You know all the usual stuff, don't read if it's illegal or you don't like sex or sex between two males offends you. All characters are purely fictional, and any likeness is coincidence. Joshua Glynn reserves all rights to this story, the characters, and the world they live in. Please send any feedback to or visit my yahoo group at


This story is about an 18/yo boy struggling with the gifts that he possesses, and trying to find out where he fits in a modern day society.


Joshua moved to Goose Creek, South Carolina, just outside of Charleston, due to some serious girl problems. Now he has met the twins, his next door neighbors, and is feeling confused about his feelings toward them. His first day of school was great until he got into a fight with the school bully. Now he has a new girlfriend, and some really strange feelings for her twin brother. Now he has a chance to try out for the Highschool football team.




Gifted: Book One

Soul Mates




When I got home Saturday evening I was so frustrated, I went straight to my room for a fast jerk. I didn't bother with any fantasizing; I didn't need it after the events of the night. I slept like a log all night, and it was the best night's sleep I'd had all week.

Sunday was a lot of fun. Grandpa went over a few more things with me. We trained for about two hours, and when it was over we were both tired and hungry. Mom had made a wonderful meal, so we ate and then took a nap while watching the Sunday football game.

About three, Casey stopped by and asked if I wanted to go play some football to get ready for tryouts the next day. For some reason Casey seemed a little more withdrawn for some reason, like he didn't know if he really wanted to do it. There were some other kids out playing flag football on the field, so we joined in. It was actually a lot of fun. There was more strategy involved because you had to stay away from the other team, not just keep from being tackled or in this case keep from getting my flag pulled.

When we got home, instead of our usual cool down, Casey just said bye and that he would see me tomorrow. I felt kind of strange about that. I really seemed to miss just sitting and talking with him. It was almost like the Kool-Aid cool down was just an excuse for us to just talk about anything with each other. I still wanted to find out more about this guy he likes.

The next morning brought the day I had been waiting for and I couldn't wait for the afternoon tryouts. The day seemed to drag on. I had another test in AP Chemistry. The celebrity routine seemed to finally be wearing off. Carrie was very affectionate toward me for some reason. It could have been the date we had Saturday night, but I'm just guessing.

At lunch, James sat across from Casey and I. "So you guys pumped about this afternoon!"

"This afternoon? What's this afternoon?" I said acting like I didn't have a clue what he was talking about.

Casey not skipping a beat said, "Yea Josh, remember we were going to Tiffany's house to help her clean out her garden."

Poor James looked as though someone had stolen his birthday present. We started laughing. James just smiled and said, "Oh I get it. I see how it is, just wait! If you guys make it to the team, both your asses are mine!" I got an image from him of bending Casey over one of the locker room benches and having his way with him. He must have wanted Casey for a long time. I can see why James would want him though. He is the sexiest guy at... wait a minute. Damn it! Why am I...?

That afternoon, Casey and I went to the locker room for the tryouts. There were at least twenty other guys trying out for the slot there. Most of them were seniors or juniors though.

"Ok, settle down guys. For those of you who don't know, my name is James Carlson, I'm your Captain. Coach sent me in here to make sure you all get outfitted in practice uniforms. So you should all have a pair of gym shorts and a jock so get changed into them. Then, come up here to me and I'll outfit you in shoulder pads, a practice shirt, and get you each a helmet."

We did as instructed. A few of the guys did the shy thing and went to a bathroom stall. Most of us just started changing right there. There were a lot of cocks flapping all over the place. A few were beginning to stiffen. Some of the thoughts in the room were hilarious.

Oh god, I hope no one noticed... Wow! Now that's an ass... I Hope there aren't any fagots in here getting a free peep... that last one came from Alex Smith. He was one of Mark's flunkies. I didn't think he had seen me yet. What the fuck is he doing here! I guess I thought too soon.

