. As Logan stumbled up the stairs, he heard Sophia greet his father over the phone. Within seconds, her voice began to quake uncontrollably. She could no longer fight back her tears as she tried to explain the situation to Richard. As Logan walked into his bedroom, he could picture his father on the other side of that conversation in Atlanta. He was probably still up anyway. Reading a John Grisham thriller most likely. Smoking a cigar. A half-drank glass of chardonnay probably sitting on the table next to the sofa. He was now probably trying to calm his emotional housekeeper down long enough for her to at least tell him what was going on. Logan changed into a pair of blue jeans and a long-sleeved t-shirt. He threw his blue, hooded sweatshirt on over that. He sat down on the side of his unmade bed and slipped his white tennis shoes on without putting on socks first. He looked down at his feet, his ankles exposed because he wasn't wearing socks. He should probably grab some socks out of his top drawer. Maybe Jesse needed some clean socks. His were probably dirty now. Or perhaps the nurses or doctors or whoever already took his socks off his injured feet. Now his feet were probably freezing in that hospital. Logan wanted to cry. The lump was stuck in his throat like a potato chip that hadn't been thoroughly chewed before swallowing. But the tears wouldn't come out. His tear glands were on some kind of strike now. Of course! Just when he needs his tear glands, they fail to do their job. The boy left his bedroom and made his way down the hall towards Jesse's bedroom. He quietly opened the door as if Jesse was on the other side of that door sleeping in his bed, ready to wake up and pounce on his eleven year old brother who's sneaking into his room at 3:02 in the morning to steal socks from his underwear drawer. Logan switched the light on, noting the sudden emptiness of his older brother's bedroom. Clothes, both clean and dirty, scattered on the floor and the bed, books stacked in semi-neat piles in the corner of his room, an unopened Butterfingers candy bar laying on the nightstand next to a glass of water and a book, the sweet and sour aroma of seventeen year old boy lingering in the air. Logan quickly opened the top drawer of Jesse's dresser and grabbed the first pair of balled up socks he could see. Afterward, he closed the drawer and left the bedroom, making sure to turn the light off and close the door behind him, just like Jesse had always requested before. ---------------------------------- The time was now 3:55 in the morning. The emergency room lights were really bright, even in the cold waiting room. Some old rerun of Andy Griffith was playing on the television set in the waiting room. Logan sat on the uncomfortable sofa in front of the television leaning up against Sophia, his head resting against her shoulder. Thunder was still rumbling obnoxiously outside. Lightning occasionally lit the waiting room up even more than the harsh lights of the fluorescent tubes. Rain was pounding the plate glass windows on the side of the waiting room. Every now and then, Sophia would reach over and run her fingers through Logan's longish blond hair, just as she had always done when they watched movies together in the living room at home, his head resting on her lap. Sophia had been the Henderson's housekeeper and nanny for nearly eighteen years. Logan's parents had hired her three weeks before Jesse was born. Six years later, less than four months after Logan was born, his mom, Danna Henderson, left Richard and the kids for a man twice her age who lived in Austria. She had not been seen or heard from since. Nonetheless, Sophia practically raised the boys herself, seeing as how Richard was always at work or out of town on business trips. On average, Richard was able to spend an added total of three months per year at home, leaving Sophia to take care of the boys the other nine months. Sophia was the only mother Logan had ever known. He had always been quite attached to her, as if she and him shared a genuine mother-son bond. Sophia had a daughter of her own who lived in Shreveport. She was married and had just recently given birth to a baby girl. Sophia occasionally took trips up there to visit. Sometimes she took Logan along with her if Richard was out of town. Logan couldn't pay attention to the television set. There was far too much going on here in the emergency room. A group of doctors and nurses were rushing a young, injured woman on a gurney down the hallway towards some other section, probably for a surgery of some kind. She had blood all over her face. There was a young male nurse pushing an old man in a wheelchair through the waiting room towards the hallways on the other side. The old man was wearing a breathing mask. Logan could hear a little kid screaming bloody murder in another room somewhere in that hallway where they took the bloody woman on the gurney. On the sofa across from Logan and Sophia, there was a little boy - probably five or six years younger than Logan - cradled in his daddy's arms. He looked really sick and pale, as if he had some kind of incurable disease. Logan decided to cross doctor off his list of possible career choices. He knew he could never have the stomach for it. "When will Dad be here?" Logan asked in a barely audible force. "What'd you say, sweetheart?" Sophia asked. "I said, when will Dad be here?" Logan asked again, but louder. "Oh. Well, he said he'd take the next plane out he could get. It'll probably be another few hours at least, honey." Logan didn't respond to that. Instead, he laid his head down on her lap, hoping to get a little bit of sleep. He closed his eyes. The noise in the hospital was crazy. How could a person sleep in a place as noisy as this? Sophia ran her long fingernails gently over Logan's back. He always loved her back-scratches. His eyes began to feel heavy. The noise began to fade around him. ---------------------------------- Logan awoke to the sight of his father sitting on the sofa across from him - the same sofa that sick boy and his father had been sitting on before. His father was asleep. His red tie was loosened around his neck. The top button of his blue shirt was unlatched. His black jacket was draped over his arm. The waiting room looked completely different now. Light illuminated the whole room. Pure light. The morning sun was shining brightly through the windows of the waiting room. Logan's hands were inside the large front pocket of his blue hooded sweatshirt, both hands locked onto the balled up pair of socks that he had grabbed out of Jesse's dresser before he and Sophia left the house. Logan sat up groggily and glanced over at the clock that hung above the television set. Half past eight in the morning. The boy sat up on the sofa, which awoke Sophia who's lap Logan had been sleeping on. Sophia rubbed her eyes and yawned deeply as she allowed the morning to wake her up. "Morning, sweetheart," the woman said sympathetically, deliberately leaving out the word `good.' "When did Dad get here?" Logan asked simply. "About an hour ago," Sophia said. "I'm sure he's exhausted. We're waiting on the doctor to tell us what's going on." "Is Jesse okay?" Sophia pursed her