This chapter brings Laramie into the Jackson Bend setting of the previous books.

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As a reminder, the last chapter took place in November 2015.

 

7

 

March 2016
Laramie Jenkins (27)
Freddy Spaulding (28)

 

Laramie

I hadn't been able to spend a lot of time with Joshua, but he seemed to be quite a nice guy. He and Freddy seemed to connect really well. I could see the love between them. As they joined hands on stage and took their vows, I actually felt good. I would always love Freddy, but we moved on years ago. This was what was good for him. I wanted him to be happy.

It was my first same-sex wedding. I realized I had been to less than five weddings in my entire life. I found this nice. It was what I would term "modern." I wasn't expecting a flower girl and such typical customs churned out in the name of tradition. This still had a formality to it, but the music, the décor, the ceremony — it was beautiful but still unique.

Their kiss was longer than I expected. Not garish but still lasting beyond a simple moment. I loved how everyone cheered. Not a single person cared that it was two men kissing. I embraced that reality. I relished seeing acceptance from every attendee. I momentarily thought of my father and what his expression would be had he attended such an occasion. Ugh. I blotted thoughts of him out of my mind.

Their event was to not be an all-night affair. There was a reception but no band or dancing. The food was fantastic. I liked how it was all placed in stations with two of them having chefs to customize your choices of pasta dishes and tossed salads. It wasn't a sit-down dinner, which I somewhat appreciated. I knew zero people other than the happy couple. I wasn't sure how good I would have been at small talk, particularly since I was an earlier lover of Freddy's.

There were several tables at which one could sit. I chose the standing tall cocktail-type tables. One person had shared it with me, but he moved on to get a drink from the bar. I imagined he hoped to escape to someone who was better at conversation than I had been.

As I slurped down my last noodle, I saw Freddy and Joshua walk up to me.

"Ah! The happy couple! I finally get to congratulate you properly."

"Thank you. It's been a little nutty the last hour," Freddy said.

"It was a beautiful ceremony. I hope the two of you could actually enjoy it."

They looked at each other.

"I think we did," Josh said. "You plan it for so long that once it actually happens, it just ... seems like you've been through it before."

"Well, it is official. So, congratulations."

"It was nice of you to join us here in Boston, particularly on your birthday weekend — and you're about to move," Freddy said.

"Finally."

"So tell me about this new town."

"Jackson Bend.

"What state?"

"Oh, it's..."

"Excuse us. Could we borrow the happy couple for just one picture?" A couple of friends dragged them away for a moment.

And then I felt alone again.

They returned three minutes later.

"So ... Jackson Bend. You like it?" Freddy asked.

"I do. I have visited it twice. I liked it after the first visit, then I found a place to work where I think I'll actually like what I do."

"Which is?" Josh asked.

"Woodworking. It's a furniture/cabinetry place."

"So not everyone goes to Home Depot?"

I laughed. "It's more custom stuff. People who have specific measurement, particular visions in mind."

"Perfect for you," Freddy said.

"Indeed. It is an established place. Nice clientele. The owner had been looking for someone to take on the job of assistant manager. He's in his young 60s. I think he is looking at a retirement exit in the future."

As we talked for a few more minutes, I found myself enjoying being with gay people. That so rarely happened for me. It was typically a one-on-one situation to where I was sucking or fucking someone. It was nice just to be among ... friends. Gay friends. I hoped Jackson Bend would allow me to do that.

Eventually they were drawn away for the cake to be cut. I watched them. They looked so happy. As much as I would always long for us to be like we were, I was genuinely happy for Freddy. I knew deep down this is what I was hoping to find. I wasn't sure if I was the marrying type, but I definitely wanted to fall in love. Again. One day.

Much to my surprise, I saw them walking back to me several minutes later with a slice of cake for me.

"We know you don't know anybody, so we thought we'd join you a few more minutes," Freddy said.

"Why, thanks. Joshua, I have really enjoyed getting to know you. You seem to make Freddy very happy. I'm so thrilled for both of you."

"He talks about you all the time," Joshua said.

"All the more reason I should thank you, considering we were college flames. But ... Boston was a much better fit for Freddy than Kansas would ever be."

"Indeed," said Freddy. "However, we've been going back and forth to New York for three months now. We expect to be fully moved by the beginning of June. It was nice just to take care of the wedding before all that."

The three of us were brought champagne. We offered "cheers" and took a drink.

"Thank you again for offering me the guest room. I'm sure you had so many potential guests."

"Most of our friends are here in Boston. My parents insisted on a hotel — thank God — and you are exactly the type of person that should be in a guest room. We hope it won't be the last time you come see us."

"One day, I promise to do Boston properly. Or New York."

"Exactly. I'm grateful that you don't mind going to the airport early in the morning. Our flight to Hawaii is pretty early."

"I only have to sit there a couple of hours. No problem. I appreciate the ride — and hospitality."

 

Freddy

It was slightly awkward to have my college love here, but Josh knew the two of us were deep friends. I am relieved the two of them hit it off. Someone from Kansas isn't necessarily easy to click with for someone who grew up in New York. Josh and Larry were great.

I felt the buzz hit me about 10:30. I realized I had enough wine and champagne for one day. Josh had stopped around 9:00, but Lar' and I just kept going.

It was funny that when Larry asked Josh about his early boyfriends and growing up in an accepting environment that I realized I hadn't heard most of my husband's stories.

My husband. How awesome was that.

We were going to love just relaxing in Hawaii. I wish we could do it nude on a beach. Hawaii would feel glorious. I was quite ready to leave winter behind. It was technically spring, but winter sure seemed to have a grasp on the temperatures.

We finally decided to go to bed seeing that we would only be getting a few hours of sleep.

Larry told us "Good night" and retired to the guest room.

