Date: Sat, 06 Jan 2007 11:23:10 -0500 From: Angel J Subject: Justin's Angel-20 This is a sexually explicit story (at times) involving homosexuality. By continuing to read, you affirm under penalties of perjury that you are not a minor or in the company of a minor and are entitled to have access to this story. The following is a fictious story with no real basis or credibility.It is solely for the enjoyment of the reader. It does not imply anything about the sexual preferences or lifestyle of Justin Timberlake or any other celebrity herein mentioned in this story. Previously Michael got up out of his lap,Justin started rising out of the chair,taking one last look at the photographs on the desk. When his eyes fell on the last one on the shelf,he froze in shock. Michael looked at his,seeing the shocked look on his face,all the color had dissappeared from his face. "Justin,what is it,you don't look well." Justin continued to stare at the picture. Michael followed his gaze to the last picture. "What's wrong,Justin?" Justin pointed at the picture. "Who is that with you in that picture,Michael." Michael pulled the picture down,looking at it.He saw the young man beside him,his smiling face flooding Michael's memory. "That was a good friend of mine,Jus.His name was Daniel." Justin looked into Michael face. "Was?" Michael's eyes lowered,Justin saw sorrow building in them. "He died,Justin." Justin sat back down in the chair,his head lowering.Michael becoming concerned for him. He knelt down in front of Justin,taking his hands in his. "Baby,whats wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost." Justin's head came up slowly,his unsure eyes staring back at Michael. "I have Michael.I saw him in my dream." Michael's breath caught in his throat,he started trembling. "Daniel,is your guardian angel,Michael.He's the angel from my dream." Chapter 20 Justin stood still staring at Michael,his silence was beginning to unnerve Justin. Then Michael started trembling again,Justin grabbing hold of him,guiding him over to the bed, both men sitting down. Michael looked at Justin,confusion registering in his eyes "That's impossible Justin,how could he be in your dream if you've never met him or ever seen him before.That's impossible?" Justin stared at Michael,both men still in shock. "I don't know Michael, all I know is it was Daniel that I talked to in my dream.I would remember his face anywhere.Believe me with all my heart,it was him.Thats why I was so shocked by the picture." Michael sat staring down at his hands.He was starting to rub the scar on his right hand again,a sure sign that he was upset. "Its true then, what Daniel wrote me was all true,he always knew then what his destiny would be." Justin didn't know what Michael was talking about,he was getting worried. Justin put his arm around Michael,letting him know he was there for him. This was as much a shock for Justin as it was for Michael. How could someone he had never met seek him out in a dream,and why.Besides the fact that the man was dead. Justin though that it had to be more than a dream,maybe something more was at work here,maybe even something miraculous. But first he had to find out who Daniel was, and what had happened to him. "I believe there is more going on here that just a dream,Michael.Why would Daniel be your guardian angel? Who was he, and what happened to him?" Justin saw that tears were forming in Michael's eyes,that this was another painful memory for Michael. Michael took a deep breath,turning to Justin,looking into his loving eyes. Michael was looking for Justin's love,needing it to guard him again his pain. He found it there as always in his eyes. Justin was waiting for him to talk,to tell him everything. "He was a young man I met when I taught a writing class at an urban high school two years ago. A friend from college got me involved with the youth program at the school.It was mostly underprivileged,lower class,troubled youths. I wanted to give something back to less fortunate young adults.I wanted to help them.I guess you could say it was a way of dealing with my own painful youth.Maybe I could give them a chance at making a better life for themselves,better than I had.I don't know.All I know is that I liked teaching,I think I would of made a pretty good teacher." Justin smiled, he was sure Michael would of made a damn fine teacher. "But Daniel's death changed all that." Justin could see the hurt in Michael's eyes,but he waited patiently knowing Michael would tell him everything about Daniel. Michael thoughts were flying backward to two and a half years earlier.He started telling Justin what had happened. TWO AND A HALF YEARS EARLIER Michael Tavarro was happy.For the first time in a long time he felt at peace with his life. His schooling was going well,he was excelling in all his classes.He had two stories publish in the college newspaper,and an editorial in the Chicago Sun Times. He was beginning to believe himself a writer. And now here he was a teacher's aide teaching a class on advanced writing skills to a high school class for