Date: Wed, 12 Nov 2003 00:46:22 -0800 (PST)
From: slpwriter <slpwriter@yahoo.com>
Subject: Nick Lachey: My Everything-57

Hello to all of you!

I'm back with another chapter of "My Everything."

For those of you who aren't aware, my story is
eligible for nomination under "Extended Series" in the
9th Annual Boyband Story Awards. If you feel this
story deserves nomination, please go to the website
and vote for it.

Thanks for all of your support! Without it, I don't
think I could have written this story for this long.

Wish me luck on getting nominated. I'll find out who
will be nominated in a few weeks, if not sooner.
a

 Now on with the story.


First of all, let me just say that this is my first
time writing any kind of fiction like this.

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of total fiction and is not
meant to imply anything about the sexualities of Nick
and Drew Lachey or anyone else mentioned in this
story.

If you are too young to read this, or if Homosexuality
offends you, then please don't continue any further
and leave.

NEWSFLASH: To those of you who don't already know,
Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson, in real life, have
reconciled and are now husband and wife. I wish them
all the best with their marriage and hope they live a
long and happy life together.

If you want details about their wedding, check out the
98 Degrees Official Website at www.98degrees.com.


Other 98 Degrees stories I'd like to recommend are.

"Give Me Just One Night" by Unanoche.
"69 with Jeff Timmons" by Zachary Scott Pritt
"Nick Lachey" by Ken.
"98 Degrees Is Hot" by Gay Night
"The Reunion" by RinSong.
"Loving Nick Lachey" by Jordan
"Playing Doctor with 98 Degrees" by Brian
"This Gift" by Sprout

and finally:
"What I feel for you" by Thack.

"What I feel for you." is an awesome story and Thack,
himself deserves applause for all of his hard work on
it. I just finished reading it yesterday and I thought
that it was amazing. He was nominated for 8 different
categories, just like I was when my story was up for
nomination. I wish him all the best of luck with the
nominations and we'll see who wins this time around.



Now, I"ll let you get on with the story.

Enjoy.


Previously on "My Everything".....


The guys and Kandi all said their goodbyes to Ben and
left the house and headed to their cars. Danny got
into his, along with Jeff, while Drew, Justin, and
Kandi got into Drew's SUV, which Drew was driving this
time.

I was alone in my rental SUV. I started the engine and
waited for the guys to pull out so I could get out of
the driveway.

After they all pulled out, I was next. I waved goodbye
to Ben as I pulled out of the driveway and followed
the rest of the guys back to Nick's house.

When we got back, it was just after 11:00 in the
morning. It was almost time for lunch.

Drew parked his SUV into the driveway alongside
Jessica's car, while Danny pulled his in behind
Drew's. I pulled mine by the side of the road and shut
off the engine. By now, everyone was already rushing
into the house.

I locked up the SUV and ran up the driveway and into
the house. As I walked into the living room, I saw the
guys and Kandi huddled around Jessica. They were so
engrossed in whatever was going on that they hadn't
heard me come in.

I stopped where I was and backed into the kitchen and
hid around the other side of the doorway to listen.
That's when I heard Drew speak.

"So, Jessica, what is it that you needed us back here
so quickly for?" He asked her.

I peeked around the corner and saw Jessica walk over
to the television set, where she reached above it and
pulled down what looked like an envelope. She then
turned around and walked back to Drew and handed it to
him.

"What is this, Jessica?" Drew asked her.

"It's a letter." Jessica told him. "It's got no return
address. I'm afraid to open it."

"Who do you think it's from?" Drew said. Then he
looked at it again.

"Oh, my god!" I heard him say.

What is it, Drew?" Jessica asked, worriedly.

I took that moment to peek around the corner to see
what was wrong. I saw Drew standing there, staring at
the letter with his mouth open in shock.

"This letter." Drew said. "It's from Nick."



***********
CHAPTER 57
***********

Jessica's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Are you sure?" She asked Drew, desperately. "How do
you know it's from him?"

Drew held the envelope up to her and showed her the
front of it, where the letter said "Jessica" on the
front.

"Well, it is Nick's handwriting, Jessica." Drew said,
as he studied it, closely.

"Would you like me to read it outloud?" Drew asked
her. "Or do you want to read it to us yourself?"

Jessica thought about it for a moment, then held out
her hand.

"I'd like to read it, if you don't mind?" Jessica
said.

