Date: Sun, 16 Mar 2014 11:06:39 +1300
From: bob charles <pennywise3636@gmail.com>
Subject: Washed Up (Gay / Young friends) chapter 30

Washed Up.

Disclaimer:

Warning: this story contains sexual content, contact between young boys,
and other themes that may offend.  If the subject matter offends you, is
not to your tastes, or if you are under legal age for your area, then find
something else to read. In the following story all names and events are
completely fictional.  Although I may mention a specific location, place,
or person any resemblance to said people, location, or places is completely
unintentional.

Chapter 30:

"Give the room to Sarah, because she is a teen so probably wants and needs
the privacy more than anyone. In any case if you want to give Bastian and
Xavier their own room then all it will require is Jean sleeping with you"
he replies, stating the obvious, because without thinking about it mum had
booked two extra rooms. She had got so used to booking four rooms that she
did so without thinking, and then booked the extra room on top. This of
course incidentally made things a lot easier, but she is feeling a bit
stupid for not having worked it out.

Manuel's grandpa then disappears into the room and closes the door, while
the rest of us get ourselves organised and go into our rooms. It is getting
pretty late so we dump our bags, and strip off our clothes. We will worry
about things like a shower tomorrow, so we open our bags and rummage
through them till we find our toiletries bags, which we take through to the
bathroom and brush our teeth. We quickly do our business in the toilet
before wandering back through to the bedroom and climbing into bed. We
snuggle close together like usual and follow that up with a tender loving
kiss, before drifting off to the pleasant world of sleep.

************

I am awoken early the next morning with a start, after someone bangs loudly
on our door. The knocking is so loud that I almost jump out of my skin, but
it works in waking me up quickly. Pierre also jumps at the noise, which
separates him from our cuddle, but it doesn't matter because we know mum
wants us up early so we couldn't continue to snuggle anyway. I'm a little
disappointed at having to get up so early, because I had been hoping to
have a little fun this morning and that isn't going to happen now. I shake
my head free from my disappointment and climb out of bed. As I wander to
the door I pick up the pants I had discarded last night and pull them on,
since I figure I better have something on when I see who is there. I do up
the button at the top in order to prevent them from falling down, but don't
bother doing up the fly since they will be coming off again shortly. All I
do is ensure I am fully tucked away before opening the door to see what is
happening.

"Good morning; just thought I would tell you that I want to leave within
the hour because we have a couple of things I want to do today. Don't worry
because I'm sure you will love one of the ideas planned. I thought I would
wake you up a little earlier in case you wanted to have a bath or something
before we left, since you were in bed early last night I presumed you
didn't wash yourselves, unlike the others," mum says warmly, but what seems
strange is she also gives me a little wink as she says the last part. I
don't know but I think she may be thinking that we wanted to do more than
simply wash ourselves, and she is letting me know we have time to do so. It
is unlike her, but then again she did go out of her way this time to ensure
we got a room to ourselves, because it has been a little while since we
have had privacy. In fact we haven't had time to ourselves in about four
days, which is the longest we haven't had it in a long time.

"Ok mum, thanks for the early wake up, well, I think. We will be ready
within the hour for you, but can you at least give us a hint about what we
are going to be doing?" I ask, hoping she may let us in on a little part of
her secret plans, but I'm not holding my breath in expectation.

"Hmmm... well, let's just say that by the end of the day we will be in
Taupo Bay, but I plan on taking a detour or two on the way there," she
replies, ensuring she chooses her words wisely to keep it as much of a
mystery as possible. She does well because I have no idea what her plans
may be, as all I know is it is only about another three hour drive from
here to Taupo Bay, and I can't think of any really good detours on the
way. I know there are a few beautiful spots along the way north, but none
of them are that far off the main road to chew up most of the day, so I'm
stumped.

"Ok, I still have no idea, but I trust you have a great day planned out. We
will get ready now so we can get the show on the road," I say, before she
disappears towards her bedroom, allowing me to close the door and wander
back towards the bed to get Pierre up.

He has been gazing at me lovingly the whole time I have been up, but I can
tell that something is going through his mind. I can't work out what,
because when he wants to he can stop me from working out what is on his
mind. It could be he has the same ideas as I do, but then again he may be
contemplating something totally different. I can't tell. Before reaching
the bed to pull him out, I decide to get the bath running so he doesn't
have to wait long for it, so I do a quick detour to the bathroom and turn
on the taps. I'm pleased to see the generous water pressure filling the tub
at a great rate of knots, meaning we won't have to wait long before the
bath fills. I dip my hand in the water to check the temperature, and being
happy with it I leave the bath to fill itself and head back to the bedroom
to get Pierre.

He is still lying under the covers, relaxing and waiting eagerly for me to
return. He is adorable, a beautiful little angel the way he is lying there,
making it hard for me to disturb him. I want to get back into bed and
cuddle up with him again, but if I do that then we will never get cleaned
up and ready to go in time. The bath would also overflow and make a huge
mess, so I know I have to get him out sooner rather than later. I stroll to
his side of the bed and take hold of his hands, pulling him up out of bed
and into my waiting arms. I give him a hug and plant a tender loving kiss
on his lips, but I'm a little surprised that he isn't hugging me back. His
hands seem to be wandering down my body instead, making me think he has
other things on his mind, but I know with the bath filling that this isn't
a good time. I try to stop his meandering hands, but he doesn't let me. It
isn't until I feel him fumbling to undo the button on my pants, which
promptly fall down, that I realise what his goal was.

Somehow I had completely forgotten I had put on some pants to answer the
door, so I am glad he had the forethought to ensure they were removed
before I tried to get into the bath with them still on. That could have
been a little embarrassing, because I think I would have done it too. Once
my pants are around my ankles, Pierre gives me a kiss and cuddle back,
before bending down to remove them from me. Once he has removed my pants,
we wander through to the bathroom holding hands. I love the way we do this
because it feels so right in so many ways, and I know things will get even
better when we cuddle up together in the bath. Upon reaching the bathroom I
shut off the taps, as the bath has filled up more than I had been hoping
for. It isn't high enough to run any risk of overflowing when we get in,
but it is higher than I originally intended to fill it.

Pierre hops into the tub, beating me to it as I was hoping to get in there
first. It doesn't matter too much because I'm sure I can rearrange us, so
he is where I want him. I follow him in, but before I get a chance to sit
down at the other end, he pulls me gently down so that I'm sitting between
his legs. This isn't what I planned at all, because I wanted him in front
of me. He wraps his arms around me, hugging me, but mainly he is ensuring I
stay put. Once he feels me stop resisting he eases up and starts caressing
my chest. He knows I had been planning something, but he has decided that
what he wants to do is far more important, so has taken control of the
situation. The thing that gets me is how easily he did it, because normally
when I have something planned for him, there is no way I will back down. I
think it is because of the talk I had with Manuel's grandpa, and I have
come to realise that I need to let him have his way too.

"Josh... um... is it alright if I have a talk with you?" he asks
nervously. I'm not sure what he is worried about because I'm sure he
doesn't have anything too unsettling to bring up.

"Yeah, sure, what is it love?" I ask, while trying to ease his fears at the
same time. It is strange that we haven't started to use pet names for each
other, yet when I did just then it felt so right.

"I want you to be honest with me and tell me how you feel about
yesterday. I mean about the news you got about your dad, because I want to
know that you are finished with it. If there is anything you need to get
off your chest then I want you to do so now, because I want to help you get
closure on this. The most important thing is I want you to be able to close
this part of your book, so it doesn't continue to haunt you in the future,"
he tells me.

I let out a loud sigh because this is not what I had expected, but I know
he is right and I need to talk openly about my thoughts. This is what
Manuel's grandpa had stressed to me, that I need to allow Pierre to help
me, like I help him. I open up to him, telling him how I felt more betrayed
that dad could keep such an important secret from his own family, than I
did about what he had done to me. The more I continue the more I start to
rant and rave about what I had been told, because I'm totally furious with
not only dad, but society as well. Most people don't realise it, but their
prejudices are one of the main reasons dad did what he did. Me and my
family were the ones to suffer, but I know we aren't alone in that. There
are likely to be lots of other people who are suffering immensely because
someone is too ashamed of what they are, so either hide big secrets or
don't get the help they need. My anger peaks, and then comes crashing down,
being replaced by sadness.

Pierre sits there and listens intently to my ranting and raving, making no
attempt in calming me down. He knows I need to get it off my chest, and
that is what I am doing. The only time he reacts is when I come crashing
down and start crying. He wraps me up in a tender loving hug, strokes my
forehead, but lets me continue at the same time. He knows why I am crying,
because he knows I lost my father, but also realises that I'm starting to
come to grips with everything I have been through. I'm actually starting to
get confused, because as much as I want to continue forgiving dad, I'm
finding it almost impossible. He lied to me, well, my family, and hid a big
important secret. That secret caused him to do things he normally wouldn't
do, but I also want to close the book on this and know I can only do that
by forgiving him. I don't know what to do, and it is tearing me apart. What
is worse is knowing I'm doubting my own feelings, because I had already
forgiven him, so why take it all back now?

