Date: Sat, 18 Jun 2005 16:16:07 -0700 From: Joseph Farrin Subject: A BOY AT THE WINDOW - PART 2 September was a beautiful month, in every respect; the weather was the best CJ and Kent had experienced since moving to Vermont and the autumn colors of the foliage were spectacular -- all the reds, oranges, yellows. Neither of them had ever experienced anything like it in New York. CJ even found a few moments of distraction in it from his missing Nicholas. He sometimes missed Nicholas so much that he wished he, too, could die if it meant being with Nicholas. God how he loved that kid, even though he was a ghost. One Monday morning, CJ left early for Burlington to attend an estate sale that included antique furniture; he purchased 10 or 12 large items and made arrangements with the auction house to have what he'd purchased shipped to Carlton. On returning, he didn't go back to the store but went directly home. On arrival, he used the back door to the garage to enter the house through the patio door. He happened to glance downhill, toward the college campus, and saw a boy coming out of the tool shed at the rear corner of the property. For a second he thought it was Nicholas and damn near passed out -- in shock and in fright. Maybe he was going crazy, just like Senator Allison. At the same time, he knew Nicholas wouldn't do this to him! The kid waved to him and that only made matters worse. He took his cell phone out of his pocket, in case he needed to call 911, and sat down on a patio chair. The kid was now about 50 feet from the patio and hollers "Are you CJ?" The closer he got the more the kid looked like Nicholas, skinny with long, blond hair and blue eyes. However this boy's eyes were deep set, under eyebrows that were dark brown rather than blonde. And, again like Nicholas, he was almost dangerously cute -- attractive to any man who liked boys. CJ confronted him. "Who are you? You're trespassing, you know." "I'm sorry I've been waiting for you. I'm looking for work. I'm from Chelsea, 30 miles east of here and hitch-hiked to Carlton to bum a ride south on the freeway, stopped at a café, got to talking to a guy and he said maybe you could use me." "Who was this guy?" "I don't remember his name but he said he worked for the contractor that remolded your house." "And why did he say I might employ you?" "He said you fixed up your house but your property was a mess. That's why I went to the tool shed. Man, you have a woodchopper for making wood chips, a mower, a chain saw and they all need fixing which I know how to do. The fruit trees haven't been picked." "Frozen food companies will send crews in to pick them next time they produce and pay you money." "Charity organizations will pick them and you can get an income tax credit." "Then, do you know you've got about 10 cords of wood from what needs trimmed from the shade trees. That's damn near a winter's supply!" CJ knew a cord was a measurement of firewood but not the exact quantity. He'd never been in the tool shed because of the triple murder there, so he had to assume the previous owner had left the tools. But he was skeptical of the boy. "You know my name, what's yours?" "I'm Nicholas." "And you're a fucking phony. Go away! Get the hell away from me before I dial 911." "Honestly, my name's Nicholas James. I'm sorry, man, I really am. I don't know why I upset you, but I'm sorry anyway." CJ started to get out of his chair but couldn't make it. Instead he put his elbows on his knees, buried his face in his hands and cried like a baby. Nicholas was now as frightened as CJ had been when he saw Nicholas coming out of the shed. He didn't really know how to handle the situation, but felt he should try to comfort CJ, so he knelt before him, wrapped him in his arms, put his head against CJ's chest and said: "I can't tell you how sorry I am CJ. I'll leave now, or you can call the police and I'll wait for them. I didn't intend to hurt you." "No, stay. I mean just stay, I'm not going to call 911. Just hug me!" CJ took his hands away from his eyes and wrapped them around Nicholas' head as Nicholas continued to hug him. Neither of them spoke. Only birds, seeking a place to roost for the night, broke the silence until they heard someone shout: "What the fuck is this all about?" It was Kent. He scared both of them but CJ more so than Nicholas. He also scattered the birds. CJ had always sensed that Kent was a little jealous of the relationship between him and Nicholas but felt it had healed after Nicholas had died, for the second time, so to speak. He imagined that Kent now assumed that he and Nicholas were in a compromising position. Both CJ and the new boy rose and stood as Kent said to Nicholas, "What's your name?" "Nicholas, sir." "And you're a fucking liar." "That's what CJ said, but I think he said fraud, not liar." "I