Drew handed her Nick's letter and she sat down on the
couch and looked at it for a moment. It was as if she
was afraid to open it because of what the letter could
contain in it. Finally, she summoned up all of her
courage she had left.

"Alright, here goes." Jessica said, as she started to
tear open the letter.

She pulled out the paper and started to read it.

"My Darling, Jessica,"

"I'm sure you're wondering where I am right now, as
well as how I am right now. I won't lie to you. I'm a
mess, babe. More now than I ever was."

"I'm writing you this letter to let you know that I'm
alright so you won't worry about me too much. I have
alot to sort out and I couldn't do it back in Los
Angeles with you and the guys. And I'm so sorry I had
to leave without letting you or the guys know."

"Sweetie, alot has happened recently, which has me so
confused and I can't decide what to do about it. All I
know is is that it's killing me to be away from you
and our precious little girl."

"I miss you and Nicole everyday that I'm gone, but
even that isn't enough to bring me back at the
moment."

"Baby, I can't be the husband I should be to you right
now. I can't be the father that I should be to Nicole.
And I certainly can't be Drew's brother or the best
friend that he and the rest of my friends need right
now, either.

There's something that you don't know. Something that
is going to hurt you, deeply, but for better or for
worse, I have to be honest with you. Even if it costs
me my marriage.

"I'm torn between my love for you and my feelings for
Sean, which have resurfaced. That means that I'm in
love with the both of you."

"As far as I know, Drew and Sean are now a couple and
I can't be around them right now. It hurts too much.
But I do want my brother to be happy. And if Sean is
that person, then I won't stand in the way of that.
That is something that Drew and Sean need to decide
for themselves."

"Please take care of our precious little girl and give
her a big hug and kiss for me, ok?"

"Take care of yourself and tell all of my friends that
I love them and how sorry I am that things had to turn
out this way."

Tell Drew that I love him and that I'll be in touch
when the time is right.

I love you, baby,

Nick.

Jessica stopped, her emotions starting to overwhelm
her over what she'd just read. Never did she dream
that her husband would be in love with Sean again. All
she knew was that she couldn't go on this way forever.

"I don't understand this." She wailed, shaking her
head in confusion. "How could something like this
happen?"

I chose that moment to come out of hiding.

"I'll tell you how."

The guys and Jessica turned around and saw me standing
in the doorway to the living room.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Jessica said,
angrily. "How long have you been here?"

"Long enough to have heard everything that Nick had to
say in that letter you just read." I said, quietly.

Jessica stood up and glared at me.

"How dare you listen in on a private matter!" She
said, her voice rising. "You are not family!"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head, wondering just how
catty Jessica could get.

"Will you give the dramatics a rest, Jessica?" I
asked, annoyed. "We need to concentrate on finding
your husband right now. Not fighting about who was
eavesdropping on who."

"I wouldn't be so dramatic if it wasn't for you!"
Jessica shouted. "You're the reason that my husband is
gone and may never come back!"

I saw Drew look back at me when Jessica said it. I
didn't like the look on his face. He was all serious.
It was like he believed Jessica.

"Drew, do you believe her?" I asked him. "Do you
really believe that I'm the cause of Nick's
disappearance?"

Drew just stood there, not saying a word. But I could
see it in his face. He couldn't even look at me. His
eyes shifted to the floor. He believed it. Either that
or something else was going on.

"Well, I said, starting to feel angry. "if that's how
you feel, then there's no reason for me to be here any
longer. Goodbye."

I turned to leave. As I did, I heard Danny call out to
me. I turned around  to look at him.

"What, buddy?" I asked him.

"Please, don't go." he said. "We all just became
friends again. We're not going to let you leave
again."

"What did you say?"

Everyone's eyes looked over at Jessica, who had asked
that question. She had a look of confusion on her
face, mixed with anger. She had no idea that the guys
and I had buried the hatchet.

"Are you telling me that you're actually going to
trust him again?" Jessica said, just before she
shrieked.

"YOU"RE ACTUALLY GOING TO LET THAT SLUT BACK INTO OUR
FAMILY?!"

I heard everyone gasp, just as I stood there with my
mouth hanging open, stunned by what she had just
called me.

"Jessica, stop!" Kandi exclaimed, in shock. "You're
only going to make things worse!"

Jessica whipped around towards Kandi and scowled at
her.

"Kandi, I don't see how things could get any worse."
She cried. "But to have Sean back in this family again
is the biggest mistake that you all could ever make!"

"All right, that's enough!"

