Date: Sat, 9 Feb 2008 09:57:15 -0800 (PST) From: Nate House Subject: The Silent Cellist 7-8: Professional Help Chapter Seven: Diary Entries of a Sane Mad-Girl August 28, 2154 Dearest Illitor, Things at the store were pretty slow today. Roger said that sales have been slowing in part to the colleges and schools getting into full swing and the students have already purchased their books. Some of my more loyal fans were those very people and now the crowd that gathers when I play has begun to wane, but they still enjoy my show either way. Today was also the first day I've ever repeated a song. It was the first one I played after Roger told me to leave. I think when he heard that song he began to get teary eyed, but I know he'll never admit it. He's not that kind person. Come to think of it, he still hasn't really opened up to much about why I only recently met him. I know not of his motives, but I do know he feels some level of shame. Whether if it's for me or him, I'm not entirely sure. What I do know is he doesn't tell the people my name when they ask about me. Instead he refers to me as his "father's daughter". True? Yes. Painful? Yes, which brings me back to the issue of his shame. I know he'll never admit it, but I think it's his own way of making up for the fact that he hasn't seen me since I was four; the age that most people spend learning about numbers and the alphabet I was put through my father's and mother's infidelities and fighting. My other brother, from my birth parents, was mixed up in it as well, but he was granted the luxury of being killed by that madman whereas I am forced to live with the memory of it all. Roger is not much different although he never talks about it. Regardless, I am becoming more and more grateful for him finding me here. I don't know why, and probably never will, I was drawn to this place for reasons beyond understanding. Well, the few days I've been here have gone by fairly well. I have a permanent roof over my head and food in my belly. I have a soft sofa to lay on when I sleep and affection from my last family member. All in all, Illitor, I don't think we could have ask for say for Sarah being able to enjoy it with us. I know, I know, old friend, I promised to myself that I will bring her name up as little as possible, but I though she was worth the mention. Illitor, I'm not a scary person am I? I know what my face and body looks like and I know that His voice visits me from time to time, but I don't think of myself as a scary person. I know you would never think of me as such, but what do you think about the people who watch me play? I think the only reason they come as often as they do is because they've never really seen my face. Damn those fucking people for giving me this face and these eyes. Thinking back on it, Sgt. Cook was poisoning me for those few days. I guess that means I've cheated death once again. I can't describe it, but that look of shock and horror on Brittany's face instilled this feeling of self-sorrow once again. Illitor, why must her presence give me so much peace? I don't know why, but when she's around our playing becomes more emotional, much deeper than before her arrival. Even though my eyes are closed and would be looking down at Inikye if open anyway, I can still feel her standing in the group. It's like Inikye is telling me she's there and we must tell her our story. Actually, come to think of it, she didn't come around today. Maybe she's too frightened of me to ever come back. My heart is sinking at the thought of that idea. It's so confusing, Illitor. I guess, though, I can only hope for her to come around tomorrow before she leaves for her tournament this weekend. Either way, I hope she does well. Goodnight Illitor. All three of us are in need of rest. Love, Amanda ************************************** August 29, 2154 Dearest Illitor, The rain we received all morning made it nearly impossible for Inikye to hit any notes. His strings and my bow were slipping all over the place. My fingers could hardly keep pace with the music in my mind's ear. I could hear the voice of a Siren calling me, compelling me to play these certain songs. They wanted me to play their story. Even though I attempted it with everything I have, I think they were very disappointed. After the sun came out and the rain stopped, they stopped talking to me. Inikye and I weeped for our pitiful attempt to play the songs of these celestial beings. Roger called me crazy for wanting to play in the rain, but I just smiled at him saying, "I think you're right". Good thing we got the joke for Inikye thought it insulting. Oh well, big brothers are supposed to pick on their smaller siblings, right? Speaking of Roger, he told me he got a call from the "hospital" and I'm due for check-up. He said it would be my decision if we go or not, but I made that decision long ago. I never want to see the inside of that wall ever again. I've seen it enough and the haunting memories of daily beatings and rape still replay in my brain at every waking opportunity. Not to mention He uses that to make His voice that much more painful with every visit. Why must my courage fail me every time I want to end my pitiful life? Illitor, why was I spared my father's deadly wrath? Why must I be destined to walk among the living public as nothing more than a ghostless shell? I know no one knows the answers, but to hear some would still be nice, no matter how empty they may be. Still today, I have not seen Brittany. Inikye has already been put to bed and I am writing this before my usual time, so there is still time for her to come into the store. However, I doubt she's coming today. If the weather didn't keep her away, then her weekend prospects did. I need to see her once again, Illitor. I don't want her last memory of me to be that of disgust and fear. I wish that upon no one. I know my face, in fact my very livelihood, is an eyesore for most, but our talk under the tree made me believe she can be so kind and speak her mind to a complete stranger. She's even made an attempt to find out about where I came from and who I really am. Even though I probably couldn't tell her myself, I still wish for the opportunity to do so. I guess I'm letting my hope get the better of me. I know all too well what happens when you place hope before reality. I've seen with my own eyes what happens to those who live in their own misguided dreamland only to find out too late that the reality is they are tied to a chair being electrocuted until their hearts beat no more. I can still smell their hair and flesh burning as they begin to understand the severity of their real situation. Oh, the smell of burning death will forever be etched into my mind's nose and that alone is enough to fill even the most battle-hardened person with wanton rage. Hope is a good thing, unless you're in a bad situation; it can drive a man insane. But letting hope and will give way to sorrow and despair is even worse, as Sarah always told me when she held me close. Sorry Illitor, but