Date: Sat, 3 Mar 2001 22:03:04 -0000
From: Beverly Taff
Subject: Spacetran Part 1

The craft landed without any sensation of deceleration and I had to look
outside to convince myself it had actually landed on the moon.  The harsh
cruel outlines of the unweathered rocks and the black sky combined with the
fractional gravity to convince me I was definitely not on earth.

	'The whole thing must be true.'  I thought.  The whispered stories
about the rescued astronauts had until now been the stuff of mystery and
conjecture.  For nearly a month rumours had persisted from the space centre
until my boss finally gave me the go-ahead.

	"Try and get to the bottom of it Ruby.  See if there really is any
truth to these stories."

	Despite my best efforts, the staff at the space agency had remained
tight-lipped and I had all but given up until one bitter winter's night as
I stumbled home from my regular bar.

I now lived alone since the disastrous break-up of my last relationship.
It was hard enough coming to terms with my recently discovered bisexuality
but for my ex to go broadcasting it to the world was a betrayal that had
left me wounded and stunned.  Perhaps if he had been a bit less 'Macho' and
more understanding, I might have stayed with him.  For a year I had found
myself stumbling from one unsatisfactory lesbian relationship to another
until I had all but given up on sex altogether.  In the office I knew they
sniggered behind my back and called me 'The Ice Queen'.  I didn't care.  I
was hovering on the edge of suicide anyway and it wouldn't have taken much
to tip me over.

As I slipped and slithered on the icy steps of my porch, a feint eerie
light slowly enveloped me.  Looking up I had been stunned to see a weird
object hovering just above the tree-lined paddock behind my remote country
cottage.  The shock paralysed me for a moment until the object settled
silently in the field and a door appeared in its skin.  After gaping
stupidly for a few seconds I plucked up the courage to approach.  Whoever
was inside obviously meant me no harm.  If it was able to hover soundlessly
and land without any disturbance the occupants must be far advanced of
earth's civilisation and could have easily captured me if they had wished.
No, this was definitely an invitation.  All it needed was courage on my
side.  Cautiously I gripped the handle and inspected the little ladder as
my totally unsuitable heels teetered awkwardly on the rungs.  It seemed
secure so I pushed my bag through the door, hefted my skirt above my knees
and cautiously climbed in.  Immediately a female voice spoke softly.

	"D'you want to visit the moon?"

	It was a strange remark.  No introductions, none of the cautious
'first contact' formalities, just a stark simple question.  I stared around
nervously but found nobody.  I was obviously in some sort of 'cargo
compartment' for there was no sign of any controls, just another door in
front of me.  I knocked softly and tried speaking through the door.

	"Is there anybody there?"

	There was a short pause before the same voice replied.

	"Wait a minute."

	I was puzzled.  The voice seemed almost human.  In fact it was
definitely human.  I walked around the cargo hold and as I inspected the
compartment the voice spoke again.

	"I'll be ready in a moment but you haven't answered my first
question.  D'you want to go to the moon?"

The outer door was still open and it was obvious that my options were still
open.  I stuck my head out and considered the idea.  Thrilled with events I
didn't take much convincing and soon gave my answer.  To a science
correspondent the opportunity was unparalleled.

	"Yes.  OK.  The moon it is then"

	I had hardly finished my reply before the outer door shut.

	"Will you take a seat please?  It won't take long but you might be
nauseous as we warp out of here."

	A panel light came on beside the inner door and some illuminated
instructions became visible.  I pressed the one reading 'door' but nothing
happened so I pressed the one marked 'seat'.  A seat unfolded from the wall
so I made myself comfortable as the craft tipped gently and a soft hum
assuaged my ears.

	"Get ready."  Cautioned the voice and I secured the seat belt as
the hum intensified.

