Date: Tue, 26 Jan 1999 21:53:53 -0000 From: Paul1954 Subject: Double Dare Double Dare by Paul1954 Part 1 - The Bet Friday 20th September, 2005 - 8:50pm Flight BA212 - Baltimore, Washington to Heathrow, London Matthew McDonald sat looking at his hands, not quite believing he had agreed to the bet that he had accepted from his sister. He stretched out his fingers and examined the coral nail varnish and the narrow white gold ring on the middle finger of his right hand. It was most probably just as well that he was completely unaware that, to anyone looking at him, it would have seemed like a typically feminine gesture made by a pretty girl. His eyes strayed down to the short dress that finished only 4" above the knees. This covered topped the sheer, almost bare, black pantie-hose and the fine black sling-backs that adorned his legs. He winced a little at the sight of the matching coral nail-varnish that decorated his toenails. He wasn't sure exactly how he felt at this moment! He was a little upset, for reason's he really didn't want to face, and felt threatened by his own confused feelings, he had not expected to pass as a girl so easily and after so little preparation! His trip to the airport had been his first in public 'en femme' and he had been sure that everyone was going to stare and point at him and that he would be exposed. He hadn't even expected to get out of the hotel and had, if he was being honest with himself, been banking on his mother spotting the charade immediately. It would have been worth the forfeit, he realised, to put him out of this agony! He very nearly blew it the minute that he left the hotel as he got into the car waiting to take them to the airport. He had gone in feet first and nearly fell over as he tried to ease his exposed legs into the back seat. His legs had parted and given his sister a free show, which caused her a lot of amusement, and he only just managed to recover before his mother arrived at the other side of the car. The rest of the trip had been uneventful and he had avoided making conversation with his mother which she had accepted, thinking the 'she' was obviously too upset to talk much. Well, he had expected to be stared and pointed at and, Oh! he had been stared at alright, but only in a way that made him feel acutely uncomfortable! He now knew the less than subtle scrutiny that women gave to each other as he felt himself being constantly checked out by his 'sisters'. This was something that he had never really noticed before but, because he was so nervous at being 'read', he had noticed every little glance he got. The other type of staring made him even more uncomfortable! He had attracted considerable attention from any male that had even halfway looked in his direction and this sort of attention made him feel exposed and vulnerable. It was like looking down the barrel of a hunter's gun. He had been used to being the hunter, not the hunted, and this proved to be a sobering experience for him. Maybe all men should try this, at least once, he thought! It might make them understand exactly how a girl feels and, maybe, make them re-evaluate the way they acted towards them! He was certainly going to try to change his attitude when he changed back to his male persona, he determined, although deep down he knew that a leopard never changes it's spots. He knew that he was never going to go through this again, whatever the reason. This was a one-off that he had been suckered into like a nave fool! He was still regarding himself critically, despite his success so far. It still seemed to take a constant effort to keep his legs together despite the gaff that held his penis tightly back inside his legs. He felt quite tired now; tired from the strain of maintaining this constant charade and he would be glad when he got back to Sussex and could return to being himself again. He looked across the aisle at his mother - she was already sleeping but that didn't surprise him - she could sleep in the middle of a battlefield! He turned to his right to see his sister and flushed a little as she grinned at him. She had short brown hair, cut in a mannish style, and was wearing the same stylish cut blazer and trousers that he had purchased from his Regent Street tailor just one week before. The stewardess leaning across him interrupted his thoughts. "Can I get you anything Miss" she said with the practised smile that airline crew wear like a badge of pride. He wasn't aware that the level of attention he was receiving was anything unusual - he always travelled First Class. What did seem different was the lack of any sexual undercurrent that usually accompanied the offer of help from an attractive and young female. "Uh no thanks, I'm fine right now" he said in a soft soprano voice and put the complimentary eye shades back over his eyes and inserted the ear plugs he found in the light pink vanity bag they had given him. He would try and sleep the rest of this six-hour trip, the less he spoke to his mother, the less chance he had of giving himself away. As he settled back to relax he thought back to how he had ended up like this, dressed and impersonating his sister. He was one of a pair of identical twins borne to John and Elizabeth McDonald, identical that is, apart from the small matter of their gender. When they were smaller, nobody could have told them apart they were so similar. The tragedy was that they never really knew each other after those early days, their parents each took custody of a child following an acrimonious and bitter divorce. The twins were the only part of the divorce settlement that was evenly shared as Matthew stayed with his mother and Tamara lived with her father. Matthew definitely ended up with the better deal as his mother managed to retain her inherited money, coming from a wealthy family. Tamara was less lucky. Their father had no real money of his own and, due to the well-publicised affair he had with a 'B' movie actress, was left virtually penniless. Matthew and his mother had remained in the family estate in Sussex, in the South of England, but his father had taken Tamara back to Edinburgh to return to his family. His fierce Scottish pride had led him to refuse any offers of money that his ex-wife made to make their lives, mainly Tamara's life anyway, a little easier. This upset Elizabeth but there was nothing she could do about it and tried to bury her grief at losing her only daughter. Matthew's life had, so far, been a bed of roses. He had received every advantage that his mother's money, and her good connections, could have given him. He had left University at twenty-one and walked straight into owning his own business, courtesy of his mother. It was a 'can't fail' advertising agency where he only employed the best creative consultants, money was no real object, and had achieved instant success. Within a year the business was virtually running itself and Matthew had more than enough time to indulge in one of the real passions in his life, managing a Touring Car Racing team. The silver spoon, that seemed to reside permanently in his mouth showed no sign of tarnishing as his team, sponsored by his mother of course, was soon successful enough to obtain independent financial backing from a top brand beer company. He was constantly pictured with a beautiful girl, usually blond, on his arm but had recently become serious over one particular model, Katrina, who was now his regular girlfriend and the other passion in his life. There were even rumours that an engagement was going to be announced soon. * * * * * * * * * * * * Tamara's life was as different from this as it could get. Her father struggled to get any regular employment and she received only the most basic of educations that the state provided. She left school as soon as it was legal to do so without any qualifications whatsoever and soon entered a series of menial jobs. The latest job was that of a clerical assistant in a small firm of accountants. There had never been any discernible bitterness on her part, her father had loved and protected her from any publicity and, living in Edinburgh, they were shielded from the glare of publicity that surrounded Elizabeth and Matthew. Last month her father had enjoyed a small win on the Lottery and had decided to indulge both Tamara and himself by taking a trip to Washington - they had relations in Baltimore and he had always wanted to visit there. It was while they were there that her father was mugged and critically injured. He had too much to drink one night and had ended up in the wrong part of town still carrying what was left of his winnings. Two days after that incident he died leaving a distraught Tamara to cope with her loss. * * * * * * * * * * * * Word of her ex-husbands death soon got back to Elizabeth McDonald and she decided to fly out to Washington, along with Matthew, to see if she could help Tamara and to try and re-build the bridges that had been broken so many years ago. Neither she, nor Matthew, had seen Tamara for over fourteen years now! They re-united with Tamara as soon as they reached the hotel that had been arranged for them all. After trying to console Tamara in her grief, Matthew felt nothing for the father he had never known, they settled down and took stock of themselves. They were all shocked at how very much alike the twins still were and how, despite growing up apart from each other, they had changed very little. If they had been of the same gender, they would have been indistinguishable from each other and Matthew felt a little uneasy, when he realised this was more down to clothes and make-up rather than anything physical. Oh sure, Tamara had slightly wider hips, slighter more refined shoulders and her hair was longer but that was about all (apart from the generous bust-line she possessed)! Their faces were virtually identical apart from Tamara having slightly fuller lips and brighter eyes; Matthew had always sported a narrow jaw-line. He also had slender arms and hands, with very little muscle development. That was the reason why he had managed a Touring Car Team rather than participate as a driver - he could never acquire the upper body strength needed to control a twisting car driven at high speeds, despite spending a fortune at the gym! Tamara was pleased to see her brother again, she had long speculated on how he might have turned out, and bore him no real grudge. There was a little lingering resentment about how he had everything so easy, especially in comparison to how she and her father had struggled to keep solvent, but she was sensible enough to realise that this wasn't down to Matthew. She found it much harder, though, to deal with her mother. Her dislike of her, fed by stories from her father, bordered on hatred but she didn't want to fall into the trap of becoming hard and embittered and tried to make an effort to block out the years of her recognised resentments. Deep down though, she could not rid herself of the feelings of abandonment and rejection - how could a mother ever give up her own daughter for whatever the reason? She would never understand why she hadn't fought harder to keep her children together! These feelings were not intended to be critical of her father, he had done everything within his power - apart from accepting his ex-wife's charity - to provide for her and she had loved him deeply for that. It just signified the gulf between her and her mother, a gulf, she believed, that could never be bridged! Her father had been buried in Washington - Tamara had no need to bring him home, as he would always live forever inside of her head. She considered the body to be merely a shell, and she took up her mother and Matthew's offer to stay on in Washington with them for a few days. This was mainly to give herself a chance to get to know Matthew better. They had got on well from the start and had managed to cross the years they had been separated with an ease that surprised them both. To her regret, Elizabeth had failed to forge a new bond with her daughter. She accepted that her own strong will, the same strong will that was much in evidence within her own daughter, along with the history between them would ever prevent this happening. Tamara had refused any offer of financial help with a curt statement "I have managed this far without your help and, however hard it may prove to be, I think I will still manage on my own". She did this out of a sense of loyalty to her father but also because she did not want to be beholden to her mother for anything. Elizabeth was both proud and disappointed at how strong her daughter was and knew that, indeed, she would cope! The growing ease and familiarity that Matthew and Tamara felt led to regular bouts of friendly banter between them and this led, one day, to a bet - or dare - that would lead to permanent, and unimaginable, changes to the both of their lives. They were still a little shocked at the physical similarity between them and Tamara knew that Matthew felt a little threatened by this, much to her amusement. A friendly argument had led to a point where Tamara responded with a challenge that they were so alike that with a change of clothing, and also a little work on his appearance, that she was sure that Matthew could have passed for her! As she expected, Matthew merely scoffed at her suggestion and, snorted in derision when she suggested that she would have no problem at passing as him. An evil glint appeared in Tamara's eyes as her challenge started to grow into a full blown dare. She knew that he got irritated by the fact that she preceded him by a mere fourteen minutes, that had been one of her many interesting discoveries over the last couple of days, and she was going to use all of her armoury in an attempt to provoke him. "What's the matter little brother" she needled him as she watched his eyes harden, "are you so unsure about your own masculinity that you're afraid to put on a frock?" Ouch, that hurt! She could see that she had scored with her first blow. "W .. what .. I .." he stuttered and blustered in a poor attempt at a repost. She pressed home her early advantage before he could think straight. "And do you think that you're soooo .. big and tough that a poor little old girl like me couldn't pretend to be a big strong man like you?" she continued as she ran her delicately painted fingers down his chest and lowered her head to look through her fluttering, and mascara'd, eyelashes at him. She had needed to do this, as she was slightly taller than him now in her 2" heels. He had no real answers for her and just blustered, making futile denials and protestations, and