Somehow Pierre knows exactly what to say to me, even though he hasn't been
through anything like what I have, knowing his parents haven't betrayed his
trust in any way. He knows it is difficult for me, so suggests that I try
to accept things before I go any further. He doesn't expect me to forgive
dad, no matter how much I think I should, because dad did something which
is unforgivable. The question in my mind is that if I don't forgive him
then how will I ever get any closure? I'm not sure that there is any other
way around it but to eventually forgive him, although Pierre seems to think
acceptance will close the chapter as well as what forgiving him would do,
but I don't quite understand how. I mean I have already accepted he fucked
up big time, so what else is there left to accept? He reminds me what it is
by pointing out I was angry with the way he never sought help with his
problem, along with hiding it from me.

I sigh, because I know he is right, and I'm struggling to accept that side
of it. We talk for a wee while, as Pierre tries his best to help me as much
as he can. In the end he knows it is all going to be up to me, but he
assists as much as possible anyway, just like I did when I helped him with
something. Not knowing what to do I turn around and ask him what he would
do in my situation. His answer is a lot simpler than I imagined it would
be, because all he says is that he would listen to the advice I gave him,
and let the rest work itself out. He says that just from being with me his
problems have solved themselves without having to think about it, which
sounds a bit odd until I realise that there is no way he could be lying
about this. His grief surrounding the deaths of his parents seemed to
vanish quicker than it should, but to the benefit, not detriment of him. He
hasn't supressed it, just been able to accept it and move on quickly, all
because I was with him through it so he didn't have to solely focus on
it. The longer I stayed with him during those times the more the problem
seemed to work itself out, without any conscious effort on his behalf. I
think that is the best piece of advice he gave me, and it's something I
struggle with at the best of times, but now I see there is a huge point to
it. I need to learn to shut my mind off, and let it heal itself. Not
overthink things, because that never seems to get me anywhere.

"Come on you two, we are going to leave shortly," mum yells through the
door, after pounding on it to get our attention.

"Shit, have we been in here that long?" I say out loud, although only meant
to think it. Pierre doesn't answer because he knows it is a rhetorical
question. I think he knows I only meant to think it too.

I can't believe we whittled away the good part of an hour by sitting in
here talking, but by seeing how wrinkled the underside of my hands and
fingers are I know we have been in here a long time. I'm glad we had our
discussion, but I wish I had more time so I could do what I wanted to. Oh
well, it will have to wait for some other time now. I stand up to allow
Pierre to do the same, which he does with no hesitation, pulling the plug
as he gets up. We quickly dry ourselves, before rummaging through our bags
until we find the clothes we want to wear, and get dressed in as short a
time as humanly possible. I would say we got out of the bath and dressed in
about five minutes, which would have to be record time for us. All that we
have left is to repack our bags and leave, which we do swiftly. Our timing
is spot on, because everyone seems to be coming out of their rooms at the
same time, so there is no need to hang around and wait for anyone. Before
we know it we are all piled into the van and on the road again.

We head north, through Whangarei, as far as the closest bakery. Mum jumps
out, and is gone for a couple of minutes, before returning to the van with
a big bag full of stuff. She starts driving again, leaving Manuel's dad to
dish out the contents, which he does without getting told. It is a simple
breakfast, filled rolls, but it fills the gap and charges us up for the day
ahead. We follow State Highway One north for a while, before mum turns off
the main road in a small nondescript town about half an hour out of the
city. I didn't get to see the road sign, since I'm sitting on the wrong
side of the van, so I have no idea where this road goes to, let alone if I
have ever been on it before.

During the first stage of the trip I have been cuddling Pierre, watching
the world go by, and not concentrating on anything other than the outside
world. The weather is overcast, but the cumulus clouds in the sky are
gradually breaking up and allowing more sun to shine through. The clouds
are light in colour which is good, because it lessens the likelihood of
sporadic showers, but the wind has got up again. That too is supposed to
die away during the day, but in the meantime it means it will be a bit
colder out. I slowly start to notice my mood improving during the trip, and
I realise Pierre was right. Without noticing, my mind is fixing itself, and
learning to accept all the latest information about dad. Pierre is helping
me come to terms with things, and he isn't doing anything. I now know how I
have helped him, yet don't understand it at the same time; seems to be that
our empathic connection is what does the healing, not so much the advice
given.

I'm not too worried about trying to work out how it all works, because all
that matters is it does. Any issues I had surrounding dad have dissolved
into nothing, and I feel content about it. I suppose this time around I
have done the wise thing, because I haven't forgiven him for what he has
done, but have found a way to accept his mistakes as mistakes, in order to
continue with life, not allowing it to hold me back. I feel I can forget
about it, effectively wipe it from my mind, and not feel at all bad for
it. That is exactly what I do, as I start to ignore my thoughts and
concentrate on the scenery revealing itself around us. The bush-clad hills
suddenly give way and expose the seemingly endless glistening waters of the
Pacific Ocean. Well, I presume it is the Pacific, because I'm sure we
headed east, not west which would have taken us to the Tasman Sea.

Each time we round a bend the scene reveals itself more and more. We are
heading down the hills towards a stunning looking bay, with beautiful
golden sands, flanked by rocky headlands that have Pohutukawa trees jutting
out from them in all sorts of weird and wonderful directions. The
Pohutukawa is commonly known here as the New Zealand Christmas Tree,
because of the glorious red flowers which come out in time for the festive
season. They are weird trees, because they seem to grow anywhere in coastal
regions, and it isn't uncommon to see them growing out of the side of a
cliff. Just like a lot of native trees here, they are relatively slow
growing, but live for thousands of years. The whole image in front of us is
a true quintessential kiwi beach scene, but even better than most, because
even though there is a town beside the bay it is small and full of
old-school bachs (holiday homes).It retains the long lost charm of a
typical kiwi holiday town, which has been replaced in a lot of regions in
the country with more jazzed up and modern looking houses which have
destroyed the character of a lot of towns.

Mum is cruising at best as we drive down the hill and through the small
town on the beach. She obviously isn't in a rush, just allowing our guests
to enjoy the scenery along the route. I haven't worked out where we are,
because this is all new to me as well, meaning I enjoy the scenic drive as
much as anyone. The road continues to wind its way along the coast, passing
a few more picturesque beaches, while cutting through some glorious native
forest as well. It is an ideal setting here, making me wonder why it isn't
more developed, as it would make a great place to come on summer
holidays. The metalled road may be a large reason for that, along with it
being narrow and windy, although other parts of the country used to be like
that and it didn't put people off, so who knows? Mum pulls off onto the
shoulder of the road every so often, allowing the couple of cars which have
gathered behind us, to be able to pass. It is common courtesy which isn't
seen enough in New Zealand nowadays, but due to the nature of the roads it
can be impossible for faster travellers to pass, so it is the decent thing
to do, and avoids any likelihood of them making some stupid decision and
overtake in a dangerous place.

Gradually the road leaves the coast and cuts inland, before we find
ourselves in a bay which looks like it is in a harbour due to the land I
can see directly opposite. There is something strangely familiar about this
place, making me think I have been here before, but I don't recognise
anything. It is the colour of the water, along with the backdrop which
gives me a strong sense of déjà vu, so my curiosity is now starting
to get the better of me. I need to know why I feel like I have been here
before, and yet I'm sure as hell that I haven't. Well at least this
particular place I haven't been to before. The road leaves the coast yet
again, and heads inland, but not for as long as before. We get back to the
coast a short time later to much the same scene as before, except this time
there is a ferry terminal at the end of the road. Docked at the terminal is
a car ferry, which is currently loading the gathered cars at this end of
its route. We get there right on time to be able to pay and drive straight
on. Not long after we park the car on the deck, the ferry closes up and
starts its journey.

The ferry ride is very short – ten minutes at most – making me wonder
what on earth the point of it is. I mean, surely they could have put in a
road instead of having to use a ferry. I can understand the authorities not
wanting to build a bridge, because it is very expensive, but surely a road
around the inlet, or harbour, or whatever it is would be easier. It might
be a kid's logic, but I can't see the point of a ferry if the trip is only
ten minutes long. We are off the boat and back on the road before I know
it, but I still haven't worked out where we are. I still have a strong
sense of déjà vu, and the more we travel around the region the
stronger it becomes. We drive past a green road sign which tells me the
town we are now entering, and it all suddenly becomes clear. A huge smile
comes across my face now that I know where we are, as I have fond memories
of the place and I'm hoping mum has brought us here for a reason. I'm
hoping we are going out on a boat ride, which is the thing I enjoyed about
Paihia the most last time we were here.

Mum drives through town until she sees the ferry terminal, where she finds
a park as close to it as she can. The place is extremely quiet, but given
we are in the middle of winter, I'm not surprised. Paihia, and the Bay of
Islands are more of a summer holiday destination than a winter one. The
nasty weather that ripped through the upper North Island a couple of days
ago hasn't helped, as the tourists have decided to head south away from the
storm, instead of coming north. Once the van is parked and the engine shut
down, we pile out and stretch. We have been in the van for a while, so it
is a great feeling being able to stand and stretch properly again.