	There was no sensation of acceleration and I convinced myself we
were moving by looking out of a small window as the ground dropped away.
The hills receded then the horizon started to curve and before I realised
it, the dawn was forming a brilliant crescent as the sun appeared.  I knew
a lot about space travel; after all I was a science graduate so I realised
we must have moved a hell of long way very quickly to create such a sudden
sunrise.  I turned away for a moment and when I looked again the Earth was
already a shrinking orb.  There was still no sensation of acceleration and
yet there was a gravitational field inside the craft.  The whole experience
defied all the laws of physics so I moved to the other window only to find
the Moon already filling my field of vision.

'We were almost there for God's sake!'  I gasped.  'What sort of bloody
craft was this?'

	Stunned, I gaped at the rough lunar surface then felt a sudden
nausea, as my whole body lost weight.  The gravity had changed and I was
now only one sixth of my normal weight.  I wafted across to my seat and
stared at the view again.  'Yes.  I was definitely on the moon.  The
gravity reduction was a clincher'

Suddenly a low rumble warned me that the inner door was opening and I
whipped around not knowing what to expect.  Despite my best endeavours to
expect the unexpected I was still unprepared for the picture of loveliness
before me.

	"Sorry I didn't welcome you aboard just now.  I was having trouble
with my zip; it's got stuck.  Could you free it for me please?  I can't get
my dress on or off."

She turned around to expose a beautifully curved back and a delicate lace
bra that had tangled with the zip of a perfectly fitting cocktail dress.
Dumbfounded, I extended nervous fingers and freed the offending zipper as
she sighed thankfully.

"Thanks.  They always let you down at the worst possible moment don't they?
I didn't really want to meet you with my dress only halfway fastened.  I
tried to change it but I couldn't get it over my hips or shoulders.  I was
stuck"

	I gaped at the picture of loveliness and shook my disbelieving
head.  Any human girl would have died for such looks.  My lesbian heart
started to beat faster.

	"Where have you come from?"  I finally managed to ask.

	"Earth."

	"You're not trying to tell me your human."

	"I most certainly am- unfortunately."  She added as a soft
afterthought.

	I sensed a certain bitterness and studied the face.  It had stopped
smiling and turned to inspect some dials on what was obviously an important
central control panel.  As she readjusted some settings I spoke again.

	"Who are you then, and what the hell is this ship?"

	"I'm a human being, just like you, and this is my ship.  I call her
The Cold Albatross."

	"Cold Albatross?  That's a funny name."

	"It's not. We wander endlessly all over the universe and it's
bloody cold in deep space.  I think it's a wonderful name."

	"Who's 'we'?"

	"Just me and the Cold Albatross."  She explained patiently.

	"Who built it."

	"I did!"

	"Come off it!  This is right outside Earth's League.  We're still
lighting the blue touch paper and standing well back.  This thing is
quantum leaps ahead of Earth."

	"I think you've said enough.  Would you like to go back to Earth
now."

	I saw the hurt in her eyes and realised I had offended her.  I had
been unbalanced by events and got off to a terrible start.  I still found
it hard to believe she was human and wondered if she was some sort of alien
'morph'.  I voiced my suspicions and she gasped with shock.

	"Why you suspicious cow!  What the hell makes you think that?"

	"You could be some sort of alien trying to ensnare me."  I
repeated, still not convinced by her claims about the spacecraft.

	"If I was trying to ensnare you, I would have disguised myself as
some handsome hunk of masculinity."

I did a double take.  She was right. To all outward appearances, a man
would have been far more attractive bait.  Unless she was telepathic as
well, she obviously didn't know I was a lesbian so I decided to change the
subject.  Anyway, if she was an alien there was nothing I could do about it
stuck on the moon.  But then, going by the technology around me, there was
little more I could have done about it back on Earth.

	"Are you the same person who rescued the lost astronauts last month
when their space expedition turned to rat shit?"

	"Why?  Has someone else on earth built a proper spaceship?"