making the almost childlike claim that he wasn't scared of anything! She knew that she now had him over a barrel and circled in for the kill! And as it has ever been, since time began, another man was manipulated by the 'weaker' sex into acting as she desired by uttering just a few, well chosen words proving that the pen, or in this case the voice, is indeed far mightier than the sword! "Well if you're so sure about that then I dare you to prove it, go on - let me just see you put your money where your mouth is!" she said aggressively with her slender jaw sticking out and her hands placed firmly on her hips. "Wha.. what do you mean?" he questioned nervously, realising for the first time that she had forced him on the defensive and had him hooked. She started to reel him in. "What I mean Matthew, is that we should put this to the test. You can take my place and I will take yours". "Bu .. but" he spluttered helplessly like a fish desperately seeking water. "Well come on then, are you prepared to have a go at this? Go on, I bet that just haven't got the balls to do it have you - or rather you have but maybe you shouldn't have eh!" she said and started laugh at her own weak joke. He was still hesitating a little, despite the jibes until she finally said, "Come on little brother. I dare you! Let's make it interesting and have a bet or are you chicken?". That was it! He could never refuse a dare and found it even harder to turn down a bet. "ALL RIGHT, Okay then you're on" he said as Tamara squealed and jumped in the air clapping her hands. * * * * * * * * * * * * It was later the next day that Tamara and Matthew sat in her hotel room dressed in their everyday clothes. A casual observer would have seen an attractive young couple preparing for a night on the town. The girl sat in front of the mirror that topped the vanity table, and looked critically at herself. She was wearing a little black dress, barely black tights and black court shoes. A thin gold necklace and a pair of matching earrings completed the picture. The young man wore a white long-sleeved shirt, a smart blazer, and an expensive looking pair of pants and brown suede shoes. He looked pleased with himself as he pulled at his blazer sleeve making sure his cuffs protruded at the correct length. "Well I think I make a pretty convincing picture, what do you think?" the man said with a deep timbre to his voice as he looked in the full-length mirror on the back of the cupboard door. The girl turned around and looked him up and down. "I've got to give it to you Tamara, I would never have believed it possible but I'm beginning to think I might be on to a loser here" she said in a soft soprano voice with just a hint of a Scottish accent. "I think you're right. I'm really impressed with your commitment to the cause, though I never thought you'd go this far," Tamara said as she looked at his smoothly shaven legs and pierced ears. The most impressive part of his costume however, was the realistic looking cleavage that he now sported. Tamara had been amazed when she first saw these and had, at first, thought he had breast implants inserted. Surely he wouldn't have gone that far! The truth was a little less stunning but, none the less, still surprised her. It certainly demonstrated how keen he was to win, or maybe he was keener not to lose their bet. He had, that very morning, visited a recommended cosmetic surgeon and had been injected with a water based gelatine substance behind his natural breast cavity. The gelatine had mixed with his natural body fluid and had swelled out to give him the equivalent of a 36C size pair of breasts. He had been assured that they would only last like this for a week before the gelatine compound started being absorbed back into his body, but that would be more than enough for his purposes. A little exercise would soon restore any stretched skin that remained. His painted finger went to his ear and played with an earring as he looked at his made-up face in the mirror. Although the head turned as he moved, and the mouth opened in time with him as he made an 'O' shape with his lips, he still found it hard to believe that he wasn't looking at his sister! The human hair shoulder length wig mimicked Tamara's hair perfectly in both colour and shape, and he had it tightly secured by having it woven into his own hair. She had helped him style it for the first few times until he was able to do it for himself. He considered the terms of the bet with a little annoyance, mainly annoyance at himself! He knew that he was now fully committed to this impersonation if he wasn't to miss out on one of the loves of his life! The agreed bet was that Matthew would impersonate Tamara for the trip back to England in three days time. This would give him plenty of time to prepare himself. If he could remain undetected during their trip then Tamara would swallow her stubborn pride and live with Matthew and her mother for the next six months. He thought that this would be a win, win for him as he felt that he had re-discovered another part of himself and didn't want to lose that! It might also give her the chance to get over the prejudice she held towards their mother - he was sure that, once she got to know her better, she would see that their separation wasn't all their mother's fault. If he was 'read', or found out, it in this charade, then he would have to give up managing his racing team and give the money to charity. She had managed to get him to agree to this by, again, daring him - some people never learn! He now knew that his impersonation would have to be very convincing, convincing enough to fool even his own mother, and he didn't really know if he truly believed it was possible! Oh yes, if even his mother spotted the charade then he would pay the forfeit! Tamara would, of course, have to play Matthew's role but she was confident she could carry it off. As he looked at her he knew she had been right! The make-up and clothes had given Matthew a convincing feminine appearance. Much harder to mimic would be the voice and he was convinced, at first, that this is where he would be exposed. He was not a quitter however and had, that very day, found contacts that would provide him with a throat spray that would give his voice the pitch and softness of a female for a period of eight hours. Money could work wonders if you let it! It had taken a little practice but less than six hours later he had managed to produce a good facsimile of his sister's voice, the accent had taken only a little more effort. He also managed to get a male version of this spray for Tamara and asked her to use it. He needed her to be successful if he was to pull this off! She had also had her hair cut to resemble his natural style; she certainly was doing her utmost to succeed. He had been a little surprised at how helpful she had been in making him look convincing, after all - she was helping him to win his bet - but she explained this by saying that she had a no hope job with poor pay and had little to lose. If she had to move into the family home again for a while - well, she could live with that! * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 2 - Winner Takes All The remainder of the flight went smoothly and everyone just accepted Matthew and Tamara for who they appeared to be. Matthew's heart fluttered a little when they were stopped as they went through customs, especially when he presented his sister's passport to the officials, but they were waived through with no further checks. He hadn't even considered, prior to the trip, that there might have been the possibility of a full body search being made on him, or even on his sister, and a cold chill ran down his spine at the thoughts of his exposure and the publicity this would have generated! Tamara had sailed through her own impersonation with a swagger and seemed to enjoy the reversed roles immensely. Their mother had never realised that her children had swapped places. Tamara had kept her distance a little, fearing that her mother's greater familiarity with Matthew would allow her to spot any anomalies with her behaviour. Matthew was less confident about fooling her but Elizabeth had put any strange behaviour down to Tamara's recent bereavement and the knowledge that she really didn't know her at all anymore! They had been collected from the airport and driven back to the family mansion on an unusually quiet drive down the M25 and M23 motorways on a misty, autumnal Saturday morning. As the car door was opened for him Matthew sniffed the air and drank in the heady aroma of a crisp, and slightly damp, English morning. He had always loved that evocative aroma of smoke and the coolness of the early morning mist that always hung in the air, as the first fallen leaves were either rotting, or being burnt. It made him long for the early morning practise sessions around Thruxton racetrack that he enjoyed so much! He had almost forgotten that he was still in disguise, his thoughts taking him elsewhere, and he was jolted back to reality as his butler, Clarkson, held out a hand to him and held Matthew's white gloved hand. "Can I help you Miss?" he asked politely as he took my weight as my legs swung around. Matthew's exit from the car was far more graceful than his entry in Washington had been and, for the first time, he actually enjoyed this charade as he wondered what Clarkson would have thought if he had known who he really was helping out of the car! It was a relieved Matthew that finally flopped down in the guestroom that had been made ready for Tamara. The travellers had all gone to their rooms to freshen up before enjoying a late breakfast. He removed Tamara's clothes and went to the bathroom to have a really good soak and to start removing every last trace of his disguise. The only thing that wouldn't disappear, for now, were his newly acquired breasts. He would have to bind these for a couple more days until they were absorbed. They still seemed to be as firm as when they were first created and, as he cupped them and felt their weight, he had to admit that he might even miss their jiggling and swaying for a while, after he got back to normal! The first sign that all was not well was when he found that he couldn't take his wig off. He pulled at the hair and tugged where he thought the loose weaves had been inserted. Shit! What was he going to do now? He looked around for some clothes to wear but found that only Tamara's cases had been left in his room. He saw exactly what he had expected to see as he opened up her cases to find them all full of dresses, lingerie and other female items of apparel, why should he have expected to see anything else! Realising that he didn't have any of his own clothes to wear he wrapped a white bath towel around himself. He felt ridiculous as he made sure to tuck it around his bosom as he had seen so many of his girlfriend's do in the past - what on earth had made him get himself into this mess! He wrapped another towel around his head to hide his longer hair, and poked his head around the doorway to make sure that nobody was coming. Seeing that the coast was clear, he crept across the hallway towards his own bedroom. He rapped gently on the door and gently called out "Tamara, Tamara - it's me Matthew" but got no answer. He repeated the exercise with the same result. He moved quickly back to Tamara's room and considered his options for a moment. They seemed to be pretty limited from where he was standing and he looked to see if there were any scissors available - at least then, he could get rid of this hair! His thoughts were cut short by the phone ringing, and he removed the towels as he walked across to answer it - he felt so stupid looking like some shy girl! As he answered it his voice started to break. This would have been alright if was replying as Matthew which is how he had planned it, but he was answering Tamara's phone in Tamara's room. To the rest of the world he was Tamara. "Tamara . . are you Okay, you sound a little horse?". Damn, it was his mother! "Ye .. yes thank you, I'm fine. Flying always affects me like this, it must be the air they always re-circulate through the system" Matthew replied struggling to maintain Tamara's high-pitched voice. "Then we look forward to seeing you shortly. Matthew is already down here and feeling hungry, will you be long?". Matthew .. downstairs - what the hell did she think she was doing - what was Tamara playing at? He guessed that this wasn't any accident. Tamara had known that he had won the bet and was now getting her pound of flesh by extending the joke a little. Well, he really had no choice! He only had her clothes and knew that they consisted entirely of skirts and dresses. He had seen her wearing pants in Washington so she must have deliberately packed them elsewhere, confirming that she must have set this up deliberately! He resigned himself to continuing the charade, and had to admire Tamara's cheek as he started to assemble what he needed to wear. His many practice sessions in Washington had paid off and he was able to dress, and make himself up, in just under the hour. He had changed into a mid-thigh length maroon dress that was casual and comfortable as well as complimenting his brunette hair. It was too much work to change the nail-varnish and lipstick to match and he could not be bothered, still feeling annoyed at Tamara's deception. A quick spray of the voice altering solution followed by a quick test to make sure he still sounded like Tamara, and he walked down the stairs, through the hallway and into the lounge. Elizabeth and Tamara were already waiting and were drinking some fresh orange juice. He felt his legs tremble a little when he saw their neighbours sharing a drink with them. "At last, I will never understand why women take so long to get ready. Just what is it that you do?" Tamara said to him in mock surprise, tongue lodged firmly in cheek. Matthew was fuming. How dare she make a fool of him this way! Tamara led him over to his neighbours and introduced him to them. He prayed to the heavens that he could maintain his disguise as they traded small talk for a few minutes. It was a few minutes after this that Tamara walked over to Matthew and put his arm around his maroon clad shoulders. "Well, I just thought I'd tell you that we're off now. Tamara was keen to return home as soon as possible and, if we hurry, we can catch the next shuttle to Edinburgh from Gatwick". Matthew was completely speechless as Tamara turned towards him with a gleam in her eye as she continued. "I've had your things packed again sis, now you'd better say