Date: Fri, 30 Aug 2002 23:10:10 -0700 From: Dewey Subject: Brian and Pete Chapter 14 Brian and Pete Chapter Fourteen Decisions Copyright Notice - Copyright (c)January 2002 by DeweyWriter Ltd. This story is copyrighted by the author and the author retains all rights. This work may not be duplicated in any form, physical, electronic, audio, or otherwise without the authors express written permission. All applicable copyright laws apply and will be enforced. Legal Disclaimer: This story is a work of erotic fiction involving teenage boys partially based on real people and events. Names have been changed to protect the guilty as well as the innocent. All the usual rules apply. If it is illegal for you to be reading this now, then don't continue. --oo00OO00oo-- "Hello, son. It's good to see you again," Kevin said in a quiet, emotion choked voice. "Whatever. I'm busy. Why are you wasting my time?" "Raymond," Mrs. Cox said in a disapproving tone, "maybe you should go in and see what they have to say." "Fuck that. They can tell me here or not at all." "Ray, I need to talk to you about your case. Would you at least come up to the office?" "Oh, no. I ain't goin' up there again. Last time you told me to get the fuck out!" "We did not!" yelled Jason as he shot to his feet and ran for the door. "We gave you a choice..." Kevin quieted him with a hand on his shoulder. With great effort, Jason contained himself. For the first time, I saw he was feverishly clutching Ray's medallion. Ray stared back at him with contempt. I squeezed Brian's hand for comfort. "Some choice!" "Ray, please?" Kevin was pleading. "Tell me now, or I'm walking." "I don't think this is something you want to discuss in public." "Bye. Thanks for wasting a perfectly good day." Ray turned to walk away. When he was half way to the car, Kevin blurted, "You're free, Ray!" "What? Free of what?" "Your parents. You're free to be adopted now." "Yeah right. Who's gonna adopt a loud mouthed wise ass fifteen year old faggot?" Tears fell from Kevin's eyes. "I would." Ray seemed to swell in his fury. "Don't play with me, old man! You told me to get lost and I did. You expect me to come crawling back, begging you to take me in? Wrong! Not happenin'." Brian marched over to the door and calmly walked outside to face Ray. I could tell he was pissed by the way he held his head and shoulders stiffly erect. "What do you want?" Brian came nose to nose with Ray. He said something, but I couldn't make it out. Ray responded, "And I'm supposed to believe that?" "Yes." "Why?" "Because I wouldn't joke about that, Ray. You know that." "No, I don't know anything. They said they wanted me, then kicked me out." "They didn't kick you out. They gave you a choice, and you chose to leave. Not them." "They could have stopped me, but they didn't. Fuck 'em. I don't need 'em. I'm fine on my own. And fuck you, too." What happened next is a little bit unclear. Brian moved, and Ray fell down, hand on his cheek. Kevin held Mrs. Cox back, to let Brian and Ray have it out. "YOU FUCKING IDIOT!" Brian screamed. "Standing right over there, you have a family that loves you like their own, and you're going to throw that away BECAUSE OF YOUR FUCKING PRIDE?" Brian struggled to control himself as Ray regained his feet, his eye already starting to swell. "You don't deserve them, you self-centered egotistical prick." "I'm an idiot? Look at them! The only reason they put up with you is because Pete won't let you go. If he dropped you, you'd be out on your ass just like me. Talk about stupid." I could see Brian's eyes narrow as Ray spoke. "You're wrong. They love me. I know they do." "Yeah, right. The only reason they say they love you is to keep Pete happy, and the only reason Pete says he loves you is because he gets a quick piece of ass when he wants it!" "You better take that back, Ray." Brian's voice was dangerously low. Ray's grin was pure malice. "The truth hurts, don't it, loverboy?" Brian launched at Ray, and the fight was on. I was surprised to see that they were pretty evenly matched. They were screaming at each other, back and forth, Brian telling Ray how stupid he was, and Ray taunting him with our supposed lack of love. They fell down into the lawn, and Brian quickly seized the advantage, neatly rolling Ray up into a small package. Ray continued struggling, calling Brian every name in the book, but Brian just held on, speaking quietly but pointedly into Ray's ear. "Lemme go! Lemme go, you fuck!" "Not until you hear what I have to say!" "No! You got nothin' to say I wanna hear! Lemme go!" "Ray, why are you afraid of letting them be your family?" "I ain't afraid of nuthin, you prick! Lemme up and I'll show you who's afraid!" Ray renewed his struggle, but Brian held firm. "Is it because your parents abandoned you?" "Don't you ever mention them in my presence again! They ain't my parents! They never were! They're nuthin to me, get it?" "But it still hurts, doesn't it? That they didn't want you?" "SHUT UP! Shut the fuck up!" "Mommy and Daddy didn't care about you. You weren't worth the effort to love. You were dirt to them. A source of pain and misery." "Stop!" Ray screeched, but Brian had no mercy. "What happened when their already-troublesome child grew up? They had to get rid of you! They had the money; what did they need you for? All you were was another mouth to feed, and you were gay to boot! 'Can't have a fag living in our house,' they said, so they beat you and beat you until you went away!" Ray's struggling ceased. "Stop. Please stop," he pleaded through his tears. Ray was on the verge of crying, but Brian continued on. "You entered the foster care system. How many more families didn't want you? Three? Four? More? You're a rude, crude teenager and no one wants you!" "Why are you doing this to me?" Ray wailed. "Because you don't appreciate what Kevin, Pete, and Jason are willing to do for you, ya big dope! They want to adopt you! They want you just as you are! They want you in their family, and you just want to run! You have their love. You've always had it! And it scares you because you're afraid it won't last; that they'll kick you out just like your parents did. They're not going anywhere, Ray! They're here for you, regardless of whether you accept the adoption or not." "How do I know that?" Ray countered. "That bitch used to tell me she'd never leave me all the time when I was little, and look what happened! Why set myself up to go through that again?" "Can I let you go now? Will you listen to what we have to say?" Sniffing, Ray said, "Yes." Brian released him, and Ray sat on the lawn facing a crouching Brian, tears still streaming down his face. I was surprised to see tears on Brian's cheeks, too. "Brian? Why do you care about what happens to me? After all I did to you?" "You didn't do anything that left a lasting mark, Ray. I know what it's like to go through life feeling unloved. As to why you should give them a chance... well, they'll never be able to prove themselves to you if you don't give them an opportunity." Ray and Brian seemed oblivious