Date: Sun, 23 Oct 2005 13:31:36 EDT From: RitchChristopher@cs.com Subject: all-my-tomorrows-4 All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language, please exit now. <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> "ALL MY TOMORROWS" Copyright Ritchris 2005 sequel to "As I Remember Him" A story by Ritch Christopher <><><><><> CHAPTER FOUR It had been three days since David had learned of Luke's death. David was no longer in the Intensive Care Unit of UVA Hospital, but had been transferred to a private room on the third floor. Jerry Collins had taken Meg back home after her visit to see David. She was heartbroken after seeing her older son bandaged, sutured, and she found herself suddenly deeply depressed. Whether he wanted to be or not, Jerry was now involved in the Stanley family situation. He stopped by Meg's house twice a day to check on her to give her a little cheer and comfort...once, just before his three-to-eleven shift began on the police force and again during his dinner break around seven o'clock. The evening Meg returned home immediately after David's accident, Neil was furious partly because Meg was gone, leaving no note of her whereabouts, but mostly because his dinner wasn't ready. Meg was emotionally weak and still tearful as a result of the day's proceedings. When she mustered the courage to tell Neil about David's auto accident, that David had been in a coma for nearly a week in the UVA Hospital, and finally about Luke's tragic death, Neil only asked one question. "Is David alive or dead?" "He's alive, Neil. He'd been unconscious for nearly a week, but he came to and talked to me this afternoon..." Neil paused long enough to let her reply sink in and asked, "Well, are you going to cook me something to eat or do I have to open up some cans and eat like a dog?" He never asked anything else about David. Like a beaten puppy, Meg left Neil in the living room and went into the kitchen to prepare his evening meal. In the living room, Neil picked up the TV remote and tuned in Fox News to await his dinner. For each of three days, Jerry called the hospital daily to speak with David's nurse to inquire about his condition. Even though David was no longer her patient, Nurse Mitchell had kept a close eye on David who was now being treated with strong antidepressants. David's doctor had called for a psychiatric consultant to assess David's mental state. The psychiatric diagnosis was severe clinical depression with suicidal ideation. Maggie Cutler, a social worker at the hospital, called Luke's dad several times hoping to arrange for Luke's body to be transferred from the morgue to a mortuary, but Andrew Sparks' stubborn attitude was solid. He wanted nothing to do with his son or with his dead son's body. Finally Maggie was able to reach George Hemphill, Luke's lawyer, who had managed Luke's Aunt Delia's estate and had become Luke's legal and financial advisor. So George became Luke's 'proxy next of kin' and paid for his embalming, his casket, vault, burial plot, and miscellaneous funeral expenses out of Luke's inheritance. George did the best he could to find out if Luke was a member of a church, to learn who were his friends; and who would attend Luke's funeral, should there be one. Andrew gave George no help at all. Finally, George decided since there were no other relatives to make the decision, he opted to just bury Luke privately with no one attending the burial except the grave diggers. George knew nothing of Luke's new relationship with David...and so Luke was buried quietly without being noticed by anyone. Once the sod had been placed on Luke's grave, George drove to the cemetery to get an idea of what kind of marker to buy for Luke. To George's surprise, he discovered a single wreath of chrysanthemums on the plot. A card was still attached from the florist. George opened the small envelope and read, 'Your old school buddy, Jerry Collins'. When George returned to his law office, he looked in the River Oaks telephone directory and found Jerry's name, address, and number. George dialed it immediately and it was answered on the third ring. "Hello?" "Is this Jerry Collins?" "Yes, it is...?" "My name is George Hemphill. I'm an attorney. I'm calling to ask if you knew Luke Sparks?" "Yes, I did." "Then might I inquire if it was you who sent the flowers to the cemetery?" "Well, yes, I did. I...I didn't know when and where--or IF--there was going to be a funeral or a graveside service. I found out from the UVA hospital that Luke's body had been sent to Gibson's Mortuary, only to discover there was to be no wake for Luke and he had been buried the following day after they had prepared his body." "Your card read, 'your old school buddy'. Were you and he classmates at VMI?" "No, sir, we were friends at River Oaks High." "Did you remain friends after high school?" "No, sir. He..left and went to a military school and I never saw him again." "May I ask how you learned