extra credit. Everything had been going well for the first three weeks,his interaction with the younger kids was working well.He saw some great promise in some of the students,as well as a couple of the usual trouble makers. But he had handled them well, most of the other students getting used to his style of teaching. Michael's own style was to let the student discover his or her own potential.No boundaries,no limits. He stressed that from the beginning. They had liked him because he wasn't much older than themselves,his being only 23 while most of them were 16 to 18 years in age. They could relate to his easy going manner,his ability to see their point of view in their writings and in their vocal assignments. He had assigned them their first essay and he had spent the last two days grading these stories. One story ,which stunned him, he had re-read three times.It totally blew him away.The story,its detail,its dramatization,everything about it was totally engrossing. He felt this young man was more gifted than Michael himself.He couldn't believe the depth of emotion that poured from the writing. He had shown it to the teacher in charge of the class as well as his own college professor yesterday. Both had grasped the freshness and openess of the writer,the depth of his writing.All three agreed that the story was indeed publishable and that Michael should be the one to tell the young man. So here sat Michael waiting for Daniel Ortez to see him after school. Michael sat thinking about the young man,whom he had gotten to know really well in a short time. Daniel was eighteen,hispanic,handsome,with a smile that could melt any girl or boy's heart. Michael himself wasn't attracted to him in that way,Daniel not really being his particular type.If Michael couldn't even think about that aspect of his life again,much less have those feelings again. But the two of them had struck up a good friendship,an open one at least. MIchael looked up as he heard the door open to his classroom. Daniel came strutting in,flashing his big grin. "Hey teachie, you wanted to talk to me." Michael smiled back,telling him to pull up a chair.Daniel had started giving him crazy pet names like that. Michael just asked him to call him Michael. Daniel sat down beside him,his happiness infecting Michael. This boy was so optimistic,so full of life. "I asked you here to talk to you about your story.I am giving them all back to everyone tomorrow and I wanted to be the first one to congratulate you.Your the only person who's getting an A plus." Daniel beamed,his smile increasing. "Wow,really,you thought it was that good?" "Daniel,its more than good,its exceptional.In fact,I have talked to Mr.Landis as well as someone else I know and we all agree that you should publish it.I have a friend who works for my college newspaper,I could give it to him if you like." Daniel's face changed suddenly, his smile vanishing. "No its okay,Michael.Please don't do that,just give it back to me." Michael was shocked that Daniel wouldn't go ahead with publishing it. "But Daniel,your gifted.I am in awe of what your story means.Its fantastic.You have a great gift,don't throw it away." Daniel's head lowered,Michael sensing something wasn't right. "What's wrong,Daniel?" "I can't let you do that for me.It's my father.He doesn't want me wasting my time doing stupid things like writing.He wants me to be a man,to concentrate on sports.You know I am on the baseball team,right? I have great potential,or at least the coach says I do." Michael felt a twinge in his heart.This sounded so familiar,almost like his own early life. Michael leaned into Daniel,showing his concern for him. "Don't let someone tell you what you want in life,Daniel.Talk to your father,Daniel.Show him this story,let him read it.If you want,I can talk to him too,give him my side of this." "No, you shouldn't get involved with him,Michael.My dad's not the listening type." Michael felt something else now,he felt Daniel's fear,his fear of his own father. Michael felt he needed to reach out to this young man,to help him. He felt a kinship with him,as if their lives were parrallel to each other. "Listen Daniel,what are you doing right now,after school." "I am free all evening,I was going to go do some batting practice." "Well,why don't you come home with me,back to my place.We'll grab a pizza and talk." "Okay,Mikey Doo Doo .That sounds good." Michael smiled at him,laughing,Daniel smiling back. They left the school,heading back to Michael's home. When they got there,Michael introduced him to Vicky and the three of them spent a couple of hours eating,laughing and just having fun. Michael knew he had to talk to Daniel privately,to get him to open up.Vicky and Michael had worked out signals to let each other know when they wanted the other to leave.Michael set his signal off,Vicky recognizing it immediately. vicky faked a late lecture so she could leave them alone. Michael and Daniel chatted for a while,the discussion eventually turning to family. Michael felt if he opened his own soul up to him,maybe Daniel