I felt as if my whole world had just fallen apart as I went inside to meet my fate. Danny was nowhere to be seen and when I asked mom where he was she said she she didn't know, then added that she thought he was with me. I lied and said I hadn't seen since we got back from the park. 

I left her in the kitchen and went to find dad and when I did Danny was with him. I almost lost it when I saw them together. If Danny had told dad it was all over for me. I'd probably never see Bastion again and if that was the case I didn't know how I'd go on living.

"Well, there you are," dad said smiling and I relaxed a bit, "is your friend gone?"

"Yes sir," I choked out looking at Danny but he was busy studying his feet all of a sudden, "I just came to see if Danny wanted to play video games."

"Well, we were just about to go shoot some hoops. Why don't you join us?"

"I uh...sure, okay...if you guys want. I don't wanna spoil anything."

"Don't be silly, I want to play with both my boys," dad said smiling warmly.

At least Danny hadn't told dad anything...yet, but maybe he was planning on doing it while playing basketball. If so then he'd have to put it off if I joined them.

"Okay," I agreed, "for a while anyway."

Danny barely looked at me that whole time we played and when I got close to him he seemed to scoot away each time as if I were contagious. My gut was all torn up and I was shaking so much I could barely make a basket and once I accidentally bumped into Danny and he shoved me away.

After a while I pretended to hurt my ankle and said I was going to my room to rest. Dad looked at me kind of funny and Danny didn't look at me at all.

I was one miserable boy as I closed my door and fell down on my bed. I wanted to bawl like a baby, but I was afraid mom would hear me and come in to see what was wrong. I thought about calling Bastion, but until I found out something for sure,  there was really nothing to say. I finally fell asleep and when I woke up I was disoriented. It was getting dark outside and very quiet in the house. 

I was filled with dread as I sat up and rubbed sleep from my eyes. For all I knew Danny had spilled his guts to both mom and day while I was snoring away in my room and I was about to get slaughtered. I felt a headache coming on and my stomach felt raw and empty. 

I peeked out and saw the coast was clear and quickly walked to the bathroom and peed and washed my face. I looked at myself in the mirror, my complexion was pale and my eyes looked wild and tired. I stuck out my tongue and it was coated. Was I getting sick on top of everything else? I finally decided I couldn't put it off any longer and went in to face my family.

I found them in the kitchen. Mom was cooking something that smelled wonderful and dad and Danny were playing a game of chess. Suddenly it seemed like dad and Danny were getting closer. I wondered what that was all about. Was Danny never going to talk to me again or have anything to do with me? Was I being phased out and dad phased in? Was dad Danny's new hero and me yesterday's news?

"Hi sweetie, did you have a good nap?" mom said coming over to give me a hug. I almost started crying. It felt so good to have my mom hug me but I wondered if she'd ever hug me again if she knew what Danny knew. I hugged her back and when I broke the hug I saw Danny had been watching us. When our eyes met he turned his head back to the chess board and even when I sat down across from him he didn't look at me.

Mom and dad didn't seem to notice the tension between us, but it was just a matter of time before they started to ask questions. I had to talk to him, but how was I going to get him away from dad long enough to do that? Dad seemed to be totally into the chess game, squinting his eyes and looking thoughtful, but next move Danny said checkmate very softly and dad groaned as he admitted defeat.

"You know what makes this so painful is that I taught you how to play to begin with," dad chuckled, "but I guess you know what I know plus what you've figured out by yourself."

"Wanna play again dad?" Danny said still avoiding looking at me.

"It's almost supper time so we better clear out, besides I'm not sure my ego could stand another beating like that."

Danny didn't protest and he began helping dad put the pieces in the box. Danny grabbed the box and board up and went off to his room and I was tempted to follow him, but supper was almost ready and I wanted to have time to really talk this thing out. I helped mom set the table and pretty soon we were ready to eat. It was bean night and beans and I don't get along too well...lol, so I ate fried potatoes and cornbread with lots of butter. Danny picked at his food and kept looking at dad and talking about the game of hoops they'd played and the chess game as if I weren't even in the room. 

I think it was about then that mom and dad began to realize there was a pink elephant in the room and that it needed to be addressed.

"Did you boys have a good time this weekend with Bastion?" mom asked.

"Yeah, it was great," I said enthusiastically then realizing what Danny knew I toned it down, "and we made some new friends at that park and played some baseball and hoops."

"Danny, did you thank your brother for letting you hang out with him and his friend?" dad said causing me to cringe.

