Date: Mon, 13 Apr 2020 10:27:39 -0500 From: Keith Yates Subject: Devyn's Struggle V2 08 This is a fictional story involving sexual acts between two or more men. If this offends you, why are you here? If you are under the legal age to read sexually explicit material, then do not read any further. This story in no way represents any person living or dead. Any resemblance to any real person is purely coincidental. The story is the property of the author and should not be reposted or reproduced without the author's written consent. Some of you will recognize this story. It was removed from Nifty in January 2020. It was still a work in process so I decided to make a few revisions to it. Hopefully you will find them positive changes. I hope everyone is enjoying the new version of Devyn's Struggle. I have only gotten a little feedback and it has all been positive. I'm going to try and keep posting these first chapters frequently. Please keep reading and stay home. Let's bend the curve. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on this new version. Let me know if you think I am heading in a good direction for this story. You can also check out the companion story to this called Brent's Struggle. The two stories may end up crossing paths again in the future. I will have to see where things go. You can e-mail me at keith.96@att.net with your feedback. Please help keep Nifty going by donating to the awesome service. http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html Devyn's Struggle V2 Chapter 8 Devyn watched the rows of corn and soybeans flying past the truck window. He was still finding it hard to believe he was moving to a farm and would be living with this stranger. Devyn looked at Joe sitting behind the wheel driving the truck down the country roads. Devyn thought again how attractive the man was. His arms and chest filled out every inch of the western style shirt. Devyn had also noticed how well the man filled out the wrangler jeans. The jeans were tight in all of the right places. Why the man was not married Devyn had no idea. "You alright?" Joe asked. "Um, yeah," Devyn said looking away. "You look a little pale," Joe said. "I think something I ate isn't agreeing with me," Devyn said. He had not been feeling quite right since yesterday. He had been assuming that it had a lot to do with all the stress of being arrested and the court. "You have been thru a lot," Joe said reaching over and giving the teenager's shoulder a squeeze. Joe's touch felt reassuring to Devyn. It felt like this man, this almost total stranger, cared. Joe might be more caring than the parents that had walked out on him. Devyn could not deny that he felt a connection to Joe. The connection had been there almost from the first minute Joe had sat on that bench in the police station. "It had been like that with Brent and Matt," Devyn thought. Devyn's mind drifted back as he watched the green fields pass by the window. He thought about Brent and Matt. He wondered just how things were going for the two. Devyn and Brent had not talked about how things had gone between them and the girls. Part of Devyn wanted to know if Brent had gone all the way with Tracy. Part of him wanted to know if Brent had climaxed and part of him did not want to know. The was a part of him that was jealous that Tracy could enjoy Brent's touch without any fear. Part of him was jealous that Tracy could have what he couldn't. He wanted to feel Brent's body against him. He wanted Brent's lips on his. He wanted to hold Brent's teenage equipment and make the other guy squirt. Plus, he wanted that too. He wanted Brent's hands on his body. He wanted Brent to stroke him and make him cum. Devyn pulled his mind away from his thoughts of Brent and sex, and back to his father who was sitting in the truck next to him. They were on the way to the construction site. Frank was explaining to Devyn what he wanted Devyn to do while Frank was finishing up some paperwork. "I know it sounds boring," Frank was saying, "but it will help me out. The guys just never put anything back in the right places. It will be good if everything is ready to go come Monday. We are already a little behind on this job." "No problem Dad," Devyn said. "It sounds easy enough." "Maybe this summer I can get you on as part of the summer crew," Frank said. "It would be nice to have my kid there by my side." "Yeah," Devyn said. "That would be cool." "You can let me know what the guys really think of the boss," Frank said. "Dad," Devyn said a little annoyed. "I don't want to be some snitch." Frank chuckled at his son's protest. "I never would have wanted to snitch either." "Then just a regular guy as part of the crew?" Devyn prodded. "Yeah," Frank said. "I can probably get Vince to show you the ropes. He would be a good one to teach you the ins and outs. Plus, he won't cut you