to the fact that Jason, Dad, Mrs. Cox, and I were listening from the front porch. "I don't want to get hurt again!" Ray was crying again, tears running down his cheeks. I think I saw some tears in Brian's eyes, too. Brian pulled him into an embrace, but Ray shrugged it off. "And you think I do? Ray, life is a risk. Love is a risk. You risk your heart and soul, because you bare them to the people that love you, and whom you want to love. But if you never risk it, you'll never find love, either." Ray wiped his nose with his arm. "I don't know if I can do that again." "We'll help you." "Why?" he demanded. "Because we love you." Ray stared at Brian, disbelief plain on his face. "Ray, you're a lovable person, and you're capable of loving others. Nothing in your past has taken either of those things away from you. All you have to do is look on the porch to see it's true." Ray turned his head, seemingly shocked to find us gathered on the porch, watching the interchange between them. Tears were still falling as he examined our faces in turn. Abruptly, Ray rose and ran to the car. Once inside, he held himself while he cried. Brian sighed and limped back to us. "Are you okay, baby?" I asked. "Yeah. Ray just kicked my knee while I was taking him down. It'll be fine in an hour or so." I hugged him tightly. "Brian," Kevin said, eyes shining, "I don't know how you do it." "Do what?" Kevin didn't answer, but wrapped Brian in a bear hug. Jason just smiled sadly as he watched Ray in the car, crying himself out. Then he walked to the car and opened the door. Ray immediately tried to stop the waterworks, but it was way too late. "Ray, I just want you to know," Jason said quietly, "you'll always be my brother." He handed Ray his medallion, hugged him, and backed away. Ray didn't move a muscle. He just stared at the pendant, running his fingers over the raised symbol in the center. "What's this?" he asked quietly. "It's for you. It's my gift- our gift- to you." "But... why? What does this mean?" Jason was choking up. In an unsteady voice, he answered, "The symbol means 'younger brother'. We all have them, including Dad. They remind us that we're family. Brothers. Brothers Forever. Nothing will change that." "Why give it to me?" "Because, Ray. You are my brother. Forever. No matter what. And if you decide not to be with us, it's something to remember us by." With shaking hands, Ray continued to examine what Jason had given him. For a long while, he sat there, not moving. Jason backed away from the car to join us on the porch. Kevin embraced Jason, holding him tightly. In a quiet voice, Kevin said, " You've done all you can, boys. It's up to him now." "The hell it is." Brian pulled away from me and stomped his way to the open car door. He physically pulled Ray out of the car and slammed him against the side. It looked so painful that I winced in sympathy. "Now, look, Ray. I know you're afraid, but I also know, deep down inside, that you want to stay. They're afraid that you won't stay with them. I'm going to make sure you do. You have two choices. You can come back with us as you are, or you can leave- in an ambulance, and come back in a body cast. You have five minutes to decide whether or not I beat you to a bloody pulp." Ray glared at Brian. "You and whose army?" "I don't need an army for a weak little fuckstain like you." "Oh yeah?" "Yeah!" "Prove it!" "You forget already? I just did." "You took me by surprise! Like this!" Ray swung and planted a cruel looking right hook to Brian's left eye; about the same place Brian had hit Ray earlier. Brian staggered back a few steps and then gathered himself for an attack, but before Brian could retaliate, Ray said, "We're even." "No we're not, but we can settle this later. So what's you decision?" "The adoption came through?" "It came through last night." "And they really want me back?" "They really want you back, Ray." Ray once again searched our faces. "I'm going to have to think about it. I'm ready to go," he added to Mrs. Cox as he got back in the car. She spoke to Kevin in a hushed tone for a moment, then got in the car and drove away. --ooOOoo-- The house was very quiet that night. Jason retreated to his room and didn't come out. Kevin ran around the house for a few hours, as if unsure what to do with himself, and then left to go who knows where. Probably over to see Ben. Brian and I watched TV to get our minds off of things, while he held an icepack to his eye. It was going to be a good shiner. Around six, Brian and I got hungry. I rummaged around and decided to make spaghetti, since it was simple. Brian tried to help me, but he just got in the way, so I shooed him out of the kitchen after he set the table. The poor guy's eye had swollen shut. People at school would love it. Jason didn't come down for dinner. The only time he showed his face was to take a phone call from David, but he went straight back to his room. Kevin didn't return until after Brian and I were in bed. We didn't say much before we went to sleep, but we did cuddle for a while, and fell asleep in each other's arms. The next morning, Brian and I got up for school and went through our normal routine. His eye wasn't swollen shut, but he said he couldn't see out of it very well, either. I drove us to school, which was weird. Jason always drove when it wasn't Kevin or Sharon. It was finals week. I wasn't worried, because studying with Brian helped me a lot. It was amazing how he could look at something just once or twice and then remember it almost forever. It took me time to get things down, but I could count on him to help me when I needed it, but he sure didn't make it easy. When I asked him a question, he'd ask me a question in return, to make me think about the answer, and try and reason it out for myself. The only way he'd give me the answer outright was if he ran out of questions (a rare occurrence) or couldn't think of a way to use his usual method. As expected, Brian caught a lot of flack over his black eye from the guys at school. He just listened to what was said and laughed right along with them, but I could tell he was getting tired of it by the end of the day. Jared was waiting for us at our usual table at lunch. The school seemed empty with all the seniors gone, and without Brent, it would be just us three. Jared waved as we sat down, chewing a mouthful of mystery meat. "Hi Jared," we said simultaneously. He swallowed, "Hey guys. HOLY SHIT! Who happened to you?" Jared was obviously staring at Brian's bruised face. "We heard from Ray," I said. "Oh. Really." Jared's tone was cool, but he was still looking at Brian's eye. "Yeah," Brian continued. "The adoption came through late Friday night. We saw him on Sunday." "And..." "He and I had words, then exchanged black eyes. He hasn't accepted the adoption." "He hasn't rejected it either, Brian," I said. Jared's expression was hard to read. I know he still harbored some feelings for Ray, but he'd also been badly hurt. "He said he'd 'think about it'. I don't understand what there is to think about." "I do," Brian