The following contains scenes of sexual activity between males. If it is illegal for you to read this in your jurisdiction or if you feel you may be offended by doing so, please read no further. The characters portrayed in this story may engage in behaviors that would today be considered unwise and unsafe. The author does not encourage such behavior: nor does he condone the violation of any laws. Please respect yourself and your partners. Please do not copy or distribute this story without the knowledge or permission of the author.
    This story contains some elements of a previous story of mine, The Secrets of Waldo. If you would like to read other works by me, go to the Nifty Home Page and click on the FreeThinker link under  Prolific Authors All characters in the story are fictional and any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. This is fiction and a fantasy. It did not happen.
    Any use of racial epithets is not intended to be offensive in any way, but is used to show the state of mind of the character using them. The author rejects all forms of bigotry and racism, as the story will show.

    I would like to know what you think. If you have any comments or suggestions, please email them to my address: chriswriter@, (this is not a hyperlink). Thank you so much for reading my story and for the wonderful support you have given me over the last three years. I also wish to thank Bill L. for his invaluable advice and assistance and Terry V., Terry F., Dennis, Frank, Gulfman, Freedom, James, Douglas, Gerald, EleCivil, and Jeremy for your support and encouragement. You have kept me writing! Thanks!

Courage and Passion
By FreeThinker

“The school-boy, above all others, is not the simple being the world imagines. In that young bosom, are often stirring passions as strong as our own, desires not less violent, a volition not less supreme. In that young bosom, what burning love, what intense ambition, what avarice, what lust of power, envy that fiends might emulate, hate that men might fear.”
Benjamin Disraeli, British Prime Minister and novelist, Coningsby, 1844

Chapter Five
In Which Love is Found and a Bond Forged

"What's the suitcase for?"
    "It's not a suitcase. It's an overnight bag."
    Ethan was leaning against the edge of Robby's desk watching as his friend closed the door of his closet and set the small black bag on his bed.
    "Well, same thing. What's it for?"
    "Well, I'm spending the night at your place, aren't I?"
    "Well, yeah. But, what do you need an overnight bag for?"
    Robby looked at Ethan as if he were dense.
    "Well, for my pajamas and stuff."
    "Pajamas? What do you need them for?"
    "Well, to sleep in. Are you on drugs?"
    Ethan raised an eyebrow and shook his head as Robby opened his dresser and withdrew a pair of blue pajamas. He then went back to the closet, pulled a navy robe off a hanger and picked up some slippers from the floor. Ethan watched with amusement as he placed the night clothes in the bag.
    "I gotta go get my toothbrush and toothpaste," Robby declared as he hurried from the room. When he returned, Ethan had crossed his arms and was grinning.
    "What?" Robby asked uncertainly.
    Ethan smiled and shook his head.
    "It's going to be fun working on you."
    "What do you mean, 'work on me?'" Robby asked as he closed the bag.
    "You're my new project."
    Robby raised a suspicious eyebrow, but picked up his bag and headed for the door. Ethan followed with his  violin, backpack, and grin.
    As they were descending the stairs, the irritable barking of his mother became audible as she gave orders to his siblings and the babysitter prior to her leaving for her night out.
    "Now, if you give Mrs. Pinkston any trouble, I’ll whip your asses when I get home! You understand?"
    Robby wanted to die with embarrassment. That Ethan, his new friend, should hear his mother speaking in such a way, that Mrs. Pinkston, a sweet elderly lady, should hear it, was almost more than he could take. However, it was nothing compared to the mortification he felt when he reached the foyer and saw her standing in the living room.
    She was dressed like a go-go girl in a sky blue miniskirt with tan knee-high boots. Mrs. Pinkston was seated primly in a chair, obviously biting her tongue while Brian and Megan lay on the floor before the television as the Huntley-Brinkley Report came on.
    "I don't wanna watch the news!" Brian wailed.
    "There's nothing else on right now," his mother spat, "so go to your room and don't cause any trouble."
    She turned and saw Robby's horrified face.
    "What's the matter with you?"
    Robby couldn't speak.
    "Look," she said softly but angrily, "I told you not to judge me. This is my life. I deserve to get out and have a break from all this."
    She waived her arm dismissively as she said, "this."
    Robby simply swallowed and remained quiet. His mother looked suspiciously at Ethan again and said to her son, "Don't do drugs or I'll slap you into tomorrow!"
    With that, she grabbed her bag and marched out the front door as Robby silently prayed that none of the neighbors were outside. He looked up at Mrs. Pinkston, who smiled sadly at him. He walked forward and pulled a small piece of paper from his shirt pocket.
    "Hi, Mrs. Pinkston," he said, barely able to speak. "Here's the number at Ethan's."
    "Thank you, Robby," she said as she took the paper and squeezed his arm. "You have a nice time at your friend's house tonight. You're a good boy."
    "Thank you."
    He turned and walked to the foyer where Ethan was waiting.
    "Is she gone?" he asked.
    "I think I just heard the car pull out of the driveway," Ethan replied.
    Robby looked down at the floor in shame and said, "OK. Let's go."
    Ethan put a hand on his shoulder as they walked to the door.
    "Hey, man. Don't let it get you down. Man, you should see some of the stuff I saw when we lived with Dad. Your Mom was nothing compared to some of the people in The Village."
    "Yeah, well, she's my Mom. She's not supposed to do that. She's not supposed to dress like that and go out and get drunk and meet men. She's supposed to stay home and do what she did when Dad was alive."
    They were walking across the grass to the sidewalk and toward the school.
    "Well, you know," said Ethan, "women don't really have to stay home. I mean, they have lives like everyone else."
    "Well, yeah, I know all about Women's Lib and all that and if Mom wants a job, that's cool. I wish she would get a job. But, I mean, dressing like she does and carrying on like she does. It's just not right. It's just not right."
    His voice faded as he said the last words and he fought to keep the tears from his eyes and his voice.
    Ethan remained silent as they walked, carefully stepping over the raised crack in the sidewalk that always seemed to jump up at Robby.
    "I just want everything to go back to the way it was."
    They came to the corner in front of the school. Taking a deep breath and forcing a smile on his face, Robby pointed to the quaint brick house across Sycamore and said, "Sean lives there."
    "Really?" Ethan replied as they turned to the west and began walking up 18th St. "It looks like the kind of place Sean would live in."
    Robby grinned.
