Date: Thu, 03 Jul 2003 17:46:16 -0400 From: Jeff Wilson Subject: W.A.R. Part 4 - Chapter 4 W.A.R. Part Four - Rehabilitation Chapter Four: The Phone Call by Jeff Wilson School had finally ended for the year and it couldn't have happened soon enough. I was enjoying my time at Brett's house, even though it seemed that his mom was always around. Even when we got done with school at 10:00 in the morning, she was at the house. It was nice that she was able to spend time with us and all, but we hadn't had a moment to ourselves that was more than a few minutes before she would appear to have us do something, eat, or go outside to "enjoy the summer weather." I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have been around all the time if I wasn't there. I figured that she thought I would do something to hurt myself. As if I could remember why I had hurt my hand the first time! What was I going to do anyway, break the other hand? Stupid Dustin and him saying that I had said that I wanted to kill myself. It was his fault that people thought I was nuts now. The worst thing about never being alone was that Brett and I could barely kiss each other without suddenly having his mom show up. We hadn't had a chance to do any real "fun" stuff in the whole week I'd been there. I was getting desperate. I felt like the minute we were alone that I was just going to rip his clothes off and we'd bang like bunnies. Maybe if we had had the chance to do some little stuff I wouldn't have felt so urgent. But now, I was beyond just wanting to be with him. I wanted him in the worst way. It felt like I was going to burst if I didn't get to be alone with him soon. "Billy, do you want some more ice cream?" Dr. Reilly asked while Brett and I were playing video games in his room. "No thanks." I said. She asked Brett, and his answer was the same. Then she left to work in her study. "God, is she ever going to leave us alone?" Brett grumbled, revealing that the stress of being under constant supervision was beginning to wear on him, too. I could tell that he was quite frustrated that his mom had ruined what was going to be our week to really have some fun together. "You mean it's not just me? I thought I was getting paranoid." I said. We laughed and bitched a little more about our plight when Dr. Reilly came back again. "Billy, you have a telephone call." She said. "Who is it?" I asked. "It's your mom." She said. I got up and went to her study. She let me use it so that I could talk privately. I thought that was nice of her. I didn't mind Brett hearing my conversations, but after a week of constant supervision, I was happy to get even a little bit of alone time. "Hello?" I said. "Billy! How are you?" Mom asked. "I'm fine. How about you?" "I miss you, but besides that, I'm feeling pretty good. Jen says you're doing well. I hope you're minding your manners while you're there." "Mom... What kind of person do you think I am? Of course I'm minding my manners and making sure that no one's around when I look through their medicine cabinets." "William Aaron!" She said, but then she started laughing. "Shame on you! I needed a good laugh. Thanks! Anyway, let me tell you what's going on. Your father's going to be moved down to Morgantown next week to a rehabilitation center. He'll be there for about a month or so. I'll probably come home and just drive down in the evenings since they'll keep him busy all day. Maybe I'll stay with your aunt and uncle down in Fairmont during the weekends." "That's great mom! So I'll get to go home soon?" "You mean you actually want to go home? I figured we'd have to knock you out and drag you away from there." "Well... I don't mind it too much. It's just not home. Plus I feel like Dr. Reilly doesn't trust me." "Really? Why?" "Well... She never leaves. Brett used to complain that she was never home. But she hasn't left us alone the whole time I've been here." "Billy, did you stop to think about how dangerous it would be to leave two fourteen year olds alone in a house by themselves all day?" "Mom, you left me alone with grandma last year all the time. If I could handle that, I think I could handle Brett." She had no idea how much I really did want to handle Brett! "That's different. You weren't... well..." "It's your idea! You're the reason she won't leave us alone! You think I'm going to hurt myself, don't you?" "Now, Billy, don't get angry about it. I just couldn't be sure that..." "Mom... I'm not going to get angry. I'm not going to yell. I am going to tell you that I'm pretty pissed off that you don't trust me. I don't know what happened to my hand. I may never know. But I was in a different place then. I'm not going to do anything stupid, okay? Now, can you please call off the 24-hour surveilance?" "We'll see." She said. I knew that was mom-speak for "no." "Anyway, there's somebody here who wants to talk to you." "Who?" I asked. "Well here, I'll let you talk to him." I heard silence, and then a familiar, though weakened voice. "Hey, boy." "Dad!!" I almost yelled into the phone. "I need to tell you something, boy." "Dad, you..." "Billy. Just listen. The last time we spoke to each other, I did the very worst thing I've ever done in my life. You know what I'm talking about." "Dad, please don't..." "You know what I'm talking about." "Yeah." I said. "Billy, I can't tell you how sorry I am about that. I was wrong. When I was young, I swore that I would never hit my kids in anger. My father had done it so often and I hated him for it. When I hit you, when I became my father... I hated myself. And