Date: Sun, 15 Dec 2013 11:31:26 +1300 From: bob charles Subject: Washed Up (Gay / Young friends) chapter 24 Washed Up. Disclaimer: Warning: this story contains sexual content, contact between young boys, and other themes that may offend. If the subject matter offends you, is not to your tastes, or if you are under legal age for your area, then find something else to read. In the following story all names and events are completely fictional. Although I may mention a specific location, place, or person any resemblance to said people, location, or places is completely unintentional. Chapter 24: We finish up in the shower in a short time and Pierre gets out first. I shut off the shower, then join him and we both dry off, and start to get dressed. We have both gone for more formal clothing today, having felt like we were underdressed while we have been here. We have both opted for plain black knee length shorts, while I have gone for a white collared dress shirt which has blue stripes running down it. Pierre has gone for a smart looking dark blue polo shirt. He looks smart with the way he is dressed, and I think we both look more like we should given we are in the house of rich people. Happy with how we look and are dressed; we leave the bathroom so that we can put on some shoes and socks. I'm a little surprised upon entering the bedroom to notice the absence of Callum and Manuel, but we get our answer pretty quickly where they have gone. "It's about time you two finished in the shower, hurry up and grab a towel and meet us downstairs. We have a boat ride to go on remember!" Manuel's grandpa says enthusiastically. The surprising thing is that he doesn't seem to care about the length of our shower in the slightest, but I'm not going to complain just as long as he doesn't know what we were up to. ************ The worst part about having seen Manuel's granddad is now we both feel like we are over-dressed, because all the man had on was a white singlet, and shortish tan coloured shorts. We know it is too late to change our clothes now, so we are going to have to put up with it. I am hoping that we aren't going to be doing anything where I will regret my choice of clothes, because I have no idea what sort of boating we are going to be doing today. The good thing is we are yet to put on our shoes and socks, so we ditch that idea in favour of jandals because we figure they are going to be more comfortable to wear while out on a boat. We locate them swiftly and slip our feet into them, before heading downstairs and to the lounge where we expect everyone else to be. We enter the lounge and see most of the adults in there, but not the one who we are looking for. We hear a yell coming from the front door, so turn to look and see Manuel's granddad and the two boys waiting there for us. Pierre turns and briskly walks over to them, but I don't follow, at least not straight away. "Um, is there any chance of either François or Sarah coming with us, because I think we may need someone else?" I ask, whilst looking directly at mum, hoping she understands the reason for the request. "Yes, sure, um... François, do you want to go with them, because I could do with Sarah here?" mum replies, ensuring François is willing to come along with us. She needn't have bothered, because I think he was hoping to get an excuse to get out of having a discussion with the others, because he feels it doesn't have anything to do with him. "Yeah, I'm happy to go along with them," he says, trying to contain his excitement, while he gets out of his seat and walks rapidly towards the front door, taking my hand along the way. "Thank you very much for bailing me out of that, but I know why you did. If you are right then I know you will freak Manuel's grandpa out, so you need someone to be there for support, am I right?" he whispers, while we are heading towards the others. I don't reply because there is no need to, all I do is nod my head while we leave through the door and join the rest. Callum and Manuel are bouncing around like loons, because they are eager to get out on the boat and enjoy the water, while Manuel's grandpa and Pierre are trying to calm them down enough so he can explain things to them. Once François and I make it outside the boys do calm down, because they know that François will find a way to make them otherwise. I have to try hard not to crack up laughing when I see how quick they are to settle down, because it shows how much François is able to control them. I know they aren't scared of him, but he has managed to get them to show him respect in how they act around him, which answers the question which has been bugging me for a while - how he can share a room with them for so long. Manuel's grandpa and Pierre are as equally amazed at the respect the boys show François as I am. "Ok, let me explain a little bit about what we are going to be doing today. I am a sailing instructor, so I decided to give you all a sailing lesson, because it was a good excuse to get out of the house and away from any serious conversation," he says with a chuckle. "I can help with that, because I used to do a lot of sailing," Pierre replies, feeling happy about the man's idea, because he thoroughly loves sailing and it is his chance to share an experience with me, especially since I have shown him about the joys of surfing. Since that day he has wanted to be able to share his passion with me, but has never had the opportunity until now. "That is great, it will be handy to have an extra pair of hands. I have not taught a group so young before, so I am going to need your help," he says, showing some obvious relief at the same time, because he was feeling a bit daunted with the task at hand. He is used to teaching adults, or older teens, say eighteen or nineteen, but not young kids. The way Callum and Manuel had been acting before had also made the man wonder whether he was going to have his hands full, but knowing that Pierre knows what he is doing puts him at ease. François has also helped with that, because he knows the two youngest boys will behave themselves and listen, because the last thing he wants is for one of them to get hurt. "Pierre and Josh, I will pair you together and because of Pierre's experience I will put you on the mainsail. Callum and François I will get you on the jib, and Manuel I will show you how to steer the boat. Don't worry, you will all get your turns on all the different parts, but this is how I want to start things," he says. He then takes us into the garage, where he has all his teaching aids for preparing his classes before he takes them out on the water. We have a long and thorough briefing about all the different things to know, and be mindful of, to do with sailing. He explains all the different terms and parts of the boat, along with what our jobs are going to entail. I quickly discover why he wants Pierre and me on the mainsail. It is because we are in the most prone position on the boat in terms of safety, and will have to keep a constant eye out for what the boom is doing, so we don't get hit on the head or anything like that. I am glad to have Pierre with me after hearing this, because I know he won't let me down and will be a great person to learn from. Manuel's grandpa would be equally as good, but I know Pierre will do everything he can to ensure I stay safe, and more importantly, have fun. I can feel his passion for the sport, so I know he is as enthusiastic about it as I am with surfing. I can feel my own excitement growing, because it seems to be flowing from Pierre into me, almost like he is infecting me with his sailing bug. I am at the stage where I can't wait to get out to the boat and onto the water. Once the briefing is over, Manuel's grandpa leads us through a door at the back of the garage to a steep pathway carved into the side of the cliff. We negotiate our way along the path, which isn't as bad as it first looked, because they have built in nice sized steps to make the descent safe and easy. It is a long but beautiful path, which slowly lowers us towards the sea. The good thing is the bushes and trees growing perilously on the side of the cliff manage to grow high enough to provide us with shelter from the sweltering Mediterranean sun. At the bottom is a long wooden pontoon stretching out from the cliff face into the sea. It has wooden posts jutting up from the deck every five or so metres with a rope connecting all of them, acting as a handrail and also to stop people from falling off the side. At the end of the pontoon a decent sized sloop sailboat is moored to it. Manuel's grandpa explained to us that we would be using a sloop and also explained that it is a sailboat which only has one mast, with the jib sail rigged up at the front of it, and the mainsail at the back. The pontoon bobs up and down while we walk along it. It is an unusual feeling for me, because I'm not used to it; the last time I walked along that type of dock was at Paihia, but that was a lot more solidly built and didn't move as much. We get to the end and climb onto the sailboat one by one. We are each shown what our duties are by Manuel's grandpa, while he also explains all the different parts of the boat and their functions. While he is doing this he is also making a visual inspection of all the equipment to ensure it is all in working order. Once he is satisfied that we all know how everything operates, he starts up the outboard motor and gets Pierre to untie the mooring ropes. The motor answers the question I had in my mind, which was how we were going to get out to sea, given there is not even the slightest breath of wind due to the cliffs blocking it. The water is so calm here that it