Date: Sun, 4 Oct 2020 07:13:40 -0500 From: Keith Yates Subject: Devyn's Struggle V2-31 This is a fictional story involving sexual acts between two or more men. If this offends you, why are you here? If you are under the legal age to read sexually explicit material then do not read any further. This story in no way represents any person living or dead. Any resemblance to any real person is purely coincidental. This story is the property of the author and no copying or posting to any other website is permitted without the author's written consent. Please help keep Nifty going by donating to this awesome service. http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html Devyn's Struggle V2 Chapter 31 "You shouldn't be here," Brent said. "Why did you come back?" "I, um, I wanted to see you," Devyn stammered. "I told you that we can't see each other anymore," Brent said. "I told you, I'm not like you. You need help. You are sick. I can't be like you." "Brent," Devyn began, but the blonde did not let him speak. "I'm not a faggot like you," Brent said. "I can't believe you tricked me like you did." "I didn't," Devyn said. Brent turned away, "just go away Devyn," he said. He started to walk away from Devyn. Reaching out, Devyn grabbed Brent and pulled him back, but when Brent turned around, it was not Brent looking at Devyn. "Tom!" Devyn cried, releasing the man. "You are worthless," Tom said. "You are a fucking faggot. You are good for one thing and one thing only. You are a fuck toy. You are a fucking slut. You are a whore." Devyn was confused. Brent had disappeared and now Tom was there. "No," Devyn said. "No, you are in jail." "No one could love you now," Tom said. "Not after the way you were giving yourself to man after man. You are a common whore. You are a no-good slut." Suddenly, Brent was there, standing next to Tom. "He's right," Brent said. "You're a faggot slut. You tried to force me to be like you." "No," Devyn said. "I didn't. You wanted to be with me. I love you." "I am not like you," Brent said again and again. Then Tom was there, grabbing Devyn and shaking him. "Go away," Devyn muttered. "You are in jail. You aren't here." "No, I am right here," Tom said. "I am here, and you are going to be mine again. You are going to be my little two-bit whore. You are going to be my fuck toy and the fuck toy for anyone who pays me to fuck that faggot ass." "No," Devyn said. Tom was shaking him harder than before. "No." # # # "Devyn wake up," Joe said again. He gripped the teenager's bare shoulder and shook the teen again. "I, I," Devyn said, his eyes flying open. He looked up at Joe. "You were dreaming," Joe said. "I could hear you muttering. You sounded upset. It sounded like a nightmare." "Shit," Devyn said. "Shit." "I did not think you were still having those nightmares," Joe said tenderly, brushing Devyn's hair back from the boy's face. Sitting down on the bed next to Devyn he asked, "Do you want to talk about it?" "It was just a dream," Devyn said. He tried to clear his head. He tried to push the nightmare from his mind. "I don't know why I was thinking about all of that. It was...," Devyn's voice got softer. He should be past all of this. He should be over all of this. "It was just a stupid nightmare." Joe's thumb rubbed across Devyn's cheek. He felt the wetness. He could see the redness in the eyes. "If it bothered you this much, it is more than a nightmare. Does it have something to do with this?" Leaning forward Joe reached down and picked up the picture that had fallen to the floor. He looked at the two teens in the picture. Devyn had been one damn cute kid. He looked incredibly happy in the picture. Joe looked back at Devyn. Yes, the teenager had been cute, but now the kid was handsome. Devyn had regained some of that boyishness, but added maturity to the cute face. Devyn had always been attractive, but now the teen was really going to be a heartthrob. "I don't think I have ever seen this before." The blonde boy in the photo looked just as happy. He was also quite attractive, but to Joe, Devyn was better looking. "It is me and Brent," Devyn said. He then looked up and met Joe's eyes. He saw the caring reflected there. He also saw the sympathy. Devyn glanced down, away from Joe's eyes. He glanced at Joe's bare chest. He glanced at the shorts the man was wearing. Devyn then looked back up and noticed Joe's hair was still wet. He must have just gotten out of the shower. He must have come up to tell Devyn it was his turn in the shower. "You two make a very attractive pair," Joe said. "You two look so happy." Joe could definitely see why Devyn was attracted to Brent. The blond hair, with those curls, the blue eyes and flawless skin made the boy a definite hot looking kid. It was no wonder the two had been drawn together. They would have made one heck of an attractive couple. "We