Date: Sun, 13 Apr 2014 15:12:40 -0700 From: Tyler Waggoner Subject: A Family Made - Chapter 5 ** DONATE TO NIFTY *** Hey, PLEASE DONATE to Nifty. Every cent helps the site to keep being 'THE PLACE' for gay and alternative erotic stories. Make sure you find the donation link and information (NIFTY HOME PAGE) or cut and paste the following and launch it on your browser: http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html See how easy it is to contribute to this important site. ** DISCLAIMER** The following story is a work of fiction. It contains bisexual and homosexual themes of an erotic and explicit nature between adult men and teenage boys, if this offends you or is illegal for you to read, possess in electronic or printed form, please stop reading now. The views and opinions expressed by the characters are not necessarily those of the author. It is illegal for this document to be copied in any manner (paper/electronic), except for the enjoyment of the individual reader, or hosted on other websites, published, or be altered, changed, or utilized, without the expressed written consent of the author. The characters and the surrounding story in this work are the sole intellectual property of the author. Unprotected sexual acts are depicted -- if you choose to have unprotected sex, be aware of all the possible risks for both you and your partner, making sure your partner (partners) are informed, and be disease free and HIV negative. COPYRIGHT 2014; All rights reserved. ***** AUTHOR'S NOTE ***** I will be writing this story from different character's perspectives (I will let the reader know which character in my author's note, introducing the chapter ... sometimes I will need to do this within the chapter as well), to give reader's insight into each character -- what they are experiencing -- thinking -- as the story develops. I'm definitely open to suggestions on the story line, activities of the characters, etc., so do not hesitate to contact me, at TWag1983@hotmail.com. I want to THANK everyone who sent me emails. Some of you clearly just want to 'get off' and of course, there is nothing wrong with that. Other's enjoy the story and the relationships of the characters. I will try and convey all aspects. I like all of the positive and negative criticisms (this is new, but fun to me) -- I'm learning quite a bit. I hope you enjoy Chapter 5 of 'A Family Made'. Thanks, Tyler **** CHAPTER INTRODUCTION **** THIS CHAPTER starts from the perspective of Marc -- the lover of 14 year old, Lucas, a boy whose father Nik is an ex-Navy aviator, now an airline pilot -- Nik and Marc have been best friends since they were ten years old. It then switches to the perspective of Nik then back to the perspective of Marc as the chapter ends. I've had a bunch of email requesting more description of the house. So, I will include from time to time a description of a room where a scene takes place, so you can see how spectacular the house is. I will try and weave these descriptions in, prior to a key scene. I will also continue to describe the look of a character as thoroughly as I can, but this will be as characters are introduced. *** NOTIFICATIONS LIST *** For those of you who want to be notified when my stories are released, just send an e-mail to TWag1983@hotmail.com, and I will send you a pdf version. ** IMAGES OF KEY CHARACTERS ** I have had a lot of emails asking if I have images that I used to compose the characters. I do -- lots of them. In some instances (the exception is the character of Nik of which there are two), several images were used. I am happy to email them, should anyone want a 'visual'. Realize, however, that I used them as a basis only -- these characters live in my mind. Just email (email address is above) and I will send them your way -- I know some people are visual, where others prefer a narrative, and still others are a confluence of the two. Enjoy Chapter 5. Tyler A Family Made -- Chapter 5 July 4th Weekend -- 2009 I watched as Lucas lay by the lake -- the gentle curves of his body accentuated by the hardness of the rough hewn wood of the dock -- the lines of his young body captivating me ... his soft, silky skin, lighted by the sun -- a beautiful pardo with a hint of bronze ... rich ... sensual ... pure ... flawless. Sunlight glinted off his dark, almost black, mahogany hair ... the complex depth revealing flecks of red ... deep ... lush -- the rays dancing off his supple curls, framed his pristine face -- his lips glistened, the oils of his lip balm liquifying ... enhancing the curves, texture and suppleness ... a deep ruddy pink. His cheeks dusted with soft rose. His belly delicately scalloped into his narrow waist, accenting his teenage appendage ... prominently profiled as it lay on his treasure trail ... his balls resting against the hardness of the wood. His beautiful legs slightly separated, toes gently twitching from time to time as the breeze hugged him ... I loved all of Nikky ... how his 2nd toe was longer than his rounded big toe and middle toe ... his feet, powerful