Now, I have been in a locker room many times, changing, and I've seen a good many cocks in my time. Mine was generally among the larger category in the room. Today was no exception. I had never, really, gotten hard by looking at another guy naked before, but my God! Casey looked fantastic. He looked just like in my dream. He has that very tight, almost skater, look. You know what I mean, he looks almost too skinny, but with muscles in all the right places. His ass is two perfect globes. They looked like they might be the fleshiest part of him. He had a faded, allover tan, like he sunbathed in the nude, but now was going away. He had that washboard look to his abs, and his hairless chest was round on the sides and flat on top.

This guy was really turning me on. It was a good thing I had changed quicker than him, otherwise, everyone would have seen me thickening. The best part was his cock. It was...gorgeous. (Did I really just think it was gorgeous?) Not too long, looked about five inches semi-soft. He was cut. It had that nice fat mushroom head on it that looked a few sizes larger the rest of it. His balls hung very low, and looked the size of small eggs. His bush was well trimmed. He had no hair anywhere on his balls. (Why was I awestruck by this guy? I've seen dozens of guys naked and never once felt this way about them. What is so special about him?)

He looked up and smiled at me. I smiled back, then said, "We better get going or they are going to leave us." laughing. I was getting a bit of embarrassment from him.

God, I hope... was the only thought that crept out of his mind.

We headed over, got our gear and practice shirt. Suited up and left for the field. I could tell by his thoughts James was having way too much fun watching all the guys change. The little perv! I have got to find some time to talk to him about that.

When we got out to the field, the rest of the team was already there, in their full uniforms. That way it was very obvious who the new guys were. Coach had us and the rest of the team, do two laps around the field before we got started. I had already decided that I was going to keep my newfound strength as low as possible for most of the trial and just use it to give myself a very slight edge. I didn't want to look like Superman out there! Besides I had become very good over the last few days, Casey was an excellent teacher.

Then, he divided us into ten, two-man teams. He then had us run out to the 20 yard line while James and this other kid I didn't know, threw the ball to us. We went in a big circle. You ran out caught the ball or not, and then went to the end of the line, to start all over again. Everyone missed at least one of the balls except me, Casey and two other guys. He told five of the guys that he had seen enough to know that he didn't need them, that they were dismissed. I found out later that two of them were from the JV team.

Next, we did the same thing, but this time Coach assigned a guy to try and stop us from completing the pass. I was quite proud of my self. I only missed one pass, but it was because my blocker interfered with the pass. He tackled me, just as I reached for the ball. (I think he was getting frustrated with me.) I was learning a lot from him about what his position would be doing to catch me. Casey did well too. Out of ten, he caught seven. Only three others had done that well, but I was feeling very good about my performance. The coach told nine more guys to hit the showers.

Now he wanted to see how we shaped up in real plays. The whole team came on the field. Since there where six of us left, he sent us out in two's again. The first two to go up were the last two JV guys left, one a sophomore the other a freshman. It was then that I realized we had a sophomore, a freshman, a junior, and three seniors including me and Casey.

They played through six plays, randomly alternating between the two receivers. They each did well. Next, was Alex, he was the junior, and the other senior, named Leif that had just transferred in a few weeks ago. They both did much better then the JV guys. Finally Casey and I were up.

Casey got the first ball, which he caught, and then was promptly tackled, to the ground. I didn't really like the way the guy who was on me, was acting. He was the same guy from the last round of testing, I found out his name was Will Jefferson. I think he, still a little pissed at me, was thinking I was showing him up or something.

The next play was mine. I ran out on the left side, Will was covering me well. At the last moment I shifted to the right and ran across the field. James hit me about center of the field. I jumped up and caught it, but as I was in the air I realized that I was in a bad position. As I came down, Will slammed into my legs, sending me spinning in midair. I landed face first, on my head. "God Dammit, Jefferson! We are trying to find a new receiver, not bury another one!" yelled Coach. Coach and this another guy, I think was the team doctor, or therapist, or what ever they call him, were running up to me, to see if I was ok. Before they got within five yards, however I had already gotten up. "Hey son, you ok." The coach yelled. James had run up too.