    "You know, he's really OK. He's really quiet and shy and kind of wimpy, but, he's really a nice guy."
    "I know. I think we need to really try to be his friend. I don't think he's ever had a friend. Maybe if we become his friends then he won't be shy and everything and people won't tease him so much."
    "Well, it would help if he didn't pop a boner in the shower everyday, too," said Robby with a grin and a thrill at saying something nasty and, he felt, grown up. Ethan grinned.
    "Yeah, you're probably right. But, he can't help it. It's just something that happens to guys when we're going through puberty."
    "What's puberty?"
    They were approaching Zhenya's house and, as Ethan was about to reply, they saw a red Volkswagen, shiny and new, pulling out of the driveway, with Zhenya in the passenger's seat, Ian in the back, and Dr. Koronov behind the wheel. Zhenya grinned and waived as the Beetle pulled into the street. The boys waived back, but Robby noticed a look of longing on Zhenya's face as the car speed away to the west.
    "I think Zhenya wanted to come over tonight and spend the night, too," Robby commented.
    "That would be cool," Ethan said. "Maybe I should invite him some time."
    They came to the stop sign on the corner and crossed Richmond.
    "Say, you know a lot about stuff, I guess," said Robby. "Can I ask you a weird question?"
    "Sure," Ethan said grinning. "The weirder the better!" 
    Robby giggled and then, blushing, asked, "I, um, accidentally saw Zhenya's dick in the shower, today and.... well, it looks deformed."
    Ethan started chuckling. Robby suddenly felt defensive.
    "Hey! You said I could ask a weird question."
    "It's OK," said Ethan. "It's sort of like that question Zhenya asked you yesterday about if everyone in America was Jewish."
    Robby looked at Ethan as if he had taken leave of his senses.
    Ethan grinned again.
    "Son, I think it's time you and I had a little talk."
    "Uh, oh," said Robby. "It's one of those things."
    Ethan nodded.
    "You and I are circumcised. They cut off the foreskin over the heads of our dicks when we were babies. Americans  do that a lot. Man, my Dad was really torqued when they did that to me. Jewish people do that, too. It's part of their religion. But, people outside the United States usually don't do that. That's why Zhenya's dick looked so funny. Was the foreskin hanging down over the head or just covering it?"
    Robby was conflicted. He felt guilty talking about such things with Ethan. Yet, there was an illicit thrill in doing so.
    "Well, there was this long tube at the end."
    Ethan nodded, as if this confirmed something he was thinking.
    "Zhenya probably doesn't get boners as much as we do," he said. Robby looked at Ethan in surprise, but before he could say anything, Ethan added, "He probably doesn't beat-off as much as we do, either."
    "Beat-off. You know."
    Ethan demonstrated forming a tube with his right hand and pumping in the air. Robby's eyes grew wide. Ethan looked at his friend in surprise.
    "Don't you beat-off? You get boners enough."
    "How do you know how many boners I get?" he demanded as they came to Providence Avenue.
    "It's rush hour," said Ethan watching the heavy traffic in both directions. "We might have to go up to 15th and cross with the light."
    "Naw, we can cross in a minute when the light changes up there. Now answer the question. How come you know how much I get a boner?"
    Ethan grinned.
    "Man, you get 'em all the time. I can tell."
    "What are you doing looking at my pants?" Robby demanded. He was both angry and embarrassed now and not at all certain he wanted to spend the night, and even more convinced that he did.
    "Hey, don't get all torqued and stuff. I mean, everybody pops a bone once in awhile. I mean, it's natural. It just happens. I just notice when people do. It's not like everyone knows when you do 'cause you do a good job of hiding it when you do. But, I can tell."
    "Go!" Robby yelled suddenly and the two boys sprinted quickly across the street, causing a car to hit its brakes and honk angrily as they reached the other side. Ethan grinned and waived at the cursing driver. They proceeded along the walkway lining the chain-link fence around Lake Windermere, the evening sun descending behind the trees to the west.
    "In fact," said Ethan with a grin, as Robby cringed, knowing what was coming, "you have one now."
    Automatically, Robby moved his overnight bag to the front to cover his crotch. Ethan chuckled as he blushed.
    "Don't worry. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. I get them all the time, too. In fact, I've got one now, too."
    Without thinking, Robby looked and, sure enough, there was a very noticeable inflation in Ethan's crotch, fat and pointing to the left. Ethan chuckled.
    "Sean gets them a lot, too," Ethan added.
    "Yeah, I know," said Robby. "He got another one in the shower today."
    Ethan frowned, knowing what must have happened.
    "How come everyone laughs when Zac pops a boner, but when Sean does, they all jump all over him and make him feel like a freak?"
    "Because Zac is cool and Sean isn't. They all look at Zac as a clown. Besides, it's the way Zac acts. He doesn't care. He's just Zac. In fact, 'cause he likes to show it off, that takes away... well, the fagginess of getting hard in the shower."
    "Yeah. People think that if you pop in the shower, you're queer or something."
    "So 'fag' is another word for 'queer.'"
    Ethan nodded.
    "It's like 'nigger' or 'gook.' It's really insulting. I hate the word."
    They were rounding a curve in the walkway and passing an elderly couple out walking their pug. Once they were safely out of hearing range, Robby asked, "So, is it like faggy or queer... "
    He stopped the question and, as they walked, grew pensive.
    Robby shook his head.
    "Never mind."
    They walked on until they came to the western end of the lake. Ethan began walking across the grassy area on the west side toward the southwest. He pointed to a narrow, expensive looking two story house among several narrow, expensive looking two stories, all closely bunched together.
    "That's our house."
    "Looks nice," said Robby. "If you're such a hippy, though, how come y'all live in such a nice place?"
    Ethan grinned and said, "I'm not really a hippy. I'm just me. Besides, my Dad makes a lot of money from his books and Mom makes a lot of money from being a lawyer."
    "But, I thought people like you didn't like money."
    Ethan chuckled.
    "We love money. Well, my parents love money. But, Dad donates a lot of his money to a shelter for runaways in The Village and Mom, well, she does a lot of pro bono work."
    Robby stopped dead in his tracks as Ethan crossed 19th St toward his driveway.
    "Pro boner? It's illegal to get a boner?"
    Ethan laughed so hard, he had to lean against the wrought iron gate before the brick steps leading up the slope to the house.
    "Not 'boner.' Bono. It's Latin. It means 'good.' She helps a lot of poor people and special causes and stuff. Her other work pays for her special work."