After Josh and I brushed our teeth, we entered the bedroom and pulled back the sheet. Contrary to Josh's usual routine, he stripped completely nude. His dick was sticking out at full length. I smiled at him.

"It is our wedding night, after all," he informed.

"Indeed. Who needs sleep? We'll nap on the plane."

For a few minutes, two naked bodies intertwined groping, grinding, slobbering.

"I'm so glad I'm not too drunk that I can't get hard," I giggled.

"Oh no. I can feel you are quite erect, my dear husband," Josh said.

My man went down on me and swallowed my six-plus inches in one slurp. My cock felt so wet. He lubricated each molecule of skin with his Colgate-minty saliva. I was so buzzed I allowed myself to moan a bit, even though we had a guest here.

He serviced me orally for several minutes. I ran my fingers through his hair and my fingernails scratched his back.

"I love you so much, Josh."

He grunted into my erection. I knew he said it back.

"Swing around. I need to feel your cock," I instructed.

Josh moved his body on the bed without taking his mouth from my engorged organ. I reached for his hard-on and started stroking it. That made my pleasure even more enhanced.

He sucked me vigorously. I stroked him with a fierceness that acted in contrast with the beauty of our day. For just a second, I remembered jerking Larry's cock just like that in college. I continued pounding harder. Joshua was the love of my life, but I never stopped picturing Lar's anatomy from time to time. That wasn't appropriate. I forced it from my thoughts.

"Josh," I panted. "Oh, Josh. I love you so much."

My buzz was making me silly. I moaned too loudly. To my surprise, I felt Josh spray cum all over the two of us. Did he come quickly? Or was I partially intoxicated to where it was taking me longer? I couldn't tell. He just moaned into my cock as he experienced a long orgasm.

 

Laramie

I was trying to fall asleep quickly with our early flight. Between my joy of being in the middle of the beautiful day and the amount of alcohol I had consumed, I figured I would drift away easily.

I thought I heard one of them groan. Of course, it was their wedding night. It made me reach for my own dick. I reached under the waistband of my boxers and fondled my penis. I felt it stiffen.

After a couple of minutes, I recognized the moan of Freddy coming. It wasn't loud, but it was audible enough for me to detect from the guest room. He was probably just drunk enough to not care if I could hear or not.

If I hadn't been hard before, hearing him come made my dick a crowbar. I loved thinking of him coming, his big cock, his crotch, his scent, his bush, his balls, his ass ... I missed him. Still.

I rolled to the side of the bed to reach down for a sock.

I jerked my cock thinking about him. It seemed wrong now that he was married, but I was a little drunk. It was just fantasy. People always fantasized when they masturbated. We never fucked in college. I wondered if they did now. I pictured fucking him.

My dick was electric. I mauled it like a wolf stimulating it even further. My gyrating grip was tight.

I pictured fucking him.

I pummeled my hard flesh. My fingers pulsed as I yanked on my erection. My breathing was heavier. It eventually became ragged. It was like I was gasping for oxygen. I was naked. They were naked. The world was naked.

I envisioned fucking him.

I panted in quick breaths. My cock was throbbing. My climax had started to build. I knew my balls were close to releasing my pent-up testosterone.

I imagined fucking him.

Fucking him.

Fucking him.

I wrapped the sock over my erection and made the final jerks to cause me to come. I had no idea how much was inside the footwear. My hips just kept thrusting. I took a deep breath. The orgasm was ... fine. I had come, but ... it wasn't great. I didn't know if it was because of the alcohol or if I knew he was legally off-limits. Either way, it didn't bother me. It was sexual release.

 

—

 

The alarm on my phone went off. I figured I had about five hours of sleep. If that.

I quickly scrambled to the bathroom to hop in the shower. I couldn't dawdle. I still had to make sure everything was in the suit bag. I was groggy. I was confident the lack of sleep and no lack of alcohol was not a beneficial combination.

Thirty minutes later we were sharing an Uber. I had never done that. I never had a reason to do that. We arrived at Logan just before 6:30.

As my flight was two hours later, I sat with Freddy and Joshua at their gate.

"Do you fly much?" I asked.

"I suppose," Freddy said. "We do a few trips a year. We've done international travel twice. I highly recommend Global Entry. It makes it so much faster."

"I don't see me traveling overseas."

"Canada is easy. We sometimes just go for a couple of days."

I felt awkward and out of place. I'd flown three times in my entire life. It wasn't in our family's budget. Now that I was moving to a new town, my finances would change entirely. Coming back to Boston (or if they moved to New York) to let them show me the city would be a big splurge. But I was committed to it.

We made small talk. Eventually, passengers started to pre-board. We rustled to gather our things. Freddy promised to text a picture every day. I told him I looked forward to seeing them.

I had been happy during the entire visit, but now I didn't feel that way. What had happened? I was still delighted for the two of them. I accepted that. Maybe it was that I worried I would never find such love. Maybe it was my return meant I would pack up and move and all that was scary. Maybe being surrounded by gay people made me feel less alone and I knew that would all come to an end.

Maybe.

Maybe Jackson Bend would be better.

Their group number was called. We gave hugs all around. Josh and I once again said it was nice to finally meet.

"Love you, Larry bear," Freddy said, kissing me on the cheek.

"Love you too." I kissed his cheek and they walked away. "Freddy bear."

The terminal looked busy and abuzz with people darting here and there. I felt alone.

 

Early April 2016
Laramie Jenkins (27)
Grayson Jenkins (24)

 

Laramie

Grayson had put one more box in his car — somehow — and slammed the back passenger door. I was so glad he was helping me move. I looked at the U-Haul. It appeared small to me. Was everything I owned in that thing? We were clever with loading furniture, but I could tell I was going to have to acquire a lot when I arrived. Everything in our cars basically went into my bedroom and bath. I was going to have to get stuff for the kitchen and the living room.