"Yes sir! I'm ok. That was good hit, though!" I said smiling at Will as I was dusting myself off. I realized now why I had not taken any real damage in the fight against Mark. My newfound strength tightened me up on impact, so the damage was very minimal, almost like it made my skin harder. It seems to react by instinct, because I had it very low during that play and it shot to full as I was falling.

"By God, boy, you can take a Hit!" Coach said smiling at me

"Now you see why I want him, right Coach. Good hands, fast on his feet, and tough as an ox." James said beaming at me.

"Ok, back to the line people! Next play!" Coach said as he slapped me on the back.

The Doc came up to me, had me take off my helmet, and flashed a light in my eyes. He then told me I could go on back to the tryouts. The rest of tryouts went very well. Will stopped his attempts to injure me, and I caught both of the other two passes as well. The last one I pushed a little power in to my strength to boost my speed and got a break away, running for a touchdown. Will was pissed about that, but he just laughed it off and said, "I'm glad you're on our side, because you would really piss me off on the field." He continued laughing, most of the team around him joined in.

Casey did well too. He had caught all his plays. The problem was so had Leif, and I didn't know if Casey's performance would be good enough. Coach told us all to hit the showers, and he would have a decision before we left. Alex didn't look happy. There was one position for sure, maybe two, and most of the guys seemed to think I had made the best performance. I could hear them all, excited and nervous.

We all striped, and headed for the showers. I had to try not to look at Casey, but it wasn't helping much. Luckily, I didn't get fully hard, but it was enough that anyone could see how big I really was. Wow I caught from somewhere but it was too quick. By the time we had gotten soaped up, the rest of the team had come in from their discussion with the coach.

James came right up to me and Casey and I, Wow, hotter than I had ever imagined and I suddenly got an image from James of me fucking the hell out of Casey. He was grinning like the Cheshire cat. James looked like the perfect male specimen. He was not too tall. He had these stacks of muscle in all the right places. His body was practically hairless, or at least what hair he had you couldn't see. The only real visible hair on him was his long blond hair and the bush of blond just above his growing cock. If the rest of the team only knew... "Well, guys you both did very well! Casey, why didn't you come back this year?"

I couldn't make summer training. I didn't get home from summer vacation until just a few days before school started." James was getting a little excited. He was at full mast now, and although it wasn't that long it was fat. He went on to another showerhead. The rest of the team came into the shower. They all said hi to me as they passed and they all had these big smiles on their faces. I wondered if it was a good sign.

Will came up to me, and stuck out his hand. "No hard feelings Josh."

"None taken..." as I took his hand.

Will made no pretence then, as he made it obvious that he was checking me out. A couple of the other guys laughed about it, with `hey...checkout Will.' Will's thoughts were very lude. In his mind, he saw himself grab me, turn me around, and start beast fucking me right in front of everyone in the shower. He was walking around at full mast, and everyone else was just laughing about it. I'm starting to wonder, is the whole team gay? None of them seemed to have a problem with Will pointing at me like a golden retriever.

I just turned around to the water spray to finish up. I was getting a little uncomfortable, with the attention Will was giving me. Luckily my cock was deflating. Oh God! And he has a nice ass, too I got from him as he started to walk away. After the shower I went out and got dressed. Casey was right behind me. Will had been messing with Casey after I left. Casey didn't seem to like the guy either.

After everyone else had come out of the shower and was getting dressed, Coach came out and called attention. "Ok, people settle down! First off let me thank the six of you for coming out here today. Although the space on the team is limited this season, I wish I could keep every single one of you. You are all very fine athletes. I would invite those of you who didn't make it to PLEASE tryout next summer. I can think of spots for every one of you."

"So I guess you want me to let you know who I've chosen. All right, my first choice should have been self-apparent to anyone watching the tryouts today. Joshua Kingston!" the whole team roared with approval. After they calmed down, "I have also decided to fill the backup receiver position as well. So my second choice is, Casey Toma. Since he would have been on the team this year anyway I thought it best to give him back his position." They all cheered again.