Roger is calling me for dinner. We're going out tonight for "more sibling bonding" as he always calls it. Have a good rest. I told Inikye that you said "hello" to him since you two haven't really seen each other much these passed few days. For that, though, I am the one who is sorry. Goodnight, old friend. Love, Amanda ************************************* Chapter Eight: Start of a New Year Brittany had to will herself to remain focused. The upcoming tournament had to be the only thing on her mind if she was to get her team on the podium. She had to intensify her emotions to keep the team, not to mention the more inexperienced kids, on track and ready to fight. Her confusing situation outside of the nets and school made this feet all but impossible. She still had that nagging feeling of being watched all the time. Brittany could tell she was getting used to it, but knowing that it's there, always following you, is never a comfort. Kayla has made repeated attempts to reconcile with her. This by itself was growing more and more annoying; then multiply it to all of the other things she has going on and you've got the makings of a bad day. And yet through it all was Amanda. Her playing and her kind words of encouragement were toppled in a single instant when Brittany looked unto her face. The scars, the ebony hair and those eyes. Yes, it was the eyes, or rather apparent lack of them, that drove her into this state. She couldn't tell if she were alive or dead to look upon her. Brittany couldn't recall seeing her face at the party that night, but didn't at all feel threatened by her. In fact she felt at ease sitting next to her under that tree. Her hoodie was her proof that she was the one released from the mental institution not too long ago, but that in itself meant nothing. Why would they release her if was still insane? During the last couple of days she couldn't find the courage to go back to the bookstore and at least watch her play. That hypnotic, majestic sound could turn anyone's day around, but so could looking into those pearls of nothingness she calls eyes. Brittany kept replaying those thoughts over and over in her head as the team loaded the gear and paint into the assorted vehicles. She barely spoke a word and none of them were about the truth behind her state of mind. Her face remained a ghostly pale and her lips continued to tremble through loading the gear and role-call. Brian and Curtis had seen Kayla trying to talk to her earlier that day and assumed that was issue behind their friend's agony. Brittany decided it best to them keep thinking that for the time being. Brittany's mom remained true to her word. She offered her van to carry whatever would fit. Fortunately most of the equipment fit into coaches' cars. Brittany rode up front next to her mom while, naturally, the other line captains rode with them. Frank and Thomas were behind them, much to the disappointment of the Sanders sisters. With all of the gear, paint and people loaded and the drivers had the directions to the field and the hotel, they were off before school let out for lunch. It was going to be a six hour drive to the venue and thus would be plenty of time for high schoolers to be themselves. That is to say as long as you weren't riding with Brittany's mom. "So Brit," Frank asked from the back seat with a sound of optimism, "how do you think the JV team will do tomorrow?" Brittany hesitated for a second before answering. "I think they'll do alright," she said trying to take her mind off of her personal issues. "As long as they stick to their freaking game plans and actually listen to the coaches. That was their biggest downfall last year and that's why Coach decided to unify the team like he did. They need to know what it's like to actually train to be good at what they do." "I agree," Brian said. "I watched all of their games last year and they didn't seem to know what the hell the other team was doing out there. Their game plans and the technical stuff wasn't bad, they just didn't have the open communication amongst themselves and the coaches. Most of their break-outs went as planned, hell they even got one or two kills seventy-five percent of the time, but then they would fall apart mid-point. Their average spread was minus five points." "That leads us back to the issue of the training," Curtis said leaning between the seats. "Like what they always say, 'To train the mind, you have to train the body'. I think that the next full week we have off from school we should put them through their own 'Hell Week'. Seems to work for us every year." He had the rest of the people giggling by that point. Brittany remembers every one of those weeks. They are definitely not designed to be fun. "I think someone's gonna have to sit down with me tomorrow and explain this game to me," Brittany's mom chimed in. "I'm glad that you kids are passionate about this game, but there is more to life than just that. How are your grades doing anyway." "A's and B's," everyone said in unison, as if prepared for the question. True or false, it did bring a smile to her face to hear it. "What about you Thomas?" Curtis asked, looking back at him. "I honestly think they're gonna get smashed," he answered harshly. "They've only been practicing with us for about a week or so, so they are in no way totally prepared for what they're going up against. Granted, they look a hell of a lot better than last year's squad, but so does Clemson High and those other powerhouse teams. I'm not trying to be pessimistic or anything, just giving my honest opinion." "Good thing that their allowed up to three Varsity level players on their roster," Brian chimed in. "'Cause you're right, the guys on the Shady Bluff and Clemson High teams, both JV and varsity, spend their entire summers playing with some of the national level teams, away from the high school series. Hell one of them was being scouted by the New England Hurricanes." "Yeah," Curtis challenged, "Well Brittany's played on teams in both national leagues in Semi-Pro and Division 1 levels." This brought a smile to Brittany's face. She's even been approached by the Philadelphia Assassins and San Diego Dynasty several times in the past. She is regarded by many to be the best female player of all time, and one of the best players in the country. More than once has a Pro team come to her, even offering money, trying to get her on their roster and every time she turns them down to stay in school and with the groups she's been training. Still, the idea of playing on the Pro circuit is the dream she's always wanted. The caravan of the team stopped at about the midway point to the hotel and venue to fill up on gas and get some lunch themselves. The captains and other players got back to being what they are at heart, teenage high schoolers. It brought a smile to Brittany's mom's face to see her mingle with her friends and having a good time. Thinking back on it, she and her brother were the best of friends since she was born. Her brother would never allow