any slack for being my kid." "Sounds great," Devyn said his voice tinged with just a hint of sarcasm that Frank missed as they were pulling into the parking lot. They pulled into the parking lot next to another truck. As he pushed the truck's gear into park, Devyn heard his Dad swear. "What's wrong?" Devyn asked. "Oh, that fucking faggot is here. Why the hell he has to be here on a Saturday...the pervert seems to be here all the damn time. No matter what we do we cannot get rid of the queer." Devyn was a little shocked at Frank's tone and swear words. He had heard his dad use some foul language before but not with that tone and not quite so prominently. "You mean that guy you fired is still working here?" Devyn was surprised. He knew that his Dad had fired the guy. Devyn wondered if he would run into him. Would he have a chance to talk to him? Would Matt even want to talk to him after the last time? Devyn knew from last time and Frank's words this time that there was no way Frank was going to accept Matt. Devyn did not understand why his dad hated Matt so much. What part of Matt being gay would interfere with Matt's work? "The fucker has a signed contract," Frank said. We cannot get rid of is faggot ass. We are stuck with the little queen." Matt had seemed perfectly normal. He had seemed like a guy that could pull his weight on the job. Matt had had the build for a construction worker. Oh, he wasn't as built as a couple of the guys, but the man had broad shoulders, defined arms and chest and filled out a pair of Jeans real nicely. At least that was how Devyn remembered him in his mind's eye. Devyn swallowed before bravely saying, "Well, he seemed okay to me." "What!" Frank barked with sudden shock in his tone. Devyn could hear the disbelief in his father's voice. "I um, well, he seemed nice when we talked." "He seemed nice," Frank almost shouted and then in a calmer voice he repeated, "he seemed nice. Fuck Devyn he wanted in your pants. Don't you understand that? He is sick. He is a pervert. You need to just stay away from his kind. You don't want to have anything to do with him." "I don't think he is like that," Devyn said. "I mean, he seemed fairly normal." "Don't give me that shit," frank said. "He is a queer. You don't want to have anything to do with someone like that." "Dad," Devyn said, "he is still a person whether he is gay or not. I don't understand..." "You don't have to understand," Frank said cutting off Devyn's words. "It is not normal for a guy to want...what he does. Just put him out of your mind he is not worth thinking about. Now come on and I will show you what I want you to do while I do that paperwork." Inside the tool shed Devyn worked on putting everything back into place. It was obvious that on Fridays the crew was eager to go and almost just threw stuff in here. Devyn set about putting tools away and sorting thru totes and boxes to make sure everything had all the equipment needed for Monday morning. He looked at the clipboard and inventoried everything to make sure he didn't miss a tool or supplies that needed to be in the crate. His mind was lost in the thoughts of Brent and their desires for each other. He could not help but keep coming back to what he knew was his inner desire. He wondered if there would ever be a chance to talk to Matt about this sort of stuff. He knew he could not talk to his dad. He wondered if Matt had struggled with this inner battle. Matt saw the kid working in the tool shed. He had picked up on a vibe from the young man and on some level, he felt a connection with the kid. He glanced at the office and knew that Frank could not see them here. Stepping up to the door, he was greeted by the site of the teenager's hot butt. Smiling Matt wondered if this kid knew just how damn desirable, he was. "If I was younger and not married, I would definitely be into that," he thought. Aloud he said, "Hello!" Devyn jumped at the sound of the voice. He had been lost in his thoughts and the tasks that he had not known anyone was there. "Oh, um, hi," he said turning to face Matt. "Sorry," Matt said. "I didn't mean to startle you." "Oh um, I was just um..." Devyn was glancing around nervously hoping his Dad wouldn't see him talking to Matt. "Don't worry about your Dad," Matt said. "He's in his office. He can't see us from here, but I will go if you want me to go." Devyn did not want his dad to find him with Matt, but he also wanted to talk to the guy. Maybe Matt could help him make sense of what was going on inside. "Um, no, that is okay. I um need a break anyway. I um hope it won't get you into any trouble though." Matt thought it was sweet that the kid did not want him to get into trouble. "I can handle it," Matt said. "I'm more concerned about you getting into trouble." "Um, no I'm fine," Devyn said. "But you and my dad and the guys, um the probably