"However, I do have a counter offer to make here. Joshua how would you like to play Tight End? Matt, one of our current Tight Ends has been begging me to let him be a backup Quarterback. I think you could handle it. What do you say?"

Wow! Tight End, the best of both worlds, both a rusher and a receiver. "I'll do it!" there was a loud "Hooray" from the back of the room, from Matt I think. Everyone else just laughed.

"Well then, Since this Leif's final year too, I thought it best to give him his shot as well. Leif Barcof will be our backup receiver."

The rest of the team cheered. Alex was the only one not cheering. In fact he made it clear he was not happy at all, by the way he walked out and slammed the door.

"I expect you both here tomorrow afternoon for your first team practice. This week is an away game so I expect everyone to get a good night's sleep on Thursday night!"

We all agreed and thanked Coach. Casey was very excited to be in a play spot on the team. Leif was just happy to be on the team. I was so happy for Casey and could not believe that I was not a tight-end! I couldn't wait.

There was quite a bit of celebration after the coach left, and it was official that we were on the team. Since this week's game was an away game we would leave Friday at noon and stay at a hotel Friday night. James told us that away games always meant a big party at the hotel that night. Casey and me were very excited about the idea of a big party. The coach would be there but James said he never interfered with their fun.

Dad was ecstatic that we made the team, especially the fact I'm playing tight-end. All he talked about during dinner was his son playing football. I didn't get a chance to talk to Casey today because Carrie had picked us up and as soon as they dropped me off at home, me and dad took off so I could get a haircut. I hated it but it looks good on me. I figured I could wait until tomorrow after our first practice to talk to Casey again.

That night I went to bed early because I was dead tired after the tryouts. I had another dream, but this time it was all Casey, in the locker room. We were getting ready for a shower after a game, but no one was in the locker room but us. Everything seemed normal. We undressed, and headed for the shower.

After we turned on the shower Casey turned to me with a smile, and began applying soap everywhere on my body. He was doing it as though we had done this before, several times. It felt natural, like this was a normal thing we did all the time. He reached down and began applying ample soap to my nut sac and then my hardening cock. he stopped and turned around holding his arms out to his side, inviting me in. So, I moved up behind him and pressed my body against him, my cock sliding between his ass cheeks. Slowly, I began moving around, using my body to suds him up in the back.

I reached around in front him and began soaping up his front. I thoroughly enjoyed running my hands across his chiseled flat chest and six pack. I paid close attention to his groin, messaging his raging prick in one hand, and his balls with the other. Then, he turned his head around and we locked in a kiss that was more passionate than I have ever felt in my life. He broke the kiss and bent over slightly, using the shower handles for support and smiling at me.

I knew what he wanted, so I placed my very hard, very soapy, cock at his rear entrance. He pushed back, impaling himself on me. He felt so good. It was completely different from Jessica. He was hotter, tighter, and it was a much more aggressive feel. I continued slowly thrusting in and out of him. It was the most intense dream I've ever had. We slowly rocked back and forth for a good fifteen minutes. Then I awoke to shorts being filled with my boy juice.

It was only eleven o'clock at night and I couldn't get back to sleep. I couldn't get the image of Casey's hot wet body out of my mind. The surreal feeling the dream was leaving me in, was both exciting and disturbing. The question was going around my head, where are these feeling I have for Casey coming from, and why do I keep having these dreams about him? If these feelings mean I'm gay, why don't I feel the same way about other guys? Why do I like girls so much? Why does it always feel like I've been doing this with Casey all my life?

What about Carrie? I mean I dream as much about her as I do him and I really do think I'm falling in love with her! She turns me on more than any other girl I've ever known. I know I haven't dated too much, but I've felt when two people are right for each other before. I feel that way with Carrie. I'm so confused because I feel so complete when I'm around her. But...