anything to harm her, he was her guardian even though she was only his father's daughter to him. Even when they played on the same teams throughout their playing history, he wouldn't allow any of the other teammates to even ask her out on a date. He taught her to be the best player she could be, and she took those lessons to heart, and he also taught her how to be a strong individual. Brittany's mom was flashed out of her memories of the two of them together by the honking of Coach Wilson's car horn. Somehow, even in the trance-like state she was in, managed to fill up the gas tank and get something to eat. He honked his horn as his usual signal being ready to get back on the road. This was the farthest the team will have to travel this year, if their schedule held true, and he wanted to not waste daylight here when they could be planning for the event. The rest of the trip was filled with conversation not unlike from earlier. The only difference was the subject changed to the varsity team and what they had planned after school. Brittany and her mom listened to the guys behind them talk about which Pro teams they want to play for and what-not. "What about you Brittany?" Brian asked after a short while later. "I'm not sure yet," she answered half-heartily, should the truth be told. "Come on, Brit," he pressed, "if you could pick one team right now to play on, which one would it be?" "I'd have to look at what their offering and I'd preferably play on an Angel sponsored team since we go back a while. I would have to say either the Assassins, Dynasty or the Bushwhackers. All of them are Angel sponsored and play both Pro leagues, and I've played on all of their Semi-Pro teams, plus I know most of the guys on the teams. It all comes down to what they're offering." "So it really doesn't matter as long as it's sponsored by Angel? Hey, makes sense from a business standpoint. They offer you anything yet, by the way?" "Yeah," she answered a little more upbeat. "They offered me a job as a Marketing Director once I graduated high school. I got the letter yesterday. I'm not sure if I would take it or not." The group went back and forth with all of their future plans for the remainder of the trip once again. The idea that Brittany wouldn't take the offer seemed pretty far-fetched, but then again, they aren't in her head either. She just let them talk amongst themselves while she kept her thoughts to herself. They reached the field with time to spare. The team and the coaches set right to work teaching to newer players how to walk a field and get a basic gameplan formulated. As they walked and talked, the coaches let the cat out of the bag about a big surprise they kept hinting at all week. "All right, everyone gather 'round!" he called out from across the Center Court field. "Some of you may have had a idea about this 'surprise' that's been floating around the grapevine. Everyone, behind me, wearing civi-clothes are some of the members of San Diego Dynasty. They've agreed to come all the way across the country to help us prepare for the event." Pointing to each of them, he introduced them, "This is Craig Wilson, next to him is Steven Greenspan, who also is one of the owners of the team, and last-but-not-least we have Franklin Curtis." Everyone, Brittany included, was beyond flabbergasted. She's played along side these guys at some practices in the past, but for them to take time out of their own lives to come and help them. Coach Wilson thought some of his newer guys fainted when the announcement was made. Steven stepped forward from the group, "Let me just say that we feel honored to be here. Brittany has more than inspired us for as long that we've known her. Trust me, you will not find another player that will teach you more than she can. Hell, she revised our training regiment in the small time she was at our camp." Brittany was in full blush as her old friend, that she respects so much, spoke so highly of her. "We're going to be here with you guys the whole time. The three of us will be in the pits and on the other side as well, coaching you along. We'll help develop the game plans for tomorrow and Sunday, plus be scouting to the other teams' games for you. Consider it a favor from a friend-of-a-friend." With that, he winked at Brittany, who continued to turn an even darker crimson from his words. After they finished walking the fields and ate dinner, all of the players met in Coach Wilson's room to discuss the game plans with the pros chiming in when they were called upon. Brittany new that this year's JV squad has improved and meshed together far greater than anyone would give them credit for. If they stuck to their specific jobs and played the game the way they've been trained to play it, then no one should touch'em. "Remember," Frank said after everything started to quiet down, "keep you guns rolling and those lanes filled. If a guy, or girl, excuse me, gets shot out of a key spot get it filled immediately. Make it down field as far as you can, as fast as you can. With the new rule book, you have forty minutes to score as many points as possible without the mercy rule to stop you. Run up the score and make them disrespect your style. Other teams will see that and will start to feel afraid to play you. That's how we've managed to win almost all the time. When you're out there, don't forget your basics. Keep tight and keep shooting." Right after his little speech, the team scattered into their respective rooms to settle in for the night. It is nearing ten o'clock and the captain's meeting is scheduled for six in the morning. The JV captain and his varsity counterparts immediately took to their pillows after a relaxing shower. A few stayed awake for a little while until the Sandman came to take them away. Most dreamed glorious dreams of glory. Standing on the podium, holding that big trophy over their heads while their fans and families cheered their names and the media snapped pictures. Brittany on the other hand did not. She continued to see Amanda's expressionless face and lifeless eyes in every corner of her mind. She awoke with a start on several occasions in a cold sweat and gasping for air. It felt as though Amanda's look alone could scare the life from her. This scared her even more than actually seeing her in person. She is nearly the entire state apart and she still haunts her every move, either waking or asleep. The next morning couldn't come soon enough. Brittany had already been awake for the better half of the night; she resigned herself to the fact that her visions will not let her drift into what is supposed to be her place. She was already partially dressed when the wake-up call entered her room. Brittany put the rest of her stuff into her gearbag and went to the lobby to grab a bagel. She found several of the others already there and eating what little they could to settle their nervous stomachs. They sat around and chatted for a small time before the coaches rounded everyone up to meet in the parking lot. The team and their