Date: Sun, 22 Nov 2020 02:12:46 -0600 From: Keith Yates Subject: Devyn's Struggle V2-33 This is a fictional story that might involve sexual acts between two or more men. If this offends you, then please do not read any further. If you are under the legal age to read sexually explicit material then do not read any further. This story in no way represents any person living or dead. Any resemblance to any real person is purely coincidental. This story is the property of the author and no copying or posting to any other website is permitted without the author's written consent. Please help keep Nifty going by donating to the awesome service. http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture. Thomas Paine Devyn's Struggle Chapter 33 Devyn felt as though his and Joe's talk last night had pushed things back into perspective. He knew that he still had things to work through, where Brent was concerned, but he also knew that Joe was there to support him. Even if Joe was with Ethan, he still had Joe as a friend and mentor. Devyn came downstairs to find Ethan in the kitchen, fixing breakfast. The college guy looked like he knew his way around a kitchen. "Good morning," Devyn said. "Ah good morning," Ethan said. "I hope you are hungry. I am fixing eggs, sausage and toast." "I'm starving," Devyn said. "Good," Ethan said. "How did you sleep?" Devyn asked. "Great," Ethan said. "Joe isn't a bed hog?" Devyn asked. "Nope he is a good bed companion," Ethan said. "Yeah, I bet he is," Devyn said, feeling a stab of jealousy that he quickly pushed down. "What are you two talking about?" Joe said coming into the kitchen. "Just you," Ethan said and intercepted Joe on the way to the coffee pot. He pulled him into a tight hug and kissed his sexy lips. "Didn't you two do enough of that last night?" Devyn teased. "There is never enough of that," Ethan said while looking into Joe's blue eyes. Ethan dished up breakfast and the three of them sat in silence for a while. It was nice to just relax, eat and slowly start the day. "I had better get going," Ethan said. "I have to work today and I don't want to get caught speeding again." "When did you get caught speeding?" Joe asked. "On the way here," Ethan said. "I have a heavy foot. I'll have to watch it." Ethan turned to Devyn. "When does school start?" "Soon," Devyn answered. "We got a few weeks left." "I have about the same," Ethan said. "Then I will lose most of my free time." "Do you have a heavy load?" Joe asked. "You should know," Ethan said. "I should," Joe said a bit puzzled. "Did you tell me the classes you were taking?" "Oh, you meant my classes," Ethan said innocently. "I thought you were talking about that other load. That big load that you had a hand in." "You are impossible," Joe said. "You just need to be more specific," Ethan said. "Oh, I am sure you would still find some way to pervert it," Joe said and shook his head, grinning. "Well," Ethan said getting up and taking his dishes to the sink. "I had better get going." "I'll take care of the dishes," Devyn volunteered. "Thanks," Ethan said. "Will you be back out this week?" Joe asked. "Um, I don't know," Ethan said. "I'm trying to get in a lot of hours before the semester starts. I will try though." "I hope you can," Joe said and got up from the table to walk with Ethan to the door. "If not, I'll definitely make it out Friday or Saturday," Ethan said. "I'll stay over again...if that is ok." "It is definitely ok with me," Joe said and he pulled Ethan in for a long kiss. His hands sliding up and down the younger man's back and down to grip that hot butt. "I will have another heavy load to take care of by then. Hopefully, you will have one too." "Oh, I will," Ethan said. "I have an idea or two on how we can merge those loads." "Mmmm," Joe said and kissed Ethan again. "Um, guys," Devyn said from the kitchen sink "I am still in the room." "Oh," Ethan said. "Feeling left out?" Ethan darted across the room and kissed Devyn on the lips. It was a short peck compared to what Ethan and Joe had shared. "Um, I wasn't expecting that," Devyn said blushing "You are so damn cute." Ethan reached out and playfully tapped Devyn's nose. Ethan could tell the guy was feeling better and he was glad of that. Devyn was important to Joe and Ethan was starting to have big brother feelings for the younger man. "Yes, he is," Joe said. Then he crossed the room and kissed Devyn too. "Shit," Devyn said. "What has gotten into you two...No don't answer that. I have some idea what got into you two last night." The three of them laughed and then Ethan said again he had to go and rushed out the door. He threw gravel as he took off towards the road and then the highway. "He does have a heavy foot," Joe said and sighed. "Are you going to be ok?" Devyn said. "I mean without him here, to, um, take care of your load?" "Hey," Joe said. "Crossing a line." "Um, buddy," Devyn said. "I think that line got crossed a while back." Joe laughed. "Yeah, I