Copyright to this story remain strictly that of the author.
No other publication or use of this story is allowed without the consent of the
author. This story contains female to male, female to female, male to male and
several combinations of each both implied and explicit. If this offends you,
please do not continue. All characters and implied situations are strictly
those of the author and are not based on any real-life events or characters. If
you are under 18 years of age, please exit this story now.
I welcome all feedback/responses, all that I ask is that you be
respectful and provide enough information so that I know what you referring to. If
the feedback is punctuation or grammar, please save your time as I'm not going
to respond. Please let me know what you think at almcd36@hotmail.com and
don't forget to donate to Nifty at https://donate.nifty.org/.
Finding
love after incredible loss – Chapter 10
The two hunks
stared into each other's eyes – AJ was tense as he was unsure where they were
going, Scott was tense as he did not want to hold this man back.
Scott tried to
crawl out of AJ's lap, but AJ held tight – `we can talk right here.'
AJ asked Scott
again – `what are your thoughts, talk to me?' Scott told AJ he was scared, he
knew that AJ needed to go to medical school, but he was unsure whether he
should go with him. He was concerned about leaving his dad alone. Scott told AJ
how he had finished his senior year at WSU and was heading to law school when
his mom died of an aneurysm. He would not leave his dad alone, so he took a job
on the Pullman police force and stayed in Pullman. His dad has tried to get him
to return to school, but Scott has been reluctant because he is worried about
his father being alone. Scott rambled on for about 15 minutes and AJ got more
annoyed by each tick of the clock, you need to go to med
school, I need to stay, god I want you to stay, we should be together, I
won't leave for you...
AJ had enough – he
asked Scott to stand up. AJ stood and pulled his sweats up, he walked to the
door and opened it. He turned to Scott with tears in his eyes and said to him –
`I think you should leave before I say something I can't take back.' Scott
stood there; you could have knocked him over with a feather as he did not know
where this was coming from. He was convinced he had just told AJ he loved him
and would follow him to the ends of the earth. AJ growled – `leave now.' Scott
fastened his pants and walked out the door. AJ closed and locked the door
behind him, turned out the lights on the porch and inside the first floor of
the house as he grabbed a blanket and snuggled up with his boys on the love
sacs in the playroom. How could he have been so stupid to pour his heart out
and ask a man to be his husband. Scott gave him a running list of reasons not
to be together and in the end did not care enough about him to try.
AJ woke as the sun
was coming in the windows. He rose and went to the kitchen to make breakfast
for his boys, he would have to suck it up and move on he was their dad first
and foremost, they needed him. Boys changed and at the table with their milk,
pancakes and bananas. Joan coming through the door to take the boys to daycare.
Coffee in hand AJ made ready for the day – his first appointment was with his
advisor to talk through the packets and choose a school – he had decided he
would close his heart to everyone but his boys and carry on. He could not go
through another loss; first Syd and now Scott. He knew his heart could not take
it again. He kissed his boys telling them to have a good day. As he passed
Joan, he thanked her for everything she does for he and the boys and kissed her
on the cheek as he went upstairs.
He turned the
shower on, got it warmed up and stepped under the spray. He let the tension go
and cried over this latest loss. His shower was a long one, but when he stepped
out to dry off, he had put his heart in a steel box and was ready to do his
best for his boys. He got ready, put the medical school information in his bag
and headed for his advisor's office. His secretary, Sophie, greeted him with a
hug and asked if AJ would like a coffee, he said he would and thanked her. When
she handed him the coffee, she noticed his gorgeous blue eyes were not dancing
as they normally did, they were still beautiful were not filled with the life
and hope she had seen in August. They were like they were when he lost Sydney –
hard blue marble. Sophie knew there was something different when AJ took the
cup from her and asked her to call him Aaron from now on.
Her phone buzzed,
she answered and stated – `yes he's here.' She said – `Aaron right this way.'
She opened the door, announcing Aaron to Dean Simmons. Dean Simmons tilted his
head and Sophie slightly shrugged her shoulders. Dean Simmons came around the
desk, extending his had stated – `AJ, its great to see you. This has to be about your acceptance to medical school. Come on
in and we can discuss the options.' AJ asked Dean Simmons to call him Aaron,
now that he was heading to medical school, he should be a little more grown up.
The Dean raised an eyebrow to Sophie as she closed the door.