your goodbyes and we can get off - we don't want to miss our flight!". Matthew was swept along like a twig in rapids, totally out of control and following whichever way the current swept him. There was nothing that he could do without exposing his real identity and his pride wouldn't allow that! His mother had shaken his hand goodbye, displaying no sign of any intimacy, and he had been led into the waiting car that headed towards Gatwick. He glared at Tamara as she sat next to him in the back seat, but could elicit nothing from her except a large grin and a teasing hand on his exposed thigh, which he slapped away. He couldn't afford to have the driver overhearing their conversation so he kept quiet until the reached the airport and wondered what would happen to him now! It wasn't until Tamara had paid for their tickets, using his credit card as well - the nerve, and they were sitting alone in the Club Class lounge, that Matthew finally got the chance to talk to her. He exploded. "What in heavens name do you think you are playing at" he growled at her in a loud hissing voice. "I was going to meet Katrina tonight, and instead I'm sitting in the First Class Lounge of an airport waiting for yet another damn flight - this time to your 'Bonny Scotland'. Why are you doing this?". Despite his obvious annoyance she couldn't help smiling at him in that playful, yet lascivious and mischievous way, that he was fast becoming accustomed to! "I couldn't resist it, you looked so cute and sexy I just had to have you to myself a little longer" she said in a suggestive manner. Whatever he had expected it had not been this. He was sitting with his sister, wearing a dress and heels and fiddling with his handbag. He felt so ridiculous that his anger dissipated like the air out of a burst balloon. He could nothing else but laugh at her outrageous behaviour and hugged her as he realised how much he had missed her over the years. The feelings that he was now experiencing were like a revelation to him. It was like discovering a whole new part of yourself, and he realised that without Tamara he had never, truly, been whole. He now knew that his current predicament was a small price to pay for discovering her again and he felt tears running down his face, smearing his mascara in the process. He wasn't sure if his tears were from laughter or from joy, probably a mixture of both, what's more he didn't care! Tamara pulled his head back and kissed him gently as she wiped away his tears with a tissue. "Go on Matthew, you'd better go and tidy yourself up, your make-up's running. Oh, and don't be long - the flight will be called any minute now". He laughed, he had never expected to hear such a thing said to him! He found the ladies restroom and cleaned his face and re-applied his make-up until he looked presentable to himself and returned to the lounge as the flight was called. He realised that he was looking forward to spending a few days with Tamara again but resolved to buy some clothes for himself - his days of pretending to be a female were coming to an end - or so he thought! * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 3 - The Trip to Whoever Saturday 21st September, 2005 - 16:45pm Flight BA BA2450 - London, Gatwick to Edinburgh There was no real First Class in the 737, just a curtained off area to give the illusion of exclusivity, but Matthew and Tamara sat there all the same, courtesy of Matthew's AMEX Gold card. They took no notice as the stewardesses went through the usual emergency procedures for the sixty minute journey and were relieved when the aircraft finally lined up on runway 8L after, what had seemed, an interminable period of time. It didn't matter how many times that Matthew flew, he still got a buzz from the sudden burst of acceleration as the 737 attacked the runway. The aircraft quickly grabbed at the sky and continued Eastwards, climbing to eighteen hundred feet before starting to bank left for the heading that would take it east of London on it's journey north. It was as the aircraft started to turn that it first gave a slight shudder and the passengers hands gripped the seat arms nervously, fearing that something had gone wrong. Everything seemed to happen quickly after that and desperate screaming filled the air along with the pungent smell of electrical burning as the pilot tried to prevent the aircraft going into a stall. Twenty seconds later flight BA2450 plunged to the earth, just four miles from the airport, slicing through a thick copse of woodland before ending up in two parts. There were few survivors, and these had all been in the front part of the aircraft where the cockpit, and the two rows of seats behind it, had separated from the main body of the aircraft. The survivors were lucky, if anyone could have called their experience lucky, that they had ended up thirty feet away when the full fuel tanks caught alight. Nobody, that was still alive after the initial impact, could have survived the conflagration that followed as the fireball lit the sky for miles around. Even those who had been with the emergency services for years found it hard to hold onto the contents of their stomachs as the first of them arrived ten minutes later. Bizarrely enough the captain and co-pilot had got off best with both still conscious when the services arrived. Of the remaining three survivors, one died before reaching hospital. "Quick, over here" called out one rescuer, Jeff Quigly, on searching behind what was left of the cockpit, "I think these two are alive" although how they had remained alive defied all sense of humanity. The two seats, containing what was left of Matthew and Tamara, were still joined together, linked by a piece of the railing that had held them to the floor. Within the seats were, what could only be described as, two bloody mounds of tissue, the bodies had sustained extensive mutilation but, amazingly enough, apart from the chest and lower body areas, their clothing appeared to remain relatively untouched. Seasoned air investigators often witnessed these logic-defying anomalies and it still seemed like a minor miracle when it happened! The girl's dress was still recognisable, as were the remains of a bra. A chill ran down Jeff's spine as he saw that she was still clutching her handbag. He carefully cut the strap from her hand, and removed it as gently as he could. This would be invaluable when it came to identification. The handbag seemed to be untouched and, as he opened it, he was rewarded with the sight of a passport and the carbon stub of the air ticket. As he waited for the summoned medical help to arrive, he knew that helping their injuries was way beyond his capabilities, he looked at the passport details. The picture showed a pretty dark-haired girl, with a slightly mischievous look about her. She wasn't beautiful, as in the style of a model, but was very attractive in a much more natural way. The name read Tamara McDonald and the birth-date showed that she was just twenty-one years old. He looked back at what remained of her, still strapped in the seat, and thanked God that she would be completely unaware of the extent of her injuries, and choked a little as he wondered what sort of future she would have now. He could hear help coming as he parted what was left of the mans jacket and felt inside the inner pocket where he found another passport. This was unusually lucky for them, two passengers still with their passports on an internal flight! He couldn't have realised that they were still carrying these from their earlier trip! He was taken aback, a little, when he looked at this man's details. "Matthew McDonald" he said aloud as he performed a double take on seeing the man's photograph. The resemblance between him and this girl was remarkable. Further investigation showed he carried the same birth-date as the girl and their resemblance now made sense to him as he realised they were twins. The irony continued as he could see that they now shared something else. An overhead panel had come loose from the ceiling and sliced through their bodies before coming to rest in their laps. The same panel was still embedded within them and he knew that they would have to cut it away if they were to get them out of here. * * * * * * * * * * * * Elizabeth McDonald was just lying down, trying to recover from the jet lag that she always suffered from after a transatlantic flight, when she was brought back to the real world by a knocking on her bedroom door. She tried to ignore it but the knocking returned. It was not going to go away so she raised herself from her bed and opened the door, putting her face around the small crack, to find Clarkson standing there with a grave expression on his face. "Madam, I have been asked to fetch you, there are some police downstairs who insist on seeing you" he said. Elizabeth sighed and shut the door. "Tell them I will be right down" she called through the door to him and put on a jogging suit, she couldn't face getting dressed - she just didn't have the energy. She looked in the mirror, straightened a few stray hairs, and walked through to the lounge where two Policemen were waiting. "Madam, I'm afraid we have some bad news - would you just sit down for a moment!". Her heart sank but she remained standing - could it be about Matthew - Tamara! "No thank you - I would prefer it if you just tell what you've got to say. I don't like melodrama" she said with great dignity. "There has been a plane crash to the North East of Gatwick. According to the passenger list your son and daughter were on board". She remained standing firm and seemed to grow a little as she inhaled, subconsciously trying to increase her intake of oxygen to steady herself. "Wer .. were", she nearly broke, "were there any survivors?". "There were just four maam, but we believe your children may be amongst them". "Oh thank God!" she uttered and it was at this point that Clarkson stepped in to support her - she looked ready to collapse. "I must warn you maam" the Policeman continued, "they are extremely ill and in a critical condition. It is not known whether it will be possible to save them". "No, no .. I can't let that happen. I .. I've got to see them, please take me to them" Elizabeth said as her stoical countenance cracked for the first time and tears started to build in her eyes. Her long forgotten religious practices suddenly seemed to beckon to her and she walked to the waiting Police vehicle clutching a hastily retrieved set of rosary beads. * * * * * * * * * * * * Saturday 21st September, 2005 - 21:12pm Sussex General Hospital, Crawley A trolley was being wheeled swiftly, but smoothly, along the corridor of the Special Burns Unit followed by, what seemed to be it's exact duplicate. Each trolley had what remained of a human being, still recognisable as such despite the appalling desecration that had been inflicted on their bodies. It was ironic really, the identical twin passengers had suffered, virtually, identical injuries and were being wheeled on identical trolleys in a identical fashion. Suspended drip feeds were attached to the arms and oxygen masks were put over what was left of their faces. The identical treatment they had received, symbolically, parted at that point as one trolley was wheeled to the female unit, the other to the male area. The patients had only suffered minor burns damage but it was the only unit that had the facilities to cope with the horrific injuries they bore so would have to do! Within ten minutes each were lying on an operating table within their sections. "Look at this, it's unbelievable how she has survived so long" Dr. Stephen Budd said as he started to cut away the clothing that had almost seemed to fuse with the body, bonded together by the dried blood that covered them. Despite having operated on many injuries, of all types, this was certainly one of the worst cases that he had ever seen. It appeared that a piece of the overhead panel had broken on impact and had 'sliced' downwards catching part of the girls face, slicing through the throat and upper torso before imbedding itself into the lower body area. Part of the panel was still lodged there and he knew that he didn't have the skill, or the nerve, to remove it. He decided to leave the clothing as it was and went to confer with a colleague. In the male section, a similar scene was unveiling. A part of the same panel was lodged in the man's gut. His chest had almost been peeled bare as the panel had slid down, and lumps of tissue had been removed from all around his torso and down to his thighs. This hospital simply did not have the expertise to treat these injuries and a decision was made to remove them as they were, to the a research unit in Oban, West Scotland which was the only place with the facilities to keep them alive. This was arranged immediately. And so it was that Matthew and Tamara completed their third flight in twenty-four hours and, finally, arrived in Glasgow, Scotland. It wasn't by the East coast, where they had planned to be, and they were not travelling First Class this time but neither had ever experienced the level of attention they were now receiving on any flight that they had previously been on. A high-tech ambulance took them the remainder of the way on the two-hour trip to the Oban facility. As with their entry to Crawley hospital, The McDonald's were placed in separate wings as appropriate to their gender. * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 4 - A New Hope Sunday 22nd September, 2005 - 9:06am Oban Research Facility, Scotland The Doctor came out of the operating theatre and took off the green gown and removed his cap and gloves. He washed his hands twice before filling them with water and burying his face in them, in an attempt to shake himself back to alertness. This had always been the part of the job that he hated most, the moment that he had to give what was usually, bad news. It was one of the reasons he had left the mainstream medical profession and had buried himself away up here so that he could indulge in his first love, research. He hated having to handle the emotional side of the job, preferring to avoid it completely! The research centre specialised in cloning, as well as repairing serious accident injuries, and it was by pure chance that he had been the only Doctor available when the patients had been brought in. At only twenty-six he hadn't gotten very far, being just a junior within an internal hierarchy. He had spent more time as an assistant than as a pioneer, despite the promising advances he had made in his first year. It had been a gruelling session in