about Luke's death?" "Yes, sir, but it's kind of complicated. First of all, I'm a policeman with the R.O.P.D.. Luke had a passenger in the car with him...David Stanley. It was my duty to go to Luke's house and notify his father about Luke's accident and his subsequent death. Then I drove by David's house, just a few blocks from Luke's house, to see how David was doing. As I said, it's a long story, but David's mother knew nothing about the accident and she asked if I would take her to the hospital to see her son. Do you know the Stanley's, Mr. Hemphill?" "Do you mean Neil Stanley?" "Yes, sir." "Along with the Stanley's, we're members of the Kiwanis Club and also the River Oaks Country Club. Didn't he go with you to the hospital?" "No, sir..." "I can only imagine why..." "Sir?" "If David was riding in the car with Luke, I can only surmise that Neil's reaction was similar to the one I received from Andrew Sparks, Luke's father." "I see you must know both of them pretty well, Mr. Hemphill." "Please forget I said this, but they're both a couple of jackasses! How is David doing? Was he injured severely? I mean, as a policeman, do you foresee David suing Luke's estate for the accident?" "Physically, from what I've been told by David's nurses, he's recovering quite nicely...but mentally and emotionally, I understand he's in a bit of trouble." "Jerry, I know you said you haven't seen Luke since high school, but are you aware of Luke's social life?" "Are you asking if I knew he was gay?" "Well..yes. Do you think that there was more to David's being in the car with Luke than just a friend taking a ride with him?" "Do you mean do I think they were lovers?" "Yes...if you don't mind asking...?" "I...Well, Meg--Mrs. Stanley--hinted at something like that. I didn't believe her at first, but I was there when David found out the Luke was dead and the things David said convinced me that perhaps they WERE lovers." "Speaking professionally as an attorney to a law officer, that puts me in a bit of a quandary." "Sir...?" "Well, as Luke's financial executor, Luke left no will. No doubt you heard he was quite wealthy when he died. Andrew wants nothing to do with Luke's inheritance from his aunt and I'm at a loss for what to do with his estate." "Apparently, Luke and David's relationship was newly founded...." "Oh, I wasn't thinking about making David Luke's heir, although I'm sure that's what Luke might have wanted...but legally..." "I see what you mean, sir." "Jerry, do you plan on visiting David again?" "I thought I would, probably this weekend." "Would you keep me informed about his condition? I don't believe Luke can be held responsible for the accident, but I'm sure Luke would want me to pay for David's hospitalization and treatment. I mean, even if he doesn't sue, it seems the right thing to do." "I'm sure David will appreciate that, sir. I...I think there's a big distance between David and his dad...." "I'm sure there is!" "...and I don't know anything about David's hospital insurance or what's being paid for." "I'll contact the hospital myself and arrange for the bills to be sent to me, just in case there's no insurance to cover them. In the meanwhile, if David gives you a clue about anything he needs, please call me." "Yes sir, I will!" "I'll give you my home and office numbers and I'll also have them written on David's hospital chart in case there's any kind of emergency treatment needed." Jerry wrote down George's telephone numbers and put them into his wallet. "Mr. Hemphill, I'll call you after I see David and let you know where things stand." "That's great, Jerry. Thank you very much!" "No problem." George hung up his phone. <><><><><><><><><> Jerry's usual off-days from work were Mondays and Tuesdays, but he asked a fellow policeman if he'd swap days-off with him so he could have Sunday off to go to see David. Jerry didn't explain all the details about David, but just enough to play on his buddy's sympathy and it worked. Jerry's next thought was to invite Meg to go with him, but since it was Sunday and Neil was off work, it might not be wise to suggest it to her. Jerry didn't want awkward questions raised. Actually David had from Sunday morning until three o'clock Monday to spend time with David without having to hurry back. He could even spend the night in a hotel or motel in Charlottesville, a sort of 'one day/one night' vacation. It had been five days since he had seen David and Jerry didn't know what to expect when he arrived at the hospital. At the end of the hall on David's floor was a visitor's solarium which was also a place the patients used to spend some time away from their hospital rooms. That's where Jerry found David...sitting alone in a wheelchair, although there were other patients and their Sunday visitors also in the large sunny room. Whomever had brought David from his room had parked him in front of a window and David was staring blankly at the grounds below. Jerry