I looked over to see Drew, looking back at Jessica,
with an angry look on his face.

"Jessica, This house is just as much mine as it is,
Nick's, so as long as Sean is a guest in this house,
you will treat him with respect." Drew said.

I could hear the authority in his voice. He meant it
and would accept no arguments. But Jessica didn't see
it that way.

"The hell I will!" Jessica said. "I can't respect a
man who has ruined my life! What he did to your
brother is unforgiveable!"

"Jessica, now you're just being ridiculous." Danny
told her, as he gazed at me.

 It was obvious that he was trying to stand up for me.
But I was able to fight my own battles. I'd been
through enough pain in my life, which had made me much
stronger and less afraid of things. What that
basically meant is that I was not going to be pushed
around anymore. Not by anyone. Least of all, by
Jessica.

"Danny, thanks for trying to defend me." I said. "it's
very noble of you, but I don't need to be defended. I
can fight my own battles."

Danny seemed a bit surprised by my words, but he
nodded, letting me know that he understood. I turned
back to Jessica.

"And as for you." I said. "I warned you to watch your
mouth when it comes to me. I'm not a slut."

"Oh no?" Jessica asked, sarcastically, then added.
"Well, let's see here."

She turned to Drew and pointed at him.

"There are two Lachey boys in this family and you've
had them all."

"Jessica?!" Justin exclaimed.

"Well, hasn't he?" Jessica asked him.

Justin didn't know what to say to that, so he didn't
say anything else.

I was really getting iritated now. Jessica was
beginning to get on my last nerve. I wasn't going to
stand there and listen to anymore of her ranting and
raving.

"All right, that's it." I said, turning and heading
for the door. I'm leaving."

"No, Sean, wait!" Danny called out to me. But I kept
going.

I'm sorry, Danny, I can't." I said as I made contact
with the door.

"Where are you going?" Jeff aked me.

I turned around, as my hand touched the doorknob.

"Anywhere, but here." I snarled, as I left and slammed
the door behind me.

All I knew was that I needed some air. I ran down the
driveway to my rental car and got in. I drove back to
Ben's house.

*******************************************************
BACK INSIDE THE LACHEY HOUSE........

Drew, Danny, Jeff, Justin, and Kandi could only stand
there in complete shock as they watched me leave the
house.

"Well, Jessica?" Drew asked, giving her an angry look.
"Are you happy now?"

"I am ecstatic, thank you." Jessica said, bitterly.
"The less I see of that pathetic little asshole, the
better."

Danny shook his head in disbelief at how rude and
bitchy Jessica was being. He didn't know what to do
about it, so he just gave up for the moment.

"Alright, I give up." He said, throwing up his hands.
"There's no reasoning with you is there, Jessica? You
are just too paranoid and insecure to even be civil to
Sean. We've all buried the hatchet with him. Why can't
you?"

Jessica could only gaze at Danny through angry eyes.
She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"I can't believe that you have to even ask me that?!"
She said, in disbelief. "Wouldn't you feel the same
way if Sean forced Jeff to leave everyone he cared
about all because he has feelings for his former love
and current one? And without being able to talk about
it with you?"

Danny shrugged.

"I don't know." He said. "I'm not in the position that
you're in, so I can't answer that."

"Exactly." Jessica said. "If you were in my position,
you would feel resentment towards Sean too if he were
the cause of you and Jeff being apart."

"But it's not the same thing, Jessica." Jeff said,
putting his hands on Danny's shoulders, massaging them
gently. "Sean and Danny were never romantically
involved. They were too close to ever be romantic.
They're like brothers."

"Yeah." Danny said. "It would have been too weird for
Sean and I to have been anymore than just friends.
Yes, I love him, but it isn't the same as what I feel
for Jeff."

Jessica shook her head in defeat.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore." She said,
with a sigh. "I'm going to go and check on my
daughter."

And with that said, she walked upstairs to her's and
Nick's room to check on Nicole.

 After she left, the guys and Kandi all looked at each
other, wondering what that was all about.

"Drew?"

"What, Kandi?" Drew asked her.

Kandi looking at Drew, intensely. As if she was trying
to read his mind or something.

"You know, I just can't seem to figure you out
sometimes." She said. "Just awhile ago, you and Sean
were talking about trying again at a relationship, and
the next thing you know, you get pissed with him for
some reason and don't even bother to tell us why. Then
Jessica blames Sean for Nick being gone and you can't
even stick up for him. Why is that?"