"Yeah, he did," I said jumping in, "but it was no big deal, he's my bro and I like spending time with him too," I said looking at Danny and smiling weakly.

He looked up and gave me a sad smile and I could see the pain in is eyes and it became my pain. I wanted to puke thinking about what this might mean to our relationship, but I didn't know what to do if he wouldn't talk to me.

"Well, I think you both look wore out. Maybe you should turn in early tonight?" mom suggested.

"Yes ma 'am," Danny said looking down at his plate, "I'm not very hungry, can I be excused? I wanna take a bath before bed."

"Okay, you're not getting sick on us are you?" mom asked with concern, "come here and let me feel your forehead."

Danny went over to her and let her do her mom thing then leaned into her and hugged her neck, "I love you mom."

"I love you too Tigger," she said hugging him tight and kissing his cheek. Tigger was her private pet name for him because he had hung on to his stuffed Tigger doll until it was so worn out it had to be retired. I think he was nine then...lol.

"You don't feel hot. I guess you just played too hard or stayed up too late. Go take a hot bath and I'll come in and tuck you in later."

Danny bounced off just like Tigger to take his bath and I just sat there picking at my food and waiting for my folks to start grilling me.

"Did something happen between you and your brother?" Dad asked suddenly.

"I....no....why do you think that?" I asked trying to sound sincere.

"Well, he seems to be giving you the cold shoulder and the temperature in here is frigid," he teased, "But whatever it is we trust you two work it out, but if you need our help don't be afraid to ask, okay?"

I nodded and pushed some potatoes around my plate then asked if I could be excused. Usually Danny and I would have cleared but we got a reprieve again that night and I was thankful. I scraped my plate and set it in the sink and went to my room to grab my clothes and sat down to wait for my turn in the bathroom. 

I fell across the bed and closed my eyes and suddenly my phone chimed notifying me I had a new text message. I found the phone and opened it, it was from Bastion. 

I've been worried. Is everything ok?

Wish I knew. Haven't had a chance to find out yet. Maybe later.

Oh, sorry. I just feel so bad. It's all my fault.

No, it's not your fault. Don't worry. He hasn't told my parents so that's a good thing. I think he is just confused and maybe a little mad at me.

He will get over it. I just know he will.

I hope so. Well, I"m gonna go take a bath. If I can I'll text you later, ok?

Yes, please. Goodnight Cody. I love you.

I love you too. Goodnight and don't worry.

I heard Danny come out of the bathroom and I jumped up and grabbed my clothes but he was already in his room and for once he had the door closed. He hardly ever closed his door and I took it personally. I wanted to go down there and pound on the door and make him listen to me, but I just sighed and went in to take a nice hot bubble bath.

I thought about the last time I had taken a bath and how Danny had wandered in to pee and we seemed to be so close and I missed that. I wanted to cry, but I knew that wouldn't solve anything. I had to pull myself together and deal with this like a man...well, a gay boy anyway, and if he couldn't understand then that was his problem. I actually got a little mad as I laid there soaking in that tub of bubbles. 

Who was he to judge me and Bastion for our love? Then I slapped myself with a soapy hand, No , you idiot its not his fault you're a fag and that you couldn't keep it in your pants when there was danger of getting caught.

I stayed in the tub till the water got cool and then got out and dried off and brushed my teeth and got dressed. I usually wore only underwear to bed, but since I was planning on talking to Danny first I dressed in shorts and a tee.

I took a deep breath and stepped out into the hall and then stopped dead in my tracks. I leaned against the wall, suddenly feeling very weak and light headed. I waited a minute for my head to clear then slowly made my way down the hall to Danny's room. I stopped outside his door with my hand raised ready to knock but I couldn't bring myself to do it at first. Then taking another deep breath I brought my hand down so lightly it wouldn't have killed a fly if there had been one hanging around there. 

When he didn't respond I managed to knock a little harder but not too loud....sort of a medium knock I guess, and he called out "Come in."

I opened the door slowly and pushed it open and at first I didn't see him. I looked to the left and he was there by his bookcase messing with his model cars. He turned suddenly and seeing me his eyes dropped to the floor and he said in an icy voice, "Oh, I thought it was mom. What's up?"

"What's up?" I threw back at him softly," I think you know what's up."

He shrugged, "I'm really tired Cody and I just wanna go to sleep."

"We can't sleep till we talk about this bro. I'm sorry about what happened, it was stupid, but you have to talk to and tell me what you're feeling. I don't wanna loose you now that I've just got you back," I said as tears filled my eyes.