the operating theatre. The injuries had been amongst the worst that he had seen. He had operated on the girl whilst a colleague had dealt with the man although, if it hadn't been for the remnants of their clothing, it would have been almost impossible to tell who was who! She had suffered flashburns to her face and every hair on her head had been stripped away along with the top layer of skin. The hair follicles seemed to have been burnt away and he didn't think it was likely that it would ever grow back again. The throat had been damaged considerably and the upper chest area had been sliced clean through leaving only a few flaps of stretched tissue and skin where the breasts had been. As the panel piece had been removed they had found that she had been almost disembowelled with the whole stomach area being a bloody mess. The injuries had continued downwards, leaving a huge gash between the legs before resting between the thighs buried 2" deep within the leg itself. Beneath all of this damaged tissue lay a mass of broken bones. There seemed to be no part of the body that had remained undamaged and he really did not know where to start, shaking his head in despair! It was later after consulting with his colleague, the surgeon who had operated on this girl's brother, that he found that her brother had suffered almost identical injuries to her. "Mrs McDonald!" he said as he walked into the waiting room to see the striking late middle-aged woman standing looking out the window. As she turned around he could see the strain she was under, but he could also see a steely-eyed determination in her eyes. He continued "My name is Dr. Frobisher, that is Dr. Alan Frobisher. Please, take a seat over here" he said as he led her towards an uncomfortable looking chair in the corner. He thought that they should really provide better facilities for their visitors but they didn't really get many up here so it had seemed an extravagance! "I'm afraid that the news is not too good. You know, I presume, that they both had part of the aircraft embedded in them. It may sound surprising, but it was a good job that nobody tried to remove it. I think that the debris helped to staunch the wounds and they would probably have bled to death if it had been removed. We have spent the last few hours removing it and have just finished. We have managed to stabilise their condition for the time being, but the prognosis is not looking too good at the moment. They have both suffered severe internal damages, as well as extensive external injuries.". Elizabeth wavered a little but remained resolute and Alan Frobisher had to admire her fortitude as she composed herself. "I need to know Doctor , what will their lives be like if they survive?" "Well" he started to say and then paused for a second, "I think we can most probably keep them alive. It may even be possible to re-build them to a degree but existing regulations will not allow us to apply the techniques we have been developing that would allow them to regain a more than decent quality of life". Despite her upset Elizabeth seized on his last statement. "Legally allow you .. did you say legally! That must mean that you could do something for them. Just is it what you are researching here?" she questioned as she stared deep into his eyes, almost daring him to deny what he had just said! Dr. Frobisher's conscience was troubling him. He knew that this woman had no other dependants apart from these children and besides, if he was honest with himself, he was desperate for a chance to test his new technique out on something other than pigs and lab rats. There was little hope for these people other than the help that only he could provide. Elizabeth listened quietly while he told her about the research carried out here, and about his research in particular. The research centres major activity was centred on cloning and they had been making major progress in this area for some years now. They had kept their activities very low key, following the revelations of the first world-wide success when scientists in Britain produced the first surviving clone, the famous "Dolly" the sheep, about ten years ago. There had been a worldwide furore at the announcement and this had prompted caution at this twin establishment. He took Elizabeth back to the window and pointed towards the hillside. "You see those cattle grazing over there, they are all products of this centre" he said proudly. "Furthermore" he continued, "they are a breed that has been extinct for over ten years, victims of the BSE epidemic that swept the United Kingdom in the nineties. "Are you trying to tell me that you can clone human beings - are you saying that you can clone my children" she said almost in desperation - surely this couldn't be true! "No, no" he said swiftly trying to dampen her enthusiasm a little, "that is still a taboo subject, even in this day and age, and has still never been achieved. My own research has been centred on organ cloning with a view to help alleviate the current shortage of human body parts required for transplants. There had been some success in using pig hearts and kidneys during the last decade but there were too many theological opponents, and a natural human revulsion, to allow this to prosper as an option". He was now in full flow as the obsession, that had dominated his life for the last year, was given full reign. "I have been trying to grow human replacement parts from volunteer donors. If this is successful then it will be possible for everybody to have a spare set of vital organs for whenever they need them. I have managed to grow a working human heart in just six months". "Are you telling me that you could use this to help my children! Then what is stopping you?" Elizabeth said, as her voice raised a little in her impatience! "The only limiting factor now is money and some political lobbying. I know it seems mercenary but there simply isn't enough funds to support what I have discovered and, without that becoming available, I will never get the support from the management here, politically or otherwise!" he said feeling a little dirty, he almost felt like he was blackmailing her! As he had guessed, she would not let a thing like money prevent her from doing whatever it took to save her remaining family. He knew that he could win over his management and she had many friends in high places to fight the political battle. They were under ever increasing pressure from the current Government and their facility was, with the country being in the middle of another recession, at this very moment under threat. Elizabeth McDonald was made well aware of the risks that this pioneering treatment presented to her children, but still decided to sponsor the developments needed to give them a chance to survive with a decent quality of life. She could never have done any other. * * * * * * * * * * * * Tuesday 24th September, 2005 - 11:45am Luing, Scotland It had gone exactly as he had predicted, the management decided to back his proposal and allow Mrs McDonald to fund the developments needed to restore her children back to health. The key development would be establishing an additional facility to the existing one. The current centre only had the capability of treating one patient at a time and this treatment was likely to take years before it was completely finished. Andrew Frobisher gained an effective promotion and was put in charge of the project to convert some of the facilities within the existing centre at Oban and to, simultaneously, develop an existing property of theirs on the south side of the tiny island of Luing. Andrew had driven the thirty-minute journey along the single-lane road to the coastline, and then took the small ferry across to the island's only road. A ten-minute drive got him to the island's south coast. He left the four-wheel drive vehicle and breathed in the peat-laden air as he surveyed the research agency property. He was a little disappointed when he saw the dilapidated house in the middle of a large, and barren, plain. The Ministry of Defence warning signs were still present and a, still intact, barbed-wire perimeter fence protected it. He had been told that this place had been one of the best-kept secrets during the cold war back in the last century. He now knew that, underneath this innocuous looking house, there existed a small maze of bunkers and rest rooms that would have allowed up to ten occupants to become virtually self-sufficient for anything up to a year. The property had been handed over to the research agency when the government were cutting back on all defence activities , primarily due to cost of maintaining it's upkeep. The research agency had never used it and it was now under consideration on whether it should be left to run to ruin. Despite the house's appearance he had been told that the bunkers had been maintained and kept in pristine condition, who knew when they would be needed! They had an independent power supply - as well as the standard power feed from the mainland, sterilisation and water purifying capabilities, and an emergency stockpile of food, although Andrew certainly hoped that this would never be needed. Putting his best foot forward, when he had managed to extricate it from the damp peat swamp he seemed to be standing in, he walked over to unlock the gate and the house's front door that would give him access to the bunker. To his surprise, the key turned easily in the lock and he was soon inside and heading for the basement door where he was told a passageway existed, leading to the bunkers. He found the passageway entrance and unlocked a heavy steel security door that swung open smoothly as a series of overhead fluorescent lights flickered on automatically. He walked along the lit corridors until he finally found what he was looking for. He smiled to himself as he entered the bunkers main reception area and looked around the room. "Oh yes - this will be just perfect". * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 5 - Resurrection Work started on the Oban improvements immediately, and they were now in a position to start treatment on the first of the patients within three days. Mrs McDonald asked for her son to be treated first which was as the doctors would have recommended anyway - the injuries, whilst still severe, were more immediately treatable than her daughter's, a women's plumbing being far more complex. The girl, Andrew didn't want to start using her name - it made it too personal, was taken to the private room set aside for her long-term sedation. It was expected to take three months before the Luing facility was available and she would be on life support until they were ready to treat her. Tissue samples were taken from the twins, individually tagged, and then sent to the laboratory, where they would extract the base material needed to start cloning the new organs. Dr. Frobisher was confident that he would be able to grow all of their missing organs and then transplant them into the host bodies. This would include kidneys, lungs, urethra, womb and anything else needed to make the victims whole again. While Dr. Frobisher was overseeing the fitting out of the Luing facility his colleagues had started on repairing some of the superficial injuries on the male victim. He had been to inspect the new organ growth programme and stared at the glass tubes containing the first few cells, of what would turn out to be their new organs. It was one week later when the first tests were made on the replacement parts, and progress had been satisfactory. Dr. Frobisher's assistants had handled all of the laborious testing and presented the findings to him the next day. "Well, according to these reports everything seems to be progressing well - have you anything else to add to this" Andrew Frobisher quizzed Mary Colglan. She fidgeted slightly as her colleague, Clive Mason, kept silent. "No Sir", she said, "everything seems to be coming along fine. We've started on producing the duplicate copies of the cell growth in case they're needed, and we anticipate the less complex samples to be ready within three weeks". "Ah yes" he said consulting the report again. "So that means that we can begin work on the damaged upper and lower lip before the month's out". "Yes Sir" she answered, "His mother has provided us with enough detailed photographs so that we will able to restore them to their former state". "Good, good" he said without looking up from his notes. "That will be all for now. Give me an update in, oh, five days time please - I want to keep on top of this". Dr. Frobisher's assistants left his room and closed the door behind them. "Are you sure we've done the right thing" Mary said to Clive anxiously under her breath. "Yes Mary, it was only a small mistake and it won't make any difference whatsoever so why say anything about it! If it had slipped out that we'd got the labels muddled when we were processing the samples, then we would lose our jobs. It is not a good time to be without work right now - jobs are so hard to find!". Mary thought back to when the test tubes containing the samples had fallen in the sink full of water as Clive had laid them down for a moment. The labels were only attached by a thin layer of gum and had peeled off leaving a soggy mess in the sink. Mary suggested performing a chromosome test before beginning the processing and they could then separate, and re-label them accordingly. Once they had finished testing they re-labelled the test tubes with the confirmed gender and separated them so that the male samples could be treated now. The samples labelled 'Tamara' were put into storage for later treatment. Both Mary and Clive were unaware that this would have been the last opportunity to spot that the samples originally labelled Tamara were really male, and the samples labelled Matthew were female as would have come out in the first stage of processing. "I suppose you're right. Nobody's going to suffer because of it, so what difference would it make?" Mary replied and walked to the canteen for some coffee consigning Matthew and Tamara to their fates. * * * * * * * * * * * * Wednesday 12th April, 2006 - 3:08pm Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland "Clamps .. come on, come ON - pass me those clamps damn it! I need to finish this now!" the surgeon said irritably while he waiting for the nurse to get the necessary instruments. It had been a long, and hard day, and he just wanted to get this final insert finished and then he could rest. He had just started work on replacing the girls damaged liver and was anxious to see how it worked