Aaron and Dean
Simmons sat at a conference table in the corner of the office. Aaron took the 5
envelopes out of his bag and placed them on the table. He only had one question
– `why are they all stating he starts in January?' The Dean chuckled and stated
– `I spent time with Professor McDonald. Talked with her about the fact that
everyone else gave you a makeup test after the loss of Sydney. She was the only
one. In the end, Professor McDonald broke down and said she was wrong and that
her decision to dig in was since she had gotten close to Sydney as a student
and her start advisee. She was devastated and could not bring herself to see the
pain in your eyes and heart. In the end, she gave you an A in the course and
stated, you were her best student and had never dropped a point in her class.
Even without the points from the final you had the second highest point total
in the class.
Once you complete
your finals in mid-December you will be a graduate of the university. I talked
with each of the programs and suggested they bring you in to the program in
January so that you could close this chapter in your life and have a chance to
heal away from everything that is so haunting. Aaron asked the Dean which
program he thought would be best given his desire to be a surgeon. The Dean
started into his feedback on the programs and at the end of his analysis – he
thought the most well-rounded Medical Program was UC – San Francisco as they
ranked the best in Surgery, Research and GP. That said the prestige of Harvard
as an institution could not be beat. Aaron thanked him for that, said he would
consider the input, but thought he was leaning toward Duke. Even though their
GP program was only top 50, their Surgery and Research were both top three and
the location was something he needed right now – far away and in a warmer
climate. With distance and climate in the mix, Dean Simmons could not argue
against Duke. It is a great school and he was certain that AJ, sorry Aaron
would excel at. Dean Simmons did state he had been in contact with the UW
program who would have a spot for Aaron, since it was close to family did Aaron
want to consider that program. Aaron sighed and said he needed a fresh start
and time to build a new life.
After 90 minutes of
back and forth and a call to the Dean of the School of Medicine at Duke, Pascal
Goldschmidt, Aaron had accepted the start of his new life in Durham, North
Carolina. The Dean indicated that his office would secure a residence near the
school for Aaron and his two boys. Aaron would be able to move in the last week
of December and classes would begin after the New Year.
Aaron called his
parents and let them know he had selected Duke and would begin his drive east
on the 27th of December as classes would begin the 4th of
January. He was excited to start his next chapter. His mom asked if Scott was
going with him and Aaron said no, I believe that is over. Before he hung up, he
said `mom I'm sorry for the drama. I'm focusing on my future and my boys; the
rest does not matter. I will see you next week for Thanksgiving. I love you
both.' He hung up and headed to class.
Aaron wasn't looking
back, he would be a great surgeon and would make sure his boys were taken care
of, loved and knew who their mother was. As he completed the day, he hit the
gym and worked himself hard. He showered, dressed and headed to grab the boys
at daycare. When he walked in Caleb and Conor ran over to him and latched on to
his legs. Aaron knew at that point, he was going to be fine, alone with his
boys but he would make it. He touched the wedding rings that were back around
his neck, a tear rolled down his cheek and he said quietly – `Syd, you were my
one and only. I know that now and will be ok. I have your memory and the boys,
thank you for the most precious gift.'
Aaron grabbed the
boys and went home. They settled back into their routine, spent Thanksgiving
with the family, including Syd's parents at his mom and dad's house. Aaron made
it clear he was unwilling to discuss Scott, apologized for the drama and said –
it was a blip. They had a brilliant time and ate more than they should, loved
each other like they should and really gave thanks for what and who they had in
their lives. Charlene and Evelyn stated they would come to Pullman at the end
of next week to pack the house, watch the boys and generally take care of Aaron
so he could finish his exams and focus on school.
The moms arrived
together and took over the household. Aaron focused on his 3 exams and his
workouts, everything else was noise and thus not something to focus on. Chase
and Brett tried to get AJ to spend time with them but were rebuffed at every
turn. Steve and Brent tried to get Scott to open up,
but he was sullen and would not engage either. The 4 fixtures in AJs life were
at a loss and had no idea what the hell happened. They had been kicked out that
Sunday as Scott and AJ kissed with their cocks hard and proud, then the next
thing they knew Scott did not exist for Aaron (what they hell was up with that
change) and AJ did not exist for Scott.