guess it did." * * * Joe set about getting the baler ready for putting up hay. He was going to try and get a second cutting done. He always liked having extra just in case it was a hard winter. He then gave Devyn a crash course on how to load the twine and operate the baler. Devyn never thought he would enjoy all this manual labor, but it was turning out he did. Working with Joe kind of reminded Devyn of all those trips he took to his Dad's work sites. When Devyn was young, his dad was just another guy on the crew. Then he moved up until that last year he was the boss. Devyn still remembered the fun he had at some of those sites when he was little. He took his set of toy dump trucks, tractors and semi-trailers to the site and played for hours in the loose dirt while his Dad worked. He was remembering how his mom had tossed a fit when he came home covered in dirt and mud. His Dad and he had just laughed. Later he went to the sites and helped his Dad with some of the manual labor. Since he had been too young to have a driver's license, his Dad never let him drive any of the equipment. His Dad had also not been big on telling Devyn why stuff was done the way it was. Joe on the other hand explained everything, even the reason behind why they greased this part first or connected this hose last. Devyn liked knowing there were reasons for doing something in an order other than just "because I said". Joe's friend Lee came out to the farm a couple nights during the week. He helped them haul hay in from the field. Devyn knew they would be seeing more of Lee as the harvest started. Lee helped Joe a lot last year. Devyn had been too caught up in drinking and smoking pot with Dewayne and Terry and did not really give Joe the help he should have. Devyn vowed to make up for it this year. Thinking about Dewayne and Terry reminded Devyn that he had outed himself this summer. He knew Dewayne and Terry were going to give him a bad time. He was sure Dewayne would want to get even for the bloody nose Devyn had given him. * * * One morning before they started their day, Devyn decided to bring up the topic. He thought he had better let Joe know a little of the new situation Devyn was going to be in this year. They were sitting in the kitchen drinking their morning cups of coffee. It was nice to sit there and talk during the early morning. In some ways Devyn found this the most intimate part of their day. It was when they would often talk about the hard stuff. It had been during the early morning when Devyn had come in from that all-night drinking and smoking that he had really opened up to Joe and let him know how bad he was hurting inside. Devyn could still feel the man holding him and the feeling of safety that being in those strong arms had given him. That had been the catalyst Devyn had needed. "Um, Joe," Devyn said. "I think there is something I need to tell you." Joe picked up on the serious tone in Devyn's voice. He gave Devyn his full attention. "It sounds serious." "It kind of is," Devyn said. "If you are going to tell me that you are gay," Joe said. "News flash, I know." "Well, I am sure you do," Devyn said. "After all, I did try to get into your pants the first day we met. But it does kind of touch on that." "You being gay or getting into my pants," Joe asked. "Me being gay," Devyn said. "Something happened at Julie's party earlier this summer," Devyn began. "I planned to tell you but then Hannah's accident and everything...well it didn't seem that important." "But now," Joe prompted when Devyn paused. "Well I think it is something you should know," Devyn said and paused again. "Just in case you get some fallout from it. I never meant to cause you any trouble. I hope you know that." "This sounds really big," Joe said. "It might not be," Devyn said. "I might be making it out to be bigger than it is. It is just... well at Julie's party Dewayne and Terry showed up. They were causing a problem so I was trying to get them to leave. I didn't want them to screw up Julie's party." "Did you go off drinking with them?" Joe asked. He was sure Devyn had not had anything to drink or smoke all summer. Joe was satisfied that Devyn had managed to overcome some of the demons from the past. "No nothing like that." Devyn was worried that Joe would think he had been trying to hide something. He had truly not given it much thought with everything else that had been going on during the summer. He took a deep breath before continuing. Devyn said. "But they wanted me to leave Julie's party and go with them. They were quite insistent and causing a scene and stuff was said. I got mad and, well I think I broke DeWayne's nose. He was bleeding everywhere." "Shit," Joe said. "There is a little more. Dewayne called me a... a... well faggot and that was when I hit him. I said something like ?and this faggot is about to kick your ass.? I basically came out right there to everyone at Julie's party. I could have just blown it off as