"I'm not like that Cody," he said suspiciously, "besides we're brothers...that's just wrong."

"What? No...I would never....I love you...like a brother, that's all. I don't know what you're thinking but I promise you I would never try that stuff with you."

"But you would with him?" he said making the word him sound like a curse word.

"I'm sorry. I can't help how I am Danny. Trust me if I could change I would. Bastion is the only one who understands me...we're alike the two of us and we got very close very fast and we just got carried away."

"Yeah, I saw how close," he smirked, "that's sick Cody."

I wanted to die when he said that, because I had thought that myself when I was still fighting my feelings.

"I know it seems that way, but when two people love each other...."

"Ha, you love him...you're in love? What are you....boyfriends now?" Danny said nastily.

Something about his attitude was making me bolder. It was easier to be angry when someone was being unreasonable and that's how I saw Danny just then.

"I guess we are. Is that so bad? We care for each other and we're not hurting anyone with what we do together. We just weren't thinking. We knew we were going to be apart soon and we just wanted to...."

"To get off one more time?" Danny said frowning.

"To make each other happy one more time."

He plopped down on his bed and stared at the ceiling for a minute then rolled onto his side and stared at me, "I don't know Cody, I just don't know. I don't know how I feel about all this right now. I still love you, you're my brother, but I'm no sure how I feel about Bastion now."

"He really likes you Cody and it would hurt me if you two couldn't be friends, but if that's how it has to be..."

"So, you would choose him over me?"

"What? No, of course not, but you can't ask me to stop liking him just because you don't understand how we feel about each other."

He rolled over onto his back and closed his eyes and threw his arm across them and sighed, "I'm pretty tired Cody. Can we talk about this tomorrow?"

"I guess, but I just wanted you to know that I'm still the same boy that I was before you...well, saw what you saw. I'm still your brother and I love you with all my heart. I'd die for you Danny, you know that right? But I can't help being the way I am any more than you can help being the way you are."

"I'll think about what you said," he said softly, "we can talk some more tomorrow when I'm no so tired, okay?"

"Okay, goodnight bro. Can...can I have a hug?" I asked almost choking up. 

If he had refused I don't know what I would have done, but he hopped up quickly and threw himself in my arms and started crying. I hugged him close and kissed the top of his head and then he pulled away and climbed into bed and pulled the covers up over him.

"I love you baby brother," I said softly as I leaned down and kissed his cheek.

"I love you too....and I'm sorry I was mean to you and ignored you."

"It's okay, I understand. Sleep tight and I'll see you tomorrow."

He nodded and sniffed back a few tears then I left him and went to my room. Mom passed me on the way and I heard her go into his room and close the door. I didn't worry so much now that Danny would tell mom or dad my secret, I knew that he was struggling with accepting that I was gay and that Bastion and I were having sex, but I was almost 100% sure he'd get over it if we were patient.

I went to my room and stripped down to my briefs and realized I hadn't put any sheets on my bed after I'd tossed the dirty ones in the washer. I found a set in the linen closet and quickly put them on and climbed into bed. I smiled when I thought about how nice it had been to have Bastion sleeping right beside me and I was sorry I'd changed the sheets. If I hadn't I could have smelled his sweet scent on them as I fell asleep.

I texted him one last time before I fell asleep and told him what had happened and he seemed as encouraged as I did. I fell asleep thinking about how much I loved my brother and how much I loved Bastion and how different the two kinds of love were.

When I went in to breakfast the next morning Danny was already gone. His bus didn't come until after mine so it was obvious he was avoiding me and that hurt a little. I managed to scarf down a Pop Tart and some milk but I still felt pretty lousy. I hadn't slept all that well and I had hoped Danny would be his old sunny self today. I considered walking down to his bus stop and talking to him, but I might miss my own bus if I did and I decided maybe giving him a little space might be the best thing right now.

I got to my stop just as the bus pulled up and climbed onboard and found a seat in the back. At the next stop Trey got on and as usual he sat with me. 

"Hey, who shit in your corn flakes?" he said when he saw the look on my face.

"Sorry, I just have something going on. I really can't talk about it," I said giving him a weak smile.

"Is it...you and Bastion?" he asked surprising me.

"What? No, not really. It's my little brother...we had a fight that's all," I lied.

"Oh, brother's are a pain aren't they?"

"Well, usually he's pretty cool. Anyway it was my fault. I just feel bad about what happened that's all."

"You nail him in the snozz again?" Trey giggled.

"No, nothing like that. I really don't want to talk about it okay?"

