Date: Wed, 6 Dec 2000 16:53:43 +0000 (GMT) From: Adam Subject: My Love, Always Authors notes: Hey guys, this is just a test story to see the general reaction to this kind of story. The disease mentioned is not based on any real disease to my knowledge. Disclaimer: This story is not meant to claim any of the sexualities of any of the members of NSYNC, i do not know there preferances and this is just a FICTIONAL story. Any feedback please mail, adam_brittboy@yahoo.co.uk My Love, Always "It's no use. He's gone." The Doctor spoke in defeat. Lance Bass, He'd been fighting the disease that had infected him for just over a month. Singer in Nsync, loved by thousands, friends to many, and lover to Justin Timberlake had died. A month in which Lance would be taken away from his friends, and family and from everyone's hearts. Lance first discovered that he was ill after one of their shows. He was last to shower this time, so as the other guys were changing and heading for the bus, they didn't notice that Lance's ribs were a lot more visible recently, and that despite his tan, he was getting considerably paler. Luckily, his nights with his boyfriend Justin lately were few and far between, thanks to the jam-packed schedule the management had set up. When they got back to the hotel it was dark and Justin was too tired to notice his lovers changes. Even the mornings were not a problem for Lance as he was always up, showered and changed before his sweet, prince-charming awoke. (A few weeks later) Lance was not doing good. He still tried to hide it from the guys, and for the most the guys, been too-tired didn't notice much except Lance's paler complexion, which Lance covered up saying the `lack-of-sleep' over the past few weeks were to blame. However Justin was not so easily convinced. Spending time with his lover, Justin knew Lance was hiding something. They hadn't had sex in a week, and then it was just sex. No fun or feelings were in it, except the tears Justin saw falling down Lance's face in a steady stream. (A week earlier, Justin and Lance's room) " Oh Lance." Justin moaned, more for his own benefit than Lance's. There was no feeling here, no passion. They moved together, almost routinely for several more minutes, Justin wanting to go faster, but holding a steady pace. He struggled to hide his gasp when he saw tears on Lance's face. These were not tears of happiness, tears or pleasure, this was...pain? He could see Lance's face through the dim moonlight shining through the window. He could see what Lance was feeling, and Lance looked back, unable to hide from the one person who was causing these tears most of all. The pain Justin saw was not merely physical, but mental as well. Lance's thoughts were consumed with memories of his life. How the band had got together. How hard they worked to get where they were, and how his life with Justin had began, and now, thanks to his weak body he would cause the end of Nsync. He looked into Justin's eyes at one point, and knew Justin could see him through the darkness of the room. His dream, his Justin he would miss most of all, and was dying again inside at what would happen to his sweet love once he was gone. (Back to Lance's Shower) "Lance honey...you coming?" Justin's voice broke through Lance's daydream, and gave him cause to smile. "Be right there, Just." Lance yelled back as calmly as he could whilst feeling the bile and blood rise in his throat. //Oh no!// Lance thought. //Not while Justin's here. Please don't let him see this// He begged to no one. But his pleas did nothing as he dived for the toilet and coughed up blood. He did this for a few minutes, thankful Justin had not come in or heard what was happening. //Probably gone back to the bus// Lance thought in relief. Quickly changing Lance exited the bathroom and into the dressing room where he saw Justin at the door listening to two girls screaming and shouting at seeing his boy-friend. That was the last time Lance stood, or saw his fans. Lance collapsed moments after the door Justin was stood in closed, the loss of blood and the vicious disease taking every ounce of his remaining, strength. "Oh Lance, baby. Don't do this. Wake up, please wake up!" Justin begged, not knowing what to do, he reached for Lance's mobile still on the side, and with shakey hands phoned for an ambulance and then for JC to come back. The guys were all gathered around Lance and Justin after only a few seconds, all had tears in their eyes. The ambulance took Lance away around ten minutes later, managing to get a weak pulse and shallow breathing. Justin was beside himself with worry. Only a week before Lance's collapse JC had been calming Justin down about Lance's loose emotions during their love making. JC explained to him, sometimes when under extreme stress emotional outbursts such as crying or shouting, happen. Justin let his immediate worries go, trusting JC, but still kept an eye on Lance, watching his beautiful lover been taken away a piece at a time. (The Hospital-several days later) It was a few days after Lance's rush to the hospital, and the rest of the guys were asleep in the waiting room, leaving only Justin with him. Lance