looks like glass, and the scenery around us reflects off the crystal clear water almost like looking into a mirror. Pierre expertly unties the mooring ropes, and then jumps back on the boat before Manuel's grandpa pulls on the throttle, making the sailboat slowly pull away from the pontoon. It is smooth sailing while we slowly motor our way out into the open sea in search of some wind. Up on the top of the mast there is a windex, or wind direction indicator, and we are all watching it eagerly, wishing it to start showing some signs of at least a breeze. We motor about five nautical miles into the Mediterranean Sea before we find enough wind to be able to set sail. Manuel's grandpa then lines the boat up with the wind, so that the bow is pointing directly into the wind, because he says it makes it easier to set sail. He uses the motor to keep us pointing the right direction, while he gives us the instructions for what we are going to have to do. He is more giving the instructions to François and Callum, because Pierre is telling me what to do. Our first step is to shackle the bottom of the sails to the boom. Pierre and I get the mainsail shackled in no time, while François and Callum take a little longer. Them taking a little longer than us isn't important anyway, because Pierre and I have to hoist the mainsail first. We finish hooking it up, before finally hoisting it all the way to the halyard which stops it. The sail is luffing (flapping about like crazy), but Pierre isn't worried, he just shows me the last couple of steps before indicating to Manuel's grandpa that we are ready. It is now François and Callum's turn and they know it, but under clear precise instruction they hoist the jib sail flawlessly and also trim their sail for the wind. Once that has been done it is Pierre's and my turn again. This time we have to set the sail trim for the wind, which Pierre does expertly while he explains carefully what he is doing, making sure that I understand everything while he does it. Once he has completed this our job is done and we are ready to sail. To stop the mainsail luffing, Manuel is told by his grandpa to bear off (steer away from the wind), and with that we are sailing. Every so often Manuel is told to tack or jibe, which is when I need to be aware of the boom while it swings across. I quickly get used to keeping an eye on the boom, whilst trying to pay attention to everything else that is going on. Once I have got used to this sailing thing I start to understand why Pierre loves it so much, because it is peaceful and serene which are the same reasons I love surfing. It is slow, smooth sailing, due to the lack of wind making the sea almost dead flat and hardly any chop to speak of. It isn't quite perfect sailing conditions because we would preferably have more wind, given the choice, but it is still a pleasant way to spend the day. It doesn't take long before the heat from the sun starts to cook us, so we all remove our shirts in an effort to cool ourselves down, but it doesn't have the desired effect. The heat does little to curb our enjoyment, which can be plainly seen on our faces, especially when it is our turn on the tiller to control the boat. We slowly sail along the coast away from Marseille, but unlike what Pierre had expected we aren't heading towards the Côte-d'Azur, instead we are heading the other way. It is a unique experience viewing the land from the sea, and sailing along the coastline we get to see a lot more of it than I'm used to with surfing. It is a beautiful way to travel and see the world, so I can now see why Pierre's dad sold up everything in order to do this. The thought makes me remember the reason I asked for François to come along with us, and I am quite surprised that Pierre hasn't started to recall the yachting accident which claimed his father. I hope he does for his sake, but I also want to get the flashback over and done with, because I know I will go through the whole horrible saga along with him. I am scared about the thought because it could ruin my enjoyment of the experience, but for now nothing is happening, so I try to let my mind rest. After a long time of sailing, Manuel's grandpa navigates his way into a secluded little bay, and drops anchor. While he is anchoring the boat, Pierre shows us how to lower the sails so that they are easy to hoist again when we need to leave. Once safely anchored the man pulls out a bag of sandwiches and hands us each one along with a bottle of orange juice. No surprises in guessing that they didn't last very long, because we are all feeling famished from learning how to sail. The bay is beautiful; it has gorgeous orange clay cliffs seemingly jutting straight out of the water. The top of the cliffs is full of stunning Mediterranean bush and scrub, along with the occasional tree standing tall and proud amongst the smaller greenery. At the base of the cliffs seems to be a little pebbly beach, which is sort of a greyish yellow colour, but looks like an inviting place to lie and sunbathe naked without worrying about anyone intruding on you. The thought intrigues me as I think back to Pierre telling us that his parents used to be nudists, because I would love to experience the freedom of being able to roam around in the buff. Yeah, yeah, I know we did that the other day while at the Pont du Gard, but that was totally unintentional, because we hadn't planned on Manuel throwing our togs onto the river bank. It did feel awesome though, and I would love to be able to experience it properly. "Ok, we will be anchored here for the next couple of hours, so you are free to do what you like. This bay is secluded and safe, with no need to worry about anyone else coming here, so you have the place to yourselves. Since I presume you will want to swim I will set up the diving board for you," Manuel's grandpa says, before going to find the diving board he has and setting it up. I love the sound of the idea of being able to do what we like, but I wish the boat was anchored further away from the beach, so I could do some nude sunbathing. It is too close to risk it because I don't want Manuel's grandpa to think we are rude or anything. I will make the most of the area to have a good swim and sunbathe to try to get my tan back, because my skin is still very pale. I think Pierre has the same idea as I do, because his skin is almost as pale as mine and I know he desperately wants to get his tan back, not that I'm worried about it. Callum and Manuel have other plans. They have no hesitation about getting nude, which again shows how much confidence Manuel has given my little brother. The reason they don't have any qualms about stripping off is, as I notice for the first time, because they have dressed even more formally than Pierre and I have. They both have worn pants, with Callum in light blue cotton jeans and Manuel wearing black corduroy trousers, so they don't have much option if they want to swim. Well, that isn't entirely true, because they could have swum in their undies, but like Pierre and me, neither of them bothered to wear any. So they strip off their pants, which leaves them in their birthday suits, before they go over to the diving board Manuel's grandpa has set up, and jump off into the glistening azure waters of the Mediterranean. I can't get over how audacious the boys are as they walk straight past Manuel's grandpa, naturally as anything, before taking turns and diving into the water. Seeing how unconcerned the man is with the youngsters being naked, makes me wonder whether this is why he specifically chose the area. I reconsider my options, trying to decide if I'm game enough to follow the younger boys' example or whether I still should show some respect towards the man. Pierre makes my mind up for me, because in the time I had spent trying to make up my mind, he had already stripped, and has now begun to yank my shorts down so that I'm wearing the same as everyone else. I can feel my groin starting to stir from the sensation of having my shorts pulled down while I'm standing in front of the adults. That is the last thing I want is to spring a stiffie in front of Manuel's grandpa. I don't mind being seen naked but being seen aroused on top of that would be too much for me to handle. I try not to think too much more about it, and step out of my shorts once Pierre has them down at my ankles, then hurriedly make my way to the diving board and jump into the water. I do the best bomb I am able to, trying to scatter as much water as I can over the younger boys, who aren't too far away from where I land. I make contact with the water with what seems to me like a tremendous splash, before submerging what feels like metres under the surface. The water is pleasantly warm which catches me a little off guard, because I hadn't expected it to be this warm given it is only early summer. I try to open my eyes whilst under the water, but it is a little too murky to see and the salt water stings my eyes, forcing me to close them again, so I decide to surface, given underwater swimming is out of the question. I am immediately greeted once I resurface, by water getting splashed at me from all directions, with the largest volume coming from Pierre who has leapt into the sea not too far from me. Callum and Manuel have also decided to pay me back for splashing them, by throwing water at me as I surface and try to get my bearings, but after Pierre's bomb they have now turned their attention to getting him back, well, once he has surfaced that is. I help them out with getting my boyfriend back, so the moment his head breaks the surface, he gets bombarded by water from all directions. We soon tire of splashing him, mainly