said. "He's spent the last couple months bracing himself to live his life without a family. Now he has the chance to have a family again. It's another huge shift in his perspective." "Still," Jared said, "He lived with you guys for almost 4 years. He knows what you're like. There aren't any unknowns." "Doesn't matter. He's got to shift his whole attitude toward life again." I took a bite, chewing pensively. I thought Ray was just being stubborn as usual, but I wasn't going to say that to Brian. He's incredibly empathetic to things like this. I was pretty sure he could 'feel' what Ray was thinking and feeling that Sunday afternoon. "What'd you guys take this morning. English?" "Yeah," I replied. "It was pretty easy. All we had to do was write an essay on anything we wanted. Mr. Walker said he'd grade it for form and punctuation, spelling, the usual stuff." "Yeah," Brian said, "It was a piece of cake. Math is the next one. Should be pretty easy." "Speak for yourself, Bri. You know I hate math." "You do well at it for hating it." I snorted. "I had chemistry this morning. It was pretty brutal." "Did you pass, Jared?" I asked. "The final? I hope so. I hope he grades on the curve, too." Thinking the same about biology, I asked, "Does Mr. Griffith use the curve?" He smirked. "You should know better than that. Last year, only six people out of the whole sophomore class got an 'A'." "That sucks." "Don't worry, babe. You'll do fine." "I hope so. "We don't take the final for seventh period until Thursday morning, anyway. We can go over the material again this week if you want to." "Okay. That's the only one I'm really worried about." "No problem," Brian said. "Jared, can I ask you a question?" "Sure, Brian." I smiled to myself. Jared couldn't stop staring at Brian's eye. "What's it like to be out?" "You mean, am I harassed?" "Yeah, I guess." "I don't get bothered, mostly. Some people bump me in the halls, knock my books out of my hands, that kind of thing. Other people can't look me in the eye. I've lost a few so-called friends. I've told you about that stuff before." "Doesn't it make you angry?" Brian asked. "Of course, but what am I going to do? Fight them?" "It's not right." "No, it's not, but we can't do anything about it, Bri," I said. "Let me think about it for a while." "Brian, we only have a week left of school." "I know." Brian chewed thoughtfully for a moment, swallowed, and then said, "We haven't talked about it for a while, Pete. Do you want to come out?" "Do you?" He nodded. "When?" Jared asked, "Are you guys sure you want to do this?" "If we do," Brian answered, "we'll have safety in numbers. Other people will come out, if not to everyone, then at least to us. It'll be okay." "When, Bri?" His face transformed into an evil grin. "Thursday at lunch, right here. I'm gonna plant a big ol' kiss on ya." Jared was keenly observing my reaction. "Are you sure?" "Positive, if you want to do this. If not, I'll wait until we get home and plant one on another part of your anatomy." "Brian, don't say stuff like that. I have a hard enough time being around you without you making things more difficult. Especially when we have to walk to class." He grinned mischievously. "Now you know what I feel like all the time. Why do you think I carry a book everywhere I go?" Jared chuckled. "I've always wondered about that. I've never seen you open a single book you bring to lunch." "Now you know!" The lunch hour ended and we went to take the math final. It wasn't as bad as I'd feared, and Brian was the first person done. He pretended to work on the test until I was finished, and then turned his in about five minutes after me. After dropping off our books, we headed home. Jason was gone, and Kevin was at work, so we went straight to bed. --ooOOoo- Brian and I decided between us not to come out at school, at least not that year. There were too many ambivalent feelings to go through with it. I was still worried about what might happen when people found out. The rest of the week passed uneventfully until Thursday afternoon. Brent wasn't at school anymore, so some of his Junior friends took advantage of it, and attacked Jared. Brian and I happened to be just around the corner when it happened, and the noise alerted us. When Brian saw what was happening, he crashed through the crowd and literally knocked one of the attackers unconscious with a huge right to the jaw. Jared seemed to be holding his own fairly well against his three assailants, and with Brian having taken one out of the fight, the two remaining attackers turned to face him, giving Jared a chance to disengage and move behind Brian. Brian just stared at them, waiting for them to make a move, as I pushed my way through the stunned mob surrounding them, and stood beside my boyfriend. Brian spoke in low, dangerous tones, which told me he was ready to kill. "You should go. I don't want your blood on my clothes." The two thugs glared at him, but didn't attack. Brian had a reputation after the fight he and Brent had earlier in the year. It was in that standoff that I got my first look at Jared's battle scars. He had taken a shot to the left eye, and had a small cut on his left cheek. Other than that, he looked okay. I snorted. Maybe I should get someone to give me a black eye, then we'd look like a matched set. No one moved until Mr. Johnson and a couple security people arrived, then the crowd gradually dispersed. "You again, Mr. Kellam? All right, who started this?" Five boys said, "They did," simultaneously. The sixth remained unconscious. "What happened to him?" One of the attackers said, "Kellam took him out. He wasn't even looking." Brian calmly stated, "He wasn't looking because he was too busy trying to kill Jared." "All of you come with me." Mr. Johnson motioned to a security guard to stay with sleeping beauty until the nurse could look him over. The other came with us, followed by a teacher that had arrived just after Mr. Johnson. In the office, we were separated by groups. Mr. Johnson joined us first. "Well, well, well. Another fight for Mr. Kellam. Why am I not surprised?" The Vice Principal's lips held a slight smile. "I suppose they attacked Mr. Tanner and you came to his rescue." "Exactly," said Brian. "What did you do to knock that boy out?" "I only threw one punch. It got their attention." "I should say. I trust you, Mr. Kellam. I won't ask why the fight started." "It started," Jared said, "because I'm gay." Mr. Johnson nodded. "I assumed as much, Mr. Tanner." Jared wasn't shocked that Mr. Johnson knew of his orientation. I guess he thought everyone knew. "Go to the nurse's office and get yourself an icepack and some gauze. I don't want blood on my floor." He said it with a smile. "Yes sir." Jared rose and did as he was told. "What am I to do with you? This is becoming an irritating habit of yours, Brian." I was surprised to hear Mr. Johnson use Brian's first name. I'd never heard him use anything other than mister or miss toward anyone, teachers included. "If they'd leave me and my friends alone, I wouldn't be in here