already give you crap." Devyn didn't know why he was stuttering, and he kept glancing around. He clutched the clipboard tighter to try and calm down. "Don't worry about it Devyn," Matt said stepping into the shed. "I can handle anything any of the guys here can dish out." There was a long silence and Matt could tell that Devyn wanted to talk, but he was not sure how to get the young man to open up to him. He decided to just ask him questions and see if maybe Devyn would take the conversation in the direction he wanted when he was ready. "How has school been going?" Matt asked. "Fine," Devyn said. "You seemed to be interested in architecture the last time we talked," Matt said. "Is that something you might want to do when you get out of high school?" "I don't really know," Devyn said. "It is something I have always kind of been interested in. I like history and the old buildings." "It is never too early to start thinking about where you want to go in life," Matt said. "I'm sure you will be going to college." "I'm just trying to make it thru high school," Devyn said. "I'm only a freshman and college seems so far away." "You should keep your grades up," Matt said. "Take all the math classes so you can keep your options open." "I, um, don't really know," Devyn said. "My dad was just talking about me getting on with the crew this summer. He's done fine without college." "Yeah, he has," Matt said. "You might be able to do even better with a degree." "Sure," Devyn said. College was not what was on Devyn's mind. He had questions to ask Matt and it had nothing to do with school or careers. "Um, Matt, can I ask you something?" "Sure." Matt responded. "Um, what's it like being gay?" Devyn asked and felt his face grow warm. "Oh, wow man," Matt said. He had kind of known that this was the direction the conversation would go. "You ask the hard questions, don't you?" "Sorry," Devyn said looking down at the dirty floor. "You don't have to answer that. It's a dumb question." Matt moved closer to Devyn and took a seat next to the teenager on the crate the kid had just finished packing. "I don't mind answering, but it is different for every gay guy or gay woman. I mean it is about as unique as each person is." "You don't think it's a dumb question?" Devyn asked his brown eyes finally meeting Matt's brilliant Green. "No," Matt said reassuring the teen. "I'm glad you feel you can ask me." "Thanks," Devyn said. "Does everyone treat you the way my Dad does? Is everyone as..." Devyn's voice trailed off not putting into words the way his father treated Matt. "A lot of people are closed minded about being gay," Matt said. "A great deal of them do not want to even try to understand and tolerate anything that doesn't fit into their definition of normal." "So, it is rough not being normal?" Devyn asked. "Devyn," Matt's voice took a serious tone. "I am normal. I am still just as much of a person as you are as your Dad is. I have the same feelings, the same hopes, the same dreams as most other men." "Sorry. I didn't mean..." Devyn said trying to apologize. "It's okay," Matt said reaching over and giving Devyn's shoulder a squeeze. "I'm just curious about what it is like," Devyn said. "I mean I don't know much about being gay or anything. Just by what I've seen on TV." "Well," Matt said crossing his arms across his broad chest, "TV tends to take everything to the extreme. I mean some gay guys do act as flaming as they portray on TV, but just as many if not more act pretty much like I do. Some gay guys like to watch sports, play sports and generally kick back and relax and have a beer just like straight guys do. Of course, there are those gay guys that like to dress up in drag and put on a show." "See, I don't understand why a guy wants to do that," Devyn said. "I don't have any desire to dress up like a girl." "Oh, does that mean you have some other gay tendencies?" Matt said watching the teenagers face closely for his response. "What! No, no I aint. I mean no I didn't mean that the way it sounded. Shit no!" Devyn flared up while trying to cover up his slip. "Hey calm down," Matt said evenly. "I didn't mean to accuse you of anything." Devyn took a deep breath before saying, "sorry. I didn't mean to snap like that. I um, just don't want you to get the wrong idea." Matt looked directly into Devyn's soft brown eyes. "Devyn, it's okay to be gay," Matt said. "It isn't something you have to hide from. For me, being gay is part of me, but it doesn't define me. It's a small part that helps to make up the whole person. It doesn't control your life or your future." "Have you tried to be nor..." Devyn said and his voice trailed off as he stopped himself from using the word normal. "I mean have you tried to be straight?" Devyn said and knew he sounded stupid. "When I was younger," Matt said, "I dated a couple of girls, but I