Date: Fri, 07 Nov 2003 16:27:19 -0500
From: Daedalus 369 <daedalus369@hotmail.com>
Subject: "What Was I Thinking?"

All Rights Reserved.  Copyright 2003

What Was I Thinking?


   I woke up early on Saturday morning, just before dawn.  For a moment
I wasn't quite sure where I was.  All I knew was that I really needed
to take a piss.

   When I stepped outside I saw that a few other tents had sprung up in
the clearing.  I had purposely chosen this spot for its relative
seclusion.  They must have wandered over from the main group sometime
during the night and decided to pitch their tents here.

   Not a big deal though, I simply hadn't wanted to be completely
surrounded by the large number of other campers in our group.  I get a
little claustrophobic.

   I had been pretty wasted by the time I made back to my tent last
night.  Hell, I'm still a kind of loaded this morning.

   Looking around, I counted only five other tents loosely scattered
around the big glade.  Out of courtesy I figured that I should at least
hold it until I get out of the glade.

   After another moment's thought, I decided to grab my shower gear and
head on down to the facilities near the campsite's entrance.

   Scott and I had planned this white-water rafting trip a few months
ago.  Both of us had been coming up here to this campground about every
six months or so, for the past two years.  Scott likes the fishing and
I just really like camping.  We both like drinking.

   The last time we were here, just on impulse, we had joined in with
some other people who had come up for a rafting trip.  So this time
we'd decided to bring our own group for a rafting party.

   At this early hour I knew there would be no one in the showers, thus
plenty of hot water and privacy.

   Standing naked under the shower, I let the water rush over me.  It
felt good and I was just starting to relax when I heard someone turn on
another shower head.

   "Hey, how's it going?"  A voice said.  "Its Craig, right?"

   I looked over my shoulder and saw that it was Marc, one of Scott's
friends.  This guy just rubbed me the wrong way.  From the moment that
Scott introduced us, I had taken an instant disliking to him.

   "Alright."  I mumbled, turning back to my shower.

   Since he was a friend of Scott's I would make every effort to be
polite.  But there was no denying that I found him obnoxious, self-
absorbed and generally loathsome.

   Last night Marc had bragged incessantly about his "fabulous" acting
career.  It would have been a different thing altogether if anyone had
really known his work or was even remotely interested in his prattle,
but no one seem to care.  He wasn't even a B actor.  Only a two people
had recognized him.

   His wife or girlfriend, on the other hand, was sweet and terribly
hot, but mostly quiet.  Of course she couldn't get a word in edgewise
if she tried.  Scott's wife, Julia and the some of the other girls,
kept her company.

   Marc is extremely handsome with reddish-blond hair and deep blue
eyes.  He's got a ruggedly good looking face and a great build.
Unfortunately, he is acutely aware of his good looks.  He also has this
annoying habit of putting his face way too close when he speaks to you.

   "Some bash last night, huh?"

   "Yeah."  I mumbled, without looking his way.

   My head was still a little hazy from the previous evening's drinking
so I had no trouble tuning him out.

   He continued talking but I really wasn't listening.  Seems he had
been doing that ever since I met him.  Constantly vying for attention.

   At some point I happened to look around and catch a glimpse of his
sweet little ass.  His strong, tautly muscled body looked exceptionally
hot, gleaming under the shower's spray.  Something in me began to stir.

   My already bloated dick started to harden and rise and to my
embarrassment, that was precisely the moment he happened to turn around
and catch me checking him out.  He flashed me a smiled.

   I quickly turned my back to him.  My dick continued to rise and
throb.  I tried to think of something else, anything else to distract
me when suddenly, I heard was his voice right next to my ear.  It
startled the hell out of me.

   "So what's on your mind?"  Marc's voice rasped in my ear.

   He had crept right up next to me, his naked body was now right
beside mine.  As I spun around, he grabbed me and I instinctively
pushed him back, away from me.

   "What, too soon?" He laughed.

   "Too soon!?"  I barked, astonished.

   His dick was hard and jutting straight out in front of him like a
sword.  He grinned at me salaciously.  It made me feel a little dirty.
Meanwhile, my own dick was still betraying me by jumping and throbbing
vigorously.

   He took a tentative step forward, his hand encircled my pulsing
cock.  Still smiling at me, his pale blue eyes devoured me lewdly.  His
hard, muscled torso barely moved as he deftly manipulated my hardon.

   "Damn, you've got some big cock on you!"  Marc commented.  "And a
really hot body."

   A million thoughts whirled through my mind as he stroked me.  It was
difficult to focus.  I grabbed his hand, with every intention of
pushing it away.

   Then, without warning, he dropped to his knees and swallowed as much
of my dick as he could.  With nearly a third of my cock buried between
those wide stretched jaws, his face looked even more attractive to me.
He tried desperately to get it down his throat, but it just wasn't
happening.

   Still, his oral manipulation was more than I could stand.  Marc
definitely has skills.

   Water pouring down on my backside and his hands massaging my butt
cheeks I wrapped my hands around his head and pumped my hips.  My
thick, hard dick battered the back of throat as I pushed harder and
harder.  His eyes flew open and he gagged a few times.  He had to stand
bent over at the waist and work his head up and down, back and forth
and soon, after adjusting his position, he was able to take a good
portion of my cock into his throat for only a few seconds at a time.

   It wasn't long before he was coaxing the molten hot juices out of my
balls.  When he felt my body tense the first time, he pulled his head
back so I wouldn't choke him.  I unloaded in his mouth.

   Finally, I released his head, he turned away and spit out what
hadn't dibbled down his chin.  Then he looked up at me with very
innocent eyes and smiled.  Then he stood up and kissed me.  He tasted
of my cum which sort of disgusted me for some reason.

   Grabbing my hand, he used it to help him stroke his own dick while
we kissed.  Then he turned his back to me and pressed that perfect
little butt right into my crotch.  He wrapped my arms around him and
used my left hand to cup his balls and my right to help him jack his
still hard cock.  His strong, hot body felt really good against mine.

   Amazingly I started to get aroused again.  My dick nuzzled into the
soft cleft of his round ass.  I kissed his neck and ears while he
jerked himself off with my hand.  Before long my cock was starting to
stiffen again as his butt flexed against it.

   Marc's hand started to fly over his cock as he leaned back into me
and I rubbed his tight torso with my free hand.  Every muscle in his
body stiffed.  This excited me beyond belief.  My dick was rock hard
again and poking through between his thighs.  I wanted nothing more
than to fuck the hell out of him and I knew that I would soon.

   ---

   Scott and I have been friends for a few years now.  He works for
one of the companies that I do computer programming contract work for
occasionally.  He's the manager of their Information Systems
department.

   Up until a few years ago, I was just another work a day stiff, like
everyone else.  But I got pretty lucky.  A little talent, a little
skill and whole lot of luck has set me up for life.  Simply put, I
don't have to work for a living anymore.  The software game can be
really lucrative.

   I just take these contracting jobs to help occupy my time.  When I'm
idle for too long, I tend to get into trouble.

   After successfully completing a couple of projects together, Scott
and I became fast friends, which is unusual.  There's usually a lot of
competitiveness among some computer programmers.  That's why I
generally prefer to work alone.  But Scott and I really make a good
team.

   Julia, Scott's wife, is really a lot of fun too, except when she's
trying to fix me up with one of her random girlfriends.  Other than
that, she's very cool and hangs out with us a lot.  More often than
not, she's happy to get her devoted husband out of her hair for a
while.

   ---

   "What's going on with you, man?" Scott asked as I drove us over to
white-water rafting office to double check on our arrangements for the
trip down the river tomorrow.

   "What do you mean?"

   "You just seem a little weird this weekend.  Kind of withdrawn or
preoccupied or something, I don't know."

   He was right of course.  Generally, I'm a good natured, easygoing
guy, especially around people that I'm fond of, like Scott and Julia.

   However, after that little performance in the shower this morning, I
suppose I was a little preoccupied.  I had been careless and stupid.  I
hadn't given any thought to what might happen if Marc and I had been
caught in such a compromising position.  What was I thinking?

   Even though I'm reasonably sure that no one, especially Scott, knows
that I am capable of such behavior and I certainly wouldn't want him to
find out like that.

   "What, all of sudden you're my shrink?"  I laughed, playfully
thumping the side of his head.

   He retaliated with a quick little rabbit punch to my shoulder and we
both laughed.

   "No you schmuck, I just thought something might be wrong."

   "Nah, I'm alright."  I smiled, feeling something akin to brotherly
love at his concern.

   "How 'bout you?"  I asked, feigning serious worry.  "Are you
alright?  Anything you want to get off your chest?"

   "Ah, shut the hell up!"

   "Cause, you know I'm here for you."  I said, adding a fake tremble
to my voice.

   "You're such a jackass."  He laughed.

   I'm really very fond of Scott and his amiable personality, but some
things are best left unsaid between men.

   ---

   Back at our campsite, everyone seemed to be having a great time and
once again, it was pretty late or more accurately pretty early when I
decided to go off to my tent.

   As I lay dozing on top of my sleeping I thought I heard some
rustling outside my tent.  I tried to ignore it but couldn't.  Finally
I sat up and listened closely.

   The sound of zipping alerted me that my tent flap was being opened.
I raised up onto my elbows.

   "Anybody home?"  A voice whispered.

   It was Marc of course.  Just as I suspected.

   "Are you lost?"  I asked sarcastically.

   There was no answer.  Just some quiet, subdued movement in the dark.
I was clad only in boxers and a t-shirt.

   "Won't your wife be missing you right about now?"  I chided.

   "She's not my wife."  Marc whispered.  "Besides, I've already given
her what she needs.  Wore her out in fact.  Now its my turn."

   No more words were exchanged.  It was obvious what was about to
happen.  Sadly, we're two of kind.  Insatiable reprobates.  And as vile
and contemptible as I find Marc, I still find him damn sexy.

   There was no attempt to disguise my contempt for him.  And he didn't
pretend that it mattered to him one way or the other.  We both just
wanted to get off.

   He fumbled with the waistband on my boxers until I moved to take
them off myself.

   Marc wasted no time straddling my waist and positioning my hard
flesh pole at his opening.  I felt him slick the head of my dick with
his spit.  A lot of spit.  Then he started rocking his hips trying
desperately to relax enough so that my fat cock wouldn't rip his ass
hole apart.

   He grunted quietly and pushed himself down hard.  It took quite a
bit of time and effort before he finally pried himself open and the
head of my cock popped in.  He needed to rest a bit after that
struggle.

   Growing impatient, I grabbed his hips, holding him in place and
thrust upward with all my might.  I was able to advance only a few
millimeters up inside him before he drew in a sharp breath and collapse
forward onto my chest.

   "Take it easy dude, alright?"  He panted into my ear.

   It wasn't long before he was making tentative efforts to accommodate
more of my cock inside him.  It was slow going and I was growing
impatient again.  So, being careful not to lose any of the ground
gained so far, I carefully rolled him over onto his back and went to
work on him.  There wasn't very much room in my tent so I held his legs
tightly as I drove myself forcefully into him.

   After a few savage thrusts I was pretty deep inside his body.  Marc
bit down on his fist to keep quiet.  The only sounds were the
occasional sharp breaths through his nostrils.  I eased up for fear
that we might be overheard.

   When I finally hit bottom he recoiled violently and this time he did
yowl, rather loudly too.  I backed off a bit, then held perfectly
still.  My rock hard cock was throbbing and twitching in his tightly
stretched asshole.

   I let him wrap his legs around my body and we lay still for a while.
There were no other sounds and soon I started to fuck his upturned ass
again.  Slowly at first and then faster as my hips began to establish
their own rhythm.

   His ass muscles never seemed to loosen and the friction on my cock
was tremendous.  I could feel his hands trying to grip and grope my
back as I plowed his tight, hot butt.  Both of us covered in sweat and
so sexually charged that something had to give.