approached him slowly and gently placed his hand on David's shoulder. David apparently wasn't even aware of Jerry's touch because he didn't move or look at Jerry. "Hello, David," Jerry said, quietly. Hearing his name, David looked up and noticed Jerry. He looked a bit dazed but still managed to give Jerry a slight but warm smile. "Hello..." David replied. "You DO remember me from the other day, don't you?" "Yes. It was you who brought my mother to see me. Jerry? Right?" David's recognizing Jerry made Jerry sigh with relief as he remembered Nurse Mitchell saying that David was being tranquilized with antidepressants. "How are you feeling?" "I think I'm NOT feeling..." "Got you on a lot of medications, have they?" "I think they've changed my diet from food to pills. That's all I can remember swallowing for the past few days." David was more lucid than Jerry had expected. "Has anyone mentioned when you might be getting out of here?" Jerry asked, cautiously. "Probably never..." "Why would you say that?" "Because I have no place to go..." "David, don't you want to get better and go back to the university?" "I quit, Jerry. I moved out of my dorm." "I...I didn't know." "I don't think anyone does...well, I'm sure everyone at the university knows by now." "Has...uh...Jenny been by to see you?" "No...Jenny is just a person in my past. We...or rather I, broke off our engagement." "Wow! That's heavy." "Jerry, since no one has been to see me since you and Mom left the other day, I've had no one to talk with about private matters." "Well, I'm here now, pal, if you want to talk." "Jerry, two weeks ago if anyone had told me that I had homosexual tendencies, I would have told them they were crazy or they didn't know the real me." "Two weeks ago?" "Yeah, the week I went to Atlanta to see about Mark..." "Did some of Mark's friends...'approach' you...get you drunk and, well, make you do things against your better judgment?" "Oh, a few of them came on to me, but I sloughed them off. They knew I was straight...just as I did." "Then--what happened?" "Luke came down to attend Mark's memorial service and we...well, we spent the night together...in the same bed." "Oh...?" "Jerry, it was as if Merlin slammed me over the head with his magic wand because, inside of two days, I found myself in love with Luke...deeply, passionately, and totally in love...MORE in love than I'd ever been in my entire life." "I...I never heard of such a thing happening. I mean, at the police academy, we had a class which touched on homosexuality, but my instructor told us that it was inherited at birth...something in the genes...not just something someone decides to become." "That's what I thought, too." "So, you and Luke were going to live together?" "WERE...past tense." David said. Jerry looked closely at David to see if talking about Luke was upsetting him or if David was about to cry, but David remained calm. "Actually, Luke took me to UVA to get my things from the dorm and to say goodbye to Jenny..." "Then what?" "We were going to move to New York and the two of us were going to enroll at Columbia in January...I, as a senior, and Luke, well he had enough credits from VMI to enter his sophomore year." "So you got your things, said goodbye to Jenny and...were you headed back to River Oaks when...well...?" "When we ran into the truck? Yes. Luke was going to sell or lease his condo and we were moving to New York as soon as that transaction was settled." "Damn! David! You had more than just a traffic accident..." "Yes, Jerry, when Luke's car wrecked, my world came to an end. I got angry when I saw my dad and blurted out that I was gay and Luke was my lover. That ruined any kind of reconciliation with my dad in the future. I ended my senior year at school. I ditched my relationship with Jenny and now I have nowhere to go and no one to be with. I'm angry with God that he didn't take me when he took Luke." "You mean there's no one at all? No buddies at school? No relatives you could stay with?" "No, Jerry, no one. I won't lie to you. Just before you came in, I was sitting here wondering how I could jump through this window and end it all. Then I wouldn't have to worry about money, relatives, friends, or a place to stay." "Have you thought anything about...well, about Luke's auto insurance? I mean, you WERE a passenger and there might be a monetary provision for your injuries." "What? Sue Luke? Did you forget? Luke's dead...just like I want to be." "Look, David, I might have stuck my nose in where it's not wanted, but Luke's lawyer called me and I told him about you and about your being in the hospital. I'm sure you knew about the money Luke inherited from his Aunt Delia. Well, anyway, George Hemphill, Luke's lawyer and the acting executor of Luke's estate, said that anything you wanted or needed, he would pay for. He wants to come up and see you. I guess you know Luke's situation with his dad. Mr. Sparks doesn't want a dime of Luke's