Date: Sun, 21 May 2000 11:04:53 -0400 (EDT) From: Jill Anderson Subject: A Story of Self Exploration (F) I think that the worst thing about me is that I cling too much to people. That is how I lost my first girlfriend. She said that although she was infatuated with me, I was too needy. That I was too high maintenance. Well that may have been but I think I could have been forgiven since I was just 16 and she was 18. I think we would still be together if we met today. But I still seem to go through women like water which brings me to this evening. I was surfing the web like I do on occasion when I am without companionship and came upon a site dedicated to sexual stories. Now being that I do not usually get into that kind of thing I was going to pass it up, but something in my head told me "What the hell, look around" So I did. There were many categories so I chose one at random and picked a story called "Kansas". It was a fairly long and complex one but I could not get enough of it. I kept looking around my empty apartment guiltily thinking that I was going to get caught reading this. The more I read, the more turned on I got. I poured myself a glass of red wine and got comfortable on my couch. As I read I found myself slowly stroking my body as I read of this woman's exploits. I reminded myself of the times I used to masturbate in college when my room mate, Cindy, used to bring her man-of-the-week over. She always thought I was asleep but I wasn't. To listen to her grunt and groan would always make me wet. I would slip off my panties and watch them in the dark. I could make out her face, contorted and grimacing with pleasure, On nights that I feel really lonely I think of those nights 8 years ago and smile to myself. I masturbated more then than now, but after reading "Kansas", I was bound to give those days a run for their money. By the time I got to the end of the story, I was hot, bothered, and now a little buzzed by the wine. I made my way to the bathroom, turned off all the lights and lit some candles I had nearby. I took off my panties and noticed how damp I was. I stripped and put my leg up on the toilet seat and put my hand between my legs. I started to rub my lips methodically and after a few moments I looked down and I could see my hand glisten with my juices. I tasted myself, savored it and drew a hot bath. Now I don't have a great body (I'm 31-24-32) but I think I look alright. As I got into the tub I let my chest sit above the water line and began to stroke my nipples. I spread my legs as far as they could and I made my way down to my clitoris and lightly flicked and played with it. I remembered the story I just read and thought of the woman in the story, Susan. She had a night where she masturbated with everything she could find in her bathroom. That turned me on so I looked around and found my back scrubber and put the wooden handle between my legs and pumped it up and down. My already swollen clit took an instant liking to it. I arched my back and in the candle light I could this giant handle attack my pussy. I bit my lip as I could feel that old feeling rising in me. But I knew that I was getting pretty raw from the handle, so I looked around for something else. In the story, Susan used a shampoo bottle so I decided to try the same thing. I have one of those bottles with the ridges up the side for easy gripping so i took it and put that side up against my screaming clit. I rubbed it furiously up and down my lips and I could hear my breath start to hitch. My hips were bucking and water was sloshing over the sides of the tub, but I didn't care. I kept thinking of Susan in the story and how she did what ever she had to do to get off, something I admire. "Susan...Susan.." I said over and over. I could imagine her standing over me, stroking my hair, smiling, watching me cum. Thinking of her brought me over the top. My legs slammed together as my body was racked by a fierce orgasm. I kept screaming her name over and over until it had subsided. I could feel a teardrop in my eye and knew it was there because of the pleasure and pain of being rubbed raw to climax. I laid in the tub slowly touching myself with my now trembling fingers. By now my lips were very swollen and it almost hurt to touch them but I didn't care. I inserted to fingers into me and I could feel another orgasm rise in me through the incredible pain/pleasure I was feeling. This time I was crying for old room mate Cindy. As I came, I was sobbing and crying like a little girl. I couldn't believe it! I had tears streaming down my face, my fingers were ramming in and out of me and I was having one of the most intense orgasms I have ever had. As the waves of pleasure subsided, I dried myself off and drained the tub, thinking about what I would be doing tomorrow night, I smiled and went off to sleep, dreaming of Susan and Cindy.