but delicate. I watched as his head moved gently ... timed with the rhythm ... ear buds in place ... bright blue ipod by his side ... "The Coverband -- 'Love Takes Over' " crisply displayed on the screen -- his beautiful eyes ... lush eyelashes, kissing ... closed. I couldn't believe our last year ... falling madly in love with this angelic being. I lost the guilt ... the feeling of absconding his innocence .... Summer took hold in the Northwest ... my new life ... Nikky, its central core. All of the feelings ... coerced into the depths of my mind, now flooding out -- I had been in love with Nik ... no ... still in love with Nik -- I had suppressed those emotions, knowing I needed to be 'normal' ... finding Julia so innocently beautiful ... crashing; her pregnant with twins ... determined that we would make a family. She became my soulmate ... essential in everything ... my rock ... my solace when life breathed fire. Then ... malevolently thrust out of my life ... my soulmate ripped from my being ... helpless ... empty. The only reason for relocating the family to Seattle was Nik. Boeing was just the excuse I used; I couldn't be apart from him. Sofia and Julianna ... Jesse and Nikky ... best friends ... as Nik and I are ... the crescendo of our lives. Seeing our families meld ... spouses laughing .... children playing ... it all was so good ... so special ... so magical. Sofia was now plotting with Julianna to spend a year in Paris at The Sorbonne. I had watched as Nikky went from a compact slight-framed boy, into, willowy pubescence ... now ... filling into spectacular perfection -- his face so amazing ... so awesomely beautiful -- his eyes ... stunningly captivating windows. Every time I looked in, I could see Nik ... all of the feelings, intense emotions, surfaced -- when I looked past Nik, I saw an alluring soul ... a flame that reignited mine ... intensely burning ... fusing me with him. Nikky and I were in the garage. He standing on a stool facing my workbench; me behind, supporting his arm as he used the air drill to tighten the bolts on his skateboard. It was nothing really, just a typical summer afternoon. Jesse and Lucas had bought these boards at a consignment shop; building a half-pipe, near the pool house. They lived out there, doing all kinds of maneuvers -- kickflips, heelflips, tailslides ... Jesse was a Regular Foot (riding with his left foot leading), Nikky a Goofy-Foot (riding with his right foot leading) -- yinyang. Jesse had noticed that one of Nikky's bolts was coming loose; they called me to see if I could help. Jesse continued to practice inward heelflips while Nikky and I went around the house into the garage. My heart jumped remembering the electricity as I stood behind him ... his sensuous globes ... pelvis arching backward ... my sceptre engorging, rapidly expanding in my shorts ... straining against him. The current, intense, as my hands slowly moved to his forearms and then engulfing his delicate hands. Trembling. Terrified of what was happening .... spiraling ... unable to control my body. The heat as my face flushed ... the warmth of his body as he slowly turned to face me ... the intoxicating smell of ... him ... as I looked down into his deep blue eyes, my arms encircling him as he pushed into my manhood. The delicate softness of his lips as he touched my head .... my wetness jumping onto his tongue ... the velvety richness of his ingress .... I was so scared, so fucking scared as he settled below me, his knees on the stool, his arms around my massive thighs. I stopped. I pulled back. I put my throbbing member back in my shorts and fled ... back to the safety of the house. Nikky and I were spending more time together ... under the auspices of Jesse's coaching his swimming. Nikky wanting more of my meat ... a visceral ache every time we were together ... Nikky learning how to please me ... the fear, omniscient, of being caught. Then, the time in my bedroom ... Lucas was thirteen ... when he told me he had thought a lot about 'butt' fucking ... he wanted me ... he wanted me deep inside him. I was so taken by him ... so enamoured with him. He worked, learning how to open himself ... explaining how he used the 'toys' I had bought him ... his bud opening for my fingers as I would drink the sweetness of his adolescence. The first night ... the bone chilling cold drawing against the house ... the warmth of the fire, the flickering of the candles ... Nikky tenderly opening to me ... his spectacular beauty, radiating, as my seed filled him ... my essence merging with him ... making this wonderful boy ... mine. I could hear the distant sound of gravel -- it had to be Nik. My heart skipped ... I couldn't be flushed and bothered ... NO ... I was going to calmly walk to the house ... then inside ... then through the kitchen ... then the hallway ... and then into the foyer ... with NOT the slightest hint ... that my best friend's son was mine -- that the smell of our breeding admixed with the sweetness of his adolescence cohering, heavy in our bedroom. NO -- Nik wouldn't