out. When the clamping and stitching had been finished he walked out of the operating theatre and removed his outer garments and started to wash his face and hands. Mary came in behind him and took away her mask. "I'm sorry I snapped at you Mary" he said as he knew his treatment to her had been unfair. "It is so frustrating, I just cannot understand why she rejected that first liver. It had, after all, been grown from cells taken from her own body so there should have been no problems!" he said with exasperation and slumped in the chair. "It was a good job we grew two of everything needed" Mary said, "it would have set us back four months otherwise". "I know, and that's why I'm so tense. If this fails like the last one then we have to start again. We will just have to wait and see how Clive's suggestion pans out. I only hope the local hormone treatment we applied will help the body to accept the liver - it was quite inspirational the way he predicted the abnormal hormonal activity within the abdominal area following his earlier experience with the male patient. He suspects it's due to the loss of the ovaries. That estrogen and progesterone solution seemed to bring the abdominal hormonal level to that of the liver we transplanted, and Clive said he will set up a drip to stabilise the rest of the body so it's the same. We cannot afford to have these problems with the rest of her transplants". Mary relaxed for a moment and sighed. "I hear that the male patient, back in Oban, is making good progress after the initial setback". Andrew sighed with her, it seemed it was contagious, as he thought back to the Oban centre - it had been some weeks since he had been there, preferring to devote his attentions to the female patient who was far more seriously damaged. "Yes, all is going well now. It was strange that he had a similar rejection problem until they managed to graft on the new penis and testicles. As soon as they started filling the body with testosterone the earlier transplant problems seemed to cease. That is why I am so keen to replace the females ovaries and womb again - it should speed along her recovery significantly if the males experience is anything to go by". "Everything we are doing is new and a challenge but, by God!, it's good to be on the leading edge isn't it" he said more to himself more than anyone else, and didn't really expect an answer. * * * * * * * * * * * * Friday 27th October, 2006 - 6:43am Oban Research Facility, Scotland The first thing that she became aware was the throbbing, and heavy feeling she had about her head. She squinted as she tried to shield her eyes from the bright light that seemed to be burning into her. Everything seemed to blur as she gradually grew accustomed to the light but she wasn't able to identify the bobbing and moving images she could see in front of her. She let out more of a whimper than a groan but it seemed, to her , to becoming from somebody else and she lapsed back into the long sleep from which she had just awoken from for the first time in over a year. * * * * * * * * * * * * Sunday 29th October, 2006 - 8:14am Oban Research Facility, Scotland She first became aware of a sound, then a light and then a series of moving shapes. Her experience still had a surreal quality about it but this time, she was determined to hang onto it and not let it go. She vaguely remembered a similar occurrence but lost the thought as she recognised someone talking. "Matthew .. Matthew, can you hear me" it said. That thought alone seemed to take hours to filter into her consciousness and when it did she was still confused! "Matthew, why are they talking to Matthew - what's happened to him" she thought and tried to say something but her throat only gave a slight dry heave. "Here have this" a voice said and she felt her head lifting slightly, and a gloriously cool liquid making it's way down her throat. This time, when she tried to speak, a recognisable noise came out. "Wh .. what, what has happened to me" she croaked as the memories of thirteen months ago started to make their presence felt. She remembered the aircraft spiralling and the awful metallic tang of burning wiring that, she knew, would remain with her for the rest of her days. Amongst these thoughts came the realisation that there was an undefinable difference about her voice that went beyond the dryness she was experiencing. She also felt something different about her whole being but couldn't place it. Her efforts exhausted her and she, again, fell into a welcome sleep. * * * * * * * * * * * * Thursday 24th January, 2008 - 2:24pm Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland Matthew's awakening was far steadier than his sister's had been. He had been lying, as if in a trance, for an hour now as he started to adjust to the outside world again. All he could remember was a long succession of dreams, which took him through his childhood until the present day. He was a little confused by this because Tamara seemed to feature in all of them and there had been more than a fourteen year gap in their real lives. He almost felt like he was outside his body as he could start to make out things around him. About ten minutes later he managed to turn his head slightly and could make out a white shaped figure and a noise. A little more concentration and he heard "Tamara, take it easy - can you make out what I'm saying". He was puzzled - what was Tamara doing here and why are they asking her questions? The next thing he saw was a bright light moving from side to side in front of his eyes. As it moved sideways he could make out the face of a man staring directly into his eyes. The face gradually pulled back which made it easier for him to focus, and he saw a dark-haired man who looked to be in his late twenties. He had started to have flashbacks, back to an aircraft taking off and then banking, followed by darkness. There was something buried deep within his mind and he got a little panicky as he tried to grasp it. He started to moan a little and called out for Tamara and it was then that he knew that something strange had happened to him. His voice seemed soft and high-pitched, almost like a girl's, and, for a brief moment, his mind went back to his impersonation and he had a vivid memory of the throat spray he had used. This seemed to snap him out of his panic attack a he became more aware of what was around him. The doctor returned and spoke to someone who must have been at his side, that Matthew couldn't quite see yet. "This is looking good, she is starting to come around now, completely. She has recognised her name and telling us who she is" Dr. Frobisher said as he indicated for his companion to come into view. "Come over here, I think she could do with seeing a friendly face" he said as Tamara walked over. She had been dreading this moment - how would he take this? "Hello Tamara" she said nervously, "how are you feeling - you've been through quite an ordeal". He had reasoned, by now, that he had been in an accident and, his ever clearing eyes could see what looked to be a hospital room complete with doctor and, what clearly was, to his astonishment, himself! He could now remember the bet, and also Tamara's impersonation of him, but surely - he was in a hospital now - she couldn't still be pretending to be him could she! How long had he been here? These thoughts spun around and around inside his muddled brain until he could take no more and finally 'blacked out'. "That was good progress, she even managed to say a few words though it was strange the way she looked at you - it was almost like she was shocked!" Dr. Frobisher said to Tamara slightly puzzled. Tamara turned to walk out of the room, saying only "Maybe it would be better if I saw her on her own next time" before she left. * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 6 - Revelation Thursday 24th January, 2008 - 7:38pm Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland The next time Matthew woke, he was on his own. The nurse monitoring him was talking to a friend and had turned down the constant bleeping signals that she found so irritating. This was a really boring duty and she hated it! Nothing ever seemed to happen and she made sure that she kept glancing in the patients direction from time to time, just in case she moved. He was lying still and trying to compose himself, remembering what he thought had been a bad dream which ended with him looking up at himself. He had been like this for twenty minutes now, and his mind had been probing his body, trying to make some sense of what he was feeling. He couldn't feel anything at first and had feared he was paralysed but, as he gradually willed his extremities into responding to his thoughts, began to wonder why the feelings that were being returned were so alien! At first, he had put this down to the fact that he had obviously been here for a long period of time which was, as yet, undefined, and he reasoned that everything would feel strange at first. As the feeling persisted, however, his concern became more prolonged and he wanted to explore further. The straps that held him secure to the bed prevented this and he began to feel a little claustrophobic. His concentration was focused around his abdominal area. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, literally as it happened, but he experienced feelings like an aching gap, yet of also being filled. It felt most uncomfortable! Maybe the feelings of cramp were just hunger pains - he certainly hoped so! The other area, that he was acutely aware of, was around his chest. He reasoned that he must have something resting on it as there seemed to be an unaccustomed weight there. He hoped that they would remove it soon, it was making his chest sore and he felt hypersensitive all around that area, especially where his nipples were. It was when he tried to speak, he had hoped that the strange voice he had heard the last time he spoke was just a part of his dream, that the nurse became aware of him and summoned the doctor. Ten minutes later the doctor and Tamara were outside the private room where Matthew was being kept. "Are you sure you want to talk to her on her own - she may be nervous, or even become hysterical!" Dr. Frobisher questioned. Tamara appraised him, for a moment, as a woman might have done - although to the outside world she was anything but a woman. It had been a while since she had lapsed into this thought pattern, having finally coming to terms with her new male existence, and she was a little disappointed that she sometimes still thought this way. He was quite handsome, with his sandy coloured hair and his penetrating blue eyes and maybe, three years or so ago, she might have fallen for him but she shook these thoughts away. "No, I think she", how strange it still seemed to think of Matthew as a she, "will find it easier to accept her situation if it comes from me" she said, a little ambiguously. "All right then. We will turn of the acoustic monitoring as per your wishes, and wish you luck - this won't be easy" he said as he led Tamara to the door. "And, by the way, she started menstruating again this afternoon. That's her third full cycle and she seems to be settling into a rhythm now. That's good news - her own body is now filling her with her natural hormones again - we can stop the artificial supplements now". This caused Tamara to pause and swallow for a moment as she thought about how Matthew would take to having periods. She knew that she had suffered dreadfully with hers, there was no reason to think that he wouldn't also, and that this was one aspect that she didn't miss about no longer being female. Well, he would now know - first hand - why women can become such martyrs at times and also why, for a few days a month, they all seemed to men! * * * * * * * * * * * * Matthew heard the click of a handle turning and moved his eyes to see the door open. He was a little more prepared this time when he saw himself walk in the room. It must be Tamara, he reasoned, but this time on her own. He wondered why she looked like him - surely the joke must now be long over! "Hello Matthew, how are you feeling" Tamara said to him in voice that bore a strong resemblance to his own but was yet, not quite the same. "I'm feeling bloody awful actually" he said a little irritably and then stopped as he heard the sound of his voice again. There was no doubt about it this time, although he sounded a bit husky he definitely had a girl's voice. The blood pounded around his body and he felt a throbbing in his head as he tried to take this all in - the sight of Tamara looking like him, the sound of his voice - it was getting too much again. A few deep breaths calmed him down a little, he was damned if was going to keep swooning like some hysterical girl, and he looked at the very male Tamara again. He started noticing the little things now - a few strands of hair peeking over her open necked collar, her face which had obviously been receiving the attentions of a razor - it just didn't make any sense! Tamara helped Matthew take a sip of liquid and this time, when he spoke, he did so in a slightly more melodious tone. "Tell me Tamara, just how long have I been here and what's been happening? You're not still in disguise after all this time are you, there's something different about you?" "Take it steady Matthew, you've been out for a long time and this will come as a bit of a shock to you" she said trying to avoid building any unnecessary anticipation - better to get this part over with! "You've been unconscious for over two years now Matthew. We were in a plane crash on our way to Scotland and were just two out of a handful of survivors. We are both badly injured with you coming off the worse, and we're now in a research facility on a remote Scottish Island". "Two years, TWO YEARS!!! Jesus! What has happened to me, to US, in that time - I'm beginning to get scared now - can't you untie me?" he said as he struggled with the straps around him, acutely aware of his soprano voice. "I can undo them in a minute if you'll just calm down a little - I don't want you hurting yourself" she said as she leant over to check the straps that held him. Satisfied that they were still holding firm, she freed his right arm and loosened the straps around his body a little. The relief was welcome but this was only a brief respite, as soon as the pressure had been eased from his body, he started to feel other changes. Tamara could see the apprehension in his face and determined to tell him the rest quickly. "Look Matthew, as far as the world is concerned you are now Tamara McDonald and