then when I had the stroke... When I realized that I could die..." "You're not going to die, dad!" I said. "When I realized that I could die, Billy, and the last thing you would hear me say was that I didn't want to look at you..." His voice, which had gotten a little stronger, began to break. "Billy, the only reason I'm here today is because I needed to stay alive to tell you how sorry I am. To tell you how beautiful you are. To tell you how foolish your father can be! I had to stay alive because there's no way that my boy's going to hate me the way I hated my father." "I don't hate you dad! I love you! I'm sorry I said what I did! I'm really, really sorry! It'll never happen again, I promise!" I said while fighting to keep from bawling. "You have no idea how happy I am to hear that, son! I want you to know something Billy. And it may be the most important thing I ever say to you. I love you. I've always loved you and I always will love you. No matter what you say, no matter what you may do, know that I will love you no matter what. Even if we say something that infuriates each other, know that if I'm angry it's only for a little while. But I will love you forever." I couldn't think of anything to say. All I knew was that it felt so good to hear my dad say those words to me that I couldn't help myself and my tears flowed freely. I had no idea how much I needed to hear my dad say that he loved me no matter what. I wanted so much to just touch him. A hug, a kiss, something... I wanted to just be near him. I hadn't realized until then just how much he had been hurt by our fight, too. And no matter how strong I thought I was, I needed my dad more than ever. "Billy. I'm going to let you go. I want you to stay strong for me, boy. I need your strength to get me through this. I love you, Billy. Everything's going to work out... You'll see." "I... love you... too... dad!" I said between sobs. Then we hung up. Then I put my head down on Dr. Reilly's desk and had a good long cry. I needed to just let myself go and let out all of the emotions that had just eaten away at my very soul. The anger and hatred that I felt toward my dad were gone. The pain and humiliation of getting slapped faded away. In their place, came a new respect and a love deeper than I had ever felt before. My dad was going through the most difficult challenge of his life, and he wanted to make sure that I knew he loved me and that he was sorry that he did something stupid. I felt more loved at that moment than I had ever felt before. When I had cried myself out, I picked myself up out of the chair and made my way back to Brett's room. "What's wrong?" He asked, noticing right away that I'd been crying. "Nothing's wrong. Things have never been better." I said as my eyes welled up yet again. "Your dad woke up, didn't he?" Brett said. "Yeah... We worked things out." "You did? That's terrific, Billy! I knew your dad would make you feel better when he woke up!" "Hey Brett... Thanks." "Thanks for what?" He asked, slightly confused. "Thanks for everything, I guess. I don't think I could have made it through all this without you. My dad, the deal with my hand, Dustin. You've been here for me through all of it, trying to make me feel better, making me laugh when I needed it. Letting me vent... You're the best boyfriend a guy could ever have." Brett gave me a weird look. "What did you call me?" "I didn't call you anything..." "Yeah, you said that I'm the best "boyfriend" a guy could have. Do you really mean that? Do you think of my as your boyfriend?" "Well, yeah... I guess. I never really thought about it before. You don't mind do you? You don't think it's weird do you?" "I think it's the most awesome thing I've ever heard." And now Brett was the one who looked like he was about to cry. He didn't though. Brett almost never cries. I think I cry more than any boy I know. "I want you to do something for me, Brett." "Anything you want, I'll do it." "I just want you to..." Just then the door opened and Dr. Reilly peeked in. Damn damn damn!!! "So, did everything turn out okay?" She asked. "He's awake. We're not mad at each other anymore." I said. "It feels good doesn't it?" She said winking at me. "I haven't been this happy in a long time." I said. "Billy, you are a wonderful boy. By the way, your mom called me back. She wanted to discuss something you two had talked about. I couldn't agree with you more, Billy. Goodnight boys." With that, she closed the door and left us alone. "What was that about?" Brett asked, now really confused! "Oh, nothing... Just a little issue we had to deal with." I said happily. "So what do you want me to do?" Brett asked. "This..." I said. Then I kissed him. It felt so perfect. My whole body felt like electricity. That was all I needed from him that night. That overwhelming urge that I felt to just have sex for the sake of having sex went away, at least for the moment. What I needed more than anything from him was love. To feel him close to me. When he held me close to him as we slept, I felt more loved and more happy than I had felt in a year. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Last chapter's closer was long, but It was important for me to say the things I did. So this closer will be really short. How short? This short... Next chapter is "Brett and Dustin." I've been looking forward to it for a long time. My email address is: vicioussquirrel@hotmail.com Write to me!!! A big "thank you" to everyone who wrote! I always appreciate all letters and love to talk about the story. See you next time.