could talk about his own life. He told him some things about his early life,about his own father.In the end,being so comfortable with Daniel, he told Daniel all about the abuse,the physical and emotional abuse. Daniel had tears in his eyes, listening to everything Michael said about his father,even hugging him when it threatened to overwhelm Michael.This was the first person he had told this part of his life to.But he still couldn't bring himself to tell Daniel about his mother's death or about Paul.That was just too painful. Daniel listened till Michael had finished. When it was done,Daniel began his own story. It almost mirrored his own. Daniel's father had also been abusive,hitting him constantly.His mother had died when Daniel was five,he had no other family.So he had to bear it all on his small shoulders.He had to struggle through it all alone.Daniel felt for some reason that his father hated him. Michael felt a bond with this young man,a kinship of pain. The two of them talked till almost eleven.Telling themselves hidden secrets,hidden hopes. Michael had found a true friend.And Daniel had found one too. When they parted that night,Michael felt like this had helped him more that Daniel.Michael felt that he had done something for himself.He had been given hope,Daniel had a way of making you see the light of life.His optimism was contagious. Michael went to bed that night feeling that part of his soul was alive again. It didn't last long. The next day Daniel wasn't at school.Or the next day either. For three days their was no sign of him.Michael went to the office where he was told that Daniel had called informing the school that he sick. Michael wasn't buying it. Through some friendly persuasion,and a little flirting,he was able to get Daniel's address from the secretary. After classes Michael went in search of Daniel.In search of the truth. His address lead him to a seedier part of the city,a rundown development.Michael walked up four flights of stairs,stopping at the filthy door of Daniel's apartment.He knocked,waiting for someone to answer. He knocked and knocked,with no reply.He waited. He was almost going to give up,when he heard a voice at the end of the dark hallway. It was Daniel,he was in the stairwell doorway,beckoning for Michael to come with him. Michael walked down the hallway,Daniel turning and ascending the stairs,going up. Michael followed him up until they were on the rooftop,going out the doorway into the late afternoon sunshine. Daniel walked over to the far end of the terrace leaning against the railing looking out at the surrounding area. "What are you doing here,Michael?" "I was worried about you,Daniel.You haven't been to school in three days.Whats going on?" Michael could see a sleeping bag and Daniel's bookbag hidden in a corner of the roof. "Did you sleep up here last night?" "Yes,Michael.I couldn't go home,not after what happened the night I left your place." Michael tensed,dreading to hear what Daniel's fate had been. "I told him,Michael.I told him about my writing,about your praise,about how I could be a great writer someday." Michael walked over to him,seeing that he was starting to cry. "He beat me,Michael.He beat me with his belt." Michael rushed up to him,putting his arms around him.Daniel screamed,pulling away from him,in obvious pain. Michael pulled Daniel's shirt up,seeing the red welts on his chest and back.The man had been brutal. "Oh,god,Daniel.You have to go to a hospital." "No Michael, please,no.I don't want anyone to know.I am so ashamed." Michael was crying now,knowing how Daniel felt,being in the same place himself so long ago. "Where's your father,Daniel." The anger was rising in Michael. "he went to work today, so he's probably finished,and out drinking at a bar somewhere.I ran away last night,Michael.I didn't have anywhere to go,so I slept up here last night." "Your coming home with me,your not staying here tonight." Daniel's tears were starting again. "I can't Michael.I can't go with you.Because of what happened yesterday,you will hate me." Michael tensed,fearing that Daniel had done something to his father. "What are you talking about? What happened,Daniel?" "He didn't give me all these lashes because of my writing,Mikey.Most of these he gave me last night because of what I confessed to him,what he made me tell him." Michael looking into Daniel's deep brown eyes,seeing a look of fear. "What did you tell him,Daniel?" Daniel looked down,silence echoed across the rooftop. "I told him I was gay.And that I was in love with someone." Michael stood still,stunned. "Its you,Michael.I have fallen in love with you." Daniel sank down onto the rooftop,sobbing into his chest. Michael sat down beside him,gently pulling him into his arms,not wanting to hurt him.Daniel held onto him,needing him as a life line. "Oh,Daniel.Don't be ashamed or upset because of who or what you are.I am okay with you being gay.I am just a little shocked that I am the object of your affection.I will be truthful with you also,my friend.I'm also gay." Daniel looked up into Michael's