newly appointed coaches reached the field before most of the other teams. The cool, stagnant air, rank with the scent of a paintball field, gave little solace to the sight it will behold in just a few hours. Brittany could see her breath hanging in the dark morning air as she led her team to their staging area. They could hear the distinct sound of blowers filling the bunkers while the team was offloading the gear and paint from the trunks of the vehicles. Brittany's teammates had no idea of what hideous thoughts ran through her head as she got herself ready to go for today. Strangely, she separated herself from the rest of the team to go through her stretches and basic warm-ups. Whenever someone tried to get close to her to follow suit, she would move to another isolated spot. Brian has seen her do this only once before in all the years he's known her and he didn't have a good feeling about it then either. Even when Tina tried to approach her, Brian quickly took hold of her arm and silently shook his head "no". After the captains meeting broke out, Coach Wilson passed the schedule out to the teams. The JV team, who would play today and the varsity would play tomorrow, found that their first game wasn't until nine on field two. Some of varsity team, as well as Craig, took half of the squad to watch how the field played out while the other half went to scout their opposition. The younger team learned more in this past week about how to play this game as a team than they have in all of their years combined; of course it helps to have Pro level players helping you along the way. When nine rolled around, the kids were more than pumped and ready to go. Throughout the morning the more experienced players had been getting their adrenalin flowing, keeping them on edge about "blasting some faces off" or something else along those lines. Brittany suddenly felt an ease wash over her as they entered the pit area. It felt as though there was a distinct border hidden within the nets that her mysterious and ominous thoughts could not cross. Her brain quickly become completely resolved into the game and nothing was going to keep her out of it. She got their table and paint situation organized and ready to go with Franklin and Steven getting the players' heads into the game. She heard them yelling into their faces just as she does with the varsity team. Naturally, this brought a smile to her face, especially when the kids started yelling back. The coaches got the starting lines set and they seemed to teleport onto the field. Now is when all of that metal gets tested. All of the speeches, preparation and training can only bring you so far; it's how you actually do when you're in the nets that shows what manner of player you really are. Brittany could turn her nervousness into raw aggression, a skill she tries to pass on to every player she's trained, but it all comes down to that first "ten second" countdown. Without missing a beat, the head ref called the warning. She heard two of the five continue to yell and chant until about two seconds left. Brittany's fears and worries were soon put to rest as the opening point of the match was nothing more than a complete blowout. She could hear some of the players behind their pit saying something to the tune of "that's the fastest point a JV squad ever played". Kennview High jumped ahead with only ten seconds taken off the clock. The same thing happened on the next point. The other team completely turned orange from the paint being thrown at them while all five of Kennview's players jogged down the field to hang the flag for the point. This went on for the better part of the half. Coach Wilson played most of the same line for the first part of the half then would change it up as he saw fit; he refused to play any of his varsity kids until he absolutely needed to. That was not the story going on with the other team. They played some of their varsity squad on almost every point and still couldn't find a way to score for the first ten minutes. Brittany could feel her pride rising as the other team's morale plummeted. By the time the half was over, Kennview was ahead 10 to 2. "Don't let up!" Coach Wilson yelled at his kids. "Yeah they may have scored a couple of points on us, but it took them nearly the entire half to do it. Keep ramming it down their throats until they choke on it. If you let up for even a second, these guys are gonna come out and beat you down hard." He stopped for a second to look over his roster and let the kids bask in their first-half glory. "Alright, we'll be playing the same starting line as before. Let's see if you can make it another ten-second point!" Brittany took her leave from the pits to join Franklin and Steven on the far side to coach from their. She could hear the cheering from the grandstands behind them as Kennview took the field once again, their clothes barely showing any trace of paint. To look at Sommersville, however, one could barely see their green jerseys under the orange that now covers them. The trinity of players kept their cool about them as they know everything can change in an instant. "TEN SECONDS!" the head ref shouted as the teams got lined up. Kennview's team started to scream and chant again to keep their juices flowing. This made the three of them crack up a little. When the clock started, Kennview's JV squad continued the beat-down of the hometown favorite. They made history on this opening point as it lasted a mere nine seconds with an impressive, off-the-break run-through by Tony, one of Brittany's disciples. Sommersville tried to bounce back and scored a couple of quick points by playing more conservative, but it was clear who the dominant team was. Kennview High. By game's end, the scoreboard told the complete story: 22 to 5. This score actually set a new record for the JV league. "Alright guys!" Coach Wilson said over the cheers of his players. "We still have a long way before this thing is over so enjoy your first victory then get ready to go again on field one, Center Court, at ten forty-five. That gives you an hour or so to cool down, get rehydrated and ready Clemson." The team packed up all of their gear to make room for the next team to through. On their way out, they congratulated the other team on the game, but were met by sneers and idiotic remarks. The teams coming in, however, had nothing to say but good things about they way they played. They were impressed by the complete lack of penalties on both sides. When Tony, Ashley and the others looked into their eyes, they could tell Coach was right: they looked afraid to go up against them later on in the tournament. Brittany, Brian and the others took the team aside to go over the weaknesses that they saw. After the discussion and making a few changes to the plans, the squad went to the grandstands to watch this field play out. Franklin, Craig, Steven and the coaches pointed out what the losing team was doing wrong and how they should compensate on the next point. They watched as these two