were," Devyn said. "We were until I messed it up." "You haven't talked about him for a while," Joe said. "Just how did you mess things up with him?" "Wanting to have sex," Devyn said. "Maybe I am just a slut like Tom always said. Just another faggot." "Now you listen to me," Joe said. His voice was firm but still filled with caring. "We do not use that word in this house. And you are no slut. Where did that come from?" "Slut, whore, whatever I am," Devyn said. "It is all the same." "Devyn!" Joe said. "You are so much more than you think. You are none of that. You may have made mistakes, but who hasn't." "You," Devyn said. "Bullshit!" Joe said. "I have made plenty of mistakes. I have screwed up more than you know. You messed up. You made a bad decision, but they were not solely yours. You were pushed into them by others like your parents. Plus, Tom is quite the manipulator. He is a piece of scum. He is worse than filth." "But I," Devyn began. "I pushed Brent into it." "Having sex?" Joe asked, to make sure he was understanding Devyn. "Yes," Devyn said. "He said I pushed him into it." "I do not believe that," Joe said, with confidence. "Is that what he told you or did Tom put that idea into your head?" "Brent kind of said that," Devyn said. "Was this after your folks found you and Brent together?" Joe asked. "Yes," Devyn said. "It was so crazy. I think I was in a sort of shock at first. I sat there on my bed after my parents walked out of the room. Dad had told me to basically get out and not come back. I still could not really believe it. It had been my worst fear." # # # Devyn could remember it all too clearly. He sat there on his bed trying to hold back the tears, but could not. They came, despite his efforts. He did not know how long he sat there and cried. He wiped at his eyes with his fingers and sniffled. He looked at the door, hoping his Dad would come back and tell him he could stay. Devyn wanted him to come back and tell the teenager that he loved him. Devyn just wanted to hear those words from his parents. He took a shaky deep breath. He slowly was beginning to realize that it was not going to happen. His Dad was not going to come back. Devyn was not going to hear his parents tell him they still loved him. Devyn took another shaky deep breath. He slowly let it out. He wiped his eyes again. He knew he had to grow up. He had to stop being a baby. He grabbed some tissues and blew his nose. He had to pull himself together. He had to be a man. He started moving around the room getting dressed. He knew he had to think things through. He had to take the essentials with him. He was sure his folks would not be letting him come back to get stuff after he left. After stuffing as many winter clothes into his backpack that would fit, he went to the bible his grandmother had given him several years ago. He opened it and read her inscription. To him her handwriting always looked elegant. He considered calling her, but she was still in Europe. Plus, he was not sure he was strong enough to have her hate him as well. If he never talked to her, then he would not know how she despised him. He could pretend she loved him still. He took the money out that she had given him for Christmas. He added it to his wallet. It was not much but he hoped he could stretch it. He then stuffed the bible into the backpack. He did not really have room for anything else. Slowly he moved to the door. He looked around the room. He could not believe this was happening. He looked at the posters on the walls. He knew that he might never see them again. He looked out the window that looked over at Brent's house. He knew this was all happening because they had fallen in love with each other. "It just can't be wrong," Devyn thought. "Our love shouldn't be wrong." Devyn took another look around the room. He glanced at the trophy from Little League. He looked at the unmade bed. The sheets and covers still pushed into a pile where he and Brent had pushed them when they had started their most intimate act. Devyn pushed back the tears, then turned to the door. He stepped through it and into the hall. He wanted this nightmare to end. He wanted to wake up and to be lying next to Brent. He wanted his friend's warm skin pressed against him. As he walked down the stairs, Devyn hoped his father would relent and let him stay. He prayed that he would forgive him. He wanted that more than anything he had wanted before. Devyn found his mother and father sitting in the kitchen. They were quiet as he walked into the room. The silence stretched out as he waited for them to tell him they loved him and they wanted him to stay. Devyn could not stand the silence any longer. He looked from his mom to his dad. Neither of them would meet his eyes. "Dad, please don't..." Devyn's voice cracked and his eyes were brimming with unshed tears. "Don't