know. That morning, Nikky had carefully moved his things into a guest room that was adjacent to the master suite ... arranging things to appear as though he had been in that room, the whole time. As if he were arranging a set, he had moved a bar of soap, smearing the residue over the dish in the shower ... walking through the bathroom, disheveling rugs, touching the mirror with his nose in several places, spraying the shower with water (and a bit of shower gel) ... placing the moist bath towel, carelessly, through the holder. The bed, which we had rolled in several times during the week -- careful not to do anything that would stain -- lie made ... a clue to Lucas's extreme neatness and order. He had even put a glass of water by the bedside making sure rings were superimposed ... slowly drying as if he had slept there for several nights -- Nikky slept on the right side. NO -- Nik would not know. I ducked into the kitchen, picking up a glass of water that I had left on the counter. I heard the door chime, ring, as Nik stood outside. I left the kitchen, walking through the dining room, then out through the hallway past the living room and into the foyer. I could see Nik's profile through the frosted glass. I opened the door, stepping onto the portico while opening my arms. Nik gave me a tight hug. He was so adorable ... his boyishly chiseled face with a toothy bright smile. He smelled wonderfully fresh ... the hint of Bvlgari on his neck. "Hey buddy", I said as I pulled his gym bag from his arm, stepping inside, "glad you made it!". "Yeah", he said behind me as I heard the door close, "it was a pleasant ride.", he said, "gorgeously clear day!". "Yeah", I said as I led him down the hall, then up the stairs, "it's been all sun and cool breezes", as I walked down the hall, turning just past the library, into the smaller master bedroom, just down the hall from the solarium. I walked over to the foot of the king sized bed, putting his gym back down on the long padded bench that sat just beneath. I turned around to Nik. "Glad you're here", I said as I walked by him, brushing my hand along the fullness of his bicep. "Can I get you anything?", I asked, as Nik casually placed his hand on my chest, giving it a small push. "No", he said, "I think I'm good". Then I heard him following me across the room to the door. "Where's Lucas", he said as I entered the hallway. Smiling I said, "he is on the dock, down by the lake, taking in the sun". Nik, smiled, then said, "Hey Marc, can we go into the library?", he paused, then said, "I've got something I need discuss with you". I smiled, and said, "sure buddy", as he walked down the hall, past the grandfather's clock, turning right ... entering the library. ******* (Now, the narrative switches to Nik) ******* Marc continued into the room, now, directly in front of me. I watched as he slowly approached the love seat, nearest us. The library was a much larger room than I remember. The entry placed you at one end of the room, facing the spectacular mountain view. All of the rooms on the first and second floors had 14' ceilings ... giving a feeling of space that was palatial. The floor was ebony Dalbergia malenoxylon (known as the African Blackwood) from the Sawahili region of Southeast Africa ... artfully at a 30 degree angle -- a mix of short and long planks, the brilliance of glossy sheen enhancing the grain. The walls, ribboned Vanimo Viscose silk -- framed by ornate white 1' base shoes and sloping crown moulding , the ceiling a bluish white accentuated by whiter framed moulding ... large panels ... with recessed lighting. The large framed double-hung picture windows looking out over the mountains, the framing interrupted by corner blocks, the jambs brightly illuminated by the afternoon light -- they filled the entire wall, so that when you stepped into the library the mountains filled your view. The fireplace was the center piece of the back wall, the acanthus leaf decor of the white marble, accentuating the depth and the roughness of the hearth and massiveness of the firebox, with its arched ceiling. Etched glass sconces were on either side of the mantel -- a beveled glass mirror with a wide, thick, ornate gold guild frame was positioned above, adding depth to the room. Beautiful guilded oils depicting mountain scenes were placed, artfully, smattering the walls. Two identical George II Wingback Chairs ( their surface, silk ... smooth robin blue ribbons with fine gold confines, cut downward, finely stitched against a background of creamed silk, which, revealed intricately weaved, delicate scenes of the mountains as you moved toward it ... the light revealing the scenes hidden within ), were on either side of the fireplace ... next to each were dark cherry, square, pedestal tables with inlays of precious woods from around the world. The wall to the left of the entry door and the wall holding the entry door were covered with floor to ceiling bookshelves. Finely bound leather works were displayed, with sculpted glass and stone art sprinkled among them. In the middle