   I knew it immediately when he started to cum.  He began clutching at
me as if he feared that I might get away.  Then his whole body flexed
and spasmed again and again.  This drove me over the edge, setting my
own orgasm in motion.  The column of flesh I had buried deep inside him
began erupting violently.

   Massive tremors wracked my body as I shot volley after volley deep
into his butt.  I buried my face in his neck to keep from making any
noise.  And still I couldn't get enough.  I kept pushing and pulling
until the very last drop was fired.

   Finally, we were both still.  Trying desperately to breathe as
quietly as possible.  We lay like that for a long time, not moving at
all.

   ---

   The trip down river was a lot of fun.  On one particularly swift
rapid I "accidentally" pushed Marc over the side of our raft.  After
drawing a few nasty looks from the two women in our raft, I assumed a
posture of innocence.

   The guys, on the other hand, just laughed and seemed to get a kick
out of it.  Marc had been acting like a know-it-all jerk from the
moment that we launched.  Like he'd invented rafting or something.  So
I thought someone should take him down a notch.

   "That wasn't very cool."  Scott laughed at me.

   "I know." I said trying my best to look contrite.

   Then we both laughed.

   We fished him out of the water a little further down the river.  He
didn't seem any worse for the wear nor did he seem to harbor any
grudges.  Actually, he seemed to enjoy my little joke at his expense.

   He lost his paddle when he fell out and had to pay a hefty fee at
the end of the trip.  I offered to pay for it, but he wouldn't hear it
of it.  He took me aside and told me that he could think of a better
way for me to make it up to him, later.

   As I was packing up the last of my gear and getting ready to hit the
road, Marc approached me and asked me when we could get together again.

   ---

   I would have been happy if I'd never heard from Marc again.
Unfortunately, there was no such luck.  He called just a few days after
the trip and wanted to come over.  I was able to put him off until the
following weekend.

   After his call, I decided to get out of the house.  I headed to the
local computer store to see if they had anything new or interesting
before ending up at a little sports bar that I hadn't been to in quite
a while.

   "Hey, long time no see."  The bartender said as he served me a beer.

   I vaguely recognized his face and gave him a cheerful smile.

   "Yeah, its been a while."  I replied.

   "Where's your friend?"

   He was obviously referring to Jorge, a professor at the university
where I used to teach a programming class.  He and I used to frequent
this place.

   "I don't know."  I answered honestly.

   "I haven't seen him in a while either."  The bartender said.
"Thought you guys might have given up on this place."

   As he went off to attend another customer, my thoughts turned to
Jorge.  I hadn't seen him in quite some time myself.

   Eventually Nick came back to chat and see if I needed anything else.
After a few shots and some good natured conversation we were laughing
it up like old buddies.

   For every shot I buy, I buy one for him as well and we toast to
whatever comes to mind.  Turns out, Nick's a pretty fun guy.  And every
time he turns his back or bends over I get a real good look at that
high, tight, round little ass of his that seems to be stretching those
chinos to within an inch of their life.

   There is something about Nick's deep set, hazel eyes, shadowed under
those thick dark eyebrows that is utterly captivating.  The way they
seem to slant down slightly at the corners giving him a sort of sly,
sexy look.  Or a drowsy kind of sleepy look, depending on your point of
view.

   His short, thick, wavy black hair always combed back from his
handsome face adds to his tidy, clean cut appearance.  If I had to
guess, I would say he was of Mediterranean descent, perhaps Greek or
maybe Sicilian.

   Clearly, he takes good care of his lean, muscular body.  At six
foot, he's as tall as me and similarly built.  I could easily envision
his fresh faced smile being used to advertise everything from clothing
to sport utility vehicles.

   His enthralling presence is punctuated by a pleasantly mellow
baritone voice.  Handsome in a way that seems to implies a strong
masculine prowess.  One could never refer to his boyish good looks as
pretty.  On the contrary, Nick is a stud, with the subtle allure of a
guy who doesn't take himself or anything else too seriously.

   Over the next few days I ended up on the same barstool, day after
day, talking to and over-tipping Nick.  He seems glad for the company.
I particularly liked the way his face seem to light up when he saw me
coming in.  And since I'm between projects at the moment, I don't have
much else to do.

   I was surprised to learn that Nick had graduated Stanford University
which is only about thirty miles south of where I attended U.C.
Berkeley.

   "My friends and I used to go up to Berkeley all the time.  Some
pretty wild stuff going on up there.  Lot's of trouble to get into."
Nick commented.  "Too bad I never ran into you."

   "Yeah well, it's a pretty big campus.  Besides, I lived on base,
miles away from campus.  I went to school on Uncle Sam's dime, so I had
to be a good boy back then."

   "Military?"

   "Yeah, Marine Corps.  My life was all about work and school back
then.  Not much time for anything else."

   "Why'd you get out?"

   "Didn't have much use for it after I got my degree."  I answered.
"Then I moved back home to Ohio for a while."

   "And now you're back on the west coast."  He smiled.

   "Yeah, I don't know, there's just something about this place that
seems to call to me."  I smiled.

   Nick told me about his brief stints as an actor, a personal trainer
and now a bartender.  None of which he cared for very much.

   "What was your degree in?"  I asked.

   "Biomedical Engineering."

   "Why not do something along those lines?"

   "You really need an advanced degree if you want to do anything other
than flunky work.  I just got tired of researching and studying."  He
shrugged.  "Maybe I'll go back one day, who knows."

   ---

   Marc came over early on Friday night and we got right down to
business.  I sort of ambushed him while he stood out on my deck looking
over the water, drinking a beer.  I crept up quietly behind him and
snatched his shorts down to his ankles.  I fucked him right there.

   "Won't your neighbors see us?"  He grunted, as I tore into him like
a rampaging bull.

   "Shut the hell up!"  I said, slamming into his ass.

   I wanted to see just how far I could push this guy.  How much abuse
he would take from me before standing up for himself.  Besides, I knew
that it was too dark for anyone to see what we were doing up on my deck
with the lights off.  The living quarters and deck of my house start on
the second story, so Marc had a good view of the darkened beach and
black water as I tried to rearrange his internal organs with my
tremendous hardon.

   He started to get loud so I cuffed him in the back of his head and
told him to shut up.  He just held his head down, moaning quietly and
jacking his dick.

   When he came, he could hardly contain himself, shaking violently and
gripping the railing.  I continued to plow into his backside.  After he
was done coming he started to whine a bit.

   "Damn man, are you almost done?"  He complained.

   "I'll be done with I'm done."  I barked at him.

   This irritated me so I started pounding his ass hard as I could.  He
just held his head down, quietly whimpering.  His utter submission
seemed to do trick and I emptied my load into his guts, but by then he
was working on a new hardon.  His cock was all swollen again.

   After we got cleaned up, we talked for a while.  He seemed a lot
different now, almost likeable.  Of course that was after I had fucked
his brains out, so perhaps that's what it takes to make him more
agreeable.

   "You've got a bit of mean streak in you don't you?"  He commented.

   With my lust abated and being momentarily satiated, I sort of
regretted treating him the way I had.  That kind of behavior is really
out of character for me.  It has always been my way to treat others
like I would want to be treated.  And I was going to apologize, but
then I didn't.

   "What can I say, you bring it out in me."  I remarked glibly.

   On his way out, he leaned in for a kiss and I thrust my hand out
keeping him at bay.  He shook it and smiled.

   "See you again sometime?"  He queried.

   "We'll see."

   ---

   Not long after Marc left Jason showed up.

   "When was the last time you spoke with dad?"  He asked.

   He meant his dad, Andrew.  He always asks me that question but isn't
ever really interested in the answer.

   Andrew was my boss and good friend back in Ohio.  So he usually
calls me when he can't catch up with Jason.  Generally most of their
communications come through me since Jason used to live here.  Sadly,
Andrew and I are more like father and son than he and Jason.

   Andrew's a very wealthy man and great guy.  Probably has been all of
his life.  But somehow, Jason grew up to be an ill-behaved, self-
indulgent, spoiled bastard.  Nothing like his father.

   "So listen, Christian's been trying to get in touch with you."
Jason said.  "They're having another party and want you to come."

   "I know, I've been screening his calls."  I said.

   Christian, my erstwhile literary agent is one of the most
disingenuous people I've ever met.  He got my last book quite a bit of
attention, still I don't care much for him.  Besides not liking him
personally, it's the incessant calls about my next writing project that
make me want to avoid him.  He seems to think that we were friends
rather than client and agent.

   And even though I can't prove it, I think Jason's been sticking it
to Christian's wife.  Every time I bring it up, he never confirms nor
denies my suspicions.  But I know Jason well enough to know what's
what.

   I've observed the chemistry between them when they think no one is
looking.  At the very least, I'm certain that they've got the hots for
each other.

   "Oh come on, it'll be fun."  Jason urged.  "You know they always
throw the best parties."

   "I don't know, I'll think about it."  I said.

   Having lived with me for the past few years, Jason knows how to work
me pretty well.  He also knows that I will probably concede to his
wishes.

   "Come on Craig, if you don't go, I can't possibly go."

   "Yeah, you just want me to keep Christian occupied while you diddle
his wife."

   Jason sighed with exasperation.

   "Please Craig."  He implored with earnest eyes and that expression
that told me he was serious.

   "Don't use that look on me.  I invented that look."  I warned him.

   "Come on, dude!"

   "Alright, already."

   "What's with you lately?"  He asked.  "You've been in a foul mood
ever since you got back from that rafting trip."

   He was right of course, I have been sort of a dick, lately.  The
thing is, I'm not quite sure why.

   "Not to worry, this party will cheer you up."  Jason said, switching
back to the subject at hand.  "What time should I pick you up?"

   "Oh no you don't, I'm driving."  I said emphatically.  "You left me
stranded last time."

   "Yeah, sorry about that."  He smiled apologetically.

   The next evening when we showed up at Christian's, his wife behaved
as though she were mildly put out with me for not responding to their
invitation.  I cared even less for her than I did for Christian.

   She is pretentious, affected, clich^Â-ridden and not at all subtle.
However, she is mildly attractive.  She's got a great rack and a really
hot body.  I could almost see what Jason saw in her.

   The party was just as dull as I'd anticipated it would be.  That is
until all of a sudden there was a rather loud ruckus out by the pool.
Everyone rush out to see what was going on.

   I was astounded to see Nick, the bartender there having a showdown
with some woman.

   Some loud and melodramatic woman it seemed was having a go at him
and apparently Nick had had enough and was walking away from her when
she grabbed the back of his shirt and very nearly ripped it off him.
Everyone got a good view of his well defined abs and the nice butt.

   No one seemed willing to intervene until Christian came rushing over
and got things settled down between them.  That was when she decided to
storm out of the party, with a wildly dramatic flourish.  The likes of
which I haven't ever seen outside of a movie.

   Christian unobtrusively hustled Nick over to the bar and offered him
a drink.  I had been standing right there the whole time, watching Nick
and this woman's little melodrama play out before the crowd.

   "Oh, there he is."  Christian smiled, looking at me.  "Nick, have
you met my friend Craig?"

   Christian, trying desperately to ignore the recent unpleasantness,
introduced us.

   "Yeah, we know each other."  I smiled pleasantly, shaking Nick's
hand.

   Presently, Christian left us to attend his other guests.

   "So uh, everything alright?"  I asked.

   Nick didn't answer, he just took me by the shoulder and hustled me
out, away from the crowd.

   "Do you have your car here?"

   "Sure."  I said.

   "Do you think you could give me a ride?"

   "Of course, where to?"

   "Anywhere but here."

   I quickly found Jason and told him I was leaving.  He wasn't ready
to go and told me he'd be fine on his own.

   "You want me to take you home or do you want to go somewhere else?"
I asked as I drove.

   "Oh, I won't be going home tonight."  Nick informed me.

   "Well, if you need somewhere to crash, you're welcome to stay at my
place."  I said.  "If you want."

   "No, I don't want to impose."

   "Its no problem, really."  I assured him.

   Once we got to my place, I poured us both a drink from the bar then
grabbed a clean t-shirt for him.  The shirt he was wearing had been
practically ripped to shreds.