eyes.Seeing only truth there,and deep caring. He couldn't help himself, he put his lips to Michael's kissing him tenderly. Michael was shocked,but he didn't want to pull away from Daniel,to upset him even more.He couldn't tell him just then that the feelings weren't returned. He let Daniel kiss him,Daniel finally breaking the kiss. "Thank you Michael.Thank you for being honest with me.I now realize that you don't love me in return." Michael put his own head down,then looked back up at Daniel. "I am sorry,Daniel.Your my friend.And you always will be.First and foremost I am your friend.But I can't love you like you want me to.I am sorry." Daniel smiled at him,his first smile all afternoon. "Its okay,Michael.I can't fault you for telling me the truth.And your right,you are my friend.Your my best friend." "Then let me help you.Let me take you back to my place,get you cleaned up.And we will talk about what to do next." Daniel smiled at him. "Okay,Mister Mike." Michael helped him up,helping him all the way down the stairwell,calling a cab when they were outside. When they got back to Michael's apartment,Michael and Vicky both helped Daniel get cleaned up,treating his wounds with tender care.Vicky was a ball of seething anger,and Michael wasn't far behind her.After Daniel was half way presentable they talked to his as friends,finally convincing Daniel to call the police. For an hour they talked to a police officer,and then the police drove Michael and Daniel to the hospital. Daniel's father was picked up that evening and charged with aggravated assault. FOr the next two months Daniel stayed with Michael,their friendship growing steadily. Daniel's essay was published in Michael's college newspaper,and then picked up by the Chicago Tribune. Daniel was beyond happy and Michael was proud of him. Both of them realized that they would always be friends,nothing more.But that was cool with them,they loved each other enough not to overstep that boundary. Through it all Daniel never lost his optimism,his smile and happy demeanour,making both Michael and Vicky smile more. On graduation day at his school,Michael and Vicky had a small party for Daniel at Vito's.He had graduated school with top honors.He had been accepted for college and was going in the fall. They presented Daniel with a framed picture of his Chicago Tribune story. Daniel was beyond thrilled,hugging Michael and Vicky. That night was one of the happiest for Michael. They laughed all night,enjoying each other's company. On the way home from Vito's Daniel wouldn't shut up,laughing and hugging Michael,kissing Vicky.He was so happy,Michael felt his whole life lay ahead of him.Everything was open to him,Michael could sense it in his heart.He was so happy for Daniel. Then suddenly another feeling came over Michael,a feeling of dread.He couldn't make out what it was,what he felt. They were almost at their front doorstep,when a man walked out of the shadows,standing in front of them,his head was lowered. All three of them stopped,Daniel had his hand in Michael's,his other hand held the picture frame. He turned his head,seeing the man,as the man raised his head and his arm. "Dad?"Daniel said. In his father's hand was a gun. One loud shot shattered the night,the bullet hitting Daniel in the chest,propelling him backwards pulling Michael down with him.Vicky screamed. Victor Ortez turned, running down the street,dissappearing in the darkness. The picture frame landed on the pavement,shattering,like Daniel's lost dreams. Michael pulled himself up,crawling over to Daniel's twitching body. He pulled Daniel into his arms,seeing the blood gushing out of his chest,pushing his hand into the wound,trying to stop the bleeding.Daniel's eyes opened,searching for Michael's. "Its ok,Daniel.Its ok,your going to be ok,you've got to be ok.We're going to get you help." People were rushing over,pulling out cell phones,dialing for an ambulance.Another lady was holding Vicky,trying to calm her down. Shortly Michael could hear and ambulance in the distance. Michael felt in his soul that it would be too late for his friend. Daniel looked up at Michael. "Why?" Michael's eyes were burning with tears,sobs threatening to overtake him. Why,did he do it? I didn't hate him,Mikey.I just wanted to live my life." Michael started sobbing. "Mikey,promise me something?" Michael looked deep into Daniel's wet brown eyes. "Anything,Daniel." "Promise to live it for me." Michael hugged Daniel to him,feeling his life force draining away. "I love you,Daniel.I love you." Daniel smiled. "Love ya back....Mikey ..." Michael felt him go,he lay there on the pavement,holding his dead friend in his arms,sobbing. Present Justin was openly crying, Michael holding onto him now. Michael wiped the tears from Justin's eyes. "He was my friend,Jus.And so much more." Justin smiled a loving smile. He believed in how much Daniel had meant to Michael,his friendship and his beliefs. Michael got up,returning to the desk,pulling down the picture and also retrieving a book from the second shelf. He walked back over to the bed,snuggling