lips and swallowed hard, as if striving to block a lump. She turned her body around to face Logan completely. "Honey, Jesse was hurt very badly in the accident," Sophia said carefully. "Now, you're not a little boy anymore, so I don't see the need in hiding anything from you. The truth of the matter is. there's a chance Jesse may not live through this. The odds are very against him at this point." Logan's eyes widened slightly as he absorbed what his nanny had just told him. He wanted to cry again. But still, the tears wouldn't come. He looked away from Sophia and stared over at the television set, trying desperately to keep himself in one piece. Happy Days was on. There was something particularly ironic about that. A little while later, Richard woke up and saw Logan sitting next to Sophia on the sofa across from him. Wow. His little boy was growing up so fast. His hair was slightly longer now than it was the last time he saw him. How long had it been now? Richard thought about it for a few seconds. He had left town right after New Years. He had come and gone from the house several times since then, but Logan was always either at school or already asleep when Richard was there. Richard cleared his throat of the morning phlegm, which caught Logan's attention right away. "Dad," Logan said simply with just hint of excitement in his voice. "Hey, buddy," Richard said as Logan leaped off the sofa and ran straight into Richard's awaiting arms. Richard embraced the boy tightly, almost afraid to let him go now. "Where were you?" Logan asked demandingly, his voice now quivering. "I got here as soon as I could, buddy," Richard said softly. Logan felt that lump grow so strongly in his throat that he could no longer contain himself. Tears welled up in his eyes and began to flood over quickly. His whole body began to shake violently as his crying took on some momentum. He had so desperately wanted to cry since he found out about the car accident, but he hadn't been able to until now. Now, he knew it would take an army to get him to stop crying. Richard held his boy in his arms as tightly as he could without squeezing him too hard. He could feel the boy trembling uncontrollably in his arms. He could hear the boy crying on his shoulder. He could now feel the dampness of Logan's tears seeping into the shoulder of his business shirt. Logan's arms were wrapped tightly around Richard's neck. Richard caught Sophia's sympathetic, motherly stare from where she sat on the sofa across from him. He wanted to say something to comfort his son. Anything at all. But he understood there was nothing he could say. All he could do now was hug him tightly and tell him that he loved him. Oh yeah! Richard hadn't told him that yet. "I love you so much, Logan," Richard said and then kissed the boy on the head sweetly. Richard ran his hand through the boy's hair comfortingly, trying everything he knew to calm him down. But the boy's crying persisted and even grew stronger. Richard could see others in the waiting room watching this display of emotions with understanding. He knew these strangers were empathetic towards the situation, even if they didn't know what was going on. Richard was sure he could ask anyone in the room to tell him a story similar to his, and he figured each of them would be able to. Richard stopped the embrace suddenly and gently stood the boy up in front of his face. Logan's face was distorted from crying. His whole face was wet with tears. His hair was disheveled. Richard placed his hand on the boy's cheek lovingly and ran it through his blond hair once again. "Logan, I'm not going anywhere, okay?" Richard promised him. Logan nodded understandingly, his crying beginning to die down a bit, his breathing beginning to catch up once more after so much crying between short breaths. "We're going to stay together through all of this, okay?" Richard said. "Sophia and I are here with you." "I-I wish Jesse w-w-was okay," Logan said between sobs. "I know, sport. I do too," Richard said. He so wanted to cry himself, to grieve for what had happened to his oldest son. But he knew he had to be as strong and as calm as possible for his little boy who was now in such an emotionally delicate position. Richard glanced over at Sophia. She was still staring at the two of them sympathetically. She had a tissue in her hand, balled up, her fist and tissue pressed up just below her nose and blocking her mouth. They traded an almost telepathic gaze, a knowing that was understood between the two of them, the knowledge that everything could and probably would get worse sometime in the very near future. ---------------------------------- Two Hours Later The doctor had come into the waiting room and took Richard aside away from Sophia and Logan. They walked down the hallway, the doctor explaining Jesse's current position. Jesse had fallen into a severe coma. The only thing keeping him alive was life support. The doctor and Richard walked into a private room. There was a teenage boy lying on the bed, hooked up to countless vinyl tubes, numerous casts and bandages covering a majority of his body, his head wrapped in a white gauze-looking cap. Jesse looked worse than Richard could have ever imagined. Up until now, Richard strived hard not to think about what Jesse might look like after the wreck. This was far worse than he could have pictured. The boy's face - the areas not covered in bandages - was bruised and scratched beyond recognition. Richard tried not to wonder what the areas under the bandages and casts looked like. He couldn't believe this practically mummified person was his son. There was no way! Jesse was a strong, athletic boy. His skin was always tanned, even in winter. His hair was always blond, like that of a sun god. It just couldn't be him there under the confines of those horrid bandages and casts. Where was that beautiful boy Richard knew? ".and the areas you're seeing, scar tissue mostly, minor cuts and bruises," the doctor explained professionally. "I must say, sir, that it's a wonder he's alive at all due to the severe head trauma. He fell into what we suspect is a level four or possibly even a level three coma, which is considered the worst. His level of consciousness is at a very minimal state presently." Richard listened halfheartedly as the doctor explained in more detail about Jesse's critical condition. As the doctor spoke, Richard walked over to the side of the hospital bed to stand next to his oldest boy. He gently placed his hand on top of Jesse's right hand, which wasn't bandaged at all. The hand was very bruised and scratched up though. Richard took a long look at the boy's skin on his hand and arm as the doctor continued to speak to him about Jesse's condition. No hint of tanned skin anywhere. Even the unbruised, unscratched areas of the boy's arm was a pale bluish white color, the color Richard remembered his grandmother's skin was when she was in the nursing home before she died. Once the doctor finished explaining the details of Jesse's condition, he then began to explain Richard's options concerning Jesse. A one in a hundred-thousand chance that Jesse would make it out of here alive, but in a permanent vegetative state. A point-one chance