   "Thanks."  He said, shrugging off his tattered dress shirt.

   I couldn't help noticing his well sculpted torso.  The finely
chiseled pecs with a light dusting of dark hair, the amazingly ripped
abs and the ridiculously small waist.  At that moment, he looked for
all the world like a little boy trapped in a grown man's body.  My
heart started to pound in my chest, jarring my entire frame.  I
realized that I was staring, so I quickly busied myself getting more
ice for my scotch.

   Nick sat down on the sofa and downed his drink in one swallow.
Other than that, he showed no outward signs of distress stemming from
the earlier events at the party.

   "Another?"  I offered.

   "Absolutely, thanks."

   "Listen, I want you to make yourself at home here, alright?"

   "Cool, thanks man."

   After getting him another drink, I took a seat in my favorite
recliner next to the sofa.

   "This is a really place."  Nick said.

   "Thanks."

   Nick smiled at me with that innocent, boyish face which made me want
to ruffle his hair.

   "So, that was Nicole."  He said, shifting gears abruptly.  "Back at
the party.  I would have introduced you, but she was too busy losing
her fucking mind."

   "Oh"  I said.

   "Yeah, she likes a lot of attention.  Good or bad, it makes
absolutely no difference to her.  She just loves it."

   "I see."

   "Well, tonight was the last straw."  He said.  "I've had it up to
here with her little tantrums.  I'm fed up."

   I just sat quietly, watching his facial expressions alternate
between mild aggravation and vulnerability.  He ran his fingers through
his dark, wavy hair and finished his drink.

   "Help yourself."  I said, pointing toward the bar.

   "So what was the fight about?"  I asked.

   "Who the hell knows."  He shrugged.  "She just goes off on these
wild tangents.  I think she's on something, you know.  Her mood swings
have been increasing erratic lately."

   "That's a shame."

   "Yeah, well, its not my problem anymore."

   In effort to lighten the mood, I changed the subject.  We talked for
a while about nothing in particular.

   Then I showed him around the house, taking him upstairs to the loft
which had once served as sort of an office for me.  Long ago I had
converted it into sort of a guestroom,  when Jason lived with me.

   "It's a lot more comfortable than it looks."  I told him.

   Then I led him back down the stairs, through the living room, out
onto the deck.

   "The view's a lot better in the daytime."  I smiled.

   As Nick stared out into the darkness, I stole a sidelong glanced at
him.  Perhaps it was the long shadows, maybe it was the calm evening
breeze or the tranquil look on his face or maybe I was just horny
again, but he looked absolutely beautiful to me in that moment.

   So thoroughly masculine and virile, yet still quite boyish and
innocent.  One has only to hear his deep voice to be reminded that he
is a fully grown adult.

   I hadn't realize that I had turned my head and was full on staring
at him until he turned his gaze toward me.  With sort of a tilt to his
head and a quizzical look on his face, he smiled questioningly.

   Suddenly, I was acutely aware of how idiotic I must look, standing
there staring, not saying anything.  I tried desperately to think of
something to say, but nothing came.

   The moment stretched on uncomfortably.  Still, Nick held my gaze,
obviously waiting for me to say something.  Anything.

   Now I was completely self-conscious and thoroughly embarrassed, so I
dropped my eyes to my hands and fiddled nervously with my drink.

   "What's up?"  Nick asked.

   "Uh, you want another?"  I stammered, turning away without looking
up at him again.

   Quickly, I disappeared through the sliding doors without waiting for
Nick's answer.  "What a colossal fucking idiot you are!"  I thought as
I crossed the living room to the bar.

   Standing there I realized that I had a tremendous hardon.  It was
amazingly stiff, tenting out the front of my trousers.  Looking down at
it, trying to will it to go away, I heard Nick's voice coming up behind
me.

   "Everything alright?"  He asked.

   "Yeah, yeah.  Fine."  I answered, quickly maneuvering myself around
to the other side of the bar, trying not to expose my erection.

   Chuckling, he stepped up to the bar facing me.  This time it was his
turn to stare.  He seemed very amused.

   "You sure you're alright?"  He asked again.

   Unconsciously, I glanced down at my crotch and before I could even
form an answer, Nick was on my side of the bar.

   "What do you have back here?"  He asked, still grinning.

   He stopped dead in his tracks, eyes dropping to my protruding
crotch.  The smile never leaving his face, he looked back up at me.

   "Wow!"  He said, grinning seductively.  "Are you always this, uh,
shall we say enthusiastic, about having company?"

   Forcing an embarrassed smile, I poured myself another drink,
purposely ignoring his question.  Mostly because I couldn't think of
anything clever to say.

   Intending to give him a wide berth, I tried to get around Nick.  He
stepped directly into my path, preventing my escape.  We stood face to
face with only a few inches between our noses.

   The smile slowly faded from Nick's lips as his sleepy looking eyes
examined my face.  Looking me up and down, slowly taking my measure he
took a deep breath and exhaled appreciatively.  I was completely
immobilized under his gaze.  His beautiful, hazel eyes entrancing me,
accelerating my heart rate until I thought it might explode right out
of my chest.

   "Am I crazy, or did you just pay me a huge compliment?"  He asked.

   "Uh, crazy?"  I ventured, swallowing hard.

   "Oh, I don't think so."  He smiled teasingly.  "I've noticed the way
you look at me when you think I'm not looking?  The nearly
imperceptible flirting."

   "Yeah, now I know you're crazy."  I scoffed.  "Maybe its
imperceptible because its nonexistent.  Talk about wishful thinking!"

   "Wishful thinking, huh?"  He asked, groping my crotch.  "Is this
wishful thinking too?"

   "I'm going to give you five minutes to get your hand off my dick."
I smiled.

   "Five minutes, huh?"  He laughed, stroking my hardon through my
trousers.

   "Okay, ten."  My smile widening.

   We both leaned forward simultaneously and our lips met.  It just
happened naturally and easily, not fumbling and hasty.  Our tongues,
tentative at first, then playful, then tasting deeply from each other.

   I never wanted to kiss someone so much in my life.  Nick's lips are
so soft and full.  And his smell, intoxicating.  He even tastes good.

   My jaw went slack as he licked and sucked my lips.  My hands went
around his small waist, where I groped his ass.  I was surprised at how
strong and firm his round butt cheeks were.

   Nick gave me an enigmatic smile as I stared into his sexy, drowsy-
looking eyes, then at his beautiful ruddy, full lips.

   "What's so funny?"  I asked.

   "Nothing."  He said.  "I was just wondering when we were going to
get around to that."

   "Well, for the record, I assure you I wasn't flirting with you."  I
told him.  "I'm just a nice guy.  Lot's of people make that mistake."

   "Uh huh."  He grinned."

   Just then the phone rang.  It was Marc.  He wanted to know if he
could come over.  I told him that that was impossible and that I'd have
to get back to him later.

   When I hung up, I turned around to find Nick sitting comfortably in
my recliner.

   "I'm going to overlook it this time since you're a guest,"  I told
him, "but for future reference, you should know that that is my seat.
My favorite seat."

   "I know."  He smiled.  "It smells like you."

   I must have pulled a face because he started laughing hardily.

   "Don't worry, that's a good thing."  He chuckled.  "You smell good.
You always do, kinda like something new."

   He reclined fully in the seat, hands folded behind his head, eyes
half lidded and stared at me silently.

   "I'm ready for bed."  He announced.

   "Oh, alright, I'll get you some clean sheets then."

   "That won't be necessary."  He said.

   Nick stood unceremoniously and shucked off the t-shirt he was
wearing.  My eyes lingered over his incredible torso as he turned and
headed straight into my bedroom.

   A bold move, to be sure.  I stood there uncertainly for a moment,
then after a brief pause I went on in to find him already in my bed,
lying on his back, hands once again folded behind his head, clad only
in his boxers and a smile.

   Wasting little time, I disrobed and joined him.  We embraced and
kissed passionately.  I ran my hands over his hard pecs feeling the
soft hairs tickle my fingers.  Rolling around groping each other's
bodies, the air seemed charged with erotic tension.

   We wrestled each other into a sixty-nine position quickly removing
each other's shorts.  Nick's furious licking and sucking drove me wild.
His mouth was so hot, his tongue so relentless that I nearly forgot
about his hot, throbbing cock which was staring me right in the face.
All I could think about was getting into that sweet little butt of his.

   Taking as much of his long, thick dick into my mouth as possible, I
began playing with his tight little pucker.  I wet my fingers and
entered his hole.   He resisted at first, moving my hand away, but I
was insistent.  Eventually he gave in when my tongue found its way to
that tender and sensitive area just behind the ball sac.  Soon, Nick
was not only accepting but welcoming one, then two of my thick fingers
inside.

   Bathing and nibbling every inch of his crotch, I was driving Nick
wild.  Hips bucking and body trembling, he came close several times to
choking me on his torpedo.  We brought each other to the brink of
orgasm several times and backed off just in time.

   I couldn't take anymore so I climbed on top of him and lifted his
strong legs into the air.  I needed to get inside him immediately.
Nothing short of deep penetration would do at this point.

   "Dude, what are you doing?"  He asked.  "You're not getting that
monster anywhere near my ass."

   I could see that this was going to take a little persuasion.  So I
leaned in kissing him softly.  He relaxed his legs around my waist.

   "Come on man, I'll take it easy."  I assured him, kissing his lips
between each word.

   "Sorry dude, I just don't wanna do that."  He said.  "I can't."

   "What does that mean, you can't?"

   "That means, I never have."  He said, his earnest eyes stared locked
onto mine.  "It means I won't."

   Frustrated, I set about the business of convincing him that he could
and in fact, would concede to my lust.

   I kissed and licked his neck and ears.  I tongue bathed his chest
and nipples which stoked his fire more than I'd expected.  Working my
way back down to his crotch, I spent a lot of time tasting his strong
stomach muscles.  He seemed to get a big thrill out of it when I bit
lightly into his flesh.

   Working all around his dick, I drove him wild nibbling and biting
his inner thighs and sucking his balls.  Finally, I took his rod into
my mouth again.  Then, abruptly I moved back down to that area just
behind his balls.  This sent a wild shudder through him.

   Then I did it.  I allowed my tongue to stray a little further south.
As soon a I found my target, I seized his legs and drew them up in the
air for better access.

   Obviously this surprised the hell out of him because he nearly
jumped off the bed.  I went to work on his ass, probing and licking as
if my life depended on it.  Nick mumbled and grumbled and swore under
his breath as I stoked his fire with my tongue.  His entire body
trembled and shuddered under my tender care.  I was enjoying his
reaction as much as he was enjoying my tongue.

   Turning him face down on the bed I massaged those beautiful ass
checks, then nibbled and kissed them before attacking his hole again.
I spread his legs wide and went to work on him again.  He humped the
mattress wildly before reaching beneath himself to stroke his cock with
his hand.  I prevented this by holding onto both his hands.  This drove
him crazy and he began pleading incomprehensibly.  I couldn't
understand his words but I knew what he wanted.  Relief.

   Once I had sufficiently overloaded his senses, I lay forward,
covering his body with mine.  Nestling my hard cock between his butt
cheeks, I put my lips close to his ear.

   "You ready now?"  I whispered, wetly kissing his ear.

   Nick just buried his face in the pillow and wiggled his ass around
against my stiff cock.

   Using a ridiculous amount of lube, I got him ready for the task
ahead.  I knew this would only work at his own pace, so I just position
my cock head at his entrance and just held it there.  I reached under
him and began slowly stroking his hardon under his belly.  Soon he was
pushing his butt back again me.  Tentatively at first, then more
forcefully until he felt himself start to open up, which caused him to
tense up and clench his muscles.

   Kissing and nibbling his neck and ear seemed to calm him and soon he
was pushing back into me again.  When I felt to moment was right, I
gave a forceful shove and popped the head of my cock inside him.  There
was so much lube between us that he couldn't have stopped my forward
progress if he wanted to.  But I knew how painful this probably was for
him so I held still while tensed and flexed and eventually relaxed
again.