"Sure no problem. Hey did you get your math homework done?"

I couldn't wait to get to homeroom and see Bastion and he was waiting for me just outside the door.

"Well, any progress?"

"Nope, he skipped out this morning before I even got up," I said sighing, "I'm worried Bastion. Not about him telling on us, but I'm afraid he hates me now," I said sadly.

"I don't think he could ever hate you Cody, but he might hate me,"

"Why do you think that?"

"Well, he might make me out to be the bad guy...a bad influence on you and after all...well, I was the one doing the...ummm...you know."

"Still, he has to know I wanted it to happen. He's not that naive. Do you know what he said to me last night?
He said he wasn't that way...as if I was asking him to do things with me. I have to admit that hurt a little. I would never even think about anything like that. I guess I'll just have to let him get over this on his own. I've tried talking to him, but he says he needs time."

"Do you think it would help if I talked to him?"

"No!" I said a bit too loud, then lowered my voice, "I mean he might not take that too well...not right now anyway. I...I don't think you should come over for a while either," I said looking into his eyes. The hurt look in his eyes broke my heart and even though we were standing in the hall and hundreds of kids were all around us I took his hand in mine and said, "I love you and I want to be with you, but I don't want to rub this in his face. I can still come to your house ...if you want me to."

He nodded, "I understand. Well, we should get inside," he said pulling his hand away, "we don't want to get into any more trouble," he added almost sarcastically.

I frowned but followed him inside and took my seat. He busied himself with his books and papers and ignored me for the next few minutes and I felt like shit...once again. Why couldn't I learn to keep my mouth shut?

At lunch I waited for him at the doors but he was nowhere to be seen and finally I gave up and went to the cafeteria alone. He wasn't there either and even though I didn't feel much like eating I grabbed a tray and put some food on it and found a table away from everyone. There were a few of the misfits sitting at the end and they kept looking at me but they didn't bother me and I was fine with that.

I picked at my food and thought about how my world had changed in the one day. I was happy and in love yesterday and today the two people I cared most about were mad at me. If I hadn't been in a room full of kids who would have thought I was crazy or a wimp, I would have started bawling like a baby.  I was just about to give up and go back to my locker when Bastion walked in and looked around. When he saw he he headed my way and I could see by the look in his eyes that he felt as bad as I did.

"May I join you Cody?"

"Sit," I said softly, "I'm sorry about what I said earlier....I was just so upset."

"No, it's fine. I'm the one who should be sorry. You are completely right, I should stay away until Danny comes to grip with his feelings about all this. I just let my feelings get in the way. I love you so much and I just want to be with you as much as possible, but we can still be together at my home. My parents like you and have told me you are welcome any time."

"Are you sure you're okay? I feel really bad, but I just want Danny to have a chance to get over this. When he does he'll come around and be your friend again, I just know it."

"Oh, has he said that he didn't want to be my friend?"

"No, he didn't say that...I didn't mean that he wasn't....I just well, you know what I mean. Right now he's hurting and he needs someone to blame and it might be you."

Bastion nodded and had that hurt look in his eyes again. Why was I messing this up so bad?

Finally I sighed, "You know what? screw it. Who is he to get mad at me for having some fun with the one person I love more than anything else in this world. He just needs to get over it and move on."

"Cody, don't. It's all right. I understand. He's your brother, your flesh and blood, and you love him too and you want to make sure he's all right and I love you even more for that. We'll be fine and he will get over it eventually. I'm just sorry I acted like such an ass and left you to dine alone. Can you forgive me?" he said smiling and my heart melted.

"I could never be upset with you. I love you too much. Maybe we were both wrong so let's just forget it and move on, okay?"

He nodded and smiled again. Are you going to eat all those chicken nuggets?" He said grinning

"Not all of them, but I might eat a few now that my stomach isn't tied up in knots. I'll share..half for you and half for me," I said dividing them up. 

We  ate in silence but that was fine, we had said what we needed to and everything was cool with us again. All I had to worry about was Danny and that was plenty.

As soon as I got home that day I looked for Danny. I found him in the family room plopped down on the couch watching  TV.

"Hey, what ya watchin?" 

"Ellen, she's giving cars away again."

"Cool, wish she'd give me one." I said falling down beside him, I was hungry but my after school snack could wait.

"Why? You can't drive," he said without looking at me.

"I'd save it till I was 16. Oh, maybe I'd let mom drive it...or dad...as long as they were careful and kept it full of gas and checked the oil and stuff," I chuckled.