of the room, two simple loveseats covered in Damask silk, a pretty cream, faced each other ... each angled near a sleighback armchair, the glossy dark Jatoba Brazilian Cherry grain framed the patina of dark carmel aniline full-grain leather. In between the chairs and the loveseats were rounded ornate Koa wood end tables, with African rosewood trim, supported by a single pedestal -- the pedestal had a wider center ... carved pineapple with its flared apex ... its four base legs rounded out to meet the floor. A Chinese, blue eggshell, teajar, lamp, with brilliant white octagonal bell lampshade adorned each table -- a dark bronzed pineapple bauble protruded above the lampshade. In the center of the conversational area was a beautiful creamed and silver persian rug with intricate brilliant blues, golds and cherry ... drawing all of the room's colors inward -- as you moved from one side of the rug to the other, the appearance and intensity of the colors changed. The whole room -- Julia -- her impeccable tastes, exuded. The fragrance of fine leather was softened by the pleasantness of orange oil, with a subtle hint of eucalyptus. As I looked around the room, I felt a surge of ANGER ... FIRE ... erupted from my core. I tried to suppress my feelings but I couldn't ... like magma, the pressure in my gut ... building ... my nostrils flared with the smoke of my anger. " I " " Know " my words cutting, monotone, firm. Marc turned toward me, the recognition divulged in his face, " I'm not sure I'm following you buddy ", Marc's light tone shrouding him. "You know EXACTLY what I FUCKING mean", I venomously spewed, "YOU FUCKING KNOW WHAT I MEAN!". The words reverberated off the marble of the mantle. My eyes ... fire .... the entirety of my body, arching in offense .... Marc turning toward me ... " HOW could you FUCKING take my BABY ? ", the anger dripping, " FUCK him! ... ", I paused, I was so pissed. "FUCK him! .... OVER and OVER ... HE'S FOURTEEN!! ". Marc's body tensed, the involuntary movement of his larynx revealing, " you saw ", " ... US ", enunciating as in 'we' ... " When? ", his voice changing, inquisitive, his eyes searching me. " Last night ", my eyes didn't move as I stared him down, " from the windows ", I said as I moved toward him. I SURGED forward ... my body grabbing the muscular frame ... Marc and I rolling to the floor. "YOUR MY FUCKING BEST FRIEND! ", I screamed, My arm rising back, my hand clenched ... fist formed, posed to strike ... I felt the power of Marc's arm as he grabbed mine, just as my hand swung down -- inches from his face. I was violently thrown off to the side toward the bookcases. He lurched as I lunged back at him. We rolled back toward the loveseats ... Marc underneath me, my hand coming at him ... his hand deflecting ... pushing me toward the fireplace ... me getting on my feet, lunging for him ... our bodies twisting as we hit the floor, again rolling toward the fireplace. His hands now grabbing my arms ... my face glowing with anger ... I was gasping, chest heaving with each breath ... Marc now straddling my legs with his powerful trunks, pinning me to the hard floor. He was holding my arms up, planted on each side of me ... the weight of his body on mine, full. His eyes burrowed into me ... his stare so intense I felt him inside me. His breath ... hot ... against my face, his body weighing on mine. "DON'T EVER ", he growled, " EVER ", his voice against my face, " HIT ME ". His hands tightened around my arms. The strength of his massive form, keeping me from moving. We lay there, panting, the heat of my anger searing ... his, burning on top of me. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' .... the grandfather clock, marking time. " I'm your best friend ", he evenly said, his breathing normalizing. I could feel his manhood grow between us ... my cock responding ... now pressing back ... tight. " I've always loved you ", I heard Marc, his eyes looking into me, " ... I've always loved you so fucking much ... I just didn't know how much", he was saying, my breathing now calming. We lay there, our breathing slowing until, we were in unison. I felt his body relaxing, loosening his grip on me ... my body free ... him rolling onto his back. I lay there ... looking at the panels on the ceiling. My thoughts ... whirling ... uncontrollable. I loved my son so much. I loved Marc so much. I couldn't deny the passion I had witnessed last night. I couldn't deny that my best friend and my boy had made love ... love, like I wanted ... longed for. Finally, I said softly, " and, I love you ". We lay there. I then heard Marc stir, then his frame slowly rise ... towering over mine. I saw him reach down with this hand ... I grabbed his hand and he righted me. His hand remained in mine ... then, slowly, he let it slip out. " Why? ", I looked into his eyes, " Why? ", I breathed, "why Lucas?". Marc moved into me, his massive hand against my left cheek, his huge thumb gently brushed over my lips. His eyes, moist. Marc slowly withdrew. He walked toward the George II Wingback Chair, on the left side of the fireplace. His breathing now heavy ... his feet ... straining to move his weight, as he crossed the room. I followed until his back, a wall in front of me. "do you know why he loves languages? ", I softly said, the words echoing off the wall. Marc paused ... then, slowly shook his head. "because he loves 'the intermingled musical complexities, and form, of human speech' ", I stated ... quietly ... deliberately. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' "do you know why he loves to sculpt ?" , I asked, softly. Marc, slowly shook his head. "he loves capturing the 'intricate expressions of three dimensional human experience' ", slowly, allowing my words to reverberate off Marc's towering frame. " he listens to Mozart when he's sculpting ", I continued, pausing ... " instrumental jazz when he's painting ", I quietly said. " he loves The Rolling Stones, Aerosmith, Bon Jovi", I said, "Gershwin ... he adores Gershwin". 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' ... "did you know he can play anything on the piano ... after hearing it once ... with the perfect intonations of the original ", I said. Marc turned around to face me ... his face showing how amazed he was ... his head turning from side to side. " no ", his voice low, " I did not ", I saw Marc's lips move ... his voice, hoarse. Marc paused. His head slowly cocked to the side, " why? ... why doesn't he play? ". " because ", I said, " he only spends his time on things that challenge him ", I said softly, " sometimes I find him down in the living room, playing something he's heard, his voice in harmony ", I continued, " ... he has an awesome voice", I smiled, " when he's not in the throws of puberty ". I could see Marc's smile. " but, it is rare ... he'd rather paint or sculpt ... or reach another competitive goal" Then, Marc's face became deathly serious ... his eyes reflective. " Nik ", Marc's voice now a raspy breath, " I love Nikky ". The words jumped into me, my chest tightened, then relaxed, my senses sentient. Marc's whole body expressively changed ... he softened ... shrinking before me ... the tenderness in his voice, the expansion of his pupils, the complete loosening of his tautness. " I know ", the words mere breaths escaping my lips. I stared intensely into Marc's eyes ... watching every flicker, every subtle twitch of his eyelashes. Marc fell into the arm chair, his mass thudding ... the chair slid, surprised. Marc's body limp. The raspiness of his voice, graveled out, " I love him more than I have ever loved ". His eyes staring into a void, unrecognizing of me, now standing in front of him. I had never seen my best friend so vulnerable, so open, so raw, as ... now. Even when we had talked about Julia, knowing how close they were ... how inseparable ... even when we talked about the grief he was living, the naked emotion flowing as he sobbed -- away from his kids, away from his friends ... except me. I spent hours consoling him -- holding him in my arms -- his chest heaving, as deep sobs overtook him ... his soul pining for his mate. I knew then that I loved Marc more than I did anyone else ... his desolate heartache, mine. Marc looked up at me, his eyes tearing, his lip quivering as he said, " so intensely it burns inside me .... so intensely that I can't focus ... so intensely .... ", his voice shaky, " more intense than you ... ", " ... more intense than my kids ...", his voice jerked, deepened, gravely heavy, "more than .... Julia ", he began to heave, his body folding, his head in his massive hands. I went up to my best friend, putting my hand on his head, moving to stand beside him, drawing his head into me. He continued for awhile ... then ... I could feel him settle ... me gently rubbing his hair. Marc, slowly rose. His arm drawing me close to him. I felt his lips on mine ... my body against his ... lips pressed equally into each other. We kissed, deeply, my body sensing all of him. Then we both slowly moved out, looking into each others eyes. " I love you Nik ", Marc said, " I never meant for this to happen so fast, or for me to", he sighed, " hurt you". I didn't break my connection, looking, my eye's softening, I replied, " I love you Marc " .... " I didn't realize how much ". Slowly he led me to the love seat ... sitting ... me sitting next to him. I put my arm behind him, turning slightly so I could see my best friend's face, my hand absently playing on his neck. " What do we do? ", I said, as Marc looked into my eyes. " I don't know ... ", Marc said, his voice cracking, " I don't know ", he said. We looked at each other for a long time. I could hear the distant sound of the grandfather clock in the hall ... 