Date: Tue, 25 May 1999 23:50:52 EDT From: Phaedrus57@aol.com Subject: Isle of Refuge, Part VI: Young Friends, tt/bb, consensual Caveat: This is a story of love and adventure among a group of teenaged boys. It contains scenes of sexual activities between boys. If this offends you, do not read the story. Please go to some other site. If the laws of your country or locality say that it is illegal for you to read this type of story (i.e. that you are too young to have erotic thoughts or sexual questions and your innocent little mind shouldn't entertain such possibilities as are portrayed in this story), you should obey the law. If you read this story nevertheless, don't get caught! Hide your downloads and delete your history. For obvious reasons, the characters in this story do not practice safe sex. Remember that they are fictional products of my fevered imagination, but the dangers of unprotected sex are real. In this respect, I hope that readers will not follow their example. Enjoy the story, which will go on for many chapters. I hope that it will appeal to your minds and hearts. It isn't primarily a sex story, although it has its erotic moments. Comments are welcome and strongly requested. Flames will be ignored. E-mail me at phaedrus57@aol.com. This story is dedicated to the memory of my beloved foster son David, who died of AIDS in 1992, a week before his twenty-ninth birthday. EDITORIAL NOTE: Those who want an analytical framework for understanding the recent school shootings in Colorado and Georgia should read the book REAL BOYS: Rescuing Our Sons from the Myths of Boyhood, by the brilliant psychologist William Pollack (Random House, 1998--revised edition now available in paperback). The book also includes an enlightened and sensible discussion of gay adolescents (Chapter 9). Pollack described the tormented, suicidal boys who committed these acts as "crying bullets", actng out their despair through violence because it is the only mode of expression legitimized for boys by our culture. This is a very helpful and thought-provoking book. EVERYONE who cares about boys should read it! Isle of Refuge Chapter VII: At the Campsite Francois leaned against Mike as they watched the other boys begin the climb up the bank of the waterfall toward the hilltop. As soon as Joey, the last boy, disappeared they embraced each other tightly and began a long, passionate kiss. Without releasing each other or breaking their kiss, they were soon lying on the blanket that was still spread out at the foot of the large tree at the center of the campsite. "I need you inside me, Fran!" Mike said breathlessly. "I love you, Mike! You can have me any way you want," Francois whispered. They were lying face to face, wrapped in each other's arms, holding each other close, caressing each other's backs and buttocks. Mike gently pushed Francois onto his back and began slowly licking and kissing his way down Francois' smooth ebony chest and belly. Francois sighed with pleasure as Mike kissed the foreskin of his half-erect penis and then took much of the penis in his mouth. At the same time, Mike began to stroke the dark skin of Francois' inner thighs, and then to fondle his testicles gently. Francois groaned as Mike's finger touched his anus. When Francois' penis was completely erect and dripping with his saliva, Mike got to his knees and straddled Francois' hips. "Let me loosen you up a little, baby. I don't want to hurt you," Francois said softly, moistening a finger and pushing gently with it on Mike's anal ring. Gradually Mike's sphincter relaxed and yielded, first to one slender brown finger and then to two. "Okay, I'm ready!" Mike said, aligning his anus with Francois' hard, slick penis. Francois began to stroke Mike's penis as Mike lowered himself. Mike's buttocks were soon pressing down on Francois' pubic hairs. Both boys were moaning ecstatically. Mike began to move up and down on Francois' penis as Francois stroked him. Both boys gradually increased their tempos. Mike felt his entire body tingle and tremble as Francois' penis repeatedly touched his prostate. "Baby, I'm going to cum!" Mike gasped. His eyes closed. He saw bright lights. He felt as if he were floating several feet above the ground. The universe was reduced to him and his lover. He felt rivers of fluid shooting from the end of this penis. Francois felt Mike's sphincter contract. The hot, tight sheathe that encased his penis squeezed it more tightly. Little jolts of electricity seemed to radiate through his body. He and Mike became one person as he ejaculated again and again into his lover's body. Time stopped. The world was suffused with a soft, golden light. Mike fell forward into Francois' waiting arms. He felt momentarily empty as Francois penis deflated and slipped out of him, but the warmth of his lover's