so much." "It looks to me like you've had another fight earlier in the week. Not on school grounds, I trust?" "No. My... my brother and I had a fight. He looks as bad as I do." "Not something to be proud of. Can I expect this to continue next year?" "If things remain as they are. They might get worse, though." "And why is that?" Brian looked at me for permission. I nodded and put my arm around his shoulder. "We're gay, too. We're thinking about coming out next year." Mr. Johnson blinked in surprise. "I see. I think I have some extra work to do, then. Why do you feel you must 'come out'?" I said, "We're both tired of hiding. If other couples can kiss and hug in the hallway, we should be able to, as well." "You've thought about the consequences, then?" "Of course. We considered coming out today, but we both decided we had some more thinking to do." Brian added, "And given what just happened.... People are already wondering about us. It'd just be a confirmation. With three of us, we have safety in numbers. And I'm sure that there are more like us." Jared returned, gauze in hand. Mr. Johnson nodded thoughtfully. He pulled out a piece of paper and made a few notes. "Let me see that cut, Jared." Jared complied. The cut was small; only half a centimeter. "You'll be fine, but it might scar. I recommend you see your doctor." "Okay, I will." "Have you checked out with the library and the custodian?" "Not yet," I answered. Brian shook his head. "I have," Jared said. "The you may go. I'll go deal with those ruffians next door. Have a good summer, boys. I'll see you in August." "Thanks, Mr. Johnson." "Don't mention it, Brian." There was a babble of voices coming from the next room as Mr. Johnson entered. As we left, we heard him bellow, "Quiet!" Brian and I checked out and headed home, inviting Jared over later. School was over for another year. We'd be Juniors in the fall, with Jared being a Senior. It didn't seem possible, but it was. On the drive home, I thought of everything we could do together, from camping on the beach, to the mountains, anywhere that a car would take us, if Ben and Lisa would let Brian go. I was sure they would. Wouldn't it be cool, I thought, to take a road trip for a month? Go down to that little town we stayed in a couple of years ago, then down to the San Francisco area. We'd have to see Chris and his mom, Danny too. Then on to LA for all the parks and the beaches, over to Phoenix, up to the Grand Canyon and Las Vegas, back through the Sierras to Yosemite and Lassen Park, Crater Lake, Bend, and back home. No one to hurry us. Money wasn't an issue. I had plenty available for the trip, and Kevin would let me spend it. It's not like he has a choice, but I like to give him the illusion of power. "Um, Pete? Are we going somewhere? I thought we were going home." I'd been so preoccupied with planning our trip that I missed the turn for our street! Grumbling, I turned on the next street and came in the back way, Brian chortling the whole time. "What were you thinking?" "I was making plans for the summer." "Really? Like what?" "Oh, I don't know. Maybe some camping on the beach or up in the mountains. Maybe a trip down south. I don't know." Brian sighed and patted my thigh, sending a shiver up my spine. "That would be nice. I'd like to see that place you went camping with the family, down in southern Oregon. I don't remember the name." "Brookings. Yeah, I was just thinking about that. Maybe Jason and Ray or Jared could go with us." Brian hummed his agreement as we pulled into the driveway. I knew then that we'd take that road trip. I wanted Brian to see those places. They had a special place in my heart, and I hoped that Brian would come to think of them as special, too. Jason and David were home. They were in the kitchen digging for a snack. They were wearing shorts and nothing else. "Hi guys," Brian said, a smirk on his face, "having fun?" Jason glared at Brian, but seemed unfazed. David answered, "I'm always having fun of one kind or another, right Jason?" Jason blushed and tried to hide in the refrigerator. "Boy, he wasn't kidding about that black eye. Where'd the guy hit you?" "Here," Brian said as he pointed to the point of the cheek bone. "It didn't hurt really, just bloomed well," Brian replied. "It was a sucker punch." "Sure." David grinned, making me think he didn't believe Brian. Then David joined Jason at the fridge. As Pete and I headed up to our room to change, we heard David exclaim, "OH! Whipped cream! And HONEY!" Cracking up, we shut the door behind us. As I undressed, I heard Brian saying, "Mmmm... whipped cream...." in his best his Homer Simpson, and I finally lost it. I could mount no resistance when Brian jumped me on the bed, and then I didn't want to resist. --ooOOoo- When I heard the racket down the hall, and then saw Jared in the middle of it, my brain stopped working. I was running on raw instinct. All I could see was that asshole's jaw, and him hitting the ground when I broke into the fight. The next thing I knew, he was on the ground, and the other two guys turned to look at me. I vaguely remember staring them down, and then Mr. Johnson showed up. I remember everything after that perfectly. Mr. Johnson puts on a good asshole act, but he's very cool once you get past it. He has a good sense of justice too. The time he suspended me for two weeks, he told me that if I hadn't popped off to the coach, he would have only given me the week required for fighting. We talked about it for a while too, and he got to know me a bit. He asked me to avoid fighting, and feeling flip, I told him I would avoid every fight I started. He actually laughed, and sent me home. Pete told me later about the crack I made about getting their blood on my shirt, and it did sound funny, but I don't remember saying it. In any case, it kept my shirt and their faces clean. On the way home, Pete seemed preoccupied. I wasn't sure what it was about, so I didn't say anything to him. I thought he might be angry with me for jumping into the middle of that fight without thinking about it. As we got closer to home, I began imagining things that he could be pissed at me for, and of course my mind started running rampant with the worst case scenarios. Only when Pete missed our street did I speak to him, and it seemed to make him even more angry when I pointed it out to him. Trying to lighten the mood a bit, I forced a laugh, and tried to get him to smile. It didn't work very well, so I finally asked him what he was thinking. It kind of caught me by surprise when he said he was planning our summer. Everything he said sounded way cool. Maybe we could turn it into a road trip for a couple weeks, just him and me. Jason and David might be cool, so would Jared and Ray, but they weren't seeing each other, and I doubt the foster home would let Ray skip town for a couple weeks. It was like being on probation or something. When we got home, we found Jason and David looking around the kitchen for a snack. They had obviously just gotten out of bed, judging by their hair and their