hope you have logical explanation of why you were kneeling between CJ's legs and you arm's wrapped around him." CJ interrupted and said, "Sit down Kent and I'll explain. Nicholas you go into the kitchen, there are trays behind that 4-inch wide, lower cabinet door by the fridge, get one and bring out a bottle of Chivas Regal Scotch and a bottle of Club Soda, 3 glasses and a tray of ice cubes. Please." To Kent, CJ said, "Please! Calm down, the boy's honest" and continued to tell Kent everything that had occurred." Kent did calm down a fraction by the time Nicholas returned. CJ poured all three of them a stiff drink, thinking Nicholas probably needed one more than anyone. Kent began an inquisition. "What does your dad do in Chelsea?" "He owns a small, automobile repair shop, specializing in foreign cars, sir." "Why did you leave home, are you in trouble." "I'm not in trouble, sir. My mom is crippled and confined to a wheelchair; I graduated from high school in June and stayed with my folks during the summer and did odd jobs to help them out; then my dad told me he thought it best if I left and found work elsewhere." "Will you please stop calling me sir? You're making me feel like an old man." "Yes sir. I mean Kent. Can I call you Kent?" "Kent will do fine." "Why did your dad think it best you left?" "I wasn't in trouble but my dad knew I was hanging out with a boy that's gay and in a small town he didn't think it wise for me to stay until the rumors started to fly? "Are you gay?" "I don't know for sure, but I think I am. I like what boys do together." "How old are you?" "Seventeen." CJ said, "Let's go in and I'll fix a light supper." Kent and Nicholas followed him in and they continued talking while sitting and watching CJ fixed ham and eggs and toast with butter and blackberry jam, plus coffee. Kent was not ready to relent. "You said you were 17, when were you born?" "In 1987." Kent didn't catch on but CJ immediately recognized that to be the same year as Nicholas had been born, and he too would now be 17 if he had not been murdered. The most amazing coincidence to CJ, though, was when Nicholas began, nervously and subconsciously, rolling a pencil back and forth across the table as he conversed with Kent, just as Nicholas had done on the day he visited the store, as a signal to let CJ know he was there. After eating they went back to the patio. It was still nice outside. Nicholas asked if he could sleep in the garage for the night until they decided what they wanted to do about hiring him. By now Kent had softened his attitude somewhat and said, "With 3 bedrooms upstairs there is no need for you to sleep in the garage. It gets cold at night." On retiring, CJ took him to Nicholas's old haunt, the northwest bedroom. In bed, CJ and Kent talked, argued and Kent complained. "Shit, you sure seem to be a magnet for boys." "Honestly, I don't try to. It just seems to be one of those things." "Correction. It's just two of those things. And this Nicholas is one too many." "He knows it's confusing and told me we could call him Nick" "And what's that going to solve." "The name confusion." "Big deal. Do you really think he's OK." "Sure, he's clean, polite, wants to work, seems to have a lot of skills and the yard is in worse shape than the house was. You have to admit that. If you're still skeptical, call telephone information and ask if there are any James listed for Chelsea." "I don't have to admit anything and I don't see paying someone for 40 hours work a week for yard work even if money is not an issue. But, I'll give in to you, as usual, if he'll work part time in the yard and part time at the store, varying his schedule to meet demands." They hugged, kissed and went to sleep, neither being in the mood for sex. The digital clock on CJ's nightstand read 3:05 AM when he saw a light go on in the hall then heard the toilet flush and, a few seconds later, a knock on the door. "Who is it?" "Nick. Can I come in?" "Sure. Are you OK?" Is my room where Nicholas hung out?" "Yes, it is. Why?" "Well the wind has become very strong and it's scary." "It is strong, I got up fifteen minutes` ago and closed our window. And when it comes out of the northwest that room really gets it.' By now Kent was awake and listening." "It's frightening, too. It's like it's talking to me. I know that sounds like a crock of shit but it really does." Kent asked, "What does it say?" "I don't know for sure but it sounds like it's saying something -- the same thing over and over again. It's something I never noticed about a wind before. As I said, it's frightening." CJ tried to assure him it was OK but Kent interrupted and told him, "Nick, turn out the hall and bathroom lights and get in with us. It's a king size bed." Nick crawled into bed from the foot, Kent lifted up the covers so he could