never felt for them what I seemed to feel for guys. I was probably about your age when I gave up trying to be something I wasn't and became myself." "But how did you know you were gay?" Devyn asked. "What was it that made you realize that you weren't straight?" "Well," Matt said, "the big thing was that when I was around girls, I didn't have any real sexual attraction to them. Plus, there were some guys I knew that I did have a great deal of sexual attraction for. I seemed to connect with guys on a different level than girls. I wanted to touch them and kiss them and well do a lot more with them than I ever did with any girl. "If I tell you something," Devyn said, "can you keep it just between . . . the two of us? I mean not tell my Dad." "Yes," Matt said glad that the boy was trusting him, "anything you tell me will stay right here, but I have one stipulation. If I believe that telling your Dad might keep you from harm, then I will tell him. I won't let something happen to you because I kept quiet when I shouldn't have." Devyn thought about Matt's stipulation for a long moment before he began speaking again. "I have been dating this girl for a while now. The other night we um, we um..." "You had sex," Matt supplied. "Yeah," Devyn said looking down. He felt a little embarrassed, but he wanted to talk to someone. She thought it was great. She thought I was great." Matt watched the kid's face grow redder as he talked. He understood how embarrassing it could be to talk to someone about sex. He kept quiet and let Devyn proceed at his own pace. "I um didn't enjoy it as much as she did," Devyn said. "I um, I didn't um, you know." "You didn't cum." Matt supplied. "Yeah," Devyn agreed. Matt's large strong hand moved to the back of Devyn's neck. He felt the soft hair and then soft skin as he was gently massaging the tension he found in Devyn's neck. "Don't be embarrassed Devyn," Matt said. "All guys need someone to talk to about this stuff. It can be pretty much impossible to talk to a parent about sex and sometimes friends don't always have the experience to help when it comes to some of these things." "Do you think there is something wrong with me?" Devyn asked looking into Matt's face. I mean what kind of guy can't cum?" "It could've been nerves. Was it your first time?" Matt asked. "Yeah, it was," Devyn answered honestly. "Then it was probably just nerves," Matt supplied. Normally at your age guys could hump a tree and shoot a load." Devyn was shocked by Matt's bluntness, but he also felt good that this guy was being straight with him about this topic. "Do you think I might be, that I could be, that maybe I am..." Devyn was afraid to say the word. He was afraid that using the term gay would make it true about himself. "Gay," Matt said filling in the blank for the struggling teenager. "Only you can answer that question. Only you can look into your heart and see what is there." Devyn hesitated before saying, "I have a friend, a really good friend. We do just about everything together and sometimes when I am around him, when we are around each other..." "Yes," Matt prompted. Devyn looked down at the floor before continuing, "We um, we get hard and um, we have um..." "You can say whatever it is you want Devyn," Matt said. "I will not be shocked. Remember I am gay and have done just about everything you can imagine with my partner." "What have you done?" Devyn asked wanting to move the topic off him and Brent and onto Matt. Matt smiled down at the boldness. "That's a very personal question. I'm not sure it would be appropriate of me to answer it. I mean what we do in our bedroom or our bathroom or our kitchen or our...well you get the idea." Matt's eyes were grinning when Devyn looked up into them. He could tell the other guy was teasing him and that Matt wasn't offended by what Devyn had asked. "Well, Brent, that's my friend's name, we have um kind of shot with each other. The first time it was completely accidental...or well unexpected. But we both liked it so much and we have um...we um...gawd you can't tell anyone this, but we kissed." Matt's lips twitched at the corners. The kid was more worried about someone finding out that the two had kissed than that they had shot their loads together. Maybe for these two the kissing is more intimate than the jerking off or whatever it was the two had done. "Oh, I see. Well, you and Brent must be very close if you are working through these feelings together." "So, am I? Am I like you?" Devyn asked struggling. "Do you mean gay?" Matt asked for clarification. "Yes," Devyn said softly "you know," Matt began. "I felt a vibe the first time we met. It told me you were a special kid and I felt a connection so maybe you are," Matt said watching the teen closely. "But really only you can answer that question. You have to look inside and see what is in here." Matt