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' .... I could see the light shifting, as the sunlight became more intense. " Rafaela ", I said, my hand now on the back of Marc's head, gently fingering his hair, my thumb brushing against his ear, " there is no way Rafaela would every let this go on ". Marc looked into my eyes, then his pupils constricted .... he, slowly said, " she can never know ". He paused, " she'd have me arrested ... I'd lose Jesse ... lose everything ....", his body shook ... a deep tremble. Then he looked into my eyes, his soul erupting, " Nikky ", his lip quivered, "Nikky ", his eyes wandering into voidness, " I'd lose him .... Nikky ". I could see his whole countenance, collapse ... I continued to gently slide my fingers through his hair, his head leaning toward me ... me, moving until his head was resting on my bicep ... my hand moving around, cupping his head, my thumb absently rubbing along his cheek .... " We have to keep it between you and Lucas ", I resolutely said, " if Rafaela every suspects anything, I will have to move us". 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' ... the distant sound of the clock ... " Maybe re-base in London or Miami", I said, "someplace where Lucas is protected until he's old enough to go back to you". .... then slowly, very slowly, the muscles along his angular jaw ... tightened ... Then, a coldness filled the room ... Marc sat up ... his entire body turned to face me ... his eye's piercing .... " THAT will NEVER happen", the tone in his voice changed ... his body becoming fuller, bigger, " I will ... KILL ... anyone who threatens us ". I felt the icy cold deepen as his eye's changed, " anyone " ... I shivered ... I knew he would ... I knew Marc would stop anything or anybody that threatened what he cherished. I had never seen him this intense. " When there is BLACK ICE in the BASEMENT of HELL ", I heard Lucas's voice .... clear, crisp, even .... directly, behind us. I looked around ... Marc's head and body following .... shock molding his face, the blood draining. Lucas was standing in the doorway, bare feet on the floor ... just his Speedo ... his ear buds dangling absently around his neck ... "How long have you been here Nikky? ", Marc's voice, shaky. "Since you two walked through the door", Lucas replied, pausing, he added, "I came in through the solarium". " I don't think you have any say in this ", I stated, looking into his deep Pacific Blue eyes. " The hell I don't ", he said calmly, walking over then past me, " the hell I fucking don't " he mumbled as he moved, sitting next to Marc. Marc shifted, as Lucas buried his head, disappearing between Marc's chest and his massive arm. Lucas reached down, with his hand, placing it high on Marc's thigh ... his fingers disappearing between Marc's leg and pouch. Marc slid down, as Lucas nuzzled ... his supple leg now draped over Marc's. We sat there. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic', then the gears shifting, as 'Westminster Chimes" started playing, marking the hour. " I love Marc, Dad ", Lucas broke the silence .... 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' " I want to be his", Lucas slowly continued. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' , " to be ... totally ... his ", 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' , " ... forever ". 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' , the clock marking each moment, ''tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' " No one needs to know ", Lucas finally said. Shifting, he put his head on Marc's large pectoral. He looked from Marc to me and then back, his hand tracing Marc's chest .... Marc and I looked at each other, then back to Lucas. " I'm not stupid ", he softly said, " I'm more intelligent than anyone I know ". He lay on Marc's chest, his head rising with each of Marc's breaths. " Life will continue ", then his voice changed, "I know YOU can act, Dad", Lucas glanced up, " I knew ", he nuzzled into Marc, " all about Brandon ". The color drained from my face ... my mouth arid, parched. My vision blurred, then I could see clearly again. Marc slowly looked over at me. His eyes questioning ... his expression giving away his thoughts. " You loved him Dad ", Lucas softly said, " you loved him very, very much ". 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' " I haven't seen you more happy ", Lucas finally spoke. I looked into Lucas. There was no malice, no judgement, just his knowing. He looked ... back ... into me .... my heart skipped. " I love you Dad ", my boy's voice ... louder ... " no matter what ...". I bent over, my lips kissing his forehead, my left hand reaching over to gently cup his face, " I love you baby ". My hand lingered, then slowly I moved back. Lucas shifted, looking into Marc's eyes, " and you ", his body moving, his leg pushing off, his foot now on the floor, leaning up on the love seat, " you are going to do as we talked about ... many, many times ", his look softening. "There is no way anyone suspects anything", Lucas continued, "and if everyone will keep their heads screwed on correctly, particularly the emotional outbursts", Lucas looked from Marc to me, "then we should have the time to live our lives without somebody quashing us before we have a chance to matter", Lucas looked at Marc, his smile so tender, his eyes dancing. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' ... Westminster Chimes sounding the half hour ... Then, he said, " I will tell Jesse ...everything ", his voice trailing as he said, " He should hear this from me", as he paused, " he's my best friend ... we share everything ... he needs to hear it from me". We sat there, the silence punctuated by 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' "We have all weekend to figure things out, and I expect the men in my life", Lucas looked at Marc then at me, "to be men and suck it up", pausing, "so you and I can be happy", Lucas looked sweetly into Marc's eyes. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' Lucas, slowly rose. He bent forward, meeting Marc's lips, and kissed him deeply. I could see his adolescent appendage tighten, the outline full, defined in his Speedo ... I could see my best friend, his manhood more obvious ... his large hand on the back of Lucas's head, slowly drifting down his back, then cupping his firm ass globe. Lucas then moved over to me, gently kissing me on the cheek -- his foot on mine -- his hand gently brushed my cheek. "You two have a lot to work out", he said, "and I have to get more sun". He then silently walked out of the room, toward the solarium. The silence was palpable ... 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' .... ******* (Now, the narrative switches to Marc) ******* "Who is Brandon? ", I said, looking over at Marc, putting a hand on his leg. "My lover ", Nik said, turning his head toward me, "We were together two years" ... he slowly put his hand on mine, "He was so caring, so special ... I .. I .. loved him", a large smile erupted, and Nik's eyes softened, his toothy smile refreshing, "I'm still in love with him". "How did it happen?", I said, wondering how this beautiful man, who loved his wife, with two strikingly beautiful children, had strayed. With a man, whoa ... this model-like stud .... wow .... I never suspected a thing. "Rafaela wasn't putting out", he reflected, his eyes narrowing, "and I needed physical attention", he said. I took my hand and shifted, so I could see him fully. My hand, holding my head. "I was driving, near the University, and I pulled into this bar", Nik went on, then he smiled again, "I didn't know it was a gay bar", his eyes twinkled. "Every eye in the place was on me", his smile, illuminating. I looked into his eyes ... laughing so hard inside ... thinking of his total cluelessness ... he just didn't know how beautiful he was ... he didn't see how stunning his 6'1" frame stood ... his pretty, baby face ... his beautiful muscular taunt frame. "I sat down at the bar. There was this ... well, ... pretty boy .... there", Nik paused, his smile again full, "he was a kid, Marc, a beautiful kid". Nik clearly was infatuated. "I ordered my drink, and I felt him nervously put his leg near mine", Nik went on, "I started talking to him. I dunno, probably for an hour or more ... I couldn't take my eyes off him ... ". I looked into my best friend's eyes, I could see that he was smitten. "Marc", Nik was saying, "all those feelings I had for you ... you", he hesitated, my eyes telling him there was no judgement ... he continued, "they came back ... flooding ... flooding all of my senses ....", he blinked heavily, his firm bicep shifting, as he put his hand to the side of his face. "My cock was so hard .... so, fucking, hard", he said, "my face was flushed as this beautiful kid put his hand on my thigh", Nik said. "I let my leg rest heavily, against his", Nik said, his pupils enlarging, his body sexually charged. "Marc ... I ended up ... in his bed ... his legs around my shoulders ... buried deep inside him ... ", Nik squeezed my hand, " I came in him, Marc, ... no condom ... just his warm wetness tightly around my cock ... him wanting all of me ...". His eyes told me how special this kid was. "Fuck", he paused, " it was the best and most intense feeling I had ever experienced". "Wow", I said, feeling Nik's hand as he reached around, squeezing mine. I gently squeezed his thigh ... he felt so good. "I had such an overwhelming desire for him", Nik went on. "I know", I said, "I know how that feels", looking into his eyes, I could see that he recognized how it felt ... how I felt about his baby. I felt Nik's hand tighten ... he looked vulnerable, open ... "I saw Brandon every chance I had", Nik continued. "We were passionate ... we fucked in every conceivable place ... his body so alive ... so tender ... so completely mine". I nodded, knowing how he felt, realizing that Nik knew he was bi ... that he could love a man just as much as he could love a woman. " ... and mine was for him", Nik added, "I couldn't wait until we were together .... for Brandon to have my body ... my love ... everything". "I know", I heard myself ... I couldn't put into words what I felt for Nikky. I had never felt such feelings; I had suppressed them ... Julia and the twins had been my focus. I knew what Nik had felt ... I knew the turmoil he must have gone through ... alone ... me oblivious. "About three months into it, I knew