due to the fact that he is already wet, so the activity is pretty much pointless. I indicate to Pierre once he has wiped the water from his eyes so he can see again, that I want go into the beach and then swim off, hoping he is following. He does, but Callum and Manuel also decide to follow us, which I didn't want so much. I won't stop them from coming along with us, because I love them too much for that, but I had been hoping to spend some alone time with Pierre on the beach, sunbathing and enjoying each other's company. The other two want to be with us because they feel like they haven't seen enough of us lately, due to Pierre and I being in hospital for so long, so any chance they get with us they are going to make the most of. It is quite a long swim into the beach, because it is further away than it looked from the boat, so by the time we make it to shore we are all pretty tired. My lack of fitness is rearing its ugly head once more and I'm rueing the amount of time we spent in the hospital again. I should be able to swim this sort of distance a piece of cake, but from being stuck in a bed for so long I haven't been able to keep up with any proper fitness regime. Not that I've ever had one, but through surfing, fishing, rowing our dinghy while we were at Taupo Bay and of course mucking around with Callum, I used to keep my fitness levels pretty high. Now I am struggling to swim a similar distance to that which I normally have to paddle on a surf board to get out the back of the breakers, and the worst part is that the water here is perfectly calm and smooth, so should make swimming easier than battling against broken waves. I'm not the only one showing fatigue from the swim and lack of fitness, because all the others look the same way too, which surprises me, because I thought Callum's fitness levels would have still been pretty good, but then again we haven't done much rigorous exercise in a long time. The more I think about it the more I realise just how long it has been since we did any real exercise. We haven't done much in that regard the whole time we have been in France, and due to the depression Callum and I were in while we lived in New Plymouth, we didn't get any exercise there either. Well, if you discount the little fight I had, but that wasn't exercise because it was only one punch. So the last time we would have done anything would have been while we were still at Taupo Bay, which seems like an eternity ago. We drag ourselves onto the pebbly beach, gasping and panting for breath after the exertion from the swim. Luckily we are here for a couple of hours, so we have plenty of time to recuperate for the swim back. In the meantime I lie down on the beach exhausted, and enjoy the sun beating down on me. Pierre lies beside me, and we both wrap an arm around each other, without really thinking about it, and enjoy the comfort the other brings, at the same time as soaking up as much UV as we can. Callum and Manuel, now realising the reason we wanted to swim to the beach, are a little disappointed because they were hoping we would want to play or explore or something, not sunbathe, because despite being tired from the swim they still have a lot of pent up energy. The two boys sit for a little while to recover from the swim, whilst hoping Pierre and I are doing the same thing, but once they realise we have no intention of moving for a while, they get up and go to explore. I feel a bit guilty for not wanting to spend time with the younger two boys, especially after everything we have put them through, and I know Pierre is feeling the same way, so we reluctantly sit up and look around for them. They have gone down to the far end of the beach by the time we spot them. Now we know where they are, we struggle to our feet and wander in their direction. The beach is longer than it looks and it takes a while to make it to where the boys had been, but they have disappeared by the time we make it. I had seen them heading into the scrub at the bottom of the cliff, but after that I have no idea. Pierre and I scour the area, trying to find the spot that they disappeared into the scrub from, but it is too dense to have gone into without breaking any branches, and there are no broken branches anywhere to be seen. We backtrack along the beach, searching the scrub for a place that the boys could have entered through. It takes a little while but eventually we find a little clearing, easily big enough for the two smaller boys to go through, but Pierre and I are going to risk getting scratched up from the branches. We edge our way into the clearing, trying hard not to get scratched, which wouldn't have been so bad if we had clothes on, but being naked we have a lot of vulnerable skin exposed. Once we are past the initial scrub, the clearing becomes a lot bigger and there seems to be a pathway, but it goes in both directions so god only knows which way the boys have gone. I decide to head in the direction that leads towards the end of the beach first, because logic tells me that it is going to be the shortest part of the path, and after about fifty or so metres the path peters out in front of a cave. The cave entrance isn't very big, but it seems to go deep into the cliff face. It is the right sort of area for those two rascals to have decided to explore, but it has me a bit worried because we don't have a light of any kind, so if something happens we are going to have to negotiate our way through it in the dark. I think about yelling in through the entrance, but am scared off from remembering all those movies which show tons of bats escaping from a cave like this. It is stupid because I know nothing will happen if I yell into it, but the thought still puts me off. I am half tempted to leave the cave for last and head back up the track to see if Callum and Manuel are there, but my gut tells me that this is the sort of place those two couldn't pass up to explore. It is hard enough for me not to want to explore it as well. I love exploring things like this, but what is bugging me is I'm on a search mission and this is the sort of place I don't want to be searching for anyone. It is the sort of place I would explore on my own, but I would never intentionally take anyone else in there with me, because it isn't a safe place to be, and I know that. "Pierre, you wait here and I'll go..." I start to say. "Like hell you will, I'm coming with you whether you like it or..." Pierre starts to retort, after having interrupted me. "No, I want you out here, where it is safe. I don't want you to get hurt again. I'm going in there on my own, and that's final," I tell him, also stopping him short in what he was saying. I know I'm not going to win, but I am pig headed and I don't want to see him follow me or get hurt. Callum is my brother so I feel he is my responsibility. "I will not let you go in there alone. After all they are as much my brothers as they are yours, so I am going to..." he tells me flatly, reminding me that he has grown as attached to the little buggers as I have. "Hey cool... you guys found a cave!" the high pitched voice of Callum says excitedly behind us, causing both of us to jump a mile. "Wow, can we explore, can we, can we, can we?" Manuel asks, whilst bouncing around, unable to contain his excitement. "No... um... No! Where the hell did you come from?" I ask, a little irritated at them. "Awww, but why?" Manuel says, unable to contain his disappointment, but totally ignoring the question I asked them. "Um... we went the other way up the path. I think it goes all the way to the top of the cliff, but we only followed it part way because it was getting too long," Callum replies a little dejectedly, because he knows he had me worried shitless, which he never intended to do. There is also an element of disappointment in his voice since he knows they won't be allowed to explore the cave Pierre and I had discovered. "You sure you don't want to explore the cave?" Manuel asks pleadingly, with a sad puppy dog look on his face. It looks so pathetic, but adorable and almost impossible to resist. "No... um... oh fuck... Pierre and I will go and take a look to see if it is a good idea or not," I tell them, caving into Manuel. I was actually looking forward to going in and having a look, but since there was no longer a need to do so, I wrote the idea off. Now with Manuel's begging, it gives me a chance, at least, to go do some exploring and if I decide it is safe I will let the youngsters go in. "Cool, cool, cool, so hope we can go in too!" Callum says, bouncing around all over again. Manuel is just as excited, if not a little bit more than Callum is, and I can tell that it is going to be very hard to tell them it is too dangerous to go into, if that is the case. Knowing I have no choice but to go in, not that it bothers me, I head back to the entrance to the cave. I have to get down on my knees and crawl in through the opening, because it is too small for me to walk in, so I'm going to have to be careful not to scuff my legs up. The ground is hard and uncomfortable to crawl over and the light disappears quickly, once I have entered, but I continue to inch along. Once fully enclosed by the walls of the cave, I think I can vaguely make out a glow a little off to the side of me, so I continue to crawl along in that direction. The closer I get the brighter the glow gets, but it is awkward and slow due to having to clamber over numerous wet slippery rocks along the way. Somehow I haven't cut myself up, but I am regretting being in the buff while doing this. I have too much precious cargo hanging about, which I could easily damage if I'm not careful. At least clothes offer a bit of protection