Date: Sat, 21 Dec 2002 11:43:04 -0500 From: Jeff Wilson Subject: W.A.R. Part Two, Chapter 8 Home stretch time! There's just two more chapters after this one to go in Part Two. Then we start Part Three! Now, I have lots of ideas for Part Three right now. But I have nothing written yet. Just a general plan for where I want it to go. So, I know this sounds like a long time, but we're looking at a February start for Part Three. But if you know me by now, you know that I want to make the story good, and that means taking some time to get it just the way I want it before I start sending in chapters. Warning: Hey, if you read this story and end up in jail or something, it's not my fault!! If you are living in some country that makes this stuff illegal and you read it in front of a cop, then you made your own bed! The least you could do is be sneaky about it!! W.A.R. Part Two: Cold Winter Chapter 8: Snow Battle by Jeff Wilson "Hey! What are you doing with him?" I jumped when I heard Dustin's voice calling. We were heading back to my house when we saw him coming up behind us. "Oh! Hi Dustin!" "Don't "Hi Dustin" me! What are you doing? Don't tell me you forgave him already! Are you that stupid? What kind of sucker are you?" He said angrily. "You don't know what we went through last night Dust!" I said, hoping to avoid a fight. "Last night? What, did he sleep at your house too?" I made a quick glance in Brett's direction, but Dustin caught it. "You DID!!! You did have him sleep over!! What the fuck?!? I'm your friend and I get nothing! He punches you in the face and gets a sleepover! Why don't you just blow each other and get it over with!!!" "What the fuck do you mean by that?" Now he'd done it. I was angry. "What do you mean, "blow each other?" What, I can't have friends over unless they get your stamp of approval?" "Fuck you, Billy! No wait, Brett probably already did!!" At that point I ran full force at Dustin and jumped at him. Dustin simply moved to the right and pushed me. I slipped in the snow and my feet went out from under me. I ended up on my back and my head made a weird thump. I don't know what I hit, but it knocked me silly. I could tell what was going on, but I couldn't remember it. When I regained my senses, I looked around. Dustin was sitting on a tree stump with a bloody nose. Brett was gone. "What happened?" I asked groggily. I felt the bump on the back of my head. "Your bastard friend punched me in the nose!" Dustin said. He sounded strange. He was more angry than hurt. With his baseball cap on you couldn't see his thick red hair. Just the dark red around his ears. But his face was more red than his hair. "Where did he go?" "Who the fuck cares? Now he's punched both of us." "Well you started it!" I accused him. "Are you still gonna defend him instead of me?" He said, kind of surprised. "He's not the problem Dustin! It's people doing shit like you did to him! Why do people always have to rip on guys when they have really good friends? Why is it automatically "Oh, you're fags!" You know what? If that's what you think, Dustin, then I don't want to be your friend anymore. You can go to hell for all I care." I started to walk away. "Billy wait!" Dustin called. "Don't be mad at me. I'm sorry alright? I shouldn't have said that. I don't want you to hate me! I'm sorry. It's just... I'm sorry. I never see you any more and he always does! And I've never been mean to you! He fucking hit you and you had him sleep over. It's not fair!" He started to cry. I turned around and walked back to him. I knelt next to him by the stump. If seeing Brett cry was odd, it was worse with Dustin. I had never seen him cry in all the time I have known him. Even when we were little, if he'd get hurt his mom would tell him to get up and keep playing. So I was not sure how to treat him now. "Dustin, you will always be my friend! I'm sorry I told you to go to hell. I didn't mean it, okay? You know you're like a brother to me! You've been my friend since preschool. It's just, Brett's my friend too! You two have never gotten along, and I hate it. It's so hard to have to choose between you. The thing is, Brett doesn't make me choose, but you do. It's either I choose you or you get mad. The whole reason I started playing baseball is because of you. You don't have to be jealous though! I'll always love you, Dust." "Don't treat me like a two-year-old, Billy. Look at me, crying like a baby." He said, wiping his eyes and bloody nose. "Look, I don't like him. I may never like him. But I'll try to get along with him for your sake. And I'm NOT jealous. Oh yeah, one more thing... Don't be surprised if he's sort of got a black eye when you see him. I got him pretty good before he whacked me right on the nose. He's pretty strong for a shrimp... Then he did like last night and kind of looked at me funny, like he did to you. Then he ran away." "Oh shit!!! Look Dust, I've got to find him before he does something stupid! Are you going to be okay?" "I'll live. Sure, go and find him. I'll just sit here and bleed." He said sadly. One last tear finding its way down his cheek. I ran back to Brett's house. If I'd have been smart, I'd have just followed his footprints in the snow. But I was still a little groggy from my fall. I tried to open the back door, but it was actually locked. Brett's always forgetting to lock the door when he leaves. I ran around to the front, but it was locked too. That's when I saw Bret's mom's footprints in the snow. Then that light bulb went off in my head and I realized all I had to do was follow snow prints. I went back to the snow-covered trail and found tracks going all over the place. Dustin's went back toward his house. Mine went back toward Brett's house. Brett's went toward my house. I followed the footprints. At first they were spread very wide. I could tell he was running. When they got close to my house they slowed down. I looked around. No sign of him. So I kept following the footprints. They veered away from my house and I kept following them along. Then they came to a side walk. Crap! There were tons of prints going different directions. Doesn't anybody stay home on a snowy day anymore? Then I had a hunch. I started walking. Past my house. Past the church. Past the bank. All the way down to the river. I walked to the park by the river. There, on the bench looking out over the water, I saw him. I walked to the bench and sat beside him. His left eye was swelling and his face was red. I just sat there next to him. Neither of us said anything. We just looked out at the water. It was cold and the snow was beginning to get heavier. There was no one around, the park was empty except for us. I could see our breath every time we exhaled. He was sniffling like crazy. "Did you see Dustin?" He finally asked. "Yeah... He had a bloody nose." "I know." He