that I .... loved him", Nik said, " ... then, we got a place ...". "No way", I said, the words just jumping out. "Way!", his smile was so damn bright, " we got an apartment together, near U-dub", he smiled (University of Washington). I smiled, I couldn't help but admire this guy ... he committed ... he protected the one he loved ... provided for him. I realized how angry Nik had been ... at me ... taking Nikky ... keeping it hidden ... the anger that coursed through his blood last night ... the constraint at not ripping down the screen and snatching his baby. The conflict Nik must have at being unfaithful ... spending his free time apart from his family ... with a man ... a man he loved, deeply ... I couldn't imagine what emotions Nik kept ... pent up ... "Wow", I turned moving closer to Nik. "Wow", I heard myself say again. "Yeah, Marc ... wow", Nik smiled. "I came so close ... so close buddy ... to giving everything up ... I loved him so intensely", he said, his smile fading to the beauty of his tranquil face as he thought about this guy. I smiled. "What happened? Why did you leave him?", I asked, feeling his emotion. "I would have lost Julianna .... Lucas .... I couldn't .... I just couldn't do it", he said. He looked into my eyes, I could see him searching me. "You love him", I said. He nodded, tears now appearing, wetting his eyes. "Yes, I do", he said, a tear escaping and tricking down his right cheek. I raised my hand, my thumb brushing it away. My hand lingering on his face, my thumb brushing his lips ... his gorgeous face against my skin. All of my feelings for him returned ... flooding my consciousness with the violence of surging water. "You left him to spare your family?", I said, the realization of what I was saying, hitting me in the belly ... I felt the air escaping from my lungs. "Yes", he simply replied. "Have you talked to him", I said, adding, "I mean, recently?" "Yeah", Nik smiled, "Brandon is married. His husband is successful. He is happy ... really happy". He then smiled wider, "He called me a few months ago. He understands ... and he still loves me". "But", Nik looked deep into me, "I let him slip out of my hands, Marc ... right through my hands". Ours eyes fixed ... looking into each other. The distant, 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' filling my ears. The silence of the room, deafening. 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' "I can't let you do the same", Nik finally whispered, putting his hand on my leg, "even though Lucas is my son ... my baby .... I just can't let that happen". "I have never felt this way", I said, my eye's never losing his. "Nik", I said, my arm reaching over, grasping the meat of his shoulder, "I fell madly in love with Nikky ... I didn't plan it ... I felt dirty at first ... guilty of robbing his innocence ... but .... then ... I fell in love with him". I paused, the silence of the room roared ... 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' ... the sound of the clock ... the light patter of the wind, on the panes of glass, ... 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic'. "I know", Nik finally said, "what I saw between you and Lucas ..... it wasn't sex ....", his hand moved over mine, " .... it was love ... you were making love ... the two of you ...", Nik's voice trailed off. I squeezed his hand. "Buddy, you have no idea how he has changed me", I said, my thoughts racing, all of my feelings for Nikky bubbling up, "I can't put what I feel into words". We sat there .... words, not formed .... alone, in our minds. "If Nikky is anything .... like .... Brandon", Nik's voice weakening, his head swaying slowly. "He consumes my thoughts ... ", I slowly said. "Nikky is so bright, so fucking smart", I said, "he is the one who made me promise that no one would know", I slowly began. I looked at Nik, his features so striking ... his beautiful face softening ... "Nikky is the one who planned out how we would act ... what we would say ... hell", I didn't know how I could go on ... the intimacy of our acts ... I looked into Nik ... finally, I said, "he is the one who told me he wanted me to be the first ...", I paused, "the first one to enter him ... to take him". Nik's hand tensed on mine, then his thumb started to slowly rub my hand. "When?", he paused, "when?". He looked into my eyes. I couldn't hold back. "In January", I quietly said. Nik's eyes probed me, his pupils widened then narrowed ... he realized when ... "Your first night ...", he haltingly continued, "was in January ... he was thirteen". "and six months, six days", my face softening. Nik smiled. I think he saw how Nikky consumed me. "When did you know?", Nik asked, " .... that you loved him?". I looked at Nik, my intense feelings for Nikky bubbling up ... drowning me. "On that night", I said, my face a window of emotion ... , "before Nikky ... ", I looked into Nik, " ... before his mind, as bright and as effervescent as it is, could wrap itself, extricably, around it". 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' 'tic' ....