money and George is stuck with, God knows, MILLIONS, I guess and there's no one to award it to, since Luke didn't have a will. You SHOULD make a small claim to get by on until you get back on your feet and decide what you want to do or where you want to go. No one could deny that you don't deserve some remuneration for what happened to you. Then, of course, the truck driver might be blamed...and he's covered by insurance...or at least, the company he works for is." "It wouldn't seem right, Jerry, spending Luke's money when we had planned to share it together." "Let me hit you with another idea that just occurred to me. I...I live alone. My house isn't big, but it's big enough! You could come stay with me for a while or for as long as you like. I work the three-to-eleven shift, but I'm sure Mr. Hemphill would pay for someone to be with you during the hours I work." "I don't know, Jerry..." "Well, will you just think about it and give the thought some consideration? I mean, we USED to be friends by proxy...well, Mark and I were friends, but I saw you at the house many times while I was visiting him." "You knew Luke, didn't you?" "Yeah, there were five or six of us guys who hung out at each other's houses after school." "Did you know he was gay back then?" "Oh, I'd heard rumors, but then there were rumors about me being a hippy with my tattoos and pierced eyebrow. None of us ever listened to what was said about us. We didn't care." "Did you know about Mark?" "Nah! He and Luke were close, but then we ALL were close and I wasn't gay, and none of the rest of the guys were...of course now, I can't be sure." "You mean about yourself or the other guys?" "Oh, no, man! Hey! I might not have time to have a girlfriend, but I'm not gay...not that I have anything against gay people. Hell, the police academy frowned on any kind of discrimination...race, color, religion, OR sex. We'd gotten our asses kicked out if we even hinted at being prejudicial toward anyone or anything." "I...I wasn't trying to pry into your private life, Jerry, it's just...well, I'm so fucking confused. I wasn't gay before Luke and now that he's gone...I don't know how I feel. Of course with all these drugs the doctor keeps poking down my throat, I might never get another erection as long as I live." "I've heard they can make you think you've lost your manhood." "Lost..and forgotten..." "Whaddya say? You wanna come stay with me? The rent is right and I always cook for two anyway. Unless I heat up a TV dinner, I've discovered I can't cook for just one person, so I wind up eating for two. You'd practically be doing me and 'watching my weight' a favor." "Jerry, I have to say, you've given me the first ray of hope I've had since I learned about Luke." "David, I hope it's all right to tell you this, but George took care of Luke...if you know what I mean. He bought Luke's casket, burial, and has even ordered a marker for his grave." "Dear God, that takes a load off my mind. I...I didn't know who to ask, but I'm so glad that someone saw to it that he had a decent burial." "I...I visited Luke's grave. It's in a lovely spot at the River Oaks Memorial Cemetery. I...well, I bought a wreath..." "Thank you, Jerry. I DO appreciate everything you've done." David had to blink to hold back the tears. "You...uh... haven't had time to look for my luggage from the crash, have you?" "As a matter of fact, I did. When I described the four pieces to the VHP, I was told they were brought to the hospital. I checked with Maggie, the social worker, and was told that they are locked up in hospital security." "All FOUR pieces, including the small one?" "Yes." "I guess I told you that Mark's ashes are inside it and I just wanted to make sure they weren't lost." "I'm sure they're safe and sound." "Jerry, do you think it would be appropriate if I placed Mark alongside of Luke?" "If you're asking my opinion, I think it's a wonderful idea. It would be nice for you, knowing that the two people whom you loved most are together." "Would...would you go with me to...well, I'd really like to scatter Mark's ashes on Luke's grave...?" "I'd be honored, David. Mark and Luke were friends and they SHOULD be together. They were my friends as well." "Jerry, you've been so good to me. I hope this doesn't put a burden on you, but you seem to be the only friend I have." "Maybe, but I can be a better one, if you'll move in with me." "I'll discuss it with the social worker. I suppose she's having a nervous breakdown trying to write my discharge plan. If I tell her about your idea, it'll be a big relief to her, I'm sure." "I think I like the idea of having you for a roommate." "Jerry, please don't let my sexuality interfere with our friendship. I... I suppose you must have thought I was 'coming on' to you the other day when I asked you to hold me. I'm sure that seemed strange to you." "Not really...now, don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes when I'm out