I realised it was stupid question.  The shuttle's computers had been
damaged by some solar activity and the expedition had missed the moon.  As
the shuttle hurtled away into deep space the astronauts had been given up
for dead and the whole world had gone into mourning.  Suddenly the space
agency had gone quiet about the incident.  After a few weeks rumours began
to surface that the crew had turned up again safe and sound on the deck of
a French aircraft carrier.  Only the astronauts and a few French navy
personnel had witnessed the unidentified craft gently deposit their wrecked
shuttle onto the flight deck before disappearing into the night sky without
a trace.

The incident had caused consternation and the ship's crew had been
ridiculed until the flight deck surveillance videos were presented to
support their claims.  The American and French Governments had worked
frantically to limit the damage with a news blackout but the rumours were
flying thick and fast.  The aircraft carrier was being kept out at sea
under the pretence of sea-borne operations.

The spacemen had never seen their rescuers for the unknown space ship had
somehow seized their crippled craft and brought it back to the safety of
Earth.  As far as they were concerned, little green men may have rescued
them.  I hugged myself to think of the uproar there when I returned with my
amazing scoop that their rescuer had been a single woman.  At least it
appeared that way.  I could see nobody else in the craft and there was only
one other door leading off from the cockpit.  I presumed it led to her
private quarters.  She caught me eyeing the door and moved protectively to
place herself between it and me.  Her actions surprised me.  'Why was she
afraid of me?  Surely she held all the aces?'

I glanced towards the pilot seat and raised my eyebrows questioningly.  She
nodded and I settled into its comfortable folds to explore the controls.
This seemed to relax her and she rested her butt against the right hand
console as I inspected the controls.

	"How fast can this thing go?"  I asked.

	"I don't think in terms of distance per unit time.  I use time
warps to cross the universe.

The concept of velocity is invalid.  If gravity is strong enough it can
warp space.  Then space can be twisted on itself and any distance is
reduced to zero.  If space is reduced to zero and time still has duration
them an infinite distance can be crossed in a finite time; or more
accurately, a finite distance can be travelled in an instant."

	She had lost me completely and I fingered the controls ignorantly
before speaking again.

"There doesn't seem to be much to it.  There are only these levers."

I twiddled the group of crude aluminium levers in front of me and she
gently reached out to restrain me.  The soft touch of her delicate feminine
fingers sent goose bumps up my spine.

"Uh, don't do that, there's no knowing where we could end up.

"Why?"  I asked puzzled by her unease.

"Well the travelling is easy.  It's the navigation that's a sod."

"How so." I asked intrigued.

"There's no bloody charts of the universe and I never know where I'll end
up."

"So how do you get around?"

"I have to reverse everything exactly to get back to the Sol system.  It's
easy going from A to B and back to A again.  The shit happens when you try
to go from A to B to C and then from C to A.  It's a warp across a warp and
my maths isn't up to it yet.  Nor is my computer for that matter, she
chuckled.  "I'm still compiling charts.  It's OK going back to a place I've
visited before though because the parameters don't change that much."

I could not believe my ears.  Here she was apologising for not
understanding a concept that the best brains on Earth hadn't even dreamt
of.  She realised that I had lost the plot so she smiled and simplified it.

"It's a bit like Christopher Columbus."  She grinned.  "When I set out I'm
not sure where

I'm going.  When I get there I don't know where I am, and I only learn
where I've been when I get back."

"And all on borrowed time."  I finished, parodying the usual last line
about money.

She smiled wanly and gently caressed the navigation console with her
delicate fingers.  It was almost like a lover's caress and she caught me
studying her behaviour again.  It was obvious that the ship meant a lot to
her.  Guiltily she lowered her eyes.

"She's my child, my only love and she's never failed me.  I'm very proud of
her."

"You've every right to be.  Would you like to tell me more about her."

"What?  So you could build another like her.  I think one crazy misfit
wandering the universe is enough, don't you?"

"I don't think I could even begin to fathom out how she works.  It would be
easier to write about you instead."

"No it wouldn't"

"Her curt denial and sudden change of demeanour intrigued me.  Here was an
enigma with something to hide."

"Why did you say misfit?"

"Who else would forsake humanity to wander the universe."

	"Forsake humanity?  What d'you mean?"