   Grunting, swearing and sweating, he reached back and gripped my ass
checks pulling me into him.  I allowed my full weight to slowly ease
my cock into his ass.  Slowly and steadily, I slid into him.

   "Stop!"  He suddenly yelled, when I nearly halfway in.

   The urgency in his voice startled me.

   "Alright.  Okay."  I soothed.

   "Just wait.  Wait."  He grunted through clenched teeth.

   Panting and turning his head from side to side, he started to rise
up like he was going to push me off his back, but then seemed to change
his mind.

   "Fuck, this hurts!"  He grumbled under his breath.

   "You want me to take it out?"

   "Just be still for a minute."  He growled.

   I was still.  Nick buried his face in the pillow again, then turned
his head to the side.  Gently I kissed the side of his face and stroked
his head.  I seriously considered withdrawing from him.  I didn't want
to cause him anymore pain.

   As I started to pull back, he moved with me preventing me from
disengaging from him.  I wrapped my arms around his chest and pulled
him up into a kneeling position which also impaled him further on my
rod.  With one loud exhalation of his breath, he took the rest of my
cock up inside himself.

   Almost immediately he began stroking his cock and moving up and down
on my lap.  When the sounds he was making started to sound less like
hard work and more like pleasure, I gently urged him forward into a
doggie-style position and began slowly fucking his ass.  Already he was
meeting my thrust with his butt.

   He was still so incredibly tight that I had no trouble believing
that I was indeed the first to break ground here.  Whether it was true
or not, the idea of being the first to open him up escalated my level
of excitement and my hips took over.  I started thrusting into him like
a madman.  There was no way to stop it now, my orgasm was nearly upon
me.  Then, like a tremendous crash of thunder, I exploded.  Wave after
wave of orgasmic bliss swept over me as I pounded his tight little
butt.  I lost all control as I jack-hammed Nick's asshole.

   Before I knew it we were both up on our knees, his back pressed
firmly to my chest, my arms wrapped tightly around him.  My hips still
pumping his backside.  At that moment I needed him more than anything
I'd ever needed before.  I held onto him for dear life.

   "Oh man, that's good."  I heard Nick mutter quietly.

   Suddenly, his entire body seized as he unloaded his tightly coiled
balls.  Spurt after spurt erupted from him as he leaned back into my
chest.  My hips continued to pump until I had to consciously will them
to be still.  I wasn't ready to stop.

   Finally, Nick disentangled my arms, for I wasn't yet ready to
relinquish his body and eased himself off my still hard cock.  We lay
there side by side, sweaty and exhausted.

   After a while I suggested a shower and Nick agreed.  There is more
than enough room for four people in my glass block shower, so we got in
together.  Once we'd thoroughly cleaned ourselves, Nick noticed that I
was hard again.

   "Dude, that can't be normal."  He said, indicating my condition.

   "Oh, it'll go down as soon as you're either dressed or at least out
of my direct line of sight."  I told him.

   "You sure know how to flatter a guy don't you?"  He smiled.

   After changing the sheets, we both lay there in the dark staring at
the ceiling.

   "You alright?"  I asked.

   "Yeah."

   In just a few minutes Nick was fast asleep, snoring lightly.  I can
never sleep well with anyone else in my bed.  I've never been quite
sure why.

   Looking at him sleeping there reminded me of Jorge.  The thought
startled me and I quickly pushed it out of my mind.

   I was able to doze for a few hours before I got up and made coffee.
Nick slept rather late.

   When he finally did awake, I was at my desk reading the morning
paper.

   "Hey."  Nick said sleepily, emerging from my room.

   "Hey yourself."  I said.  "There's coffee in the kitchen.  I was
going to make some breakfast but I then I remembered that I don't like
to cook.  Sorry."

   "That's alright."

   "There's cereal, pop tarts or if you want, you could cook up
something up."

   "Any juice?"

   "In the fridge."  I said.  "Help yourself to anything you see in
there."

   I turned my attention back to the newspaper.

   "Oh, I nearly forgot, your buddy came into the bar the other day."
Nick said, sitting down next to my desk with a tall glass of juice.

   "My buddy?"

   "Yeah, that guy you used to come in with all the time."

   "Oh?"  I said casually, trying to maintain a neutral tone.

   Of course he was talking about Jorge.  I disliked thinking about
him, it made me melancholy.  What I really wanted to know was if he'd
come in alone or with someone, but I didn't ask.  It felt too much like
an act of desperation.

   "So what's the deal?  You guys don't hang out together anymore?
Nick asked.

   "No, I suppose we don't."  I shrugged, nonchalantly.

   "Oh, I thought maybe you guys were still tight."  He said.  "What
happened?  Did he find out about you?"

   I looked up from the paper at him.  I almost laughed.  He was
probing.  Perhaps testing the waters to see what was what.

   "Find out about me?"  I asked smiling.

   "Yeah, that you're gay."

   Now I did laugh.

   "I object to being characterized as gay."  I said.

   It was his turn to laugh now.

   "What would you call it then?"  He chuckled.

   "I don't know."  I said.  "But the word gay implies a lot of things
that don't really apply to me."

   "For instance?"  He asked still chuckling.

   "For instance, when people hear the word gay or bisexual, all of
sudden they want to define you by a sexual identity rather than by who
you actually are or who they perceived you to be before they heard that
word.

   "Lots of people hear the words gay or bisexual and immediately think
of some mincing little fairy or some crusader who is out to make over
the whole world in their queer image or some sort of sexual predator.

   "Even if they've known you for a long time, some people can't help
conjuring that image of an effeminate little weakling, out to jump the
bones of every man they lay eyes on.

   "There are lots of guys out there who don't identify with those
words because they simply don't apply.  Life is rarely as simple as the
labels we tend to hang on people.

   "Why do I have to wear any label at all.  I'm just a guy.  And there
are millions of others out there just like me, who don't want to fit
into some lame stereotype or preconceived notion of who they are or who
they should sleep with.

   "It seems ridiculous to exclude nearly half the population based on
their gender.  If someone is good to me, I'll be good to them and
that's all that matters."

   Nick's brow had clouded over while I rambled, but when he saw that I
was finished his face brightened again.

   "Are you done?"  He asked.

   I sighed in exasperation, shaking my head.

   "No dude, I get it. A simple man with complex tastes."  Nick
chuckled.  "Now can we move on?"

   "That's a bit of an over simplification, but yeah, I suppose we can
move on."  I conceded.

   "Jeez, lighten up, dude."  He said, still smiling.

   I scoffed again.

   "Been waiting a long time to get that off your chest, have you?"

   "Yeah, I suppose."

   "Feel better?"

   "A little."  I laughed.

   "So anyway, what did happen?"  He prompted.

   It took a moment for me to realize what he meant.  I had rambled on
for so that I'd forgotten what we were talking about.

   "Did you make a move on him or something?"  Nick asked.

   "Of course not.  I don't have any moves."  I said truthfully.
"Actually, we broke up."

   "What do mean broke up?"  Nick questioned.  "You mean you guys were
together-together?"

   "Yeah."

   "Wow, that's unbelievable."  He said.  "And you broke up?"

   "Yep."

   "I suppose in hindsight, I can see it.  I mean, you never even
looked at me twice when you came in with him."

   "Dude, I'm telling you, I was not flirting with you."

   "Whatever."  He said with a dismissive gesture.  "Why'd you break
up?"

   "Its complicated."

   "Try me."

   "Well, Jorge is was the head of the history department at the
university where I used to teach a computer programming class.  He's a
brilliant man, speaks several languages fluently and has an amazing
amount of knowledge on nearly everything.  Yet he's very congenial
about it, unlike most of those intellectual snobs who like to call
themselves his peers or contemporaries.

   "He's more like pop star than a dean at that school.  Everyone loves
him there, students and faculty alike.

   "The amazing thing is that he's only a few years older than me.  I
suppose he's been on the fast track all of his life.  He was already
published several times over by the time he was twenty-five.

   "Sounds like a hell of guy."  Nick said.

   "Yeah, I can't recall exactly how we met but we became friends.  You
know baseball games, drinking and hanging out.  Nothing out of the
ordinary."

   "How long were you guys 'friends'?"

   "A few years, I guess."

   "So why'd you break up?"

   "You know the guy I was talking to at the party last night, Jason?
Well, he's the son of a very good friend of mine from back east.  He
was having some problems getting his life together, so it was decided
that he's come out here and stay with me."

   "No, I can't say that I remember him, I was a little preoccupied at
the time, if you recall."  Nick commented.

   "Oh, well, anyway, he's a really good guy and I'd rather die than
have him find this out, but Jorge took issue with him living here with
me.  And even though I assured him there was nothing going on between
Jason and I, he remained unconvinced.  I can't say that I blame him.

   "Of course, there was just no way I was going to kick Jason out.
His dad, Andrew, has done so much for me over the years.  He was my
boss at one time, but also a good friend and mentor.  He's like a
father to me in many ways.  I wouldn't be where I am today if it
weren't for him.

   "Andrew helped me and another guy broker a deal to sell a software
package that we developed for a great deal of money to a large
corporation.  Thanks to him, I'm pretty much set for life.

   "And there's also that fact that Jason really seemed to need me.  I
mean he was really floundering, aimless and headed for big trouble.
There was really no question.

   "And that was that.  Jorge gave me an ultimatum and I haven't seen
him since."

   "Wow, I had no idea."  Nick sympathized.

   "Yeah well, whatever."  I said, trying to sound like I was over it.

   "And so you and Jason?"

   "No, nothing like that."  I said.  "Well, actually there was some
monkey business years ago, when I went back east for Andrew's last
wedding, but I put an end to that before ever agreeing to let him come
live with me."

   "Those were the conditions, that there was to be no fooling around
between us and that he finish grad school.  So I took him under my
wing, much like his father had done for me so many years before."

   "And now?"

   "Well, now he's got his own place, finished grad school and is quite
the upstanding citizen.  Of course, he still treats this place like his
own and likes to tell people that I'm his older brother even though we
look almost nothing alike.

   "He's come a long way from the spoiled, little brat he was when I
first met him.  Andrew is very grateful.  And I would do nearly
anything for him."

   "Well, sounds like you made the right choice."

   Nick's eyes were studying me and starting to make me a little
uncomfortable because I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

   "Its still hard to believe that you guys were together.  You both
seemed so, I don't know, like regular guys."  Nick said.  "Sometimes
you just never know."

   I wanted to get off this topic.  I was tired of thinking about Jorge
and the past.

   "Anyway," I said, "what about you?"

   "Oh yeah, that reminds me, I've gotta call and see if that place is
still available."  Nick said, suddenly distracted.

   "What place?"

   "Oh, I started looking around for another place about two weeks
ago."  Nick said.  "I guess it was inevitable.  Nicole's been out of
control for a while now.  Can I use your phone?"

   Nick made a few quick calls and took off.

   As soon as Nick was gone Jason showed up.

   "Hey, you wanna go to the batting cages?"

   "Yeah, let's go."

   "Who was that on his way out when I was coming in?"  Jason asked on
the way out to my Jeep.

   ---

   On the way to the batting cages Jason questioned me endlessly about
Nick.  He was so full of questions that I was hardly able to
concentrate on my swing.

   "Dude, I told you he's just a friend."  I said, missing three balls
in a row.

   "Why does he look so familiar?"  Jason asked.

   "Do you see this bat?  You know what I'm going to do with it if you
don't stop bugging me don't you?"

   "Why does he looks so familiar?"  Jason asked.

   "Alright, that's it!  Out of here, out of the cage!"  I ordered.
"You're driving me crazy."

   Later that evening Nick called and asked me to meet him at some
seedy bar in the valley.  I agreed.  When I got there I didn't see him
anywhere, so I hung around near the bar sipping a beer.

   I was astonished when the band came on the stage.  There was Nick
standing up there with some other guys.  They played a full set of
cover songs with Nick singing lead and playing rhythm guitar.  They
were quite good.