what?" Frank said. "Don't throw a faggot out of my house. I should have known the first time I saw you with that old queer at the construction site. I should have known then." "Dad, I..." Devyn said. Frank went on as if Devyn had not said a single word. "I should have known he was corrupting you. I should have known as much time as you spent with that boy Brent that it was wrong. I should have put a stop to it before I...before that happened." "Dad," Devyn said. "I am the same as I have always been. Nothing is..." "You are abnormal," Frank said, cutting off Devyn's words. "You are a sick person Devyn. Maybe someday you can change and come back to us as a normal person. Maybe you will realize how wrong this is." Devyn wanted to say he would change. He wanted to tell his Dad that he would not have those feelings for other boys anymore, but he knew in his gut that it would be a lie. He had already tried to fight it once and lost. He had tried dating, he had tried kissing, he had gone all the way with Sue and it had not helped him. "Until that time," Frank said, "I want you out of here. I want you out of my sight so I can try and forget what I... what I walked in on." "I'm, I'm sorry," Devyn said and turned and left the room. He went through the front door into the warm sunny afternoon. The air was still cold but the sun was warm. He zipped his coat up and tossed the backpack over his shoulder. He walked down the sidewalk and looked over at Brent's house. He wondered if Brent had gotten into trouble when he got home. He wondered if maybe he could stay there. Maybe Brent's parents would be more understanding. Devyn walked across the street and up to Brent's door. He had just about had his finger on the doorbell when the door was opened. "Hey," Devyn said looking into Brent's blue eyes. "Why are you here?" Brent asked. "I, um, my parents...they threw me out," Devyn said. "Well, you can't stay here," Brent said. Devyn was surprised by how cool Brent's voice was and how his eyes would not meet Devyn's. "Do, do your parents know?" Devyn asked. "Yeah, your Dad called them," Brent said. "I can't see you anymore. We can't be friends. My Dad is talking about sending me to military school. He thinks they will make a man out of me." "Brent, who are you talking too," Richard said, moving up to the door behind his son. "No one, no one." Brent said closing the door on Devyn. Devyn turned his heart sinking in his chest. He had taken only a step before the door was jerked open. "You are not welcome here Devyn," Richard said. "You are not to step foot here again, is that understood?" "Sir, I um..." Devyn began. "Brent has told us what happened," Richard said, as if Devyn had not spoken. "He told us what you tried to force him to do. I won't have you doing that with my son again. You are to stay away from him." "Force him?" Devyn said, surprised. "I didn't force him to do anything." "Don't stand there and lie to my face," Richard said. "Brent told us the whole disgusting thing. I thought you were a good kid. I am incredibly sad to find out just what kind of sick pervert lives next to us. I can't believe you would force yourself on Brent like that." "I, I...," Devyn stammered in shock. "Now get out of here and don't come back," Richard said. "Brent doesn't want to see you and neither do I." The door was closed in Devyn's face. He could only imagine what Brent had told his folks to make them believe Devyn had forced Brent. # # # "I lost my parents," Devyn said, "I lost my home and I lost my best friend. I really had no idea where I was going to go or what I was going to do." "It sounds bad," Joe said squeezing Devyn's leg. "I'm sorry you had to go through that." "It was hard," Devyn said. "It was so hard." That wasn't the last time you saw Brent though?" Joe asked. "No," Devyn said. "I would see him in school." "So where did you go after that?" Joe asked. "I just started walking," Devyn said. He could still feel the fear and loss that he had felt that day. # # # Devyn walked for hours. He did not know where he could go or what he should do. He was lost in his thoughts. He did not pay attention to where he was walking. His stomach was tied up in knots. His eyes burned at the tears that kept threatening to spill. He had been so caught up in his despair, that he had not noticed that it had gotten dark. "What the hell am I going to do?" he asked himself. As the sun sank, the wind started picking up. Devyn could feel the air growing colder. All he needed was for it to snow. He had of course read and seen movies about homeless people. He had just never thought that he would be one of them. He never thought he would be kicked out of his home. "Why did you make me a fucking faggot?" Devyn asked looking up at the first stars of the night. Devyn made his way through the town to the theater. He figured he could sit in there