    As they climbed the steps past what looked like oriental bushes and vines toward the front door, Robby was impressed. Entering the front door, he was surprised. The front room was filled with expensive looking antiques and furniture. It was not the hippy commune he had anticipated.
    "There you are."
    A teenage girl in a short shirt and tight pullover was approaching along a hallway from the back. She looked very much like Ethan, same face almost and same hair pulled back in a ponytail, though hers was a bit redder than Ethan's. She looked like she was fifteen or sixteen.
    "Mom's already left for dinner. She left pizza in the kitchen. Chad and I are going out, but we're gonna be back around nine, so give us the living room, OK?"
    "No problem," said Ethan.
    "Who's your friend?" she asked as she passed. Robby felt uncomfortable as she seemed to look him up and down. He perfume was nice, as well as something else. He wasn't sure what, but the funny feelings inside him suddenly grew. He realized she was hot, like Ethan. God, he was so weird.
    "This is Robby. Robby, this is Allison."
    "Pleased to meet you," Robby said with a polite smile. Allison raised an eyebrow.
    "Well, a Southern gentleman. And, cute."
    "Hands off," said Ethan as he headed back to the kitchen. "He's mine."
    Robby was blushing fiercely, wondering just what the heck Ethan meant. Allison had changed directions and was following them back, a strange smile on her face.
    "That's OK. He's too young for me anyway. Where are you from, Robby?"
    "Um, Texas," he replied, suddenly feeling tongue-tied.
    ""Oooh," she replied with distaste.
    "Don't worry," said Ethan, dropping his backpack and violin beside the kitchen table. "He's from Austin."
    "Oh, well, OK."
    Robby was about to ask why that would make being from Texas OK, and why there was a problem with being from Texas, when Ethan added, "His father was Patrick McDonnell."
    "Oh, the guy who wrote that stuff Dad was raving about last year when he was in the hospital?"
    Ethan nodded as he pulled a couple of plates from the cabinet.
    "Your Dad was in the hospital?"
    "Yeah," replied Ethan as he pulled a couple of glasses from the cabinet. "He got beat-up at the Chicago riots. Me and Mom did, too."
    "You were in the riots? I thought you believed in non-violence?"
    "I do. That's why. Riots don't accomplish anything. They just let you vent your anger. There's better ways to vent your anger."
    The doorbell rang and Allison hurried out of the kitchen, but not before giving Robby a wink. He felt his face flush and his dick twitch. He dropped his overnight bag on the floor as Ethan poured them a couple of Cokes and he sat down.
    "Like what?"
    Ethan slapped slices of pizza on their plates and sat down.
    "Like civil disobedience. That's how Gandhi was able to make the British leave India."
    "Oh, yeah," Robby replied, his mouth full. "You think that would work with my Mom? Maybe I could make her quit acting like a whore."
    Ethan frowned.
    "It might be better if you’d just accept the fact your Mom is like that and quit getting angry."
    "You think its OK?"
    Ethan shook his head as he bit more pizza.
    "No, but she's her and you're you. You got a lot of anger. You're dad's dead in an unjust war, your life's all different now. You don't like your Mom's life. The kids at school torque you off. You need to learn to chill out."
    Robby started to retort angrily when Ethan grinned.
    "See? Since you're my new friend, I'm going to do you a favor and show you a couple of ways to relax and let go of your anger."
    Fifteen minutes later, the two boys were upstairs in Ethan's room, Robby looking around in interest, Ethan setting his backpack and violin in the corner and Robby's overnight bag behind an old easy chair in the corner. Robby was looking at the large old-fashioned bed. On the wall behind it was a large poster for The Who. To the right, a poster announcing an anti-war rally at Columbia University a year before. On another wall was a rather amateurish painting of a dove flying over a garden. Underneath that was a component stereo. Robby's eyes grew wide as he dropped to his knees before it, as if worshiping a holy relic.
    "Wow, this is so cool!" he exclaimed. Ethan shrugged.
    "It's no big deal. I could live without it."
    "Hey, I'll be glad to take it if you don't want it. Let's play some music."
    "In a minute. Take your shoes off and sit down."
    Ethan took a large, thick candle from a shelf in the corner and set it in the center of the floor. He struck a match and lit it. The evening light was almost gone outside the window overlooking the lake and the park as he closed the curtains. The room was dark except for the golden light of the candle. Ethan gestured for Robby to sit. The two boys sat before the candle, Robby removing his loafers, Ethan his sandals.
    "Cross your legs and put your hands on your knees like this."
    Feeling ridiculously stupid, (yet noticing something illicit underneath), Robby followed Ethan's instructions and looked at his friend. Suddenly he felt an enormous shock. Ethan was only a couple of feet away from him, sitting in the same position, his face bathed in the golden glow of the candle. Robby looked at Ethan's face and felt... intense. He could think of no other word. He was beautiful. His clear skin, his high cheekbones, his long, thin eyebrows, the way they arched downward as they approached his ears, the dark blond hair pulled back, the thin and almost feminine lips, the peaceful, serene look on his face. All combined to take Robby's breath away. He literally wasn't breathing as he looked at Ethan. His mouth parted as he gazed.
    Ethan was watching Robby, looking curiously and, then, a smile grew on his face.
    The boy was startled and quickly he looked down at the candle in shame.
    "Hey, what's wrong?"
    "Um, nothing. Nothing. So what so you want me to do now?"
    Ethan's smile grew.
    "I want you to relax and look at me."
    Robby was fiercely hard and his hands were tightly gripping his knees; otherwise, they would have been trembling. He looked up and his eyes met the those of his friend.
    "Relax," Ethan said softly. His words, however, had the opposite effect on Robby. The soft, breathy voice was like adding fuel to the fire in Robby's heart. His breathing was ragged.
    "Relax," Ethan almost whispered. "Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Relax. Think of nothing. Clear your mind. Think of nothing. Nothing. Nothing."
    That was easy for you to say, Robby thought. All he could think of was how beautiful Ethan was, how hard his own dick was, and how much he wanted to lean over and kiss Ethan.
    Oh, my god! he thought. I want to kiss Ethan!
    In shock his eyes opened and he looked in surprise at his friend. Ethan's eyes were closed, his golden face, so beautiful, so angelic, so peaceful, was dominated by the relaxed smile on the boys lips.
