Date: Sun, 24 Oct 2010 18:14:19 -0400
From: Mark Hankering <mhankering@gmail.com>
Subject: Fag Stag, Markie Martin

I had always imagined my friend Markie was at least a little bit gay.  He
was one of the few straight guys I felt comfortable around, like we had
anything to talk about.  He wears the label "fag stag" proudly -- he loves
meeting my gay friends. I think he has always enjoyed hanging out with us
because we accept him for who he is.  I also think he likes being flattered
by other guys telling him how attractive he is and how lucky girls are that
he is straight.  Its true, girls really do go crazy for him, especially the
fag hag types.  In that way, he is a lot like the rest of us, dating within
our friend circle.  It is incestuous, but this is gay life in a small city.
And apparently for the fag hags and Markie, they are along for the ride of
partner swapping.

Markie had never come on to me, although we do flirt quite a bit.  For fun,
he is often holding my hand, or picking lint off my clothing in public.  I
don't mind -- it is something we have been doing for years now, and it
doesn't harm anyone.  But it has never gone farther than that.  I am glad,
because it would probably ruin our friendship.  It has certainly crossed my
mind, and when I drink too much it seems like a good idea, but it has never
happened.  We've even shared the same bed and cuddled.  This is usually
after a night out drinking, and I have to be the little spoon so I don't
poke him.  I think he knows, but he's a great guy and plays along.

Markie is definitely more my friend than the rest of the gays in our group.
We've been friends for several years now.  We met when I was dating his
brother, James.  It didn't last long.  James was crazy and a bit of a drama
queen.  I am a little bit embarrassed that we dated, though I don't talk
about that with Markie too much because he loves his brother and accepts
him the way he is.  I don't see James very often now that he lives in
California, but we are cordial to each other around the holidays.  He is
convinced that Markie and I are fucking, though neither one of us works too
hard to deny it.  In a weird way, I just think he is jealous.

I wonder if Markie started hanging out with me only to understand his
brother.  He knew nothing about gay culture, and had never really talked
with James about it.  I was one of the few guys James had ever taken home,
so his family thought it was a really serious relationship.  I don't think
I ever had serious intentions with him, so in retrospect it would have been
more respectful to stay away from his family, but now I'm glad I went.  The
Martins have more or less adopted me as another son.  They've never said
anything about Markie and I, but I'm sure they wonder.

When I met Markie, he was dating a girl, Cathy.  She was nice enough, I
don't really remember her.  I only met her that one time when I went over
the Martin's for dinner.  I think I had talked to everyone but her. A
couple weeks later, Markie showed up alone to the double date he and Cathy
were supposed to be having with James and I.  That double-date turned third
wheel is really what forged my friendship with Markie.  We went to the same
university (though we had never known eachother), liked a lot of the same
shows, and we also had fun slamming Cathy.  He seemed to be a bit raw about
it, but seemed more or less happy that it was over. It wasn't until a few
months later that I learned she had actually broken up with him. And it was
a couple years after that I learned that he was thinking of proposing to
her.  Neither of us can make sense of why he was thinking that, but things
are always clearer in retrospect.

During that dinner, we all but ignored James.  I feel awful, still, about
the whole thing.  I kept comparing him to Cathy and badmouthing the "women"
in our lives.  Halfway through the dinner I realized how much of an asshole
I was being, but I knew I wanted to end it with James anyway.  It was
particularly painful after that, because he wanted to "work through it",
even after the awful things I said.

I just stopped calling James, and called Markie instead.  I really wanted
to make more straight friends, and Markie seemed genuinely interested in
who I was.  It wasn't until James moved away and Markie had a few beers in
him that he confronted me and told me how much I had hurt James.

"I like hanging out with you, man.  But I guess I was surprised to learn
that gay guys can be assholes too."

I was shocked, and really embarrassed.  I desperately wanted Markie to like
me, and I already felt bad about how I was treating James.

"Sorry.  I know I can be an asshole.  I'm sorry it didn't work out between
us."

"Well, you didn't have to treat him like that.  He's my brother, you know."

My face felt hot.  Normally I feel angry when I'm hurt, but in this
instance, in this stupid loud sports pub filled with men, I wanted to cry
and apologize.

"I'm sorry.  I've got to learn to treat guys better.  I think I still treat
them like women."

"Well, just don't treat me like that, man.  How am I supposed to respect
gay guys and treat you all like human beings when you're setting such a bad
example?"

I felt like he had punched me in the stomach.  He was totally right, and he
was touching upon something I hadn't let myself think about.