slip in into the middle between them. He turned and spooned up to CJ's back. Kent, not to be left out, turned and spooned up to Nick's back. It took awhile for them to drop off asleep. All of them had erections. CHAPTER 2 Nick proved his worth at both yard work and in the store. By the end of November, he'd trimmed trees, raked, mowed, stacked cords of wood behind the garage and spread wood chips over the orchard area as far as they went. Before spreading them he had piled them in view of the college campus and the maintenance department desperately wanted to buy them. In short, he'd done everything possible to do in the yard for the time of year it was. At the store, he was a real blessing when it came to lifting, unpacking and hauling crating materials to the dump. The boy was so overeager that Kent purchased a support belt for him to wear around his waist. When he resisted, Kent insisted, telling him he didn't want him to injure his back because it was something that could bother him on and off all of his life. In addition to his work ethic, he was a delight to live and work with. He smiled constantly and was eye catching in his animations when he talked. It made a person smile just to watch him, especially when engaged in a spirited but friendly argument, which, aided by his gestures, he usually won. Like so many high school aged boys, he was hooked on beer. Since he was a newcomer, he had no high school buddies to hang out or carouse with. Consequently he spent evenings at home. Kent and CJ loved his company but watched themselves, as they did not want to get back into the bad habits of their New York days. Like all teenage boys, he also had very active hormones. It no longer took a windy night for the three of them to get into the king sized bed and do the things that Nicholas had hinted at when he told Kent he didn't know if he was gay but he knew he liked the things boys did together. In fact, he no longer dodged the issue of being gay. Also, during November CJ and Nick drove to Chelsea and Nick's dad did a complete checkup on CJ's BMW. Also, the three of them spent Thanksgiving with Nick's parents. December began with Kent announcing that he wanted to have a Christmas open house party for some of the store's long time, inherited customers plus the Howards and the Longs -- the other two families that lived on Hill Cut Road, who they, by now, had met. Having the initial idea was the extent of Kent' participation for getting things ready CJ decided to have a bar set up in the front hall between the staircase and the living room wall because it could be accessed from the kitchen to keep it stocked. He hired a catering firm to prepare and serve the hors d'oeuvres; a bartender was contracted for, as was a young lady to take coats and hats upstairs. All and all, 30 persons were invited. The date was set for Saturday evening, December 17th. The first week in December, CJ woke drowsy one morning, was rooting around in his bureau drawers looking for socks and underwear when he noticed a note where Nicholas had read the first one CJ had left there and not laid it down in the exact same place. Nichols picked it up and rushed to the master bathroom and locked the door so he could read it in private. The instant he'd seen it he knew it was from Nicholas. The note read: "Hi CJ. See you at the party. Not to worry -- no tricks. Tell Kent and Nick so I wont' shock them. Love ya. Nicholas." CJ was elated by the thought of seeing Nicholas again but he was also shocked and filled with disbelief along with a myriad of other emotions. Kent was already up and already downstairs in his bathrobe making coffee. When CJ handed him the note he said, "Tell me, how many fucking times can a person die and how many fucking times can a ghost come back?" CJ just raised the palms of his hands up in that age-old gesture that, when accompanied by raised eyebrows, said, "I have no idea." Kent was not the domestic type and considered putting up a Christmas tree a domestic task. It required CJ and Nick one entire weekend to find a suitable tree, buy lights and ornaments and decorate the tree. Sunday evening, with the tree lights glowing and a fire in the fireplace, all three of them lounged on the floor in front of the fireplace, had a highball and looked at the tree. CJ and Kent both felt a little emotional and admitted it was the most home like room they'd ever lived in and Nick said he wanted them to know that he was really thankful that they'd not only given him a job but shared their home and their lives with him. On the evening of the party, Kent and CJ stood in the hall, welcoming their guests, wishing them a Merry Christmas and chatting while they took off their coats and the girl they hired gave them a claim number before taking them upstairs. The Longs had brought their