tapped Devyn's chest above the teenager's heart. "of course, you and Brent could just be experimenting, which is completely normal for a guy your age." Matt's voice was steady as he spoke. He understood that Devyn was struggling with his sexuality and had no one else to turn to for help with it. "I don't want to be gay...I don't want to be." Devyn's voice was firm but there was confusion in his eyes. "I know you don't," Matt said. "I didn't want to be either, but now I wouldn't change if I could." "You wouldn't?" Devyn said more than a bit surprised. "Nope," Matt said. "Why not?" Devyn asked Matt. Devyn couldn't understand a reason why Matt would not change to be straight to be like the other guys. "Because if I wasn't gay," Matt said honestly, "then I wouldn't have Bryan, and I love him. I wouldn't give him up for anything. He is my other half. He has completed me like no one else could. He is my soul mate." "Wow!" Devyn said amazed. "But wouldn't it be easier for you if you weren't gay? Wouldn't it make life simpler if Bryan was a woman and you could have children and a family?" "If Bryan was a woman, then he wouldn't be Bryan," Matt said. "I love Bryan as he is. I love him with all my heart flaws and all. As far as the family, well Bryan is my family and if we want children, then we will find a way to have them." "Really?" Devyn was still having trouble wrapping his mind around the idea of Matt not wanting to be straight. "Yes," Matt said. "if we decide we want to expand our family, then we will. We can either find someone willing to carry one of our babies or we can adopt. There are lots of ways to have children and family." "I guess so." Devyn's voice was soft as he tried to compile all the information he was getting. "Family is more than just blood you know," Matt said. "It is more than just a man and a woman. Family is having people around you that you love. It is letting those people into your heart and letting them love you." "I guess so," Devyn said. "I um, just don't know. I don't know what I feel. I don't know how I am supposed to feel." "Devyn," Matt said, "you are supposed to feel exactly how you feel." Matt grasped Devyn's shoulder firmly. He was squeezing the teenager's shoulder as he was speaking. His heart was going out to this young man who was feeling so many things that Matt himself had once felt. He wanted to help him, but he knew that Only Devyn could figure out his heart. Only Devyn could find the path that would lead him to his future. "You are young Devyn. You have plenty of time to figure out who you are and where you want to go. I know your body is sending surges into your brain, but you don't have to act upon them until you are ready. Take it just one day at a time for now. Give yourself time to come to terms with your own sexual orientation." "You are a great guy Matt," Devyn said. "I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me. I, um, don't know how to thank you." "You just did," Matt said smiling into Devyn's warm face. "This kid is really going to be a heart breaker," Matt thought as the boy reached up and pushed the thick chocolate brown hair back out of his eyes. On an impulse, Devyn moved close to Matt and slid his arms around the man. His face was against Matt as he hugged the caring man. "Thanks," Devyn said as he held the hard body of the warm man. "You are welcome," Matt said returning Devyn's hug. His arms went around the boy and held him for a moment. Matt could feel the warm sensation of caring for this kid. He was glad he had met Devyn. He was glad they had found each other and that maybe Matt had been able to help Devyn understand himself better. "Just what the fuck is going on here?" Frank bellowed from behind them. "Dad, I um, we um, were, um," Devyn didn't know how to explain what they had been doing. He could only see the fury on Frank's face. Matt released Devyn and turned to face Frank. He saw the red face, the vane on Frank's forehead pulsing with the man's anger. Matt purposely placed himself in front of Devyn. There was no doubt in Matt's mind that if Frank had a gun, he would have shot Matt. "Your son and I were just talking," Matt said. "That didn't fucking look like talking to me," Frank practically shouted. His voice echoing off the walls. "That looked like you were trying to rape my son. I think you're fucking trying to use my kid to satisfy your perverted needs." "Dad, that isn't..." Devyn tried to explain but was cut off. Frank didn't hear Devyn or let him finish speaking. His eyes were filled with what he thought of as an un-natural sight. His blood was rapidly pulsing through is vanes and his blood pressure was through the roof. "I want you off my fucking job site," Frank shouted. "I want your queer ass off my site right now." "Okay, Okay," Matt said. "I don't want to cause Devyn any problems. Just relax