I am Matthew. We have both been through the most extensive changes that have ever been made on two individuals but only from the best of intentions". Tamara rubbed her jaw and felt the hint of stubble that was starting to appear as she considered how this had affected her, now him. Matthew said nothing as he started to move his hand to his chest and, could now, feel that the padding, or what he thought was padding, moving as if it were a part of him. Tamara decided to keep quiet for a moment and let him make his own discoveries. He raised his right hand and he could see that they were now a little more refined than they had been - nothing drastic, they had never been that big to start with! This impression was gained, mainly, from the longer nails he now possessed that added just that vital inch to make his hands appear both longer and slender. He managed to pull himself into a sitting position and raised the bed covers to examine his lower body. He knew what he would find, even before his touch confirmed it, but his horror was not lessened at the smooth mound that greeted his probing fingers. He had felt that smoothness before when he was impersonating Tamara, and his sex had been pulled back and hidden to present the same effect. This was totally different however, there was none of the uncomfortable feeling he had previously experienced and his hand just glided, unopposed, into the void between his legs. Tamara coughed. "Uh, Matthew - I know this must be interesting for you but we still need to talk". He looked up at her as soft tears gently rolled down his smooth cheeks. He had never doubted her confirmation of his changed condition for a moment. "Oh Tamara, why - what's happened to us. I can't live like this - I can't be you - I don't want to be a girl. They've got to change us back" Matthew sobbed as Tamara put a brotherly arm around the girl's shoulder. "That's not possible Matthew. Now just try and pull yourself together for a while, there some other things you need to know about but however you feel, you are now Tamara. There is no way back and if you don't want them to think your mind has snapped then you've go to play the part like I've learned to". How could she be so calm and so rational about this! She couldn't just expect him to assume her life while she took over his, surely! A thousand thoughts raced through his mind as he desperately tried to cling to his identity. "This is ridiculous, nobody is going to believe that you're really me - mother will surely know - just how long do you think you can hope to keep this up" he said in an increasingly shrill and panicky tone. "Look Tamara, yes - that is how I'm going to refer to you from now on - just calm down again, this will get us nowhere! You need to know a few more things - I said we need to talk". He was taken aback by her authoritative tone but this seemed to calm him a little and he slumped back against the pillow as looked at her like a frightened, and vulnerable, child. The original Tamara continued. "I told you that you had been unconscious for over two years. That doesn't mean that I was. I came back over fourteen months ago, and yes" she paused as she saw his incredulous face, "I awoke to the same scenario as you have only, in my case, in reverse!". Tamara was obviously very wound up and intense as she, now he, paced around the room. He was finding this hard and felt very tense as his soothing tone disappeared. "How do you think I felt when I woke up to feel hair on my face. How do you think I felt when I found my tits had gone. How do you think I felt when I found I had a extra piece of awkward flesh hanging down between my legs". Matthew almost felt ashamed as he saw his former sister, now his - no her - brother, so upset. "I'll tell you TAMARA, I'll tell you. I felt damn awful! It took me a long time until I could hold a conversation with them. I had been telling them my name Goddamnit - that was the only thing I could utter for three months - and all they thought , all they thought was that I was worried about was YOU. Isn't that the ultimate joke! They thought they you were ME!!". Matthew sat there just listening. He could tell that her suffering was finally being let out and he let her continue. "By the time I could finally communicate, they kept me under sedation during all this time, it was too late. They had already re-built me as a man and you know what, I accepted it. I had a long time to come to terms with what they were doing and, to this day, I don't know how I kept myself sane. How do you think I felt when I woke up to find I was now a man - I was happy being a girl!". "I . . I'm sorry, I hadn't thought about you. It must have been awful but it still doesn't help me any - what have I got left to live for now" Matthew said . "You are going to have to stop this self-pity, a lot of people have given a lot of things so that we can be here, even if it's not how we wanted. I was going to break things to you gently but there's not much point now - we've got this far so you might as well hear the rest" Tamara said as she stopped pacing and pulled up a chair next to him. Her calmed demeanour should have re-assured him. It didn't! She was obviously, going to unleash further shocking revelations and he braced himself - he was sure, at this point, the anticipation must be ten times worse than anything else that was coming. He was wrong. "Please Tamara, can you get these straps off of me - I won't do anything stupid and I think I'm getting pins and needles now!". She gave this some consideration but, finally, leant over and undid the straps. Matthew stretched his limbs slowly, looking almost feline as he did so. As he spread his legs he could feel the new sensations from his newly implanted sex, as the skin seemed to separate from itself and emphasise the void that now existed there. Tamara continued. "I don't think you're going to like me very much after this but I want it all out now. I told you how I woke fourteen months ago - well my first visitor was our mother. I don't know if I was more shocked by my own circumstances or by how she looked when they wheeled her in". Matthew went pale for a second. "Wheeled her in! Wh .. what happened, how is she now" he spluttered. "She had taken the accident very badly, after first appearing to hold up well. She had a stroke about four months before I came around". Tamara quelled Matthew's questions and continued. "She's Okay now but you will still get a shock when you see here. I don't think she take any further emotional trauma's - it might finish her off". "But does she know who you really are - I mean, surely, she must have noticed by now!" Matthew said incredulously. "She knows who I am Matthew - I am who you used to be. She doesn't know who I was though. As far as she is aware her errant daughter is recovering in this bed right now" she said as she rested her hand on the bedcovers where he was sitting. "That's not all, please listen" she said as he motioned to talk again. He could see she was nervous about this part. "My second visitor was Katrina" Katrina, Katrina. Why hadn't he thought about her up until now - they were going to get engaged! "I don't know if you were aware of just how much she loved you Matthew. As soon as she knew that I had regained consciousness she flew down here to be with, what she thought, was you. You know, our likeness is amazing! She didn't even realise that I was anything other than what I appeared to be. By this time the first wave of surgery had finished for me - your re-grown cock and balls had taken nicely and were pumping testosterone all around my body. I had, what looked like, two days light growth on my face and a few strays hairs were even appearing on my flat chest" Tamara took a sip from a glass of water and continued, obviously finding this hard. "Anyway" another sip, "I couldn't tell her who I really was at the time, and when I could I didn't want to. She put her modelling on hold and stayed here with me for six months until I was released. I was so glad to have her company and found myself very grateful, for the waves of love she gave me that were almost tangible! She became such a support for me that I found, by the time I had recovered enough to leave, that I was really in love with her as well". Matthew started to feel very uncomfortable with the way this was going and felt a pang of jealousy as he realised that the girl he loved, had fallen in love with another woman. She wasn't really another woman by now though, was she! She had simply continued her love with what she thought was me - how could that be considered unfaithful? He felt so confused, not knowing how to cope with any of this! "Katrina and I got married last month Matthew. "Bu .. but how could you! How could you take over my life like this - why couldn't you wait for me to recover" Matthew sobbed at the realisation that his whole world, everything he had known up until now, had fallen apart. All he had left was this female body that he didn't know how to control or whether he could ever again shed it. "She was pregnant - the miracles of modern science eh!" Tamara said with an ironic smile on her face. * * * * * * * * * * * * Thursday 25th January, 2008 - 9:12am Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland Matthew woke next morning with a terrible headache, which he presumed was a result of the sedatives that he had been given after Tamara had walked out. They were given as a result of the hysterical state he was in following Tamara's news about Katrina. He hadn't been able to understand why she said it was impossible for them to be changed again - it may have taken a long time but there was no way he wanted to take over her life. She soon dispelled his entreaties to change themselves back by pointing out there were a number of good and logical reasons why this was they couldn't do so. 1) There was no way that they could afford to spend the small fortune it would take to get this cutting edge treatment repeated. Matthew had been shocked to find his mother had to sell her mansion to fund this treatment and was now living in substantially reduced circumstances. 2) The shock, for their mother, in finding out the truth would most likely kill her. 3) The research facility would soon run out of money and, when Matthew had fully recovered, would be wound down. The recession was really biting now and the management had finally ceded to Government pressure. Apart from these irrefutable reasons Tamara had told Matthew that she now had no desire, whatsoever, to have her old life back. She had envied Matthew's relationship with his mother - one that she had now enjoyed for herself for over a year. She was also in love with Katrina, and looking forward to becoming a father. It was Katrina who pulled her through and, besides, she really enjoyed the instant gratification she got from sex as a man now. It had taken her seven months to come to terms with it, but her former life now seemed like just a dream and she would never go back to it. She had actually unzipped her trousers, and lowered them to show Matthew the reality of her newly grown penis and this left him speechless. It was so strange seeing something so intimate and so familiar on another persons body - the problem was, this was not some other persons body but his own - he just wasn't in it any more. The sight of Tamara sporting his penis sent his thoughts racing back to his own newly grown parts and he felt quite nauseous as he thought about the periods, the internal examinations, and all the other unpleasant things that went with being a woman. It was far to soon for him to consider some of the more pleasurable aspects and he sank into a well of depression! As Tamara left he wept inconsolably - she had taken over his life and he was left with nothing but a new set of complicated equipment that he had no idea how to treat or control. All that he had left now was just the fact that he now seemed to be a girl, a girl whether he liked it or not, and all the indications were that this was going to be a permanent state of affairs with Tamara assuming his identity so successfully. Never had he thought, not in his wildest dreams, that he would have spent the rest of his life as a female as a result of taking that stupid bet! * * * * * * * * * * * * Although he had been devastated by his ex-sisters visit, his biggest heartbreak was still to come. His mother had been brought to see him that afternoon. His first sight of her had been a shock - she had looked so much older and more fragile now. The thing that he found the most hurtful, and also the hardest for him to bear, was her aloof and distant regard for him. She hadn't forgotten her failed attempts at a reconciliation, and Tamara's off-hand reaction to them, and as she now assumed that Matthew was Tamara he bore the brunt of her pain. It was also obvious that to a large degree, she blamed, what she now considered to be Tamara, for Matthew even being on that fateful aircraft on the afternoon of the crash. She told Matthew that she felt she had done everything she could for her 'daughter' and that Tamara must now make her own path in life from now on. The door would always be open for her if she wanted to try again but she couldn't at this stage think how she could forget what had happened. Matthew could not bring himself to tell his mother the truth. He showed how much he loved her by sparing her any further anguish, anguish that could have been fatal to her, and kept his own counsel as she left him to his despair. * * * * * * * * * * * * Part 7 - The Road Back Monday 29th January, 2008 - 13:15pm Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland Dr. Frobisher sat in his underground office, tapping a pencil on the side of his desk. He had called a meeting of his key support staff to discuss the concern they had about the patient. As Mary and Clive walked in he got straight to the point. "Okay, I wanted a review of our patient as I'm a little concerned at her progress since she regained consciousness. Let's recap. She woke five days ago and all her bodily functions seem to be working okay but she seems to be sinking. Any thoughts?" he said as he leaned backwards and pushed his dampened hair back away from his forehead. He hated the stuffiness within this complex and his heightened tension was making him increasingly agitated. Clive ran through his medical report. He confirmed that, physically, she was in good health. The scarring from the cosmetic surgery had healed; all the new organs had adapted well and were operating normally and she had just completed her third menstrual cycle and