He giggled and that was music to my ears, "Would you let me drive it when I got old enough?"

"Well, sure...in fact I'd teach you to drive and then you could take your driver's test in it," I said smiling and he smiled back.

"Cody...."

"Uh huh."

"I'm not mad at you or Bastion...okay?"

"I'm glad. I don't know what I'd have done if you stopped...you know being my brother again."

"I'd never do that, I promise. I...I just need to think about things, that's all."

I nodded, "That's cool. I told Bastion that I didn't think it was a good idea for him to come over for a while and he understood."

Danny frowned, "You didn't have to tell him that. He's your...ummm, friend and I don't want to keep you two from being together."

"Just for a while. I think it would be sort of weird if he came over, don't you think?"

He shrugged, but I could see that he was thinking the same thing, "Well, maybe just for a little while. Thanks for understanding."

I scooted over and hugged him and he hugged back and that was a good sign. I don't know what I would have done if he pulled away or stiffened up. 

"I'm starved," I said finally letting him go, "have you had your snack yet?"

"Naw, I was waiting for you," he said smiling, "there's ice cream," he added looking like a little kid.

I smiled at him and jumped up and offered him my hand and when he took it I pulled him up off the couch and we walked to the kitchen. I fixed us sundaes with two kinds of ice cream, sliced bananas, and chocolate sauce and a dab of Cool Whip and we sat down at the table and ate them while we talked.

"So, did you see your new friend Tommy today?"

"Yeah, we eat lunch together now and I see him at recess all the time. We played dodge ball today and we both got out really fast so we talked while we waited for a new game to start. He's pretty cool. I might invite him over next weekend if you don't care."

"Why would I care? I think that's awesome and I can stay out of the way or if you want we can hang out together."

"Well, I want you to hang out with us some of the time, but not all the time, okay?"

I nodded, "You just tell me when you want me to go and I'm gone," I chuckled.

"Thanks." He said then clammed up for a while. I could tell he was thinking and I didn't want to derail his train of thought...lol.

Finally he said, "Cody, don't get mad....but I gotta ask this," he said giving me a panicky look.

"Sure ask me anything," I said as my heart beat so fast I felt like I would faint, " I promise I won't get mad....no matter what."

"Well...I guess maybe I already know this but...are you...ummmm....you know.....gay?"

I relaxed a little, I was pretty sure he had already figured that out but he just wanted me to confirm it.

"Yeah, I am....is that okay little brother? Can you still love me if I'm that way?" I choked out.

"You'd love me if I was different wouldn't you? Well, I'd love you no matter what. Even if you did something awful...like killing someone or something really horrible...I'd still love you and I'd come visit you in prison."

I laughed, "I didn't kill anyone little bro, I just like boys...that's all."

He laughed, "Oh, yeah....I know, but I was just saying how I feel. I love you just like you are, not matter what."

I nodded, I felt like crying but I wasn't sad, I was happy, very happy, "I love you more than anyone in the whole world and I feel the same."

"Even more than...umm, Bastion?"

I sighed, "Well, it's a different kind of love that I feel for Bastion. It's a very powerful kind of love, a physical love. Do you understand what I'm talking about?"

"Sex?" he asked looking interested in what I was saying, "Like how mom and dad love each other and still do it?"

I chuckled, "I guess it must be a lot like that. I just know that when I'm with Bastion I just want to be touching him all the time even if it's just holding hands."

"Or...sucking wieners," he giggled, "What's that like Cody?" He asked then blushed.

"I really don't think we should talk about that," I said turning as red as he was.

"Then how am I supposed to understand?" he whined.

"Well....sex is very private stuff....between two people...you know?"

"But, it wasn't very private yesterday," he said smugly.

"We thought we were being careful, we just slipped up. We would never do that kind of stuff if we thought we'd get caught. If mom or dad had caught us...well, you know..I might be in a boys home by now."

He frowned, "Is that what you're worried about? Do you think I'm gonna start ratting you out now..... after I kept quiet all those years? Not once did I ever tell mom and dad the rotten things you did to me...not once," he said becoming agitated.

"I...I never knew, but I trust you now. I know you won't tell mom or dad, but I don't want to mess you up by telling you this stuff,"  I said pleadingly.

"But, I'm already messed up because I saw it and I don't understand it. Just tell me what it's like and then maybe I'll understand."

"I....I don't know. I mean I do know but it's hard to explain. You know how good it feels when you...uh, you know, beat off? Well, imagine something ten times.....no, a hundred times that good."

"Really?" He said wide-eyed.