    "Nothing. Nothing. Your breathing is slowing. Slow your breathing. Slow. Nothing. Slow. Relax. Your heart is slowing. Slow. Nothing. Slow."
    Robby clandestinely watched Ethan, his eyes gazing at the long and slender arms in the short sleeves of his yellow pullover, almost hairless and softly tanned. A breeze from the slightly open window caused the flame of the candle to flicker and the arms seemed to breath, to come alive. Robby looked up at Ethan's face as the flame stabilized and the flickering ceased.
    "Peace. Think of peace. Let all the rage and anger flow away from your body and your mind. Let it go. Let all the rage and anger go. Peace. Peace."
    Ethan's soft, musical voice was almost hypnotic. In spite of the desire raging inside him, he did feel relaxed and at peace. Sitting here in the dark and quiet of his room, alone with, he had to admit, the most beautiful boy he had ever seen, bathed in the warm glow of the candle before them, Robby felt a serenity, yes, a serenity, he had never known. This was... this was just right. This was... right.
    "You're at peace," Ethan breathed. "Peace. Your father's at peace. Let him go. Embrace him. Let him go. Embrace him. Celebrate your father's memory. He's at peace. He wants you to be at peace. Release all the pain and anger. Let it all flow out of your body, let it flow to the candle to be consumed in the fire and burn away. Imagine your anger and pain all flowing down out of your body and through the candle to the flame."
    Robby did. Gazing at Ethan, he saw the ugliness of his anger flowing out of his body like pollution, like a cancer, and flowing across the floor to the candle. It rose up the taper and was consumed in the flame, burning away in the faint smoke that rose into the air above their heads.
    Ethan became silent and Robby gazed peacefully at him, feeling a tranquility completely foreign. This was the perfect moment. Just perfect.
    He could not guess how long they sat there silent and peaceful, Ethan's eyes closed, Robby gazing at the serene smile on the boy's face. That smile became for Robby the object of his meditation. As Ethan focused his mind on peace, on nothing, Robby focused on Ethan's lips, on his beautiful smile. In the distant background, the sounds of the city, of traffic on Providence, of an ambulance siren beyond, a jet passing overhead seemed like simple white noise, adding to the peace in the room.
    Finally, Robby saw Ethan's chest begin to rise. He was breathing deeper. Robby looked up and saw his eyes slowly open. Their eyes met and Ethan's smile grew. It looks like the smile of God, Robby thought poetically, not feeling silly at all in thinking it.
    For a long moment, the two simply looked at each other, saying nothing, their eyes locked on the others, Robby's on Ethan's blue, Ethan on Robby's hazel. Robby felt as if Ethan were gazing inside him, roaming freely though his mind and soul, sharing his inner most thoughts and fears and feelings and desires. Robby wanted him to. Robby invited him to, opened the doors as Ethan roamed.
    Finally, Ethan took a deep breath and their gaze broke. Ethan's arms relaxed and fell to rest on his thighs. He took another deep breath and gave a full, toothy, smile to Robby.
    "How do you feel?" he asked in the same soft, breathy voice.
    Robby's head leaned slightly to the right, as he often did when thinking. His eyes looked down at the flame of the candle and a happy smile came over his face.
    "I feel... I don't know. I feel so... overwhelmed... I... I don't know how I feel."
    "The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. I think you've just taken several. Let's take a few more."
    Robby smiled. Ethan turned and leaned over to the cabinet beside his bed, opened a door, and removed a second candle. Turning back, he lit the second from the first, moving the first to the left and setting the second on the right. The two were now bathed in the glow of the two candles from both sides. Ethan returned his gaze to Robby, who felt a renewed surge of desire and... love, yes, love as he saw his friend in a new light, both physically and metaphorically.
    Ethan sat for a moment, smiling at Robby, before be reached down and grasped the bottom of his shirt. Slowly, his slim arms pulled it up, obscuring his face, but revealing first his smooth stomach, then, his ribs and, eventually, the round pennies of his nipples. He pulled it up and over his head and as it cleared his face, his ponytail fell over his bare back. Once again, he rested his arms on his thighs and smiled at Robby the boy's eyes were flowing over Ethan's torso, loving the sight of his slender chest, the ribs just barely visible, the round copper brown of his nipples. Robby had never seriously looked at nipples before, but Ethan's... they were... well, beautiful was the only word he could think of.
    "Take your shirt off."
    Ethan's soft words, like honey flowing over him, awoke him. He no longer felt embarrassed to be found looking at Ethan in such a way. He knew that Ethan knew what was in his mind, his soul. Ethan knew him. There was nothing left to hide.
   Knowing what was happening, afraid yet not fearing, Robby unbuttoned his shirt, his fingers trembling, yet more in control than ever, started at the top and slowly worked their way down until his shirt fell open. Slowly, he slipped it off his shoulders and let it fall to the floor, revealing his own slightly muscled arms and chest. He watched as it was now Ethan's turn to gaze up and down Robby's body. When their eyes met again, Ethan's smile grew. Robby took a breath.
    "Have you... ever... done..."
    He couldn't finish his question because he wasn't certain exactly certain what he was asking.
    Ethan nodded and Robby felt a pang.
    "Yes, but it doesn't really count. It wasn't right."
    "What do you mean?"
    Ethan looked to his right at the new candle and paused a moment before replying.
    "He was a student in one of my father's classes. He said he loved me and that I was beautiful, but I knew he just wanted to do it. He didn't really mean it. I did it anyway because I wanted to know what it was like."
    He was silent for a moment and, for the first time, Robby saw.... pain in Ethan's eyes as his friend looked at the candle.
    "What did you do?" he asked softly. Ethan simply looked at the candle before speaking again.
    "When it was over, he took a shower and got dressed and left. He didn't even say good-bye."
    Robby saw Ethan's eyes grow moist. He felt a sudden urge to scoot over and put his arms around him, but before he could, Ethan suddenly sat upright, closed his eyes and rested his hands on his knees. Robby watched as the boy's breathing slowed. He waited as Ethan meditated, gazing with love at his friend, wanting to hold him, but knowing he needed this moment to himself.
    Eventually Ethan breathed deeply and opened his eyes, meeting Robby's. They both smiled.
    "It was last spring. In fact, it was one of the reasons my parents got a divorce. Since then, I've read a lot about philosophy and religion and things like that. I was looking through some of my Dad's books and found The Great Dialogues of Plato."
