This is actually a serious piece. The purple text indicate exuberant flights of fancy and imagination on the part an 11year old boy expressing a joyful but feminine personae. (He can't help it. this is the real Rainbow. ) People around him worry, oppress and even regard him as a threat. When I was very young I might been a little bit like Rainbow until I had it beaten out of me. Is there a better way?..

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Rainbow by Larkin

Part 2:

My brother hates me, My mother is threatening to send me back to therapy. The girls at school act all snotty and the boys want to kill me..No wonder I have to invent a world of my own. In that world, something changed. I was the center of the whole world and now there is Marko.

Marko was all rough and sloppy and dirty like a rebel in the movies. Instantly he had become my hero. I wish we could runaway together. I could get into the worst trouble in the world and he would come and rescue me. Marko is brave and courageous. We would steal and airplane and fly to a tropical island.. I don't care as long as I can be with him.

Over breakfast, my Mother said, "Richard! What the hell is the matter with you? You eat like a damn bird and one minute you're flying high the next minute you're in the dumps. Please finish your cereal and hurry, the school bus will be here any minute.

It's not like me but I was withdrawn into myself all day long. My homeroom teacher, one of the few people who likes me, came by and felt my forehead to see if I had a fever. The real problem was that I was worried.

How and where I would find Marko. I'm afraid that I will never find him ever, ever again. If I don't, I know I will die on the front lawn of Lincoln Middle School.

At the end of the day, dejected, I was shuffling home. Marko pulled up alongside of me on his bike. I immediately came back to life.

He was smiling, "Are you a boy or a girl?"

We both laughed and he said, "Well don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

I hopped on his bike and was encircled with his arms.

Looking up at him I said, "Show me where you live. I didn't know where to find you and I was afraid I'd never find you again."

We rode off together. I couldn't believe how happy I was. I wanted all the other kids to see me with Marko.

I was being kidnapped and running away at the same time. My belly was filled with pure excitement.

I pulled myself close and talked into his ear about this stuff and that stuff and he laughed and said, "Rainbow, anybody ever tell you, you even talk like a girl?"

I know my voice is high but there's nothing I can do about it.

We turned left at the Pizza Explosion take-out and at the end of the block was Marko's house. He dropped me and the bike.

It turned out that Marko apartment wasn't exactly an apartment. Up on a large utility shelf at the back of the garage was his fort like hide-away.

"I built it myself."

He looked at me and said, "I've been banned from the house cause I was always fighting with my sister."

Smiling at me he said, "She's a little bitch."

At the far end, he climbed a ladder and crawled through a tunnel made of canvas and plywood. I followed closely behind. It opened up into the little room the size of his bed with, his clothes and sleeping bags and blankets all around. Marko clicked on a string of Christmas lights that suddenly made the room magical. It smelled like sneakers and Marko's. I didn't mind or anything except, it gave me this thrilling urge to snuggle. At first we sat next to each other resting against pillows and wall. It was here that we would get to know each other.

I know it wasn't like my room all pretty with a window to look out of.

It was Marko's secret hide-out,

Marko's little house was like a rocket ship traveling through space,

Or a ship sailing on a great ocean,

And inside, it was just Marko and me.

I got up close and looked into his face.

He smiles at me and makes me feel so good.

We were going away, just Marko and me.

We were going to a land where people can be free, Marko and me.

and we will be so happy, just Marko and me.

Marko had hair destruction, not all straight and neat like mine.

I told him, "Marko. I cut mine myself, If you want I could cut your hair."

He was getting just a little peach fuzz on his chin and under his nose. "Do you have to shave yet?"

He said, "Nope."

"Where's that ring you wear in your nose?"

Marko reached into a little wooden box and sorted through it until he found it. He called it his slave ring. I watched while he put it in between the two holes on his nose.

I said, "I want one so I can be like you."

Marko laughed. "Rainbow, they're already looking for an excuse to throw a net over you anyway, but what the fuck. First thing you have to get your nose pierced with the needle---"

I screamed and then hugging Marko burying my face in between his chest and his arm. We both started laughing and couldn't stop.

There was a pause where our faces were just inches apart. For the first time in my life I have found someone doesn't hate me for being silly. I pulled closer so that I was laying half on and half off Marko. He didn't seem to mind and I hugged him.

I was thinking to myself, "Why am I so happy?"

"Marko, do you like me?"

 

Marko was suddenly looking so serious. "Rainbow, You don't know me very well, but I am seriously fucked up cause I see the world differently"

He looked unhappy and alone, I saw it in his eyes.

He said to me, "Rainbow, you're fucked up like me, maybe that's what we see in each other."

He looked like he was sorry about what he had just said. "Rainbow, they are all assholes and they are lying about everything." 

I couldn't make my thoughts into words like him, but I felt what he said was true. No one had ever affected me this way. 

He twisted his mouth and said, "Ya know, I hate adults." 

He paused for a moment and then said, "I can't help it. I hate all teachers, priests, psychologists and mothers. They are all evil. They punish anyone who strays from their fake fucked up world." 

I said, "They're not all that way."

He grudgingly said, "Rainbow, look at yourself, you're just tryin to be yourself and everybody is kickin you. That's why I'm on your side.."

I had never heard anything like that before. I didn't really understand it but it lit a fire inside of me. He was cocky and bad but I could see underneath. From that moment on I knew I wanted to be with Marko and no one was going to stop me.  He didn't look like everyone else and he didn't act like anyone I had ever known. 

He said, "Rainbow, you don't wanna hang with me because I am seriously fucked up."

I whispered to him, "I don't care."

He nodded and said, "Okay, it's your funeral."

 

 

Continued only upon request.... jet2larkin [ at ] g mail [d o t ] com

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