Even though we are in the middle of winter it is relatively warm outside. I
would say it is somewhere in the mid to high teens, which is warm for
anywhere in the country this time of year. There is more blue sky than
clouds now, so the sun is pouring down. That along with the very light
breeze is making outside conditions pleasant. When we are satisfied that we
have freed our bodies of their stiffness, we follow mum into the ferry
terminal. The place is dead, with most of the booking desks closed. In fact
the only desk that is open, is the one for the passenger ferry across to
Russell. The one we want has someone behind the desk, but I have a gut
feeling that no boats are running from this one either. My heart sinks at
the realisation that we aren't likely to get another ride out to the hole
in the rock, but it doesn't deter mum who looks determined to go through
with her plan.

"Hello, I was wondering if there is any chance of a ride?"

"I'm sorry, but it is very rough out at Cape Brett and the conditions
aren't supposed to ease until later today," the lady behind the desk
replies. I can see mum not giving in despite the answer, as she tries to
come up with an argument where she knows she will win.

"Please can you at least consider a special trip? I will sign any waiver
you want, so that the company isn't liable if one of us gets hurt..."

"I'm sorry lady, but it isn't my call. The captain doesn't want to risk it,
and if you look around, neither do any other captains..." the lady at the
desk replies.

"Hello, it's been a long time, and it's great to see you back again. I see
you have a bigger party this time round... Susan, leave them with me
because I know them, and I'll sort them out for you... Come with me, and
introduce me to the others," the captain we had been with last time we were
on the trip says. He has just entered the building, and as soon as he saw
us his eyes lit up. Pierre's and mine did too, because we were hoping he
remembered us and would make special arrangements. It looks good so far,
and the fact he remembers us means we must have made a good impact on the
man the last time.

The captain leads us into an office, beside where the reception desk is
located, closes the door and offers the adults a seat. This time Sarah
isn't included because there aren't enough seats to go around, so she has
to remain standing like the rest of us kids. Since this is the first time
mum has met the captain I take it upon myself to introduce everyone, which
inevitably leads to quite a bit of explaining about how we came to be in
France and met all the wonderful people we are surrounded by. I feel rather
awkward trying to explain things, because I'm hesitant to tell him that
Pierre and I are gay and in a relationship. I know cares about us because
of what he did for us the first time we met him, but I'm still scared he
may not like the fact we are gay. I don't know him well enough to know how
he will react, so I am very reluctant to tell him.

Withholding that piece of vital information makes it a lot harder to
explain why we had to go to France to get Pierre, because I can't think of
any believable excuse about why the boy would mean so much to us that we
would go out of our way for him. This is when mum steps in and does what I
should have done in the first place. She tells him straight up about Pierre
and my relationship. His reaction to the news is not what I expected,
although I have no idea how I thought he would react, but it wasn't the way
he did. It is almost like a light bulb got turned on in his head, and that
is followed with a big smile towards Pierre and me. It turns out he had
suspected it when he first met us, because he thought we looked
exceptionally close for kids of our age. He said we were closer than all
other kids of our age group looked; even those who were really great
friends never seemed to look as close to each other as we did.

With that part done it makes it a lot easier to tell him the rest, although
for safety reasons we didn't tell him everything. We kept the real reason
for becoming such good friends with Manuel from him, along with the true
reason we ended up in hospital. We told him that Pierre had an accident and
took a bad knock to the head, and that I had a mental breakdown as a
result. We explained the mental breakdown by filling him in on the basics
of our empathic connection, so it seemed feasible that Pierre getting badly
hurt would trigger that type of reaction from me. The captain listened to
our story intently, obviously intrigued by what he was hearing. For some
reason he had felt close to Pierre, Callum and me the first time we met
him, and I have to say that we felt the same way towards him too. That is
the main reason I wanted to come back here, and somehow I think mum read my
mind.

It isn't only the captain who is impressed with what we have been through,
because Xavier is also staring at us in disbelief. I had totally forgotten
that we haven't yet had the time to tell him what we had been through, so
the tale of our escapades in France is new to him as well. Pierre and I
feel bad about the way he found out, because we know we should have told
him first hand. He never should have heard it because we were telling the
story to someone else. I know I have told him about the way dad treated me,
although even that was only a brief and blunt account of what happened. I
realise that we need to find some time to tell him our story properly,
because he should hear it straight from us, and not any other way. We
apologise, letting him know that when we get a chance we will tell him
everything, because we really do feel bad for not having told him. He isn't
too worried, but is looking forward to hearing everything anyway, because
as he says, it sounds like we have had quite an adventure.

Once we have finished apologising to Xavier the captain tells us how much
he was hoping we would come back, but sort of wishes we had picked a better
day. He tells us that even though the bay between Paihia and Russell is
calm with little chop, the outer part of the bay is pretty rough and it is
even rougher at Cape Brett. The mention of Cape Brett sends a chill down my
spine, which I didn't expect because I thought that Pierre and I should
have got over the death of his father, but it seems like there is still a
little way to go. The captain tells us that he is happy to take us out to
the hole in the rock, but it will only be a scenic trip because it is too
rough for him to give us the full experience. I think it is for the best as
well, because I'm not sure how Manuel's grandparents would handle the trip
if the captain threw the boat around, pulling off all the tricks he can. I
think it might be too intense for them, so a nice scenic trip would likely
suit them better.

Mum decides to take the offer, although disappointed at not being able to
experience the thrill and excitement we had the first time round. Manuel's
grandparents also look disappointed, although they don't know what the ride
is usually like, so I don't think they would be too upset if they
did. Unsurprisingly Callum looks gutted, and Manuel does too because he has
had what to expect explained to him by my younger brother. He must have
explained it well, because Manuel seems to know exactly what he is missing
out on, but we can't control the weather so will have to make do with what
we get. I am secretly hoping that the conditions in the outer bay ease by
the time we get out there, so the captain can let loose. The only thing
which still concerns me is the elders, but I'm sure the captain can find a
happy medium between too extreme and too calm, so everyone is happy.

The captain says to allow him half an hour to get the boat prepared,
because he hadn't been anticipating going out at all today so hasn't got
anything ready. The break is good because it allows us time to get
something for lunch before venturing out on the ocean. Food may not be the
best thing for a rough sailing, but we are all too hungry to care about
that, so we leave the office and terminal, cross the road and enter the
closest bakery. By the time we have all got what we want, and eaten it, it
is time to head back to catch the boat. Due to the fact we knew we were
about to embark on a boat ride, no-one got anything too substantial for
lunch. We didn't want to feel bloated, but most importantly we didn't want
to run the risk of losing what we have just eaten, especially if it gets
bumpy out on the water.

By the time we get back the captain has all the wet weather gear laid out
in preparation for us. Without the need to get told, we all pull the gear
on as quickly as we can. Excitement about the trip has gripped everyone,
and the eagerness to get on the water ensures everyone dresses
quickly. After only a couple of minutes we are all on board the boat and
harnessing ourselves in. The captain has to do all the checks himself,
since he has given most of his staff the day off. He makes his way around
everyone and checks the tightness of our belts, along with showing us how
the quick-release device works in case of an emergency. Even though we are
only supposed to be going on a gentle cruise the captain still ensures we
are all tightly buckled in, which makes me wonder if there is a chance we
might get more out of the trip than first thought. I try not to get my
hopes up at the thought, but it is impossible as my imagination takes
control. I soon start to feel excited at the expectations I have now put on
the ride, and I know I'm not the only one.

We are chatting mindlessly to each other, as the excitement we are feeling
bubbles to the surface and takes control of us. We are looking forward to
the trip so much that it is almost impossible to keep us still. Even the
adults seem to be excited about the trip, which I'm glad about. The feeling
of anticipation increases tenfold when I feel the boat shudder as the
engines kick into life. The engines sound exactly as I remember, and scream
out the horsepower in them through a deep throaty growl. With no crew on
board the captain has to do everything, but it doesn't take him long, so we
are drifting slowly from the dock within minutes. I suddenly feel nervous
now we are on our way, because of the unexpected reaction I had earlier to
hearing the name Cape Brett, which is playing in the back of my mind. I'm a
little worried about how Pierre is going to cope, but at this stage he
seems surprisingly well, which is not what I was expecting. I had expected
to see some nerves in him, but he is cool, calm and collected, so I'm
wondering why I had the reaction earlier.

"Are you alright, I mean going out to Cape Brett again? It's just I got
this strange chill down my spine when the name was mentioned," I ask, not
expecting the reaction I get in reply. He smirks the cheekiest smile I've
seen from him, before he chuckles to himself, leaving me completely
confused.