flushed appearance, not to mention the tents in their shorts. I couldn't help but give them a hard time. It was so strange to see Jason playing around with David in more than a casual friendly way. You could tell he was uncomfortable with it too, but it didn't stop him. I guess it was something he had to get used to. Pete and I retreated to our bedroom to leave David and Jason to their playtime. David apparently found something good to eat judging by his excitement. Pete closed the door behind us and slowly took off his clothes while I raced to get undressed. I thought back to what David had found in the fridge and said "Mmmm... Whipped cream...." Pete started laughing, and I knew I had him. I tackled him to the bed and slobbered all over his face, all the while helping him get out of his remaining clothing. It wasn't very hard, because between my licking his face and his near hysteria, I had him helpless. When he was finally free, he grabbed my head and kissed me. Suddenly, our situations were reversed as I melted into him. --ooOOoo- A knock on the door woke me out of a deep sleep. "Guys?" Jason's voice. I heard the door open, and too late I realized Pete and I were naked lying on the bed. Jason peeked in then quickly pulled his head back. "Sorry. We were going to go eat dinner, do some shopping, and maybe see a movie. Want to go?" I looked at the clock. It said six-thirty. Pete stretched next to me. "Sure. Can you give us twenty minutes to get cleaned up?" "Sure. No problem. We'll be in my room waiting. Oh, Dad said he's working late tonight." "Thanks, Jason." "Sorry about walking in on you..." I shook my head. "It's okay. It's not like we have anything to hide." Pete just smiled. "Okay. Well, uh, we'll be waiting." He closed the door behind him. We took our shower together, and were out within ten minutes. It was fun, but we stopped before we had too much fun. That we would save for later on. Twenty minutes later, we were in David's car heading out to dinner. Jason had left his car at David's since he knew he'd end up there eventually. We were going to this little Mongolian barbecue place. I'd never had it, but all three of them swore up and down it was great, and with the all-you-can-eat dinner, it was a good place for a bottomless pit like myself to eat. And it was terrific! We tossed around ideas for the summer with Jason and David. David talked about going to Hawaii and taking Jason with him. Of course Jason protested he couldn't afford the trip, but David told him he could find some way to pay him back, if he used his imagination. Jason just blushed. Pete became quite thoughtful at the mention of Hawaii. I kicked him under the table and said, "Don't you dare!" He just grinned and got up for another helping. "Thanks, guys. Now I have to talk him out of that trip, too!" David looked at me curiously. "Why?" "Because I can't afford to go, and I want to contribute to our relationship." Jason looked troubled as I spoke. Exasperated, David said, "Look, Brian, you do contribute to the relationship. If you didn't, then there wouldn't be a relationship. There's more to being together than who pays for what. If Pete wants to take you to Hawaii, or Jamaica for that matter..." "Don't give him any ideas!" "... then let him. It's part of the package. Enjoy it, and like I told Jason: you'll find creative ways to pay him back." Jason glanced at me and our eyes met. I could tell he was having as much trouble with this aspect of his relationship with David as I was having in mine with Pete. I made a mental note to talk to Jason about this later, but later became sooner as Pete came back and I was getting up for my fourth bowl. Jason joined me for his third, leaving Pete and David alone at the table. Not a good thing, in my mind, but I couldn't very well go back. "Jason, you don't think David's putting ideas into Pete's head, do you?" "Most likely," he replied with a wide grin. "He might be trying to talk Pete into taking you to Hawaii with us when we go." "That'd be cool, but I don't like Pete spending that kind of money on me." He sighed. "I know the feeling. David does the same with me. He spends like there's no tomorrow." "Well, you know Pete; he's not like that. Not usually anyway. He needs to save that money for college." "Brian, he doesn't. He's all taken care of. Probably for the rest of his life. David is too. He showed me his bank accounts." "Why? Trying to brag or something?" "No, not really. He was trying to get me to accept that he had more money than he could spend, so I should just take what he gave me. I was kind of insulted. He made it seem like I was a beggar or something." "That's exactly my problem! I feel like I'm leeching off of Pete." Jason smiled. "It may seem that way, but you're not. You guys love each other. Really, truly love each other. David and I... well, we're lovers, but love? I don't think so. Not at this point anyway. That's what makes the difference." "Do you see it going to the next level, to real love?" He shrugged. "Maybe. We'll see. We've only been going out for a little while. It's way too early for me to make any kind of commitment. I might meet someone else, too." "Like a girl?" "Could be. Who knows." Our conversation ended as we reached the line to load up our bowls. Upon returning to the table, I saw Pete sigh in relief as I sat down. David seemed not to notice the furtive glance Pete gave me to indicate David was driving him up a wall. I smiled sympathetically and patted his leg as I sat down. Normal conversation resumed as we finished dinner. David insisted on paying the bill. Our next stop was the Washington Square Mall. We agreed to split up and meet below the food court in an hour. Pete and I went one way, and David and Jason went the other. "What do you think of David, Bri?" "Um, he's okay, I guess. Why?" "He's still giving me some weird vibes." "Like?" "Like he's always talking about how much money he has." "He told me that money couldn't be the center of a relationship if it's going to last." "He said that?" "Well, not those exact words. We were talking about what people bring to relationships, and how money didn't mean everything. There's more to a relationship than who pays for what." Pete was quiet for a while. I knew I'd pissed him off. I didn't say anything either. I just followed him around through Suncoast Video and Babbage's, pretty much making myself miserable. Pete noticed as we left the software store and led me to a bench. "Are you okay, Bri? Did I say something?" "No. Did I?" "No. Well, yeah, but it just got me thinking." "You're not angry?" "Of course not, Bri." "Oh. I thought you were." "Nope." He picked up a CD and looked it over. "Do you resent that I have this money coming in. Bri?" His question caught me by surprise. "Resent it? Kind of. I don't know if resent is the right word. I guess I'm jealous more than anything." "Why?" "Because... well...." I held up my hand with the ring he gave me. "I'm jealous, because I want to be able to get you things like this on my own, without you having to spend your money