"How did you do this, Gray?"

"What do you mean?"

"I feel as if I have less than half of a house, but I'm putting down the deposit and buying a house."

"I'm in an apartment, remember?"

"Right," I sighed.

I knew my savings would help get a few more things once I was there. With my skills, I was hoping to actually build things where I worked. Hopefully the owner would allow me to.

"I guess it's time to say goodbye to the folks," I said.

"Yep." Grayson grabbed me by the wrist. "Look at me. It all seems sort of scary now, but ... this is going to be good for you. So good. You're going to love being on your own."

"I ... I think so."

The two of us walked inside. Mom and Dad stood waiting in the living room.

"Well, I guess this is it. I suppose we should head out. We have several hours of driving."

Mom hugged Grayson. "You boys drive careful, now."

She then hugged me. It was nice enough. I was pleased to at least receive that. It seemed more like a hug I received when going on a trip, not like one you might expect when you were going away forever. I gave her a tighter squeeze.

Dad reached out to shake my hand. I did so.

"Be careful," he said. It was the emotional depth that he was able to produce.

"I'll call when we get there."

Mom walked to the kitchen and handed each of us a paper sack. "Snacks for the road."

My brother and I thanked her and headed out the front door. My parents stood on the front porch and gave a simple wave as the two of us got into our cars.

My brother and I rolled down our windows.

"If I haven't told you how much I appreciate you coming with me, please know I really do," I told Grayson.

"You have. And I'm glad to do it."

 

Grayson

I was happy for Lar'. Moving is a bit scary, but I knew he was going to be happier on his own. I didn't have a problem with him being gay. I sincerely wanted him to find someone.

I wondered if Phillip had an issue with it. Phillip was such a mystery. None of us got the sense of anything being wrong, but clearly, we overlooked something. If only he had talked with us, shared with us, perhaps the family wouldn't feel so pulled apart.

We had driven two hours before pulling over for our first stop. It was good that we were in our separate cars. Laramie could listen to his country-and-western junk. I had several CDs of my rock-and-roll favorites.

I sang along to "Animals" by Maroon Five. Their latest album had grown on me. "Sugar" came on and I thought about Larry again. I hoped he would find "sweetness in his life."

Getting out of Eureka was great for me. Granted, I wasn't that far from home, but just being on my own was liberating. For someone who has contended with what he has gone through, Jackson Bend should be incredible for my brother.

We wanted us to keep good time, so Kentucky Fried Chicken would have to make do for lunch. Larry opted for spicy chicken. I wasn't sure where he acquired that taste. Mom certainly didn't make things very spicy. I liked the Colonel's original herbs and spices.

"How do you feel?" I asked Larry.

"What do you mean?"

"You've officially left home. How does it feel?"

"It doesn't. We aren't there yet. I don't think I will feel anything until I'm sitting in my house."

"How did you do all the paperwork from Jackson Bend?"

"I actually did a lot of it when I was there last month. The beginnings of it all. I've mailed several things the last two weeks. Some was done online if it didn't need my signature. It wasn't that bad really. My keys arrived by certified mail last Tuesday."

"Sweet."

"I guess. Don't expect a mansion or anything. It's not a brand-new house or anything. I can afford what I can afford."

"At least it's a house."

 

—

 

Many hours later, after one gasoline stop and a bathroom stop, we pulled into a driveway. I didn't know what to make of the house. There was enough light from the setting sun for me to get a general sense of it all. Laramie's house was a single-story ranch, I guessed it was built around the 1970s, but I didn't really know for sure.

He pulled keys out of a small manila envelope. The temperature was about 20 degrees cooler than when we had stopped for lunch. We decided to leave everything in the U-Haul until the morning. For fifteen minutes we carried boxes inside from both our cars. It was decided to stack them all in the corner of the living room.

"Sure you don't want to go get a hotel room?" Larry asked me.

"Nah. Why waste the money? I'm okay with a sleeping bag on the floor for one night."

"I am so, so, so grateful that you came along with me. Thank you, Gray."

"No prob. Being several hours away, I won't get to see you as often."

"Yeah." My brother paused. "That is the downside. Mom and Dad ... I don't think any of us care, but you ..."

"Of course, they care."

"Dunno," Larry muttered. "Maybe." He opened a box labeled "Bathroom" and pulled out rolls of toilet paper. "Maybe not," he mumbled as he walked off to place a roll in each bathroom.

He remembered a Target in town, so we took my car to pick up some household essentials. After that, we went to a restaurant called McGee's. It had a mix of college kids and a few families.

"I like this place," I said.

"Yeah, me too. I found it on my last visit."

Our server sat down our meals. My cheeseburger looked sensational. I could tell the fries had some special seasoning on them. I looked at Larry's sandwich. It had a fried egg and jalapenos on it. He dashed some tabasco on it before taking his first bite.

"Trying to use up all the toilet paper you packed tonight?" I said with notable snark.

"Bite me."

We loved the food. There was something about simply eating at a cool place that made me feel better about him being here. Before heading back tomorrow, I hoped to see a little of the town.

We put away things we had purchased at Target. A stop into a grocery store following dinner let him stock up on a few staples. Items that needed to be refrigerated were suitably placed.

"How is there a fridge here?" I asked.

"Previous owners didn't want it," he said. "Kind of a freebie for me."

"Nice. I guess. Looks a bit ancient."

"It will serve its purpose for now. Hopefully for a year or two at least so I can finish furnishing the place."

"Or start furnishing the place. You'll need a lot," I said, trying not to sound mean.

"True," he said staring at the black hole of emptiness in the house. I wondered what was going through his head.

He took two beers out of the fridge. He had turned on the ice maker before we left for Jake's. I saw him peer into the ice bin to see if any had been made. We didn't need it for the beer though.