in a hundred-thousand that Jesse would make it out of here alive and just need a few years of physical therapy in order to live as a crippled man for the rest of his life, probably without the ability to speak or hear ever again. A point-zero-zero-one chance in a hundred-thousand that Jesse would get up within the next few months and be able to simply walk out of the hospital with no need for physical therapy or even a wheelchair for that matter. In other words, a ninety-nine-thousand-nine-hundred-ninety-nine-point-nine-nine-nine chance out of a hundred-thousand that Jesse would not walk out of this hospital back to the life he had before. Not even close to that. Those days were now over. The choice was now Richard's though. His oldest son's life was now in his hands. There the boy lay. Not even a boy anymore. He was ready to cross that line into manhood. He was on top of the world just yesterday. About to be a senior in high school, getting ready for college, finding the girl of his dreams to eventually marry and have kids with, watching his children grow up - none of that would ever happen for Jesse now, even if by the grace of God Himself Jesse lived through this somehow. Richard's oldest son's life was now in his hands. The doctor went on to say that it would be better to wait a little while longer before making any final decisions. "Maybe it would be best all around for you and your family to go home, rest up for a little while, and discuss the situation before making any decisions," the doctor suggested. "There's really nothing more you can do here at the emergency room. In fact, what I would like to do is move Jesse into the children's hospital for the time being until decisions can be made concerning him." "Oh," Richard said. "Yeah, go ahead and do that if you will. That'll be fine." "Very well," the doctor said. "We'll just need you to sign a release form at the front desk that will give the emergency room permission to move Jesse to the children's hospital. Other than that, I'll give you my phone number here and you can call me whenever you need to. We'll give you a call at least once a day to let you know how Jesse is doing and we'll call immediately in the event that something changes." "Changes?" Richard asked. "For better or worse," the doctor said. "We'll call you." ---------------------------------- Seven Hours Later Logan, Richard and Sophia were all lounging quietly in the den, the television on, but with no one paying any attention to it. Logan was rolling Jesse's balled up pair of socks in his hands, staring at them intently, still angry that his dad wouldn't let him put them on Jesse's feet before they left the emergency room. Richard sat on the opposite side of the couch from Logan. He appeared to be staring at the floor, but he might as well have been star-gazing in the middle of the countryside, like in his hometown in Oregon which was tens of miles away from anywhere. His oldest son's life was now in his hands. What could he do with that? He felt that any decision he made would somehow be unfair to Jesse. He hadn't mentioned the options the doctor had given him to either Sophia or Logan. He was waiting for the right time to bring it up. Sophia sat on the love seat, her feet reclined on the coffee table with a throw pillow underneath her heels. Her fist was once again pressed up against her mouth, a balled up tissue sticking out the opening of her fist. She was also staring at the floor with the same lost expression on her face that Richard had. She had known Jesse for as long as he had been alive. She was at the hospital that beautiful day Jesse was born. She had only been working for the Henderson's for a few weeks by that time. She was all of thirty-eight years old then. Nearly eighteen years later, Sophia was afraid she may have to witness that sweet young man's death. No person that young should die, Sophia thought to herself. It's just unfair. Richard sighed heavily and then spoke up. "Are you guys hungry at all?" Richard asked. "We haven't really eaten today." "I had those donut holes from the vending machine this morning," Logan said without taking his gaze away from Jesse's socks. "Well, are you hungry now, sport?" Richard asked. Logan shrugged apathetically. "Eh, not really," Logan said simply. "Okay," Richard said. "How about you, Sophia? You hungry at all?" "I could go for some dinner if you're hungry," Sophia said. "I can whip up some spaghetti and meat sauce real quick. And maybe some garlic bread?" "That sounds heavenly, Sophia. Thank you," Richard said. Without another word spoken, Sophia sniffled a couple of times, unrolled the tissue she had in her fist, and blew her nose as she got up and headed for the kitchen. Richard glanced over at Logan who was sitting still on his corner of the large sofa, still staring at those socks he so desperately wanted to put on Jesse's feet. Richard had tried to explain that Jesse's feet were already very well covered up, that he didn't need the socks. But Richard now wondered if he should have just let the boy take the socks to Jesse and leave them there for him, regardless of whether or not Jesse would use them. This morning, Logan looked older somehow. But now, Logan was beginning to look like a little boy again, helpless in every sense of the word. A little while later, the three of them sat down to a dinner of spaghetti and meat sauce, tossed salad with Sophia's homemade southern dressing, and garlic bread. No one said a word during dinner, except for Richard who politely complemented Sophia for the delectable dinner she had thrown together. Otherwise, they ate in complete silence. When they were finished with dinner, Sophia collected the dishes and began to clean the kitchen. Out of just mere habit, Logan got up and helped Sophia wash the dishes and clean the kitchen. They worked together in total silence. Richard watched his little boy help Sophia in the kitchen. He felt a twinge of pride for the boy. He may have been raised in a wealthy house, but he was in no way spoiled. He was so sweet and innocent. He always managed to do his fair share around the house. Sophia saw to that herself. Jesse had always been the same way as well. Since Danna left eleven years ago, Jesse immediately picked up the slack and helped raise his little brother at the tender age of six. He had always been a little trooper. Richard felt that he owed a great debt to Sophia for giving his boys the structure they needed in their lives, for actually doing a great deal of the raising of his boys. He was always so very proud of his boys. Now, he felt disappointed in Jesse. How could he do something so stupid as to allow himself to get drunk and then get into a vehicle with his three drunk friends? Chris, Dan, and Buddy - all three of them were now dead. Those four boys had a brotherly bond that Richard sometimes envied. Richard began to remember times that those three boys would stay overnight at his house with Jesse. Even though they were all very close, each one of them was an ingredient for mischief, and the four of them together created one giant cake of mischief and destruction. Richard recalled the summer about four years ago when the four boys were roughly thirteen years