Markie convinced me that I needed gay friends.  He felt guilty about the
way he had treated his brother over the years as well, so we decided to
make friends together.  I only knew guys I had gone on dates with or had
sex with.  I had very few gay friends who I would hang out with, and none
who I would hang out with regularly.  At that time in my life, I didn't
really have any close friends.  I think that's why I latched onto Markie so
much.  I was more or less out by the time I had met him, but I still hadn't
accepted myself, and I definitely had not accepted the gay community.

So we started hanging out with my friends Chuck and Leo.  I had gone on a
couple dates with Leo, but we had decided we weren't really into eachother,
which was one of the few relationships that I had which didn't go down into
flames.  Chuck and Leo had been together more or less since Leo and I
stopped dating, and I had had dinner with them a couple of times.  Chuck
has been out for a long time and I think he was very relieved when he found
Leo and he could finally settle down.  This was almost 4 years ago now, and
they are still as happy as ever.

Being a more outgoing gay, Chuck has many gay friends, and I have gotten to
know most of them since.  I have to say I've also used his friend network
for dates and hookups, but I have learned that this is just the way of
things and not to be ashamed.  Markie knows a lot of these guys too because
I take him to the parties.  He's become a real fag stag, though he very
rarely goes to these parties without me.  I'm his wingman, cock blocking
the guys who think they can flip him or the occasional overzeleous hag.

Most of the guys know that he is straight and respect that.  He's come a
long way and can totally pass for gay now.  He has relaxed a lot, probably
as good if not better than I have.  But I think he is the forbidden fruit,
and sometimes guys just want a bite.  He takes the compliments and friendly
touches in stride -- usually letting a third party tell the hopeful homo
know he's not going to get lucky.  But then there is Benjamin.  Benjamin
used to be a go-go boy.  He still has a killer body.  He's young, tiny and
hairless, and full of energy.  He's used to getting what he wants, and he
decided long ago that he wanted Markie.  And for whatever reason, Markie
liked to fuel the fire.  He flirted with Benjamin more than anyone, often
putting his arms around him, and dancing with him at parties or in the
clubs.  Despite trying very hard and bragging to everyone else that he
would succeed, Benjamin could never bed Markie.  There were a few times
that even I thought it was going to happen.  I'm glad it didn't because as
soon as Benjamin had Markie, he would move on to his next conquest.  That
is just the way he is.  If you can't tell, I'm not a big fan.

About two years after I met Markie, and almost a year after Benjamin
started hanging around, a bunch of us went up to a ski lodge for a long
weekend.  I did not (and I do not think Markie did either) know that it was
a boys-only weekend.  By this time, he'd learned that the fag hags were
easy picking for him, and he could have relatively strings-free sex with
them when he wanted it.  But not this weekend, it would be just Markie and
the boys.  And of course, Benjamin.

Well, it all started off in great fun.  That first Friday night, we all got
pretty drunk, though we were drinking slowly, playing games and eating the
whole time.  By 10 pm, there were already guys disappearing into the many
rooms and closets of the house.  There was no denying it, this was designed
to be a debaucherous weekend.  The boys were all in various stages of
undress -- some having re-dressed just to play another round of strip
poker.  I was having fun, but for whatever reason, I just wasn't feeling
any of the guys there.

I couldn't help but notice that all of the guys seemed to be fawning over
Markie.  They were eager to refill his drink, and they all wanted talk with
him.  I wanted to protect him, but I felt a certain amount of hostility
from the others -- I felt like I couldn't get near him.  Everyone knew we
weren't dating -- believe me, we all knew he was straight -- and at that
time Markie wasn't very affectionate towards me.  That was fine, because as
good of friends as we were, I just couldn't treat him like another gay guy.
But this evening, none of the other guys seemed to be having this problem,
and I found it quite frustrating.  And Markie didn't even seem to mind.

In fact, he didn't even need me -- he had his own cock-block system set up.
For most of the night, he had his arm around Benjamin's waist, or over his
shoulder.  At the particular moment I found myself caught in, he had
Benjamin pulled up to him, leaning against him, while he had both arms
wrapped around, playing cards with the other guys.  My friend Markie -- my
straight friend, with no shirt on, no socks, and a great big smile.  And
Benjamin, relaxed and laughing, in impossibly short cutoff jeans and
nothing else, except the knowledge that he was a sexy, frustrating
lightning-rod of envy.