the heat of the moment but my friends asked. I did not want to lie to them. I didn't want to hide it any longer." "Damn Devyn," Joe said. "What a way to make a statement." "It was probably stupid." Devyn looked down into his coffee cup before looking back up and meeting Joe's eyes. He could see the caring in the depths of those blue pools. "But you know my friends; my real friends were fine with it." True friends can be like that," Joe said. "I told you once it was your decision and I would support it no matter what. I stand by that. Coming out is your choice and you should get to do it when you are ready and, in a way, that you want." "Well," Devyn said thoughtfully, "I kind of wish I had not done it quite like that but I am glad I did. I am glad that I don't have to pretend. I want to just be me. I want to just be Devyn. I don't want to pretend to be straight Devyn or gay Devyn. I just want to be me." "Then be you," Joe said. "I will back you up but..." "I knew there would be a but," Devyn said, "and not the good kind of butt." "I understand times are different than when I went through this." Joe could still remember the hardships he had endured after coming out. He could still remember how some people had treated him. He knew there were a few that still did not accept him. "It sounds like you have more support than I did which is great." "I have you," Devyn said and placed his hand on Joe's. "Yes, you do," Joe said and enclosed Devyn's hand in his own. "I still had a really rough time. There are some folks in this town that will never accept us. They will hate us for just being Joe and just being Devyn. I suspect that you will have a rougher year this year." "I know," Devyn said. "I suspect I'll take some crap for it. I am sure I will be called fruit, fairy, queer, homo, and fag. I think I can handle some name calling." "It might not just be from some kids." Joe was concerned that Devyn might be underestimating how hard life might be for a while. The boy might be able to handle name calling from some kids but how would he handle the attitude of adults. "Like I said there are some adults that are not too accepting. If anyone gives you too much shit, you let me know." "Sure," Devyn agreed but doubted he would need Joe's help with some name calling. "And I do love you kiddo," Joe said. "You are a hell of a man." "Um, thanks," Devyn said and felt his face blush. "Is there anything else I should know?" Joe asked. "Um, just one thing," Devyn said. "After I came out um another guy ... kind of ... possibly came out to me." "That is good," Joe said. He was glad that Devyn might be able to have another gay friend his own age. "Anyone I know?" "Yeah," Devyn said. "Um, you won't say anything right?" "You know very well that I would never out someone." Joe's voice conveyed his bit of annoyance. He knew Devyn knew him better than that. "Yes, I do," Devyn said feeling a bit stupid for having even voiced that random thought. "Um, well Charlie Atwood thinks he is gay." "Wow," Joe said. "I have known his family for a long time. I'm not sure exactly how they are going to take it. His Mom is open minded and I think his Dad is alright with other people being gay. He and I have never had a problem. It is simply different when it is your own son." "Well, the thing is," Devyn said. "I am not sure how he is taking it. We had like this brief special moment and then our summer went a little crazy. We only got to talk a few minutes this summer, you know when he and his Mom came out." "Yes, after the funeral," Joe said. "Right," Devyn said. "Then his grandparents gave him a trip to visit them in California. We haven't really had a chance to talk at all." "Wow," Joe said. "That is really getting away." "It was a surprise they gave him for his birthday. I am hoping when he gets back, we can talk more." "Well feel free to invite him out," Joe said. "He is a good kid. If he is gay and fighting it, he will need your support and understanding. Remember you cannot force it on him; you have to let him find his way through it." "I'll keep that in mind," Devyn said, "and thanks for being so understanding. You know, as it gets out that I am gay, people will talk about us. They will talk about you. I never wanted to cause you any problems. I know sometimes I have been a headache. But I don't know what would have happened to me without you and Hannah. I... I don't know how to say it..." Devyn's voice cracked, then he choked out "other than, I love you." Moving closer Joe pulled Devyn to his side. His strong arms were wrapping around the smaller man for a firm hug. His face pressed against Devyn's. "I love you too." Joe held Devyn for a long moment. "Sorry," Devyn said. "I don't know what has gotten into me lately. I'm a fucking mess." Devyn pulled back and hung his head trying to hide his emotions. Joe took Devyn's face into his hands and forced their eyes to meet. "You never have to hide from me," he said. "Having all of these