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Finding
love after incredible loss – Chapter 14
The six of them
loaded up and headed into battle. AJ was expecting Charlene and Elliott for
brunch.
Charlene pushed the
button on the garage door opener that she had kept and the gang all filed in. Elliott
leading the way and Scott at the end of the train. Caleb and Conor ran down the
hall to greet their grandparents and squealed with delight when they saw not
only gigi/gpa, but also mimi/papa. AJ called from the kitchen and Elliott said
they were coming. Caleb was squirming to get down as he had seen Scott and he wanted
him now. Caleb yelled at gigi, I want Scott. You could have heard a pin drop,
AJ came around the corner with fire in his eyes –
Evelyn stood
between AJ and the rest of the group and thumped him in the chest with her
finger – you WILL calm down this instance and we are going to have a civilized
conversation. Charlene had put Caleb down and he scrambled for Scott – he was
dancing at Scott's feet getting more and more animated – Uppey, Uppey Scott,
pwease Scott uppey. Scott scooped up the little guy and they hugged each other
tightly. Conor was now insisting he needed uppey, uppey – no fair, no fair. Scott
picked Conor up too, the boys squeezed his neck tightly giving him kisses and
saying we missed you.
AJ had spun on his
heals and was out on the patio, fuming. He didn't feel the cold all he felt was
betrayed. How could they do this to him? Evelyn had followed him outside and
pulled his face down so their foreheads were touching. AJ did not try to pull
away, he didn't have the energy any longer – he just sobbed, why are you doing
this? His mama said – because I love you and want you to be happy. You my dear
boy need to realize Scott loves you and you can't shut him out because he said
the wrong thing. You have always worn your heart on your sleeve and trusted
people to be just like you – honest, open, loving, generous, kind and there for
everyone. Scott IS that mirror, listen to him with your heart and not your head
– he knows he said the wrong thing and hurt you, give him a chance because he
is hurting too.
Scott had walked up
behind AJ and slid his arms around his waist, pulling him tightly against his
body. AJ stiffened and went to pull away and his mama said again – just listen
with that big, beautiful heart of yours, it will be alright if you do. Evelyn
retreated to the house and Scott pulled the blanket he had brought out with him
tighter around the two of them. AJ did not say anything and remained rigid, but
did not pull away.
Scott with tears
streaming down his face took a deep breath and started to speak – he started
with; I'm so, so, so sorry about what I said and what I didn't say to you when
you asked me to be your husband. My dad got me to walk through that night and
recount word for word what we talked about, what I specifically said and what I
thought I had said. What I realized is that because I was truly overwhelmed and
SO FUCKING in love with you my mind moved faster than my mouth did – My initial
response never came out of my mouth. AJ went to pull away as he was getting
frustrated all over again, he was so much more direct than other people and struggled
with people that could not get to the point.
Scott held tight
and tried to take mama's advice – keep it simple and to the point. AJ's
frustrations started to boil over. Scott took another deep breath and
apologized for being all over the place, he was not used to being succinct and
to the point in his personal life. He asked AJ to look at him so he could see
his eyes as he explained what happened, which AJ did and asked him to stop the
verbal dancing and say what it is he is here to say.
One last deep
breath – Scott looked into those cold dark blue marble eyes and knew their future
was at stake – `I'm sorry, you know by now I get tongue tied and drivel on at
times, that only happens around you. What I meant to say when you asked me to
be your husband was – ABSOLUTELY, unequivocally YES. I need you with me, you
complete me, you make me make sense and without you I am lost. Scott had been
watching AJs eyes and they were the first indication that he might have broken
through, those cold marble like eyes were beginning to dance, sparkle and smolder
a bit. Scott's last words on the subject were – I'm sorry for getting tongue
tied and letting the jumble of words in my head flow out of my mouth, please
forgive me.