patrolling, I'll occasionally see a dog that's been hit by a car. I mean, you just can't call for an EMT unit to come take care of a dying animal. So I get out of my car and sometimes hold the little guy in my arms until he passes away. So if I can hold a hurt puppy, why can't I hold the brother of an old school chum?" "You know, you are so damned nice and considerate, why in hell hasn't some young woman trapped you? You're gonna make a fine husband to one of them." "Shoot, David, I can't find the time to date. What girl wants to go to dinner and to a movie before three in the afternoon when I start my shift? AND what kind of woman wants to go out with me after midnight?" "Do I detect that you're lonely, Jerry?" "David, you just don't know..." "I think I do. I pray to God that your dad wasn't like mine and Mark's while we were growing up. Can you imagine eating dinner at my home with my dad and mom and still feeling like you were the only one there? I never got to know Mark as I should have, but he had to travel hundreds of miles to find his own family among his friends. I'm sure he was lonely. I...I've been lonely nearly all my life, in spite of being engaged to two different girls. In retrospect, I think I dated them to keep from being alone." "Well, if we become roommates, I WON'T be your lover, but I will be your best friend, if you'll have me." "Looks like you're all I've got...and I don't mean that detrimentally." "In the long run, as long as you live with me, you'll be all I've got." "God help us both!" "He will, David, believe me!" <><><><><><><><><><> Before entering the police academy, Jerry had lived at home with his parents. The Collins went to the same church that the Fairbanks, Jenny's father and mother, attended. Jenny was a couple of years older than Jerry, but he could hardly keep his eyes off her whenever he saw her. She had been a masturbatory fantasy for Jerry during his teen years. When he learned that Jenny was engaged to be married to David, Mark's older brother, Jerry's heart sank. What he wouldn't give to be in David's shoes or better still, what wouldn't he give to be in David's bed while Jenny was there to make love. Now all of a sudden, Jenny was free of her relationship with David, and even though she was a senior at the university, she still visited her parents quite often on the weekends. Jerry would love to get the chance to meet her, even if it meant he had to go to church with his mom and dad just to see her. However, if David moved in with Jerry, would Jerry have the balls to ask Jenny out on a date while her 'ex' was living with him, the guy who wanted to go out with her? Jerry had just unknowingly complicated his own life. He didn't have time to date, but with Jenny free, he would MAKE time...but should he ask her out with David's knowledge?... or would David actually care, now that David had chosen a gay lifestyle? But then, David was only gay while Luke was alive. Would David suddenly switch back to his heterosexual past life or was he dyed-in-the-wool gay now? Would David become jealous if he knew Jerry was dating or at least wanted to date Jenny? What kind of friction would this cause between any of the three of them? Jerry realized he was putting the horse before the cart. He hadn't even talked with Jenny, much less asked her to go out with him. But, God, would he like to! Jerry was sincere about asking David to stay with him and matters grew worse for Jerry's social hopes when David accepted Jerry's offer. <><><><><><><><><> Once Maggie, the hospital discharge planner, learned of David's financial support from George Hemphill, Luke's attorney, she felt a huge burden relieved from her shoulders. She liked the idea of David's moving in with Jerry, provided George would supply the funding for a sitter who could also act as a physical therapist and one who would assist in getting David's mental state more stabilized. The person who could do all three tasks would have to be a very special person, one with proper training in each capacity, but it also meant 'he' or 'she' would charge an exorbitant fee for his or her services. Jerry's house wasn't large enough for two boarders...David and the 'sitter', so the sitter would only work the hours while Jerry was working as a policeman...three-to-eleven. This also meant that the 'sitter' would have to give up most evenings and the weekend...BUT, Maggie knew if the sitter's price was met by George, there shouldn't be a problem finding the right candidate for the job. He would have to be compatible with David, who was recovering from the depression caused by his tragic loss...Luke and he or she would have to be under crime-free, drug-free, general bad-habits-free scrutiny while working at the home of a police officer. The first thing Maggie did was to call 'M.A. Finders', similar to 'Nurse Finders' who assisted in placing Medical Assistants in various places depending on the expertise of their skills. 