awoke to a cold, white ceiling. Taking a few moments to focus himself he realised where he was, and remembered what happened. Leaning up slightly Lance saw curly hair facing him. After shuffling slightly the curly hair moved and was replaced by a loving face, and not just any face. "JUSTIN!" Lance, wanted to shout, but his sore, dry throat only permitted a slight croak. Justin's face beamed upon seeing his love awake at last, and then tears fell when he remembered what the doctor had told him. --Justin/Doctor Conversation-- "And, I'm afraid Mr Timberlake, that Mr Bass has a very serious disease that is untreatable at this late stage." Upon seeing the guilt building up on the sweet, young mans face the Doctor rushed to continue. "However, finding this disease any earlier would have been very difficult to treat in any way at all. A full recovery would have never being possible." "T-Thank you, D-D-Doctor." Justin stuttered upon just hearing the death sentence of his boyfriend. "I'm terribly sorry, Mr Timberlake. If there's anything I can do..." "Give me my boyfriend back!" Justin screamed to an unseen force, cutting the Doctor off before he turned and headed back for Lance's room. --End of Justin/Doctor Conversation-- "This is it, isn't it?" Lance spoke, not asking but stating what he knew from Justin's face. They could read each other so well, that sometimes no speaking was necessary. "Don't say that! You can still make it!" Justin yelled, crying. "Justin, honey." Lance began, stretching his arm out and gently stroking his sweet boyfriends face. "Sit down, I have some things I want to tell you." Lance was beginning to cough, giving evidence his time remaining was shorter than he thought. It hurt to talk, it hurt so bad, but Lance only had to look at Justin's heartbreaking face to see that he needed to say these things to ease the pain, even if only slightly, he needed to do it. "You know I love you, right?" It was an obvious, yes, answer, but Lance waited to Justin's nod, trying to get him to focus. "My life Justin, my life has been the most love-filled life anyone could ever hope for, and you Justin...oh my sweet Justin are to thank for that." Lance paused to take a breath, feeling the pain slowly going away, telling Lance to hurry. "You've given me your body, heart and soul, and you gave it with total trust. I will never forget that Justin. Not now, nor when I'm watching over you as you start again." "No Lance!" Justin argued, though his voice was empty and void of any strength. "Shuuuuuush, Justy. You're gonna move on, and the guys will be their for you." Hurrying now, feeling his body growing lighter, the weight being lifted. He gathered all his remaining strength, and pulled Justin's head down for one last kiss. Soft, moist lips met. Both men opened their mouths together, knowing what each liked, and how they responded. Justin's tongue swam down into Lance's ever-sweet depths and he tasted everything. Needing to hold onto a piece of what they had together, a piece of Lance. He felt the kiss slowly, indicating an end, and Justin took one final touch of their tongues before there mouths parted. Lance had a blissful smile on his face from the kiss. His green, bloodshot eyes looked up into the glorious face of his Justin and they shared a moment of understanding. "I'll miss you, sweet Angel." Lance said, just louder than a whisper. With that, Lance's green pools of light and love took in what they could of Justin before finally closing. The understanding which had been there with Justin only seconds earlier was gone, replaced with a desperate need to have Lance with him once more. "Poofu, come on. Wake up." Justin sat by Lance's bed, gently shaking his lover. //Lance was always the one awake first. Always the one to wake him up, must be really tired.// Justin thought. "Justin" JC spoke, moving towards his best friend. He, like Joey, Chris and Lance's parent's who had not heard of Lance's condition until earlier that day, due to a trip in the Safari had missed their son's last hours. "JC, Lance won't wake up, tell him!" Justin said, speaking as a child would about a lost pet. "Justin!" JC repeated, with more force this time. "Lance is dead!" He shouted, attempting to snap Justin out of it. "No, he's..." Justin never finished as he crushed himself into JC's chest, the tears pouring down his face. Whilst the other's In the room quietly wept for the loss, Justin pulled back from JC and over to where Lance was. He leaned in, pressed his lips against Lance's, this time was the final time. Lance's sweet lips were no longer sweet, nor moist. They were cool, dry and bitter. What Lance had inside of him was gone, taken away by an incurable disease. But beloved Justin was not gone though. Justin knew Lance would not lie to him. Lance was up there now, looking down on him, trusting him to do what he asked. He would not let Lance down. He vowed there and then he would honour Lance's final request. "Goodbye my love" Justin whispered so no one else could hear. "You'll always be here." Justin placed his hand on his heart before moving away. Tearing his eyes from his gentle love's paling face. It was time to move on.