He turned on a lamp in the living room. It was just sitting on the floor.

We took a few minutes to sort through the boxes and place them in the appropriate rooms. I found I hated the colors in each one. A few were plain white, which was okay. The master bedroom and the bathroom had been painted, and I felt the colors were outdated. The kitchen had wallpaper which was hideous in my opinion. The place was by no means a "fixer upper," but it still needed some aesthetic help.

We pulled the sleeping bags out.

"Want your own room?" he said with amusement.

I laughed. "Oh. I don't know. Both of us here in the living room kind of reminds me of our days when we were kids. Remember camping out by the lake?"

"Yeah. The three of us."

I could tell by Laramie's expression that he started thinking about Phillip, just like I had done. There were six years difference between Phillip and me. I still missed him. More than anything I knew I wouldn't ever see him again. That was the weirdest part.

"What do you miss about Phillip?" I asked.

My brother sat quietly. He didn't ignore my question; I could tell he was pondering his answer.

"Even though he treated me like a little kid sometimes, particularly when I was in grade school, I still liked our time together. When he left home, I still looked forward to him coming home. When I stayed back to help look after Mom, he treated me really nicely. And ... when I came out ... well, when he caught me with Charlie ..."

"Ugh."

"... he didn't make fun of me or push me away. We didn't really talk about it much, but I felt he was fairly okay with it. I think he knew Dad wouldn't be, so ... I don't know, I felt he was in my corner."

"Really."

"Yeah. I guess I just miss talking to him. We had our best talks when we were both preoccupied with something. Carving, stacking bales of hay, riding in the car."

"I can't really remember any personal memories of just him and me. It always seemed to be the three of us."

"The age difference I guess."

Larry rummaged through the "Bathroom" box again and found toothpaste and a toothbrush. He walked into the bathroom off the hall. He didn't shut the door — just like growing up — and I could hear him pee. Water from the sink ran, and I could hear him brushing his teeth.

I ruffled through my bag to find my overnight kit.

Laramie emerged from the bedroom with a pair of shorts. He pulled off his jeans and threw them to an empty side of the room. He tugged on each sock to free them from his feet. I was slightly bemused by the way he pulled his T-shirt over his head. He gripped the shoulders to lift it up. I typically grabbed the bottom of the shirt. Or that was what I thought. I had never really consciously given it a moment's notice. He pulled his briefs off and reached for the shorts. I hadn't seen his dick in several years. I was no connoisseur, but I felt he had the best dick of the three of us. Or from what I remembered. Ironically, that was one conversation I remembered having with Phillip. He hated that Laramie's dick was bigger than either of ours. As strange as that memory was, I still recalled it. I just couldn't remember why the conversation ever took place.

I went to brush my teeth.

I could hear my brother talking to my parents. He let them know we had arrived safely. They talked maybe one minute.

 

—

 

Laramie

I looked at Grayson. He always slept the deepest of us three boys. The coffee was almost done brewing. I didn't feel the need to wake him. Yet. Maybe it was the aroma of coffee, but he began stirring a few minutes later.

A McDonalds was only four blocks away, so I zipped over to get us some Egg McMuffins. I hated that we had to sit on the floor, but we made do.

The two of us spent the morning getting everything out of the U-Haul and both cars. At that point, it was clutter, but at least the house didn't look vastly empty.

Watching Gray, I thought he was a fine-looking man. Brothers never really think in that way, but he had grown into a great man, not just physically but also kind. He was truly a good person. I was proud he was my brother. I would miss him.

"I'm not sure when you will make the drive back, but hopefully the house will be pretty much put together the next time you come," I said.

"I'm not sure. I mean, I'll miss you, for sure, but it is enough of a drive, I can't imagine it doing more than a couple of times a year. We'll see." He paused. "At least you will come home for Thanksgiving and Christmas and whatnot."

I didn't respond. Would I? Of course I would love to see Gray often, but I wasn't so sure about Mom and Dad. I wasn't feeling it. As scary as it was feeling like I was on my own, I did feel a slight ... relief. It wasn't that I wanted to be away from them, but it kind of felt okay to not be around them. I kind of realized that I felt a freedom to be myself. I didn't expect to find anyone right away, but if I did ... then ... I could just be me. Gay me.

"We'll see. One or the other. Maybe."

"Maybe nothing! You have to come home for Christmas."

"Who knows? It could possibly be a busy time at work, and I may not be able to."

That was an excuse I made up. It could very well be true, but nothing in my body wanted to go back home. I had been in Jackson Bend one day and already I felt like I would never return to Eureka. That very notion seemed so ridiculous — never going back to see your parents — but every brain cell, hair follicle, blood vessel and toenail in my body felt that way. I wasn't sure how it happened, but there was something there that was completely severed.

 

Grayson

Laramie looked preoccupied. I couldn't fathom him not coming home for Christmas. By that time, I knew he would miss us all. If he didn't come, that would be really hard. To not have either brother would be too much, at least at Christmas.

If I got married one day, those distances might begin to happen, but it was too soon right now. It started sinking in that I would only see my brother on rare occasions. I'm not sure what was happening between him and Mom and Dad, but I got the clear impression that if I wanted to see Laramie, I was going to have to come here; he wasn't coming back to Kansas.

Twenty minutes later, we had the bed set up. Laramie had two pieces of furniture in his bedroom: a dresser and a bed. At least his clothes had been put away. They were either in drawers or hanging in the closet. He brought in another lamp that had been sitting in the corner of the living room. I realized his nightstand counted as another piece. Nothing was on the wall. It still seemed rather bare.

I helped him make the bed. That made it look a little better.

The second bedroom was completely empty.

"Think you will eventually make this into a guest room?" I asked.

"M'not sure." Larry looked it at blankly. "I don't know what guests I might have. But, yeah, I should. I'd like you to have more than a couch when you come visit. Freddy and Joshua may visit one day. It's probably a lot of work for something not really necessary, but I guess I should."