	"I left earth years ago.  Haven't been back since; at least, not to
set foot and meet other humans.

I fly by occasionally.  Those astronauts were damned lucky that I was
passing.  They must be bloody daft to go in to deep space without some sort
of proper drive system.  What the hell possessed them?"

I studied her curiously as she stared out of the cockpit windows at the
sterile lunar landscape.  The cruel glare didn't seem to bother her and the
harsh light emphasised her perfect form. I greedily savoured her curves for
she was a stunningly attractive woman who would have broken the heart of
every man on the planet.  It seemed a waste for her to have denied the men
of Earth her superb body and fantastic looks, not to mention her brain.
Men would have killed for her- 'and lesbians' I added as an afterthought.
She turned slowly and noticed me studying her.  It was obvious she had read
some of my thoughts.  Not my predatory lesbian ones though, she was still
too relaxed for that.

"Things aren't always what they seem you know.  You should never go by
appearances."

"Believe me I don't.  It's just that it seems such a waste.  What on earth
drove you away?"

	"People.  People on Earth drove me away.  It's an unfortunate
expression that isn't it?"

	"What is?"  I asked.

	"On earth- 'what on earth'.  I mean it's hardly relevant out here
in space is it?  It has a certain poignancy for me."

"Why?"

"Well I'll never go back.  I'll never set foot 'On Earth' again.  I'd like
to but I cant."

"Why not?"

	"You're full of questions aren't you?"  She parried.

	"It's my job.  I'm the science correspondent for the Free Thinker's
Journal."

	"So ask about science then.  There's plenty here to keep you busy.
Take a space suit and go for a moonwalk.  Take some photographs if you
like."

	"Nobody would believe me.  I mean just look at the set up here.  A
single gorgeous woman in a little black cocktail dress piloting her own
space ship and wandering around space rescuing stranded spacemen.  It's
beyond science fiction I think you'd agree."

A brief frown clouded her features and she made as if to speak then thought
better of it.  It was obvious there was something bothering her.  An
oppressive silence spread around the little cockpit and she fidgeted
nervously with her delicate tiny hands.  Eventually she glanced towards me
again and edged towards the other door.

"I'm not being very hospitable am I?  Would you like coffee or something?"

"That would be nice."  I replied with my girlish curiosity aroused and
anticipating a peek into the forbidden inner sanctum.  She pressed a panel
with her hand and the door eased back.  I had a brief glimpse of an
apartment devoted to a woman who spent a lot of time attending to her
appearance.  Four of the five walls were mirrored and I suspected I was in
the presence of a female narcissist.  The door closed immediately behind
her and I was denied any further study of the details.

I was left alone to gaze absently at the ships' controls and wonder at the
awesome genius that had put the whole thing together.  Eventually the door
slid back again and she emerged with a tray of cookies and coffee.  She had
also changed her dress to a more provocative number and I wondered if she
suspected something about me.  I was certainly feeling tempted.

"There's a pull-out flap under the left hand console."  She smiled.

I reached under and tugged the plastic shelf then she carefully set down
the tray.

	"So what do you think of her then?"

	"What?  The space ship?"

	"What else?"

	"It's amazing.  How on earth does it all work."

	"The theory's easy it's the engineering that nearly killed me."

	"Do tell."

	"I worked out that gravity is a function of the electron vibrations
that exist inside the atoms when they combine to make matter.  In an
ordinary state these atoms are each acting like individual entities and
vibrating to their own script.  Each element has it's own frequency but
each individual atom is resonating to it's own personal cycle.  All I did
was create a precise atomic crystalline super-conductive amalgam of
elements with individual atoms precisely arranged so that the atomic
frequencies would run in exact coincidental sequence.  It's like billion
sine waves being turned into a straight line when AC is rectified into DC.

The less ripple there is the more efficient the concentration of gravity.
I shaped the amalgam into a thick twisted ring to close the gravitational
loop.  All it needs then is a current of a precise frequency and the
gravity is concentrated into an infinitely dense circular coil.

