Date: Tue, 15 Aug 2000 14:54:03 GMT From: josie fish Subject: Jeremy and Jackson His hot, sexy breath warmed my face as i leaned against the bathroom door, with him looking at me with those intense blue eyes of his. God, he's beautiful! I thought for my self. He's about 6 feet tall and i guess weigh about 130 pounds. He has light blond hair, the same hair style that Taylor Hanson has today and light blue eyes that would make me do "ANYTHING" for him. I was so lost in his eyes that i hardly didn't noticed him brushing away some lose brown stripes of hair that had fallen down to my eyes. There, now i can see those lovely emerald eyes of yours. He said warmly, with a smile on his face. I blushed and smiled nervously but then his expression turned to something different, to something more serious. He tilted his head to the left and pressed my slender body against the door, hard enough to make me yelp.His hands were planted firmly on my shoulders and i could feel his mint breath as he leaned in closer. His red moist lips meet mine with the softest and most innocent touch. Our mouth were barely open and only small smacks could be heard. I felt his hands travel down my spine slowly and he left them on the small of my back for a while before he traveled down to my butt which he squeezed gently. I was soooo insecure of my self, i didn't really know what to do with my hands, so i just lingered them in his soft blond hair. He moaned silently before breaking our first kiss. I just stood there completely lost in our kiss that we had chared, i couldn't belive that i just had kissed a BOY! I was hoping that this would happen. He whispered softly to me, while caressing my chest. I've been in love with you for quite some time but i didn't think that you were gay. GAY! That word just started to echo through my head the minute he said it. I started panicking, i couldn't breath, the walls were closing in on me and obviously he saw that something was wrong cause he asked me to sit down. I just ran away! Keep on going Jackson! I told my self silently as i walked the long way home from school. My face was completely numb by the cold air that always seemed to blow through Dublin. I put my read fingers in my jeans pockets and just tried to focus on my black winter boots. each step was one step close to home. I couldn't take the school bus today, not with "HIM" being there. I just didn't know how to think or how to feel. I mean you're suppose to know but i didn't know and know i kinda knew and that scared the hell out of me. Finally! I thought as i stood by the gate to our appartment. I looked up to the 4:th floor and i could see that the light in the kithen was on, so i knew that my mum most be home. Oh my GOD!!!!!!!!!!! What, what would my mum think OR my kid brother that see me both as his father and brother??? Fuck, this can't be happening, it was just a misstake, i'am not gay, i'am not gay,i,am, NOT, gay...... I took a deep breath , before i opened the gate, my foot steps echoed as i walked up all the twenty steps before reaching the door. Hi mum! I yelled as i entered the door. There was no reply. Maybe she is down at the basement. i mumbled to my self as i pulled my hands through my brown hair. I kicked off my boots and threw my black leader jacket on the white bureau. I went in to the kitchen to get a glas of milk and then headed to my room. Jeremy!!! I said in shocked voice. Well this is the first chapter of my story. All comments are welcome good as bad! Take care! Josie yellowfish_suck@hotmail.com