He had a card table set up in the small bedroom. His laptop was on it; he had it plugged in and charging. It was obvious this would be an office space.

"Until I get another bedroom set, that `guest room' might be sort of an art studio."

"Art studio?" I followed.

"I like to carve. It relaxes me. Sort of an outlet I guess."

"You could paint these walls too ... before you get too much stuff put in place."

"Think so?"

"Oh yeah. The colors are kind of dreadful."

"Swell. Thanks a lot."

"Hey, it's an opportunity to really make it your own place, you know?"

Larry walked through the house analyzing each room. He didn't really make any comments, but I could tell by his eyes that he was judging each color.

I walked up behind him and put my hands on his shoulders. "I hate to say this, but it's a long drive. I should get on the road."

He turned around. "Yeah." His arms wrapped around me. We hardly ever hugged, but I had come to learn that my brother was a good hugger. I squeezed him tighter. He squeezed back. "I appreciate you, Gray. You have no idea."

 

Laramie

I watched Gray pull out of the driveway and gave one final wave.

I opened one of the folding chairs from the card table set and placed it in the middle of the living room. The empty living room. The chasmic void of the living room.

There were a few boxes of items along the wall, but most of the boxes had been broken down and stacked in the garage.

I needed stuff. So much stuff.

It was Sunday afternoon. I hoped Freddy and Josh would be home.

Freddy picked up.

"Hey! How's it going?" I started.

"Good! Good! How are you?"

"Okay, I guess. I'm here. Jackson Bend is now home."

"Wow. So ... what do you think?"

"I think I need a million things for me to fill this house."

Freddy laughed. "Is it big?"

"Not really. No. I just didn't bring much with me from Eureka."

"For now, get what you need. Everything else comes in time."

"I guess. I'm hoping I can build my own kitchen table and chairs at work."

"That's handy."

"Obviously, I will have to buy the materials, but my boss has some great tools and equipment. I'm looking forward to it."

"Well, that's good."

"Enough about a blank house, tell me about the honeymoon."

Freddy described Hawaii in detail for me. It sounded exotic. I doubted I would ever get there. I felt that was okay. I didn't have to see the entire world. I was ready to find my place in Jackson Bend. I was happy that the two of them had a great time. He handed the phone to Josh for a minute. One thing about no matter where you lived, friends were always at the other end of the phone.

 

—

 

Before heading back to Target, I noticed a thrift store two blocks away. I walked in not really keen on the idea of getting used stuff. But seeing that I had nothing, second-hand furniture might get me by. At least for a few months. As a homeowner, I would have so many more bills now.

There was a couch and a matching chair. The chair looked like it had a small coffee stain that had been tried to be cleaned. The couch looked pretty good. I had no real friends in town, so who would judge me? The price was a bargain in my eyes, so I asked if I could purchase it but pick it up later this week. The store owner agreed. I assumed someone at work might have a pick-up truck since we were working with wood and furniture at the store. Maybe they would have compassion on me and help me get it home.

I had to start work in the morning, so I tried to relax enough to get some sleep. I plugged in my phone to charge overnight. Before turning out the light, I sent a text to Gray.

"You probably aren't home yet, but hopefully the drive went smooth. Thank you again. Really."

I stared at my message. I added another text.

"As brothers we don't really say this. I hope it's okay. Just wanted to say I love you and wanted you to know that."

I went to bed.

 

—

 

The next morning, I saw Gray's response had come in at 11:21.

"Of course, it's okay. I love you too. Have a great first week."

 

 

April 4, 2016
Laramie Jenkins (27)
Kenton Shuppe (62)

 

Laramie

I had met Mr. Shuppe last month. He seemed very pleased to see me. I was ten minutes early, so I was there when he pulled in to unlock the door.

"How was your move?" he asked.

Mr. Shuppe was six-foot-one. His salt-and-pepper goatee matched his full head of hair. Because of the nature of our business — lifting, carrying, working with your hands — he was in pretty good shape. For someone more than twice my age, I thought he was handsome enough. Hopefully I would fare as well as I aged. He had nice arms. I always found that attractive.

"I suppose it will still be a work in progress for a while," I chuckled.

"That's usually how it goes. For a young man like you, you have plenty of time to accumulate all the garbage no one really needs."

I laughed at his joke.

We walked around the shop. There wasn't a whole lot "up front." There were a few examples of the types of wood we carried, as well as various decorative edges. A large credenza held simple items and forms next to the front door. It was a beautiful piece of work. Other than that, the front area was a bit plain. Gray would have approved of the olive green the walls were painted. The two fake plants paired well with the color. A fern hung near the window, which seemed to be healthy. A single painting of a landscape didn't do much for me, but the frame was wonderful craftsmanship. I asked if he had done it, and Mr. Shuppe told me he had.

Most of Shuppe's Mantle was consumed by the back area. Stacks and stacks of wood. Saws and other power tools. He had some tools I immediately recognized and others that he had to explain. I looked forward to learning how to use them.

In honor of my first day, he ordered pizza in for the staff. I enjoyed getting to know my coworkers. It was not a lot of employees. Work had picked up, so there was a clear need for my skills. Maria was the receptionist. I was told that she brought homemade tamales on the first Friday of every month, so never bring my lunch on that day. She was the wife of Julio Lopez, who worked with me in the back. She spoke perfect English, as if she were a schoolteacher. Julio did well, but you could tell it was a second language. I watched him work several of the machines. I could tell I could learn much from him. I found Julio amazingly handsome. I got the impression that he showered when he got home and that while at work, he didn't care if his hair was ruffled or not. He did a lot while I was being shown the ropes. At one point he worked up a sweat, and I found him sensually hot. Knowing his wife was up front, I knew there would never be any sexual tension in that regard. Amos was also handsome, but in a different way. He was like someone who you would watch football with and somehow start making out once you both were drunk. His sandy hair and sideburns matched the chest hair sticking out of his collar. I could tell he had a furry chest. I knew there would likely never be a situation where I could see him shirtless, but I pondered it.