'M.A. Finders' gave Maggie a list of seven people who might be suitable for the tasks required of David's sitter. Oddly enough, all seven were males, which pleased Maggie since she had originally thought that David should have male companionship. Maggie had taken David's medical and social histories and had learned of his break up with Jenny. She preferred that the 'sitter' would not be gay, as she didn't want to exacerbate David's newly 'discovered' homosexual tendencies. As she interviewed each candidate, she was careful not to bring up the topic of sexual preference because she knew she could be accused of discrimination. She looked for someone approximately the same age as David, pleasantly nice-looking, definitely not a 'hunk', but then, what 'hunk' would apply for such a position? Maggie narrowed her search down to two young men, both bachelors, Darryl Aikens and Richard Sawyer. Each was qualified, but she thought it best if David got to meet both of them and make the choice himself, since he'd be spending weeks or even months with the chosen one. So she asked each of them to meet David, individually, in the solarium for a chat and give David a chance to ask whatever questions he would like. Darryl was short, about 5'8" tall, with an average build, not exactly handsome, but was skilled in psychology and physical therapy. He was Maggie's first choice, but decided not to let her preference influence David's decision. Richard, on the other hand, was tall, over six feet, quite muscular. Had he had been an athlete sometime in his past? His training in psychology was not as extensive as Darryl's, but he had many letters of recommendation from former patients concerning his ability as a physical therapist. Neither of them gave Maggie the impression that he was gay. Darryl was more soft-spoken than Richard, who seemed more gregarious and openly friendly. Maggie instructed both men not to mention how much they were charging by the hour. Had David known that George was to pay either of them four-hundred dollars per day for 'babysitting' him, David would surely have dismissed both of them. David spoke with Darryl and Richard privately, for over an hour each. He inquired about their favorite food, music, books, TV shows, movies, actors, actresses, presidents, and hobbies. Darryl was non-descript with most of his answers. He said he liked ALL food, all kinds of music and books. He didn't watch TV enough to have a favorite show. He seldom went to movie theaters but opted to watch DVD's rented from Blockbuster, nor could he single out a particular actor or actress of whom he was a fan. He almost refused to answer David about who was his favorite president, but this seemed important to David and finally, Darryl stated that he had voted for George W. Bush in the last two elections. It was unfortunate that Darryl let this fact be known because David took an instant dislike to Darryl. David thought that anyone stupid enough to vote for Bush was someone he didn't want to be around. Next, it was Richard's turn to be quizzed. David learned that Richard liked hamburgers and pizza, but when he had a date, he would always go to a French restaurant because he loved French sauces. Richard's mother had been a jazz singer, so he preferred the older singers and the standard songs... Sinatra, Ella, Nancy Wilson, Barbra, and he loved saxophone music by Stan Getz, Paul Horn, Paul Desmond, and Johnny Hodges. The newer sax men? Scott Hamilton, he answered without a moment's hesitation. Books? Richard had read all of the John Grisham and Tom Clancy novels. Favorite actor and actress? Anthony Hopkins and Meryl Streep. Then came the sixty-four-thousand dollar question...presidents! Richard confessed he had not voted during the past two elections. He didn't like Albert Gore OR John Kerry, but he definitely hated George Bush...BOTH George Bushes! He thought that Bill Clinton had been the greatest president since Franklin Roosevelt! That was all David needed to hear. Richard was David's choice and he let Maggie know as soon as he could...and so, Richard Sawyer was hired immediately and was to begin work the following Monday, just as soon as David was discharged to Jerry's house. Richard accepted the position, not because of the money, but mainly because he found David very attractive. Richard had liked David instantly and David's feelings for Richard were seemingly identical. Richard looked forward to giving his new client physical, as well as emotional, stability. From their brief conversation, they felt a mutual compatibility, sensing that their time together could be fun as well as being constructive. Richard knew nothing about Luke, Jenny or David's family background, but Richard's 'gaydar' registered 'off the dial' while he was talking with David. Secretly, Richard hoped that David was single and also that David and Jerry were not a couple! <><><><><><><><><> (To be continued in "All My Tomorrows" chapter five.)