appeared to be fertile. All in all the ground breaking techniques they had employed had seemed to be a 100% success. He couldn't understand it! The main thing that had puzzled him had been her lack of knowledge about how to cope with her period. He exclaimed that it had almost seemed like she had never experienced one before. The men looked across to Mary who seemed to shuffle a little awkwardly in her seat. "Well" she said almost inaudibly, "I don't think that the physical side of her condition is the problem. I've been trying to talk to her, you know - a little girl talk to try and make her feel normal - and I've been getting no reaction. She seems to have sunk into a deep hole since her brother left and she is just not reacting like a typical woman would. I can't quite put my finger on it but she seems so withdrawn and unfeminine, almost like a man" she said unable to resist a small jibe at her colleagues. "Maybe what she's been through has left her in deep shock - maybe she just needs to try and have a little normality back in her life, you know, make her feel like a woman again!" Alan Frobisher looked at Mary speculatively, this would never have occurred to him and maybe she was onto something! Mary was quite surprised when he didn't immediately treat her comments with derision. Maybe his 'professional' indifference of the patient was beginning to show a few cracks! * * * * * * * * * * * * Now that she was off the 'critical' list they felt more comfortable about treating her like a human being again, and decided to make a conscious effort to always call her by her name. They had decided that they would also give Tamara a goal, something to aim for. She needed something to else to think about other than what she had been through! It hadn't gone too well at first. Mary had tried to engage her in conversation about the latest fashions and what interested her but she drew a complete blank. Tamara had no interest whatsoever in anything remotely feminine! Tamara was walking now, and coping better following the physiotherapy and massage treatment she had been having but Mary had noticed how she avoided looking in mirrors and asking to dress in anything other than the hospital gowns that were provided. Mary was puzzled - she was a beautiful girl and looked completely normal now - surely she couldn't be as frightened as she appeared to be at what she might see! It was when Mary finally lost her cool that this cycle was finally broken. Dr. Frobisher had suggested to Tamara, in the subtlest possible way, that she might well benefit from some counselling and therapy to help her with her apparent identity crisis, because that was what she was appearing to suffer from. She seemed to have no empathy with anything to do with being female or her former life. She hadn't exactly refused to go with this suggestion but merely shrugged - he had decided to interpret this as consent and made the necessary arrangements. Mary had offered to go to the mainland, back to Oban, and to purchase a brand new set of clothes for her. She, of all people, should not have any trouble getting the right size - she knew every inch and pound of Tamara's measurement. It was when she returned that her patience finally snapped. "Oh this is ridiculous," she shouted as she threw the new clothes on the floor in Tamara's room. She had brought back a small selection of dresses, skirts and blouses, and a pair of slacks that were both practical but feminine. Oban is hardly the centre of the fashion universe but still held a modest selection of modern fashions for young women. Tamara had, again, shown no interest and merely snorted when Mary had shown her a short cobalt blue dress that would have complemented her natural colouring perfectly. Mary had been hurt by her attitude and would be glad when the therapist arrived tomorrow - she had given everything she had but had been rebuffed and now decided to give Tamara a piece of her mind. "Right, I've had enough of you - you're acting like some selfish little girl. Do you know how much has been given by people to give you this chance of a normal life?" she ranted as Matthew looked up at her. She made real eye contact with Mary for the first time in days, shocked into acknowledgement. Mary failed to notice this and continued her lecture sounding, like a mother berating a teenage girl. This analogy was fairly accurate in reality. Matthew was experiencing a flood of female hormones - something he had never before experienced and was completely disorientated by this. He was now, in effect, entering his second spell of puberty but this time, however, he was experiencing it from a new and unsettling perspective. He was dangerously close to a total breakdown and another two or three minutes of listening to Mary finally elicited a reaction from him. "Don't you dare talk to me like that" Matthew cried back at her, tears flowing down his cheeks. "I didn't ask for you to do this, I didn't ask for you to put me through this. Why didn't you just let me die?". Mary stopped dead in her tracks. Finally, she had got a response from her - she had broken though! Now was not the time to hold back. "God, you are so selfish girl - you are just so selfish. I was not talking about us; I wasn't talking about those who worked here. It was our job to get you to this stage and, quite frankly, I will be pleased when somebody else picks up the pieces and try's to deal with you. No, I was talking about your mother. She has given up everything to do this for you and your brother. Everything - even to the point of losing her home and her health. If you're going to let that sacrifice be wasted then, whether you're beautiful, suffering, in shock or what - I am not interested - you are one selfish bitch" she almost spat at her, finishing her verbal assault. Matthew looked up at her through his feminine tear-ridden eyes. He was calm again, just for a moment. "You don't understand - I can't live like this. I wasn't Tamara I was Matthew. You've made me this freak I am today. I am Matthew McDonald who is now trapped in my sister's body but it's not really my sister's body is it! It's my own body. How would you feel if you found your own body was betraying you every time you looked in the mirror!". With that shocking revelation Matthew broke down and cried hysterically leaving the shell-shocked, and guilty feeling medical assistant, who was now seeing the series of mistakes they had made as if they were standing starkly in front of her. From the time when the samples had been mixed to the initial rejections of the organs, only successfully completed by the massive hormone wash. She clasped one hand to her bosom while the other rose to her mouth as she gasped; "Oh my God, you poor, poor girl. What have we done to you!" as she went across to hold what she could only think of as Tamara. Intuitively, she knew that this girl was originally Matthew, and that he had just told her the truth! * * * * * * * * * * * * Friday 2nd February, 2008 - 10:24am Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland It was hard to tell who had been the most shocked that day. This girl who everyone knew as Tamara for telling the fact that she was really her brother Matthew, or Mary, who had listened to the whole story now from the start to where they had boarded the flight from Gatwick. She had implored Mary not to reveal this to anyone else, she couldn't have borne the humiliation, humiliation from her own perspective anyway, of how Matthew had been tricked in the first place all the way through to his current situation. This gave Mary a lever that she could use to help him adjust to how he now found himself - she knew Matthew had been correct in his reasoning for why things couldn't be corrected. She also wasn't sure that a body could have the kind of treatment that he had received twice in such a short space of time, even if the funding and availability of this centre was possible. She would have to help him become this girl that he now appeared to be. Mary had already set this train of events in motion by getting Matthew to open up. Even now, despite knowing his story, there was no real way that she could really imagine this lovely girl as the man she had once been. Mary could see that by unburdening himself to her, Matthew had taken the first tentative steps to retaining his sanity and to facing up to his future. The first step would be in recognising that he would have to spend the rest of the foreseeable future with the body that he now possessed. Having done this, he would have to accept, and to start developing his own self image, so that he would regard himself as the girl who he now appeared to be. He had to start thinking of himself as Tamara in every way. After letting go of him, Mary walked over to the bathroom and started running a hot and steamy bath. She threw in a pearl of rose scented bath oil and removed Matthew's hospital gown, and helped him settle into the fragrant water. "Come on now Tamara, just lose yourself - forget everything except the warmth and what you can smell" she said as she stroked the girl's head. "Tama .. Tamara, you called me Tamara despite what you know!" he said as he slid deeper into the water, his breasts peeking over the water's surface. "Because my dear, that's who you are and who you have to be from now on - I'll never call you Matthew and you've got to stop thinking that way. Can you cope with that, you really have no choice you know!". Tamara just lay there; Mary could still see the inner turmoil. "Come on Tamara, you don't have to be tough any more - not physically anyway. If you let yourself go you might even find that just this alone can be a release" Mary continued. "I can understand how this might sound ridiculous now, but it can be quite fun being a girl at times - you might even get to enjoy it. Can't you feel how smooth the oil makes you skin feel - can't you feel how deliciously tender the warm water makes your nipples! Come on Tamara, surrender yourself to your feelings" she said, noticing how Tamara was finally starting to relax. Tamara's fingers were unconsciously playing with her breasts, making small circles around her aureole, seeming to take comfort from it Mary noticed gratefully. Then another idea hit her. It would be a bit of a gamble but she had to say it anyway, she had to try. "Go on Tamara - I dare you, I dare you to be strong enough to be the girl you are". The naked girl, flushed deep pink from the steam, looked up at Mary with her large and attractive eyes and started to cry as she remembered the last dare that she took as Matthew, and where it had got her. To Mary's relief the crying turned to laughter until the two women were sitting holding each other, both alternatively laughing and crying. Mary knew she was winning. Part 8 - New Beginnings The next day Tamara woke in the morning and, for the first time since the accident, she didn't felt uncomfortable with what she found. She didn't feel comfortable yet but it was a start. Ironically it was Matthew's main strengths that helped him to accept becoming Tamara. His stubbornness, and never knowing when to quit, made him plunge headlong into his new goal - he was determined to become Tamara - mind and body, if not quite soul. She lifted herself out of her bed and looked down at herself critically. She acknowledged the two lumps on her chest and removed the medical nightgown she had worn to get a better look at them. A bra had been too much for her to accept at first but, cupping her hands beneath them, she lifted them, feeling their weight. She looked around the room for the clothes that Mary had said she'd leave and saw and saw the underwear that Mary had purchased for her. Before doing anything though, she walked into the adjoining bathroom and relieved herself, wiping afterwards as she had been told to. She stood and, for the first time, examined her naked body in the full-length mirror on the back of the door. It was certainly strange, as she could see her own sister standing there, looking herself up and down as this body responded to the movements she was making. She watched the reflection of the hands wander down to her side and felt the soft skin as it curved along to her hips. She watched the hand wander to her groin to play with the dark triangle of soft, pubic hair that framed the essence of her femaleness, So much softer than the course hair Matthew had possessed. She watched the reflections legs part slightly to allow this body's fingers to stroke the outer lips of what, was now, an aching void where her manhood had once nestled. She watched this reflection lift a finger to its nose and smelt the muskiness she was so familiar with, albeit from a different perspective. She turned out of the bathroom and picked up the clothes next to her bed. She picked up the satin feeling panties and pulled them up tightly, feeling them grip her rounded bottom with a firm snugness she had never experienced. She ran one hand around her backside, admiring the sleek feeling. She picked up the matching bra and, after a couple of minutes, had it easing the weight from her bosom. As she ran a hand across her breasts she felt her nipples harden in response, making little tents in the fabric. Tamara opened a packet of tan pantie-hose and gently rolled them up each of her smooth legs in the way that her sister had shown her. This was followed by a short, but comfortable, dress. She had chosen the dress to prove a point to herself; choosing the slacks would have been a cop-out. After pulling a brush through her hair she walked into the bathroom again, she wanted to see how she looked now. It was true that she had worn women's clothing before, but this time it felt totally different. As she walked to the bathroom she thought back to when she was impersonating the real Tamara. The feeling of the pantie-hose on her thighs had been the same. The feeling of her legs moving unencumbered felt the same. The most notable difference now though, was the absence of anything between her legs; it felt so different from when Matthew's penis had been taped back between his legs and she was constantly aware of what was now missing and wondered if she would ever get used to this feeling. Looking at herself in the mirror wasn't so hard this time. She thought she looked a little pale but, then again, she hadn't been outside for a long, long time now. She thought about trying some make-up, Mary had left a vanity bag for her - just in case - but this was going a little too far for now. Again, she had tried it before but this time it was different, this was not pretending! Satisfied with what