    "You're eleven and you read Plato?"
    Ethan grinned.
    "I'm twelve, but, yeah. I was just going through the books and thought I'd look at it. I opened it up to The Symposium and saw something about true love and men. Plato thought that the Gods separated men into two parts and that love is when the two parts come back together. I thought that was way cool and I decided I wanted to find my other half. Maybe I won't ever find the other half, but maybe I can find an other half and it will become the other half. Or maybe not. Maybe I will find what I'm looking for in this life and my journey will end. Or maybe, I won't and I'll have to come back and look some more. Anyway, it doesn't matter. You never know until you try. The goal is not the destination, but the journey."
    Robby was stunned. He stared at his friend in amazement.
    "You're so... wise, so, I don't know."
    Ethan grinned and scooted forward, his knees meeting Robby's. Slowly, he raised his arms and took Robby's face in his hands. Robby closed his eyes and felt his body tremble at Ethan's touch as his friend's hands slowly caressed and explored his face, his thumbs following Robby's eyebrows, the palms of his hands sliding softly across his cheeks, his fingers twining in the soft red hair. Robby took a deep breath, his dick straining in his pants, his heart beating like a drum. He opened his eyes and raised his hands to Ethan's face, touching his friend, really touching his friend for the first time. He ran his fingers over the smooth soft skin of his cheeks, ran them down the long nose, around the thin lips, up and around the cheekbones, along his thin eyebrows.
    Then, the moment came, the moment Robby had thought of the night before as he lay in bed and rubbed himself to dreams of Ethan. Ethan leaned over closed his eyes. Their lips touched. Robby felt a shock through his body. It wasn't really a kiss, yet. Their lips just touched. Robby could smell the sweet breath of his friend, feel the moist warmth of his breath on his upper lip.
    And, then, they were kissing.
    Ethan's hands pulled Robby's head forward, their mouths uniting tightly. Robby moaned. Ethan groaned. The two breathed deeply of the other and their lips pulled and loved each others'. Their hands continued to caress the other's face as they held each other tightly.
    For long, loving minutes they kissed until Ethan released his hold on Robby's head and pulled back. His lips parted and he was panting, his face flushed, as he looked up at Robby, whose face was as red as his hair.
    "Wow," was all Robby could say. Ethan giggled and then gave Robby a grin.
    "Take your pants off."
    Robby breathing was ragged after the long bout of kissing and he was almost dizzy. He swallowed, almost unable to move. Taking a deep breath, he whispered, "OK."
    Ethan's eyes were on Robby's as he leaned back and stretched his legs out to Robby's left. He unfastened the belt and the snap and then slowly lowered his zipper. Robby could see the long, thick rise in Ethan's crotch and he froze, leaning back, his own legs to Ethan's left, waiting breathless.
    The flaps of Ethan's crotch opened, revealing the white cloth of Ethan's briefs; and, then, Ethan stopped.
    "I thought you were going to take yours off, too?"
    As if waking suddenly, Robby looked up at his grinning friend and smiled sheepishly.
    "Sorry," he responded as he quickly unfastened his belt and snap. He opened his pants and hooked his thumbs inside both his pants and his briefs. He looked up at Ethan and the two pulled their pants down at the same time, rocking back and forth on their butts as they lowered them. They kicked their pants away and then returned to sitting cross-legged in front of each other; only now, they were completely naked.
    Neither said a word as both of them gazed in awe at the other's erection. Robby held his breath as he looked at, what seemed to him to be, Ethan’s enormous boner. It must have been between four and five inches long, standing upward, bobbing rigidly with Ethan’s heartbeat. Beneath it were Ethan’s balls, big, like bird eggs, and tightly hugging the base of his dick in a pink, slightly wrinkled sack. However, it was his dick that fascinated Robby and he gazed at it with longing, no longer afraid or ashamed to look.
    “Do you like it?” Ethan asked softly, his honeyed voice so exquisite to Robby, who could barely respond.
    “It’s beautiful.”
    Ethan paused a moment and, then, replied, “Thank you.”
    Robby looked up. Ethan gave him a smile that seemed different this time, that seemed to be conveying a message, as if he wanted Robby’s approval and admiration, as if his thoughts and feelings were important.
    Robby’s own boner was pointing vertically and bobbing just as stiffly as Ethan’s. Robby realized that it was such an exciting feeling to be naked and for his boner to be out in the open for Ethan to see. It seemed to make it even harder knowing that Ethan was looking at it.
    “Close your eyes,” said Ethan softly. The sound of his voice made Robby’s dick jump. He did as Ethan said, also resting his hands on his knees, which were just inches from Ethan’s.
    “Think about your cock,” he said. Robby had never heard his dick referred  to as a cock before. It sounded so different, so exciting, so nasty. Cock. Cock. Just thinking the word made him excited.
    “Think about how hard it is. How so very, very hard it is. Focus on your cock. How good it feels to be hard and naked and horny.”
    Horny. This was a new word. Instinctively, he knew what it meant. Horny. Yeah, he was horny. He was very horny, hornier than he had ever been.
    “Think about how intense you feel, how much you need your cock to feel good.”
    Robby was. He was trembling. Despite the grip on his knees, his hands were shaking so badly that he could feel it in his arms. His whole body was shaking, he was so excited, so… horny.
    Suddenly, Robby cried out. He opened his eyes and found Ethan leaning forward, his right arm extended and his hand wrapped around Robby’s rigid three inches. He was holding it gently, not moving, not rubbing. He was merely holding it and it was the best feeling Robby had ever had. His hand felt so warm, so… different. It felt so much better than his own hand.
    Robby was moaning, fighting the urge to thrust his hips forward.
    “Oh, Ethan, rub my dick. Please, rub it.”
    Slowly, Ethan tightened his grip on the rigid boy cock and Robby cried out again.
    It was almost a grunt. Robby watched as Ethan’s left hand moved forward. He watched, open-mouthed as it reached underneath his cock and cupped his small, tight balls. He cried out again, this time throwing his head back and closing his eyes in ecstasy.
    Ethan was squeezing his dick and fondling his balls and Robby was in Heaven. This time, he did thrust his hips up. He braced himself from behind with his hands and pushed his hips upward toward Ethan’s face, his butt lifting up into the air several inches. Robby watched with his mouth open, breathing heavily between clenched teeth.