old; they were all at Richard's house for a week while Richard was on a three-week vacation from work. Sophia had gone to Shreveport to visit her daughter and son-in-law. One night during that week, after Richard had already gone to bed, the four boys broke into Richard's liquor cabinet in the kitchen. Logan, only seven years old at this time, was up as well and took the liberty of drinking some of the booze that the boys had offered him. That next morning, Richard woke up to find empty beer bottles and half-empty bottles of tequila, Jack Daniels, and Wild Turkey all over the kitchen, living room, and the den. Buddy was passed out on the kitchen table with vomit all over himself and the table. Dan and Jesse were passed out on the den floor, both of them wearing nothing but their underwear. Chris was passed out in the bathroom next to the toilet, also only wearing his underwear and nothing else. Then to Richard's utter shock, he found seven-year-old Logan passed out in the laundry room, completely naked and covered in his own vomit. Needless to say, Jesse had been spanked within an inch of his life after he got over his twenty-four hour hangover and Logan had also been spanked for allowing himself to get involved in his big brother's mischief. On top of that, the three sets of other parents had come to pick their boys up after Richard called them and then all of them called him a bad parent to his face. To this day, Richard had still not lived that incident down. It had taken over a year before those four boys were allowed to hang out with one another at all outside of school again. And now, here those same four boys were four years later in a quite similar predicament; only this time, there would be no penitence for their actions. Chris was dead now for what he had done. Dan was dead now for what he had done. Buddy was dead now for what he had done. Jesse was now in a coma and on life support for what he had done. Richard thought about this heavily as he watched Sophia and Logan clean the kitchen. He couldn't believe that those four boys had gone so far as to get drunk and then get into a vehicle and drive. He was so sure those boys were much more mature than that now. After all, they weren't thirteen anymore. Perhaps they were better off getting drunk back then though. At least then none of them had access to drivers licenses and vehicles and the keys that operated those vehicles. There was a certain dramatic irony attached to all of this. But Richard decided he didn't want to think about it anymore. He felt so disappointed in all four of the boys in a way. But he knew this time it wouldn't do any good to get mad about it. The deed was done. Three of them were now dead and Jesse was probably not too far behind them in all reality. Perhaps he should make a call to Chris's parents, Dan's parents, and Buddy's parents. Sophia said she had seen Dan's parents at the emergency room the night before, but no sight of any of the others. "Sophia, would you mind pouring me a glass of wine?" Richard asked. "Of course," Sophia said. "Logan, come on over to the table," Richard instructed. "The three of us have something very important to talk about." Sophia brought Richard a glass of wine and then sat down. Logan sat down on the other side of the table from Sophia. Richard took several swigs of his sweet merlot, cleared his throat, and then spoke up. He explained to them in his own words what the doctor had told him about Jesse's condition. Afterward, he led into the discussion of the options that the doctor had laid out for him concerning Jesse and the life support. He explained that the doctor was moving Jesse to the children's hospital until a decision could be made, and that they should probably give it a few days before they make any final decisions. "I want your honest-to-God opinions about what should be done," Richard said matter-of-factly. "I've done the math myself. Basically, the chances are slim to none that Jesse will wake up from this coma at all. And even if he does, the chances then are slim to none that he'll ever regain a sense of normalcy. The doctor explained that the chances are greater that if he lived through this at all, he would live as a vegetable." "Well, what are the chances that he'll wake up and live a normal life?" Sophia asked. "The doctor said there's a point-zero-zero-one chance. out of one-hundred-thousand that Jesse will wake up and be just fine," Richard said. That deathly silence returned to the room immediately with this announcement. Richard looked over at Logan. The boy had tears streaming down his face again, but he wasn't crying full out this time like he was earlier. Richard and Sophia caught each other's gazes. They stared into each other's eyes knowingly. Both of them understood that chances as slim as these were practically miracle-proof. They both knew the only thing they could do was pray now. That was about it. Richard knew he'd be spending a great deal of his time from here on out negotiating with God Himself, asking Him what he should do. ---------------------------------- Later that night, completely unable to fall asleep, Logan crawled out of his bed at about 2:30 in the morning, put on his basketball shorts, and then he walked down the hall to his big brother's bedroom. In Jesse's room, he discarded his shorts again, leaving him in just his white Fruit of the Looms. On top of Jesse's dresser sat a stuffed blue monkey that Jesse had won after playing a ring-toss game in New Orleans on New Years Eve about nine years before. For some odd reason, Jesse had favored that stupid monkey over any stuffed animal he ever owned, which was why he still had it in his room at seventeen years old. Logan picked up that monkey and crawled into Jesse's king-sized bed. As soon as he cradled that monkey in his arms, he began to cry. He cried so hard that he couldn't stop. Eventually, he cried himself to sleep. ---------------------------------- Three Days Later Tuesday morning. It certainly didn't seem like Tuesday to Richard. Honestly, he wasn't sure what this day seemed like to him. For the past three days, he had been living in a limbo where days came and went without names. He and Sophia sat at the kitchen table drinking their morning coffee together. Richard was wearing a t-shirt and a pair of flannel pajama pants. Sophia was wearing her purple bathrobe and her hair was up in curlers. They were both very quiet this morning, which was no surprise considering the house had been deathly quiet the last several days. Logan was still asleep. So was Richard's mother, Ruth Henderson, who had flown in the evening before from Oregon. "Did Logan sleep in Jesse's bed again last night?" Richard asked before taking a sip of his coffee. "Yes. He's sleeping with that monkey doll again too," Sophia said. "Ugh, I so hoped we had weaned him from sleeping with stuffed animals," Richard said, his learned Louisiana accent coming through. "Chances are, he'll sleep with that damn monkey for the rest of his childhood." "Perhaps there's nothing wrong with that in this case, Richard," Sophia said. "After all, he's just keeping whatever he can of his big brother. How's your mother taking all of this so far?" "She doesn't seem to know