feelings, having all of the caring you have inside of you is what drew Hannah and me to you. It is a good thing. Don't lose it." "Thanks," Devyn said and forced a grin. "I do want to be done with the emotions for a bit though." Devyn took a deep breath and let out some of his tension, "Again, I am sorry and I hope my coming out doesn't cause you problems." "Well, as for that," Joe said, shrugging. "I have been talked about before. People talking doesn't bother me. If they are talking about me, they are leaving someone else alone. The folks that really know me, know what kind of man I am. I am not worried about it." "But you know they may think," Devyn paused trying to decide exactly how to say it, "That we are, um, fucking." Blunt was the best way he decided. "That is one of the things that Dewayne and Terry were mouthing off at Julie's party." "Is that what started it," Joe asked, "them talking about us?" "It was a bunch of stuff," Devyn said. "But that was one of the things they were spouting." "Well lucky me," Joe said grinning. "I am an old man who has these two sexy hot guys. Between you and Ethan it is a wonder that I have any energy left for farming." "I'm glad you are taking it so well," Devyn said. "But it isn't a joke." "You know Hannah once asked me if you and I were, well to put in your words, fucking." "Really?" Devyn said shocked. "She thought you might be the right guy to bring me out of my shell," Joe said. "I hadn't really had a relationship in a long time. She knew in many ways you were no longer a kid. You might be only 16 years old, but emotionally, you are much more mature. She would never promote me, or anyone else, fooling around with a kid, but I think she knew that you were special and not really an innocent." "But you never considered it," Devyn said. "You never, um, wanted to go there with me. You know I would not mind at all." "I wanted and still want you to enjoy being a kid," Joe said. "I want you to experience those first times with someone. That was taken away from you and it was forced upon you. Being able to have it with someone might give you back some of what you missed out on." "I'll have to think about that," Devyn said. "But she was right," Joe said. "You did get me out of my self-imposed dry spell. You got me back out there and now there is Ethan." "Ethan is a good guy," Devyn said. "He balances you out. He is funny and goofy. It balances out your serious side." "Am I serious?" Joe asked. "You like being the adult and um, I guess I needed that," Devyn said. "I messed up a lot in the beginning. I didn't like myself. I also thought that you... well I thought that I could only be one thing and you showed me that isn't true." "You are so much more than just a hot piece of ass," Joe said. "Although after seeing it yesterday it is hot." "Stop teasing me," Devyn said his face burning slightly. "You need to look in the mirror," Joe said. "You have gotten so filled out and sexy over this last year. The change is amazing. You were so skinny this time last year. It was painful to look at. Now you are filled out and, well, hot." "But you are not interested," Devyn said. "Devyn, I can appreciate your sex appeal without acting on it. If I only wanted sex... well I still wouldn't have my eyes set on you because with you it would be much more than sex." "Anyway, back to where I was going with this," Devyn said. "People will think you and I are having sex. They are going to talk." "Let them talk," Joe said. "And again, the folks that matter know that is all just bullshit." "I hope one day I can be like that about everything," Devyn said. "It takes time," Joe said. "It wasn't easy for me. But know[1] all I can say is I don't have time for that. I have too much work to do and need to get to it." "We both need to get to it," Devyn said. "I just want to call Charlie first. I want to see if he is back and if he might want to come out this weekend or sometime before school starts. I would like to talk to him and find out where things stand with us...that is, if there is an us." "Ok," Joe said. "Make it quick. We do have a lot to do and we need to get it done while the weather is cooperating." "Will do," Devyn said and headed to the phone while Joe headed off to work. * * * Devyn did not get to talk to Charlie. He got Charlie's Mom again. She told Devyn he was due back tomorrow and that she would have Charlie call him. So, Devyn headed off to help Joe. Devyn tried calling Charlie the next night but found out that he was not home. He had gone off with his Dad to the hardware store. Charlie's dad owned the local hardware store and provided typical plumbing and repair services. "I think he tried calling you earlier today," she told Devyn. Devyn had been out in the barn with Joe trying to pull a calf. They had lost the calf and the cow was messed up. She was not able to get up again. Joe and Lee were going to turn her into hamburger and Devyn wanted no part of that. He headed to