again beside Justin. Both of them looked at the picture. "This was taken at the party that night,its the only one I have of him.Do you see his smile,its so full of life,promise and hope.Up until his last breath he lived life,Jus.He never gave up. And I have tried to keep that promise to him.I have tried to live his life. He was so gifted,Jus.His writing was something unbelievable.he wrote from his heart,all about his youth,his hardships. I want you to read his story,to hear his words. His story gave me the courage to be myself,to try and write about my own life.The book I finally wrote was a combination of both his and my life.It was the only thing I could do to honor him,to honor his friendship and his love for me." Michael started crying again,Justin hugging him close to him.Justin held him quietly,knowing all he could do was hold him until he cried himself out. After a long twenty minutes,Michael's crying stopped. Michael then picked up the book which he had laid on the bed. Justin recognized it as Michael's novel. "Read the dedication,Jus." Justin opened the book. Dedicated to Daniel Ortez You were right,my friend Life is for the living Justin smiled,knowing what those words now meant to Michael.That he was trying to live up to his promise, that he was going to go on, to live in a world of hope and love. And Justin wanted to give that love to Michael every day for the rest of their lives. Michael smiled back at Justin,taking the book out of his hand. He opened it again,flipping through it until he found a folded letter which had been stuck between two pages. He pulled out the letter,setting his book down. "They never caught his father,Justin.He dissappeared." Justin sat there,stunning,not believing that that bastard was still out there somewhere. "I walked around for two weeks after Daniel's funeral hating that man,wanting to kill him for what he did to his own son.I couldn't believe he took my Daniel away from me.Vicky saw the pain I was in,the hurt I felt,helpless to do anything to help me." Justin looked up at Michael. "You said- my Daniel,Mikey?" Michael looked into Justin's eyes. "He was mine,Jus.He became a part of me.I loved him,not the way I love you,but as a brother,as the younger brother I never had.I wanted to do so much for him,to make all his dreams come true.He never got the chance." Justin realized that Daniel had really meant so much more to Michael.Michael felt he had lost his brother. "One day,about three weeks after Daniel's death, I was alone in the apartment,I was cleaning out the closet in my bedroom,making room to store some old books I had,when I found it.It was Daniel's book bag.I had completely forgotten about it.He carried it with him everywhere,it contained everything that was important to his life." Michael got up going to the bottom drawer of his desk.he came back with a weather worn bag,one strap was missing. He opened the bag,pulling out a sweater,a Chicago Bears ball cap,and some books.Justin picked up the books seeing that they were writing books,and that a lot of handwriting was contained in them. "These are Daniel's journals.I have read them all.They are a synopsis of his feeling and dreams.The young man was so in tune with his life,Jus." Justin felt that he himself wanted to read these books,to feel what Daniel had felt,to really get to know the young man.That gifted ,talented.sweet young man. "If its okay,babe,could I read them?I want to hear his words myself." Michael smiled at Justin,a tear in his eye again. "Yes,Jus.You can read them,after you read this letter.I found it in the last book,it was folded neatly after the last page.It was written the morning of Daniel's death." Justin looked at Michael,sensing something important was written here. Justin took the letter from Michael,Michael getting up and standing in front of the window,looking out again on the white world outside. "Go ahead,Justin,read it." Justin looked at Michael,and then turned his eyes to the hand written letter. "My dear sweet,Michael. If you've read all these journals of mine,you now know the real me. God help you.Ha,ha. Just kidding. I have told you all of it mostly anyway.Included in there are all my feeling for you,about my past and about my life. Put I haven't written or told you my feelings about my future. I believe,my dear friend,that I will not have one. I have been having some deep feelings lately.Feelings of impending change.I don't know what that curtails but it does mean that I may be leaving you ,maybe forever. At first I was scared,afraid to be away from you.You have been more than a friend to me.I love you,dear Michael. I have lived these past few months in heaven because every day I was able to see your sweet smile,and feel your loving tenderness.It was enough for me,Mikey. Thank you,Michael.For being my friend and believing in me. I don't know where this faithful path leads me,but I feel in my heart that even if I have to leave you,that I will be with you always,its our shared destiny. Don't be afraid Michael,don't be angry either.Don't let hatred and fear rule