   When the set was over Nick joined me at the bar.

   "I didn't know you were in a band."

   "I'm not really.  I just fill in when their singer isn't available."
Nick said.  "He's in like two other bands."

   "You're really good."

   "Thanks."

   He introduced me to the good looking, Asian bass player and the
extraordinarily handsome, black guy who'd been on the drums.  The other
guitar player was too busy with his groupies to be bothered.

   "You guys got any original songs?"  I asked.

   "Yeah, but Nick's too busy to come to practice and learn them."
Jack, the bass player said.

   Kurt, the drummer told me where they'd be playing next.  He was
gorgeous and I had to force myself not to stare.  In fact, they were
all quite good looking.  Not at all your typical band.

   Nick followed me back to my place when the bar closed.

   "Dude, I am very impressed."  I said.  "I didn't know you could sing
like that."

   "Yeah, well, I just do it to help those guys out.  I don't really
have any passion for it like they do."  Nick said.


   ---

   Some days later, I helped Nick move his belongings out of Nicole's
apartment and into, of all places, a trailer park.  Before then I
hadn't known that Nick owned a motorcycle.  I cleared a spot in my
garage for him to park it and he drove his pickup.

   "Not that there's anything wrong with it, but why'd you pick this
place?"  I asked.

   "Well," he said, hefting a large duffle bag onto his shoulder, "I
had to get out of Nicole's ASAP and this was fast, affordable and not
too far from work."

   "I see."

   "Besides, wait until you meet the manager.  He's kind of out there."
He laughed.

   The whole time we were moving his things in I couldn't keep my eyes
off him.  He was wearing tight jeans and t-shirt that seemed painted on
his finely chiseled torso.  Every time he bent over flexed in some way,
I was enthralled by his masculine beauty and the adeptness in his
simple movements.  The way the sinews in his upper back and arms
rippled, the way his butt muscles flexed, it was absolutely
captivating.

   When we were done Nick and I kicked back in his new digs and chugged
a few beers.

   He came over to where I was sitting on the counter top and stood
right between my knees.  For a minute he just stared at me, then he
grabbed the back of my neck, pulled my head to his and kissed me.

   "You wanna get it on, don't you?"  He said, unfastening my belt.  "I
know you've been thinking about it all day."

   "I have?"  I asked.

   "You have."  He smiled.  "You've had that look all day long.  I
could almost feel your eyes burning into my backside.  There was one
point when I think I saw a little drool in corner of your mouth."

   "You're lying!"

   We both laughed then kissed again.

   Just then there was knock on the door, which startled both of us.
Nick took a step back from me, composing himself and I tried to assume
a nonchalant posture.

   "Come on in, its not locked."  Nick shouted.

   The manager of the trailer park opened the door and came in.  He
dressed so androgynously, that at first I wasn't sure it was a guy.
Then he started to speak and I knew he was man putting on a very
effeminate falsetto voice.

   "So, I see you're all settled in."  He said, sashaying in the tiny
little space of the trailer.

   "Yep, all done."  Nick smiled cordially.  "Oh, this is Craig, a very
good friend."

   Somewhere on the edge of my consciousness, I was vaguely aware that
Nick had stressed the word 'very', but I was too awestruck by this
strange looking little guy who'd just walked in to take much notice.

   I was about to hop down off the counter and shake his hand when I
remember that my belt was undone so I just sort of waved and smiled.

   The odd little guy gave me the once over and then gave Nick the same
examining look, rolling his eyes and clicking his tongue.  I was a
little amused and repulsed all at the same time.

   "Well, you'll let me know if you need anything."  He said, looking
back and forth between Nick and I.  "Anything at all, okayyy?"

   "Yeah, I sure will."  Nick smiled, making a move toward the door.
"Thanks for stopping by."

   After he left we just stared at each other for a moment and then
started to giggle like little boys.

   "Wow!"  I said.

   "Yeah, he's been trying to get my attention since the first day he
showed me the place.  I told him that I was seeing someone, you know,
just to keep him at bay."

   "Not your type, eh?"

   "I don't have a type, per se."  He said.  "But if I did, he
certainly wouldn't be it."

   I just watched his handsome face as he talked.  Nick went over and
locked the door.

   "Now, where were we?"  He asked, stepping right up to my body and
staring at me.

   We held onto each other kissing and groping.  Then I turned Nick
around and bent him over the bolted down table.

   After peeling down his jeans, I worked his asshole open with some
olive oil before lubing up myself up.  I slowly slid the entire length
and girth of my steely hard cock up into that sweet little butt of his.

   Nick just made guttural growling animal sounds and pounded his fist
on the table top as I entered him.  I was a little surprised at his
ability to take it all in one fell swoop, but then he reached back
urging me to be still once I was as deep in him as I could get.

   I could think of nothing but how magnificent his body looked.  The
vast, muscular expanse of his upper back and shoulders, every muscle
tense and rippling as he strained to accommodate my intruder.  The way
his back dramatically tapered down to his very narrow waist and his
beautiful, tight little butt pushed right up against my crotch.  These
are the moments that make life worth living.  This connection, this
warmth.  But its so fleeting.

   My cock throbbed and pulsed inside that tiny little opening of his,
stretching it wide.  His white knuckled hands gripped the far edge of
the table and he seemed hardly able to breathe for a while.  Then
slowly, the panting gave way to deep breathing and finally he lifted
his head and began to stroke himself under the table.

   I eased my rod out of him, nearly to rim and immediately pushed
right back into him.  He let out a loud sigh and dropped his head to
the table again.  Then I began to fuck him, pounding that sweet little
ass like there was no tomorrow.

   Nick took my relentless hammering like a champ.  He made almost no
noise until he began to cum.  Then he pounded the table top with his
fist while stroking himself into oblivion with his other hand.  I could
feel every pulsing shot he spewed as his tightly contracting ass
muscles gripped my cock.

   This, of course set my orgasm in motion and my body seized like it
was shot through with a jolt of electricity.  I began shooting deeply
inside him.  I fucked and pounded and pushed as I fired round after
round of my hot juices inside Nick.  I couldn't seem to get close
enough or deep enough into him.  I pushed and shoved and worked my hips
until my knees were ready to give out.

   Finally, I collapsed onto Nick's back, still buried as far into him
as I could get.  I was exhausted but still I wanted more.  When I
finally disengaged from his butt, I was spent but still greedy for more
Nick.

   I turned him around and kissed him passionately in an effort to show
my profound appreciation and growing affection for him.  Nick
reciprocated in kind.

   Holding him close I just stared into his beautiful, drowsy looking
eyes, resisting the overwhelming urge to say what I was feeling for him
at the moment.  So I said nothing, just pulled him close in a tight
embrace.

   I'm fully aware that orgasm is a chemical trap.  I tend to say and
do things that feel right at the moment because of the endorphins
released into my system during sex.  So I've learned to just hold my
tongue until the tide of emotion has receded before I say anything.
But at that moment all could think was how much I loved and appreciated
him.

   Due to my slight claustrophobia I had no desire to spend the night
in Nick's new but very confined sleeping quarters, so I suggested that
we go out to dinner.  Afterward I would suggest that we back to my
house.

   On our way out to my Jeep, I saw the trailer park manager watching
us from a distance.  He gave me a little smirk as though he didn't like
me very much.  I shot him a wink and an insincere little smile.

   "See you later."  He yelled in Nick's direction.

   "I think someone has a little crush on you."  I said as we drove
off.

   "Yeah, I know."  He chuckled.  "You don't hide it very well."

   "Not me, you jackass.  I meant that guy."  I said indicating to the
little queen waving at us.

   "I was just kidding, I knew what you meant."  Nick laughed.  How do
you think I got the place so fast and cheaply."

   "You're kind of a slut, aren't you?"  I chuckled.

   "A little bit, yeah."  He smiled.

   ---

   When we got back to my place, the phone rang immediately.

   "Hello?"

   "Hey Craig, busy?"

   It was Marc.  I hadn't heard from him in a while and was kind of
taken aback when I heard his voice.  I'd had a sex dream about him the
other night where he kept try to get me to take his shirt off.

   "Sort of, yeah."  I answered.

   "Well, you want to get together soon?"

   "No, I don't think so."  I said, feeling a little weird with Nick
sitting there in my recliner, clearly within earshot but not looking at
me.

   "Well, when's a good time for you?"  Marc asked.

   "Look, I'll have to get back to you, okay?"

   After I hung up, I glanced at Nick sitting there, he looked up just
in time to catch my eye.

   "Everything alright?"  Nick asked.

   "No, not really."  I answered.  "There's something I want to talk to
you about."

   I explained all about Marc and the little arrangement that we had.
I'm not sure why I told him or what I even expected him to say.

   He was quiet for a moment, seemingly pondering what I'd just told
him.

   "So, its just sex, right?"  Nick said after a moment.

   "Yeah, pretty much."

   "Okay."  He shrugged.

   "I was just about to tell him that our little arrangement was off,
but I didn't want to start that whole conversation with you sitting
right here, you know?"

   "What, because of me?"  Nick asked.  "Dude, its cool.  Don't
rearrange your life on my account."

   He seemed completely sincere, without the slightest trace of sarcasm
or animosity.

   "Listen, we're buds right?  I like the way things are."  He said.
"If we start imposing sanctions and conditions on each other, its just
going to make things weird between us.  I don't want that, do you?"

   "Yeah.  No, of course not."  I answered, a little confused.

   "Good."  He smiled.

   Nick went out and downstairs to the ground floor.  The ground floor
of my house is only accessible by the outside stairs.  The entire
ground floor separated by a large sliding door.  The front part is the
garage and behind that is a finished area that serves as the basement.
Its mainly a storage area with a washer and dryer, along with a lot of
free weights and exercise machines.

   After a while I followed him down there and found him working out.
I just stood there for a moment watching him.  He was using the squat
rack.  It was very erotic.

   "So that's how you keep your ass looking so hot."  I said.

   "No, that's just a bonus.  I do this to keep my legs from looking so
scrawny."

   "Your legs don't look scrawny to me."

   "Good.  Its all worth it then, isn't it?"  Nick smiled.

   Sitting there on the bench staring at him, Nick's ass looked so
sweet, I couldn't take my eyes off it.

   ---

   The next day, while I was rummaging through some files at my desk
and talking to Nick, he noticed a folder with some of my stories in it
laying on my desk.

   "What's this?"  He asked, picking up the folder.

   "Just some stuff I've been writing."

   "I didn't know you were a writer."

   "I'm not, I've only had one book published.  And that stuff there
isn't really publishable material.  Very risqu^Â."

   "Oh porn, huh?  Let me see."  He said, taking the folder and all it
contents.

   "Yeah, there's a website called 'The Nifty Archive' where you can
post that kind of stuff.  They were kind enough to accept those stories
you have there."

   Nick sat quietly in my recliner for the next few hours reading them.
He didn't utter a word or make a sound for hours.  I started to feel a
little creepy and self conscious.

   Most of those stories are very revealing and deeply personal.  I
started to regret letting him read them.  Posting it on the internet,
where I can remain anonymous is one thing, but this felt too weird.

   After what seemed like an eternity Nick looked up at me.

   "You posted these on the internet?"  He asked.

   "Yeah, why?"

   "No reason."  He shrugged.  "They're pretty good."

   "Thanks."  I said, trying not to look directly at him.

   Then, another long silence.

   "You're still in love with him aren't you?"

   "Who?"  I asked, knowing very well who he was referring to.

   "Jorge, of course."

   I didn't answer right away.

   "Yeah, I suppose, in a way."  I said.  "But that's in the past.  All
over and done."

   "Who are you trying to convince, me or you?"  Nick laughed.

   "Most of that stuff is just made up anyway.  You know,
embellishments for better story telling."

   "Not the stuff about Jorge."  He said knowingly.  "And certainly not
this one here, called 'Missed Opportunity'.  Its not hard to tell the
difference."

   Nick was staring at me with those sleepy looking eyes, as if he was
trying to piece together a puzzle or find the solution to some sort of
problem.

