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Finding love after incredible loss – Chapter 11

 

Pizzas here – did you order enough for your older boys? AJ winked and said – what do you think.

 

AJ opened the door and took the pizza and sodas from the delivery driver. There were 8 large pizzas, 2 large salads and 2 large breadsticks. Everyone dug in and tried to put the situation behind them, AJ was at least talking to them about the future. They all were concerned that he was more closed off than after Syd had been killed, but at least he was talking to them. As they ate pizza, AJ sorted through the mail. There were two large envelopes in the mix, AJ opened the first on and read through the settlement agreement from the DEA. He told his moms that the DEA had settled for millions of dollars, more money than he could ever spend. Evelyn and Charlene looked at each other with a questioning look on their faces. Evelyn asked to see the letter and AJ handed it to her as he opened the next envelope. Evelyn and Charlene choked on their pizza as they said in unison, son that is billion not million. AJ did not respond. They all looked up at him, he had tears flowing from his eyes as he was reading the letter that was on top of several legal documents.

 

Everyone sat and waited for AJ to finish reading the letter and let them know what was going on. Once he looked up, he walked around the bar and hugged his boys, they both kissed him with pizza sauce on their face. They said love dada. AJ turned to the adults and said – this is nuts. The letter is also from the attorney. Hold it did you say billion not million, holy fuck. Stunned into silence AJ sat there with his mouth open. Evelyn through a breadstick at this head and asked – what did the other letter state? AJ shook his head and said – evidently Syd had purchased property in Hunts Point and was renovating the home so that we would have a place to move in to when we were done with school. The envelope contains the deed and documents from the county and contractor stating everything is done, the furnishings have been placed and everything is ready for us to move in. The contractor had his decorator decorate for Christmas. He knew Sydney had passed and this was his gift to me and the boys. Instructions on getting access are included as well.

 

There is also a handwritten note from Sydney – it states `my love if you are reading this instead of hearing this from me something horribly wrong has happened. Know that I love you with all my heart, this house was my gift to you as the love of my life, the father of my children and the man that I committed until death us do part. By now you know that My grandmother set me up with more money than we could logically spend in a lifetime, I have set up trust funds for the boys as you know by now, but this was to be my special gift for my hot, hung, stunningly beautiful (inside and out), studly, gorgeous, loving, charismatic, did I mention HOT and HUNG man. I don't know what twist of fate has separated us, but know you had my heart at hello. You had my mind the first time you challenged Professor McDaniel and proved him wrong, you had my body with our first kiss and you had my eternal love when those sparkling, mischievous cerulean blue eyes looked into my soul. Please my love – don't close your heart, you are a one in a million and God as my witness you are the most magical lover – you really are the most loving, caring and giving soul I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. Finally, my love – God created your body and soul to provide pleasure to others. I don't have extensive experience with other men, some but I wasn't a slut as you know. What I understand from my girlfriends is that you are the ideal partner – you care deeply about people and you devote yourself to making them happy and when you make love you give more than you take, you ensure they climax multiple times which I guess is not the norm for most men. My love, please don't let whatever tragedy close your heart, your mind or your soul. You are my forever love and I want you to enjoy life and let someone else enjoy that HOT body, I know I did. Your love, Sydney. P.S. – I really hope you didn't read this out loud to anyone, especially our moms as they might have a heart attack. If you did – mom E you raised a man you can truly be proud of, he is truly as special as I said in this letter.'

 

AJ folded the letter and wiped his eyes. He looked around the room and realized he had been reading aloud and immediately turned the deepest shade of red. Chase crossed the room and hugged his big with every ounce of strength and whispered in his ear – `from what I know of you, EVERYTHING in that letter is true and you do have a heart of gold, I love you too you hot, hung stud.' Chase kissed him on the mouth, with tongue. Hugged him again and asked if they could get together one last time before AJ flies to North Carolina with the boys at the end of the month.' AJ said come on over to the new house just before Christmas and we can all hang out before we leave. And I love you too. Brett, Brent and Steve hugged AJ and they all headed back to the house and said they would stop by on Friday with bagels before they headed home.