"It's not just the feeling in your..uh, dick...it's because of the other person...it's like you're sharing something so wonderful and when you're doing it back to them, it's like you feel so powerful to be making them feel so good and that's wonderful too."

"So....you do it back to him?" he asked sheepishly.

I  nodded, "Yeah, and it's great," I said shrugging. I felt naked as I laid my love life out to my little brother.

He seemed to be thinking about that a moment then said, "I guess that's only fair. I mean he needs to get him rocks off too." 

I almost laughed at his choice of words, but I could see he was trying to be serious and grown up about everything.

I nodded, "Yeah, and with two guys I guess it's easier  to know what to do and what feels good. I mean girls are sort of complicated and a mystery to me."

"Well, I don't know much about them, but I hope to some day,"  he said grinning.

"As cute as you are, the girls will come to you baby brother," I said grinning.

"Or the boys," he said giggling, "Tommy already asked me if I liked him that way."

"What, really?" I asked in amazement. I didn't know what to think about that though.

"Gotcha," he giggled, "I was only kidding."

"Grrrr...I outa tickle you for that," I said wiggling my fingers at him.

"No...please...not that," he protested weakly.

"Well, maybe after we eat our ice cream," I chuckled, "or...we could go throw the ball around."

"Yeah, that sounds cool. Eat fast," he giggled then began sucking his ice cream down so fast his face was a chocolaty mess.

Mom got home around five and stuck her head out the patio door and yelled hello at us and we ran up to give her a hug. 

"Dad is going to be late tonight, so I was thinking...if you boys want to....we could go out and get a burger or something for dinner."

"Yeah!" we both cheered.

"Well, I want to take a hot bath first, but go ahead and get ready and we'll leave around six. Be thinking about what you want, I'm fine with whatever. Oh, and make sure you boys put on a clean shirt."

We both gave each other the look that kids have been giving each other for the last million years when their moms act like...well moms,  and went in to change shirts. I found a nice blue one in the back of the closet that I'd forgotten about and while I was waiting to go I called Bastion to give him the good news about Danny.

"He's so much better today, he was giggling and acting like the old Danny."

"Oh, Cody I am so relieved. I guess his love for you overpowers any disappointment he might have about....about your being gay."

"Yeah, I guess. I'm just so relieved. It was so good to just hang out with him and not have all that shit between us. But he did throw me for a loop when he started asking for me to explain about gay sex," I said chuckling.

"What? No...he didn't?" Bastion gasped, "What did you tell him?"

"I didn't go into detail, but I think he understands how I feel about you and that sex is only a part of it."

"That's so sweet Cody, I mean that you told him that. He is so lucky to have a big brother like you."

"Well, he didn't think so yesterday, but fortunately kids get over stuff pretty fast. By tomorrow he may be completely over it."

"Do you really think so?" Bastion asked sounding excited.

"We'll see, well I gotta go... mom is taking us out to dinner cause dad is working late."

"Goodnight dear Cody, I love you and I am so happy that you and Danny are working things out."

"Night, I love you too," I said feeling really happy, "See you tomorrow at school."

"Yes, and I'll bring lunch again. Something special, I've already talked to Maria," he said beaming.

"Yummm, I can hardly wait. See ya, night again."

I finally hung up because  I knew if one of us didn't we'd be talking all night and I might starve. 

I found Danny sitting in his room leafing through a magazine and when I tapped on his door frame he looked up and smiled, "Mom ready to go?"

"No, you know how she is, she'll take an hour to get ready, "Whatcha reading?"

"Mad Magazine, it's pretty funny," he said but he didn't seem to be that amused.

"Oh, yeah...I used to read those all the time...spy vs spy was my favorite."

"Yeah...... Hey, Cody," he said laying the book down and looking at me with serious eyes, "If you want to have Bastion over again, it's cool. I don't want to mess up what you guys have."

"That's really cool of you, but I think he might feel a little uncomfortable right now. Maybe for awhile I should go to his house instead."

He nodded, "Okay, but tell him he's welcome and I'm not mad at him. I still think he's cool and I like him a lot."

"Hey, don't try to steal my boyfriend," I teased and he smiled shyly.

"Okay, but I am cuter," he teased back.

"Ouch, maybe I better keep him away forever then."

"Just kidding Cody, I don't like him that way, but he's a nice boy and after all, he was the reason we're brother's again."

"Maybe, but I think we all need some time to sort things out...don't you?"

He shrugged, "It's your call."