"Um... well... dad decided to be cheeky and run his hand down your back
when it was mentioned, so that's what you felt," he replies eventually,
deciding he should end my confusion. It takes a moment for me to understand
what he is talking about, but I finally realise that his parents have come
along for the trip with us, ensuring they are with us so they can try to
protect us if anything were to happen. It is a little creepy thinking about
it. I mean having two ghosts following you around all the time doesn't seem
right, but I'm sure I will get used to it, and it isn't like they are
making themselves known. Well, most of the time anyway.

I give Pierre an awkward kind of smile, as I am feeling a little
uncomfortable at the thought. Normally I would question whether the person
was telling the truth, or pulling my leg, but I know he wouldn't do that to
me. Not about something like this anyway. He gives me a hug, as well as he
can given our restraints, trying to ease my discomfort. His hug as per
usual, works wonders and feels awesome, but then again I didn't need much
comforting. What I need is to get my head around it, and the hug helps
heaps. Pretty soon I have forgotten all about it and am enjoying the ride,
as well as the hug I'm still embraced in.

The boat is motoring along nicely, as we venture further out into the
bay. The sea surface has started to get choppy and unsettled, but so far it
isn't as bad as I expected. The closer to the open ocean we get, the
rougher the sea becomes, but it isn't too horrible. If you are weak in the
stomach and suffer from motion sickness, then it would be absolutely awful
being out here, otherwise it isn't too bad. The only issue I can think of
to do with how much the captain throws the boat around, would be the
stability of it in choppy seas. So far it seems to be cutting its way
through the water easily, but the captain so far hasn't had to do any tight
turns, so I can't get a judge on how stable it is yet.

The boat suddenly picks up speed as we leave the bay, and the imposed speed
restrictions. The water on the open ocean is a fair bit rougher than in the
bay, but still nothing disastrous. The boat is continuing to skim across
the chop with ease, and the ride feels stable and comfortable, so I've
really got my hopes up now that the captain will have some fun. I can feel
the momentum of the boat change as the captain alters direction and turns
relatively sharply. The boat negotiates the turn with ease, although a
little bumpier than when travelling in a straight line. I feel confident
the boat can handle some tighter turns without coming to grief, but so far
the captain hasn't tried any more. He seems to be heading closer into
shore, which is because the water is likely to be calmer there. Well, at
least that is my thoughts on the situation, because I can't think of any
other logical reason for why he would be taking us closer to land.

The captain whets my appetite more when he opens the throttle to its
maximum. The bow lifts from the water through the sudden acceleration, but
only momentarily before settling down again. We are ploughing through the
water at the boat's highest speed, and it is handling it with ease, despite
the lumpy conditions. I am thirsty for more, and hoping the captain starts
to play around, like he did the last time we were on it. This is the most
anticipation I've felt about something for a while, so I'm hoping I won't
be left disappointed. As hard as I try I can't keep my feet on the ground
and be realistic about things, because in my mind it is completely safe for
the captain to let loose and throw the boat around like a toy. I know, I
know, the captain knows best, and won't do anything which compromises our
safety, but with the way it has gone so far it is hard to stay level
headed.

Without noticing initially, the boat is making a long sweeping arc, as it
turns to run parallel with the shoreline. The turn is so smooth and gentle
that it goes un-noticed until the rocky coast is beside us, instead of in
front. We are still tearing along at a great rate of knots, but to my
disappointment the captain hasn't attempted any tricks, so far at least. I
have my hopes set on the fact that he will sooner or later start to play
around, as I think he is trying to build the suspense at the moment. The
grunty throb from engines suddenly eases, before going completely
silent. The boat continues to coast along for a few hundred metres, before
losing its momentum and coming to a stop. The sudden change in events has
got me very worried, as the first thing which comes into my mind is engine
failure, and the last thing I want is to be stranded out at sea.

"I apologise for the unannounced stop, but I thought it was important to do
this. Judging by everyone's confused faces I think I'd better
explain. Pierre, Josh and Callum, I'm surprised you don't recognise where
we are," the captain announces, once the boat has stopped and settled. Of
course Pierre, Callum and I instantly look around at our surroundings after
he says that we should know where we are, and it doesn't take long to click
as to the reason for the unexpected stop.

"This is where dad washed up!" Pierre exclaims loudly, after clicking on to
the significance of the location.

"Yes Pierre, you have remembered. I thought it would be a good chance for
everyone to see where your father was found, and for anyone who wants to,
to pay their respects. I can see that you are a lot happier and more full
of life, compared to the last time I saw you Pierre, but I still felt this
might be important for you," the captain says, whilst everyone else looks
around and tries to picture that fateful day as much as they can. The mood
on the boat has changed and become sombre, more than either Pierre or I
like. We know he has found closure over what happened, and the death of his
parents no longer upsets him, and we thought the others knew that
too. Xavier and Manuel's grandparents are the only ones who won't know how
much Pierre has changed since then, so I understand them feeling bad for
him, but the others surprise me.

"Come on everyone, cheer up. I'm happy to see this place again, as it is
the place where dad gave his life so I could meet all you guys. Without
that happening there is no way I would have ever met all you great people,
so this place should be remembered for the good things which arose from it,
and not the bad. Dad would have wanted it that way," Pierre says, as he too
picks up on the change in mood. I'm glad he did because there is no better
person to tell everyone how he feels, as I would never have come up with
the words he said. I can sense how he feels, but I'm no mind reader, so
putting his feelings into words would have been near on impossible for
me. Thankfully I didn't need to.

"Pierre, are you sure you are alright, because I remember your dad well,
and almost loved him as much as you did? He was a great man, and I'm
finding this place upsetting and uncomfortable. Especially now that I know
what happened here, so I can't believe you are so at ease being here,"
Xavier says. His voice is wavering, as he recalls the great times he must
have spent with Pierre and his dad, and he is struggling to hold it
together. It has come as a big shock to me, because I never knew how close
Pierre and Xavier were when they were younger. I can tell they were very
close friends, and Pierre's dad's death is affecting Xavier almost as much
as it affected Pierre.

"Shit, I'm sorry Xavier. I forgot how much dad meant to you as well. We did
have some great times with him, before everything happened. Yes, I am sure
I am over it, and Josh has helped me immensely with that. I have also come
to see that without this happening, my life would be completely different
now. Take your time and do what you need to in order to find closure over
dad's death, as none of us are going to make you rush, or feel any
different about you for it. I know I haven't said much about it to you, so
I will make sure we fill you in as much as I can about what has happened to
me since I moved from Avignon, but for now I want you mourn if you feel the
need to," Pierre replies apologetically. I can tell he is kicking himself
for forgetting about how close Xavier was to him and his family, but he is
more disappointed that he didn't make the effort earlier to better explain
what has happened to Xavier. This feeling has compounded from how we were
feeling after Xavier heard our French story while we were telling it to the
captain. It is something he knows he should have done out of respect to his
best friend, and now he has to try to make amends so he gets out of his
seat and wanders to his friend and hugs him.

"It's alright Pierre, in some ways it is my fault as well. I was horrified
when you first told me that your dad had died, but instead of letting you
know how much it meant to me, I bottled it up and tried to stay strong,"
Xavier blubbers, before finally allowing himself to lose control of his
emotions and cry. He grasps Pierre tightly, as he wants his best friend as
close to him as possible. If this had happened when we first met Xavier,
then I would be extremely jealous right now, but since I know he means no
harm, I'm happy to see the two hugging. I feel a little sorry for Bastian
though, because I know he wants to help comfort his boyfriend, but also
doesn't want to intrude in this private moment between two best friends out
of respect, so he looks lost and doesn't know what to do.

"Xavier, you have no need to blame yourself at all, because I should have
known. You shouldn't have had to tell me, after all I'm supposed to be your
best friend," Pierre emphatically says, before breaking down and crying
himself. Seeing his friend so upset has struck a nerve, and he is feeling
even worse because he forgot the importance his dad had on Xavier. I feel
cut up like how Pierre is feeling, but on top of that I also feel useless,
unable to help because like with Bastian I don't want to intrude. Unlike
Bastian, I know one of them will give us a cue when they are happy for us
to get involved, but the wait is agonizing.

I see Pierre ease up on his hug. It wasn't much, but enough that I could
see it clearly, so I give Bastian a nod to indicate to him that Pierre is
allowing him to take his place. Bastian doesn't click on at first, so I get
out of my seat, then go over to him and whisper in his ear what I'm
thinking. He understands what I am saying, but the expression on his face
tells me he isn't sure that I'm right about it. He is so scared of barging
in early and interrupting them at the wrong time, that he doesn't fully
trust my judgement. I try to tell him that it's fine, and I know Pierre
well enough to be able to pick up on the little clues he gives, but he is
still a little tentative about it. Seeing that he isn't going to take the
first step, I do it for him, and reach down to unfasten his harness. That
is all he needed to tell him that I am serious about it, but he still isn't
sure about himself.

