The Root Beer Boys
The Root Beer Boys
Chapter Fifteen - Andy's Diary
I can't believe it, di. I do something wrong and Wayne asks me for forgiveness. Will life make sense when I'm older?
I broke the rules and found out my dad loves me even more than I thought he ever could. I give something to another boy that was supposed to be Wayne's and Wayne steps in and offers to take my punishment for me.
I'm not sure I can handle this kind of love. How am I supposed to deal with this? Dad says that to truly feel the forgiveness of others, we have to be able to forgive ourselves. Maybe writing all this down will help me do that, forgive myself. I know Wayne has forgiven me for what Bobby and I did. And he doesn't blame Bobby either. How can I handle that kind of love, diary?
Mom and Dad were outside talking on the patio. They thought I was still in my room where I couldn't hear them. But I had gone to the bathroom and then to the kitchen for a drink of water. I was standing on the back porch, listening to them when Dad said what he did about passing on his genes to me. Can you believe it diary? He actually forgot I'm adopted! Shit, just typing that makes me cry. How could he love me that much, even after what I did?
And when he was spanking me, on my bare butt no less, Wayne came in and stopped him. He actually laid himself across my back to prevent Dad from being able to hit me. He was willing to take the licks I deserved. Even after I had cheated on him and then hit him with my fist. I gave him a black eye, diary! I hurt him! The boy I love! How could I have done that?!
Oh Diary, I love him so much. After Dad left, he helped me out of my clothes and into bed. My bottom really did hurt. Dad has a big hand and was pretty effective with it. But while a lot of my tears were tears of love and disappointment in myself, the pain in my bottom was real enough. As I laid there in Wayne's arms, I felt him running his hand soothingly across my stinging cheeks. He didn't mean anything sexual about it, and I didn't respond to it sexually either. But it sure felt good, both physically and emotionally.
I asked him again to forgive me and thanked him for what he had just done. And he amazed me more by what he said next.
"Andy, when we make love that way, there will be four parts to what we do. When you put your penis in me you will be giving me a part of yourself that is so special, and I will be giving you my bottom, too. Something no one else has ever had or will ever have. And when I put my penis in you, you will be giving me your bottom, something no one else has ever had, and I will be giving you a part of me that is so special. That's four parts, Andy, and three of them will be the very first, the original. Three out of four ain't bad, and even the fourth isn't really far from being original. I'm a virgin both ways. You're only a virgin one way. But you're still a virgin emotionally, sweetheart. Bobby didn't get that part of you. That part belongs only to me."
What can I say, diary? I cried myself to sleep in his arms.
... to be continued
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