   After a few seconds he got up and brought the folder over to my desk
and put it down.  Then, he just stood there looking down at me with his
head cocked a little to the side, sort of examining my face.

   "What?"  I asked, sounding a little more annoyed than I actually
was.

   He didn't say a word.  He just smiled and leaned down and kissed me
on the forehead.  Then he went out onto the deck.

   Neither of us said much to the other for the rest of the day.  Nick
just sort carried around this preoccupied looked on his face.  Later
that night in bed he began to speak.

   "I'm glad I met you."  He said quietly.

   I wasn't quite sure what to say, so I was quiet.  Then he went on.

   "You know, when you and Jorge first started coming into the bar I
had this little fantasy in my head where you and I got together.  It
was really hot, but only because I was so sure that it wouldn't happen.

   "There was no way I or anyone else could tell that you might be into
it.  And it certainly never once crossed my mind that you and he might
be his boyfriend.

   "He was a cool enough guy and good looking too.  But there was just
something about you.  At first I thought you were an asshole, kind of
aloof, like maybe you thought a little too highly of yourself.

   "I mean, it was virtually impossible to engage you in any sort of
small talk when he'd go off to the rest room or whatever."

   "So you were trying to chat me up, huh?"  I smiled.

   "Yeah, I guess I was, but you weren't having any of it."

   "Sometimes it takes me a while to warm up people."

   "Then when you started coming in by yourself, you were like a
completely different guy, you know?  But now I get it.  After reading
your stories, I totally get it."

   "You do, huh?"

   "Yeah, whether you know it or not, there's some pretty revealing
stuff in there."  Nick said.

   "Perhaps."  I said.  "Or maybe I've just got a good imagination."

   "That's cool too, but its gotta come from somewhere."  Nick said.
"So, that's why I'm glad I met you.  You're a decent guy, kind of a
perv, but decent."

   "Thanks.  I think."

   ---

   I awoke to sound of the ringing phone.  Who the hell could that be
this early on a Saturday morning.  It was Andrew calling from back
east.

   "Hey Champ, how's it going?"

   "Good, real good."  I yawned into the phone.

   We talked for a while, catching up.

   "So listen, I'll be in town one day next week, Tuesday I think, and
I'd like to have lunch with you and Jason while I'm there."

   "You're only gonna be here for the day?"

   "Not even that long.  I have to fly up to San Francisco right after
my meeting."

   "Alright, cool.  Well, I'll be looking forward it."

   "So, if you can track Jason down, let him know, will you?  I've left
him two messages already.  I see that kid is still not good at
returning calls.

   "Oh yeah, no problem.  I'll make sure he knows."

   In fact, I hadn't heard from Jason in more than a week.  Typically,
he's either at my house or calling almost daily.  So I called him, no
answer, just the machine.

   By the time I got off the phone Nick was in the shower.  I got up
and had some coffee.

   When he came out with only a towel, I got hard immediately.  It was
poking out through the fly in my boxers.

   "No time for that."  He smiled.  "Get dressed, we're going down to
the marina.  A friend of mine is taking his boat today, let's go."

   "Alright, but we have to make a quick stop in Santa Monica first.  I
gotta see what's up with Jason."

   Pulling into the parking lot of his apartment, I noticed a Range
Rover that I was sure I recognized.  A nagging suspicion started to
creep up my spine.

   As we entered the building I started to ring the buzzer but then
thought better of it.  I'd just let myself in with the key that Jason
had given me.

   On the way up in the elevator I felt my temper starting to flare.  I
was pretty sure what I'd find when I got up there, which was why I had
opted not to ring the buzzer on the way in.

   "What's up dude?  You look worried."

   "I don't yet.  Maybe nothing."

   Nick was close on my heels as I approached Jason's door.  Unlocking
the door and walking into apartment I didn't see anyone at first.
Then, my worst suspicion was confirmed.

   There stood Jorge, pulling on his shirt, looking very surprised.
His hair a little longer than I remembered.  I only noticed because it
was still wet.  I could heard the shower running in the bathroom.

   Jorge and I just stood there staring at each other.  I could hardly
believe it.  He had seemingly vanished from the face of the earth for
the last six months and now I find him here.  Unbelievable.

   Finally, Nick cleared his throat audibly from somewhere behind me
breaking the silence.

   "How's it going?"  Jorge said, now perfectly composed and cordial as
is his general habit.

   I couldn't think of what to say, I was so pissed.  I felt hot,
angry, humiliated.  My head felt thick and there was a thin buzzing in
my ears which were starting to burn now.

   "Not bad."  Nick said, suddenly right by my side.  "Jason around?"

   "He'll be out in a minute, I think."  Jorge said, never taking his
eyes from mine.

   My jaw clenched tight and I felt an intense rage wash over me as I
took a step forward.  All I could see was my fist smashing into his
face, pummeling it until I just couldn't anymore.  Then my hands around
his throat, choking the life out of him.  This wasn't going to end
well, for any of us.  Just then I felt Nick's grip on my upper arm.

   "Alright, well tell him we just stopped by to see if he wanted to go
down to the marina.  Perhaps another time, eh."  Nick said, gripping my
arm tighter, preventing me from moving any closer to Jorge.

   Faster than I could think, Nick was ushering me back toward the door
and out into the hall.  Before I knew it we were back in the parking
lot.

   "Give me the keys."  Nick demanded.

   By the time we got to the marina I wasn't sure what I was feeling.
I just felt really numb and stupid.

   "What the fuck just happened?"

   "Man, I just thought I should get you out of there."  Nick said.
"That look on your face, well it was kinda scary.  Like you snapped or
something.  Hell, I'm still a little scared of you."

   "No, I mean what the fuck was he doing there?  I thought he hated
Jason.  We broke up because of Jason."

   "Dude, I don't know, man."

   We sat there in the Jeep for a little while longer.

   "Come on dude, this'll be fun."  Nick said getting out of the Jeep.
"We'll have a really good time today."

   I only vaguely noticed that the boat Nick had mentioned turned out
to be a fairly huge yacht.

   "Hey, hey.  Where's the bar?"  Nick said to his friend, who's name I
didn't catch.  "We could use a drink."

   My mood lightened a little as my buzz set in.  And there were quite
a few people on board, so no one really noticed my sullen mood, except
Nick.  I felt him watching me constantly.  I got pretty hammered and
fortunately I've never been an angry drunk, so everything was cool.

   It was pretty late when we got back to my house.  However, I wasn't
at all surprised to find Jason there when we walked in.

   "I'm going to bed."  Nick said, eyeing me closely.  "You gonna be
alright?"

   "Sure."

   Nick went into my room and closed the door.  I sat down behind my
desk and just sort of glared at Jason.

   "Dude, I'm sorry."  He said.  "I don't know what else to say."

   I didn't say anything.  Just looked at him.  I wanted to choose my
words carefully, so as to inflict the maximum amount of pain.  But I
didn't have the energy for all that.  Besides, my anger had waned into
something like apathy.

   "What the fuck dude?"  I asked.  "Why?"

   "I don't know man.  I just ran into him one day and it just kinda
happened."

   "Are you fucking kidding me?  You sound like some kinda fucking soap
opera."

   I just shook my head.  I would've laughed if the situation hadn't
been so sadly pathetic.

   "You know the worst part is that you betrayed me, my trust."  I
said.  "I don't care that you fucked him, you can't really help who
you're attracted to.  But you kept it from me.  And you kept it from me
because you knew what you were doing was wrong.  You humiliated me.
You made me feel like a fool."

   "I'm sorry."  Jason apologized, looking sadder than I think I've
ever seen him.

   "Me too."

   There was a long silence.

   "So what, are we enemies now?"  He asked.

   "No, we're just not friends anymore."

   Now he just stared at me, slack jawed.  He actually started to get
all misty eyed which just made me want to punch his skull in.

   "I think you better go now."  I said, getting up and heading toward
my bedroom.  "Oh and call your father, he's been trying to reach you."

   Nick was still awake when I climbed into bed next to him.

   "You okay?"  He asked.

   "Yep."

   "Wanna talk about it?"

   "Nope, not really."

   I felt like shit and I wanted to beat the hell out of somebody or
something.  But then Nick curled up behind me, put his arms around me
and began to stroke my head.  Soon the tension started to subside and
for once, I think I fell asleep before he did.

   ---

   On Monday morning, I woke early as usual and Nick slept late.  When
the buzzer rang I went down to find Scott waiting at the front gate.

   "So what's the deal, Craig?"  Scott said as I let him in and ushered
him up the stairs.  "I've left you two messages and you haven't
bothered to get back to me."

   "Sorry man, I've been a little busy."

   "Are you working on a new project?"

   "Well, sort of."  I answered.

   After offering him some coffee, I sat down at behind my desk.

   "So listen, how much do you know about the Linux operating system?"
Scott asked.  "Because we've got a new project coming up and I could
use your help."

   Before I could answer, the door to the bathroom swung open and out
walked Nick, fully dress, wearing his jeans and one of my Berkeley
sweatshirts.  I had forgotten that he was here.

   My breath caught in my chest as my eyes darted across the room and
focused on him, which of course made Scott turn and look to see what I
was staring at.

   He took a few tentative steps into the room before noticing Scott
and I.

   "Hey, how's it going?"  Nick nodded.

   "Hi."  Scott nodded back, slowly returning his gaze to me.

   Dumbfounded, my eyes shifted back and forth between Scott and Nick.

   "Thanks for the use of the facilities Craig.  I've got to get
going."  Nick said.

   "Oh, Scott this is Nick."  I introduced them.  "Nick, Scott."

   I felt like I'd just been caught doing something wrong.  I'm pretty
sure I was acting like it too.

   "Nice to meet you."  Scott said.

   "Same here."  Nick smiled.

   "Okay, gotta run.  Thanks again Craig."  Nick said.

   "Alright, catch you later."  I said to Nick as he headed out the
door.

   The awkwardness of the moment seemed to linger or perhaps it was
just me, but the way Scott was staring at me, not saying anything made
it worse.

   "You were saying?"  I said, clearing my throat.  "About the Linux
project."

   Scott stared for a moment longer, blinking rapidly with a slack
jawed look on his face.

   "Oh, yeah, right, the project."  He said, snapping out of his
stupor.  "So, you interested?"

   "Sure, sounds like fun."  I said.

   Almost immediately after Scott left, the phone rings and its Marc
wanting to get together.

   "Listen Marc.  I don't think that's a good idea.  In fact, I don't
think we should see each other at all anymore."  I told him.

   "Whoa, whoa, where's all this coming from Craig?  Why don't we just
talk about it?  I'm right near your place anyway."

   "I don't think so, Marc."

   "Come on, Craig, I'm pulling into your drive as we speak."  Marc
said.  "Let's at least talk, alright?"

   Before I knew what was happening, Marc was bent over the sofa and I
was drilling his ass, hard.  It was over in just a few minutes and he
was on his way out the door, happy as a clam and fully satisfied that
he'd gotten what he came for.  And I was left feeling extremely guilty.
What was I thinking?

   ---

   Nick didn't return until later the next day and he didn't seem quite
himself.

   "My dad's not well."  He said.  "I've got to go up to Santa Barbara
and see about him."

   "That sucks man, is there anything I can do?"  I asked
sympathetically.

   "No, not really.  I just have to go up and see what's going on with
him."

   "Well, what's wrong with him?"

   "I'm not sure, I only spoke briefly with his girlfriend."  He
replied.  "She didn't give any details, just relayed messages."

   "You want me to come with?"

   "No, that's not necessary.  I don't plan to be there very long."
Nick said.  "We don't really get along very well."

   "Okay, well.  When are you going?"

   "Right now.  I just wanted to tell you that I was going."  Nick
said.

   "Well, alright."  I said.  "But listen, I want you to call me if you
need anything or whatever.  Hell, call me anyway and let me know how
things are going, okay?"

   "Okay, I'll call you when I get there."  Nick said, turning to go.