He desperately wants to be there for Xavier, to show him he really cares,
but doesn't want to upset him by timing it wrong. If it hadn't have been a
moment between two best friends then he would have dived right in there to
comfort him, but it is and it is also about someone who he never knew. I
think that is the hardest part for him, knowing Xavier is upset about the
death of Pierre's dad, because he never met the man, so doesn't understand
how much he meant to Xavier. Not only that, but the friendship between the
two is closer than he realised. I mean he knew they were best friends, but
not to the extent where they loved the other's parents as much as their
own. I have to say that I didn't know that either, and figure out that the
two must have been damn near inseparable when they were younger. I'm happy
for them, but it makes it harder to coax Bastian to go over in order to
replace Pierre.

Slowly but surely Bastian picks up the courage to at least go over to
them. He is very tentative, and tries his best not to be noticed. It
doesn't work, because as I had guessed, Pierre had been waiting for him and
as soon as he sees Bastian heading their way, he eases up in his hug even
more. When Bastian is close enough he lets go of Xavier with one arm,
reaches over to the timid boy, grabs him and pulls him towards them. The
move catches Bastian by surprise, but it also tells him that I was right
and it is his turn to comfort his boyfriend. Now he knows this his
confidence climbs through the roof, and he has latched onto Xavier quick as
a flash. With Bastian embracing Xavier like both their lives depend on his
hug, Pierre slips away and leaves them to it.

Pierre wanders over to where I'm standing, and wraps his arm around my
waist while we watch Bastian comforting his boyfriend. He is doing a
wonderful job, despite not actually doing anything. Like Pierre and me when
we comfort each other at times like this, all he does is hug him. He
doesn't say anything to him, just allows him to grieve, while ensuring to
let Xavier know he is there for him. Gradually Xavier calms down and stops
crying, all through the love and comfort he is getting from Bastian. I
don't think the boy quite realises how much he has done for his boyfriend,
but he will find out soon enough, as I'm sure Xavier will want to thank him
for his help. The `thank you' comes quicker than I anticipated, and in the
form of a tender loving kiss, which temporarily catches Bastian off
guard. Not for long though, and he is quick to reciprocate.

I can feel the love flowing through them just from watching them kiss, and
I can feel a huge smile crossing my face as I realise how perfect they are
together. The odd thing is I notice everyone else with big smiles plastered
across their faces as well, meaning they are happy for them too. I never
expected that, but then again I didn't really have any idea what to expect
from the others. I suppose I should have expected them to be happy for
Bastian and Xavier, but since they aren't family I wasn't confident that
they would all be so concerned about whether they were right for each other
or not. I'm glad to know how much they all care about them, because it
emphasises just how accommodating they are to our friends, especially since
most of us have only known Xavier for a short time. I suppose the effort
they went to for Xavier should have told me how much they care, especially
mum who confronted the boy's father on his behalf. It still amazes me how
much she has changed, as it wasn't all that long ago when she hated Pierre
because of her strange belief that he turned me gay. Now look at her, she
has stuck up for a kid she has only just met while telling the boy's father
his son is gay, and out of everyone it is her that has the biggest smile as
she watches the two boys kissing.

The kiss isn't all that long, but long enough for them to both come out of
it with the most heavenly smiles on their faces. They both look like they
are floating, well at least that their minds are off the planet, and at a
guess I would say they are in a state of nirvana. I don't blame them
because I have been there plenty of times after kissing Pierre, but I am
impressed by the way Xavier seems to have found inner peace and in quick
time too. After having been so distraught at seeing the place of Pierre's
dad's death and almost totally breaking down, he has recovered
miraculously. A small part of that would have been from the comfort Pierre
gave him, but Bastian had the biggest impact by a long, long way. The kiss
of course topped it all off, making him remember that even though he has
lost someone he loved and cared about so much, there is now someone even
more special in his life.

The captain gives them a few moments to settle down, well, more to come
back down to earth, before he continues. Firstly he apologises, because if
he had known we were coming he would have invited the local kaumatua -
Maori for respected tribal elder - to come along and perform a blessing for
Pierre and all the family and friends. Unfortunately he wasn't available at
such short notice, and yes he did try to get him while we were away getting
lunch. It is a little disappointing that he wasn't able to arrange it,
because it would have been a great experience for our visitors, not to
forget the importance it would play culturally. The land will be tapu
(taboo) until a proper blessing is done, but Pierre doesn't necessarily
need to be there for the blessing; it would be a nice touch
though. Personally I wouldn't be surprised if the land has already been
blessed, because I can't see it being left tainted for too long. I don't
bother to ask the captain about it though, because I wouldn't want to
destroy the significance of the blessing, should we get the chance to do it
on our return trip.

The captain then says a prayer on behalf of all the seafaring people, to
once again reiterate what he said about all captains being like a tight
knit family. Not only that but he wants to because he feels close to us,
despite the fact we have hardly met. As I said the last time we saw him, I
felt there was something about the man because I trusted him, which for me
was a big issue at the time. I still have that same feeling now, because he
is a kind-hearted and caring person. He isn't doing all this for us to
increase his revenue, or for publicity. No, he is doing it all because he
wants to, as he cares about us enough to go out of his way to help out. I
don't know why he cares for us, especially back when we first met him, but
I am more than grateful for everything he has done, and so is Pierre and
the rest.

Once the captain has finished saying his prayer, he asks Pierre if he feels
up to saying one. Pierre is fine with the idea but doesn't know what he
wants to say, especially since he had found the closure he needed that day
in the Avignon cemetery. He feels he should say something, after all this
is the spot where they found his father, but for the moment his mind is
blank. Before he gets a chance to say anything anyway, Xavier pipes up and
asks if he can say a prayer first. He doesn't bother to wait for anyone to
answer his question, because he knows that if he does then he will chicken
out and not say what he wants to. His prayer is awesome, right out of his
heart. If I didn't understand how much Pierre's father meant to him before,
then I do now. He doesn't bother to hold back the tears while he says it,
because it would have been a losing battle anyway, but Bastian makes sure
he is hugging him all the way through the prayer.

His prayer is a long one, not helped by the amount of stops he takes to
recompose himself, but no-one puts any pressure on him to hurry up. It
gives us a big insight into the boy, and helps us understand how important
both Pierre and his father were to him. Pierre's face is full of shock as
he didn't realise quite how much they had done for each other, as it turns
out he helped Xavier through some pretty rough times. He had run away from
home numerous times, and always gone straight to Pierre's house because he
knew he was safe there, and Pierre's parents always welcomed him in with
open arms and allowed him to stay as long as he needed. The strange thing
is that he wasn't running away from his own parents, as it was his uncle he
was scared of. His uncle seemed to take pleasure to belting the crap out of
him for any little thing, but despite the torment and injuries he received,
somehow he kept it secret from his parents.

Xavier knew he shouldn't be getting hit the way he was, especially not from
his uncle, but refused to tell his parents what was going on. It wasn't
because his uncle threatened him not to tell, because if that was the case
he would have ignored him. No, the reason he didn't tell was because he was
ashamed. His uncle always belted him with the belt buckle, and on his bare
bum, so he knew if he ever told anyone then he was going to be forced to
show them the evidence. He was about six or seven at the time, but the
thought of people looking at his bum was too embarrassing for him,
especially since he knew it was red and cut up. This went on for six
months, and both Pierre's and his own parents were becoming increasingly
concerned with the way he kept running away for no apparent reason. They
had a feeling it was the uncle doing something to him, but couldn't prove
anything, which meant they couldn't kick him out for no real reason,
especially since he was helping to pay the mortgage.

Six months went past, with Xavier running away about every couple of weeks,
but no-one had a clue why. It was Pierre's dad who finally found out why
after putting pressure on his son to tell him what was going on. He had a
feeling that Xavier had told Pierre, but also knew that his son would have
been made to promise not to tell anyone. It took days for Pierre's dad to
make him understand that if something bad was happening to Xavier then it
would be in the best interests for him to tell, so they can fix the
situation. Pierre finally cracked, and told his dad everything he had been
told by Xavier, and within hours the uncle had been arrested and taken into
police custody. Xavier was furious with Pierre for a while after that,
because a promise had been broken, but yet again it was Pierre's dad who
helped the boy understand that Pierre only did it to save him from the hurt
he was getting. The other part that helped Xavier forgive Pierre was that
Pierre's dad took all responsibility for making his son talk, and let
Xavier know that Pierre really didn't want to tell, but the constant
pressure put on him made him crack.

Xavier has fully recovered from the ordeal, and bears no emotional or
physical scars from the abuse he suffered, but only because of the help
Pierre, his dad, and Xavier's own parents gave him. He apologises to Pierre
for being angry with him for telling his secret, because he doesn't
remember ever actually apologising for the way he treated Pierre for a
while afterwards. Pierre accepts the apology, because he knows his friend
would be offended if he didn't, but told him it was no big deal. In fact up
until now he had actually forgotten about it, because he never had to bear
witness to any of the abuse. Even if Pierre did witness it, I'm not sure he
would have remembered about it given the amnesia he suffered while in
France.