And that's when it happened.  Probably because Benjamin was helping Markie
lose, Markie now had to take off his pants.  I had already watched the
clothes come off, piece by piece.  I saw the smug excitement when Benjamin
whipped off Marie's belt.  I had heard the cheers from all the guys - that
they were now getting to see all of Markie as they had been wanting to,
mixed with nervous sips of booze and staring as the envy cut through the
fanfare.  And now, his pants were coming off.

Benjamin stood up, peeling his body off of Markie's, and as he did so, he
pushed his ass into and off of Markie's crotch.  Turning around, Benjamin
helped Markie stand up straight.  I realized at this moment that Benjamin
had been drinking very little that night, just taking little sips.  And
with all of the refills, Markie was bleary-eyed drunk.  As Benjamin
crouched down to work on Markie's zipper, Markie held onto his shoulder to
keep his balance.  By this time, I was practically seething.  I couldn't
believe that Markie had gotten himself into this situation, and I was fully
aware that I was jealous that it was not me.  With the button and fly open,
pulled aside like wings for his cock and balls to be set free, I saw
Benjamin and Markie exchange a look.  Benjamin, with his toothy smile and
carnal request, and Markie's lazy wink and sloppy nod.

With the denim pooled at his feet, and Benjamin helping him step out,
Markie was laughing.

"Take it all off!" Someone yelled.  Everyone in the room was silent, and
looking at the action.

"Not yet!" Markie replied.

"Well you gotta take it off for someone!" was the reply.

Finished derobing Markie, Benjamin rose up where he stood, just inches
below Markie's chin.

"All set" He said, looking up at Markie.

"Thank you" Markie said, then inexplicably grabbing both sides of
Benjamin's head, he kisses him full on the lips.

Deciding this thank-you kiss is as far as this is going to go, I start to
make my way over to end this nonsense.  But Leo, who I've been
halfheartedly chatting with, grabs my wrist.  I look down, then up at him,
waiting for an explanation.  He gives me a stern look, and Chuck steps in
front of me.

Through Chuck's fluffy hair, I can see as Benjamin pushes into Markie.
Hard into his hips, as he holds on tight, hard into his face as he throws
his tongue into Markie's mouth.  Hard into his chest, as Benjamin pushes
him down into the couch behind.  Markie falls hard, but in an instant,
Bejamin is up in his lap, without breaking the vacuum between their lips.
Markie does not resist, in fact, he moves both of his hands to Benjamin's
ass, forcing the grind down onto his cock, while Benjamin hungrily lashes
the inside of his mouth.

"That's so hot," I can hear Chuck say.  I am fuming, and Leo is still
holding onto my wrist.

"He's a grown man."  He says.

"This is good for him." Chuck adds.

I try to escape, to intervene, but Leo pulls on my arm.  Chuck pushes back
into me, as they create a man sandwich to keep me from getting away.

I struggle, frustrated and feeling betrayed, while my two best gay friends
keep me from helping my best straight friend get away from something he
will severely regret.

But as I struggle, I realize Markie is liking it.  He is giving the guys a
good show, and Benjamin, who was born on stage, is thrilled to be the
supporting actor.  I realize at this moment that I may be forced to watch
my best friend have sex with a guy for the first time in front of dozens of
gay men.

"Caleb, you're hard" Chuck says.

"What?" I respond.

"You're hard.  You are getting off on this."

I stop struggling.  I stop, and realize that in fact, I am raging hard and
I can feel the heat from my cock, and the ache in my balls, and the close
contact with Chuck's ass.

I realize this, as Benjamin is pulling Markie up, and to the cheers from
the crowd, pulling him into a bedroom.  Markie follows, and he doesn't look
back.  I realize this is a lost cause.

"You could play with us, tonight." Leo says, and then I notice his cock is
also hard, and he slowly pushes it into my side.

I feel frustrated and confused, and surprisingly, really horny.  As I watch
my best friend walk into a room with a gay boy I never trusted, I realize
life is never what you're expecting.  The door shuts, and I let go of all
preconceptions.

"Let's do it" I respond.

Being some of the benefactors for the weekend, Leo and Chuck had a bedroom
reserved, with a private bathroom.  They showered first, and while I
cleaned up they prepared the room.  On the way in, I noticed the bottle of
wine, but as I step out of the steam in my towel, I notice the low lights,
the mood music, and Chuck bare on the bed.  Leo, with a match in one hand,
holds the towel wrapped around his waist with the other.  Even though we
did not date for very long, I can not say that I'm not attracted to him.  I
have never seen his smooth dark skin and the curls of hair on his chest.
His strong arms with prominent veins, and the confident swagger of a man
who knows he's going to get laid.