so I can get you something. I mean... Oh, hell. I don't know what I mean." "I do," Pete said in a whisper. "I know exactly what you mean. But I don't know what to do about it." Pete's features set in a melancholy expression. "I'm trying, Pete. I really am. I know you don't mean to make me feel this way, and I probably shouldn't, but I do." Suddenly, Pete's expression brightened. "You know what that means to me?" "No..." "You're afraid that if I pay for something you want to give me, it somehow means less, right?" "Well, kind of. It's like I'm leeching." "But, because you want to do this for me on your own, it means even more to me. I could have bought myself a matching ring when I got yours, but it didn't seem right. I know you want me to have one too, right?" I nodded. "And you can pick it out and write the inscription, right?" I nodded again. "Then we can go over and you can do that. I'll pay for it, and you can pay me back." "I'll have to get a job, and it'll take me months to make enough to pay you back." "Didn't you listen to what David said, Bri? Money isn't important! It doesn't matter who pays for it! Your love would buy that ring for me, Bri." "Then you're paying for my love!" "Yeah, I'm paying for a high class gigolo." He saw my face darken and hastily continued, "Brian, you're not thinking! Look, we've been together for almost eight months now, right?" "Yeah, the end of this month." "You still love me?" "Of course I do!" "I'm yours and you're mine, right?" "Yeah..." "And everything I have belongs to you and vice versa, right?" Now I saw where he was going with it, I balked. "It's not right for me to take your money, Pete." "You're not taking it. I'm giving it to you! Brian, you are my life. You're my husband in every way that matters. If you want to look at it another way, I make the money for our family, and you're my adoring husband." He smiled excitedly at me, and try as I might to take umbrage at him comparing me to June Cleaver, I couldn't do it. It made sense, in a way. I wasn't sure I was completely comfortable with it, but I promised myself I'd work at it. I could tell it made him happy to give me things; to share his good fortune (if you can call losing his grandparents good fortune). "Brian, I asked you if you'd spend the rest of your life with me. You said yes. Do you still mean it?" "What?" "Do you still want...." "Yes, yes, of course!" "Then part of that is sharing with each other. Sharing everything." "But I want to help contribute to that!" I was yelling loudly, but quickly lowered my voice when I saw people staring at us. "I want to help you support us." "Brian, baby, you do. I'd give every penny I have, and more, just to make sure I have you with me. The money means nothing, just like David said." "That still doesn't tell me how I come close to matching what you put into our relationship." "Why are you thinking in material terms? I fell in love with you for who you are, Bri, not for anything else. Why did you fall for me?" Poignant question. Why did I fall in love with him? It wasn't for the money. When I fell in love with him, he was twelve, and had none. "For the same reasons." "Then why does the money make the slightest difference? You give me everything I want, Brian. Everything. Would you stop loving me if the money disappeared?" "No." "Why not?" "Because I don't care about the money!" Again I was raising my voice, causing people to look. I saw a security guard walking our way, eyes on us. "Make up your mind. Either money is important, or it isn't. If it's important, then you'll have to get a job to get your own money. If it isn't, then you have to share mine. Make your..." "Is there a problem here?" "...choice." Pete looked up at the security guard. "No problem. We're just having a conversation." "Looks more like an argument to me. You kids are going to have to move on. You're causing a disturbance." "We're having a heated discussion, that's all," I said. "I don't care. Get moving, or do I have to go get the police?" Turning away from the guard, Pete said, "Brian, do you understand what I'm trying to say? It's your decision. You know how I feel." "There's no decision to make, Pete. It's just going to take some getting used to." "Move it!" The rent-a-cop ordered. "This is none of your business," I said. "We're having a family conversation. We're not fighting." "I told you, I don't care. Get your butt out of that bench and get moving!" "Come on, Pete. He's getting too much pleasure perving on us." Before the guard could say anything, I stood and walked off toward Fye's Music and Movies down by J.C. Penny. Pete gave the guy an insolent grin as he followed me through the crowds. We met Jason and David right on time and decided to check out what was playing at the theatres, and maybe go back to David's place afterward. We drove down to Wilsonville, but by the time we got there, we'd decided to skip the theatre and go straight to David's, and watch a movie there. Pete and I took the loveseat while Jason and David took the couch. We threw in the first Indiana Jones film and settled in with popcorn and chips. Toward the end of the film, the phone rang. David excused himself, and answered it. It must have been a half hour before he returned and sat back down without a word. Jason whispered in his ear, but David just shook his head, remaining silent. The movie ended about eleven-thirty. Jason called home and left a message, saying we'd be staying over. David disappeared for a while, long enough for Jason to go looking for him. When he came back, Pete and I had started the second film, and settled in to watch it. Jason sat down on the couch, and put on his shoes, which he had taken off earlier. "Come on. We're going home." Pete and I exchanged a worried glance, but said nothing as we followed Jason's instructions. As we drove home, the car was filled with a stormy silence. Not wanting to rock the boat, I sat in the back and kept quiet. Pete kept glancing over at Jason, becoming more worried as time passed. Unable to take it any more, Pete spoke. "What happened, Jason?" "Nothin'. Don't worry about it." "Uh, too late, Bro." Jason cast an irritated glance at Pete, then sighed. "David's Dad called. They'll be in town day after tomorrow. For two months." "Okay... did he say something to you?" "Yeah. He told me to get lost." "Out of the blue?" "No. I'm not going to tell you what happened, but it was time to leave." The silence returned, and lasted until we pulled into the driveway when Pete said, "I'm sorry, Jason." "Don't be, Pete. David has some things he needs to deal with. Besides, I learned something tonight. Something I should have known a long time ago." "Like what?" "Like, I don't know him as well as I thought I did." "Are you guys over, Jase?" I asked. "I don't know. We'll see tomorrow or the next day. He needs his space right now." Jason unlocked the front door, and we walked in to find Kevin asleep on the couch in front of the TV, an empty bottle of Crown Royal on the floor beside him. --ooOOoo- Getting Kevin upstairs was a chore. He