daughter, Laura, along, a freshman at Carlton College and she immediately latched onto Nick. It wasn't too hard to tell that he was a little awkward in the situation. Maybe he was just shy. Of course, not everyone arrived at the same time and an hour had passed when the bartended asked Kent if he could bring in another bag of ice from the freezer in the garage and one of the caterer's people wanted to see CJ in the kitchen for a few minutes. Kent came back with the ice, entering through the patio door and handed it to the bartender and then backtracked through the kitchen. CJ was finished so they walked together back to the living room. There, cross legged, on the floor, looking at the fire, was Nicholas, dressed in black pants, black, dress shoes, a white shirt without tie and a Christmas red, wool sweater -- the shirt collar out over the neck of the sweater. He must have sensed their entering the room, as he turned his head, got up, walked across the room and said, "Merry Christmas Uncle CJ and Uncle Kent." Kent reached down and hoisted him up as he threw his arms around their both their necks at the same time and they all kissed. No way was it embarrassing, as his calling them both Uncle made the hugging and kissing very natural to anyone who saw them. It also gave Nick the opportunity to excuse himself from Laura Long and come over to meet Nicholas. It was astounding when the two of them stood side by side, Nick with his hand on Nicholas' shoulder, just how much they looked alike. They could easily have been brothers; right down to the way they phrased things and smiled. Too, by coincidence or otherwise, the only difference in their dress was Nick was wearing a Christmas red, wool jacket instead of a sweater. Five minutes later, Nichols took Nick's hand, led him to the bar and they each ordered two cokes. They then went to the butler's pantry and after sipping some coke out of the glasses, Nicholas added in some rum. By 11 o'clock, the last guest had left. The clean up took less time than CJ had expected. The bartender put all of the liquor back in the butlers pantry and the food caterers made the rounds collecting all the glasses, plates and silverware in trays and carting them out to their truck. CJ had paid them in advanced but gave them all generous tips and thanked them for all they'd done. Everyone undressed down to their shirtsleeves. They all fixed another round of highballs and sat in a semi-circle in front of the fire. It sounded odd until you thought of it and decided it was a logical question for a 17-year-old boy when Nick asked Nicholas, "Have you seen God yet?" "No, and I probably never will. Have you ever seen the President? "No, and I probably never will." "You have a better chance than I do. The President rules over one country; God rules over everybody that's ever died from all the countries in the world. CJ, knowing Kent was a Republican couldn't help but put in a dig. "Yea, but by the same token, he's probably a lot wiser." Everyone laughed except Kent. He smiled at CJ and gave him the finger. CJ and Kent both had questions, but Nick was eager and always got his in first after Nicholas answered the previous one. "Just tell us what's it's like and what's happened to you." "To start in the beginning, my dad met me the instant I arrived, and I was soon after joined by 15 men, some as old as 40 and some my age and all gay. My dad stayed a while, said I'd be happier with the men, told me he'd see me often and told one of the older guys how to find him. I moved in with the men; camped with them probably is more descriptive as there are no buildings. We pray together every evening. There are no churches but there are people of all faiths. As it turned out there is only one God and all the different religions worship him instead of fighting between themselves over who's right and stirring up hatred over people because of skin color." "Where is this camp?" "In a very beautiful, wooded park, the weather is always perfect. Everything grows without rain." CJ interrupted and asked how and why he came back. "Well, some people come back permanently in a new life as another person. Don't ask me why. I think it's because that's what they want to do. Some others can occasionally go back and forth. I don't know about all of them, but I do know I've always had special, sometimes scary, abilities. I knew before Kent and CJ left New York that someone was coming to live in this house that loved me and they held the key to ending my career as a ghost. The afternoon they bought the house and left again I was so disappointed that I kept looking out the window and saw CJ in the back seat and again that night when he stood with his flashlight out in the middle of the road (Kent looked at CJ -- it was the first time he'd heard that). Too, they were the only