    The feeling in his dick was growing and growing, moving into that area deep inside him and behind his dick. Soon, he was going to explode. He was losing his mind, it felt so good.
    “Robby,’ Ethan breathed. “Feel me.”
    Robby opened his eyes and saw Ethan breathing through clenched teeth, as well, his eyes boring into him, his beautiful dark lashes fluttering as he quickly blinked.
    “Feel me,” he repeated, the urgency dripping from his voice. Robby knew was going to. He had to. He had to feel Ethan. There was nothing he wanted more at that moment in life than to feel Ethan Spencer’s cock.
    He leaned forward and rested his butt on the carpet. His eyes locked on Ethan’s for a moment, he felt the need in the boy in front of him. He looked down. The cock was so very hard, so very rigid, pointing straight up, throbbing before him. He looked at the slit at the top of the head and saw a drop of thick, clear liquid. It looked like the liquid that would shoot out of Robby’s dick during the explosion. Was Ethan about to explode? Robby hoped so, because he sure felt as if he were about to.
    Robby reached forward and grasped Ethan’s rigid cock with the tips of his fingers, pulling it outward toward him.  He heard the rapid intake of breath and felt the sudden stiffening of Ethan’s cock as his fingers held it away from Ethan’s body. Ethan’s grip on his Robby’s cock tightened, causing him to groan as the feelings seemed to skyrocket through his body. He had an almost uncontrollable urge to thrust his hips forward as Ethan squeezed his cock.
    Robby looked hungrily at Ethan’s boner, at the creamy white shaft, the red circle and the pink skin beneath the stiff, hard helmet at the end. There were several very short, very fine dark hairs at the base.
    “You have hair,” Robby said.
    “Yeah,” Ethan panted. “You probably will too in a few months. Now, quit talking and rub my cock..”
    Ethan grinned at Robby and, to make his point, started pumping his friend’s boner. Robby gasped and threw his head back.
    “Ah, gawww, oh, gawwww.”
    He copied Ethan’s actions and pumped his friend’s cock. Ethan hissed through clenched teeth.
    “Nnnng, Nnnng, Nnnng.”
    Suddenly, the feelings in Robby became unbearable. With a loud cry, his face scrunched and he exploded. His body jerked and spasmed as he whimpered. And, then, as quickly as it hit, it ended.
    Painfully, he knocked Ethan’s hand away from his hypersensitive dick as he panted, trying to catch his breath. He realized he had stopped pumping Ethan and was merely holding the boner. His eyes met his friend’s and Ethan grinned. He held his hand up to his face and examined the clear liquid coating his thumb and index finger. And, then, he did something that shocked Robby. He licked it.
    Robby’s eyes grew wide with shock. Ethan simply grinned, pushed Robby’s motionless hand away from his cock, wrapped his own fist around it, and began to furiously pump himself.
    Robby watched as he closed his eyes, breathing out of his mouth, his head rolling side to side. Ethan reached out with his left hand and grasped Robby’s still rigid boner and held it. Robby flinched from the intense sensitivity of his cock, but he knew Ethan needed to hold it.
    Ethan began to make the “nnng” sounds again, his voice rising and even squeaking as he maniacally pumped his boner. And, then, Robby watched in fascination as Ethan had his own explosion. Ethan was working his hips around, his body and shoulders rocking, his head jerking back and forth, and… cream was shooting from his cock! Clear liquid would ooze from Robby’s when he had his explosions, but almost white, creamy goo shot out of Ethan’s and landed on his chest and stomach and legs, coating his pumping hand as the boy moaned through his explosion.
    Soon, Ethan relaxed and, panting, his hand stopped pumping. He held his boner as he gazed down at it in exhaustion, cream coating his right hand.
    “Wow,” was all Robby could say as he looked at his friend in amazement. “Wow.”
    Ethan looked up and grinned.
    “That was great. We’ve got to do that again.”
    “What’s that stuff?” Robby asked, pointing to a streak of cream on the smooth inside of Ethan’s right thigh. Ethan smiled.
    “That’s sperm, or cum. That’s what make babies when you have intercourse with a girl.”
    “How come it’s all white?”
    “Well, that’s the sperm cells in the liquid. Yours’ll turn white soon, too.”
    Robby nodded and, still slightly flushed and tired, smiled at his friend. Ethan reach behind him to the Kleenex box on the nightstand and took several tissues. He wiped his himself clean and, then, after tossing the tissues into the wastebasket, scooted forward, wrapping his legs around Robby’s hips.
    Robby figured out what Ethan was doing and did the same. Thus, sitting front to front, the two boys heads fell forward, foreheads resting against each other. Ethan took Robby’s hands in his and squeezed them. Robby felt that the world was perfect.
    “You are so cool, Ethan. You are so cool.”
    “Thanks,” Ethan breathed. “You’re cool, too. I’m glad you gave me a chance.”
    For the longest moment, the two sat together, their heads resting against the other, their hands clasped, their eyes looking downward at the twin rigid boners still rising between the two.
    A car door slamming in the driveway below, awoke the two. Ethan looked toward the window and whispered, “Allison’s home.”
    “Do we need to get dressed?” Robby asked nervously. Ethan grinned and shook his head.
    “They’re more afraid of us than we are of them.”
    Robby giggled and put his arms around Ethan. He held the boy tight, their heads resting on each other’s shoulders. Just the previous Monday, he thought the boy in his arms a freak. Now, at that moment, he was the best thing in Robby’s life.
    After a long moment, he pulled his head back. Ethan raised his and their eyes met.
    “Thanks, Ethan.”
    His friend simply smiled, that peaceful, serene, infuriating, lovable smile.
    “You’re a cool friend.”
    “Well, I try,” Ethan whispered in Robby’s ear. His hands were gently running up and down Robby’s back. His warm breath in Robby’s ear and on his neck made him shiver.
    “Yes,” he whispered in Robby’s hair.
    “I want you to know that I’m not doing it with you ‘cause you’re cute. I’m not like that guy from your dad’s class.”
    “I know.”
    Robby paused.
    “I’d do it with you even if you weren’t cute. I think you’re really special and…”
    Robby was getting embarrassed. He wasn’t accustomed to saying things such as this to another guy. He bit his lip and looked down at Ethan’s smooth, tanned shoulder, glowing so warmly in the candle light.
    “I’m glad we’re friends.”
    Ethan rested his head against Robby’s and the two boys held each other, their arms and legs entwined, their erections rising stiffly against each other, their breaths warmly caressing the other.