body and the heat of his lips immediately filled his heart as they kissed. He had never felt so close to anyone. He felt utterly defenseless and vulnerable and at the same time completely safe and secure. He knew that tears were flowing from his eyes. He didn't care. He felt Francois' chest tremble and convulse. He opened his eyes to see through the blur of his own tears that his lover was sobbing. "Are you okay, Fran?" Mike whispered. "Am I okay? Mike, sweetheart, I never thought I could be this happy! I never dreamed it was possible to feel like this!" "I know, baby, I know!" Francois let out a deep sigh. Mike pressed his face to his lover's. Their tears and their breaths mingled. They felt each other's heartbeat. They were utterly content. They lay together for minutes or hours or days, they had no idea which. They dozed and awoke, drowsy but joyful. "Don't ever leave me, Mike, no matter what happens," Francois said at last. "I want to be with you forever, Fran. I don't want us to ever be apart!" Mike responded. "You're part of me and I'm part of you," Francois said, looking deeply into Mike's eyes. "Forever and ever, Fran! Forever and ever!" Mike answered softly. Mike tried to get up, only to find that his semen had dried into glue between their bodies. Francois began to chortle, and soon both boys were laughing hysterically. "We sure got that right!" Francois gasped between peals of laughter. "Yeah! We'll be like Siamese twins joined at the cock!" Mike managed to blurt out. Eventually the two boys managed to separate with out tearing off any large pieces of skin. Mike supported Francois as they went into the pool, where they scrubbed each other's bodies lovingly and very thoroughly, laughing quietly and stopping frequently for hugs and kisses. They had completely lost track of time, and when they came out of the water they saw that the sun was directly overhead. "I'm gonna go find some wood and make you a crutch," Mike said. He helped Francois sit down on the blanket and went in search of a strong, straight, dry branch. It only took him a few minutes to find one, and soon he and Francois were cutting and shaping the wood to serve their purpose. Within an hour, Mike's woodworking skills had produced a rough but serviceable crutch of just the right length. For the first time since their arrival on the island, Francois was able to move about on his own. Mike felt great pride and pleasure to have given his lover such an important gift. At the same time, he would miss being Francois' human "crutch". But he knew now that he and Francois would have all the physical contact that either desired; they didn't need an excuse to touch and show affection. Mike and Francois walked into the forest near the campsite to find some fruit for lunch. Francois had to move slowly, with Mike nearby to support him when necessary, but he was extremely happy that he could help and also begin to explore his surroundings. The trees near the campsite had mostly been picked clean, and the boys had to range further and further afield to forage for food. Mike and Francois made their way downhill to the beach, where they noticed that some bits and pieces of the wrecked Venture had washed ashore. Half buried in the sand was a large piece of the boat's transom. As Mike and Francois dug it out, they exposed the gilt lettering: V E N T U R E East Boothbay, Maine "Let's take it back up to the campsite!" Francois said excitedly. Mike saw a substantial piece of oak paneling, probably from the bulkhead of the main cabin. "Kewl! I can use this to make Chris's grave marker!" he exclaimed. In a few minutes, Mike and Francois had made a sizable pile of usable scraps of wood and metal, and they could see more wreckage scattered along the beach. "We should get everyone down here tomorrow to gather what we can," Mike said. When they had found and eaten some fruit, they dragged the transom and a few other choice pieces up to Tommy's Falls. With Francois' assistance, Mike began making the marker for Chris's grave. Mike had a good eye and a steady hand. He had only one small knife to work with, so each letter took a long time to carve deeply into the hard wood. But the letters were neat and evenly spaced, and both boys agreed that the plaque was beginning to look very professional. Mike had carved: CHRISTOPHER NGUYEN 1984-1998 "Below this I want to carve `We Love You. Rest in Peace'," Mike said. "Does that sound okay?" "Yeah! Just right!" Francois answered. Mike began to carve these phrases, but found himself blinded by tears. Francois looked at him in alarm and asked, "Mike, are you okay?" He paused and, understanding, put his arm around Mike's shoulders. "I know. I miss him, too," he said, tears running down his own face now. "It was so hard to watch him die like that. I never really saw anyone