"Drop your towels" Chuck says.  Surprised at his sexual aggression, I watch
as Leo shakes out the match and releases the towel.  It falls to the floor,
revealing a forest of hair and the trunk of an enormous, curved cock.

"Get over here, handsome" Chuck says.

Leo strides over to Chuck, and my eyes do not leave his cock, even as the
shining purple head bobs in and out of his tight foreskin.  He climbs up
onto the bed, on all fours, and kisses Chuck deeply.  They break the kiss,
and Chuck says "You too, Caleb.  Get over here if you want some of this."

As he says that, Chuck's surprisingly pink cock jumps.  His wrinkled
ballsack is pulled up close, and I can see his prostate through the
almost-white fuzz of hair.  His legs are strong, with veins popping out
like Leo's arms braced on either side of him.  I drop my towel, and my
member breathes deep and swings out -- I have been hard nonstop since I
said I would do this.

I head straight for Chuck's cock, and make first contact with a bead of
precum.  Never having thought of him sexually while fully clothed, Chuck,
naked and with hidden demands, was now turning me on hardcore.

Although I'd had my fair share of cocks, I never considered myself an
expert cocksucker, but this time I am determined to take him all in.  I can
feel the veins on my tongue, and as I push down onto him, I can feel the
ridge of his cockhead swell against my tonsils.  I go up and down several
times, building up a rhythm and lubrication.  As I do pushups over his
cock, and I can feel the scratch hair of Leo's thigh moving beside me.

I'm too filled with lust and cock to look how Leo is rearranging himself.
I feel something brush against my cheekbone and along my eyesocket.  When I
pull off Chuck to look, I feel a more insistent push against the fleshy
hollow in my cheek.  Leo is pushed up into a side plank, and his swollen
cock is pointed straight at my face.  Both he and Chuck are looking down at
me, smiling and waiting.

I test a lick on Leo's enormous cock, so smooth, but I'm not sure I can fit
it inside my mouth.  I lick around the ridge, salty and musky, and gently
scrape my teeth along the way.  He pushes at me, and I take half, maybe
three quarters of his cockhead into my mouth.  He backs up, and shoves
again.  This time, he gets it in, and I strain to keep my teeth from
closing down on it.  I pull off, shaking my head to tell him I can't do it,
and then continue to lick around and suck on it where I can.  The angle is
difficult for me, so I switch back to Chuck's cock.

While Leo shifts away from us, Chuck slides back so that he is sitting up
against the headboard.  I follow his cock, swiping at his balls and his
legs with my tongue as we go.  I get up on all fours, and then begin making
my way up his stomach to his nipples.

I feel Leo up behind me, and he reaches between my legs and fondles my cock
and balls.  He holds me with a strange grip that feels great but rough.
Then, I feel the scratching of his goatee on my taint, as he breathes deep
into my ass.  I've never had anyone eat me out before, but having been
hopeful, I washed thoroughly in the shower.  Leo tests my hole with his
tongue.  It feels warm and wet and uncontrollable, and liking what he
finds, he pushes inside of me.  I feel my asshole fill with what feels like
a warm and moving liquid, but his tongue is surprisingly strong as it
pushes against my sphincter and forces it to stretch open.  Soon, he is
eating my ass as hungrily as Benjamin was churning inside Markie's mouth.

Lust overpowers regret as Leo nibbles on my edges.  Involuntarily, I bite
down on Chuck's nipple and let out a sharp gasp.

"Can we fuck you?" Leo asks, breathing heavily into my crack on a short
reprieve.

"Yes" I sigh, and almost instantly I hear the sound of a foil wrapper
behind me.

Because I have never been fucked before, I throw myself back onto Chuck's
cock to distract myself.  Behind me, Leo presses his fingers into my hole
and lubes up my crack, balls and cock.  I'm shocked at how loose and ready
I seem, but I don't say anything -- I just keep working on the cock in my
mouth.

Just before impact, I feel Leo kneel behind me, lining up his huge cock
with my waiting hole.  He presses against me, hot and ready and insistent.

"Push it in" Chuck says, above me.

Leo pushes in, clearing his cockhead.  My ass explodes in pain, and I
choke.  I push up, with my instincts screaming to get away, and Leo holds
me still.  With one arm around my waist, and one arm over my chest, he
breathes into my ear, "Relax.  I'll wait for you."

I am breathing quickly, short, pained breaths, and my balls hold tight,
pulled back into my body.

As the pain subsides and I try to relax, I lean back into Leo's hairy
chest.  Chuck, in front of me, looks a bit concerned, but he is also
stroking his cock.