    “Hey,” Ethan whispered as he pulled back. ‘You want to see something cool?” he asked with a naughty grin on his face.
    “What?” Robby asked with a grin of wicked anticipation.
    Ethan put a finger to his lips and untangled himself from his friend. He crawled across the carpet to the door and placed his ear against it. He grinned, rose to his knees, and gestured for Robby to come. Slowly he turned the knob and pulled the door open.
    “What are you doing?” Robby whispered with alarm.
    Ethan waved his hand for silence and stood. Robby followed suit and watched in trepidation as a naked Ethan, his cock still as erect as before and rising upward from his tummy, stepped out into the hallway. He gestured for Robby to follow. The red-head hesitated, but Ethan gestured more emphatically and grinned.
    “Come on,” he mouthed.
    Robby swallowed and, his own boner leading the way, followed Ethan out into the hall.
    It was frightening and, yet, exciting to be naked out in the open in such a dangerous way, knowing there were people downstairs. Were they going to spy on Ethan’s sister and her boyfriend? The sudden thought made Robby smile and brought a twitch to his boner.
    Ethan was tip-toeing down the hall to the top of the stairs. Robby followed, his hands shaking again. As they reached the stairs, Ethan stopped and held out his hand. He listened and then turned to Robby and grinned. Robby came up beside Ethan and listened. It was quiet, but he could hear whispering and… something else. Moaning. It was moaning! The same kind of moaning that had occurred  in Ethan’s room just a few minutes before! They were making out!
    Ethan looked back at Robby and grinned. He leaned forward and listened a moment before taking a step. Robby put a fearful hand his shoulder and mouthed the word, “No.”
    Ethan simply grinned and took two more steps downward.
    Ethan looked back at Robby, stifling a chuckle. Robby smiled uncertainly, but remained where he was as Ethan waived him forward.
    “Come on,” Ethan mouthed.
    Robby bit his lower lip and took a tentative step downward.
    “Come on.”
    Robby froze, but the whisper was coming from the living room.
    “Let me take it off. Yeah. Yeah.”
    Robby saw Ethan stifle a chuckle. As he descended low enough on the stairs to peek down below the ceiling of the foyer, he stopped and dropped to his knees. He motioned Robby downward.
    When he sat beside Ethan, he leaned forward and saw Allison and a teenage boy who must have been “Chad” sitting on the couch. Chad’s back was to them, but Allison was facing them. All she had to do was look up and see could see them crouching on the steps in the darkness. The living room was illuminated only by the blue glow of the street light outside shining through the thin curtains of the window. Allison was naked from the waist up and Chad’s dark-curled head was moving around Allison’s boobies. Robby’s eyes grew wide and his dick lurched.
    Ethan leaned over until their warm bodies were touching. He looked up at Robby and grinned before turning back to watch the spectacle unfolding below. However, as he did, his right hand crept between Robby’s naked legs and began to caress his rigid dick. His fingers moved around the throbbing boner, his thumb sliding across the sensitive tip, his pinky rubbing the smooth sack around Robby’s balls. He smiled as he heard the rapid intake of breath,
    Allison was laying back more, now, and Chad seemed to be really working on her left booby. His left hand was seriously working her right booby and she was moaning softly, continuously. Robby could see her hands seemed to be underneath Chad. Was she feeling his boner?
    Robby felt a serious surge of sexiness as Ethan felt his dick. He wondered what Chad’s dick looked like. Was it big and fat and hard? Did it have lots of hair around it?
    Without realizing what he was doing as he watched the scene below, Robby reached across to Ethan and slid his hand across this friend’s smooth thigh. Ethan’s skin was so soft and warm. Ethan spread his legs wider, giving Robby freedom to do what he wanted. Robby’s fingers slid across to the point where Ethan’s thigh and dick met. The tips of his fingers stopped at the rigid stiffness of the base of Ethan’s dick. He waited a moment as, on the couch, Chad moved to Allison’s right booby. When Allison moaned even loader, Robby moved his hand and cupped Ethan’s balls, so much bigger than his own. Ethan moaned.
    In the silence of the stairway, with the only sounds being Allison’s moans from the couch and the breathing of the two boyish spies, Ethan’s moan seemed like a bullhorn. He froze. Allison suddenly stiffened and jumped.
    “Ethan! You perv!”
    Chad sat up and looked backward with shock.
    “Jeez! He’s naked!”
    “Get out!” Allison screamed.
    Ethan giggled again jumped up, pulling Robby by the dick and ran up the stairs just as they heard the sound of the backdoor slamming. Ethan giggled even more when he heard Allison’s furious, muffled comment, “She’s home, damn it. Where’s my pullover?”
    Robby was appalled that they had been caught and even more frightened that Ethan’s mother was home and they were running naked through the second floor! When they ran into the bedroom and Ethan had closed the door, he leaned against the door frame and cracked up.
    Robby was desperately picking his clothes up off the floor and trying to figure out which leg was which in his pants.
    “You should see yourself!” Ethan guffawed. Robby looked up in a panic.
    “You’re Mom’s home and Allison’s gonna be up here in a minute and we’re naked!”
    “Calm down. Everything’s cool. Mom’s not going to come up here and Allison sure won’t ‘cause she and Chad are too busy trying to get out of getting caught down there. It’s cool”
    Ethan walked over to Robby and took his hands, making his drop the pants he was holding. He leaned over and kissed Robby’s lips and then pulled him to the bed.
    “Come on.”
    “This is too weird. I mean, this is just way weird,” Robby muttered as Ethan pulled the covers back and sat down. His friend slide across the wide bed and sat with his legs spread out, his cock still rigid, pointing vertically and throbbing.
    “Come here,” Ethan said, holding out his arms with a smile.
    “What about your mom?”
    “It’s OK, dork. She’s not coming in. Now come here!”
    Robby looked uncertainly at the door and, then, at the two candles burning on the floor.
    “Blow that one out and put the other here,” Ethan said, pointing to this nightstand. Robby did as he was told and then climbed naked onto the bed. Ethan took his hand and pulled him close.
    “Come on,” he whispered as they scooted together, entwining their legs around each other’s hips. Ethan rested his hands on Robby’s thighs.
    “You are so cute,” he whispered. Robby blushed and looked down.
    “You really think so?”
    Ethan smiled and nodded.