wasn't that heavy for the three of us, but he was dead weight, and he flopped all over the place. He woke up just as we got him into the bed and lurched for the toilet. He didn't quite make it. Jason watched him, his expression alternating from concern to disgust. "Go ahead and go to bed, guys. I'll take care of him." "No, Jase. We'll do it together," Pete replied. Jason looked deeply into Pete's eyes, and then in mine. I nodded. Softly, he said, "Thank you." I smiled, and we turned to the task at hand. Kevin was hugging the toilet bowl, half laying on the floor, moaning. In a slurred voice, he said, "Jusht kill me now." "I don't think so, Dad," Jason said "We need to get you cleaned up and in bed, okay? Brian, go call your dad. Ask him to come over, okay?" "Sure, Jase." I ran to the office and dialed my dad's number. He answered on the fourth ring. He answered with a sleepy, "Hello?" "Dad, we need you to come over." "Brian? Now?" "Yeah. It's Kevin. He's pretty bad off." My dad was awake now. "What do you mean?" "We found him on the couch with an empty bottle of Crown Royal next to him. He puked first thing when he woke up." I heard a long sigh. "Okay. I'll be there in about twenty minutes. In the mean time, just keep him safe." "Okay, Dad. The door will be unlocked." "See you in a few, son." "Bye." I ran downstairs and unlocked the door, then returned to the others to find Kevin more or less kneeling in front of the toilet, the sweet odor of alcohol heavy in the air. "Dad'll be here in about twenty minutes." "No! Notch'er dad," Kevin drawled. "I'm okay. Really." Again he retched. "Um, I don't think so Dad," Jason replied after Kevin was done. "Why did you do this?" "Do what?" Kevin's voice was hoarse. "Get drunk. What happened?" "Punishin' me. But he's your shon, I shay. Not my shon. Jeesh, ya don' have ta shcream. Takin' everythin! Even th' housh!" His mumbling grew too faint to hear. "Shh, dad, it'll be okay. Just rest, alright?" "Yer a good boy, Jashon." Kevin said. Drunkenly, he looked at me and said, "You too, Jeff." Alarmed, I glanced to Jason, but he seemed not to have noticed. "Just rest, Dad." Kevin didn't answer, but started snoring softly, head resting on the rim of the toilet. We watched him for a few moments, in silence. I was afraid to say anything. What Kevin said in his stupor led me to believe that Sharon had demanded everything. He'd even called me Jeff! He must really be out of it to do that. "What do you guys think?" Jason asked. "Um, about what?" His disgusted look told me what he meant. "I don't know, Jason. It sounds like he talked to Sharon, and it didn't go to well." "Yeah, that's what I got too. She's taking the house?" "I'm not sure she can. At worst it'll be sold and the money split." Jason looked around, as if trying to inspect the house. "This is the only home I've known." "We don't really know what happened, Jason," Pete said. "Let's not make any assumptions here. Once dad is back on his feet, we'll figure things out. Right now, let's just take care of him." Jason gave a sad smile. The next fifteen minutes seemed an eternity. We heard Dad come in the house. "Brian?" "Up here, Dad!" He took the stairs two at a time and walked in the bedroom. When he set eyes on Kevin's pitiful form, he groaned. "Oh, Kevin, why didn't you call me?" Dad looked him over for a few minutes, then said, "Why don't you boys go to bed. You look like you're exhausted. I'll take over here, get him cleaned up and in bed. No, I don't want to hear any argument." "But-" "Jason, I mean it. I'll take over." "I just want to help!" Dad smiled gently. "I know you do, son. You have. But in the morning, your dad is going to have a tremendous hangover, and he'll need help then, too. Okay? You can help then." Reluctantly, Jason nodded. He walked to where Kevin rested and whispered something in his ear, then retreated to the bathroom to clean himself up. "You two should go to bed, as well. Tomorrow's going to be a rough day, and not just because of what happened tonight. Go on, son. I've got things here." "G'night, Dad." "Goodnight, son." As Pete passed him, my dad pulled him into a rough hug. "And don't think I've forgotten my other son. Goodnight, Pete." Pete smiled. "Night, Dad." --ooOOoo- The next morning, Pete and I woke earlier than I thought we would, having stayed up past two the night before. We decided to go for a run. It wasn't anything huge, just a short run to get the blood moving and the muscles working again. When we returned, we lifted some weights in the workroom, then we showered and got dressed for the day. Kevin's door was still shut, as was Jason's. It was just after nine when Jason came downstairs to join us for breakfast. He looked like he had a hangover, too. "Morning, Bro. How are you feeling?" Pete asked. "I couldn't sleep, and I have a headache. Is there any Tylenol down here?" "Let me check. Want some pancakes?" "Sure." Pete tossed a pill bottle to Jason, who barely caught it in time. "Boy," I said, "You are the worse for wear. What kept you awake?" "Last night. All of it." I smiled sympathetically. "Do you expect David to call you?" "I don't know." Jason sighed. "He was really messed up last night. And with the...." Jason stopped speaking abruptly, making a show of opening the pill bottle. "With the what?" "His parents will be here tomorrow. Not much time for him to make arrangements." "He hates them that much?" Jason nodded. He seemed relieved somehow. "Yeah. He spent ten minutes cursing them when we were back in his room. I tried to comfort him, you know? He told me not to touch him, and to go home." That doesn't sound like much, I thought. Jason was pissed last night. If that's all it was, Jason's big enough to understand that kind of thing. "How many pancakes, Jason?" "Four to start, okay?" "Sure. Maybe you should go back to bed after you eat. We can handle things." "No, I have to help with Dad." "I doubt there will be much to help with, bro," Pete said. "Just giving him water and watching him sleep. And maybe throw up again." "We'll see. Your dad come down yet, Bri?" "No, not that I know of. We went for a run and did some lifting, so he may have come down while we were out." "Oh, okay. I'll go up and check on them then." Jason stood to go, but Pete cleared his throat. "Breakfast first, bro." "Yes, daddy." "Get yourself some OJ." "I'll get it," I said. "Thanks, Bri." "Sure." Jason sat there just long enough to eat his pancakes and gulp down a glass of orange juice. As soon as he was done, he darted upstairs, but came back down a moment later. "They're both asleep." "See? They probably won't wake up until noon," Pete said as he put the dishes in the dishwasher. "Hope not. Dad's gonna have a killer of a headache." Jason sat back down and steepled his fingers in thought. "You know, I think this is the first time I've ever seen my dad drunk." "He wasn't drunk last night, Jason," I said, "he was sloshed! How much was left in that bottle anyway?" "I dunno. I think it was about three-quarters full. He said he was working late last night. I wonder