how to take it," Richard said honestly. "I explained to her last night that I've been given the choice to take Jesse off of life support if I decide to." "What'd she say?" "She just told me she'd support my decision no matter what I choose to do. But she's taking this whole thing pretty hard. I could hear her crying from my bedroom last night." "Oh no. Have you tried to get in touch with Danna at all?" "I have no idea where to even start to get in touch with her. Last I heard, she moved to Switzerland with her husband. That was like five years ago though. No telling where she is these days to be honest with you. Besides, she doesn't deserve to be in on this anyway. She chose not to be involved in the boys' lives, so if she never knows what's happened, that's her own damn fault." "I can understand that," Sophia said simply. "I spoke to Buddy's father on the phone last night," Richard said. "Oh yeah? What'd he have to say?" "Well, thanks be to the good Lord above, they're not all blaming me for what happened this time." "Well, of course not. You had nothing to do with any of this. If anything, they should be blaming me for it." "Now, why would you go and say something like that?" "I should have never let Jesse go that night. They were all over here earlier that day after they got out of school. Jesse said they would be spending the night at Dan's house and then they all left in that jeep of Dan's together. I should've told Jesse `no.'" "Sophia, you sweet ol' gal, I don't want you to think for a minute that any of this was your fault. You were no more or less lied to by those boys than any of the other parents were that night." Sophia chose not to respond to that comment. She took a swig of her coffee. "Buddy's father told me all three boys' funerals will be this coming Saturday," Richard continued. "He told me oh-so-carefully that there's still some room for Jesse too on that day if we decide to.you know." "Now, how does a man go about telling a parent something like that?" Sophia asked, her southern accent coming through quite strong. "He tripped over his words quite a bit, but he managed to ask me in a way that didn't seem too offensive or off-putting," Richard said. "It seems like that's the type of announcement you shouldn't make to a parent who's child hasn't died yet. but honestly the idea sounds quite practical; therefore, deeming such a ghastly announcement more appropriate than one would think. Those boys were all like brothers, you know." "Oh I know they were. I remember all too well how close they were. I've been thinking about that a lot the last couple of days." "Yeah, me too." "Do you remember Jesse's ninth birthday party at the YMCA? We had a party for all four of them that year because their birthdays were all within three months of one another. That was such a great party." Richard chuckled. "Yeah, and Chris's parents accidentally gave Jesse their card to Chris which had seventy-five dollars in it and they gave Chris the card they meant to give Jesse, which had twenty dollars in it." Sophia chuckled as well. "And all four of those boys pushed the clown into the pool, along with the cake and the bowl of fruit punch," Sophia recalled with a smile draped across her face. Richard shook his head, as if still in disbelief of that particular event. "Yep, that ended the party real quick. I swear, those boys were just crazy together." Richard let a cold silence overtake him. Sophia reached over and laid her hand on top of Richard's. Richard obliged and held Sophia's comforting hand. "I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you here with me, Sophia," Richard said bravely. "We were just so blessed that you came into our lives when you did." "Why, thank you, Richard. Every nanny wants to hear that from her boss." "You're more than that to us, Sophia. I do hope you know that. You've been more of a mother and caretaker than Danna ever was or ever could have been with those boys." Sophia had a warm smile draped across her face. A single tear escaped her eye and traveled down her cheek. Richard continued to grip the woman's hand. "I don't know what to do," Richard said simply. "What does your heart tell you?" Sophia asked warmly. "Honestly, my heart, my head, my very soul - they're all telling me the same thing I think God's been telling me the last couple of days: that I need to let Jesse go." "I believe that would be best as well, Richard. No parent should ever have to make a decision like this for their child. But in this case, I think Jesse himself would tell you to let him go on to Heaven." "I do believe you're right. I think we can all be at peace with this decision. Even Logan eventually." "You know he'll take this the hardest. That little boy loves his brother more than anything in the world. It just hurts my heart to think of that little tyke in such pain." "I know. It hurts my heart as well," Richard said, his voice quivering somewhat. "But this is the right thing to do, I believe. I believe it with ever fiber of my being." Sophia swallowed real hard, as if trying to get rid of a lump in her throat. "When.when.?" Sophia asked, unable to finish the sentence. "Today," Richard said after a few seconds of silence. "That way he can have his funeral with his best friends on Saturday." "We need to tell Logan when he wakes up," Sophia said. "We have to be straight with him now." "And we will be," Richard said simply. "As soon as he wakes up, we'll tell him. And we'll tell Mother too, of course. Then we'll go to the hospital." ---------------------------------- 8:24 PM Logan stood between Sophia and his grandmother inside Jesse's hospital room. His dad and Pastor Rogers from church stood on the left side of Jesse's bed. The doctor and one nurse stood on the right side of the bed next to the machines that currently kept Jesse alive. Chris's parents, Dan's parents, and Buddy's parents were all sitting in the hospital chapel together along with a few other members from church, a couple of Richard's close friends and colleagues from work, and several friends of Jesse's and the other three boys' from school. Logan stood in front of the bed staring straight ahead at his older brother, knowing that in a few minutes Jesse would finally come face to face with God Himself. He wanted to cry again. He so desperately wanted to cry again. But he was pretty sure he had drained every last tear he had in him after his dad and Sophia told him this morning what they had decided to do. He had cried so hard that he started coughing. He screamed at his dad, calling him a murderer. Then he collapsed on the floor, completely exhausted of all the crying he had been doing lately. His dad sat down on the ground with him and Logan cried on the man's shoulder again. Now he was standing in front of his nearly lifeless older brother, wishing he could reverse time and beg Jesse not to go out that night. "Okay, everyone, I would like to lead all of us in prayer," Pastor Rogers said calmly. With that, everyone in the room grabbed each other's hands, including the doctor and the nurse, forming a large semi-circle around Jesse and the bed. Pastor Rogers placed his hand on Jesse's hand gently. Everyone closed their eyes and bowed their heads respectfully