closely matched teams duke it out to a very low score. The squad took to the pits and readied themselves for their next match. Craig decided to watch from the stands to get a better view of the overall play while his cohorts stuck to their duties. This game was a repeat of the last. A forty minute beatdown of last year's state Junior Varsity champions. Clemson fell point after point to the team that didn't win a single game all last year. By game's end Kennview's kids bested them in a 16 to 6 blowout. Closer than last game, but nowhere near the match everyone was expecting. This secured Kennview's first-seed spot in the semi-finals. All they had to do was wait it out for the other teams to finish so they know who they would be facing in the first round. According to the rule book, the semis were a best-of-three style format. Whoever wins two of the matches gets the right to play for first and second in the same format, while the losers play a single game to decide third and forth. Kennview saw that McGregor High would be facing them in the semis as they managed to win both of their games as well while Clemson High and Northwood High finished off the bracket. Coach Wilson prepped his kids for the good news on their part. "No matter how this thing ends, you junior varsity kids have held up your end of the deal. With the way you have played today, you secured a spot on the podium and your half of the sponsor's offer is off of your shoulders. But don't let that fool you into thinking these guys aren't gonna stick to you. They won both of their preliminary games as well and they've been watching us all day. But they haven't played us yet! Go out there and show them how this thing is done!" The kids took his words to heart. The first game was nothing short of astonishing as Kennview smashed them in a near perfect victory for the first game: 12 to 1. Brian made it clear that going into the next game that they will be firing on all cylinders to make a comeback. Once again, the kids took it to heart and didn't let up until the final whistle blew. Ashley Sanders carried the flag into their penalty box for the last point of the game, though they really didn't need it, she was just happy to score the point for the team in their semi-final premier. The second game ended 10 to 3. Brittany couldn't help but feel overjoyed for them. She's been training and teaching them her entire career how to be winners, they just needed the spark to taste the victory. She went up to Ashley and gave her a huge hug for how far she's come so far. Brittany looked into her eyes and saw a lot of herself at her age, though she's just two years her junior. Ashley, on the other hand, took that hug to mean something entirely different, though Brittany wouldn't know it. The Kennview JV team ended up playing Northwood for the first-place trophy. Before the first match, the teams met at the center X for a small get together and "good luck" hand shake. An true act of sportsmanship for both teams. Back in the pits, however, the trash-talk started and it was business as usual. through the nets, they would taunt and tease each other for the sake of the small, budding rivalry between them. Brittany took the starting line aside for a quick briefing of what she and the others noticed about their playing habits. "They like to push the snake side with at least three guns on the break. Don't impale yourselves into their plan. If you see them laning to that side like that, keep going up the center and pick them off as they try to move upfield. Also, they haven't been playing the doritos for shit all day. They leave that whole side open for the taking." She paused and looked around for their fastest player. "Tony, your speed is what opens games. Run down their vacant side and shoot them to shit from behind!" With those last words, they broke out onto the field, exchanging a mixture of "good lucks" with trash talk. When the head ref put his hands over his head to give the "ten second" signal, Brittany started yelling out their opening layout. As she predicted, they crowded the one side and left the other completely open. Tony couldn't help but give an evil smile knowing what he was about to do to them. The crowds from both sides, plus those who didn't make the semis, were seated, waiting for the biggest game of the day to start. And start it did. Just as planned, Tony ran the entire length of the field on the one side, completely unnoticed by the other team, and shot out four of their five guys before the last guy managed to get him out. Right after Tony took those shots to the side, Justin came down the other side and bunkered that guy out while the other three brought the flag for the point. "The plan went nearly too perfect," Tony though to himself as they regrouped for the next point. He gave out the instructions for this point and yet again, Kennview scored within seconds, much to the delight of the crowd who quickly swung their fanship to them. The first match went like that for much of the game. The first game ended with the other head coach conceding the last point to eat out the rest of the clock. Kennview seemed unstoppable with the first game's score of 16 to 5. The next match went by with a little bit of a scare. For the first time in the tournament, Kennview found themselves behind at halftime 3 to 4. That scare was not to last though as they found and exploited Northwood's weak spots and ended their chances at victory with a 12 to 7 score. This was the first time in the league's history that a team went completely undefeated in the JV bracket. Never before have they seen a junior varsity team play with that much domination and determination to win a tournament. Not to mention the fact that they didn't win a single game last year; that just makes it even better for the media. Standing on the podium, holding the sponsors' banners and the cup over their heads, the kids couldn't help but yell out to their family and new fans. They hadn't noticed before, but as the day went by more and more people started watching their games and their domination over whoever stood in their way from where they now stand. Coach Wilson was crying while the ceremony continued and his kids had their pictures taken. Brittany, Brian, and Curtis felt their own sibling-like pride swelling up inside of them, watching their little brothers and sisters standing on the highest point of the stage. The Pros let them bask in the glory that they played their hearts out to achieve. They were playing out of their minds to get here and they can each remember their first time. Though it was already past eight, the coaches treated the kids to dinner out of their own pockets. He watched them do what they've been trained to do and they more than prevailed. To some, it seemed they were running a clinic when they were out there. Now was when the varsity team felt the pressure building as they still had their games to play tomorrow and they have no easy task set before them. Once again, Brittany did not sleep soundly; her