We heard Mom come out of the bathroom and she peaked in on her way to her room. She was wearing dad's terrycloth robe and had a towel wrapped around her head like a turban.

"Five minutes, I promise," she said then disappeared down the hall, but we rolled our eyes cause we both knew it would be more like twenty.

She surprised us though and only took ten  minutes. She was dressed in jeans and blouse and for a mom she looked pretty nice. I mean our mom isn't a runway model or anything, but she is pretty anyway. All our friends always told us how pretty she was and one kid even told me she was hot, but I punched him in the arm and he shut up...lol. After all she's my mom.

If I really thought about, and I actually had once or twice before I grossed myself out, my dad is pretty hot too. He keeps in shape and he's a handsome guy. He has that five o'clock shadow that almost looks blue and a square jaw and sort of looks like superman in the comic books. He's strong and smart and...well, it's getting weird...so I'll shut up...lol.

Mom drove us to the Burger Barn which is our favorite burger place and we found a booth about midway along the wall and sat down. Its' really neat cause you order from your table with an intercom like the one's they have at some drive ins like Sonic. I ordered the bacon cheeseburger with barbecue sauce and extra onions and fries and a chocolate milk shake. Danny ordered chicken nuggets and tater tots and a Coke and mom ordered a taco salad and ice tea. 

"Man this is nice," I said as I pulled out one of the word puzzles they provide to keep kids busy and started working it.

"Well, if I can't be with dad at least I'm with my other two favorite guys," mom said sounding happy. Sometimes I wondered how she got everything done what with working and then taking care of the three of us. I know we didn't give her near enough credit and I made a mental note to tell her just how much I appreciated all she did for us from on.

Danny pulled out one of those maze puzzles and started tracing a path to the cow in the "Burger Barn" and didn't say anything for a while, then suddenly he said, "Mom, I was wondering if my friend Tommy could come over Friday night. He could ride the bus home with me and we could take him home Saturday...please."

"Well, of course I'd need to talk to his mother or father, but I don't see any problem. What do you think Cody?"

"Huh, oh...its' cool. I already told Danny I can hang with them if they want or get lost. I might go over to Bastion's for a while Saturday if it's okay."

Danny gave me a little smile and nodded, telling me that he was cool with me and Bastion and thanking me for backing him up with Tommy.

"That's fine. I'm glad he lives so close and the weather is supposed to be warm and sunny."

Our order arrived then and we were busy chowing down for  a while then Danny looked up with a bit of ketchup on his face and said, "Tommy says that his brother wants to be Cody's friend too, but he doesn't know how to tell him."

My mouth dropped open and I swiped a fry in some ketchup and stuck it in my mouth so I wouldn't have to answer right away.

Mom kept looking at me expecting me to answer so I finally said, "Well, we don't exactly run with the same crowd. I only met him that one time after I stood up to the guys who wrote on Bastion's locker, but tell Tommy to tell Luke to just talk to me....that's how friends start out."

Mom smiled, I had said just the right thing, "Just because this boy wants to be friends doesn't mean you have to be close friends....like you and Bastion (I was squirming when she said that) but there are all kinds of friends. Some friendships last forever," she said looking wistful, "and some just fade away. What I mean is friends come and go especially when you're a child but our true friends hang on till the end."

"Like dad," Danny said grinning. We had heard the story of how they started out as friends in grade school enough times to know what she was thinking.

"Yes," she said looking dreamy eyed, "he's my best friend in the world."

I nodded, I hoped Bastion and I would still be together when we were mom and dad's age, but I knew there were no guarantees in life and what Bastion and I felt right now might change next week. That made me a little sad, but then I remembered how much I cared about Bastion and I decided that wasn't going to change any time soon.

We finished our dinner and mom let us blow a few quarters in the claw machine and I actually won a stuffed bear. It wasn't very big, but it was cute and I thought about giving it to Bastion, but in the end I knew exactly what I should do with it.

"Mom, I want you to have this. So when I'm all grown up and gone you will remember me," I said a little teary eyed, "I won it just for you."

She had tears in her eyes as she bent down and hugged me tightly, then kissing my cheek she took the little bear and kissed it too. 

"I am going to name him Cody Bear and I will treasure him forever. Thank you so much sweetie. I must be the luckiest mom in the world to have two such wonderful boys," she said pulling Danny into the hug too. We hugged for a minute then the moment was gone and we piled in the van and went home.

For some reason I was dead tired and went straight to my room and texted Bastion to tell him what a nice evening I'd had and wish him goodnight again. 

Oh, Cody that was so sweet. You are so lucky to have a mother and father who love you so much and who spend time with you and Danny.