 

Charlene and Evelyn wiped their eyes and hugged their boy. They said that some of that letter probably should have stayed between Syd and you, but in the end AJ she was right – you are one in a million and you can't hide from love. Please don't close yourself off and make sure you give yourself the chance to be happy. AJ said he would try and asked if everyone would come to the new house for Christmas and celebrate with, he and the boys. The moms agreed they would be there for the holidays and take he and the boys to the airport. AJ said that he was driving and the moms both said you are not driving those boys across the country. Fly and buy a car in North Carolina – you could afford it before the government settlement, now you could buy your own plane, please don't drive.

 

The movers came and left, AJ loaded his boys in his Tahoe and they headed out for their next chapter.

 

As they were driving out of Pullman, a police car pulled AJ over. AJ was pissed, he knew he had done nothing wrong and was loaded for bear. He rolled his window down as the officer approached the vehicle. Jonathan leaned in and said – I don't know what happened, but Scott loves you and I believe you love him too. Jonathan asked AJ to meet him around the corner for a coffee so they could talk. AJ pulled into the parking lot, got the boys out of their seats and headed into McDonalds for a cup of coffee and hot chocolate for the boys.

 

Jonathan had the coffee and hot chocolate order so AJ went to a table off in the corner for as much privacy as could be found. Jonathan brought the drinks to the table, Conor and Caleb hugged Jonathan and kissed him on the cheek. The boys had their hot chocolate, Jonathan had a tear rolling down his cheek that he wiped away. He took a dep breath and said – `AJ, what they hell happened? You two seemed to be so in love. I know Scott is miserable, lost and doesn't know what to do he is going through the motions. I know he has dialed your number a thousand times, but always stops before he presses the call button. I'm worried he's going to get hurt on the job, tell me what happened.'

 

Jonathan, its Aaron please. AJ doesn't exist any longer. The last night we were together, I asked Scott to be my husband, my life partner and my future. I knew it was fast, but when I met Syd we dated for 5 days before we slept together and less than 6 months before we were married, granted I got her pregnant. Obviously, I can't nor can Scott get pregnant, but I was SURE he was my future. I had never had any desire to be with a man sexually it never crossed my mind or my heart. I know that changed the night Syd died – Scott came to my door and shattered my world that night, but the only reason I didn't lose my mind is this strong man with a huge heart helped me through and held me together. I didn't know it at the time but looking back his touch captured my being that night. Jonathan interrupted, then what the fuck man – I know he loves you and you just said you love him.

 

Jonathan – language please. My boys are right here. Jonathan apologized. Jonathan, you are trying to convince me that Scott loves me, but that night he told me he would not come with me to medical school. He talked in circles for a long time and at the end he stated out loud, I can't leave here for you. My heart broke as I had just asked him to be mine forever and he stated in no uncertain terms, `I can't leave here for you'. I have been talked to, talked at and told I can't shut myself off from love but I have to in order to survive and make a life for my boys. I gave my heart to your son and he told me he didn't want it. If he is walking around, distressed, unsure of what to do next, then he needs to nut up, look in the mirror and move the f' on. He ripped my heart from my chest and stomped on it that night. I don't have the energy, the tears or the inclination to go through it again. I have my boys; I have my future and I will be ok. I won't soar with the eagles, but that's ok I had that with Syd and I had thought I would have that with Scott. All of that is locked in my soul and I will survive and dedicate my future to these precious bundles of unconditional love.

 

Aaron reached across the table and wiped Jonathan's eyes and stated, I have no more tears. I hoped you would be my dad, but hope is not a guarantee, so Jonathan thank you for the coffee and I do wish you and Scott all the best, I truly do.

 

Aaron rose, grabbed his boys and walked out of the restaurant leaving Jonathan confused and utterly heartbroken as he knew Aaron would be fine, but he knew that his light had gone out – his eyes were lifeless pools of dark blue marble.