people I trusted enough to make my self visible to and CJ was the only person I'd ever met, other than my mom and dad, that I loved and I knew it was a different, special kind of love." Luckily, Kent understood, reached over and put his hand on top of CJ's. "You can also blame me for sending Nick to you. I sensed CJ needed someone to help him forget me. I knew Nicholas was at a turning point in his life and I was so happy when you accepted each other. And Nick, that first night when the wind scared you, I was trying to tell you to love them." Nick asked, "Why me?" "Much the same as when I knew Kent and CJ were coming before they left New York. I knew your dad wanted you to leave Chelsea and I kind of took over and led you to this house." "Jeez, Nicholas, I believe you but I wish there was some way you could prove at least a part of this power you have. Can you?" "Maybe. Give me time to think about it." Kent remarked it was getting late. Nick responded to his remark by saying, "Let's you and I stake out the master bedroom and CJ and Nicholas can camp in my room." Nicholas then asked CJ for a note pad and a pen. He wrote something on it and the four of them all signed their names on the envelope, being sure that their signatures crossed the sealed strip to prevent someone from opening it and then said, "Leave this here until sometime tomorrow. It's the answer to Nick's question on proof of my insights." Nick placed it on the fireplace mantel. CHAPTER 3 It wasn't until a month had passed and Kent and CJ compared notes on that first night of Nicholas' return when they realized that the two boys had made similar requests one they were in bed. Nick asked Kent if they could do something different than they'd been doing and Kent told him to name it -- anything that would make him happy. "The first thing I ever did with another boy was jack off together." "Any special way?" "Not the way the guy I'm telling you about did but, yea, I've been thinking about how I want you to do it. Go to the bathroom, get a towel and spread it out on the bed. Get some hand lotion, too. I want to lay down with you behind me and your big hard cock pushed as far as it will go between my legs. Then get my cock and your hand all slippery, reach around and jack me really slow, then faster and harder. Keep it slick with the hand lotion and jack me just like your jacking your self, because that's what I'm going to fantasize -- I'm in bed with you and you're masturbating. I hope using lotion will make some sex noises. I want to hear what it sounds like while you're flogging my meat." As Kent well knew, Nick was a teenage boy with the cock of a fully-grown, fully developed man -- a beautiful, cut, 7-inch piece of hard cock flesh for giving sexual pleasure. For both of them it was an intimate activity that they would have prolonged forever but lasted only briefly. When Nick exploded, Kent tried to contain it in his hand, as well as some of his own for that matter, as his own big cock had poked clear through Nick's legs and climaxed all over Nick's testicles simultaneously with Nick's cum. Immediately, Nick turned over to face Kent and while they were locked together in an open mouth kiss, they reached down and masturbated each other to a second moment of sexual ecstasy even more intense than the first. They didn't move until their bodies ceased their spasms and their breathing returned to somewhat normal. Across the hall, in the other bedroom, Nicholas had a similar request of CJ, remembering he and CJ had done it to him before and it was something that he had always remembered. So, with the bedside lamp on so they could see, they stood naked, with CJ's left arm draped around Nicholas's shoulder and his huge erection pressed against Nicholas' side, he reached down, fondled Nicholas hairless testicles, then with the thumb and forefinger of his right hand, slipped back the foreskin of his tiny, 4-inch boy, penis and slowly played with it until he knew he was experiencing the thrill of his false, prepubescent climax. All the while, Nicholas had his small hand wrapped around the shaft of CJ's. He didn't jerk it, he didn't need to. CJ ejaculated just watching Nicholas as he climaxed. Never during their playing with the other did their eyes move from the other's genitals. CJ thought the boy was about to feint, so he grabbed him, wrapped his arms around him and when they were both in bed they were face to face and Nicholas was atop CJ. CJ was afraid they'd fall asleep that way so he turned off the light and managed to pull the covers over them until they both did just what CJ had feared. The first light of Sunday morning crept into the room before CJ woke and listened for a while to Nicolas' deep breathing before gently lifting him off to his side and wrapping him in his arms. What could have