Mr. Shuppe showed me how the orders were taken and the process of each project moving from person to person. I was loving it. I was a bit scared that the more experienced guys would think me a rookie. I was in most ways, but Mr. Schuppe had confidence in me. It was my management skills that helped me get the job.

At five, most everyone left. It seemed so different than a big supply store like Home Depot or Lowes. But Shuppe's Mantle catered to special orders. It was custom service and apparently people were willing to pay for exactly what they wanted.

I asked Mr. Shuppe if I could stay a little later and experiment with the machines and tools with which I wasn't familiar. He pointed to a box of scrap wood that I could explore however I wanted. For thirty minutes he demonstrated some techniques. I picked up on them quickly. I enjoyed learning new skills. I found him friendly, and I was glad that I had a boss that I was going to enjoy working under.

"So, Larry, do you have any family in this area?"

"Naw. Everyone's back in Kansas."

"Did you leave a girlfriend there?"

Damn. I didn't want to have to deal with any questions like this. I think my pause gave Mr. Shuppe an awkward feeling that he had stepped into emotional poop with his question.

"No sir, no girlfriend back home."

"Lots of women in Jackson Bend. If you're looking, you'll be able to find someone."

"Right now, I just want to concentrate on work and the house."

 

Kenton

I knew my question had thrown Larry. I figured he and a recent girlfriend had gone through a bad breakup. His demeanor really changed with that question.

"So, do you like your house?"

"It's fine. For now. I need a lot. I was hoping to ask you if I was willing to pay for the wood and materials if I could stay late after work and build my home some shelving and furniture."

"We might have some extra wood now that I can give you."

"No, Mr. Shuppe. I'd prefer to make sure I pay for everything."

"Please, call me Kenton. Better yet, Kent."

"Oh, thank you. I noticed Amos did."

"Julio is pretty quiet. No matter how hard I try, he always calls me Mr. Shuppe."

We both chuckled.

"Relocating is hard," I said. "If you ever need anything or have questions about the town or ... whatever, don't hesitate to ask. I want you to be happy here. Jackson Bend is a great place to live. In my opinion at least. I have been here for the last 40 years. It has a lot of heart."

"Thank you, sir, ... er, Kent."

Larry was great with his hands. Although I knew he still had a lot to learn, he was going to pick it up easily.

"Mr. Sh- ... Kent. There is a block of wood here." Larry held up a small piece of wood. "Might I take it home?"

"That's fairly small. What would you do with it?"

"I carve. It is a hobby. I guess."

"Really? Did you bring any of your work with you?"

"No, sir. It's all back in Kansas. Just before leaving, I left a sculpture in my bedroom. Sort of a remembrance of me. My mother liked cats. We had a couple growing up. A few years ago, she got very sick. It was serious for a while." He looked up at me. "But she's good now. Better at least. I ... I wouldn't have left otherwise."

I got the impression he had to defend his decision for leaving. I nodded to let him know I understood.

"Anyway, I had carved a cat for her. Kind of modern looking, I guess."

"I'm sure they loved it," I said.

Larry was blank. "I don't know," he mumbled. "I called them Saturday night to let them know my brother and I arrived safely. They didn't mention it."

That was sad. I was gathering more from what Larry was not saying more than what he was. He seemed like a good kid. Polite, hardworking, talented. I got the impression that Jackson Bend was a fresh start.

"What would you like to carve next?"

"To be honest, I'm not sure. Nothing is inspiring me at the moment."

"What are you looking for in Jackson Bend?"

"Me. I guess," he said, looking down at the wood.

Larry stood up and went over to a lathe to piddle with a scrap. I couldn't make heads or tails of what he was implying. He just looked a little lonely and like someone who didn't have a great rapport with family.

"How many brothers and sisters do you have?"

"One brother," he said. Then he paused. His expression was pained. "Actually, I had a second brother."

"Oh."

"He, uh ... he ... he took his life a few years back."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Larry. Really. I'm sure that was a shock."

"It was. None of us were really sure why. I guess we'll never know."

I didn't know what to say. What was the proper response to a family suicide? I wanted to make sure Larry felt safe here. Comfortable.

"Jackson Bend will be a fresh start. I hope you like the job. I hope you like the town. It's really a great community. You could meet someone. Who knows, maybe start a family."

He turned away.

"Maybe," he barely said.

His stomach rumbled and we had the giggles for a moment.

"Can I buy you dinner, son?"

He laughed. "You bought me lunch. I couldn't ask that."

"Think of it as a welcome to Jackson Bend from your boss."

 

Laramie

Kent seemed almost fatherly. I appreciated his interest in me. He was so nice. Sadly, I felt like I had so much to hold back. He was different than Dad. I didn't get a judgmental vibe from him at all. However, he didn't know that I was gay. Would he feel different then?

"Do you like Chinese?" he asked.

"I didn't get a lot in Eureka," I chuckled. "But yeah. Sure."

"I'll call my wife, Sharon, to see if she wants to join us. I'd like you to meet her."

He stepped away to call his wife. I wrestled with feelings like I should probably be doing things around the house. But like what? I had nothing to work with really.

"She's tied up but encouraged the two of us to go out."

Twenty minutes later we were at Great Wall. Kent ordered Orange Chicken. I selected Kung Pao Chicken.

"You know not to eat those red things, right?" he said.

"Right. I do like spicy stuff though."

"You're a bigger man than me."

"My family wasn't into spicy much either."