    “I love your red hair and your freckles look so… I don’t know. You look so much like… I guess the perfect American boy. You remind me of Opie.”
    “What? Opie?” Robby demanded indignantly.
    “Sure. Say ‘Hey, Paw! Where’s Barney?’”
    “No way! I do not look like Opie. And, I don’t sound him, neither.”
    Ethan was grinning mischievously.
    “Sure you do. You have the same accent.”
    “I do not. He’s from North Carolina. I’m from Texas. There’s a big difference.”
    “Actually, Ronnie Howard’s from Oklahoma. Maybe that’s why you sound like him. Anyway, I didn’t mean to make you mad. I like it. I think you’re cute. I love the way you look and talk and how… real you are. I can look in your eyes and I know that you don’t lie or steal or cheat. You’re cool.”
    Robby looked down shyly at the rigid dicks between their legs and smiled.
    “I really think you’re cute, too. In fact.” Robby paused and then continued. “I think you’re beautiful. The first time I saw your ponytail, I hated it. But, you look so cool and part of it is because you don’t care what people think. You’re just so cool and smart and you know so much about meditation stuff and…”
    Before he could say anything else, Ethan leaned forward and kissed him.
    They sat silent for several minutes, just holding each others hands. Then Robby grinned.
    “What?” Ethan asked.
    “Allison and Chad sure were making out hard.”
    Ethan giggled.
    “They’re always going at it. Chad’s always horny. I think Allison teases him.”
    “What’s ‘horny’ mean?”
    “You know, when you’re feeling hot and randy and everything.”
    “Ah. So Allison teases him? She gets him horny and then won’t do anything?”
    “Do you, like, watch ‘em a lot?”
    Ethan gave a nasty grin.
    “Between you and me, I think Allison likes it. She’s kind of weird.”
    Robby sniffed.
    “She must be. She sure was getting crazy when Chad was kissing her boobies.”
    Ethan grinned.
    “It feels good.”
    “Does it?”
    Ethan gave Robby another nasty grin and slid his hands up Robby’s torso. Robby felt a thrill as his friend’s hand moved upward, but it was nothing compared to what happened when Ethan’s thumbs stopped on his nipples. Ethan slid his thumbs across the stiff little nubbins and Robby looked at if he had just received an electric shock. His eyes grew wide and his mouth fell open.
    “Feel good?” Ethan whispered nastily.
    Robby couldn’t respond at first. He squirmed a little as Ethan’s thumbs relentlessly rubbed his nipples. Then he sighed.
    “It’s weird, but, yeah, it feels good. Real good. Oh, wow. Oh, wow.”
    Ethan chuckled and then pulled at Robby’s nipples with his thumbs and index fingers.
    “Yeah, you like that?”
    “Oh, man. Oh, man, that feels so good. That makes my dick so hard!”
    “Yeah, do it to me.”
    Robby reached up and followed Ethan’s example. His friend closed his eyes and his mouth opened.
    “Oh, yeah. Keep doing that. Don’t stop.”
    Moaning and whimpering, the two boys writhed together, rubbing their nipples and breathing in each other’s ear.
    “Oh, man, Ethan, I feel so horny.”
    “Yeah. Keep doing it. Just keep doing it. Feel it, man. Feel how good it feels. Let it just feel good.”
    Robby felt so intense, so different. It was like rubbing his dick, but different. Yet, he was getting the same feeling inside his dick and deep behind it. Not on the outside, but it was sure a lot like rubbing.
    “Ethan, I gotta rub my dick!”
    “No! Just keep doing this. You can do it. Just keep doing this.”
    “Nnnng, mmmmm, nnnnnnnnnggggggg!”
    Robby’s moans were becoming more plaintive, as if he were going to cry. His voice was almost squeaking. Their heads were resting against each other and Robby could feel Ethan’s warm ragged breaths against his torso and his throbbing boner.
    Suddenly, Ethan almost growled . He grabbed Robby by the shoulders and pushed him down on the bed. The shocked boy looked up, his wide with surprise as Ethan crawled on top of him. Ethan’s body was laying on top of Robby’s, their hips meeting, their rigid dicks pressing against each other’s abdomens. Ethan was holding himself up by his elbows. His face hovered just inches over Robby’s, a hungry, almost manic expression on his face as he looked down at his friend.
    Robby couldn’t help it. He thrust his hips upward, sliding his stiff boner against Ethan, feeling Ethan’s rigid dick pulsing against him. Ethan growled, thrust back, and leaned down. Their mouths met and they began to hungrily kiss each other, their hips thrusting and pushing madly against each other. Robby’s arms wrapped tightly around Ethan as the squirmed and writhed against each other.
    Ethan’s tongue pushed against Robby’s lips. Ethan wanted to stick his tongue in Robby’s mouth! The thought was repulsive, but Robby knew he wanted it, needed it. His lips parted and Ethan’s tongue pushed in.
    “Nnnggg! Nnnggg!” they both moaned. They were insane as they ground together, thrusting and humping, desperate to make their dicks feel good, hungry to taste each other, frantic to male every square inch of their skin touch the other.
    Their cries grew louder and faster. Robby could feel the feeling building  faster and harder than it ever had. He was going to explode and it was more than he had ever felt in his life. He lost all rational thought as he humped and writhed and bucked, squeezing Ethan to him, thrusting his own tongue against the twisting, thrusting tongue of Ethan.
    They both stiffened and they both cried.
    Their simultaneous explosions were rocking the bed. They were mindlessly thrusting against each other, growling, crying, panting. Robby could feel moisture between them, coating his tummy. He could taste Ethan in his mouth. He could feel Ethan quaking atop him.
    He loved Ethan Spencer. In that moment, he knew he loved Ethan.
    And, when they finally collapsed and Ethan rested his head atop Robby’s, they lay on the bed, Ethan stop Robby, panting in his face, Robby experienced the most intense moment of peace and love in his life.
    A moment later, Ethan took a deep breath and rolled to the side off Robby. Robby rolled with him, his arms locked around his friend. They looked into each other’s eyes and grinned.
    “I love you, Ethan,” Robby whispered into Ethan’s mouth.
    “I love you, Robby.”
    They smiled at each other and, then, Robby said, “Let’s do that again. This time I want to be on top.”
    Ethan gave the biggest smile of his life.

Well, there you have it. Chapter Five and our first love scene. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you write to me with your opinion at chriswriter@operamail. com. Thank you so much for your support!!!