Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 15:03:43 -0500
From: Jay Kool <jaykool74@hotmail.com>
Subject: My So Called Life - Chapter 13

"My So Called Life" -- Chapter Thirteen by Jay Kool (jaykool74@hotmail.com)

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	My accident with Jason actually cheered me up a little bit and made
me realize that David was probably keeping our secret and not outing me to
the whole school.  I was still a bit dazed from realizing that I actually
had a little bit of a crush on Jason.  He wasn't the most charming or
glamorous guy in the world but he was extremely cute and funny.  I'm pretty
certain that he's straight since I've never noticed him checking out guys,
but then again I've never noticed him checking out the girls either.  Maybe
he wasn't quite mature enough physically, I guess I should try to check him
out the next time that we are changing for gym class.
	I finished the rest of the day a bit more normal, well if you can
ever call me normal, than when I started.  I rode the bus home where I
still sat alone, afraid of what Dave's reaction would be to me trying to
sit near him on the bus.  I thought that I may be acting childish but I
didn't know how to react.  This is the first breakup that my young frail
heart has had to endure, let alone dealing with the stress of a new school
to get used to and my dad taking off to marry some other woman.
	After walking off the bus I walked home and made my way up to my
room where I decided that I needed to do some homework to keep my grades up
so my mother wouldn't flip out.  I was starting to think that I would need
take some Ritalin or something (not that I had any) to concentrate when I
was reminded by my hardness that I hadn't cum in over two weeks.  I figured
that maybe that would help me to relax and concentrate.  I locked my
bedroom door and got onto my bed in a bit of a hurry where I decided just
to yank my pants and underwear to down below my balls.  I put a little hand
lotion in my hand and slowly started to massage my cock imagining that I
was kissing Jason and that he was kissing me back while grinding into me.
I think that I shot in record time spewing my sperm up over my head on the
first shot before cumming on my face, neck, chest (incidentally covered by
my shirt) and the last drop landed right above my pubic hairs.  I admit
that it felt so good and now I felt so spent and wanted to take a nap, but
I realized that I probably should get cleaned up before mom gets home from
work.  After cleaning up I unlocked my door before lying back down on my
bed and starting a nap.
	My mother arrived home unbeknownst to me and came up to check up on
me and to see how my day went.  She decided to let me have my nap and to
prepare dinner (or supper as people refer to it down here).  She came back
up and woke me up when it was time to eat and I almost told her that I
wasn't hungry before realizing that I was going to have a serious weight
problem if I kept skipping meals.  My mother asked how my clothes were
fitting and I told her that they were a bit loose; she was trying to find
an excuse to take me clothes shopping.  She mentioned that I probably
wasn't growing since I wasn't eating.
	I asked her if it would be okay if I invited one of my friends to
spend a weekend sometime to which she said it would be nice to see me
happy, but my friend couldn't be a trouble maker.  I told her that I was
thinking of asking Jason to come and she asked me if my intentions were
romantic.  She laughed as I stared at her with my mouth gaping and my face
turning absolutely red and I admit that the thought of him made me hard as
a rock.  She then prodded me stating that she was still waiting for an
answer, to which she already knew the answer by how I was acting.  I
couldn't hide anything from her, she could read me like a book and she knew
every button of mine to push to get a desired response that she wanted from
me, even when I was throwing one of my "teenage tantrums" as she called it.
	Amazingly enough she started to give me the sex talk at the dinner
table, and to say the least I was completely speechless and embarrassed.
She told me that I should wait until I was absolutely positively beyond a
reasonable doubt completely in love with a person before I made love to
them or in my case that they made love to me.
  I guess love meant going all the way in this context but wasn't going to
tell her what was on my mind.  What was going all of the way with a guy?
She reminded me that it would be all too easy to get hurt emotionally or
physically.  I almost felt like asking her a few questions about sex but I
felt really uncomfortable with her being my mother, and I didn't think
she'd want to answer questions about gay sex.
	My mom thought it was adorable how embarrassed I was when she was
talking to me about sex.  I told her that I knew where babies came from
that dad already gave me that talk, but she told me that was the straight
sex talk, not the gay sex talk.  I was shocked and she sensed it and said
that it was okay.  She did some preliminary research on the internet so
that she could talk intelligently with me and answer any questions that I
may have.  She also told me to be careful about whom I decided to come out
to that I may encounter someone who would want to harm me physically after
finding out.  My mind was spinning; this was a lot to take in without being
prepared to talk about sex.  How many gay kids get a sex talk from their
mom at the dinner table out of the blue?  I'm probably the only person on
the planet.
	Just when I thought that the questioning and the sex talk were
done, my mother asked if my intentions with Jason were romantic or not.
Damn I'm not going to be able to dodge this question or subject.  What was
I supposed to do here, act like a silly school girl and tell her how
awesome I thought this boy was?  Should I lie?  Or should I tell her that I
wanted him to make out with me naked until we came on each other?  I'm not
sure young boys should talk to their parents about these things, no matter
how cool our parents are.  It just doesn't seem right.
	Eventually I relented to her endless barrage of questioning and
told her that I had a crush on him, that I thought that he was totally
cute, cool and funny and that he was the one that invited me back to
sitting with my group of friends.  I also told her that it hurt every time
I saw or thought of David and that I didn't know if I'd ever be able to
fall in love again before I got up from the table running up to my room
where I slammed the door shut throwing myself on my bed crying myself to
sleep yet another night of my life.  I guess she felt bad for the
interrogation of my love life and checked up on me but I was sleeping on my
stomach and never noticed.  She apologized the next morning when she came
to wake me up for school.
	The rest of the week at school was better even though Dave was
still ignoring me, because the rest of my group of friends was talking with
me.  Jason was becoming my new best friend slowly without any noticeable
objection from David.  I thought better of asking Jason to spend the
weekend, I figured I could use the alone time to catch up on school work,
even though it wasn't hard.  My mind was the clearest it had been in weeks
and it only took me a few hours to get caught up for the nights of homework
I missed.
	I then locked my door and booted up my computer to log onto the
internet.  I decided to research about making gay love.  I admit that I
must seem really stupid, but I wasn't going to ask my mother and I didn't
have any other credible source of information besides the internet.  I
spent a few hours sorting through websites ranging from about how to
protect you during sex to sites explaining how gay sex is performed to
erotic and porno sites.  I ended up masturbating for the second time that
day; I guess the internet does have other uses besides educational.  My
mother should've guessed that telling me about her use of the internet to
research gay sex that I would do the same.  Maybe the porno links didn't
come up in the search engine at school.  I went to bed afterwards and slept
peacefully for the night except for a wet dream about Jason and I having
sex.


If you like this story series so far, you may want to read my other fiction
story series:

Gay --> high school --> Music Store Teens
Bi --> college --> College Firsts

Any non-flamer feedback is welcome, email me at jaykool74@hotmail.com