she saw, Tamara walked out of her room to join the others for breakfast - another first. * * * * * * * * * * * * Over the next few weeks Tamara slowly started to adapt. The arrival of the therapist heralded the turning point. She had arrived, expecting a difficult patient who was resisting help. What she found was a nervous, and shy, young woman, who had to be led back along the path to womanhood. It was as if she had forgotten everything about being female but she soon proved herself to be a star pupil, eagerly seeking out each new experience with an almost adolescent sense of discovery. She had spent her first trip to the outside world shopping on the mainland. She had gone with Mary and, although nervous, she managed to cope okay which gave her confidence. When Tamara, or 'Matthew' now as she had conditioned herself to think about her ex-sister, had arrived he had been relieved and surprised to find such a change of attitude from his 'sister'. The visit didn't last too long though, as 'Tamara' found it too upsetting to be confronted with the reality of her former state. There was one breakthrough, however, during that visit. "Look Tamara, I've got something to tell you. I've been holding back from saying this because I know it'll upset you" Matthew said to her as she looked at him seated on the end of her bed. She remembered the last time he had spoken like this and the ensuing breakdown she had. She was a different person now and only felt a little irritated by the patronising way he was holding his cards close to his chest. "Matthew, stop playing games. If you've got something to say then say it, how bad can whatever you tell me be when I've already lost my gender, my job, my fiancee and even my life and identity. The thing is, I don't care anymore - I'll be building back all those things again but this time as Tamara. Just tell me and spare the drama". Matthew prickled a little. He hadn't been spoken to in such a direct way for a long time, certainly since he had assumed his brother's identity. His pride made him more direct than he had intended to be. "I've told Katrina," he said looking at her intensely, waiting to see her reaction. "You've done what!" she shrieked, amazing him at how she looked so much he had used to - even sounded like her! "I had to, I couldn't carry on pretending and deceiving her. I love her Tammy - she had a right to know" he said looking at his sister, not knowing how she'd react. If he expected hysterics or crying and wailing then he would be disappointed. Tamara just took a deep breath and then spoke calmly. "An .. and how did she take this little bit of news". "Surprisingly well. You know Tam, she certainly is something special - I really do love her". "Yeah tell me about it" she responded, a little bitter. "I'm sorry Tammy, I never planned for this to happen you know" he said taking hold of her slim hand. He continued. "Sh .. she said it didn't make any difference to her, she said she was in love with me whatever I was and whatever happens - she just wants to have my baby. She did say she really, really wants to meet you and worried about you. She told me to tell you that she is dying to meet her new sister-in-law. She's sure you'll have a lot in common" he said, not realising the irony of his statement. "More than I would have ever believed possible" Tamara replied softly, tears starting to well in her eyes again. "Look, I think you'd better leave Matt. I .. I need some time to get used to this" she said as she took both his hands and leaned across to kiss him on the cheeks. They both parted with tears in their eyes. * * * * * * * * * * * * Wednesday 30th April, 2008 - 10:05am Luing Advanced Laboratories, Scotland The three months since her awakening had flown by. The new Tamara was evolving as a new person entirely. She exhibited all of the tenacity and stubbornness of Matthew McDonald but the female hormones now pumping around her body had tempered her original personality a little! She was now a little less inclined to jump in with both feet and was more inclined to consider the effect of what she was either doing or saying, and the impact it may have on others. The Doctors, and Mary in particular, were delighted with the progress she was making. She had approached the task of not only passing as a female, but also becoming the female she appeared to be, with a passion. She almost gave herself a breakdown, such was the intensity that she put into her 'training' until she eased off a little, as the counsellors and therapists probed the reason why. Oh, she had not yet mastered the genuine feminine reactions she now desired. She would have to experience life as a female in the 'real' world before that could happen, but she no longer viewed this prospect with dread. After his last visit she had come to terms with her relationship with 'Matthew', and would now talk to him on the phone on a regular basis. She had been cautious at first, still hurt at what had happened but was now looking forward to seeing him again - Katrina was still a problem for her though. She decided she would give herself some space to build a new life before she could face them all again, that way she would be complete and better able to cope. She was also anticipating meeting up with her mother again, she missed her dreadfully. Matthew had promised not to tell her what had happened, she wanted to do that herself when she felt able to. * * * * * * * * * * * * Tamara stepped out of the complex for the last time and thought back to how she had arrived here in her shattered male body. She would never have imagined that she would have ever been grateful to face the world again, after the revelations of that January night. She had felt she had lost everything. Well she had, but now she had everything to gain again and was looking forward to discovering herself and life again, this time as a woman. She knew she would cope! She, and it WAS she now, felt comfortable about regarding herself this way. With the help of the Dr. Frobisher, she had managed to find a flat and a job in Edinburgh and it was there that she was heading now as the four-wheeled drive car waited for her to take her back to the mainland. The job was nothing special, she would be working as a receptionist in a travel agency. All SHE was qualified for now was menial clerical, waitressing, or shop work, but this didn't bother her! She was just pleased at being alive and at having a new start in life. She was also very excited at the challenge she would have in achieving it! This time she could prove that she could make it, even without her mother's money. Matthew had offered to find her something down south, possibly even working for him, but Tamara turned it down. She wanted to make it as Tamara on her own - she had still retained Matthew's stubbornness all right!. The three and a half years she had spent since the accident, had provided her with all the physical necessities she needed to live in the outside world as a woman. Even including the possibility of becoming pregnant if that was her desire. The last three months had helped her to mentally accept the enforced changes inflicted upon her, and she now regarded herself as female. She now needed to LIVE as a female to finally become what she now wanted to be, no schooling or counselling could ever provide that. Even the thoughts of a relationship with a man were no longer abhorrent! * * * * * * * * * * * * Dr. Frobisher held the door open for the beautiful young woman as she eased herself into the car seat. She looked gorgeous, he thought, in her short charcoal grey dress. She definitely showed a penchant for wearing dresses as opposed to anything else. He watched her well shaped legs swing into the seat and felt a stirring of arousal which surprised him a little for he had known about her past. Mary had told him everything, she had to on a professional basis - it might have affected her long-term treatment - but had sworn him to secrecy for the sake of Tamara's recovery. "Thank you Doctor, thank you for saving my life" she said as she took his hand in a typically feminine gesture. "Well, you've exceeded all our expectations - I just hope that, one day, we can continue this work to help others" he said sadly as he contemplated the imminent shutdown of this facility. The electric window started to close and the car reversed to give itself room to turn. Something snapped in his mind as Dr. Frobisher ran to the car and banged on the passenger window. It slid open again as Tamara gave him a quizzical look. "Look, I know it's most probably unethical but" he paused a little awkwardly, "I would like to see you again" he said wondering if he had gone too far. He felt a little shocked at how, despite her history, he really wanted to see her again, he really wanted her! The young woman looked up at him, through her thick lashes, and a mischievous smile crossed her face as she replied. "I think I would like that Doctor - or should I call you Andrew - I think I would like that a lot" she said as she used an eye pencil to scribble down a telephone number on a piece of paper that she handed to him. * * * * * * * * * * * * Epilogue * * * * * * * * * * * * Tuesday 15th October, 2009 Edinburgh, Scotland Tamara was busy in the kitchen cooking a meal and reflecting on the last eighteen months, as she was want to do at moments like this. She had found it much harder than she had anticipated to start her new life. She had settled into her nice little flat and started the job as a receptionist, which just about enabled her to pay her own way. She smiled wryly, as she thought about the little details that she had never even considered in her quest to climb the ladder again, the ladder to both a successful life and career. She had never thought about how much money it would take to maintain her life as a woman. She was spending much more that she had planned to on clothes, make-up and all the little 'necessities' she now needed if she wanted to fit in. The peer pressure from other women had unsettled her at first. She had made some girlfriends and now spent her time with them, as any woman would. She gossiped, went shopping, took lunch, moaned about her periods and even double dated. Andrew Frobisher had called her and had taken her out a couple of times, about a month after she had settled in. This had been another milestone in her new life but not for the reasons she might have expected. He had been awkward with her, almost as if he was struggling with himself. She had put it down to his feeling compromised by his professional relationship with her, not suspecting anything else could be amiss. The most surprising thing was the feelings she felt when he hadn't tried to take it any further. She had been nervous about what would happen if he tried to seduce her but when he didn't try she had felt hurt and rejected, wondering if he just didn't find her attractive enough. After he had left that last night she realised, in a moment of self revelation, that she had viewed this whole incident from the perspective of a woman, not the as a man she had been! She knew, from her former standpoint, that any man would not have been that choosy if offered the chance of sex with even a half way attractive female and, without being arrogant, she knew she was much better than half way! No, she knew that she had wanted him. She had desired him, sexually. More to the point she knew that even now, in the cold light of day, she stilled wanted him and felt sad that she hadn't had the opportunity to consummate this feeling but ecstatic that she now felt fully female, female through and through. She knew that she WAS now a woman and she knew that she wanted a man in her life. She finally lost her newly created virginity to, what was now her boyfriend Colin, and was now cooking this meal for him, anticipating another night of passion. She felt a warmth spread through her groin as she thought about this and how much more she enjoyed sex as a girl. It was so much more all encompassing than it she had been used to, and she really loved the feeling of total surrender as her man claimed her each time. She had come a long way. * * * * * * * * * * * * She had visited her family about eight months after her release from Luing and, after the awkward first few moments, had held her former girlfriend Katrina, as they shared tears of joy, sympathy and love. Matthew even became a little jealous of the new bond that was forming between his wife and his sister! Tamara had found a new joy in sharing time with Katrina and had spent happy days taking shopping trips and playing with her nephew, now her Godson. Her mother had surprised her at how easily she had accepted the children's story, from the original impersonation to this final moment of confession. She had slowly recovered from her own illness and was just grateful to have her family back together, in any form or configuration. Her family was complete again even if her son was now her daughter and her daughter her son - she loved them both. This time the only tears they shed, were tears of joy as Tamara waved goodbye to her family as she went through the departure gate for her trip back to Edinburgh. Despite their entreaties she did not want to return down south again, at least not yet, anyway. She had a life and friends now and, beside, she was looking forward to seeing Colin again. * * * * * * * * * * * * Her climb back up the ladder hadn't happened in every way though. She had climbed a number of rungs in regaining her personal life but her climb back up the career ladder had eluded her. She had intended to study and regain the qualifications she had originally had the autumn after her move to Edinburgh but, with her burgeoning social life it hadn't quite happened. She was having too much fun just being one of the girls and she found that she didn't seem to have the time to do both and decided to put it off for another year. Well that year had passed now and she still hadn't enrolled for this year's curriculum. Somehow it didn't seem so important now. Her job wasn't the best paid but she had no real pressure and she found her colleagues, and the friends she had made there, were more important to her right now. "Besides", she thought to herself with a delicious nervous anticipation as she walked into Bruce, carrying the coq au vin she had slaved over, "I've got a feeling he's going to propose to me tonight!". As she sat down, and saw Colin's smile, she knew that she loved the life she now had - she couldn't have been forced to return to her former life by anybody now. She WAS Tamara and loved being so. The End