and watch a movie and get warmed up. Maybe he would figure out what he needed to do and where he could go. "What would you like to see?" the ticket agent asked. "Um," Devyn said, not sure. "Um, what is the longest movie?" "Just trying to avoid going back home?" the agent asked. "Um, something like that," Devyn said, looking into the guys warm brown eyes. Devyn guessed the guy to be a couple years older than he was. He thought he might even be a senior. The guy's brown hair was almost the same color as Devyn's but it was cut shorter. The guy took in Devyn's red and puffy eyes. Then he saw the backpack on Devyn's right shoulder. "Are you alright?" he asked, his voice warm and genuinely concerned. "Yeah," Devyn lied. "This one's almost three hours," the ticket agent said, handing Devyn the ticket. "Thanks," Devyn said, pulling his wallet from his pocket. "It's on me," the agent said. "What?" Devyn said. "I got it for you," he said. "Just enjoy the movie." "Um, thanks," Devyn said. "I, um, appreciate it." "When you have a chance," the agent said, "just pay it forward." "I will," Devyn promised. "Um, thanks, Alex," Devyn said, reading the name from the badge the guy was wearing. Devyn headed to the theater but stopped at the smell of the popcorn. He had not had anything to eat since he and Brent ate the pizza last night. He had not realized how hungry he was until he smelled the popcorn. He broke down and bought the largest popcorn. He found a secluded spot in the back of the theater and sat watching and munching his popcorn. He wished he could have bought a soda to wash down the popcorn, but he had not wanted to waste the money on the overpriced soft drink. He knew he had limited cash, so he had to stretch it as far as he could. He watched the movie but could not really focus on the plot. His mind kept coming back to his situation. He wondered if maybe he gave his parents time to adjust to the situation that they might let him come back home. He hoped that they could forgive him for something that was beyond his control. After finishing off the popcorn, he made his way to the men's room and drank down handfuls of water from the sink faucet. Then he relieved his bladder and made his way back to the theater. A second movie had started and he resumed his place. He was just lucky that he had missed the ticket attendant's attention. He would be able to spend another two hours or so in the warm theater. # # # Devyn felt himself shaking. He opened his eyes to a bright light. "Kid get your ass up," came a deep male voice from behind the light. Devyn was confused. He did not know where he was or who was talking to him. "I um, I," Devyn said trying to make his foggy mind work. "This isn't some sort of flop house," the man said. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep," Devyn said. Devyn pulled himself out of the seat. His whole body felt stiff. He had a kink in every muscle from the awkward position he had slept in the chair. "Just get your shit and get out of here," the man said. "Yes, yes sir. I am sorry," Devyn apologized. Devyn grabbed his backpack and made his way out onto the dark street. Damn if the guy had just left him alone, he might have been able to spend the night hidden back in his corner of the theater. Devyn looked at the clock outside the bank and saw it was after one in the morning. Then he saw the cold 25-degree temperature. He knew it was going to be far too cold for him to just sleep on the street. He made his way through the deserted streets. He hoped he would find somewhere to rest. He could maybe go home. Perhaps his parents would let him back home. They had surely calmed down. Devyn started walking for[1] home. He was sure his parents would not shut the door in his face. He moved quietly up the sidewalk to his door. The house was dark. His folks were probably asleep. He could just use his key and go inside. Maybe they would not even have to know he was there until he came downstairs in the morning. He wondered if he could just pretend as though yesterday had not happened. He wondered if his parents could play along and pretend they had not found him and Brent together. Devyn inserted his key into the deadbolt and turned. He heard the lock click and he turned the knob and pushed the door open. Silently he moved through the house. The silence seemed loud in his ears as he made his way to the kitchen. He went to the fridge and peered inside. He had considered going straight to his room and getting into bed, but his stomach was telling him to get some food. He quickly threw together a lunch meat sandwich and in just a few bites had polished it off. He drank down a glass of milk and then fixed a second sandwich. "What the fuck are you doing?" Frank's voice said from behind Devyn. Devyn turned blinking in the sudden light from overhead. Frank had flipped the lights