I must have just fallen asleep at some point, because the next thing I know is my alarm going off at five o'clock.

The day was fairly uneventful, although Casey seemed to be a little quieter around me then usual. Although, he seemed kind of tired and out of it. That was probably the reason. The one highlight was one of my teachers asked me to join the quiz bowl team. I told him I'd see if my new schedule would allow it but that I loved the idea of it.

I think we were all tired today. I know I was feeling tired, after last night, I felt like I had wrestled with my situation all night. Carrie was really tired today too. She said she had stayed up till midnight writing a report for her history class. She was very happy that I made the football team, though. I got an idea, I sent some energy to her and as I felt the familiar vibration starting, I quickly stopped. It must have worked, because she perked up very happy, kissed me, and then ran off to her next class.

That afternoon, Casey and I went to the locker room to get ready for the practice. He still didn't say much of anything to me. We had been, kind of, running on automatic all day. I got my new jersey. It was number eighty-two, with my name on it. I was so excited! It really brought some life in to a `bla' day. The strange thing is I'm starting to think the whole team might be gay, or mostly bi. All of the thoughts I keep picking up are ones of admiration for this guy or that. The real disturbing thing was how many of those were directed at me, not to mention Casey!

Coach took us all out on the field to warm up. We went through about an hour of stretching and light exercise. Then the real practice began. I was being careful to restrain my newfound strength. I know that if I opened up I could do things that wouldn't look natural. So I turned it off for the most part and just used it for speed bursts and to keep myself from taking any serious damage. The practice went very well. The coach seemed very happy with his choices. Both Casey and I were working well in the team.

After practice in the shower, "Great practice out there guys! I think our new additions are going to work out great." James said with a big grin. The whole shower erupted in agreement. James came up to us, "You guys did a really good job out there today. Casey, I think the only reason Leif got the top spot over you is because he's a senior. You're a better player. I wouldn't be surprised to see you start more then him. And Josh, what can I say? Are you sure you never played football for anyone else? Because you are a natural! I'm just wondering if we have even seen the real Josh out there yet. I keep getting the feeling you're holding back."

Oh my God! If he only knew? I just smiled and said, "Well James I don't want to over do it in practice." I smiled my biggest shit-eating grin.

"Well just keep it up." He said smiling as he walked over to another showerhead. He was hard as a rock. The team seemed kind of tense like they wanted to say or do something, but were afraid to. But the shower continued and then the dressing was accomplished and we were off.

My dad was waiting out side to pick us up. Adria was in the back seat. She must have had a band practice today. I got in the front seat and
Casey jumped in the back. We said hello. Dad said hello. Adria just sat there staring at Casey. Oh my God! I can't believe I'm sitting next to him and I look a mess.

You do not! You look beautiful today! I made a connection to her so I could hear her response.

Will you get out of my head! I didn't ask you to listen in on my thoughts. And Oh my God! How much did you hear?

Adria, I known you have had a crush on Casey since we moved in, and I wasn't snooping, you were broadcasting. Its ok I haven't told anyone. I'm sure dad knows after that last broadcast you made.

Oh God, Dad knows? Dammit Josh why can't I close my mind off like you and dad do? Can you teach me? I don't want dad knowing my secrets.

I can try, but it is hard to learn without a frame of reference. I'll tell you what, tonight after supper if you want, come up to my room and I'll see if I can help you.

Thank you Josh. You're the best big brother. I could feel her smile. And thanks for taking my mind off of Casey. The last thing I need right now is more embarrassment.


I'll tell you tonight.

"You guys are being awfully quiet!" dad said.

"Oh well I was just thinking about the practice today." I piped up.

"Umm...yea, me too Mr. Kingston." I got the feeling that was not really why Casey had been so quiet. I was getting the feeling Casey was trying to distance himself from me, and I really didn't like it. It made me kind of sad.

When we got home I stopped Casey as he was going to his house waving good night. "Hey, Casey, wait up a minute."