your life.You can't undo the past. You can't save me from him.Its my destiny. Live your life,Michael. Live it to the fullest and I will be right there beside you,loving you and watching over you. Never forget that I love you,dear Michael. Let your heart fill with love,and I will be there to see your true love show himself. Let your soul fill with happiness and you will be loved by him forever. Love him,sweet angel. He will love you Jus as much. Love ya forever,dear brother. Daniel Justin looked up at Michael.Michael was looking at him,a look of acceptance on his face. Michael walked over to him,kneeling in front of him. "He knew Justin, he somehow knew he was going to die by his father's hand.I feel it in his words,in his acceptance of it. And he knew he would become my guardian angel. He said,in his own words-I will be with you always,its our shared destiny. And he knew that you,you my love, would enter my life and become my true love. Look at the last sentence,Jus. He will love you "Jus" as much. He called you by name,Justin." Justin looked again at the letter,rereading it,realizing Michael's keen observation of the truth. It was all there,written down for both of them to see. Daniel's faith in his love for Michael,in his need to be with him forever.And Daniel's awareness of Justin. "I believe your dream was real,Justin.He did meet with you,to tell you what you needed to know.Please tell me what he said,Justin,please.I need to know." Justin looked up into Michael's pleading eyes,not wanting to tell him everything that Daniel had said,but he couldn't lie to his love,he couldn't deny him anything. So he pulled Michael up beside him,settling back into the bed,Michael in his familiar position,against his chest. "Alright,Michael.I will tell you everything,but some of it you may not like." Michael nodded,falling silent. Justin told him everything that Daniel had said.All his words about Justin having to save him from himself.About Michael's hardships ahead and more pain to come.About Michael having to make a choice.A choice that would heal him or kill him. Michael listened to all of it,every word that Daniel had said. "I don't know what he means about a choice,or what pain lies ahead for me.But I believe him about your role in this,my love.I need you here with me,I love you.I don't think you could ever deny me your love,Justin.I have totally faith and trust in you." Justin kissed Michael,their love flowing again through each other. No more words were spoken.They just held each other. Both lay there thinking about Daniel.About all they had both learned today. They both believed that this was something more,that Daniel was indeed with Michael,and he would watch over him. He would watch over both of them. Michael felt safe,knowing that Daniel was with him,and that Justin was with him even more. Justin felt that he was protected,protected by Daniel's love for Michael. Together he and Daniel would keep Michael safe until all this was finished. Whatever lay ahead,Justin would never deny his love for Michael. Together they lay,their arms around each other,lost in their love for each other,their eyes slowly closing,both falling into a light sleep. In the far corner of the bedroom two invisible figures stood,looking at both of the young men sleeping. Their eyes were filled with tears,tears for their beloved Michael. Some tears were of joy,joy that these two souls had found each other,that Justin loved Michael and now Michael had accepted his love for Justin. But some of the tears were for the pain,and sorrow to come. They couldn't stop fate,or stop god's designs. All they could do was be there for both of them.What happened in the end was Michael's choice. Daniel walked over to the bed,leaning down,kissing Michael lightly on his lips.Michael stirred a little,but not waking. Daniel then looked at Justin,and leaning over Michael,kissed Justin on his lips,a small smile erupting on his sleeping face. "My love is with you both,keep it in your hearts." He stood up again,turning and smiling at the other person. The other person walked over to the bed,looking down at both men. Tears were still in her eyes. The young beautiful woman stood still looking at her sweet child. Diana smiled at both of them,her love for both shining around her. "Sleep well my son,your true love will be there for you always,as well as Daniel and myself." End of Chapter 20 That was a bit rough,in the emotional sense. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Daniel is a personification of my younger boyfriend. He is a handsome young,hispanic,who makes my heart soar. Hope that's not a dissappoint for some of you. My heart is young and my love for him is young. Hope you liked the inclusion of Michael's mom. I am not going to get into philisophical discussions on suicide and god's view on it. I just wanted to include her love for him. She is his second guardian angel. A couple of people had already clued into it. Kudo's to your wise perception. More surprises to come next chapter. Keep the comments coming. Peace out,keep the faith. Angel.