We made simple chit chat until our food arrived. Wood. Mulch. Wallpaper. The courthouse. Jalapenos. The college campus.

Our food arrived. We both loved our entrees.

"I want you to feel at home here, Larry. Our store is sort of a second family. I hope you will come to think of it that way."

"Everyone seemed nice."

"They are. We look out for each other. Two more guys come in on Saturday and Sunday. We aren't open on Sunday, but they stack a lot of deliveries when we aren't working. Amos works Saturday too but takes Wednesdays off usually. Sometimes it varies with the orders that come in. Casey is off this week. He'll be back next week. I'll introduce you to him."

"Is there a busy time of year?"

Kenton leaned back and stared into nothingness. "I guess we're always steady enough. I never ever have to worry about laying someone off from lack of business. We do get some special orders for Christmas sometimes. However, people always seem to be redoing their houses, so ... I suppose it comes in waves at times, but ... steady."

I asked how he got started in the business. Kenton went on to tell me how he had just built things in his garage when he was in his 30s. Friends started paying him to make things for them. After his reputation developed, even if small, he tried to jump into starting a business. He said the first year was rough just getting people to know of his service, but at the same time, he developed more and more skills with each job. After two years, he started taking on more employees and the business continued to grow. Over the years, the shop has doubled in size — twice. He said he'd like to retire at 65 but wasn't sure. He still seemed to be enjoying it. I was going to like being there.

Unless being gay was a problem.

"Kent, I ..."

"What is it?"

"I like it there ... at the shop. Already. I can tell. Your talk of it being a family. I ... really want to fit in and hope I'm an asset to the team. But ..."

"Larry?"

"This ... this seems early on to say this, but I'd kind of like to get it out in the open. I'd hate for it to be a problem later on."

"I'm listening."

"I'm ... I didn't leave a girlfriend back home. I didn't leave anyone back home. I'm ... I'm gay. I ... I ... I hope that isn't a problem."

Kent was quiet. I saw him swallow the bit he had just chewed as I was making my confession. He put his fork down.

"Do you drink?"

That threw me. That wasn't an answer to anything I had said.

"Huh?"

"Do you drink?"

"Um ... I guess. Maybe a beer now and then?"

"Good." He took another bite. As he chewed, his gaze looked upward. Then he returned to look me in the eyes. "No, Larry. It won't be a problem. At all. Please feel rest assured of that."

If there is such a thing as a mental exhale, I had just experienced it. I thought it idiotic of me to bring up the subject right away, but at the same time, I didn't want to start this new chapter of my life hiding things. Hearing his words made me feel as if I had made the right decision, although I knew it could have backfired.

We soon finished our meal, and he paid the bill. I thanked him for his generosity.

As we walked to our cars, he motioned me over to his. "Hop in," he said.

"What?"

"Just get in. We'll take one car."

"Where?"

It took us about eight minutes with a few red lights, but we soon pulled up outside a place called Daniel's. In the window was a rainbow flag made of neon.

"Is ... is this a gay bar?"

"Bar ... restaurant. Yeah, it caters to a gay clientele."

 

Kenton

Larry had a look of wonder. I gathered his small Kansas town didn't have any gay bars, but I had to feel this was not his first one.

"Did you know this street was here?" I asked.

"In an earlier visit, I ... think I drove down it during the day. I took it from a few of the windows and rainbow flags that this street is gay-friendly."

"Some would call it the gayborhood."

"Why did you bring me here?"

"Larry, I have a gay nephew. I've learned a lot from him. He's now 37 and teaches at W. Travis, the university here in town. He's an awesome guy and he taught me a lot. The fact that I feel completely comfortable enough to sit in a gay bar with you will hopefully make you feel welcome in our store and in our town."

"oh."

I asked if he liked Michelob, and Larry said that was fine. "Two drafts," I told the server.

I saw Larry look around. Nothing was too outlandish at Daniel's. Some posters of shirtless men. The uplighting of rainbow colors up one wall looked kind of cool. It was a Monday night, so the place was nowhere close to being busy.

Our server brought us our beers and winked at me.

"I think he might think I'm your sugar daddy."

Larry was blank. "I ... I don't think I know what that is."

I laughed. "Someone who likes young men and is willing to pay for everything to have them."

"Oh. Well, obviously not."

"But I am buying." That made me laugh. Larry awkwardly laughed with me.

He looked at the server who was wearing tight, leather shorts and a tight tank top.

"I wanted you to know this street was here," I said. "There's a great coffee place called Joe a block down. Two or three dance clubs, I think. Black Stallion has been here for ages. Country and western, but there is bound to be some disco place here too. Wait ... I think they call it techno."

Larry smiled at me. It was a comfortable smile.

"You'll meet people here, trust me."

Larry shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe. Eventually. That isn't what I'm really after. I don't think I'm really boyfriend material."

"What? You're a good-looking lug. Some guy would be happy to have you."

"I don't have a lot of luck with ... all that. I really did love someone in college. Deeply. He was a year older and left after graduation. I was actually at his wedding a few weeks ago. He and his husband live in Boston now, about to move to New York. We're still great friends."

"I see." I took a big swallow of my beer. "Everything in its own time."

"I'd be open to it, but I am by no means chasing after it."

"Fair enough."

We finished our beers, and I drove Larry back to his car at Great Wall.

"Thank you, Mr. ... Kent. I ... I really appreciate your generosity and welcome ... and your understanding."

"Think nothing of it," I said, reaching out to shake his hand. "I just want you to feel comfortable. Think of work as your second family. I'll see you in the morning."

 

—

 

Laramie

I got ready for bed. I decided what I would wear to work tomorrow. I saw the type of clothes the others wore. I figured I would get some things that would be conducive to the work at hand.

I called Grayson.

"Hey! What's up?"

"I had a great first day."

"Awesome! Tell me about."