dreams tainted by this recurring fear and doubt eroding away at the depths of her soul. Her nights have been filled with the dread of seeing Amanda's face when her eyes would close. The confusion of her entire situation was only more implanted by this feeling of being watched, even way out here. Brittany hasn't had a good night sleep since running into her, but didn't know why she felt this way. Even now, after being awake for most of the day and the long day of coaching and cheering for the younger team, she couldn't find the courage to sleep. Fatigue would occasionally overtake her exhausted brain and she would drift into a soft sleep, but it would only last for a few minutes at a time. Brittany kept her eyes trained on the clock as the night slowly passed by. Somehow, the wake-up call managed to startle her out of some kind rest as she bolted up from the comfort of her pillow. She glanced around the room trying to take it all in. None of it seemed familiar at first, but when she heard Tina snoring in the bed next to her it all came back. She got out of bed and woke her roommates Tina and Ashley while she proceeded to get some of her gear on and get her mind ready for today. Even as they drove to the field again, nothing seemed right. All of the talks going on behind her were shut off to her ears. Her own mother's voice couldn't be heard. Her mom had to shake her out of her daydream of nothingness. "We're here," she said shaking her daughter's shoulder, "you O.K. to play today? You look a little pale." "I'm fine mom," she answered smiling, "I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night." "I don't want her know," her mom answered, putting her hands up. "Was that a lesbian joke, mom?" she retorted almost laughing. "No," her mom answered sarcastically, "but do you want to hear one?" "Shut up mom," she said getting out of the van laughing. Brian, Curtis and Frank were already at the back unloading the gear into their wagon. Brittany got out, trying to push that ominous sight out of her mind, and went about her duties as one of the team captains. She organized the team under their canopy while they waited for the other teams to start showing up. Once again, they could hear the blowers inflating the fields to get ready for final day of the tournament. As they neared the teams' staging area, the JV squad burst into cheers. Hanging over the grandstand billboard was a banner of who won the JV tournament. Everyone suddenly felt their tensions dissolving away. "Alright, listen up!" Coach Wilson said after receiving the schedule. The teams were busy getting the starting line ready to go and all of the pods filled. "We are the first game of the day and we're playing Clemson High on center court. I don't need to explain to you what you need or need not to do. You trained the team that played yesterday and you saw what happened. Franklin, Steven and Craig said they'll be by later, after our first game, but not to worry. We know how to play paintball." The coaches chose Brittany's lines to start off the first few points and then they'll go from there. She led them out onto the field to a standing ovation after the national anthem was played. She looked into the crowd and saw her mom watching intently with one of the dads sitting next to her explaining the game, like he did yesterday. Brittany gathered her line around her and got them pumped and chanting before the other team even made out of the pits. She was in their faces, shouting at them to "keep their fucking guns rolling" or "blast their fucking faces off". "LISTEN UP!" she yelled at the line. Pointing to her heart she continued, "Remember what's in fucking here!" then she pointed to her head, "and remember what's in fucking here. You know how to fucking play this game and know we'll teach them how to fucking play. Come on mother fuckers..." her cries were drowned out by the cheering of her line. Her mother, on the other hand, could only grimace at her daughter's choice of words, but knew it's how she plays. The head ref announced the ten second warning. Brittany could hear the coaches and her other teammates calling out Crimson's plan of attack while she counted down the seconds in her head. Once he gave the signal to start the game, Brittany's line came out with a vengeance. Thomas was on their side of the field, shooting out players along the way, before their corners were filled. The point was over in less than twenty seconds. Brittany waved the flag over her head as she ran it in for the point. She could hear the ovation from their fans and the other teams in the stands. The rest of the half went by without a single point scored against them; they led by a ten point margin. All of the lines were playing just like they should be and none of Crimson's coaches could see any holes in their play. The second half went by without much of the flair that Kennview usually puts into their games. Instead they opted to slow down the game and wear them down, watching them impale themselves on their guns. Brian followed Brittany's lead by waving the flag over his head when he brought it in for the final point. Crimson High could only watch from the deadbox as he brought in the final hang. Coach Wilson had to look at the scoreboard to confirm the facts: they played a perfect match. Not a single point scored against them all game with the final score of 15 to 0. The varsity team gathered themselves under the canopy to regroup and get all of the information ready to play against their cross-town rival, Henderson High. They were looking really strong last year and what they saw of their JV team, their varsity team could give them a run for their money if they gave them any openings. Granted, they just seriously dismantled their real only competition, on center court at that, and set the pace for the rest of the tournament. Henderson was always kind of one of those sleeper teams, while Kennview was winning everything, they were always right there in the semi-finals with them almost every time. The Dynasty guys arrived at the field just as Kennview's next game got underway. They watched quietly in the stands while their good friend's line just pounded the other team, completely embarrassing them in front of their fans and TV cameras. Craig, who took a seat next to Brittany's mom by chance, continued to breakdown each point as they played it out. Steven kept talking her about what she did wrong when she got shot out, or what she did right when she was scoring points. Even though everyone expected the game to be close, Kennview made it worth the while of the TV stations to attend with their impressive display of dominance and sportsmanship. Franklin could only respect his friend's mother for raising her daughter to have that level of sportsmanship at such a young age. The four of them went down to congratulate them on their 13 to 8 victory and their place in the semi-finals. Brittany led her team through the opposition of McGregor High in two easy wins. Once again, Brittany found herself standing