Drew crossed his arms, and scowled.

"Look Kandi, it's all plain and simple." He said,
trying not to lose it. "Sean doesn't want me. In fact,
I don't even think he knows what he wants. First he's
kissing me and telling me that he wants to try again
at a relationship with me and then the next minute,
he's pulling away, saying he isn't ready to be with me
again in every way. How the hell am I supposed to
react to that?"

"Drew, come on, the man was hurt by all of us, for
heaven's sake!" Jeff said, trying to get through to
him. "You can't expect him to just jump back into a
relationship and continue where he left off. It just
doesn't work that way."

"Well, he certainly had no trouble jumping in bed with
me, did he?" Drew said, bitterly, as tears rolled down
his cheeks.

 He wiped them away, only for them to be replaced with
more tears. Everyone looked at him, concern showing on
their faces.

Drew continued.

"He had sex with me in Orlando the night that we saw
him at that club. He seemed perfectly content then and
it wasn't bothering him then about a relationship with
me."

Drew walked over to the kitchen table, pulled out a
chair and sat down on it. He wiped away the rest of
his tears as he sat there, feeling confused and hurt.

"Drew, I don't think you should give up on Sean just
yet." Justin said. I know you probably don't see it
right now, but he does need you."

Drew looked up at Justin, the anger obvious in his
eyes.

"Oh no." Drew said, standing up. "I'm not what he
wants or needs right now. But I'm quite sure that Ben
will be."


BEN?!" Everyone said, in shock.

*******************************************************
BEN'S HOUSE...........

I pulled back into Ben's driveway and shut off the
engine. I sat there for a moment, thinking back to
everything that had happened back at Nick's house.

I was really disgusted with Jessica and her blaming me
for what happened with Nick. And I was even more
disgusted with Drew for agreeing with her.

 I had no doubt that I was part of the reason for
Nick's leaving, but I didn't force Nick to leave. He
did that all on his own.

Right then and there, I knew what I needed to do.

I got out of the car and walked up to Ben's door and
rang the doorbell.

The door opened and I was greeted with the figure of
Matt Damon, standing there.

"Matt?!" I asked, in surprise. After all I hadn't seen
him in two years.

"Sean?!" Matt asked, in shock. "Is that really you?"

"Yes, it is, buddy." I said, then opened my arms.
"Now, give me a hug already."

Matt grabbed me and hugged me so tight that I almost
thought he was going to crush me. It was obvious that
he had never forgotten about me and that he had missed
me a great deal these past two years.

"You know," Matt started, as he released me. "I could
be really furious with you right now, you know. But
thanks to Ben, I'm not. He told me the whole story
about what happened to you and why we lost touch."

I nodded. Then I looked up and took a good look at
him. He had really grown in two years. He looked like
he was working out more because he looked more buff
than he was when we'd first met.

"Does that mean you forgive me too?" I asked him,
hoping that he did.

"Yes, I do." He said, giving me that million dollar
smile of his. "Come on in."

He stepped aside so I could enter and once I was
inside, he shut the door behind me.

"Is Ben here?" I asked him.

"Yeah, he's upstairs in the bedroom." He said, with a
grin.

When I heard that, my face brightened.

"Does that mean that you both are back together?" I
asked him. "He told me that you two broke up about a
year ago just before Christmas."

Matt shook his head.

"No, we're not together again." He said, a hint of
sadness in his voice. "He's just upstairs getting
changed. He has a meeting with his agent to discuss an
upcoming role in a new movie that is going to be shot
here in L.A. and he's going to decide if he should
take the role or not."

"Oh." I said, a bit disappointed that he and Ben
hadn't become an item again.

"If you don't mind me asking, why did you and Ben
break up?" I asked him. "You both were great together
and I didn't think that anything could tear apart what
the two of you had."

Matt nodded.

"We just grew apart, Sean." He told me. "We were
working all the time and hardly got to see each other
much. As much as we loved each other, the stress of
trying to keep a relationship going, as well as
balancing out our working relationship was just too
much for the both of us to take, so we decided to part
as good friends."

"Do you still love him, Matt?"

Matt opened his mouth to answer me, but stopped. I saw
him glance up past me and I turned around and saw Ben
coming down the stairs. He was dress in an Armani
suit, complete with tie. He looked good too.

"Hey, Sean." He greeted me, as he came down the
stairs.

"Hey yourself, handsome." I said, as he came to stand
in front of me. "You look great."