Xavier then goes on to tell us the truth about his feelings when Pierre
left, and he didn't cope well at all. He was so distraught and angry that
he tore his room apart, smashed holes in walls and kicked his door in. He
told the truth about not blaming Pierre, as it was Pierre's dad he was
irate with, because as he described it, it was like having the father
you've loved and cherished all your life suddenly walk out on you, never to
be seen again. He felt like he had been lied to, and that all the love and
care Pierre's dad showed him was all a sham. He felt betrayed and
disillusioned, and if it hadn't had been for the fact he had kicked a hole
in the door, then he would have locked himself in the room for forever. His
parents unsurprisingly became very concerned about him, but they worked
hard to bring him around to being able to accept and live with what had
happened.

Pierre is a little shocked at hearing just how badly Xavier took him
moving, but he too hated his dad for the decision. He didn't talk to his
dad for weeks after he got taken, because he was too pissed off at being
ripped away from all his friends, especially away from his best friend. It
didn't last too long though, because he knew it wouldn't solve anything, so
instead he spent the first year of their trip hassling his dad about going
back to Avignon to visit his friends. Gradually he realised he wasn't going
to get his wish just yet, so somewhat gave up. He never totally gave up
though, and continued to ask his dad every now and then, just not as much
as he had been. The reason Pierre never reacted the same way as Xavier did,
is because his mind was already lost and confused due the recent death of
his mother. If it hadn't been for that, then he would likely have torn the
boat apart, similar to how Xavier treated his room.

Xavier's prayer is as much about Pierre's dad forgiving him for how badly
he acted, as it is for him. He feels awful about how he handled things, and
especially about having hated and blamed the man for so long. He is trying
to reconcile things, because he knows it is half the reason he became so
upset before. As much as he tries he can't continue to hate the man now he
knows he is dead, although it has taken him a while to realise this. There
are too many good memories he wants to cherish again, instead of focussing
on the bad ones. All he hopes is that Pierre's dad accepts his apology and
gives him some sign to say he has. Of course he knows nothing about the
ghosts of Pierre's parents following us around, and to an extent I hope it
stays that way. I'm pretty sure Xavier won't cope at all well if the ghost
of Pierre's dad appeared in front of him, but I wouldn't be surprised if he
went through Pierre in order to help the boy.

All of a sudden there is a massive burst of wind which temporarily rocks
the boat from side to side. The movements are huge, leaving the edge of the
boat inches above the waterline, but as quickly as it started it all dies
down again. I know this is the work of Pierre's parents, as the sign Xavier
was looking for, but there was more to come. A beautifully clear rainbow
rises from the location Pierre's dad's body was found, and arcs miles into
the atmosphere. The sky is almost cloud-free by this stage, and there
definitely isn't any rain anywhere near us, so this certainly is another
sign from the parents that Xavier is forgiven. Xavier is looking amazed at
the show, but a little scared as well. He had hoped for a sign, but can't
believe that Pierre's dad could have forgiven him so easily and quickly, so
is worried that this may not be the sign he is after. I know it is, but
become immensely confused when the apparitions of Pierre's parents form in
front of me.

"Shhh Josh... you can't let anyone know you can see us. Xavier wouldn't
understand, and I think it would scare him too much if he knew there are
ghosts around," the heavenly voice from one of the ghosts says. I think it
is Pierre's dad, but like last time I saw them their apparitions lack
definition, so I can't make out the difference between one or the other. It
isn't too important because I know they have come to me specifically for a
reason.

"We decided that you were the best person to tell our response to, because
he wouldn't totally believe Pierre. I know Xavier and he isn't one to
accept forgiveness easily. He likes to make sure he has been sufficiently
punished for any wrong he has done, and as much as we tried to help him
with that, we never succeeded. Maybe you can gradually fix that problem,
but I know you have enough on your plate as well. All you need to do is
repeat everything we say from now on, Xavier will listen, and trusts you
enough not to take the micky," the other ghost tells me. I'm not sure what
to do now, as I don't want to nod my head, and I know I can't reply, so I
have no idea how to tell them I am up for the task. I don't need to as they
already seem to know I won't let them down, which I suppose is why they
came to me as opposed to François, or even mum.

"Xavier, Pierre's dad forgives you, although I know he blames himself for
the way you felt. He never thought about how his departure and that of
Pierre would affect anyone else. Well, more to the point he did, but tried
desperately to ignore it. He wasn't in the right mind-set at the time, and
made a big mistake. He never meant to hurt you, it was... well, he didn't
know what to do. Staying in Avignon constantly reminded him of his wife and
it all became too much. It was never about hurting you, and he is feeling
awful for not taking you into consideration. He also wishes he had listened
to Pierre, but remember that if it hadn't happened then we wouldn't all be
here today, in fact he knows things would have been vastly different. In
some ways things have been better because of his actions, and as much as
his death has been hard on you, you now have a bright future with Bastian
to look forward to because of it. Pierre's dad wants your forgiveness as
much as you want his," I say, repeating what I was getting told for a
while, but I knew what to say anyway, so added my own bit in.

"Of course I forgive him... now at least. I just wish I hadn't been such a
baby about it when it happened, because I've known all along that the only
reason they left was because he couldn't handle the constant reminders of
his wife. It was just so hard for me, because he didn't even say goodbye. I
went over to their house one morning, and... and... it was empty," he says,
breaking down as he remembers the scene that greeted him that
morning. Bastian pulls him into his body tighter, so he can hug him better.

"I'm so, so sorry. I never cry this much, please forgive me. After I came
to terms with things I learnt how to control my emotions, so that I'm like
any normal person. I shouldn't be crying, because I've got to stay strong
and not let my emotions control me again," he says, once he has his crying
under control again.

"Xavier, you can't bottle your emotions up either, because when you do that
you eventually burst like a dam. It isn't good for you. What you need to
learn is how to display your feelings properly, but you have done nothing
wrong today. It should be an emotional time for you, because you never got
any closure about Pierre's dad, at all. This is your time to find peace
with everything he has done, and mourn his passing, so don't be ashamed
with the way you're acting," I say, ensuring to make him understand that I
mean every word I say. I'm glad he hasn't asked me how I know what Pierre's
dad is thinking, because I'm not sure I could come up with a believable
answer. For the moment I want Xavier to let everything out, so he can move
forward from the issues about Pierre's dad.

"It's hard to know what emotions I need to show, because the kids at school
teased me when I turned up crying. That was a couple of days after Pierre
and his dad vanished, but it didn't seem to matter to them as they all
still called me a cry baby. After that I made sure I didn't show any
emotions at school, so when I got home I made up for it. I think I would
have coped so much better if they had at least said goodbye, and told me
the reasons for them going. I know Pierre had no choice in the matter, but
why couldn't his dad at least made sure I knew he loved me?" Xavier
blubbers.

"He couldn't... I tried to get him to see you before we left, but he
couldn't. You see he loved you too much. He loved you almost as much as he
loved me, which I wasn't surprised about because we spent all our time
together, so you became part of the family. The reason why we didn't say
goodbye is he couldn't bare to have to tear me, or even himself away from
you, so was scared of doing something stupid like kidnapping you. He didn't
say goodbye because he loved you, no other reason," Pierre says, surprising
us all as up until now he hasn't had anything to add on top of what I
said. Something tells me that this is something he has known for a while,
as opposed to something his father's ghost has told him. It is the way he
said it, like he had been trying to hide it as a secret for a while. I can
understand why, because a lot of people would have been freaked out by the
reason.

"He should have come over, as I would have been happy if he kidnapped me. I
missed you so much, and if that had happened then I know I would have been
happy," Xavier says, not really thinking about what he is saying, just
letting his emotions take control.

"Xavier, think about it... if he had done that then neither of us would
have been happy. The consequences would have been far worse than what
either of us went through. Dad would have gone to jail, and I would have
ended up in an orphanage somewhere. Then there are your parents, what do
you think they would have made of it? They would have missed you dearly,
and inevitably you would have missed them as well. It was never a good
plan, and you know it, and so did dad which is why he avoided the
temptation," Pierre says. He is right and everyone else knows it, but I'm
not sure about Xavier. He doesn't seem to be in a frame of mind to allow
him to think logically. I should know because I've been there plenty of
times before, so I also know that from now on there is only one person who
has the ability to get through to him, and that is Bastian.

Bastian doesn't need to be told this time around, since instinctively he
knows he is the only one who can get Xavier to see some sense. He gets
right to work, while we allow them some space and privacy. I can see that
Bastian is working wonders, and Xavier is responding very quickly to what
he is being told. For a moment there, Xavier looks rather ashamed with
himself, but Bastian quickly rectifies that. Xavier has come a long way in
such a short space of time, that no-one is at all concerned about his
reactions. We all know he isn't seeing sense, because he is trying to blame
himself for something he never had any control over. He has forgiven
Pierre's dad, I can tell that, but still needs someone to blame, so as per
usual he falls back on himself. He doesn't seem to understand yet that
there are things which happen in your life that there is no-one to blame
for. It just happens and no-one has control, but Bastian is quickly getting
him to see that, so he can forgive himself.