what time he got home?" Pete asked, "Has anyone checked the office?" "Not really," I replied, "I just ran in to use the phone." Glancing at the wall where the kitchen phone was, I was surprised to see nothing but the phone jack there. "Look at that!" Jason and Pete followed my gaze. Pete gave a low whistle. "Guess we found out where he got the call." He stood and looked for the phone. He finally found it in the utility room, the pieces strewn about the floor. A dent in the washer was revealed by bare sheet metal showing through freshly chipped paint. "Take a look at this! Man, he must have been pissed." Jason stared at the shattered phone in stunned disbelief. "Uh, Jason?" "Yeah?" "Are you okay?" He looked up at me. "Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" "Just making sure." "I just can't believe Dad did this. Other than that fight we had down south that one time, I've never seen him get physically violent." Pete said, "He's had plenty of provocation, I'd say." "Yeah. I feel sorry for him." I responded, "I feel sorry for all of you. This isn't easy for you, I know, Jase." "I'm okay right now. Just worried about Dad, is all." "Well, don't worry about me." "Dad! Are you all right?" Kevin stood at the door, Dad half supporting him by the elbow. "Other than being incredibly stupid and still half drunk, I'm okay." He gingerly made his way to a chair, which Pete pulled out for him. "God, I love Crown Royal. Only have a small headache." "Well, Kev, you're dehydrated," my dad said. "Wait until I start feeding you water. You get to be drunk all over again." "Ah, the gift that keeps on giving. Just don't make me puke again." I couldn't help but laugh. "That's not up to me. Pete? Get him some water, please?" "Sure thing." Jason asked, "Is there anything I can do for you, Dad?" "Yes. Call Van and tell him I won't be in. As if he couldn't figure it out with as late as it is already. Thank you, Pete." Kevin downed half the glass and returned it to Pete for a refill. "Other than that, I can't think of anything. "Hey Ben, don't you have to be at work?" "I talked to my boss last night. He told me to take care of you." Kevin snorted. "I'm fine now." "We'll see after you have a couple more glasses of water." The phone rang upstairs. Pete sprinted to the office to answer it. Kevin glanced up at the bare phone jack and shook his head. Jason asked, "What happened last night, Dad?" Kevin sighed. "I came home earlier than I thought I would because I reached a good place to stop. When I opened the door, the phone was ringing, and it was your mother." "She's not my mother." Kevin ignored that. "We... had an argument, and she hung up on me. I lost control, and apparently ripped the phone off the wall. I think I threw it into the laundry room, but I'm not sure. Don't remember it too clearly." "Jason!" Pete called, "Phone!" "Be there in a second! What happened next, Dad?" "Well, I needed a drink, and that turned into another, and another, and... well... I don't remember anything after that." "How much was in the bottle before you started drinking?" "I don't know. Maybe two thirds full? Why?" "You, um, finished it." "Really?" Kevin grinned. "I haven't done anything like that since college!" The guy actually seemed proud of his accomplishment! "Jason!" "Coming! I gotta take this phone call." "Sure, son." Jason ran upstairs, and Pete came back into the kitchen. "What'd I miss?" "Kevin's confession." "Oh, man! I wanted to hear it." "Nothing exciting," I said. Pete looked at Kevin. "Uh, Dad?" "Yes, son?" "What was the argument about?" "Among other things, what's going to happen to the house. She's demanding her half." "I don't understand something," Pete said. "What's that, son?" "Why is she being so vindictive?" "I don't really know. I think... well, maybe she's slipped a bit mentally. I told you she never really got over Jeff's suicide. Maybe hearing that Jason could have helped prevent it pushed her over the edge. Every other word was about Jason. She's obsessed with it." "What are you going to do?" "Take her to court. What else? Van knows this really good divorce attorney. He's called in a favor to ask him to represent me. Personally I don't like the guy, but he's damn good at his job." Pete asked, "So there's no hope?" "I'm sorry, Pete. I don't see any. This is going to be ugly, and I'm going to have to fight. I have no choice." Kevin was quiet for a few moments, swirling the water around his glass. "Who was on the phone for Jason?" "David." I gave Pete a curious look, and he shrugged slightly. "Drink, Kevin," Dad interrupted. "If you're lucky, the rebound will make you sleep through the rest of this." "Okay, okay, Ben. Maybe I should go upstairs now before I get re-drunk?" Kevin was grinning again. "Probably a good idea." "Okay. Night, boys." "Sleep well, Dad." "Night, Kevin." Once they were out of earshot, I said, "He seems to be holding up well. Especially considering last night." "Yeah, I suppose." Pete sat next to me, and put his arm around me. "I hope things work out. I hate seeing Kevin like this." "Yeah. Jason, too. What did David have to say?" "He said he wanted to apologize to Jason. And to us." "He owes it to Jason for sure. Do you know what happened between them? I'm certain more than what Jason told us went on. "No clue. Maybe Jason will tell us." "Tell you what?" Jason had returned without us hearing him. "What happened in David's bedroom last night." "I can't. It's between me and him." Pete asked, "Are you going to see him?" Jason nodded. "He's coming over here. We're going to talk. We'll see what happens." "What are you feeling, bro?" "I don't know. Nervous, I guess. Scared." I stood up and hugged Jason. "I know exactly what you mean. We're here." Jason looked down at me and hugged me back. "I know, Bri." Pete and I cleaned up the remains of breakfast, then sat in the living room with Jason as he waited with David. When he walked in, David was a mess. He was wearing the same clothes from last night, and hadn't showered. His face was drawn, almost a grimace of pain. He didn't acknowledge Pete and I, instead he just headed straight up the stairs. Jason, his expression unreadable, followed him up. Pete and I sat on the couch watching the television, fidgeting. We both wanted to know what was going on. I was even more convinced that something important had taken place in David's bedroom that night. A couple hours later, Pete and I were dozing on the couch. Jason hadn't come out of his room in that time. When he did come down around noon, Jason looked relaxed, but he was still obviously worried. "Jason?" "He's sleeping. We had a good talk, Bri." "Everything's okay?" "No, but we're going to work on it. That's what you guys do, right?" I looked down as Pete, sleeping with his head in my lap. So peaceful. I stroked his cheek gently, and murmured, "Yes, Jason. That's exactly what we do." --oo00OO00oo- Constructive criticism welcomed. E-mail dewey@deweywriter.com Please visit my new website: http://deweywriter.com All new chapters are posted there well ahead of Nifty.