I am, but your folks seem nice too. 

They are wonderful people, but very busy and don't have much time to spend with me. 

Well, like you said it will get better once their practice takes off.

Yes, I think so. Goodnight love. I will see you tomorrow.

Goodnight, I love you and can't wait to see you again.

I could feel the pain in  Bastion's words and I wondered if part of the reason he loved me so much was because he couldn't love his parents as much as he wanted. I sighed and laid back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I didn't  feel so tired any more and my head was swimming with all kinds of thoughts. Being twelve and in love was very confusing and tiring. Sure it was exciting and all, but trying to keep it a secret was a fell time job. Now that I thought about it I was glad that Danny knew, that was one less thing I needed to worry about and assuming he'd get over it and be comfortable around Bastion again, we wouldn't have to be quite so careful around him any more.

A knock on the door pulled me back to reality, "Come in."

It was Danny and he was already dressed for bed in shorts but tonight he didn't have a tee on. I couldn't help but stare at his chest and flat stomach. My little bro was becoming a little stud and that made me feel a little weird to think about. At least my dick didn't get hard...lol.

"Whatta you doin?"

"Beatin off," I teased.

He giggled, "I didn't know you could do that without using your hands."

"I'm very talented," I joked, "What's up?"

"Not much, my tummy hurts a little. I took some Malox but I can't lay down yet or it hurts worse."

"Awww...come here and sit down. I'll rub your back and help you relax," I said surprising myself. Where had that come from?

He bounced over to the bed and sat down next to me with his feet dangling off the edge and turned to look at me with his big blue, heart breaking eyes and said, "I'm sorry I was mean to you when I...you know..."

"It's cool. It was a shock. I'd probably have felt the same way if it had been you," I chuckled.

"Me and Tommy?" he asked seriously.

"Or anyone," I said reaching up to rub his smooth soft skin. His back was unblemished and I could see every one of his vertebrae as they rippled down a perfectly straight spine.

"I'm not sure I would do that, but I might...you now fap with him."

I assumed he meant Tommy and I wondered if Tommy really had come on to him despite his saying he was just kidding about that.

"Well, I can tell you for certain...that's not a gay thing at all. Boys have been doing that since cave men roamed the earth. We like to compare and there's something sexy about watching another boy do that."

He nodded and threw his head back, "Ohhh...that feels good. Maybe I could lay on my tummy and you could give me a back massage." 

I was shocked but excited by the thought and before I could think why I shouldn't do it I was straddle of my little brother working my hands into his warm soft flesh. His neck felt tight and he moaned as I kneaded the muscles there and after a little while I could feel the tension melt away. As I ran my hands down the popple of his spine he moaned again and I laughed.

"Feel good?"

"Ummmm...I could go to sleep. It's sooo relaxing."

I knew how good it felt because Bastion and I had given each other a back massage before. The only difference was our massages led to sex. I panicked at that thought and realized my dick was hard and if I wasn't careful Danny would notice that before too long.

I scooted back so my dick was nowhere near his legs and concentrated on his lower back for a while causing more moaning. Only problem was it brought my hands and within inches of his cute perky butt. My eyes were glued to it the whole time and my dick was so hard it ached. I could feel the wetness in my undies as my dick leaked tons of pre-cum while I perved on my brother's butt.

Finally I came to my senses and jumped up causing him to say,"Hey, I'm not relaxed yet."

"I'm really tired," I lied as I struggled to hide my boner. 

He flipped over and took one look at me and nodded his head, "Me too," He said sitting up, but I don't think he was talking about being tired.

As he stood I saw he had a boner too and I didn't know how I felt about that. I mean I guess it could have been innocent, I mean I had been touching him pretty intimately, but on the other hand maybe it was more and that freaked me out. I was already freaked out enough by my own boner and I knew what had caused it.

"Well goodnight," I said quickly hopping into bed and covering up. 

I could see the indecision in his eyes, we always hugged goodnight but if we did I would know for sure he had a boner. Finally I guess his need to be affectionate won out over his embarrassment and he came over and gave me a quick hug bringing his bulge withing inches of my face. I couldn't help but notice that it was a good sized bulge and I was proud of my baby brother. He was going to be a little stud, just like me...lol.

He rushed out then and I turned off the bedside lamp, pushed back the covers, pulled out my boner, and began beating it like I was mad at it. I barely had time to grab a sock before I was shooting the biggest load of my life and when I was done I fell down and went right to sleep without having time to feel guilty.

.