to areas like that. The other thing I am noticing is how cold it is in here, and I can feel goose bumps forming all over my body, which also gives the occasional involuntary shudder. It is very dark, but not totally silent as I had been expecting. You can hear water running down the wall, or dripping from the roof, but the biggest noise I can hear is in the form of little waves breaking against the rocks. This indicates that the cave must open up somewhere along the coast, otherwise I shouldn't be able to hear the waves breaking, well that is my way of thinking. It feels cool to be exploring the unknown, which gets me wondering about how many other people know about this cave, let alone how many of those have actually explored it. I'm hoping we are the first, so we can call ourselves true pioneers, exploring this unknown subterranean land before anyone else, but I doubt we would be the first. I still love the way it allows my imagination to run free as I wonder how spectacular this place would look if we had some form of lighting. The bats then return to my head, which sort of makes me glad we can't see what else is in here. Aside from hearing the occasional grunt from Pierre, I almost forget he is with me. I am hoping he is following me because we haven't communicated much, aside from me telling him to head towards the glow. It is now I realise that we should have had some rope or something to tie us together to ensure we don't get separated, but it is too late to do anything about that now. I make a mental note that if we are to bring the other two in here; it is going to be on the basis we can find something to tie us all together. I can't have either of them getting lost, because it would destroy me if something bad happened to either of them. The glow gets brighter and brighter, the closer to it I get, then suddenly the world seems to open up right in front of my eyes, and I find myself in a huge cavern with the sea water lapping away at the rocks. The tide must be in and has flooded the floor of the cavern, which means we are limited to wandering around the edge, against the wall, or going for a swim in order to explore the area. For the moment I don't bother to explore, but I get to my feet because my knees are so sore I don't want to be on them any longer. There is ample room for standing now because the roof rises sharply, but I still have to be aware of the occasional low hanging rock, or the stalactites hanging from the roof of the cavern. The constant beating the stalactites receive from waves has hindered the amount of growth they have been able to achieve, which means most of them only hang from the roof a metre or so. There aren't those huge ones almost reaching the floor, like you see in other caves around the world, but the sight is just as spectacular anyway. The entrance is huge and gives and awesome view out over the Mediterranean sea, and the light pours in which makes it warmer in here than it had been in the other part of the cave. Pierre makes it a short time after me, and is as dazzled by the sight as I am. It is truly spectacular and like nothing I have ever seen before, but the best part was the experience and feeling like we were pioneer explorers discovering the inner beauties of the cave for the first time. Nothing beats that feeling, even though we realise others must have been here before us, but a kid's imagination can't be beaten at times. That is why I liked it so much, because it is again a chance I have had to rekindle my lost childhood. We stand there admiring the awesome scenery for a few minutes, before we decide we had better go back, because the boys will be getting antsy waiting for us by now. I don't want them to do something stupid, like follow us in here, because I have a feeling it would be pretty easy to get lost due to how dark the tunnel is, which sort of implies that it might continue on in a different direction and that is why I'm sort of dreading the return crawl. Callum is usually pretty level-headed which is why I'm not so worried about him, but I'm unsure about Manuel. He seems to be a happy go lucky sort of character at times, which has me a little on edge about whether he might convince Callum to follow us in here. I sigh loudly thinking about that, because I realise we had better go back now and not keep them waiting too long. Reluctantly I head back to the portal we had used to get here and get back on my knees so I can crawl again. My knees scream out in pain and protest as I lower myself down on them, but I try to block it all out. I am going to have to bear the pain for a little while longer, so I start to crawl my way back. There is no thought about swimming back as I'm still feeling shattered after the swim from the boat. The other problem with that idea is we aren't entirely sure where this cave entrance is, for all we know it could be in a totally different bay. It is a little unnerving how quickly the light fades into oblivion, and I start to get worried when I can't see any glow indicating the entrance we had come in through. It takes a little while for my eyes to readjust to the almost pitch black, but once they have I can finally see the vague distant glow of the opening. I feel Pierre try and hold my leg, because he wants us to stay connected for the trip back for safety reasons, but it becomes too difficult and awkward to try to hold onto me while crawling along, so he lets go. The return trip doesn't seem to take as long, but we know more about what to expect in there which makes life a lot easier. We still move at a snail's pace, because we don't want to meet an unexpected surprise and get hurt. Nothing untoward comes up and we make it through the worst part with no bumps or bruises, other than that on our knees because they aren't used to this sort of punishment. We both squint in agony when we go out of the opening and back into the bright sunny outdoors world, because it is far too bright for our eyes, which seem to take forever to readjust. My worst fears are realised once my eyes have readjusted to the light, because Callum and Manuel are nowhere to be seen. I look around everywhere hoping they have wandered off for some reason while they have been waiting, but I can't see any sign of them. I am on the verge of panic, thinking they have gone into the cave and we had somehow missed them. Pierre's expression is like mine, because he too is worried that the boys have done the stupid thing and tried to follow us. "Stop right there and don't move!" a voice says loudly, at the same time as I feel something sharp getting pressed against my back. I do as I'm told and freeze instantly, wondering what the hell I have managed to get myself into this time. Pierre is frozen beside me, so I try to take a sneak peek out of my peripheral vision to see if I can make out what is happening. The only thing I can see is a stick getting jabbed into his back. The odd thing about the stick is it looks to be very crudely made, because it still has little branches coming off it with leaves attached. All the spears I have seen of this fashion are usually carved relatively smoothly; at least they don't still have little branches jutting out from them, so I instantly start to smell a rat. I decide to call their bluff, and suddenly step forward and twist my body around. I almost crack up laughing with what I see, because I am greeted by Callum, who is wearing a makeshift grass skirt as well as a grass halo type thing on his head. He has found some mud and tried to colour his face to look intimidating and he is holding a long branch like it is a spear. Manuel has a similar sort of outfit on, because the boys had decided to dress up and play around like tribesmen. I don't know how they managed to make up those skirts in such a short amount of time, but they did a really good job, because neither of them has to hold them up, or readjust them in any way. They are long enough to stretch all the way down to their knees, and seem to be made up from some flax-like plant. I'm not talking four or five pieces of flax either, because they have fashioned them so well that they hide everything, except their thighs when they walk. "Uh, uh, uh, don't think you are going anywhere. You're gonna do what we tell you to do!" Callum demands in as menacing a tone as he can achieve, whilst poking me in the stomach with the stick. I take one look at the stick and decide the safest thing to do is go along with them. I can tell Pierre is thinking the same, because without clothes we leave ourselves vulnerable to getting hurt from incidental contact. I know neither boy would deliberately hurt us, but accidents do happen. So not willing to take any chances we go along with the boys' commands. The two boys prod us along until we are at the base of a tree, then Manuel drops his stick, while Callum stands guarding us. Manuel now positions us so that our backs are against the trunk of the tree and he also spreads our legs, all while my brother keeps his stick pointed at us. If this is going where I think it is going, then I'm not sure I want to go through with this any more. I know they are only playing, but there is something about the way they have Pierre and I backed up against the tree which bothers me. Sure enough, Manuel confirms my fears moments later when he pulls a couple of makeshift ropes out from the other side of the trunk. Yet again, I see the ropes are made out of the same flax as their grass skirts, which astounds me that the two youngsters had enough time to plan all this and make everything while Pierre and I were in the cave. We must have been away a lot longer than it seemed, which makes me wonder about how long we have left before