"Yea Josh, um... what's up?" He clearly looked uncomfortable.

"Hey, why have you been avoiding me?"

He went white as a ghost. "Um... I just had a...a lot on my mind. That's all!"

"Does this have anything to do with the last conversation we had? You know I have not said a word to anyone about it."

"I just...I don't really want to talk about that. It is... embarrassing, and very confusing."

"Well Casey you need to talk to someone about it, and I already know. It will make you feel better. So what's the harm?"

"But that's the problem Josh, You don't know! You only know what I've told you!" as soon as he said it his face went even paler, like he knew he shouldn't have said that. Hs clasped his mouth shut with both of his hands.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I could see his eyes watering, and the emotion I was getting from him was one of mixed confusion, frustration and fear and a little bit of anger. With out another word he turned and ran to his house. I could see the tears in the distance as they flew off his cheeks. "Wait! Casey! Comeback! I didn't mean it like that!"

I was devastated. I never meant to drive him further away, but I think that is just what I had done. I was touching something very sensitive in him and I had done it the wrong way. So I decided that I would not bring it up again. I would wait until he was ready to tell me. I could feel my emotions getting the better of me.

As tears were welling in my eyes, Carrie came running out of their front door. She looked at me and I could feel the confused anger and concern coming from her. When she noticed I was the only one outside, she seemed to become even more concerned. "Josh, did you do that to Casey?"

I was openly crying now. "I think I did. I didn't mean to though. Oh Baby, tell him that I didn't mean to upset him and that we don't ever have to talk about it again, unless he wants too. Carrie I don't want to lose the best friend I've ever had."

Carrie seemed upset at first, but after my plea she just shook her head yes and went back inside. She was looking sad herself.



Wow, look what can happen in only a few days. I never wanted things to turn out like this. How did I get my self in this mess?

Well after Saturday night, I was really having strong feelings for Josh. He's all I can think about. I think I'm falling in love, and it is killing me that I can't tell him. What would he say? What would Carrie say? Everything is telling me that I shouldn't be in love with him, with a boy, except my heart! It's tearing me apart! And fate is not helping!

So I decided to just try to back away a bit and keep my distance. I still need to be around him but I don't want to answer a bunch of questions I don't know the answer to yet.

Monday, at the tryouts, I could not believe when I saw him naked for the first time. He was just as I had dreamt him. He's not too bulky but his body has a good bit of muscle, in all the right places. His long brown hair... I'm really going to miss it, and those blue eyes that just stare into my soul. Then there was his cock, it is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

I was so mesmerized by him, I suddenly realized I was just standing there staring at him, completely naked, and I was starting to get hard, quick. I noticed Josh was looking at me and smiling. He said, "We better get going or they are going to leave us." He started laughing. God, I hope he didn't notice I was staring at him.

On the field I thought I was doing well, but Josh was outstanding. He must have really been turning it on. He was wicked fast and his hands where like glue. When that guy Will, clipped him and spun him around, I almost lost it. If coach had not been so quick to act I think I might have killed him, or at least tried. To everyone's surprise, Josh just got up and dusted himself off, like nothing had happened. I can't believe he didn't break something.

After the tryouts, in the shower, I was having a real hard time with myself. No pun intended. I was growing quickly. Then James came up to congratulate both of us. I must say he looked pretty good himself, but he was well built. I was finding myself fairly attracted to James, which is strange because until a few days ago I had never found any guy attractive and I had known James since middle school and seen him naked many times. I have never found him the least bit attractive until this moment!

Will, on the other hand is a pure asshole. I had heard about Will's recent change into school's "loose mouth". He has become a haven for all guys frustrated, and I hear he has sucked off most of the team. They all think he is funny, but really didn't appreciate his dick pointing in my direction, or the lude comments he was making.