   I stopped him and hugged him briefly before he went out the door.  I
wanted to say something else, but there was nothing else to say.  I can
be such a sap at times.

   In the meantime I started on the new project with Scott, but not
even that was enough to keep me from constantly thinking about Nick and
how he was doing.  He had called when he got to his father's house, but
that was days ago.  I haven't heard a word since then.

   With the project well under way, I started going back into the
office at Scott's company.  I needed the distraction.  Over lunch Scott
and I discussed work and possible plans for our next camping trip.  And
even though the rafting had gone well, we decided not to do that on our
next trip.

   "So, you gonna invite your buddy Nick?"

   I sensed a deeper question in Scott's tone.  He seemed to be
watching me for a reaction.

   "I don't know."  I answered.  "I suppose I can ask him if you want."

   "No, I just thought maybe you'd like to invite him."

   "Well, are we bringing other people?"  I asked casually.  "Cause if
we're not going to be rafting this time, I think maybe they'll all get
pretty restless.  Probably be a lot of complaining."

   I purposely steered the conversation away from the topic of Nick.  I
could see the frustration in Scott's eyes at having been sidetracked.
He tried a different approach.

   "So where do you know him from?"

   "Who, Nick?"

   "Yeah."

   "I don't know.  I suppose we have some friends in common."  I
shrugged.

   I could see there was no derailing this line of questioning and it
was clear where it was headed.  I really had no problem sharing the
truth with Scott, I just didn't want to see that wall go up between us.
That wall that sometimes goes up between people when one of them finds
out something about the other that they don't quite understand or
really didn't want to know, but just had to ask.

   Scott looked away for a moment then back at me.  His eyes searching
my face.

   "You could have told me, you know."

   "Told you what?"

   "That you have a boyfriend."

   My heart leapt into my throat.  I thought for a moment that I was
having a stroke.  Then I looked around to see if anyone had overheard
him.  Then I looked back at him.

   "What?"  I asked.

   "You and Nick."  Scott said casually sipping his drink.  "Its cool.
I don't care about that.  I just want you to stop acting all weird
around me.  You know what I mean?"

   "Weird?"

   "Yeah, I mean like we don't hang out anymore.  And when we do you're
all evasive and short with me.  And you've got this whole twitchy,
fidgety thing going on lately.  You know, weird."

   "How do you know its not a girlfriend?"

   "I didn't until just now."  Scott smiled.  "Its cool though.  I had
a boyfriend once.  Well, not actually.  We were more like fuck buddies,
you know."

   "Does Julia know?"

   "Nah, that's not the kind of thing you tell your wife.  Especially
if you plan to stay married to her.  Besides, this was way before I met
her."

   I started to relax and breath a little easier.

   "So believe me when I tell you, I can understand your reluctance to
share that kind of information.  But don't worry, your secret's safe
with me."  Scott winked.

   "So what happened?"  I asked.

   "I don't know.  I guess I kinda got over it when he started wanting
to fuck me back.  It just wasn't for me."

   "And now?  I mean since then?"

   "No, it was just something to do at the time.  Something to try,
kinda like playing golf.  I tried it a few times, and while I can
appreciate the game, I find it mind numbingly boring.  Its just not for
me."

   "Fair enough."  I chuckled.

   "So, you think you can quit acting like such a freak?"  Scott
grinned.

   "I'll give it a shot."  I laughed.  "No guarantees."

   "I gotta tell you though, a couple of those girls that Julia set you
up with are still waiting by the phone for you to call them back."
Scott confided.

   "Yeah well, I just might do that, you never know."  I shrugged.

   "Apparently, you're quite the Casanova.  You seem to have developed
your own little cult following among Julia's girlfriends.  Personally,
I don't see it."  He laughed.  "And you know she's gonna keep trying to
set you up.  She just can't stand to see anybody single."

   Then after a momentary pause in the conversation in which Scott
seemed to be studying me, pondering a further question, he spoke again.

   "So, is it serious?"  He asked.  "You and Nick?"

   "I don't know dude."  I said, suddenly feeling a little embarrassed
and self-conscious.  "We're just friends, more or less."

   Mercifully, my cell phone began to ring.

   "Hello?"

   "Hey Craig, its me.  I just called to let you know that I'm going to
be here for a while longer."  Nick said.

   His voice was distressed and sullen.

   "Is everything alright?"

   "Well, its my father.  He died.  And well, there're some things that
need attending to."

   "Oh shit, dude I'm sorry.  Is there anything I can do?  Anything you
need?"

   Scott's eyes were locked onto mine as I spoke into the phone, so I
got up and walked a little distance from the table.

   "No, there's really nothing."

   "Listen, I'm coming up there."

   "Oh, you don't have to do that."

   "Dude, I'm coming and that's all there is to it!"  I said
emphatically.

   Nick conceded and gave me directions.

   "I'll see you real soon, okay?"

   "Alright."  Nick said.  "And Craig?"

   "Yeah?"

   "Thanks man."

   "You bet."

   When I sat back down, Scott was wide eyed with curiosity.

   "Is everything alright?"

   "Uh, listen, I've got to take off for a few days."

   "Why, what's happened?"

   "That was Nick.  His dad just died so I'm going up to Santa Barbara
for the funeral."  I said.

   Scott was quiet for moment, then, "Oh, yeah, of course, you should
go."

   "I'll be back in a couple of days."  I said.

   After leaving the restaurant I stopped only briefly at home for some
provisions and got on the road immediately.

   On my arrival, I nearly didn't recognize Nick.  For whatever reason,
he'd cut his dark wavy hair down to a crew cut.  He greeted me warmly
but I could see the distress in his beautiful hazel eyes.  He looked so
sad that it made my heart hurt.  He stayed the night with me in my
hotel room and I did what I could to comfort him.

   Seems his father had been sick for quite some time but since they
hadn't spoken in many years Nick had been unaware.  He didn't go into
detail, except to say that they'd had a falling out.

   Nick's mother had gone back to live in Greece after she'd divorced
his dad years ago.  His older brother was en route from Miami and would
be arriving in the morning.

   The funeral was especially hard on him with his father's second wife
behaving so tragically.  The resemblance between Nick and his brother
was remarkable.

   After the funeral we started back right away.  When we got back Nick
stayed at my place and didn't even go out of the house for the next few
days.  I tried to take good care of him while still giving him enough
space.

   ---

   This whole business with Nick's father really put things into
perspective for me, so I made up with Jason.  It just didn't seem worth
it holding a grudge anymore.

   ---

   Eventually I convinced Nick to get out with me.  After watching a
special on the 'The Travel Channel' about the top ten best hotels in
Mexico, I decided that we'd go check a few of them out.  Hopefully, a
little time away from home would improve Nick's disposition.

   First stop on the tour of Mexican resorts was in Cancun.  The party
atmosphere was infectious and Nick seemed to start cheering up
immediately.

   Standing at the bar, doing shots in one of the various random clubs,
Nick seemed more like his old self.  He seemed happy and was smiling
again.  I was glad.

   "You've got very pretty eyes."  I over-heard the girl on the other
side of Nick saying to him.  "Come dance with me."

   She dragged him out on the dance floor and I didn't see him for
quite a while.  Nick seemed quite popular among the ladies, of course
that was no big surprise.  What did surprise me though, was how well he
moved on the dance floor.

   Watching him dance was really turning me on.  Nick can really dance.
He looked so fucking hot out there.  I couldn't take my eyes off his
undulating hips.

   Soon, I found myself out there as well.  Some hot little raven
haired beauty half danced with me, half danced with a cute little blond
girl who also divided her attention between a tall, handsome guy and my
brunette beauty.

   When my brunette turned her back to me and started grinding her butt
into my crotch, the blond moved in closer, smiling the whole time and
began to fondle her.  The tall guy was right behind her.

   Suddenly, when the girls locked lips, it was like something right
out of a 'Girls Gone Wild' video.  Then, from nowhere, tall guy reached
one hand over them and put his hand on my shoulder while still keeping
up with the beat of the music.  Then he began to stroke the back of my
neck with the girls still smooching and grinding between us.

   With my eyes locked on his, I began to fondle the dark haired girl's
breast.  She slowly moved my hands to her girlfriend's chest.

   Meanwhile, tall guy is grinding blond girl's butt and still stroking
my neck.  It was certainly getting hot in there.  Tall guy's eyes never
left mine the whole time.  No one else seemed to notice or even care
what was going on.  There were too many people doing their own thing to
care what we were up to.

   Eventually, our little dance floor quartet broke up and I headed
back over to bar.  Tall guy came over and bought a couple rounds of
shots for me and the girls.  It was far too noisy to hear anything
they were saying, so I just nodded and smiled as the girls giggled
while tall guy drank like a fish.

   It occurred to me that I hadn't seen Nick in quite a while, so I
decided to take a lap around the bar to see if I could spot him.  He
was no where to be found, so I stepped outside to get a breath of fresh
air.

   Outside the club I looked around to see if I could see Nick.  When I
turned back around tall guy was standing only a few inches from me.

   "How's it going?"  He slurred.

   "Pretty good."  I answered.  "Hey, thanks for the drinks."

   He assumed a bold stance as he stared down at me and cleared his
throat.  His eyes were glassy, but insistent and hungry.  I started to
feel a little anxiety-ridden by his close proximity.

   "No problem."  He said, gruffly.  "Do you wanna come back to the
room and party for a while?"

   He was standing so close to me that I could feel little drops of
spittle flying from his lips.

   I hadn't noticed before, but tall guys was a lot older than I had
previously thought.  And now, was he propositioning me?  Probably.  And
at any other time I might have accepted, but right now I needed to find
Nick.

   "No thanks, I'm gotta find my boyfriend."  I said.

   "Too bad.  The girls are gonna be disappointed."  He said.  "But if
you change your mind we're gonna be in room 333 at the hotel.  You can
bring your friend if you want."

   "Right."  I smiled.

   "Don't forget, 333."  Tall guy said, playfully clapping me on the
shoulder yet still staring at me.

   "Hey."  Nick said strolling up behind me.

   Tall guy walked away as soon as he spotted Nick.

   "Where the hell have you been?"  I asked, relieved to see him.

   "Oh, I had to walk some girls back to their room."  He said.

   "Dude, you could've said something."

   "Well, you were pretty busy out there on the dance floor."  He
smiled.  "That was quite a little show you and your new friends put
on."

   "Oh, you saw that, did you?"

   "Uh, yeah.  I'm pretty sure everyone saw that."  He chuckled.  "It
was kinda hot."

   We stood there quietly for a moment, watching the people come and
go.  Then Tall guy and the girls reappeared at the entrance of the
club.  We watched them as they looked around, then headed off toward
their hotel.

   Nick swatted me on the bottom, urging me on in the opposite
direction.

   "So?"  He said.  "Waiting for your boyfriend, huh?"

   "What were you, spying on me back there?" I asked as we walked.

   "So, I'm your boyfriend now, huh?"  He teased.

   "You are so fucking queer."  I laughed.

   "Ah yeah, I'm the queer one!"  He countered sarcastically.

   The rest of the trip was kind of a blurry haze as we hopped from
hotel to hotel, suite to suite, bar to bar, hitting nearly every major
resort town in Mexico.  Nick and I had a great time, partying all night
and lounging around various hotel pools during the day.  We fucked like
there was no tomorrow.

   There's something about vacation sex that makes it a little hotter.
Perhaps it's the different locale or more likely the availability of
secluded balconies.

   Once, a very surprised pool boy caught me sucking Nick off out by
the pool, behind a closed bar.  After a substantial tip, he asked if
there was anything that he could do.  We both laughed.

   Nick surprised me one day as we walked along a secluded beach.  He
took my hand in his while never breaking his stride.  I glanced over at
him.

   "Is this alright?"  He asked, indicating our clasped hands.

   I just smiled, giving his hand a strong squeeze and kept walking.
It was alright.  It was definitely alright.

   ---

   The day after we got back I was going through the huge stack of mail
on my desk when Jason came by.  He'd kept an eye on the place while
Nick and I were away.