for prayer. Logan's grandmother was crying next to him. She had been crying basically since she arrived from Oregon the day before. Logan's dad was beginning to sob as well. Logan scanned the room and noticed almost everyone beginning to cry and sniffle. "My Dear, Gracious Heavenly Father, we come to you tonight knowing that our fellow brother, Jesse Kieran Henderson, will be in your perfect presence here very shortly. We come to you tonight asking, not for grace and comfort on Jesse's part because we all know you'll deliver that for him anyway, but for Your grace and comfort to be bestowed upon the Henderson family here who will be left to suffer the loss of their beloved family member. We ask that you bring peace to their minds, for they will know that Jesse feels no more pain, nor sadness, nor shame, nor guilt. He will be at Your compassionate, loving mercy for all eternity, which is something each of us in this room desire to have eventually. As a personal request from Jesse's kid brother, Logan Henderson, he asked me earlier to pray that you tell Jesse when he gets to Heaven how much his little brother loves him. We ask you Lord, to give this family the strength to make it through this hard time and that You'll touch their hearts and heal them of their suffering. We ask of all these things in Your precious and holy name. Amen." Everyone stopped holding hands after the prayer ended. Logan felt tears falling down his cheeks again. He was beginning to wonder where all these tears were coming from. It seemed to be an endless amount within the past four days. Pastor Rogers patted Jesse's hand gently and said in a very soft voice, "God bless you, little brother." After he said that, he shook hands with Logan's dad sympathetically and then quietly exited the room, shutting the door behind him. This was it. This was the time in which Logan would have to say goodbye to his brother forever. The doctor said a few respectful words to the family and then said it was time to turn the machines off. Richard nodded his head towards the doctor in approval, choosing not to say anything. The doctor motioned for the nurse to help him turn off the machines. With that, the doctor and the nurse turned off a few toggle switches ever so casually, as if they were just simply flipping off a few light switches. Once the machine switches were all turned off, the doctor and the nurse quietly left the room out of respect for the family. Ruth walked over to the bed and stood beside her grandson. The electrocardiogram machine was beeping repetitively. Logan watched as the little lines traveled up and down on the screen, the humps becoming smaller and smaller. Ruth bent down and gently kissed her oldest grandson on the cheek. Afterward, with tears streaming down her face, she left the room as well. Sophia's turn. She walked over to the bed and bent down to give Jesse a kiss on the cheek as well. Afterward, she walked over to Logan and gave him a short, sweet hug, and then left the room, leaving Logan and Richard alone with Jesse. The machine was still beeping repeatedly. Other than the continual beeping of the electrocardiogram machine, the silence in the room was overwhelming. Logan stood in front of the bed watching as his older brother's life was fading in front of him. Richard walked over to Logan and took him by the hand, leading him to the side of the bed next to Jesse. Richard leaned down and kissed Jesse on the cheek, without saying a word. Afterward, Logan followed suit and kissed his older brother on the cheek sweetly, tears cascading down his own cheeks. When he lifted his head up, Logan saw that he left a tear on Jesse's cheek. Logan gently held Jesse's hand as the time interval between continual beeps increased steadily. Richard reached over and placed his own hand on top of his sons' hands. Richard lovingly draped his other arm around his younger son, who was now crying softly. The time between beeps now felt like an eternity. Logan stared down at his bandaged and bruised older brother with a love stronger than anything he had ever known. He understood that his brother wasn't really there anymore, even if the machine said his heart was still beating. But the heartbeats were decreasing. Logan reached down and placed his hand over Jesse's heart. He felt the lightest thump under the palm of his hand that coincided with the beeping of the machine. Four or five seconds between heartbeats felt like forever to Logan. "I love you, Jesse," Logan said weakly between sobs. Finally, Logan felt one last beat of Jesse's heart. A few seconds later, the machine flatlined. The beeping became one steady, continual hum. Jesse's breathing ceased. The life floated out of his body in a split second. Logan's crying increased as the realization took over him that his brother was now gone forever. Logan let go of his brother's hand, turned around, and buried his face in his father's chest, crying with all of his might. Richard, too, was crying softly. Outside the hospital, the last dim shade of sunlight disappeared beyond the western horizon, welcoming the night to take over. ---------------------------------- March 1, 1998 Logan watched as the four caskets were all lowered into their respective plots that were aligned in a row. He stood beside his father, wearing a black suit and a black tie. They watched together as Jesse's dark brown casket - the second casket on the right - disappeared into the earth. Everyone around Logan was talking softly. There were literally hundreds of people at this quadruple funeral. If Logan had to guess, he would've said there were at least five hundred people present. Most of these people Logan didn't know. There were people huddled in groups conversing amongst one another. There were people standing by themselves. There were people standing in pairs talking to each other. Everyone was dressed in black. Elaborate flower arrangements were everywhere. Pictures on stands were under the four green tents, pictures of Jesse, Chris, Buddy, and Dan from times past. Logan had helped his grandma and Sophia pick out the pictures that would be used at the funeral: A recent, handsome class picture of Jesse wearing a Caribbean-blue polo shirt. An old picture of Jesse at about six years old wearing his Sesame Street pajamas, sitting in a recliner, holding baby Logan in his arms and smiling brightly at the camera. A picture of Jesse and Logan at about the ages of twelve and six respectively, in which they were standing in front of Cinderella's castle at Magic Kingdom in Disney World, both of them wearing Mickey Mouse ears. A more recent picture of Jesse and his girlfriend Samantha at the beach. A semi-recent picture of Jesse, Logan, Sophia, and Richard in New Orleans for Mardi Gras. And two pictures of Jesse, Chris, Dan, and Buddy: one picture of the four of them at about seven years old and a recent picture of the four of them at about sixteen years old. Logan had also helped choose the clothes that Jesse would be buried in: black slacks, black loafers, a black jacket, a white shirt, and Jesse's favorite tie, which had a picture of Bugs Bunny on it. People were beginning to leave the cemetery. The funeral was now over. The caskets were now being