on when he entered the room. "Dad, I um," Devyn said. "How dare you break into my house and start eating my food," Frank said, talking over Devyn. "Dad please. I don't have anywhere else to go," Devyn said his voice trembling. "Don't call me Dad. I don't have a son," Frank said, his voice cold as the weather outside. The words hurt Devyn worse than anything he had felt before. He could feel the tears burning behind his eyes. He pushed them back willing himself not to cry. "Dad please don't do this to me," he said. "I thought I made myself clear that you are not welcome here," Frank said. "Do you know what my wife feels like after what you did in our house? Do you know how sickened we both are by you?" "Dad," Devyn broke off. He could not call this man Dad anymore. "I cannot change who I am. I can't make myself be something I'm not." "You have chosen a perverted lifestyle," Frank said. "You have decided to be some sort of sick pervert." "I could lie to you," Devyn began. "I could tell you that I'm not gay. I could tell you that it would never happen again. I could lie to you, like I have lied to myself in the past but I cannot change who I am." "You have chosen to be a pervert," Frank said. "I have no idea why you chose this." "It isn't a choice," Devyn said. "I tried to fight this. I tried to deny who I am but I can't be something I'm not." "You are disgusting," Frank said. "I think you have the wrong idea of what gay men are like," Devyn said. "I don't care what your kind is like," Frank said, cutting off Devyn's words. "I don't want you here. Now get your stuff and get out. I'll be getting the locks changed first thing Monday, so don't bother coming back." Devyn hung his head before he said, "I don't have anywhere to go." Devyn's voice cracked as he studied the linoleum covered floor. His tears once again threatening to pour out of his eyes. "That is not my problem," Frank said. "That is your problem. Go stay with your little queer friend or those two fairies you liked so much at the construction site." "Please, please let me stay here," Devyn said. "Please let me sleep in my room." Devyn's voice was thick with the tears he was holding back. He was almost begging for his Dad to let him sleep under the only roof he had known. "You have no room here," Frank said. "You have no bed here. You have nothing here. Now get out." Frank's voice was getting louder, his temper starting to show. Devyn could see the coldness in his dad's eyes. He had not known his father could be this heartless. He had not known his dad would do this to his own kid. "I can't believe you are doing this to me," he said. Devyn finished the last few bites of his sandwich having to force himself to swallow down the food. His throat felt as if it were closing. He was surprised he was able to force the food down. He drank the last of the milk and grabbed his backpack. He started towards the door and paused and asked, "Can, can I at least have, have some money?" Frank laughed in his face. His eyes glinting in the bright light of the kitchen. "Why would I give some fucking little queer money?" he said. Devyn dropped his head again and headed for the door. His only possessions, the ones he now carried in his backpack and on his body. His only family...well now he had no family. He still had no idea where he was going to go. He had no idea what he would do now. He only knew that he was not going to be able to go back home ever again. # # # "I am so sorry Devyn," Joe said. His hand was rubbing Devyn's leg as he sat there listening. "I considered going over to Brent's," Devyn said, his eyes barely keeping back the tears. "I thought maybe I could get his attention and he would let me in for the night. It was obvious that Brent's parents were not accepting him being gay either. I did not want to cause him more problems. I really only wanted to know he was still my friend." "So, you didn't go over there?" Joe asked. "No," Devyn answered. "I still loved Brent and did not want to cause him any problems with his folks." "You are so damn loyal," Joe said, as he was squeezing Devyn's bare leg. "I'm just stupid," Devyn said. "All I did was screw up everyone's life." "No," Joe said sharply. "They screwed up yours. They messed up and not you. Loving someone is never wrong." Devyn sat in silence letting Joe's words sink in. He wanted Joe to be right. He wanted it to be true, but he just was not sure it was. Copyright 2020 by Keith yates (keith.96@att.net) all rights reserved. No copying, reposting, or distributing is permitted without the author's written consent. After making your donation to Nifty don't forget how important your right to vote is. If you are in the United States check out: https://www.vote.org/ Remember that men and women have given their lives protecting your freedoms. 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