at the starting gate of the finals with her team and fans cheering her on. The entire line knows this feeling well, they've been here many times before. Though they've never played this team in the finals, they have always blasted them away whenever they met. She, and the rest of her line, could feel no life coming from the other side of the field, though they tried to get themselves pumped up. From the start of the first point, however, Kennview had their hands full. Northwood's varsity team obviously came here to win and they were battling with all they have. During their first half timeout, Coach Wilson expressed his deep regret for underestimating this team. They were matched point-for-point throughout much of the half. By the time the halftime whistle blew, Kennview had a weak lead of 5 to 3, their lowest scoring first half lead since this time last year. "This is what happens when you don't respect them enough," Coach Wilson said during the break. "They've been practicing hard all summer and now they're trying to show us what they're worth. I say: Fuck... That... Shit! We know who the better team is. They know who the better team is. Now we need to teach them a lesson in respect for the national champions. Brian, Greg, you guys need to keep pushing down your tape, regardless of what's going on on the other side. Make them remember the day they tried to keep us from the trophy." Brian led his line out for the first point of the second half. The came out firing on all cylinders. Within the first minute of the half, Kennview scored twice against what seemed like a strong team. Northwood made a valiant effort to fight back with a few quick points of their own, but the wind had died from their sails. By the time the game ended, it was clear there would be no last minute comeback in this game. Kennview laid back and wasted the rest of the clock when they got ahead 10 to 7. Their plan worked. The next game easily went to them as well. It was clear that fatigue was keeping Northwood from doing much and they seemed to have nothing left. Kennview rolled them in a complete 18 to 3 blowout for the win. Brittany stood atop the podium, holding the trophy over the heads of her teammates amidst the celebration. True to the tradition, she kissed the side of the cup and passed it down to the next person. She could hear all of the other teams and their family and fans cheering their names throughout the ceremony. Kennview High was awarded their individual medals and a check for five thousand dollars for their win and Brittany was given the event's Sportsmanship Award. Brian was named as the team's MVP for this event for being a clutch player in their tightest game. Brittany gave him his due hug and congratulations. The guys from San Diego Dynasty took their leave right after giving the teams and their coaches their due congratulations. After the awards ceremony, and media interviews, the teams continued their revelry while packing up their gear. After all of the gear and remaining boxes of paint were loaded, Coach Wilson gathered the team around before heading out. "Hey, no speeches!" he called out over the celebrating kids and parents. "I'm proud of you all. Your parents are proud of all of you. Your sponsors are proud of all of you, now let's get the hell back to town." On the ride out of town, Brittany all but forgot about Amanda and all the horror she brought to her; that is until she fell asleep. Two nights of virtually no rest and two days of playing and coaching paintball finally caught up to her. Before they were even on the highway, Brittany's lights were out. All of the excitement going on behind her and that in her head could no longer keep her body from demanding rest. Her dreams all seemed to run together in that illogic way that dreams often do. She was happy that her team won another national title, but felt saddened by a longing that could not be quenched. For what seemed like eons, what was were merely a couple of hours, she saw Amanda standing before her, covered by her hoodie to where only her lips are visible, trying to speak as if apologizing for their first encounter. In yet, despite her seemingly groundless fear in her dream, she cannot bear to hear any form apology from an abomination such as herself. When Amanda moves her lips to speak, Brittany hears a familiar voice that she can't place coming from behind her. When she began to turn around, she awoke and found they were turning into the school's parking lot. As she sat up, she heard her mother's voice telling her they've arrived back. Brittany realized who's voice it was calling out to her. Brittany could not recall any of the details of how she found her way back to her bed. She remembers her mother, or at least someone, kissing her goodnight and the next thing she knew she was lying in her bed facing the ceiling. After her long weekend and seemingly longer nap, her thoughts about this Amanda person had finally exhausted themselves. She could not picture Amanda in her mind nor did she want to. All she wanted was a decent night sleep because, after all, she had to go to school tomorrow and it was already three in the morning. After a tiring day at school, and a victorious weekend, the coaches decided to give the kids the day off from practice even though their next event is a "home game", by traditional sports' standards, and the pressure gets turned up even more for those. Almost all of the school attends these games even though they don't follow the sport that well, but despite so they come to support their national championship team. Brittany remembers all to well how hard the road gets as the season drags on. The training regiment intensifies by a factor of ten and the standards increase more and more as they see how they finish in each event. Brittany decided to take her day off to go down to the book store and search out Amanda. Throughout the course of the day, she built up her courage to finally go see her. She made her way to her car when Tina came up to her. "Hey Brit," she started with a smile, "where you going this afternoon? You wanna go get some ice cream or something?" "No actually, I'm heading down to the book store," she answered honestly. "Oh, do you mind if I go with you?" Tina asked politely, but a little disheartened. "There's something I need to look up." "Yeah," Brittany said smiling, "hop in." They rode and talked about yesterday's victory. Tina was only recently promoted to the varsity team and was the only one to play both days. Both of them reliving their moment on the podium. Tina got to brag about how she was on both podiums, but Brittany countered which one was better. Tina didn't bring up what was on her mind for the entire ride. When they arrived they saw Amanda getting her cello out to start playing. This seemed a little odd as she was already playing the first song of her set by now, but that thought quickly passed when Amanda got her fingers going. Brittany and Tina stood in front of the growing crowd that has quickly turned into a small fanbase. Brittany did not feel any of her recurring fear when she watched Amanda play, but rather felt eased by it. Tina, as well, was entranced by the sound coming from this girl's instrument. She subconsciously held Brittany's hand while they listened to her play her first set; Brittany never once noticed until the music ended. "Hey Tina," she said with a confused tone, "why are you holding my hand?" "Oh shit, I'm sorry, Brit," she answered blushing a deep crimson. After regaining her composure she continued, "Well, let's go inside and see if I can find what I'm looking for." "You go ahead on in," Brittany said, keeping her eyes on Amanda, "I'll be in a few minutes." "Oh... O.K. Brit," Tina answered lowering her eyes as she entered the store. All Tina could think about right now was their weekend that they spent together. And that kiss... yes that kiss last night before Brittany went home and the sound of her voice when she said "goodnight" made her growing confusion that much more frustrating. 