While Aaron was
taking his last final – his lab work – 6 hours of testing, Chase, Brent, Brett
and Steve stopped by AJs house (they had finally refused to call him Aaron and
were ready to tie him down and pull the stick out of his ass) to talk to mom.
Evelyn hugged her boys and asked what they were up to. Chase stated – we are
frustrated with AJ and don't understand what crawled up his ass and why he was
acting like a robot. Evelyn gave Chase what for as she did not appreciate his
language but agreed there was something going on with AJ. Charlene joined the
conversation and agreed with Evelyn and the boys. She knew it had something to
do with Scott, but also knew that they had been rebuffed and told to leave it
alone. Brett related the evening that they all had last been together in the
house (leaving out the sexual/naked things), how things were lovey dovey romantic on Sunday when they were kicked out of the
house and how robotic AJ was the next day. Chase, choking back tears said –
`this is worse than when he lost Syd, at least then he would talk about it, but
now all you get is `I love you, but butt out''. Mom, I'm worried that we lost
his heart – he has thrown himself into 3 things – school, workouts and his
boys. All important, but he has totally shut his heart off, you can see it in
his eyes. They have always had life, energy and love in them. Now they are just
gorgeous blue pools but don't have any sparkle in them. What can we do to help?
Anyone of us would through ourselves in front of a bus to help him, but he has
shut us out. We have always been more than fraternity brothers and now I don't feel
like we are anything to him and that is killing us.
With that – the
door opened behind them and Aaron walked in singing and stopped in his tracks
when he noticed the group gathered. Caleb and Conor ran to their daddy, with
both boys yelling pick me up, pick me up. Aaron dropped his bag and scooped up
his kiddos, kissing them and blowing on their bellies as he walked into the
room of sullen adults. Aaron got on the floor with the boys and played with
them, while the adults just watched him. After 10 minutes of silence from the
adults, Aaron took the boys in the other room, put a movie on and pulled the
doors partway closed. He turned on his heels and addressed the group – `what
they hell is wrong with you six?' No one spoke, they all just stared at him. The
only noise to be heard were the fits of laughter coming from the playroom.
Aaron looked at the gathered group and stated in no uncertain terms – `you all
need to do one of two things – 1 support me in my choices or 2 get out. You
choose. I'm going to go change, order some pizza and finish packing as the
movers are here the day after tomorrow and I head home after they are finished.
Aaron headed
upstairs to change and came back downstairs in cutoff sweatpants and a WSU
t-shirt. He went to the refrigerator grabbed a beer, popped the top and took a
long pull off the bottle. Turning to the group said – `1 or 2?' There was a
mumbling from the living room – `1', his mom stood and said to her son – `AJ
and no it is not Aaron to me and never will be again. Syd called you AJ from
the time you knew her and she convinced me that was what I should call you too.
If you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself. You
have had your piece and I will have mine now. Boys, shut it. AJ, none of us
know what is going on with you other than you are not yourself' AJ started to
interrupt and his mom silenced him again `I said – it is my turn you will shut
your mouth and listen to me. I told you the answer to your question is a
resounding `1'. That does not mean that I am going to keep my mouth shut when
you have put your head so far up your ass that you can see day light. Chase,
Brett as I said before `shut it'. AJ dear, every person in this room LOVES you,
don't roll your eyes at me or I'm going to put my foot up your ass to join your
head. We know something happened with Scott.'
At that point
Evelyn marched into the kitchen, grabbed AJ by the ear and sat his ass on one
of the stools at the kitchen bar. `I did not raise you to be disrespectful and
you will NOT start now. Evelyn continued – you took us all by surprise when you
introduced Scott as your forever love, now you won't even discuss him,
something happened. We all see that and will support your decision to move on.
That said, you WILL NOT shut us out. We love you and are here for you. So as
your mom and the person in this world who has loved you the longest, please
pull your head out of your ass and lean on us and let us be part of YOUR future
– you should not try to move forward on your own, you have too many people who
love you.
AJ sat there
listening to his mom – when she was done, he kissed her on the cheek and
relented. He apologized to the group, but did state Scott is out of bounds, but
he would do his best to pull his head out of his ass. Once he had apologized,
he looked at his mom and said cheekily – I would truly appreciate you and
everyone else to watch their language around my boys, they are not used to
hearing such words. Evelyn smacked him on the back of the head. Pizzas here –
did you order enough for your older boys? AJ winked and said – what do you
think.