Deciding I can do this, I try to ease down further onto Leo's cock.  He
throbs, and stabs further into me.  "Oh, oh, oh" I say in pain as my breath
quickens again.

"Let's lay him down on his back" Chuck suggests.  I nod, and silently, Leo
picks me up with his strong arms and repositions me on the bed.  With my
knees around his shoulders, he gently pushes into me, while I stare up into
his face.  He is incredibly gentle, and slowly, ever so slowly, I relax.
It seems incredibly intimate, and I think of Markie.

"Are you ready?" Leo asks me, without breaking the stare.

I nod, and Leo gets ready for the big push.

"Good" Chuck says, and pushes his cock in my face to distract me.

Soon, I'm bouncing on Leo's hips, with a pillow behind me.  My cock is
getting hard again, and noticing this, Leo grabs ahold of it and starts
jacking.  The sensation inside of me is incredible, and it feels like Leo
is fucking hard enough to fill my cock with his own.  I can barely keep my
breath, and can only muster a few licks at Chuck's cock.  Sitting on his
heels, he takes over, jacking hard, and stopping every few strokes to push
into my face again.

"You are such a hot fuck" Leo tells me, pulling on my hips for emphasis.  I
put my arms down on the bed to brace myself, as I'm barraged at both ends.

"This is my first time" I tell him.

"Oh, fuck!" Chuck tells me, and grabs my head to shove his dick down my
throat.

I can't breath, but Chuck doesn't stop.  He fucks hard, mashing against the
inside of my cheek, my tongue, down my throat. I breathe through my nose,
and I can see him pinching and squeezing his nipples.

"Eat my cum, Caleb" He tells me, thrusting even harder.  Pulling out, he
pops out of my mouth, and despite his attempt to get back in, he begins
spurting up over my face.  His dick jerks one, two... three times before
weakening and his semen starts spilling onto my face.  My asshole is
singing, and I feel an orgasm coming from the inside.  I shoot onto Leo's
hand, onto my chest, onto the bed, all over.  I contract on his cock each
time, and I can feel every detail.

After one more deep thrust, Leo pulls out of me, peels the condom off, and
makes full strokes up and down his cock.

"I can't get off with condoms" he says, arching his back and leaning his
groin over me.  I grab onto his balls, and he gasps.

"Fuck, I'm coming." He says, then starts spewing a thick, unending rope
onto my chest, my face, and down my abs.

"Fuck, that was hot" I say, gasping for air.  Leo strokes slowly, finally
milking the last of his sperm.

"I'll get a towel" he says.

I wake up the next morning with a splitting headache, a sore asshole, and
the spins.  Leo and Chuck are asleep, wrapped around each other.  I slowly
pull on my clothes, looking around for any misplaced items.  I can barely
think straight.

I head down into the living area, and only a few guys are awake.  The
couches and the floor are littered with beer cans and sleeping guys.  As I
make my way to the kitchen for some water, I see Markie sitting at the
breakfast bar, sipping some coffee.  One look tells me he's got it as bad
as I do, and I whisper to him "Are you ok?"

"Yeah" He croaks "Do you want to go home early?"

I nod, ready to get out of this place.  The sex with Leo and Chuck was
amazing, but I need to get some fresh air.  I want to get Markie out of
here as quickly as possible, and try to salvage our friendship from his
regrettable evening.

As we drive home, despite the general cloud of hangover, I notice Markie is
surprisingly ok.  His shoulders are down, and his disposition is relaxed as
he changes the station, as changes lanes.  For a full half hour, neither of
us say anything.  I'm starting to feel as confused as I did the night
before.  Markie breaks the silence "Are you ok, Caleb? You're awfully
quiet."

I hesitate, wondering if he at all remembers what happened.  I consider
just pretending like it didn't happen, like everything is normal, like I
didn't see my best (straight!) friend fuck a guy I hate.

"What happened with you and Benjamin last night?"

"Oh that?" He laughs, looking at me as if relieved.  "We just made out."

"But you went to bed with him.  You didn't do anything?"

"Nope, just went to bed."

"Oh." I say.  Maybe he used Benjamin as a cover to get the other guys off
of his back, to stop the questions, to get some cred with the gays.  But
why would he have come on this trip anyway?  Why did he kiss him?  I saw
that look between them.  He was so drunk, he would have fucked anything.
Why wasn't it me?  Why doesn't he act that way with me?

"Lets just get home" I say, turning up the music "I want to go back to
bed."

--
Mark Hankering
October 24, 2010