   "So how was trip?"  Jason asked.

   "Pretty good, nothing special."

   Nick nodded a quick hello before heading out onto the deck.

   "Hey, I didn't know that you knew Marc Vincent."  Jason said as I
sorted through the pile on my desk.

   "What are you talking about?"

   "He called a couple of times while you were gone."  Jason said.

   "Oh yeah?  Any message?"

   "No message, he just said to tell you that he called."

   "Uh huh."  I answered distractedly as I came across a letter from an
attorney's office.  I didn't like the looks of it.  I got on the phone
to my lawyer immediately.

   "Alright, I'll catch you later."  Jason said on his way out the
door.  "Golf next week?"

   I nodded and waved as he went out, still waiting for someone to
answer on the other end of the phone.

   When I finally got through I was put on hold immediately.

   "Your friend said it was alright to come on up."

   Looking up from the papers in my hand, I was very surprised to find
Marc standing there before my desk.  My lawyer came on the line
simultaneously.

   "Is this a good time?"  Marc asked.

   I indicated that he should take a seat.

   "This is kind of an important call."  I said.  "I'll be with you in
a minute."

   "Take your time, no hurry."  Marc flashed a bright eyed smile.

   I was on the phone for quite some time trying to explain what was in
the letter and hoping to get some help as to what to do about it.

   My attention was suddenly divided between the voice on the phone and
the raised voices out on the deck.  I quickly scanned the room to see
where Marc was.  I didn't see him and suddenly I knew exactly what was
going on.

   All of a sudden, there was a loud crash.  I told my lawyer that I'd
have to call him back and quickly went toward the sound.  I got to
sliding doors that lead out onto the deck just in time to see Marc
swing at Nick, but Nick was too swift for him.

   Everything seemed to happen all at once.  Nick threw a solid punch
into Marc's midsection, which doubled him over.  While he was bent
down, Nick grabbed the back of his head and slammed it down hard on his
raised knee, three times in rapid succession.

   Marc crumpled onto the deck like a rag doll, blood flowing from his
face like a fount.  Looking like a Ninja, Nick stood ready to strike
again.

   "What the fuck!?"  I shouted.  "What the hell's going on out here?"

   "Your friend's got a smart mouth, so I shut it for him."  Nick
replied calmly.  So calmly in fact that it made me a little afraid of
him.

   Marc groaned a bit and rolled over onto his back.  There was blood
all over the front of him and the deck.

   "You alright?"  I asked, looking down at Marc.

   No answer.  He didn't even move.  So I leaned down a little closer.
His eyes were rolled up into the back of his head.  He was out cold.
Looking back and forth between Nick and Marc, I wasn't quite sure what
to do.

   "Dude, what happened?"  I asked Nick.

   "I just told you."  Nick said flatly and walked back inside.

   When Marc groaned again and started to sit up I helped him to his
feet.  He was very unsteady and pretty groggy.  I brought him into the
bathroom and tried to clean him up a bit, but his nose wouldn't stop
bleeding.

   "Listen man, it looks like I'm going to have to take him to the
hospital."  I told Nick.

   He just shrugged.

   Later that evening when I got back, Nick was still sitting in the
same spot.

   "You wanna tell me what really happened with you guys today?"  I
asked.

   "Not really."  He said.  "I don't wanna talk about it."

   "Well, he'd got a broken nose and a concussion."

   No response.

   "He wanted to have you arrested for assault and battery."  I said.
"Luckily I was able to talk him out of it."

   Still no response from Nick.  I just stared at him for a minute,
then decided to drop it.  I figured he'd tell me about it when he felt
like.  Or not.

   This was all my fault anyway.  What was I thinking?  Letting Marc
come into my house with Nick there.

   Marc hadn't given me much more information than Nick.  All he would
say was that Nick attacked him without provocation and that certainly
didn't sound right.  Hell, Marc often pissed me off just by being
himself.

   I poured us both a drink and sat down next to Nick on the sofa.  I
put my hand on his leg.  After a minute or so, he lay his head down in
my lap and I leaned down and kissed the side of his face.

   As he blinked his eyes I could see a tear drop across the bridge of
his nose.  This was one of those tender moments that I hate because
they tend to bind you emotionally to the other person.

   I don't care much for that feeling because inevitably it all falls
apart.  It would be easier to avoid it altogether by keeping my
distance.  But it was too late for that.  I was, in fact, already bound
to Nick from the moment that he dropped Marc on my deck.

   Even though Marc was the one who was hurt, I was more concerned for
Nick.  And a little turned on.  Indeed, I was bound to him even before
that.  I think it actually happened sometime ago, though I couldn't say
exactly when.

   I guess Nick harbored more hostility than he'd previously admitted
to concerning what had gone on between Marc and I.  And obviously, Marc
had said the wrong thing and pissed him off royally.  I don't suppose
I'll ever know what actually transpired between them.

   ---

   Standing under the strong spray of the shower head with my eyes
closed, I heard the door open and close behind me.  It could only be
Nick.  Just as I turned around and eyes, he let loose a strong torrent
of hot piss all over my crotch and stomach.

   "What the fuck?"  I said, visibly startled.

   "Okay, its official now."  He stated, golden stream still jetting
all over my midsection.

   "What are you doing?"  I asked, deeply intrigued now.

   "Marking my territory."  He answered, completely serious.

   A bark of laughter jumped from my mouth before I could stop it.  His
eyes now burning into mine, no trace of humor.  And as the stream
slowed to a trickle, then stopped, he pulled me to him and we kissed.

   Both our cocks hard as stone now, slipping and sliding between us.
Our hands groping for purchase on each other water slicked skin.  Nick
dug his teeth into my neck and I flinched.

   Then without warning, he spun me around, pushing his hard cock
between my thighs.  With him behind me now, I knew what he wanted and
before yesterday, before watching his physical confrontation with Marc,
I probably wouldn't have allowed it.  But the truth was, thinking about
it, seeing him take Marc out like that, really turned me on.  I'm not
sure why.

   With my face and hands against the cool tile wall in front of me, I
relished the feeling of his strong hard pecs against my back.  His
crotch pressed against my butt.  Involuntarily, I felt my hips pressing
back into him.  His hands caressing my chest, my nipples and stomach.
His lips and hot breath in my ear.  I couldn't stop the shudder that
wracked my body.

   As much as I hate the idea of being opened up like that, I couldn't
resist Nick.  I didn't want to.  And as much as I love plowing deep
inside another man's asshole, I don't much care to be on the receiving
end.  Nick would be only the third man on the planet to find his way
inside me.

   His fat cock was nudging its way between my hairy thighs.  I could
feel the large round head of his thick dick pressing at the back of my
balls.

   The sensation made me wiggle my backside at him and pull him closer
up behind me.  His hands still rubbing and grabbing all over me.  His
lips and tongue caressing every inch of my neck and ears.

   Feeling his hips buck against my bottom I begin to melt in his
strong grasp, as he grinds himself against me relentlessly.

   Then the moment that I had been dreading had finally come.  Nick
reached down between us and began positioning his monstrous cock for
entry.

   I think Nick was aware that I loved fucking him and so far he didn't
seem to object to it.  In fact, he seemed to enjoy it because I enjoyed
it, but now it was time for some reciprocity.

   He backed up a bit, pulling me with him and bent me forward
slightly, then took aim.  I held onto the wall and tried to relax.  I
wouldn't deny him this moment.  Both of us wet and horny, it took him
no time at all to find his target.

   In an instant, I felt Nick's hot, thick head pressing against my
opening.  I could hardly believe anything so huge could ever fit inside
me.  It just didn't seem possible, like trying to force a baseball bat
through a key hole, but I had to let him do it.

   Soon, there was the expected pressure and then more force.  And all
too soon, the searing pain as he breached my asshole.  I held my
forehead against the tile, gritted my teeth and allowed him to tear
into me.  The pain was acute, intense and blinding.  I felt my knees
buckle.

   Nick held me up with his strong hands, while slowly and relentlessly
pushing his massive rod deeper and deeper inside me.  It felt like a
giant, red hot, iron pipe sizzling and searing its way into me.  There
was a moment when I thought I'd be ripped in two, but then he stopped
and began to back out every so slightly.

   Again, he pressed forward and finally slid past the point where my
muscles could no longer fight against him.  All I could do now was
resist the urge to tighten up, that would be a huge mistake.

   Nick relaxed for a moment while I remained wedged wide open on the
end of his tremendous prong.  I wanted desperately to press down with
my muscles or pull myself off his big cock, but I just took a deep
breath, then shuddered a little while envisioning his beautiful eyes
staring into mine and tried to hang in there.

   He pressed further on and while he seemed to be able to slide in
more easily now the pressure and burning sensation hadn't eased one bit
for me.  The more of him that crept into me the hotter it felt.  The
pressure was tremendous and the pain was excruciating.  But I refused
to yell out.  I could a loud roaring, rushing sound in my ears and the
thudding of my heart seemed to be jarring my entire body.

   Then I felt his hands on my shoulders pulling me back toward him.
His strong arms encircling my body, my back to his chest.  I was about
to call him off, when the sensation of him pushing and pulling his
massive cock through my tightly stretched hole began to feel a little
less like a punishment.

   His hands found my waist and he flexed his hard, muscled body with a
rhythm seemed to lull my ass into a sort of acceptance. That massive
intruder between his legs was quickly becoming my friend.  Soon he was
sliding into me with a little more ease.  At times though, the length
and girth seemed more than I could bear, but the overall sensation of
him being inside me was either starting to feel really good or I was
losing consciousness.

   Nick pushed me forward again and my hands found the wall again.  He
now began pounding furiously into my tight butt.  His hands squeezing
my hip and his big thick cock plowing a new thoroughfare up my bottom.

   The first few slams were excruciating, then something inside me seem
to either snap or give way and just let go.  I simply surrendered to
him and I started wanting it more and more.

   My eyes watered involuntarily as I felt Nick ravaging my backside.
The sounds of wet slapping flesh seemed to drown out all else around
us.

   Finally, it started feeling really good and I was really getting
into it.  I reached down between my legs for my cock and was surprised
to find that it was already swollen and throbbing.  So I began to
stroke it.  An orgasm seemed to be building quickly in my balls.  They
had tightened up to my body and the pounding in my ass was definitely
going to make me blow my load soon.

   Suddenly, every nerve ending in my body seemed to ignite
simultaneously.  I was in sensory overload and with one violent shudder
I was suddenly shooting all over my hand.  The orgasm caught me be
surprise and shook me to the bone.  I could feel my ass gripping around
the fat cock with each shot of smoldering cum that I fired out the end
of my own cock.

   When Nick suddenly seized me and growled deep in his chest, I knew
he was unloading as well.  I could feel it.

   He pounded my backside for all he was worth and the grunts and
groans he made only heightened my sense of pleasure.  By now he had me
pinned against the wall and was holding onto me so tightly that I could
barely breathe.

   Finally, Nick relaxed his grip but still he didn't pull his long fat
cock out of me.  He just leaned on me and stroked my head with one hand
and kissed my ear in between deep, rasping breaths.

   When he finally did disentangle himself from me, he pulled me around
face to face with him and embraced me.  Then he just stared into my
eyes for a moment.

   "Just saying I love you really has nothing to do with meaning it."
Nick said.  "So I had to. . . needed to, show you."

   I had to suppress the urge to tell him that sex has nothing to do
with love either.  But I decided to just accept the sentiment and keep
my big fat mouth shut.

   I pulled him closer and we stood under the water in a tight embrace
for quite a while.

   Its funny how I don't get that same chemical reaction in my brain
when I'm on the receiving end.  That wild endorphin rush that usually
makes me feel all sappy and in love.  In fact, its quite the opposite.
I actually feel a little hostile afterward.

   When we finally got out, I was exhausted.  I wanted nothing more
than to take a nap, but I was already late for a meeting.  And there
was no putting it off.

   "How'd the meeting go?"  Nick asked when I got back.

   "Not good."

   "Why?  What happened?"

   "Apparently, I'm being sued."