we need to think about swimming back to the boat. "Right, we are gonna tie you up, then we will run away while you try to get out. Once you are free you have to catch us and tie us up to the tree so we can escape," Callum tells us. I am impressed that they have managed to come up with some sort of game, especially after all the effort they went into to dress the part, but the time is starting to play on my mind because I think we have all lost track of it. "Ok... I think... I don't know if we are going to have much time for this, because it must be getting close to the time we need to be heading back...! Anyway, outta interest you two, where did you learn how to make those grass skirts?" I ask. Callum starts beaming in pride from my comment, which makes me realise it was him who knew how to do it. "I learned it in Maori class at school, and got an A+ for my skill and craftsmanship on the ones we had to make. While you were away, I started to realise we weren't gonna get time to explore the cave again with you, so I decided to teach Manuel how to make these, and he came up with the idea for the game," he says, feeling more and more proud of their efforts the more he tells us about it. While Callum and I have been having our conversation, Manuel has started to tie Pierre to the tree. Manuel has crudely bound his hands around the trunk of the tree, which he has his back against, and is now working on tying his legs up. Tying up Pierre's legs is causing a bit of a problem for the boy, because he doesn't want to him to lose balance since that could hurt him, so he has to carefully plan how he is going to do it. He decides in the end not to tie up each leg individually, but to lash both legs below the knees to the tree trunk while coiling the flax rope up his legs towards his thigh, which effectively binds him to the trunk. Once Manuel is happy that he has Pierre secure enough, he starts to work on me, tying me up the same way as he did to Pierre, which makes things worse for my lover because he is doubly roped against the trunk. It feels strange getting tied up, but I wouldn't say it is a pleasant feeling, because it reminds me I have felt trapped and bound to a heavy weight for so long in my life, which starts to bring all that misery back. The pathetic and helpless feeling I had during my depression comes flooding back and I fight to keep control of my emotions, because I know this is only a game the youngsters want to play, so don't want to disappoint them. "Manuel, stop, I think this is too much for Josh, and probably Pierre as well," a concerned Callum says, because he has picked up on the vibes coming from me and he realises that being bound like this is a similar feeling to how it felt while depressed. Without being physically bound to the tree Callum can still feel the same emotions as have flooded my mind. Pierre is living the same emotions too, but because he is bound on the opposite side of the tree to me I can't see him. I might have been able to feel his emotions, if my own hadn't got in the way, but then again maybe that is why the feelings are so strong. I mean being bound to a tree shouldn't bring on emotions this strong should it? I am starting to believe that they may be doubled up through Pierre feeling the same things, but I can't believe Callum is feeling them too. I know Callum and I have a strong brotherly bond, but I never thought it was that strong. In saying that he did go through the same depression I had when Pierre was ripped out of our lives a while ago, so that might explain a bit about how he is feeling what I am. The strange thing is I can see his body trembling from the strength of the emotions coursing through him. I can't understand that reaction because my body isn't shaking, which leads me to believe that Pierre's isn't either. It might be the image of seeing us physically bound which has set him off, but I can't be sure. Without needing to be told, Manuel has started to unfasten the binding he has put on Pierre and I. Callum comes over to help, but I can tell something is wrong with him. He seems to be upset, which I wonder is whether he is feeling bad about doing this, but then again he could still be feeling what we were before, so I say nothing about it. It's not because I don't care, but more I don't want to bring it up again and make him feel bad about it, because they were playing around and never meant for this to happen. "I'm sorry, I should have known better. I knew it was a bad idea, I knew it, knew it..." Callum sobs, before breaking down in tears. I should have known this is how he is feeling, and I'm a little annoyed at myself for disregarding my initial thoughts about what is wrong with him. "Callum and Manuel, this was neither of your fault, because it was just supposed to be a game. No one knew that we were going to feel so uncomfortable about it, so how can you blame yourselves for it?" I ask them, while embracing Callum in a brotherly hug, now that I have been freed from my bindings. I figured I should include Manuel in my speech, because I know that deep down he too is feeling bad. "I can blame myself, because you're my brother so I should have known this wouldn't go down right. I should know these things, just like you know what upsets me," he blubbers in response, because he thoroughly believes he should have known that I wouldn't handle getting tied up after all I have been through. "Callum, don't be stupid. Don't you think I would have stopped you long before you tied us up, if I knew I wasn't going to handle it? I don't like upsetting you, but I still would have stopped you, because I know you would get more upset if I didn't. At the time I had no problems with your idea, other than thinking it was a little strange," I tell him sternly, trying to stop him blaming himself by telling him off. It works, because he never expected a growling from me. I only ever growl at him when he has done something stupid which could have got him in serious trouble, so he knows I meant what I said. The surprise of having been told off has snapped him out of his sulk, so he is no longer crying, but it has had the added effect of stopping him from blaming himself. He knows I am right and I wouldn't have let them go through with the plans if I knew I wasn't going to be able to handle it, so there was no way for him to know either, therefore no reason to blame himself. I squeeze Callum in our hug in order to emphasise that all is alright, which causes him to hug me back. Once Manuel has finally released Pierre from his binds, he hugs the younger boy, which initially causes the boy to flinch because he wasn't sure what Pierre was up to. Once Manuel realises all Pierre wants to do is hug him, he allows it and cuddles back. Like Callum, Manuel needs the reassurance that they didn't do anything wrong, so Pierre giving him a hug is just what the doctor ordered. The two youngsters are holding us tightly in our hugs, because our reassurance is what they need so desperately at the moment. I love hugging Callum like this and to be honest I haven't done this anywhere near enough lately, so I think he has been feeling a little left out and he is definitely trying to make up for it now. At one stage the two of us were hugging almost every day, but to be honest, that was because we were cowering away from our raging father. Once dad left we continued to cuddle regularly, but now with Pierre in my life we don't spend much time together any more. Pierre has started to properly adopt Manuel as his younger sibling, and by the looks of it the younger boy has started to do the same, although a little timidly. I don't know why, but I'm sure Manuel is still scared about hurting Pierre, so is not totally comfortable hugging him still. He has come a long way from what he was like in the hospital, but is a little tentative around Pierre, which is surprising considering he throws himself at me. I'm not sure why Manuel has connected better with me than he has with Pierre, but it may have something to do with Callum. I can't say why exactly, but he seems to feed off my younger brother, and it is almost like he can sense what Callum is thinking. Even though Callum has become attached to Pierre, he has always been, and still is closer to me, so I think that is what Manuel has picked up on. Now with a bit of time, and of course the counselling he received from Alice, Manuel seems to be getting closer to Pierre again. He used to treat both of us equally, before all the drama happened when he became a little scared of Pierre, but it doesn't matter too much because Callum has, and always will be his favourite. We stay in our hugs for quite a long time. Manuel becomes noticeably closer and closer to Pierre the longer he spends in the embrace. I know from looking at him that he needs a proper bigger brother, and because I'm already sort of taken by Callum, he is adopting Pierre as his. Pierre is like Manuel in a lot of ways, because he too has grown up as an only child, always longing for another sibling. He is more than happy to be Manuel's older brother, because he adores the little boy so much, almost like he is his younger one. Even though we are all going to become one big family, we are still always going to be from different parents, aside from Callum and me, so for Pierre and Manuel it is more for a sense of belonging, than any other reason. "Come on, time to stop hugging, because it must be time we swam back to the boat," I say half-heartedly, before reluctantly releasing Callum from my embrace. The rest of them sigh, and moan a little in protest, while they also let go of each other. The moans aren't so much because we don't want to stop hugging, although