Date: Thu, 4 Dec 2003 02:34:19 -0800 (PST) From: little bit Subject: Skeeter and Kyle Chapter 4 After talking to Kyle the day I got released from Pine Woods nut house my whole life seemed to turn around for the better. Kyle and I had set up to meet the following weekend which we did. Kyle got to my place around 6PM and at first things were alittle tense. After about 2 hours or so Kyle and I began to warm up to each other after such a long time apart it wasnt easy for us to do. We were both scared that at any time we would wake up and it all be a dream. I am not going to say things went smooth and everything was great becuase that would be a lie. Shortly after we began to get used to being around one another again, Kyle told me he needed to talk to me in private. We then went into my room and sat on the bed to talk. He began by saying he never thought he would see me again and that at first he had tried to kill himself several times. He then went on to tell me that after about a month things started to get better and he had started dating a girl. I was crushed, not only had I spent all the time we were apart crying but also in the nut house. Only to find out that after a month he was fine and dandy and was dating not just anyone but a girl. To explain why this bothered me so badly I need to explain that I have allways since day one been afraid that a girl would be able to take Kyle from me. Not because he didnt love me or want to be with me but because she could give him things that I never could. She was able to give him a normal life, kids, and he would be able to look his family in the eyes and not be afraid of thier reaction. All these are things that I would never be able to give him. Well he went on to tell me that he had also slept with her and didnt know if he could go back to what we had. I started to cry and left the house. I didnt know what to say to him, I mean what could I say. I stayed gone for a few hours and hoped that he would be gone when I returned to never be seen or heard from again, but this wasnt to be. When I walked in the house the first thing I saw was him walking over to me telling me how sorry he was. I promptly told him to fuck off and get out of my house. He refused. So I then decided to make him leave, I went to my room and began to pack all the things I had of his that I had held so closely over the past few months and told him that if he wanted any of it then he needed to get it now or it would go in the trash. He got pissed and told me he didnt want anything I had of his or had given him. So I loaded all his belongings into the trunk of my car and told him to get in and I left to drive him home. More then once during the ride to his house he tried to speak to me. I just told him I didnt want to hear it and that nothing he had to say mattered any more. On the way to his house I stopped in at the dump and tossed all his stuff with him sitting in the car. 10 minutes later he was getting out at his house beging me not to do this, I just reached over and closed the car door and left. The next day was rough but I made it through it. I was hurt beyond words to know that someone I had loved so much could just move on and think nothing of it. I was hurt and pissed. Kyle had a kid he knew in school named Donnie that he hated simply because he had a crush on me so I did what came natural. I started dating and sleeping with Donnie. After about a week Kyle found out and him and Donnie got into a hugh fight in school for which Donnie stompped him all over the school. About a month later Kyle called me and asked me if we could meet and talk, I told him I didnt want to see him. He then began to cry and said he really wanted to work things out to where we could atleast be friends that he couldnt handle not seeing me. I agreed. I met him at a store right up from his house. We sat down to talk and he tried to hug me for which I just pushed him away and told him that he had no right to touch me in a familiar manner. He then sat down and began to cry. He started crying and saying he was sorry for what he had done that at the time he didnt know what else to do. I asked him why this should matter to me. He said, Skeeter I love you more then anything or anyone in the world and all I want is to be with you. I told him to get over it that the only thing he loved was being able to say I was his and not Donnies. He started to cry even harder. I started to feel that little twing of quilt from the love I still had for him and reached over to him and told him I was sorry that I shouldnt have said that. After about a hour of us talking we decided to start over and try to make it work. I went home and told Donnie who by this time was living with me and he understood. ( I was amazed he didnt flip out ) Donnie moved out and the following weekend Kyle came to the house to see me. After Kyle had gotten to the house I was not sure what to do or say for we had both hurt the other beyond words. So we just started to talk. I asked him why and how he could date someone else and his answer was that he did it to get me off his mind. He said he had never slept with the girl whos name is Heather I came to find out some weeks later. He told me he had just told me that to hurt me because he felt like I had abanoned him when the police had torn us apart. I explained to him I had no choice in the matter for if I had we would have never been apart. He didnt understand that if I had called or tried to see him I would have been put in jail. After we talked and cried for hours on end we were both emotionally drained and went to bed. As we got into bed Kyle leaned over and ugged my neck and kissed me and told me he loved me. My response was the right one. I told him not to say things he didnt mean and that I didnt want to hear that come out of his mouth again until I knew and felt that he did love me. He cried himself to sleep. The next day we got up and began to work things out the best as we could. We spent the day walking in the woods behind the house and just being with one another. By that evening things were getting better. I had told him I didnt trust him and wouldnt trust him for along time after he had done that. My mom had left the house for the weekend so that Kyle and I would have time to talk and do whatever else we wanted to do. About 5PM we were getting tired from all the walking and talking and laied down to take a nap. Kyle spooned up to me and began to rub my chest. I was loving having him back next to me and the affection he was showing. Until he began to move his hands lower on my body and began to undo my pants. I pushed him away and told him I wasnt ready for that yet. I told him that if we had sex it would just cloud things up and make working out our problems that much harder. He understood and stopped for the time being. After our nap we got up and got something to eat and sat down to play an online game we both lover called EverQuest. I will refer to this game more times in the future of this story. After plaing EQ for about 6 hours we got hungry and I got up to cook us dinner ( I am a Great cook ). We sat down to eat