buried. Just the family members and close friends were sticking around now. Logan saw his grandma standing off to the side talking to two men. One of the men looked to be about Logan's dad's age. The other man, more of a teenage boy, looked to be about Jesse's age, perhaps a little younger. He recognized that boy from somewhere. He knew he had met him before. He just didn't remember where or when. Perhaps they were his grandmother's friends from Oregon. He remembered her telling his dad that a few people from Twillingate Shore would be coming down for the funeral. Logan looked over and saw that his dad was conversing back and forth with Pastor Rogers and Dan's parents and little sister. Sophia was standing close to the parking lot talking to her daughter and son-in-law who had driven in from Shreveport for the funeral. Sophia was cuddling her granddaughter in her arms. "Logan," came his grandmother's voice from behind him. Logan looked back at his grandmother. She was motioning for him to come over there to talk to her. She was still talking to that man and the teenage boy that Logan vaguely recognized from some other time. Logan sauntered over to where his grandmother and the two men were standing. "Cody, Jack, you remember my youngest grandson, Logan," Ruth said. "Sure I do," the older man said. "You were just a little buck the last time I saw you." "Logan, this is Jack Haynes, a dear friend of mine and your grandfather's from Twillingate Shore," Ruth told her grandson. "And this is his son, Cody. You've met both of them before several times, but you were only seven or eight years old the last time you and Jesse came out to my house." "Nice to meet you, guys," Logan said respectfully as he shook hands with them. "Man, you look just like Jesse did when we were your age," Cody said as he and Logan shook hands. "Me and Jesse hung out together a lot when you guys would come up to Oregon. I don't know if you remember that or not." Suddenly, it clicked in Logan's mind exactly who this boy was. He remembered this boy very well now, in fact. He actually never expected to see this boy again, but here he was right in front of him. "Oh yeah," Logan said. "Now I remember you. You were the one who helped Jesse lock me up in Grandma's cedar chest the last time we were there." "Cody!" Ruth exclaimed. "Hey, don't blame me," Cody said defensively with his hands in the air. "It was Jesse's idea to lock him up in there. I just went along with it is all." "Ugh, only a natural born Henderson boy would come up with a silly scheme like that," Ruth said, jokingly disgusted by that fact. "Well, you boys are coming to Richard's house for the wake, right?" "Yeah, we'll come over for the wake, but then we need to get going," Jack said. "We have to catch the 7:15 flight back to Oregon." "What're you going back so early for?" Ruth asked. "Oh, Linda and I have to sing a special at the church tomorrow evening, so we have to be back in time for that, you know," Jack said. "That's right. I forgot about that," Ruth said. "When will you be coming back home, Ms. Ruth?" Cody asked her. "Eah, I'm not too sure yet," Ruth said as she ran her finger's through Logan's fine blond hair. "Probably not for a couple of weeks I imagine. I know one thing though; my grandson needs to get himself a haircut sometime soon. He's starting to look like a little hippie boy." "Hey now, I was a hippie boy twenty years ago, you know," Jack said. "Yes, I remember," Ruth said. "And I nagged you about your hair back then too, in case you don't remember that." "Dude, you should see some of the pictures of my dad when he was like my age," Cody said to Logan specifically. "His hair was so long that it pretty much reached his butt." Logan actually chuckled, which was a first for him in over a week now. "Well, my hair's nowhere near that long," Logan pointed out to his grandmother. ---------------------------------- The house was full of people in black. This had never happened before. It was the strangest thing Logan had ever seen, he thought. Logan sauntered through the living room. Grandma was sitting on the couch between Jack and Cody. And there were a few other people in the living room as well. She was telling everyone about the time he and Jesse stayed at her house one summer about three years ago and she caught them hiding different things from their grandpa, such as the remote control, the TV guide, and even his radio. Logan remembered how grouchy his grandpa had been. He passed away two years before, but Logan and Jesse decided they didn't want to go to the funeral. Richard was the only one who went. Logan wasn't quite interested in getting caught up in that conversation, so he moved on towards the den. His father was in there speaking amongst a few of his friends and colleagues, telling them stories as well about different things Jesse had done. Right now, he was telling them the story about how Jesse tried to teach Logan how to play football last summer and ended up tackling Logan too hard, spraining his arm in the process. Everyone was laughing about that, including Logan's dad. Logan continued on his merry way, deciding he didn't want to be a part of any conversation in which everyone was laughing at his expense. Why couldn't his dad just tell them about how well he learned to throw the damn football? He could spiral the ball perfectly. It just didn't go very far was all. Logan moved on into the dining room. Sophia was talking to her daughter, son-in-law, and a few other people Logan didn't quite recognize. Sophia's daughter, Angela, was bragging about how Jesse and Logan did the lawn work for her the last time they came up to Shreveport with Sophia, since her military husband was stationed somewhere overseas for a few months at that time. Logan remembered that. Jesse tried to teach him how to use the grass trimmer. It didn't go over so well though. Finally, Logan's job was reduced to bagging the loose grass and leaves from the ground. Deciding he didn't feel like joining in on any conversations, Logan sneaked through the kitchen towards the back staircase. Cody was in the kitchen filling up his and his father's cups with Coca Cola, but Logan strolled right past him towards the stairs without saying a word. Logan made his way upstairs to Jesse's bedroom. Thankfully, no one was in there. He went into the bedroom and locked the door behind him. For the past few days, he had been sleeping in Jesse's bed with Jesse's blue stuffed monkey. For Logan, this was the only way he could keep that connection with his brother. There was a glass of water on Jesse's nightstand that he had poured the night before the accident. He hadn't drank all of the water. The rest of it still sat in the glass on the nightstand next to the still unopened Butterfingers candy bar. Logan hadn't had the heart to move those items just yet. He grabbed the blue monkey from the dresser, held it tightly to his chest, and then sat down on the side of the bed. Just looking around the disoriented room, Logan could feel Jesse's very essence with him. There was a close-up picture of Jesse and himself at Disney World from last summer stuck on the mirror of his dresser. Jesse was holding Logan in his arms, their cheeks pressed