we don't want that either, but they are more because we all realise we are in for a long swim back to the boat, which none of us are particularly ready for. I know I am still feeling a little sore and tired from the original swim over here, so the swim back is going to be a lot harder. I think the others are in the same boat, and haven't recuperated enough from the first swim. Even though we are still feeling tired and rueing that we didn't use some of our time ashore to relax, we head back along the path, searching for the clearing back to where we were when we came ashore. It doesn't take us too long to find the clearing and cautiously make our way through it to the beach. I look over my body once I'm back on the pebbly sand, and am pleasantly surprised to see I have got through the whole adventure without a scratch. I can also see that everyone else has accomplished the same feat, not that the others seem the slightest bit worried about whether they got a scratch or not. While we head towards the waterline, Callum and Manuel use the time to take off their grass skirts because they will be too much of a hindrance during the swim to continue wearing. The boat seems to be a lot further away now, but it is probably due to how tired I am and thinking about how long the swim is going to be. I can also make out what seems to be a figure swimming towards the beach, but it is still too far away to make out properly. All it tells me is it is time to start swimming back because it must be time to go. We wade out into the water until we are deep enough to be able to swim. I use the chance to stretch out my arms muscles, trying to free them up for the long swim back. Callum also stretches because it is something the two of us have got used to with surfing, while Pierre and Manuel have no idea what the two of us are doing. Once Pierre works out that we are stretching in preparation for the swim, he follows suit and Manuel copies everyone because he figures it must be the right thing to do, and he doesn't want to get left out. One by one as we reach a good depth to start swimming, we dive into the water and start the long paddle home. Callum and Manuel are the first of us to have to start swimming, because they are the shortest, so reach deep water first. I'm sure it becomes a bit of a game between Pierre and me to see who can walk out the furthest before having to resort to swimming. Initially I thought with all my experience in the water that it should be easy to outlast Pierre, but due to his boating experience he too has learned how to wade out as far as possible, so in the end it is an even matchup. We both finally decide to start swimming when the water starts to lap at the bottom of our mouths, so we know we aren't going to get any further. By this stage Callum and Manuel have swum a long way out in front of us, so our next challenge is to catch the youngsters before reaching the boat. Without needing to say anything to Pierre, I know he has the same idea as I have, so we both start paddling hard and fast, in an attempt to catch the young ones. We catch them surprisingly quickly, but that is due to them being a lot wiser than us two, and taking it easy. I can tell already that chasing them down was not a good idea, because my arms are aching and I'm short of breath. The worst part is the boat is still a long way off, so I'm going to have to continue to battle my exhausted body for a good while longer. The good thing is Pierre is in the same state as I am, so I'm not going to be alone in the battle to reach the boat. I also figure the natural competition will drive us both not to give up, and beat the other to the safety of the boat. It is steady but slow progress as we swim towards the boat, making me absolutely sure that the boat is further away than it was when we swam to the beach in the first place. We have to stop swimming about halfway across, because as I thought someone is swimming out to us. It is François, who is already looking as tired as we feel, but hugely relieved not to have to swim all the way to the beach and back. We all take a little bit of a rest; even though treading water is still tiring it isn't so bad on the arms. "Thank god you have decided to come back, because I really didn't fancy having to swim all the way to the beach. As soon as we are all back we will be heading back to Manuel's grandparents," he tells us, once we have all met up and he realises it is us. We don't waste any time on chatter, so once we are ready we start swimming again towards the boat, which still looks like it is a mile off. The closer we get to the boat the further away it seems to drift, and it is starting to become agonisingly painful and slow. After what seems like an eternity the boat is within reaching distance, and it is such a wicked feeling when I finally put my hand against the hull and know I have made it. Pierre is a little behind me, but not much, but the other two boys have drifted a long way back, and François is even further. I look around the boat hoping to find a ladder or something to make getting into the boat easier, but there is nothing. We are going to have to pull ourselves out of the water and onto the boat. The last thing either of us want to do is attempt to climb because our arms feel too sore and like jelly after the mammoth swim. The agonising part is we know we have no choice but to try to climb on board, because there is no other way around it. We both try to gather as much strength as we can, before we try to climb up the side. It takes a lot of effort just trying to reach high enough up the side to grab hold of something solid. Once we achieve that, we again gather our strength before attempting to heave ourselves out of the water and on board the boat. Thankfully we don't have to expend the energy yet, because Manuel's grandpa must have seen us attempting to get hold of something, so has come over to lend a hand by pulling us out of the water. He makes short work of yanking Pierre out of the water and onto the boat. He makes it look like Pierre is as light as a feather, so I can tell he has done this often. He has no problems pulling me out either, and I am caught off guard by how strong the elderly man is, because he sure as hell doesn't look it. Within seconds he pulls me out and onto the deck, which happens so quickly I almost fall over because my legs aren't ready to take my weight. The next thing I know is Callum is staggering around beside me, because he too has been hoisted aboard so fast he didn't have time to adjust. I didn't expect to see him so soon after I got out of the water, because the last I had seen of him he was well off our pace and miles behind. It must have taken us a lot longer than I thought to get Manuel's grandpa's attention, which is proven moments later when Manuel is also hoisted on board. François is the only one left to get on board, but he is still a ways off even reaching the boat, so Manuel's grandpa starts to get everything ready while we wait for him to catch up. Francois is really struggling to swim as far as the boat, because swimming has never been a strong point for him. It is sheer grit and determination which gets him as far as the boat, but we can tell he is completely shattered and is battling to even stay afloat now. Pierre, sensing the urgency of the situation, runs over to the edge of the boat and reaches over to grab hold of his uncle, while Manuel and Callum race over to help. I try to offer my assistance, but work out that I will end up getting in the road so they are best to do it themselves. With Manuel and Callum holding onto Pierre, and helping to pull him and François onto the boat, it all seems to be totally in control. Everything suddenly turns chaotic. I have no idea what happens to François, because everything around me suddenly goes black. The sea becomes savage; it seems to want to smash the boat into pieces, all the while it is being assisted by violent gale-force winds and torrential rain. Suddenly everything around me is brightly lit up by a tremendous flash of lightning, and I see my father, well Pierre's father, clinging onto the railing for dear life. He looks shit scared, but not willing to give up hope yet. I am his hope and need to pull him back onto the yacht as quickly as I can. I am scared beyond belief, and between the savage rocking of the yacht and the inconsistent lighting, due to having to wait for each flash of lightning to be able to see, all because the flashlight I`m carrying is hopeless, it makes it tough going to race over to where dad is hanging off the edge. Slipping and stumbling I make my way over to the railing which dad is hanging off. I have to try to be brave, because I have to save him. I don't want to lose the only parent I have left, because I don't think I could handle going through all that again. Losing mum was hard enough because I loved her to bits, but with only dad left, losing him will completely destroy me. Once at the edge I ditch the flashlight, because to be honest it is a waste of time and too much of a burden to continue carrying. The lightning is frequent enough that I can see relatively clearly most of the time, despite the torrential rain. I try in desperation to grab hold of dad and hoist him back onto the yacht. It is a struggle, but with his assistance we slowly seem to be making some headway, as his drenched heavy body starts to rise up the side. His eyes are full of the grit and determination I am feeling, but they suddenly change, along with the expression on his face. The look of a determined man changes instantly to one of sheer terror and helplessness. He becomes a dead weight, almost like he has seen something which