"Thank you everyone for what you have done for me today. Even those of you
who think you have done nothing, it has been the way in which you haven't
criticised or made me feel like I was doing wrong. Your silence has shown
your support for what I was going through, but Pierre and Josh, I owe you
the most. You, along with Bastian have made me be able to find peace with
what I have been through. To the captain, and Josh's mum, it is you I owe
the biggest thanks, because you brought this whole thing together, which
has allowed me to find some peace at long last. Thank you all for being so
patient and caring, but enough of this and let's have some fun!" Xavier
says after a while, proving how big an influence Bastian has had on
him. Everyone is so happy to see Xavier come such a long way, but it is
Manuel's grandpa who gets up. He wanders over to Xavier, gives him a hug
and whispers something in his ear, before returning to his seat. The look
on Xavier's face tells me what he has been told, and my guess would be
something like `welcome to the family'.

"Ok, well if I'm going to go along with Xavier's wish, then everyone should
return to their seats and belt up, because this could be a bumpy ride!" the
captain says, before starting the engines and revving them up. With that
Pierre, Xavier, Bastian and I return to our seats, and belt ourselves in,
ensuring the harnesses are as tight as we can get them. There seems to be
an extra spark in the captain's eyes after all that has happened, making me
think he is going to make sure we get a ride that none of us will ever
forget. I'm sure hoping so, because I loved the last ride we were on, so
desperately want the others to experience it too.

Once we are all safely in our seats and harnessed in the captain throws the
boat which is idling at maximum revs, into gear and we are on our way with
a bang. The sudden power sent through to the propellers throws the boat
forward, lifting the bow high out of the waterline, before it settles down
again. As soon as the bow has settled into its normal position the captain
starts to throw the boat into some turns. He does so cautiously at first,
because he wants to ensure the conditions aren't too rough for it, but as
soon as he is comfortable that the boat is handling the turns well, he
starts to show off. Despite the lumpy surface conditions, the boat handles
each and every turn with ease, and the ride is still surprisingly
comfortable as the boat skims across the chop instead of going up and down
them. It is so much fun, and I can feel adrenalin surging through my veins
as a result of the rush I'm getting. I can tell you that I can understand
why people do extreme sports, because this is an addictive drug, making me
want to experience it more and more.

We make it out to the hole in the rock in record time. Well, at least
that's how it seems, because we have been having so much fun that time just
flies past. The captain apologises to us because we won't be able to go
through it like we had last time, due to the choppy seas and it being too
low a tide to allow it. We have to make do with going around it, as close
as the captain is willing to get his boat, but none of us are
complaining. Some things can't be helped and are out of our control, like
the weather and the tides, so we have to make the best out of any given
situation, and that's what I plan to do. That would be the best thing I
have learnt during this whole adventure to get Pierre back, and it is
something I'm going to try live up to, day in day out. So getting up close
to the rock is ample for today.

We go around the hole in the rock a couple of times, before the captain
points the boat back towards the bay and guns the motors. The trip back to
the bay seems like it is over before it even started, despite the captain
having lots of fun and taking his time getting back. The old saying `time
flies when you're having fun,' certainly is true in this instance. We had
such a blast that time seemed to disappear in an instant, leaving us
feeling a little down when the boat slows to meet the speed
restrictions. Our fun is over and it is back to reality for us, although
that isn't all bad since we are still sort of on holiday. It is more that I
don't know if we will do anything quite as much fun as that during the
remainder of our trip. When the boat pulls up beside the dock and the
captain hooks up the mooring ropes, our hearts sink knowing it has come to
an end.

The disappointment is only fleeting, because none of us want to let it ruin
what has otherwise been a great day. It has been a lot of fun, along with
resolving some issues. It has been a day of healing for Xavier in
particular, but also Pierre as he had to deal with aspects of his past all
over again. He has handled it beautifully, showing he has found closure
from that period of his life and is looking to start anew. Xavier himself
now has the chance to put it all behind him, and start a new more positive
chapter in his life, but I think he still has a little healing to do first
before he is fully over it. I know it will be a long, slow process, but
with Bastian with him it will be a lot quicker than it would have been
otherwise. Overall the day has been a complete success, and one all of us
will remember fondly for a long time. The most surprising part is how much
Manuel's grandparents enjoyed it, as they seem revved to give it another
go, although like the rest of us know it won't happen. Hopefully they may
be able to convince mum to do more activities like this.

Once the captain has shut down the engines, and ensured the boat is
securely moored, he allows us to disembark. We all shake his hand and thank
him for the awesome trip. I should say most shake his hand. Pierre, Callum
and I feel comfortable enough with him to give him a big hug as our way of
saying thanks, but the biggest hug of the day comes from Xavier, who has
received the most help from the kind man. The captain gives us all a hug
back, but saves an extra special one for the one who needs it most. It is a
beautiful scene seeing Xavier getting a wonderful hug from such a great
man, who I think is quickly filling the void left from Pierre's dad. Xavier
seems to feel completely at ease with him, and most importantly he knows
the man cares. The good thing is that no-one is in a hurry to leave,
because it must have taken a good quarter of an hour to get through all the
thanks to the captain.

It is sad to have to leave the man, and not even offer to take him out for
dinner or something as added thanks for everything he has done for us. He
has a lot of work to do in cleaning up and preparing the boat for what
should hopefully be a busy day tomorrow, so even if he wanted to come with
us, he couldn't. We didn't bother to ask him, because we already knew he
would have his work cut out for him, but that doesn't mean we don't show
our thanks in another way. We go back into the terminal and up to the
reception, where thankfully the receptionist still is. We were a little
worried that given how quiet the day has been, she may have been given the
rest of the day off. She was, but since the captain went out with us she
figured someone should be here to man the fort, just in case someone wanted
to make an early booking for tomorrow or something. As much as we knew the
captain intended on giving us a free trip, we weren't going to allow it, so
instead we paid double what the cost should have been, as our way of saying
thanks for all he has done.

I am glad we were so generous in paying the captain for such a wicked day
out, but I'm disappointed I wasn't allowed to contribute. Manuel's grandma
made absolutely sure that I didn't pay a cent despite my pleas, but I gave
in to avoid an argument. I knew I wouldn't win this time, but figured that
there is always going to be a next time, so will try again at a later
date. I'm determined to pay my way, but I won't go overboard like she is
worried I will. I have never been one to spend money willy-nilly, which is
why I already have a lot of money in my bank account. I only get what I
need, with the occasional exception such as surfboards and accessories, but
then again surfing is the only thing which kept me sane for so long that to
an extent I did need the gear. I do understand Manuel's grandma's
viewpoint, so I know I will have to prove to her that I am good with money,
so she can ease up on me a little.

Mum tells us that we are free to explore the shops in Paihia for a little
while, but she wants us to meet up at the van at five o'clock, so we can
continue our journey to Taupo Bay before it gets too late. Hearing that
makes me excited that I might be able to purchase a couple of things I
really need. Well, more so want, but that's beside the point, because to a
large extent I need them too. The problem comes when mum says that there
must be at least one adult with us kids at all times, because she doesn't
want us getting lost, or most importantly, losing track of time. My first
thought is to go with François, but that was never going to happen due
to Manuel and Callum have become so attached to him that he was always
going to be their first choice. Sarah also chooses to go with François
and the youngsters, which is of no surprise to anyone, because she has
spent more time with him than anyone else. I have that sinking feeling in
my heart when Bastian and Xavier decide to go with mum and Manuel's dad,
because it means Pierre and I are left with Manuel's grandparents.

Don't get me wrong I love them so much, like they are my own grandparents,
but it means I won't be able to get what I want. That all comes down to if
I can find what I'm after, but Manuel's grandma won't let me purchase it,
because she is determined to stop me buying anything. I am tempted to try
and persuade Callum and Manuel to go with them, but I realise that I'm
likely to arouse suspicion if I do that. I sigh, knowing my plans have been
shattered before I could even get the ball rolling, but oh well that is
life I suppose. The disadvantage in being young, but I also know there are
so many other things which work to our advantage that we have to take the
disadvantages on the chin.

We leave the terminal building and head in different directions. Well,
everyone except Manuel's grandparents, Pierre and I, because they want to
have a look through the souvenir shop there. The shop is full of all sorts
of cool and beautiful pieces, made in New Zealand and from local materials
where possible. It is a great shop, and not one of the cheap and tacky ones
which seem to have cropped up everywhere, which also seem to sell more
Chinese made things, than kiwi. I see the most beautiful Maori design
greenstone necklace, which I fall in love with instantly, but realise I
won't be able to buy. It looks like the perfect present for Pierre, because
it symbolises everything he means to me, so I want it, and want it bad. I
have come to the conclusion that it is something I'm willing to get into an
argument with Manuel's grandma over, but I want to do it discretely so
Pierre doesn't know I have bought it for him.