up together. Logan's sunglasses were on top of his head. Both of them were smiling brightly. They had those stupid Mickey Mouse ears on again, which seemed to be an oh-so-original tradition every time they went to Disney World. There were clothes, both dirty and clean, scattered on the floor. Some of the clothes were still on the bed. Logan hadn't moved anything. For the past week, he had been sleeping right next to a stack of Jesse's clean underwear - an assortment of plaid boxers and white Fruit of the Loom briefs. Since Sophia always bought their socks and underwear for them, it was usually a safe bet that Logan and Jesse would be wearing the exact same brands as each other, just different sizes, and Logan didn't wear boxers. Jesse had a half-read book sitting on his nightstand next to the glass of water. The Talisman by Stephen King and Peter Straub. Perhaps I should start reading that one myself, Logan had thought when he saw the book laying on the nightstand. The teenage boy smell was beginning to fade, which really depressed Logan. He understood that eventually, every fiber, molecule, smell, and feel of Jesse would fade away. There was a gentle knock on the door, which actually startled Logan even though it was a gentle knock. "Who is it?" Logan asked. "Uhm, it's Cody," came Cody's instantly recognizable voice from the other side of Jesse's bedroom door. Logan rolled his eyes. Why couldn't people just leave him alone? Logan sighed heavily, stood up from the bed, placed the blue monkey back on the dresser, and moved towards the bedroom door. He opened the door and there stood Cody Haynes. Logan hadn't noticed it earlier, but Cody actually resembled his brother in a strange way. Same physical build, about the same height (except Cody seemed a little taller than Jesse, but not by much), same wavy golden blond hair, same effortlessly tanned skin. Cody was very handsome. Jesse was handsome too, but in a very different way though. Cody's eyes were a deep green color. Jesse's eyes were blue, just like Logan's eyes. There were some undeniable differences, but Logan figured someone could easily mistake Cody as a close family member to either Jesse or himself, since Logan very much resembled a younger version of Jesse. Logan still couldn't believe he was seeing this boy again. "Hey, buddy," Cody said. "I tried your bedroom down the hall and no one was in there. So I thought I'd give this room a try." "Oh," Logan said simply, his voice almost cracking. "Uh, come in." Logan opened the door wider and then Cody entered the bedroom. Logan closed the door and locked it behind him once Cody was inside. Logan stood in front of the door watching Cody saunter through the bedroom, checking the room out for himself. "I suppose this is Jesse's room?" Cody asked as he stopped in front of the dresser, surveying the items on the dresser's surface and the pictures stuck on the mirror. "How'd you guess?" "The monkey tipped it off. Seriously, how long has he had that thing?" "You remember the blue monkey?" "Oh yeah, man. Every time you guys came up to Oregon, he had that damn monkey with him. He never had a name for it though." "He still doesn't have a name for it. All of my stuffed animals had names, but Jesse never named his animals. He said it was retarded to name an inanimate object like it was pet or something." Cody rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that sounds like something Jesse would say," Cody said with a chuckle as he held the blue monkey in his hands. "He sure loved this monkey though, huh?" Logan just nodded in agreement. "I remember you a lot now," Logan said. "You were the one that taught me and Jesse how to fish." "You really remember that?" Cody asked in a surprised tone of voice. "Man, you couldn't have been more than four or five then. I think me and Jesse were about your age now back then." "Yeah," Logan said. "I remember a lot more than that too." "Oh yeah?" "Mmm, yeah, something from the last summer we came out there," Logan said with his arms crossed. "About three years ago, I guess?" "What is it?" Cody asked. Logan sighed deeply and then let the words come out. "I remember seeing you and my brother kissing each other behind the barn." Cody's eyes widened suddenly. The two boys stared at each other in total silence for what seemed like forever. Logan couldn't believe he had just let those words slip. He had never spoken of it out loud to anyone before, not even Jesse, not even to himself really. There was another gentle knock on the door. Then the door opened behind Logan. Sophia stepped into the bedroom. "Hey boys," Sophia said. "Sorry to interrupt you, but Cody, your father's looking for you. He said it's time to go to the airport." "Oh, okay then," Cody said. "Thanks." Sophia smiled, turned around, and left the bedroom, leaving Logan and Cody alone in the bedroom again. Cody, feeling completely dumbstruck, placed Jesse's blue monkey back on the dresser gently and then walked past Logan towards the bedroom door, without another word spoken between the two of them. Cody left the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. Logan was alone in Jesse's bedroom once again. Logan picked up the monkey from the dresser and hugged it tightly again as he made his way to the bed. He lied down on the bed, his head resting on the pillow, the stack of Jesse's underwear within several feet of Logan's face. He felt horrible now for bringing up something like that to Cody; something that was obviously a sensitive subject around him. He had actually almost forgotten that whole scenario from that summer three years ago up until he realized who Cody was at the cemetery. He couldn't believe this was actually happening now. ______________________________________ END OF CHAPTER ONE NEXT: Chapter Two - "The Pocket Watch" _____________________________ Preview of Chapter Two: Logan stood in his empty bedroom, Jesse's blue monkey in his arms, still finding it difficult to imagine his life away from Baton Rouge, away from his friends, away from Sophia, away from everything he knew and loved. He had been dreading this day ever since Jesse died three months ago. Logan would be moving in with his grandmother in Twillingate Shore, Oregon, because Richard's job always required him to be able to travel for business and he said Logan would be better off with his grandmother and the rest of the family in the town he grew up in. -------------- "Logan, I have something for you," Richard said. Logan turned around and met his father's gaze. Logan immediately saw the pocket watch in his dad's hand. He recognized it automatically. Richard handed the pocket watch over to his eleven year old son, hoping this would help smooth things over a little. Logan grasped the pocket watch from his father's hand carefully, initially surprised at the heaviness of the trinket. Logan unhooked the clasp of the pocket watch and opened it up. His eyes widened as soon as he saw what was inside. The watch had been taken out. It was replaced with a little piece of glass that had a small picture inside; the artistic picture that had stirred up a whole controversy amongst the family, but was somehow always Logan's favorite picture. _____________________________