has made him give up all hope. I don't want to turn around, but curiosity gets the better of me, so I do. I instantly regret the decision, because all I see is a wall of water from a gigantic wave towering overhead. It makes me feel so insignificant from its sheer size. The monstrous thing seems to be teetering there like it is trying to decide whether it is going to come crashing down on us or not. "Pierre, find somewhere safe to hide. You must save yourself son, go, save yourself!" dad screams in French, trying desperately to be heard over the wind, rain, thunder and of course the crashing of waves. I hear him, somehow over all the noise, so rip my attention away from the wave to my father. Something is wrong; I can see it on his face, and I'm not just talking about the wave threatening to come crashing down on us. His face looks like he has given up hope and almost apologetic, which confuses me. The answer comes moments later, startling the hell out of me, which causes me to scream loudly and makes me feel totally lost and confused. He lets go of the rail, and in slow motion I watch while he plunges into the violent sea, before it greedily swallows him up. I stand there hoping to see him emerge, because I need to know he is alive but I don't see him again. The image of him plunging into the angry unforgiving sea starts to play itself over and over again, like a broken record. The longer I keep replaying the sequence the more I start to notice these flashes of other information interrupting my thoughts. The image of dad's death becomes more broken up, before it is eventually replaced by all this other random information, which seems to be trying to tell me a story, but at the moment is still gobbledegook. Slowly the information starts to piece itself together, providing a clear picture of the story they are trying to tell. I am back at a funeral, its mum's funeral. I know this because I am gutted and can't stop crying. It is all too hard to stay in here, because I don't feel like I'm a strong enough person to cope with this. I don't want to get reminded of my loss, so why do I have to be here? I already know mum is dead, because I was there when it all happened. I can't take it any more, so without thinking about the scene I'm making I yell out some obscenities and run out of the chapel, barging through the solid oak doors like they were made of paper. I run as far as my legs will take me, before I break down in tears. By this stage I am at the side of the road, so I sit down on the edge of the sidewalk and hug my knees, while rocking back and forth. I need mum, because she knows how to make me feel better, but I know that won't happen. I am here for that reason, but I don't like the constant reminder. Someone quietly sits down beside me, before giving me a huge hug. I can tell it is dad, because of the way he is hugging me. He is as devastated as I am about it, which means my outburst gave him the perfect excuse to get away from the funeral, because it was eating him up as badly as it was me. Piece by piece I relive Pierre's life from his mum's funeral through to his dad getting washed off the boat, and of course Pierre himself nearly dying. Although Pierre and his father seemed to have fun while travelling the world on the yacht, I can tell it was all just a façade, because neither of them was coping particularly well with the loss of Pierre's mum. It was constantly gnawing away at the two of them, preventing them from feeling any real happiness, but they both never noticed the effect it was having on them. Reliving it through Pierre's eyes, and feeling how he felt, has highlighted to me how miserable he was during that time, so it makes me even more grateful to have come into his life and brightened it up for him. The flashback starts to fade away, like the projection screen does in a movie theatre when the picture is over, but as I start to waken I notice a severe and agonising thumping feeling in my head. It feels like it is about to explode, which concerns me greatly, because I haven't felt like this after a flashback before. This one however was an extremely long one, so maybe it is because of all the information being thrust into my mind which is giving me such a severe headache. It is an extreme effort to open my eyes from the pain caused by my headache. The other thing which makes the task so difficult is that the world is far too bright, causing me to instinctively close them again. Despite the headache I start to feel more awake, but still can't keep my eyes open for very long, let alone get them to focus. I get sick of not being able to see what is going on around me, so I force my eyes open, and try to get them to focus, but no matter how hard I try it doesn't seem to work. The world is still blurry, and I'm seeing everything in double. I can vaguely work out the outline of people surrounding me, but have no idea where I am or what has happened. Something seems to be trickling from my nose down to my lips, so as a reflex action I wipe my nose with the back of my hand and then try to examine the result. I can't see clearly what is coming from my nose, but I can tell that the back of my hand now has a red smear over it. I suddenly get a taste of iron, as the liquid trickles onto my lips and into my mouth. Instantly I work out that the mystery substance is blood, because I have had my fair share of bloody noses thanks to my father and his big hands. It is not a taste I like, because it brings back all the bad memories of the beatings I used to receive at the hands of my father, so I spit it out. My head is starting to feel like it is swimming, making me feel nauseous, and along with the other symptoms I seem to be displaying, I am starting to become extremely worried about what is going on. The blurred double vision, severe throbbing headache, nose bleed plus disorientation which is causing my head to swim, what the hell could it all mean? I have had similar symptoms before, usually after one of dad's severe beatings, but I know I haven't been beaten up, so none of it makes sense. The other thing I have only just noticed is the world seems to be completely silent; I can't hear any noise at all, which is scaring the shit out of me. Have I suddenly become deaf? God I hope not, because I will miss hearing my boyfriend's sexy French accent. That is the other odd thing. I can't feel Pierre's presence comforting me. It is like he isn't there, or maybe all the symptoms I am displaying are cancelling out any positive benefits I get from him. Surely not, because he was in a much worse state than I am when he was in hospital, yet he could still sense my presence. I am starting to wonder if something has gone majorly wrong, but how and what had we been up to for that to happen? Nothing makes any sense, and the more I try to think about it the more my head hurts. I am in constant battles with my body to try and focus my eyes, prevent myself throwing up and to stop myself from dozing off, but I feel like I'm losing all of them. My stomach is churning worse the more my head hurts, and the more tired I get the more my head swims making the feeling of nausea even worse. My eyelids are feeling so much like concrete blocks now I'm struggling to keep them open any longer, and I can feel myself drifting off to sleep. I feel someone suddenly shaking my shoulder, as they make a desperate attempt to prevent me sleeping, but the result is me losing control of my gut. Throwing up has to be the most horrible sensation there is, let alone the awful aftertaste it leaves in your mouth. I don't know how many times I threw up, or even where it went. I am still unable to focus my eyesight and seeing things in double is starting to get annoying, but as hard as I try I can't fix the problem, which frustrates me more. Once my stomach has settled down I am overcome by fatigue, and despite anyone's best efforts to keep me awake they fail miserably. My eyes are far too heavy to keep opening them up every time I get shaken, so keep them closed after a while. It still takes a long time before my head shuts down and I sleep, because my mind is swimming so bad I keep getting the nauseous feeling coming back, but I don't throw up any more. The severe throbbing headache is the main reason it takes so long to nod off properly, because it is too hard to ignore, but eventually I become that exhausted that even my headache can no longer keep me awake. The pounding in my head prevents me from getting long sleeps, but nothing seems to change each time I awaken. My eyes still refuse to focus, so even if the scenery around me is changing I don't notice. I can't even tell whether I'm sitting or lying down, which isn't helped by the disorientated swimming feelings in my head. Blood seems to still be pouring out of my nose and I try desperately not to allow any of it in my mouth, but the worst thing is the nausea which doesn't seem to want to settle down, no matter how many times I chuck. I seem to be awake for about ten minutes at a time before I fall back to sleep for about half an hour. Every time someone is trying desperately to prevent me from falling back asleep, but they fail miserably each time. It isn't because I'm trying to fall asleep again, no, I know something is not right, so I know I have to try to stay awake. Despite my knowledge and best intentions, sleep always wins. I fight my hardest, which as anyone who knows me will tell you I am no push over. I am stubborn and I know how to fight, because in some way shape of form I have been doing it most of my life, but this is one fight I am no match for. I'm feeling alone all the time while I try to fight whatever is wrong with me, despite knowing