'Why does she have to take over my feelings like this?' she kept thinking to herself. A short time later, Brittany appeared between some of the shelves looking through a few books about nothing in particular. Her eyes weren't even focused on the pages while she skimmed them. Rather she kept her thoughts about Amanda, but her revelry was short-lived as she was interrupted by a familiar voice. "Hello again, Brittany," Roger said happily. "Is there anything I can help you with today?" "Yes," she answered, putting the book back where she found it. "I think there's something I need in your office," she winked at him. "I see. Then follow me." Roger's voice was lower than before and his eyes less welcoming. He knows why she would ask of such a thing, but he didn't know exactly what this studious teenager will ask of him this time. "What can I answer today, my dear?" Roger asked politely taking a seat behind his desk. "Tell me more about Amanda," Brittany answered pointblank. "I don't know why but whenever I'm not playing paintball and when I'm not here she haunts my every thought. I was thinking someone who knows her better can tell me how or why." "I cannot answer that, but what I can say is this: you remind her of someone dear that she lost before I found her on my doorstep. I will not say now who that was, but she cries herself to sleep almost every night thinking of this person. Now I ask you, how does she know you?" "I don't know," Brittany asked, nearly insulted that she would know her from somewhere. "I've never seen her before in my life, but now I can't get her face out of my head." "Yes," Roger answered chuckling, "her face has become very unforgettable for what it is now. That's actually part of the reason why I didn't recognize her at first." He took a pause before he said too much. Brittany could tell by the sound of his voice that something was choking him up. "She speaks very highly of you, you know." "No she doesn't," she answered, again feeling a bit insulted. "Well, not exactly 'speaks', but since I rediscovered my sister, she hasn't been able to stop talking about you. Again, I will not tell you why right now; it's not my place to so..." Roger was interrupted by his phone ringing. "Excuse me, dear." Brittany sat confused by his newest outburst. She distinctly remembering him telling her that she has no siblings, at least not anymore, then he claims to be her brother. Brittany's concentration soon turn to fear as she watched his face go from a small smile to a maddening grimace when the voice on the other end started to speak. He was very upset by this person calling him for some reason and Brittany suddenly felt frightened to be in the same room as he. "NO!..... Amanda told you twice already she will not see you!... I don't care what the fucking protocol is!... Well, that's not my problem... Oh you just dare and try it, bitch..." with that he threw the phone down and only then realized Brittany was still in her seat. "I'm sorry you had to see that my dear. That Dr. Jackson has been calling me nonstop since she discovered Amanda was living here with me. Amanda told me that she wants nothing to do with that... what were the words she used?... 'cruel Medusa' I think." "Who is Dr. Jackson?" Brittany asked still frightened, but her courage remained with her. "She was Amanda's therapist when she was incarcerated..." "Amanda was what?" Brittany asked alarmed. Again she was hearing the truth, but didn't want to hear it. "Incarcerated where?" "Well if you really must know," he said evenly, "before our father's trial she was deemed fit to take the stand. After testifying, they re-evaluated her and then she told the shrink that she heard voices. Our father was given another trial, but was killed in a prison riot after only his third day on the inside. When they told Amanda that she didn't have to testify again because of that, they said she smiled and laughed like a 'girl at a birthday party'. Of course, she was only ten at the time, but the new law dictated that she be held in a juvenile center until her thirteenth birthday then she was moved to the Hillcrest Hospital of the Criminally Insane. She hasn't gone into much detail about it and I don't know what happened to her, but whatever it was fucked her up to where she lost the ability to speak when they released her." "Oh my God," Brittany felt her heart sink. She couldn't bring herself to imagine a thirteen year old girl being placed in an asylum, let alone what might have happened to her. The thoughts of what some lunatic might have done to her made her eyes begin to water. Brittany bravely held back her tears, however. "She hasn't said anything about it?" "No, only that she lost someone very precious to her," Roger said in a grievous tone. "Given how she talks to me, I always assumed that meant that she lost herself, but I don't know anymore." "I see," Brittany said, feeling her tears running down her face at the sight of his. "I think I'll leave now, O.K.?" "Yeah, that's fine, Brittany," Roger answered wiping away his tears. "I never did get your last name, by the way." "Williams," she answered over her shoulder as she opened the door. Roger just nodded his head as Brittany left him to his solitude. She continued her empty search for her book of nothing. The entire time she looked blankly at the shelves she could hear Amanda playing a soft tune, almost as if she knew what her and Roger just talked about. Brittany could take it no longer. Once she found Tina, she hastily made her buy whatever she needed and they left. Tina decided on the ride home to stay with her friend and find out what the hell was going on. ************************************* There's part three of the series. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Part four will be on a slight delay, but not to worry, I will have it out as soon as possible. Once again, comments and suggestions are always welcome. i want to thank those who have sent me their suggestions and comments so far. You've been a big help.