the house hoping to talk to Charlie."I was probably out working," Devyn said. "Just let Charlie know I called." Charlie's mom said she would. Devyn had no desire to see what Joe and Lee were doing so he decided to go hang with Travis for a little while. Devyn tried again the next night and the next night and kept missing Charlie. He wondered if he was ever going to talk to him before school started. He also wondered if Charlie was avoiding him. He wondered if maybe Charlie was regretting the talk they had after Julie's party. He wondered if maybe Charlie was reconsidering their friendship. * * * On Friday Lee came out. He and Joe were in the barn and Devyn tried calling Charlie again. He still did not get to talk to him. He went back to the barn to see what Joe and Lee were doing. "Why are you spreading straw all over the floor?" Devyn asked after watching the two for a few minutes. They had the round bales of straw against the walls and a very thick layer of straw on the floor between them. "Lee has agreed to help teach you," Joe said. "Teach me?" Devyn said looking from Lee to Joe and back again. "Just some self-defense," Lee said. "I'll be watching and giving pointers while Lee attacks you over and over again," Joe said. "I want you to know the best way to defend yourself. Just in case someone tries to harass you again. I don't want you to go around picking a fight..." "But he damn well wants you to finish it," Lee said. "Which is why I am here." "Do we bow to each other or anything?" Devyn asked moving into the makeshift ring. "Nope," Lee said. They circled each other and Joe watched as they moved. He gave Devyn pointers and how to use Lee's weight against him. Devyn ended up on the straw covered floor but by the end he was knocking Lee to the ground about half the time. He knew tomorrow he was going to be sore but it was kind of fun learning. Plus it was kind of nice getting to feel up Lee's lean sexy body. Devyn had never noticed before, how solid the guy was. There was a great deal of wiry strength under those clothes. "How did you learn all of this?" Devyn asked, as he and Lee took a break. Lee's shirt was damp and clung to his chest. The man's faded jeans were hugging him. Devyn likewise was damp with sweat. His long brown hair was dripping with perspiration. "I learned it somewhere along the way," Joe said. "Oh, don't give him that bull shit," Lee said. "When he was living out on his own, he worked for a former special ops guy. He learned all this stuff from him. I think Joe knows more ways to bring down an opponent than just about anyone." "He's exaggerating," Joe said. "He wasn't special ops." "Sure, he wasn't," Lee said his voice thick with sarcasm. "He just taught you how to shoot any kind of gun, hand to hand combat and some sort of crazy Asian martial arts that I still haven't found out the name for." Devyn looked from Lee to Joe. He could remember the battle in the barn with Tom. He had seen Joe using that pitchfork like it had been an extension of his own arm. "How much of that is true?" Devyn asked looking at Joe. "He is exaggerating but I did learn a few things," Joe said. "I have seen you fight," Lee said. "I have seen you take more than one guy to his knees." Devyn looked at Joe. He had a hard time seeing it. "I don't believe it." "Believe it," Lee said. Without any warning, Lee moved like a striking snake. He went for Joe. Joe moved instinctively. In only moments Lee was down on the floor, his arm behind his back. "Damn that hurts," Lee muttered. "Fuck!" Devyn felt a little awe at how quickly Joe had taken Lee down. Devyn had been sparring with the man for over an hour and knew how hard Lee's lean body was. He knew that the guy had a damn lot of muscle on that body. Plus, he knew Lee had to have some sort of self-defense training for his job as the town cop. "I didn't even see the move, it was so fast." "Watch the language," Joe said. "Remind me to never piss you off," Devyn said. Lee was up and brushing the straw from his clothes. "Damn Joe that fuckin' hurt." "Don't do it again then," Joe said. "And sorry. I forgot to hold back." "Bullshit," Lee said. "You knew exactly what you were doing." "You're right," Joe said. "I just like having you down with your ass in the air." "Well just ask next time," Lee said. "Next time I'll just turn and bend over." "Wow," Joe said. "I didn't know you were that easy." "Fuck you," Lee said laughing. "Well I had better get home. I have been gone just long enough to piss Melissa off again. Plus, I think the kid has learned enough for one day." "I think he has some basics now," Joe said. "It is a good start." Copyright 2020 by Keith yates (keith.96@att.net) all rights reserved. Reason obeys itself; and ignorance submits to whatever is dictated to it. Thomas Paine He that would make his own liberty secure, must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty, he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself. Thomas Paine