Frank." "Get out of here," Frank was shouting and pointing to the left. "Get the fuck out of here." Matt began to leave. He hesitated only a moment or two to look Devyn in the eyes. If the kid was scared of his father's rage, he wasn't showing it. Matt didn't want to leave Devyn alone with Frank. He was scared for the kid, but his presence would only enraged Frank more. Devyn tried to pretend that everything was okay. He was worried for matt. His father seemed to be a completely different person right then. It was a person Devyn did not know and had never suspected even existed. He could not believe that Frank took the moment when Matt and he were hugging to come across them. Devyn still did not know why he had hugged the man. It had just felt right to him. Matt was being so understanding that Devyn wanted to express how comfortable Matt made him feel. Devyn knew he had been stupid for doing it. He did not know where his brain was sometimes. Frank moved closer to Devyn. He seemed to loom feet above his son. His eyes were blazing with a mixture of disgust and hatred. "I told you," Frank said lecturing Devyn and pointing his finger at the teenager. "I fucking told you to keep away from that pervert. I warned you about what he is and then I find you like that. My son will not be some fucking faggot. You will not talk to him ever again. You will not ever see him again. Am I making myself clear? Devyn wasn't exactly afraid of his father. He didn't believe that his father would hit him. Devyn could see something in Frank's eyes, though, something that he didn't understand. He could not help but wonder that if his father believe Devyn was gay, their father and son relationship would be over. Losing his father's love was the thing that Devyn was fearing the most. He was not sure he could handle knowing that Frank despised him as much as the man seemed to despise Matt. "Okay Dad," Devyn said. "There was really nothing going on you know. "Devyn's voice was soft and mild, and it helped calm down his father. "I just don't want you turning out like that, that, person," Frank said. "Do you really think being gay is a choice he made?" Devyn asked although he suspected the answer. "Of course, it is," Frank said. His voice was soft now as he was calming down. "He isn't normal. He is a freak. He will burn in hell one day for the things he has done." Frank's voice showed that the man had no doubt about the fate of Matt's soul. "Were almost there," Joe said as he was turning onto a gravel road. Joe's voice brought Devyn back to the present. He looked over at Joe and again marveled at the attractiveness of this man. He wondered if his father was right. He wondered if Matt and people like him would be punished for being the way they were. He wondered if he would be punished for having done the things he had done with Brent. It did not seem to matter to Joe that Devyn was gay. He had warned him about being out in this small town. He thought playing it straight was the right answer. No one needed to know that he was a twisted pervert. "Sorry if I woke you," Joe said watching the kid sitting up more in the truck seat and looking out the window. Devyn knew he should have been paying more attention to where they were going. He looked at the green hills and trees on the left of the road. There were cows grazing in the field. "I was just thinking," he said. Seeing where Devyn was looking, Joe said, "That's my pasture there. I have 100 head of cows over there." "Wow," Devyn said. Joe's lips turned up at the corners. The kid seemed impressed with cows. "This is mine too," Joe said indicating the wheat field on the other side of the road. "Um," Devyn began, "it looks like a lot." "It is for one guy," Joe said. "I'm hoping you will be interested in pitching in and helping." "Sure," Devyn said. "It can be relaxing watching the cows and calves," Joe said. "I do some of my best thinking that way." Devyn was not sure how to respond to that. He had never been on a farm before. He had never been around farm animals before. It was going to be a new world for him. The road got narrower where it was just wide enough for the truck. It went up and down several hills and then came to a bridge. It had rusty sides and crossed a fast-flowing stream. Devyn saw a house up on the hill. Joe turned into the driveway that ran up the hill. The house was surrounded by tall trees that looked to be hundreds of years old. Their trunks were bigger around than anything Devyn had ever seen. "Wow this is your place?" "yeah," Joe said. "This is it." Devyn looked around at the number of barns and outbuildings and the large yard that surrounded the two-story house. The green shudders and roof seemed to blend in with the trees. Joe parked in front of the garage. "Welcome home," he said. Copyright 2020 by Keith Yates (keith.96@att.net) All rights reserved.