AJ crashed his
mouth against Scott's, driving his tongue into his forever loves mouth, he pulled
the two of them together tightly. Scott dropped the blanket and returned the
kiss with as much passion as he could, he was going to make damn sure he did
not hurt this wonderful soul again. Mama had said it best – AJ is a man's man,
but he is a mama's boy with all the gooey stuff on his sleeve for all to see if
they just open their eyes. Scott vowed to himself that he would never ignore
the gooey wonderfulness that is Aaron Jonathan `AJ' O'Brien again. As they
broke the kiss and came up for air, Scott asked him if he could call him AJ again.
AJ grabbed Scott's balls at that point and squeezed – pleading with his eyes as
he said – `yes as long as you don't make me go through that hell again – my heart
would be lost forever.' Scott committed to loving him but did make sure that AJ
knew his heart was too big and beautiful to ever be shut completely off.
AJ and Scott heard
banging on the patio door – Conor and Caleb had been pounding on it for some
time now. They were getting frustrated; mama finally opened the door and both
boys ran out to their dad asking if it was ok for Scott to stay for bwunch. AJ squatted
down, hugged his boys and said, `most definitely.' The boys asked why Scott and
daddy were crying – they both said cause we are happy. The boys giggled and
that's silly.
As the new family
headed into the house, AJ leaned into Scott and asked if he was also wearing
AJs underwear? Scott blushed and admitted that he had on AJs cologne, deodorant,
underwear, socks, t-shirt, sweatshirt and sweatpants. If he was being completely
honest, he even used AJs toothbrush this morning, after he slept in his bed. When
they visited his mom and dad's in the future, AJ would have to find the sock he
came in when he beat off in his bed. Scott kissed him on the cheek and they
went inside to eat. AJ hugged Jonathan (JR), his dad and his in-laws.
While the boys had
been talking on the patio Charlene had finished the brunch prep and put the
food on the table. The quiches AJ had made were sitting on hot pads waiting to
be served. Everyone passed the massive spread around the table. After grace was
said – AJ thanked everyone for putting up with him for the last couple of
months. Scott then started to explain what happened and why, generally
blathering on when AJ squeezed his hand and said – `get to the point, my dear.'
Everyone laughed, Scott turned pink and the boys giggled.
After cleaning up
the brunch dishes, AJ, Caleb and Conor gave a tour of the new house. There were
views from almost every room out over Lake Washington. Caleb and Conor got
really excited when they showed everyone their rooms. They did make it clear
that for now they would stay together, but that they each did have their own. When
they got to AJs room the boys were jumping around telling mimi, gigi, gpa, papa
and JR – this is daddy and Scotts room. We slept with daddy last night because Scott
wasn't here. Turning to Scott they asked – where were you, we missed you lot's.
AJ started to answer, but Scott he had this one – he knelt in front of the boys
and said, I made a big mess of things. I hurt your daddy and I'm sorry about
that, do you think you can forgive me? The boys looked at their dad and said `yes
silly' we all love you. Mama stated loudly – like father like sons; wearing
their heart out there for all to see.
AJ pouted a bit as
he realized what his mom and said to Scott. He asked – so mom did you tell
Scott that your baby was mad and took his toys home and was refusing to play
with the other kids? Evelyn said – I told him the truth; you were hurt and the way
you deal with that is to circle your wagons and keep everyone one on the
outside except for these two handsome kiddos. It is who you are and those who
love you know it, adore it and would not change it for the world, because we
know where we always stand with you. You are honest, direct, kind, loving,
generous and loyal to a fault. That is until someone wrongs you then you are,
cold, ruthless, vindictive and downright cutthroat.
My only request from
you both is this – AJ, no matter what Scott does you must know he loves you and
would die for you so please don't forget that. Scott my other boy – please get
to the damn point; you have a heart of gold, but you tend to talk WAY too much.
Finally, I'm too old to go through this again – so love each other, be direct
and kind. AJ – do you have some wine for this old gal?
As everyone exited
the bedroom and returned to the family room, AJ whispered into Scott's ear `that
ass is mine tonight' as he squeezed Scott's left cheek.