I gave my brother the Cliff's Notes of my job and Mr. Shuppe.

"Sounds like a great fit," Gray said.

"I know. I think I'm going to love everything about. I love it here already."

"Good. That's good. Don't forget that each city has its drawbacks too. It can't all be Disneyland."

"I know. But ... I feel good, Gray. I do."

"I knew you would." He paused. "Mom called me today."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, she asked about your place."

"Hmm. She didn't ask me. What did you tell her?"

"Um. The basics. The layout of the house. I told her I hope you paint over those awful colors."

"Whatever."

He chuckled.

"I wonder if they found my carving I left in my bedroom."

"She did. She mentioned it to me."

She hadn't mentioned anything to me. It was nice that Grayson got a call, but I didn't.

"Did she say if she liked it?"

"Uh, I think. I guess. She just said it looked ..."

"It was modern. It was a cat, but I elongated it very tall, and it was sort of abstract."

"Yeah. She described it that way. What does Mom know about art?"

Apparently not enough to even mention it to me. But I wasn't going to get all disappointed. She would probably mention it when she called me. Then I wondered if she would call. Would Mom or Dad ever call me? Or was it up to me to make the call? These were new dynamics that had not been settled upon.

"Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I love my job."

"That's great, Lar'. Congratulations. I knew this move was the right thing for you."

After brushing my teeth, I got into bed and pulled the blanket up. Although the spring temperatures were nice in the daytime, the evenings were still very chilly. I got out of bed and adjusted the thermostat. As I walked back to bed, I stood at the edge. Back home, I could never walk around naked. This was my house. I could walk around naked if I wanted. It wasn't anything I ever longed to do, but ... fuck it ... I took off my briefs and T-shirt and walked to the living room naked. I walked into each room feeling empowered by my nudity. I giggled to myself as I slipped back into bed.

As I lay on my back staring at the ceiling in the darkness, I thought about the gay places my boss had shown me. What a cool boss. I didn't feel motivated to run down to this gayborhood immediately, but the fact that it was there brought me a sense of warmth. I could belong here. Having visited Boston with Freddy and Josh, I knew I didn't fit there. But I did here.

I recalled seeing a couple in Daniel's. Both of them were pretty handsome. They were about my age too. I reached for my dick and held it.

Maybe Kent was right. Maybe I could eventually find someone right for me. At least I had options. I pulled on my dick as it got harder.

For some reason, Julio and Amos popped into my internal movie screen. I shut my eyes. I started stroking my hard-on.

This was my house. As I jacked off to my fantasies, I could be loud if I wanted. I moaned as I chose to think of Amos and his hairy chest. I pictured him pulling off his shirt so I could have full view of his masculine fur. I moaned as I jerked on my cock.

Julio entered my imagination. The two of them looked at me and then turned to each other. Julio took off his shirt and his chest destroyed me. A stripe of hair ran down the center and it dove into a thick bush just peeking above his shorts. I pounded my erect dick.

Julio and Amos began making out in front of me. I could tell their tongues wrestled as they kissed. Their hands held their faces. Amos gripped the back of Julio's head. Julio ran his fingers down the sideburns of Amos. I groaned aloud as my enflamed penis throbbed.

They pulled themselves apart and I pictured Julio dropping his shorts. He showed me his full bush. Then he hung his shorts on his cock like a hook. Amos' bush was even thicker. His cock in my fantasy was an eight-inch sausage with girth I'd never seen. I howled as my hand groped my erection vigorously.

Amos ripped the shorts from off Julio's cock, and he plunged to suck his coworker. Julio moaned as loud as I did. He ran his fingers through Amos' hair. One of my hands ran its fingers through my hair. The other hand stroked my phallus with no remorse.

I moaned so loud that the two of them crawled on the bed with me. They hovered over me on their knees, jerking their own cocks just above mine.

"Oh yeah," I cried. "That's it guys. Jerk that meat. Come on me. Come on me."

They growled in agreement. Their huge cocks were displayed for me in their pounding thrusts. My cock was electrified. I was screaming. It was my house. I was allowed to scream.

"Come on me, guys! Come on me! Come! On! Me!"

Julio screamed and shot a rope of cum to my neck. Stream after stream shot across my chest. "Fuck yeah," screamed Amos. "Oh fuck. I'm coming." Amos unleashed a spray of clear cum like a fountain. It was intense as echoed by his groan.

It was my house. In my house I could do whatever I wanted. I shouted out.

"I'm coming too!" And then I groaned as if I was being murdered. I kept my eyes shut. Spurt after spurt shot from my cock. My real cum mingled with the imaginary cum all over my chest. My moaning became heavy pants. I tried to recapture my breath as my orgasm failed to stop.

I exhaled. "Whew." I opened my eyes to look at the result of my fantasy. "Wow."

It was my house. I could walk naked to clean myself off.

But I didn't want to. I pictured three men's cum on my chest and wiped the side of my hand through it to scoop up as much as I could. I pictured Julio and Amos and brought my palm to my tongue. I licked it all off. My orgasmic high still had my heart pounding. My tongue got every drop from my skin.

As my pulse returned to normal, I realized I shouldn't think of coworkers in that way. I knew such a fantasy was unwise. But I grinned at the freedom of Jackson Bend. The freedom of my house. The freedom of my new life, fantasies and all. I felt sticky. But it was my house, and I could fall asleep in my own sheets even if I was not cleaned up. I rolled over and ground my cock into the bed. A drop or two of leftover semen escaped. I could feel its slickness at the top of my cock as I rubbed it into the sheet. My sticky chest felt good against the bed.

"I like it here," I whispered to myself. I fell asleep within 90 seconds.

 

P * * * *

 

Look for a blog post called "Welcome to Jackson Bend" at timothylane414stories.blogspot.com

Email: timothylane414@gmail.com