die before. It isn't like TV or a movie. It was someone we knew and cared about. It coulda been you or me!" Mike said. "That's why we hafta remember him. We were like his family. It's like wherever he is now, he's still part of us because we remember," Francois responded. "When my father was dying, I didn't know what was going on, so I never said goodbye or told him I loved him. Since then, I've always felt like there's this big empty place inside me. I've wanted to talk to him so many times, but it's like I don't know where he is. We couldn't afford a gravestone, so I can't even find him in the cemetery. When they took my mom to the hospital, I wanted to tell him, but I didn't know how." Both boys were crying now, grieving for Chris and the other losses in their lives. They held each other closely, comforting each other with their affection and total empathy. As they calmed down, Mike said softly, "Fran, I'm just so glad that you're here! I'm so lucky we found each other! I've never had anyone to cry with me when I was sad. My father always tried to make me ashamed to feel sad or cry, like the solution to everything was to punch somebody out like a `real man'. Until we loved each other, I've always felt alone." Francois took a deep breath and said, "I'm the one who's lucky, Mike. You're the first person to make me feel like I'm not a freak or a pervert. I always tried so hard to be good, but I couldn't stop having these feelings about guys. I thought I must be really bad. When my family fell apart, I thought it was my fault, like we were all being punished for my sins. I felt as if I deserved to be locked up like I was. Father O'Malley convinced me that God didn't punish people that way, but then he kept telling me that I had to resist the way I felt. In his own way, I think he really cared about me, but he made me feel like I was `unnatural'. Liking boys was natural to me. I couldn't help it. But being here, seeing how Richard and Kevin are with each other, having you love me, I feel like maybe there's hope for me. I just love you so much!" By this time, Francois was sobbing again, as Mike held him close. "You're the best, Fran. Don't let anyone tell you you're not!" Mike said with passionate conviction. Mike and Francois lay in each other's arms inhabiting the space of security and warmth that they had created together in the past two days. They kissed from time to time and ran comforting hands across each other's bodies. Francois gently traced the scar at the bottom of Mike's belly, and Mike smiled when he realized that for the first time since the night his father had attacked him he hadn't thought about the scar all day. He squeezed Francois especially close and kissed him on the lips. They needed no words. The intimacy of their bond transcended sexual need and shared pleasure. They went back to work on Chris's grave marker. They decided that the epitaph should read: Always Remembered Always Loved Rest in peace They had just finished their task and were contemplating the plaque with shared pride when Terry, followed by all the other boys, clambered down the bank of the waterfall and walked toward them across the campsite. The boys who had gone to the hilltop were caked with grime and sweat. Miguel was carrying Tommy on his back. They all seemed very tired. When Tommy was on his own feet again, Mike and Francois noticed the many bruises and abrasions on his back and buttocks. "What happened?" Mike and Francois asked together. Richard, slightly out of breath, replied, "Give us a chance to get cleaned up and we'll tell you." Soon the boys were in the pool scrubbing themselves and each other. Terry, Joey, and Angelo stood under the waterfall, enjoying the massaging effect of the cool water on their tired muscles. Miguel had found some antiseptic in the first aid kit, and was gently cleaning Tommy's cuts and bruises. Even though he winced and groaned from time to time, the little boy appreciated the loving care he received, especially when Miguel kissed each cut after he scrubbed it. Tommy couldn't remember much about his mother, but he had often fantasized that a mother would care for him as Miguel often did. His head still ached and he was drowsy. He didn't object at all when Miguel carried him out of the water and onto the blanket still spread at the base of the big tree. Within a few minutes Tommy was asleep in Miguel's arms. "You did a really good job getting him cleaned up, Miguel. After a good sleep, he should be fine," Richard said after inspecting Tommy's wounds. Miguel beamed with pride and kissed Tommy's forehead. Mike and Francois had gone on another food gathering expedition while the other boys were bathing. After a long and strenuous day, everyone was content to sit and eat. Those who had been to the hilltop were eager to regale