continued looking out at the water. A barge was going by. "I punched him. After you fell, I ran up to him. We wrestled a little, but he's bigger than me. He punched me in the eye. So I hit him as hard as I could in the face." "You made him cry. No one's ever done that before..." "He hurt you. I wasn't thinking." "Well, he deserved it." "No.." His voice started to break and he began to cry. "He didn't deserve it. I had no right to hit him. Mom was right. I told you, I'm a no good bastard!" "You heard what he called us." "They're just words, Billy. I like Dustin. I wanted to be his friend. He's a nice guy. I know he's jealous of me. Jealous because I'm your friend. That wasn't my intention. I didn't want to steal you from him." "You didn't "steal" me! What kind of stupid thing to say is that?" "But in his mind, I did steal you. You were his best friend. You used to hang out with him all the time. I used to be jealous of him because you two were always doing stuff. But then you started to hang out with me more and more. We started to be closer than we had been before. But you left him out. How often did you hang out with him last summer? Hardly ever, huh..." "But that was my choice. You didn't make me." "Yeah, well I DIDN'T have a choice, okay? I didn't choose to move here when I was little. I didn't choose to be your friend. I didn't choose to fall in love with you! But it happened and I don't know what to do!" "You fell in love with me? But I thought you were just..." " Telling you that to make you feel better that day? Did you think I didn't mean it? Never. I always meant it, even when times were the worst. When I felt so terrible I wanted to die, I'd just remember that day we were here. That day of your grandma's funeral. I'd remember what you said to me. You may have thought I didn't mean it, but I did. I meant it more than anything in my life. I love you. I love you so much it hurts to be around you. I love you so much that when you're not with me, I'm miserable. I can't have you, but I can't be without you. Do you know how hard it was to wrestle with you this morning? Do you know how much it hurt to be so close to you? To feel you like that? Do you know what I wanted to do to you? What I wanted you to do to me?" "But I..." "Please don't say anything. I know this must be hard for you to hear. I understand if you don't want to be my friend anymore. It will kill me to be without you, but I understand. You have to live your life your way." "But you don't..." "Please Billy... I can't listen to it. Please just leave me alone. Now you know how I feel. Now you know my real secret. I hope you're happy now. Now you know what I really am. I'm a... I'm a... I like boys, okay? I don't like girls. I'm g... I'm... There's just nothing you can do about it. There's nothing I can do about it. Let's just leave it at that." "Would you shut up and listen to me!" He looked at me with a confused expression, tears running down his beautiful face. "Everything you said is exactly the same way I feel about you. Don't you get it? I love you just as much as you love me. I've always loved you! I always will love you! I didn't know you really meant it that day we were here. I thought you were just trying to make me feel better that day. Can't you see how much I love you? How I look at you? I go to bed and dream about you. In the morning, I can't wait to see you. At school, I look for ways to be with you. When I get home, I can't wait to see you again. When we're together, I'm the happiest boy in the world." "But I thought you mmmph..." I didn't let him finish. I reached over and turned his face my direction and then I kissed him. I kissed him right on the lips. He was surprised at first. But I had my hand on the back of his head and didn't let him get away. After a few seconds, I felt his hand in my hair. I closed my eyes and just enjoyed the powerful sensations I was experiencing. At long last I had connected with him in a way I had only dreamed about. If just touching him was enough before, this was even better! I wanted to feel this new sensation forever. When I thought we were done, he pulled me back against him and we continued the kiss. His lips felt so good against mine. So soft, just the right texture. So moist against my mouth. Even with my upper lip slightly swelled, I never felt anything feel so good, so perfectly right. Finally, reluctantly, we finished. We both sat there for a minute, realizing what had just happened. Processing it in our minds. We both kind of looked out at the Monongahela River going by, slowly making its way to Pittsburgh. "Wow..." He said, out of breath. "That was awesome. Do you know how long I've wanted to do that?" "Yeah, me too." I answered. I still couldn't believe it had really happened. "So, I guess Dustin was right about us." He said, looking at the water. "No. Just because we love each other doesn't mean we have to have sex or anything. I don't care about that right now. We have time to deal with that later." "Does this mean you're... you know...?" "Gay? I don't know. I'm pretty sure I am now. I've been fighting it and fighting it, but it's who I am. I've been trying to like girls the same way I like you. But I can't. Sometimes maybe you just find the right person for you and it doesn't matter whether they're a boy or girl. I don't feel different though. It's still me. I'm not any different than I was before. Just because I feel the way I do, it doesn't make me like want to dress in women's clothes or something. I'm happy with who I am. I'm a guy. And I love you, even though you're a guy too. We're not fags, it just means we're two people who found somebody to love. Who cares what equipment we've got in our pants?" "I don't know... I've always kind of liked your equipment." He said, starting to laugh. I laughed too. We sat for a while, snow falling more heavily on us. When we couldn't stand the cold and wet any longer, we reluctantly got up and started walking together to my house. There you go! Chapter Eight. I wonder what's going on in Dustin's head. What are his true feelings? Meanwhile, lookis like Billy and Brett have decided to take their relationship to the next level. But, that doesn't mean they're going to start fucking each other's brains out just yet. As Billy said, there's time for that later. Just because two people are gay it doesn't mean they have to have sex. Just like two straight people having sex just because. Sure some people do that, but how satisfying is that? The email address is the same: vicioussquirrel@hotmail.com I'm surprised by the amount of new readers who are emailing at this point. I'm glad you found the story, guys! I welcome all comments, good, bad, or "nit-picky." I'll even send you my thoughts on what you have to say, sometimes in excrutiating detail, as some people can tell you...