and play at the same time which if you have ever played the game you know this isnt an easy thing to do. We had 4 accounts and 3 comps so we could both play at the same time and be able to group with one another. We did that alot. Kyle and I spent alot of time playing EQ together. On EQ we could be in the same group together and help one another on the game and just spend alot of good time with each other. After playing EQ till about 4AM we decided it was time for bed. Kyle once again tried to push sex for which I shut him down again. THe next day I drove Kyle home. He had asked me on the way home if he could come spend the upcoming holiday with me. I just simply told him I didnt know and wasnt sure that I wanted him to be present at my family get together because it would put me in a awkward situation and make me feel that I had to work things out with him or look the fool to my family. After giving it some thought I called Kyle later that week and told him that he could come for the holiday but I didnt want him to go with me to see my family. He said that was fine and he came over that Friday. By Sunday things were looking alot better for us and when we laied down to sleep I allowed him to do as he wanted and we had sex that night. He agai tried to tell me he loved me and that he had wanted to make love to me to prove it. I just simply told him I didnt want to hear it that it was to soon and that what we had just done may have been making love to him but it was just sex to me. Yes I know this makes me out to be a real ass but trust me as the story goes on you will see why. The following week went as the first few days had. Things were starting to feel right again and it was about time. By Friday we were happy again or so I thought. Friday night about 8PM Rhonda, Kyles mother called. I told her he was in the shower and could I take a message for him. She just asked me to let him know to call Heather. I asked her who Heather was and she just told me she was a friend of Kyles from school. By this point I had allready been told by Donnie that Heather was the name of the girl Kyle had been seeing while I was in the nut house. I knew who she was and didnt want to let on that I knew. I wanted to see what Kyle would have to say about it. Well after he got out of the shower I gave him his message. He grabbed a phone and walked outside. I knew what he was doing and I was now more then pissed. After about 10 minutes Kyle came back inside and acted like nothing was wrong. I knew better. I asked him who Heather was and he just told me she was a friend from school and that he needed to go home the next morning to help his mom out with some stuff around the house. He was supposed to stay till Wensday, This was Friday. So I then asked him what his mom needed help with, He told me sinply just some stuff around the house. I promptly knocked the fuck out of him square in the mouth. After picking himself up off the floor and shacking it off he asked me what the fuck I thought I was doing. I just looked at him and again asked, So who is Heather. Again he lied so again I knocked him on his ass, But this time before he could get up I leaned down looked him striaght in the face and told him I knew that Heather was the girl he had been dating and asked him just why he thought he needed to lie about it. He didnt have an answer. I looked him in the face and asked him. Kyle are you still dating her. He responded no that they were just friends now. I had been around him long enough to know when he was lieing. So I told him to get up and get his shit and leave. I told him that he was nothing more then a lieing cheating piece of shit. That is when he decided to come clean and told me that yes he was dating her. I told him I knew that and that I wasnt dumb. I asked him why he came back to me if he was still with her. He told me that he had stayed dating her so no one would know about us. I was PISSED. I started to scream in his face and lost what little mind I had and asked him just what in the fuck made him think that I wanted some little boy who was affraid to admit to himself and the rest of the world what he was. All this time I had thought Kyle was this rock this brick wall that didnt care what others thought about our being gay and being together. I had been fooled. Kyle was this weak scared little boy who couldnt live knowing that others might think he was gay. I was disgusted. I took him home that night. Kyle tried to call me several times over the next 3 weeks. I didnt answer the phone, I had nothing to say to him. I hated him. He was a lier and that was all there was to it. He didnt care about me or even himself if he could live a lie like that. During the 4th week instead of calling he came over to see me. I had not expected him to be so brave. After all he was just a chicken shit little closet boy.( Take no offense please I was mad at the time ) He asked me to talk and I just told him to fuck off and asked him why I should bother talking to him. He said those 3 little words I had started to hate. Skeeter I love you. I just stared ar him. After a few minutes I looked at him and just simply said well Kyle if you loved me you wouldnt feel like you have to hide me. I turned walked into my home and shut the door. A few days went by and he returned again and asked me to talk. I told him I really didint care to, That as far as I was concerned there was nothing else to talk about. He then called his mom and told her to tell me about Heather. I took the phone and told her I really didnt want to hear her shit either. Rather then nut up on me Rhonda just told me. Skeeter I had asked Kyle to keep dating her so that he wouldnt be in any danger at school from any of the other kids. I told her she was a sick bitch to ask her son to live his life to make hers easier. She then told me that the day that Heather called and I had hit Kyle, That he had come home and told her to go fuck herself that he was gay and was in love with me and that if she didnt like it to bad. I was who and what he wanted in life. He then called Heather and told her not to speak to him or even look his way. That because of her he had lost the one most important thing in his life and when she asked just what was more important then herself in his life he simply told her, Well my boyfriend Skeeter is and hung up the phone. I was stuned to say the least. I was hurt that I had been so cruel to him and wished all this stuff had never happened. We spent that night together. No sex. Just love and affection. Things were right again. I was happy. Kyle and I were not hiding our relationship. This was what I wanted. I would not hide who I was from anyone. I am proud to be who and what I am and allways will be. Well that is it for this section. It is 522AM and WAY past my bedtime. If you want to read more please let me know. elizbit54@yahoo.com Please remember this is a true story and it has along way to go before you will be up to the present. As stated before the only thing changed is my own age. The names towns and all are the real towns and names. Thank you all for reading. Love to all Skeeter