been nicer, what could have been more exciting, what could have been more natural for these two men and two boys? The male genitals, being external, subject to visible enlarging when aroused are electrifying to those boys that lack an attraction to girls. For youth the attraction of a grown man is beyond description -- his testicles are larger, his penis is larger, he has developed pubic hairs and every boy has heard that a man's penis jerks around and squirts juice out of it's piss slit when sexually aroused. Likewise, some men do not draw a line against having sexual relations with boys. For them it is a fantasy. They remember how attracted, as boys, they were to men and now, doing it with a boy, were, in a way, reliving their boy hood. Then, too, nothing could compare with the small mouth of a boy wrapped round a big, hard male cock. For boys like Nick, who now had their own big sex organ, they still liked sex with an older man. They had formed childhood habits, strong habits that could not be broken even if they wanted to. Everyone was seated at the table in the kitchen Sunday Morning, except Nicholas. When he finally arrived, wearing one of CJ's bathrobes, the bottom of which almost touched the floor, he saw Kent was reading advertisements in the "Burlington Free Press" just as he had entered his mind and suggested he do. "I'll be damned, here's an advertisement by a new firm, State Wide Driving School. I can take their course at the college any Tuesday evening and when I'm finished I can receive actual driving experience on Saturdays. I'm going to call them Monday." Nicholas asked Nick if he would go get the envelope off the fireplace mantel. When he returned to the kitchen and sat down, Nicholas said, "Nick you asked the question, why don't you open the envelope and read the answer." Nick read aloud, "Tomorrow Kent will decide to take driving lessons and two months from now he will buy a new Volvo." Needless to say everyone was stunned." Kent asked him how he knew. He said he didn't know how he knew, he just knew. "Well what if I don't take the lessons?" "Then you won't get your new Volvo, which I know you've always wanted." "That's a point. If you ever discover how you know, please tell me the secret." "I think you might have to become a ghost first." (Monday Kent did call and arranged for his first class the next evening. He could walk over to the campus. He wouldn't even need to ask CJ for a ride, as he usually did.) Sunday was a lazy day. CJ and Nick had worked hard all day Saturday getting things ready for the party and it had lasted quite late. No body objected going to bed early. Again Nicholas and CJ slept together. Kent and Nick recognized that their need to be together. There was no sex, but a lot of kissing, hugging and talking, quietly in almost whisper tones. Nicholas told CJ he wanted him to stop thinking about dying so he could see him again. "Live CJ, enjoying what you have and you have a lot, don't live it wishing for what you don't have. "I know Nicholas, it just that sometime I wish so hard that we'd met years before we did. Like maybe I could have been an older brother or even your Father." "That would have been nice, but I don't think we could have loved each other more than we do right now. And, CJ, after you live out your life with Kent, we will have our own to life." "You mean here or in Heaven?" "I don't know. I just know it will happen. God had already put us together. Oh, and I forgot to tell Nick something when he was asking all his questions. He didn't ask but I was going to tell him anyway." "What was it Nicholas?" "Next time I come back I'm going to be 17 years old." "You mean you won't be back for 10 years?" "No I mean I like Nick. I'm just going to change into being the same age. In our next life together, say you die 40 years from now; you can be the same age as you are now, and I could change back to being 10 years old. Or we could try out different ages and settle on both being the same age. I'll do whatever would make you the happiest." "Will you find me like your dad found you?" "I'll do better than that. I'll be with you the instant you die." Finally they kissed and CJ went to sleep with his arms around Nicholas. At 6:30 CJ got up with his arms still around Nicholas, got quietly out of bed, went to the bathroom and didn't flush the toilet, as he didn't want to wake Nicholas. Back in bed he again wrapped his arms around Nicholas and kissed the back of his neck. At 7AM the alarm sounded, he was still in the same position but Nicholas was no longer in his arms. He whipped around, scanned the room. He noticed a note on the nightstand. "Thanks CJ. Don't worry. I'll be back anytime you need me, and I'll know when those times are. Too, Kent will pass his driver's exam. Tell him and Nick goodbye. Love ya, Nicholas."