"Thanks." Ben said, flashing me his cute smile. "I'm
headed out for a meeting with my agent to discuss a
new role in a new movie."

"Matt told me." I said, motioning to Matt with a nod.
"Good luck with that."

"Thanks." Ben replied, then frowned. "By the way, what
are you doing back so early anyway? I thought you were
going to stay with Drew, and the rest of the guys for
lunch?"

"Yeah, I was." I said, bitterly. "But Jessica ruined
any chance of that, all because I happened to overhear
her reading a letter from Nick to everyone in the
room, without them knowing I was even there."

"Jessica heard from Nick?" Matt asked outloud. "How is
he?"

"Not good." I told him. "Nick is a mess, emotionally
and it turns out that he is in love with both Jessica
and me."

That caused Matt's and Ben's eyebrows to go up in
surprise.

"Wow." Ben said, in amazement. "Now I understand why
he took off. He must be so lost and confused right
now. Have you or anyone else tried reaching Nick on
his cellphone."

"I'm sure everyone else has tried, but Nick must have
it turned off or is just not answering any of his
calls right now." I said, nodding my head.

Ben nodded. Then he looked at his watch.

"Shit!" He cursed. "I'm going to be late for my
meeting."

He then looked up at me.

"Sean, if you'd like, you can stay and make yourself
at home." He offered. "The tv remote is on the coffee
table in the living room, so you can watch tv if you'd
like."

He then glanced up at Matt.

"Can you stay with him, Matt?"

"Sure." Matt said. "I don't have to go anywhere for
awhile."

"Great." Ben said. "I'll see you both later then.

He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and also did the
same to Matt, before he left, closing the door behind
him.

Matt locked the door and turned around to face me
again.

"Well, Sean, what do you say we watch a little tv and
talk awhile?" He suggested.

"Sure." I said, with a smile. "Come on."

I walked into the living room to get comfortable. Matt
followed.

I was definitely going to make the most of this time
with Matt. we needed to talk and reconnect again in
order to get our friendship back on track.

*******************************************************
MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE LACHEY HOUSE............

"What does Ben have to do with any of this?" Jeff
asked, confused as to what Drew was implying.

Drew stood up and looked around at everyone.

"When we were leaving to come back here, I saw Sean
and Ben saying goodbye and then, I saw Ben kiss
Sean."Drew revealed. "And it wasn't your typical kiss
on the cheek kind of thing."

That revelation caused a few eyebrows to go up.

"Oh, so that's what this is all about." Danny said, a
grin on his face. "You're jealous."

"I am not!" Drew tried to say. But of course no one
was buying it.

"Yes, you are, hon." Kandi said. "If you weren't, you
wouldn't be so pissed off."

Then, a thought occurred to her.

"Are you sure it wasn't just a friendly peck on the
lips?" She asked him. "You know what they say:
Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss."

"Yeah, right." Drew muttered. "It looked like alot
more than that."

"Well, did you ask Sean about it, buddy?" Justin asked
him.

Drew shook his head.

"Well then, that means that you don't really know for
sure what is going on there." Jeff told him. "And you
never will if you don't talk about it with Sean."

Drew shrugged. "I don't know." He said.

"Come on, Drew." Danny said, putting his arm around
him. "Don't be so stubborn. If you keep this to
yourself and not talk to Sean about it then you'll end
up regretting it later."

Drew listened to what Danny was saying and realized
that he did have a point.

"But what if there is something more between Sean and
Ben?" He asked. "What if I do end up getting hurt
again?"

"Then, that's a risk, you're going to have to take."
Justin told him. "Sean won't lie to you. And if there
is something more between Ben and Sean, then you
simply pick up the pieces and move on."

Drew thought over everything that his friends were
telling him. He really did love Sean and he did want
things to be good with them again. But he was still
afraid of being hurt again. After all, it had nearly
killed him when he'd lost Sean to Nick all those years
ago, when Sean had to decide which man he loved more.

Drew was then broken out of his thoughts by his cell
phone ringing. He grabbed it out of his pocket and
proceeded to answer it.

"Hello?"

There was no reply. But Drew could hear someone
breathing on the other end of the line.

"Hello? is anyone there?" He asked again.

There was a pause.


"Drew, it's me."


To Be Continued.......?

Well, that's it for this chapter. Stay tuned for
Chapther 58 coming soon.

What happens next? Oh, if you only knew!"


slpwriter@yahoo.com