"Manuel's grandma, I have a big favour to ask you. Would you allow me to
buy this greenstone necklace for Pierre? I want it because it is the
perfect symbolism of everything he means to me. I want to get it as a
present for him, although I'm not sure when I'll give it to him, because I
feel it should be a special present," I whisper in the most pleading voice
I can manage, once I have managed to get her on her own. Pierre has gone
with Manuel's grandpa and is looking at something on the other side of the
shop, meaning I don't have to worry about him seeing or hearing what my
plans are.

"Sure thing Josh, that is one thing I will allow you to purchase. It is
wise and has significance behind it, so there is no way I can refuse to
allow you to buy it. I am in favour of you getting Pierre wonderful gifts
like this, because it will only help to strengthen your relationship. I
only have one question though, and that is do you have the money on you to
be able to afford it?" she asks, also in a whisper. It is at this point
that I realise I have mentally bought it without knowing how much it is
going to cost, and when I see the price tag on it my heart drops out of my
body. I shake my head to say no while doing my best to hold back the
tears. I am feeling gutted about it being out of my price range, because it
is due to mum only allowing me to carry one hundred and fifty dollars on me
at any one time that I can't afford it. If I could get an Eftpos card then
it would be no issue, but I don't stand a chance in that either, unless we
get a permanent address in New Zealand so they have somewhere to mail it.

"Josh, Josh, don't feel upset about it. I figured your mother was wise in
only allowing you to carry a certain amount of money on you, but I never
said that if you couldn't afford it then you couldn't get it. I will pay
for it on your behalf, and you can reimburse me when you can. I think it
will work out better this way in any case, because Pierre won't know what
is going on," she replies, seeing me on the verge of tears. I almost jump
up and yell out in celebration when she tells me that all is not lost and
she will get it for me, but I know that would have alerted Pierre and
ruined everything. Somehow I manage to keep my excitement under control,
but it doesn't stop me showing how appreciative I am, by kissing her on the
lips.

Before she heads off to pay for it, she tells me to finish browsing through
the shop and then to head out the door and wait for everyone. It doesn't
take me long to get bored with looking around, so I leave the store, find a
bench and sit down. Almost immediately I am accompanied by Pierre, who sits
beside and wraps an arm around me. It feels wonderful, so I lean over until
my head is resting on his shoulder. I feel so wonderful at the moment that
I could easily close my eyes and fall into a blissful sleep right there and
then. Pierre hugging me helps me feel that way, as I know I am safe and he
will look out for me, but I know I can't do it. Not yet anyway, because we
still have stuff to do, so I just relax in the comfort he provides as we
wait for Manuel's grandparents.

They take a little while, longer than I expected. It is Manuel's grandma
who comes out first, followed by Manuel's grandpa a good five minutes
later. As soon as he joins us, Pierre and I stand up and we leave the
terminal building, heading towards the main shopping area. The shops are
more for the influx of tourists this region sees during summer, more than
it is designed for the permanent residents. It doesn't take us too long to
have seen all that Paihia has to offer, and to my disappointment there
isn't an electronics store. The closest I have seen would be a mobile phone
shop. I figure this is probably my best chance to get something with which
I can communicate with Dan and Caleb, but I know I won't be getting a
computer. My next best bet is to get one of those smart-phones, which
essentially is a small pocket computer, but Manuel's grandma is likely to
be my biggest hurdle still.

On our way back past the phone store, as we head towards the van, I decide
to ask Manuel's grandma if she would let me get a phone as well. I know I'm
pushing the boundaries with this one, but I figure it is best to at least
try instead of spending forever wondering if she would let me. As we get to
the entrance I decide to try my luck, but first I need to get her inside
and find what I'm after. That is the easy part, because all I do is suggest
we have a look in here, and walk in. Everyone else follows without even
thinking about it. We are still a little early to head back to the van so
they are looking for an excuse to waste a little more time, so this is as
good a reason as any.

We take a quick look at all the phones, and I'm surprised at how many
different models there are. What impresses me more is how advanced they
have got, as they really are mini computers, which makes choosing what I
need very difficult. I don't need anything too flash, but I want it to be
able to access things like Facebook easily. To be honest I don't have a
clue what I want, because I don't have a lot of use for one. A computer I
could make use of, but a phone I think would be a waste. All the phones
look either too basic, such as the ones with no internet capability, or far
too fancy, making me confused. I don't know what to do, but I know this is
the best opportunity I have to get something to contact Dan and Caleb with,
so have to think of something.

"Argh... sorry, but I came here because I really wanted to get something
which I could use to contact Dan and Caleb with, and I can't find
anything. It is either too basic, or far more than I will ever need. I
don't know enough people, nor want to, to warrant getting a smart-phone," I
say, frustrated as hell at not being able to find exactly what I want.

"Josh, it's alright. I figured that was the reason you brought us in
here. Here's the only solution I can come up with, how about I buy the
phone because mine is getting old and I need a new one anyway, but I'll
allow you to use it to contact your friends. I know they mean a lot to you,
because I overheard you talking about them the other day. To say the least
I wasn't impressed with your mother for not trying harder to enable you to
get in contact with them, so I will help," Manuel's grandma replies, making
me feel so much better about how the day has gone. I feel that she is
starting to understand me, and realise I'm not reckless with money, but
more importantly it shows how much she cares, and will help me.

It only takes a couple of minutes for her to find the phone she needs, with
help from a sales assistant. It takes even less time for her to buy it,
because she has opted for pre-paid given her time in New Zealand is only
limited. She has ensured that the phone she bought is still going to work
once she has returned to France, because she doesn't want to buy something
that was only going to be of use while she was here, because that would
have been a waste of money. She gets what she needs, which doesn't surprise
me because, I know how commanding she can be, and won't let anyone try to
rip her off, let alone sell her more than she needs. Her abrupt attitude,
and my direct translation, immediately had the attendant too scared to try
anything, although I was almost let down when my voice decided to play up
again, but I didn't falter.

She gets what she needs, no more and no less, so we leave the store and
head back to the van happy. I'm thrilled and so is Pierre that we will be
able to make contact with Dan and Caleb again. We are looking forward to
being able to arrange a time to meet up with them, because it has now
become the most important thing that we have to do while here. Manuel's
grandparents are happy at having been able to help me out, and I know she
is thrilled to help me get the special present I wanted for Pierre. We all
have huge smiles on our faces as we reach the van, and are greeted by
François, Sarah and the youngsters. They didn't bother to look at the
shops, because François figured the boys would enjoy a play at the park
more than looking at things they can't afford to buy. He was totally right,
and they look extremely happy, although worn out and tired. I can tell that
they will be lucky if we reach Taupo Bay before they fall asleep. In fact I
think we will be lucky to leave Paihia before they crash, because
François has yet again done an awesome job in tiring them out.

Mum, Manuel's dad, Bastian and Xavier aren't too far behind us, and by the
looks of the bags full of souvenirs the boys have done quite a bit of
shopping. I'm not entirely sure who bought it all, but I can see they are
over the moon with their little shopping spree, so I'm happy for them. Once
they have got to the van and mum has unlocked it, we all get in and take
our seats. Before we know it we are on the road again, only stopping to get
some takeaways for dinner. We stopped at a coated chicken franchise, which
runs in direct competition to KFC, but to be honest is no better. It is
food and what we needed to sustain us until we can have something decent,
which isn't likely until tomorrow at the earliest. I have no idea whether
mum has even thought about what we are going to have to eat while in Taupo
Bay, especially since the local dairy isn't going to have much. I'm sure
she has something worked out, so I forget about the thought. My mind has
gone back to Xavier, and filling him in on our story, but after a quick
consultation with Pierre we decide it is too long a story to tell him right
now.

By the time we reach Taupo Bay, all of us kids are almost asleep. Sorry, I
lie, us older boys are almost asleep, but the youngsters on the other hand
crashed not long after they finished dinner. We pull up outside a house
which looks very familiar to me, but due to my drowsiness it takes me a
little while to figure out how I know it so well. It finally comes to me
and I work out it is the house next to where we used to live, the place
with the beautiful garden that we took a leak in before Pierre was taken
from me. It is a glorious house, but I never realised it was quite as big
as it is, let alone have any idea how mum managed to persuade the owners to
let us use it for however long we are staying. I'm too tired to think too
much about it, so once mum has killed the engine of the van and unlocked
the front door, I drag myself along with Pierre into the house. Mum quickly
shows us where we are sleeping for the night, and almost before she has
left the room Pierre and I have stripped and climbed into bed. Moments
later we are cuddled closely together and in a deep sleep.

"Wakey, wakey... I need you two boys up, showered and dressed within an
hour. Your clothes are on the chairs beside the window, and the shower is
in your ensuite. If you have any problems getting dressed then see Manuel's
grandparents who are in the next room on the left. Meet us on the beach in
an hour tops, you won't have any problems finding us," mum says, once she
finally sees us stirring the next morning. I've got no idea what the rush
is about, but I know we better do as we are told because we don't want to
hold anyone up like what has become the norm for us. She quickly leaves the
room, so we can awaken properly, before getting ourselves ready.

************

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