Any space and therefore any matter that comes within a perpendicular axis
through that field is immediately warped into a doughnut spiral and turns
in on itself.  I use that corrupted space to move Cold Albatross from one
end of the closed spiral to the other."

She hesitated then sipped some coffee and nibbled daintily at a cookie as I
shook my aching head.  The whole idea was way beyond me.  God alone knew
how she had dreamt up the idea let alone built an engine and a ship to
exploit it.  I fumbled with my hidden tape recorder and she grinned as the
metallic click betrayed my secret.

"Don't worry I'm not about to give away any important secrets.  The
principle alone took me two years to develop."

"Where did you build the ship?"  I asked.

"On Earth; in a farmer's barn.  He let me indulge my whim - for a price
mind."

"Some whim.  It must have been a big barn."

"It was a big price."  She countered.  A shadow clouded her face and she
shuddered momentarily.

'There goes that secret again'.  I thought.

"Why don't you come back to Earth?  You know the planet's becoming
overcrowded.  This ship could save the whole human race."

	"What!  And let them spread like vermin throughout the universe?
No thanks; I value my independence and freedom.  It's cost me enough to
achieve it.  Besides, what about other intelligent life forms out there?
You know what humanity's record is like.  -If it moves kill it-."

	"You don't like your fellow man do you?"  I sighed.

	"No."  She almost whispered.

	"Why not?"

	"I had a pretty shitty childhood- a nightmare in fact.  I've
nothing to thank humanity for."

	I sensed we were getting to the nub of the issue.  There had to be
some reason why she had suddenly decided to reveal herself to me and
subsequently, the rest of humanity.  She could have ignored the astronaut's
desperate fate and passed by on the other side of the sun.  Nevertheless,
despite whatever axe she had to grind with mankind, her natural mothering
instincts had forced her to play the Good Samaritan.

	"You want to talk don't you?  You want to get it off your chest?"

	She fell silent and turned again to stare out of the cockpit
window.  The sun was fully risen and the harsh brilliant sunlight was
beginning to hurt my eyes.  It didn't seem to affect her but I was forced
to turn away from the window.  She sensed my discomfort and half turned to
press a console button. A dark visor descended over the cockpit window and
my eyes relaxed again.  I turned to study her sensuous back and after a
long silence I noticed

her shoulders heave. She was crying silently.  Unsure what to do I gently
put my arm around her shoulder and whispered.

"What's wrong?"

The sobbing stopped and she slumped onto a small built in divan that lay
beneath the

cockpit window. It was obviously designed for space watching.  The
mini-dress rode up to reveal her stocking tops and she tugged modestly at
it before turning to face me.

As she dried her eyes there was no smearing of makeup and I peered
curiously only to realise she wasn't wearing any.  Her red lips and colour
tones were natural.  I was about to ask about it but she sighed and stared
out into space again with a look born of ages.

"Now you've got the scientific theories I suppose you want the woman's
angle?  The girl

behind the pilot."

I hesitated uncertainly before cautiously expanding the theme.

"I'd like the whole story, who you are, where you came from, how on earth
you came to

achieve all this stuff."

She stared for a long moment at the floor then started softly.

"You won't like what you hear.  It's a pretty disgusting story."

"Try me.  I've hit some pretty awful lows in this game."

She shrugged, drew a long breath and slowly started talking.

"I'm much older than I look.  By your Earth time I'm over fifty but
physically I'm still in my

early twenties.  Time and space travel plays funny tricks on your body."

"Carry on."  I said, realising she was somehow trying to prepare me for
something worse.

"I don't think you really want to hear the rest."

	"I do.  Everything; warts and all."

"OK then.  Don't say I didn't warn you.  I'll use third person, it's not so
painful for me."

I had done a bit of Psychology during my studies at college and recognised
her attempt to avoid the hurt and guilt by transference.

	"Go on."  I encouraged.  "I'm not a judge or a jury."

	And so she laid it on my ear.