When Coach reveled his choices, he shocked the whole team by moving Josh to tight-end, and accepting me on the team as well! I was stoked. I don't really remember the rest of the afternoon. I know it was a lot of celebrating and dad was very proud of me. Carrie wanted to know about Josh, when I told her he made the team too, she screamed. She was a bit disappointed that she couldn't go over and congratulate Josh because she had some report to finish.

Well I went straight to bed after supper. The day had been both physically and emotionally draining. I had an amazing dream again about Josh and me. We were in the locker room after a game, but we were the only ones there.

After we got under the water, I got an idea. I turned around to face Josh and grabbed the soap and started lathering up his body. I wanted to feel every inch of him. My hands felt like they where on fire when I was playing with his package. I loved the feel of his nuts spinning around in my hand.

After getting him lathered I turned around, with my back to him and held out my arms like I was on a cross. Josh moved up behind me, and wrapped his arms around me. I could feel his hard prick slide easily between my butt cheeks, and through my legs. The tip of it was pushing against the back of my balls. He was running his hands all over my body and it felt wonderful. I reached back and ran my hands over his ass.

I turned my head to the side and we embraced in a kiss. It was beyond passionate. After a few minutes I broke the kiss, and leaned forward. I wanted to feel him inside me so badly. He didn't hesitate and placed his soapy cock at my rear entrance. I got impatient, so I pushed back and moaned very loudly as he slid into me. He felt wonderful in there, like he belonged there. The dream was exquisite. It seemed to go on for quite a while until I started to feel that familiar built up.

The next thing I knew, I was in my room panting, as my dick was exploding into my shorts. It was fantastic, but then it reality sunk in. I was still having these dreams. It is making it harder and harder to get him out of my mind.

The next day was worse. I was even more withdrawn from Josh, and I was starting to feel bad about it. After practice, Josh brought up our conversation from the other day. I had really hoped he would drop it, but no such luck. After the ride home without much in the way of conversation, I thought for sure I could just wave goodbye, and get to the house, but no such luck.

"Hey, Casey, wait up a minute."

"Yea Josh, um... what's up?" I flinched. I had a bad feeling of where this might go.

"Hey, man why have you been avoiding me?"

Oh God, he noticed, I didn't realize I was being obvious about it. "Just had a...a lot on my mind. That's all!"

"Does this have anything to do with the last conversation we had? You know I have not said a word to anyone about it."

Shit! He is not going to let it drop. I was tying to think of something to say to defuse the situation. "I just...I don't really want to talk about that. It is... embarrassing, and very confusing." Wow, that didn't scream please help me! Now did it! So stupid!

"Well Casey, you need to talk to someone about it, and I already know. It will make you feel better. So what's the harm?"

My mind went blank, I just spouted off the first thing that came to mind. "But that's the problem Josh, You don't know! You only know what I've told you!" I knew I had said the wrong thing. I had just let the cat out of the bag. He knew there was more to it and that I had deceived him. My hand went up to my mouth to try to take the words back.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I could feel my emotions getting the better of me. The tears were welling up in my eyes. I had to get out of there! So I turned and just ran to the house. "Wait! Casey! Comeback! I didn't mean it like that!" I could hear him plea as I was running into the house.

I ran past Carrie who was on her was down the stairs in a hurry. She must have felt my emotions exploding. I ran past her, the look of deep concern on her face. I just ran to my room and slammed the door shut, and collapsed on my bed and cried my eyes out for well over twenty minutes. I heard the door open and then close. Then, I felt the bed move. And finally, my sister lay across me and hung her head over my shoulder so it was right beside mine.

"Did you and Joshua have a fight?"

"I really don't want to talk about it." I barely whispered.

"Ok just know that Josh was very concerned that he might have hurt you in some way. He wanted me to tell you that you two never have to talk about it again. What ever that means, I'm sure you know, but he said he couldn't stand loosing you."

I just started to cry all over again. He was concerned about loosing me. It was the most comforting thing he could have said. I must have cried myself to sleep. The next thing I remember was waking at three AM and I having to go to the bathroom. Oh Josh how can I get through this?


Next: The Big Game!