Mike and Francois with their accounts of the day's adventures, which grew more dramatic in the telling. Everyone admired Mike's craftsmanship in Chris's grave marker and Francois' crutch. It was dusk when they had finished eating, and Mike gathered wood and started a fire in the center of the campsite, more for light and comfort than for heat. "So it doesn't look very likely that we'll be rescued right away," Richard concluded his description of the prospect from the hilltop. "There are no other islands nearby, and we couldn't see any ships or boats. They may search for us because we didn't arrive in Brisbane as scheduled, but who knows if they had any idea of Venture's position? Where would they begin to look?" "Is that so bad?" Joey said. "No one's gonna miss me. My aunt and uncle have probably had my funeral already, and they're glad they don't even hafta pay to bury me. I'm better off here." He and Angelo sat leaning against Terry, who had an arm wrapped protectively around each of them. Terry gave Joey a comforting squeeze and rubbed his stomach affectionately. Tommy, feeling much better after his nap and some fruit, said, "If we go back, they'll just put me in another group home. There aren't enough foster homes for kids my age. An' I couldn't be with Miguel. We don't even come from the same state. An' if we try to be together, they'll just say we're faggots `cause we love each other." Richard said, "But Tommy, what if you'd been really hurt today? I couldn't have done anything for you. I get sick to my stomach when I think about that." "I don't even have a home to go back to, and Mike and I aren't safe in each other's neighborhoods. It took us our whole lives to find each other, and we're just not gonna be apart ever again. But if we're rescued, we'll be powerless. We won't have control over where we are or who we're with, or anything. And no one's gonna accept that we need to be together, just like Tommy said," Francois rejoined. "I'm not crazy about going back to live with my father in the projects in Somerville, but I want to finish high school and go to college and make something of myself," Kevin said. "I mean, we can have fun and learn stuff here, and I really like us being together, but do we really want to spend our whole lives here? What happens when we get older? We sure won't have any kids, and eventually we'll just die off one by one. Who wants to be the last one to die?" Everyone was quiet for a few minutes, gazing contemplatively into the fire, snuggling a little closer to friends and lovers. Joey, usually reticent, broke the silence. "It's easier for you and Richard, Kevin. When Richard's at Harvard, you'll only be a couple of miles away. You can go see him on your bicycle anytime you want. Richard's got his trust fund and Harvard. He can do what he wants. Me, I go home to get fucked by my brothers and go to a high school that doesn't even have an art program." Richard said thoughtfully, "I hear you, Joey. Yeah, I've had all the privileges. My parents don't really give a shit about me, but my grandparents set things up so I'll never have to worry about supporting myself. So I've had the best upbringing money could buy. But now I know what I want to do with all that freedom. I want to make life better for you guys and other kids like you. If we get back, you'll have to help me figure out how to do that. But you guys will always be my real family, wherever we are. I'm just not gonna let this shit happen to you." "Richard, we know you care about us, and we trust you," Terry said, "but it isn't that simple, dude. You can't take on the whole world. I mean, like, you're only sixteen. You've got money but not power. How're you gonna make people understand? What makes you think anyone cares?" "I wish I could answer those questions, but I can't," Richard answered slowly. By this time Tommy was asleep again, and Miguel's eyelids were growing heavy. There were yawns all around. Kevin and Richard helped Tommy and Miguel find their way onto the blanket, where they curled up together. The three thirteen-year-olds crawled into their hammock, giggling and cuffing each other as usual. Richard and Kevin, arms around each other, beckoned Mike and Francois toward them. Richard said, "We're so happy for you guys. I hope you had a terrific day!" Mike and Francois held each other close and looked into each other's eyes. Mike said, "We had a great day!" Francois added, "Yeah! We really did. But we'd never have found each other if it hadn't been for you two. Thanks for showing us the way!" There were grins and hugs and kisses all around. Mike and Francois crawled into their hammock. Kevin and Richard lay down in each other's arms on the blanket beside Tommy and Miguel. The embers of the fire died down and flickered out. Soon all the boys were asleep.