that there are three to four people crowding around me. Due to having double vision I can't tell exactly how many people are there, so I'm guessing at the number, but I feel like someone is missing. Someone important to me, whom I desperately need to help me through this. Since the flashback I haven't felt his warm comforting love, in fact I haven't felt his presence at all. The more time that passes the more concerned I become, because it is unlike Pierre to leave me wallowing in so much pain and discomfort, unless something has happened to him too. If we were together then I know we would both be fine given enough time, but for some reason we aren't with each other, so whatever one of us is going through the other will too. That thought makes me wonder about which symptoms are mine and which are his, but then again I can't sense him at all, so they may all be mine. All this thinking while I am awake quickly takes its toll, making my headache worse and my stomach churn more. The biggest impact it has on my current state of health is that it upset me, causing my mental state to become unstable, which is not a good thing at the best of times, but without Pierre is generally worse. Everything going on in me is getting to the unbearable stage, and the fight I'm waging against all my symptoms is quickly becoming a lost cause. I am starting to lose the massive battle in a big way, because I can slowly feel my mind fading away as I lose consciousness. "Seriously I think we need to get them to the doctors, or maybe the hospital," I hear a voice yelling frantically, which I am glad about because it means my hearing has come back. "How the hell could you allow this to happen? I allow you to take them sailing and you bring them back like this! I'm glad you don't take kids on lessons if this is the result," another voice snaps back. I can tell straight away that I have started to awaken in the middle of some argument, but I'm unable to open my eyes to see who it is that is arguing. "It was a bloody accident, because I never got warned about the two older boys spacing out the way they did, so I panicked and let go of the boom before it was properly secured," the first voice yells back. I am slowly starting to get a picture about what has happened, but I am still confused because surely the boom can't have hit Pierre and me without taking out Callum and Manuel as well. "Stop it, stop it! It was no-one's fault so can you stop arguing about it?" another voice yells, but this one sounds like it is on the verge of breaking down. The voice is definitely one of a young boy, so this one I recognise straight away. It is Callum's and I am a bit surprised to hear him trying to break up an argument, because he normally shies away from any conflict. I can tell he is still practising things that Alice has taught him, so he can get over the emotional abuse dad inflicted on him. After Callum's outburst an eerie silence fills the room, because whoever the two bickering adults were realise he is right and it was no-one's fault. The silence helps me to focus back on myself, and I realise my headache has gone along with my queasy gut. It takes a while to see whether my eyes have cleared up as well, because I am finding it exceedingly hard to open them. My energy levels are still at rock bottom, which is leaving me feeling exceptionally tired still; as a result my eyelids don't want to open. One thing I have started to notice as I try to open my eyes is a painful throbbing feeling coming from my nose. I reach up and feel around it, but end up pulling my hand away rapidly because of the intense pain which has shot through my head from the contact. I know from previous experience that I have somehow broken my nose again, which explains the constant bleeding I had noticed earlier on. Gradually my eyes open and slowly focus; much to my relief they focus properly and I no longer have double vision, but as I look down my still naked body I see it has a river of red running down the middle of it from where the blood from my bleeding nose has dripped. "Joshy, you're awake again!" Callum shrieks excitedly, after seeing my eyes open. Hearing his shrill high pitched voice is amazing, because I had worried about being deaf, and there is not much that sounds as beautiful as his voice when he is in an excited mood. It sounds a hundred times better than the argument I awoke to. "Yes, I'm awake and feeling a lot better. What the hell happened?" I ask in a soft croaky voice. "So glad you can talk this time, because all you could do before was drivel a whole lot of nonsense. Oh you want to know what happened...? Um... Pierre suddenly freaked out and started screaming; as a result he dropped François back in the water and caused Manuel's grandpa to panic..." he replies. "Oh thank god you're awake again and looking a lot better," Manuel's grandpa interrupts, after hearing Callum talking to me and hearing me respond. After having had everyone else in the room also come to check on me, I get told the rest of the story. I had also screamed at the same time Pierre had, which is why Manuel's grandpa had panicked so much, because he thought something exceedingly bad must have happened. In his panic he forgot to secure the boom and raced over to Pierre, because that's where he figured the trouble was happening. Seeing François back in the water and Pierre in a trance had the man confused and he didn't notice the sudden gust of wind that came up. The first any of them realised Manuel's grandpa's mistake was when they heard a sickening thud from the boom swinging into me at a good rate of knots, which knocked me over causing me to smack my head on the guard rail on the way down. The guard rail is what broke my nose and gave me all the rest of the symptoms, which I learn is because I had become concussed, well at least that's what they think happened. I am going to have to go to the doctors to get checked out, but they don't seem to be too concerned about it any more because I seem to be fine. "What about Pierre, where is he and what happened to him?" I ask them frantically, after they finish explaining what had happened to me. "Pierre is fine and has been for a while. He is asleep in bed, but he gave us as big a fright as you did. He was showing all the same symptoms that you seemed to have, but they all suddenly cleared up not long before we got back," Manuel's grandpa explains. I can see that he hasn't had everything explained to him yet about us, because he obviously doesn't know about Pierre's and my empathic connection. If he did, then he would know why Pierre got sick the way he did, and also why he got better. I know why, but still can't believe it. "Can you take me in to him, because I need to sleep as well, I'm completely shattered?" I ask, well more state, because I won't take no for an answer. I just presume they will do as I want them to. "We should take you to the doc..." Manuel's grandpa starts to say. "Don't worry about it, I know he will be fine. He has gone through much worse before and Pierre will help fix him anyway!" mum interrupts, surprising the hell out of me, because I didn't expect this from her. Strange, I should be getting used to the unexpected from her, because it is happening a lot more regularly now. I want to give mum a hug for backing me up, but as hard as I try my body won't co-operate with me, so I can't sit up. I'm feeling rather frustrated about that, but the problem is solved when mum and Sarah decide that they will be the ones to help me through to the bedroom, which enables me to give mum a hug. She is caught by surprise this time, because even with our grudges settled, I still have hardly hugged her in ages, so she is not used to it. I give her a tight loving hug, well, it feels tight but my arms are so dead that I don't think my hug is tight at all. It doesn't bother mum though, as she hugs me back. We hug for a while, before she realises just how weak I am, so decides it is time to get me to bed. I am disappointed when she stops hugging me, because without Pierre it is the most loved I have felt in a while, but then again I know I'm about to see him again, so I don't really know what I was disappointed about. Mum wraps one of my arms around her shoulder and Sarah does the same with the other, before they hoist me up to a standing position. It is now I see I had been lying on one of the couches in the lounge while they argued about what was the best thing to do about me, but I am glad to see I have no blood on it because I would have felt that to be disrespectful, despite not having any control over it. Everyone says their goodnight, and Callum and Manuel both give me a huge hug, before mum and Sarah carry me out to the bedroom Pierre is sleeping in. Upon entering the room and seeing my beautiful angel lying naked on the bed, I'm a little concerned because he literally looks dead to the world. If he is breathing it is not noticeable and he is lying completely still, but I'm sure he is fine, and can't wait to get into bed with him. Mum and Sarah carry me to the bed and lie me down beside my lover, and almost instantly he seems to come to life, as he rolls over and wraps an arm around me. It feels so wonderful and makes me feel complete again, so I wrap an arm around him. Mum and Sarah do a quick job of cleaning the blood off me, before I drifted off into slumberland with my lover. ************ Comments are always welcome at (pennywise3636@gmail.com). Please keep all comments clean. If possible please kick in a few bucks at the Nifty Website, to keep it up and running. The site puts in a lot of effort and work so that we all have a place to come and contribute or read some fine stories.