Date: Wed, 25 Oct 2006 03:56:27 -0700 (PDT) From: Puer Amore Subject: Forgive me Jody PT VIII Forgive me, Jody (PT VIII) By Barry pueresamo@yahoo.com Disclaimer: This work is one of fiction. Any resemblance of persons or places mentioned in this story to actual persons or places is only slightly more than coincidence. Copyright 2006 Barry. All Rights Reserved. There wasn't a lot of time, the next morning, to discuss the evening before and Mike and the rest, so I promised we'd discuss it when I got home that evening. I felt badly about making Jody feel like the lesser half of our relationship, but I feel so strongly about drugs and those who use them. Even if Jody were 27 instead of 17, I suppose my reaction would have been the same. My love for Jody had risen to a plateau that anyone I find doing anything that would harm him, physically or psychologically is, by virtue of the fact, going to be considered an enemy. I thought to myself: He's struggling, working hard, to overcome his dyslexia and catch up on his reading and writing skills. I'll be damned if I'm going to let anyone de-rail him from that effort, especially by distracting him into something as harmful as drugs. Jody and I had our chat that evening. He seemed to understand the slippery slope that is drugs, even the so-called gateway drugs. I was relieved he didn't push back on any of what I tried to impress upon him. We were back on track. Days clicked by, as they always do. Joe asked me to bring Jody and myself to have Thanksgiving dinner with him and Gary. We'd be celebrating on the day after Thanksgiving, since Joe wanted to spend Thanksgiving Day with Sam at the hospital. Joe had everything prepared at the local supermarket, so it was just a matter of picking it up; bringing it home, and serving it up. Jody and I brought the wine and the dessert and our cheery selves. After a few words of welcome, Jody agreed to go with Joe to pick up the food. That left Gary and I alone to visit. You and the Wussy getting along OK? Gary asked. If you mean your brother, Jody, yes, we're getting along just fine. I replied. You know I'm really jealous, don't you, Barry. Gary suggested. What ever for? I asked. You and Jody have something very special. You have a relationship of love and respect for each other. I've wanted that all my life. He said. Really? I asked. So your tough guy act is only and act, huh? Don't tell anyone. He said. I smiled. I am tough, I have to be. He asserted. Joe seems to really care for you, Gary. Is that not enough for you? I asked. Joe tries really hard to make me feel like I'm his son; he tries too hard, really. But, I know who his real son is.....the Wussy. Gary explained. Gary, it's really unhelpful to refer to Jody that way. He is, after all, your brother. Half-Brother! Gary corrected me. If the love that should be there was, in fact, there, that detail wouldn't matter. I suggested. I continued: You keep the kid perpetually intimidated, scared out of his wits. I don't understand why you seem to hate him so. I don't really hate him, Barry. I just don't like him....Never Have! Gary replied. I wouldn't let anyone else beat the crap out of him or anything.....that's my job. Why do you dislike him so? I asked. Just Do! Gary replied. Always have. I don't know why.....I just do. Is it because he's gay? I asked. Naw! Carneys don't care about any of that crap. Gary said. I didn't know you knew all our family secrets, Barry. I probably don't. I responded. But, I'm learning. Does it freak you out? Gary asked. Not at all. I replied. There's such an obvious "character" and such a strong bond in this family. I don't understand it all, but I'm trying. I'm very proud that your family regards me as a friend. We do, Barry. We all are fond of you and love you, especially Jody. Gary asserted. He continued: The family is not such a mystery, when you get to know each of us. We're each our own character, basically, we're a group of misfits...not ready for the so-called real world. At home only in a Carney environment, with all the other misfits. In short....We're Weird! Not many people can handle it. How am I doing? I asked. Real Good, Barry, Real Good! He replied. I'm happy to hear that, Gary. I said. It's got to be pretty weird for you. Gary continued; Jody would like to be your lover. I'd love it if you could just be my father. Gary, you're 19 years old. I'm only 21, myself. I said. Joe seems to love you a great deal, Gary. Can't you accept him as your father? I think he's hoping for your acceptance. I suggested. If he really loved me, he would kick my ass for picking on his son. He says nothing, so I keep doing it. He only tells Jody to get tough and kick my ass, himself. Gary, I stated, you're twice the size of either Joe or Jody. It's not likely that either of them is going to step up to that plate. Is that really what you want....for Joe to kick your ass...so you'll know he loves you? I don't know what I want, Barry. That's the whole damned problem. Gary stated. Well, I can certainly tell you this, Gary. If you want to grow closer to me, even win my affection as a father figure, you must stop all this physical and mental abuse of Jody. I find it an extremely unattractive character-trait and it would be a real barrier to my ever loving you more deeply. I instructed. Really, Barry, you don't like it that I'm tough? Gary asked. What's tough about terrorizing some poor kid half your size, Gary? I asked. I continued: Furthermore, NO! I'm not likely to bond with you what with your "tough-guy" bravado always at the forefront. I'd like to see what's in your heart.....what is your capacity for love and tenderness. I know it's hiding in there someplace. Please let me see it. We'd all love you openly...but you must make the first move, Gary. You have to open yourself up to the possibility. You won't be sorry. I concluded. Tears began to well up in his eyes and run down his cheeks. Please be my Dad, Barry. I need someone like you in my life. Gary said. Gary, if you want to impress me in a favorable way, such that I would grow that close to you, I want you to show me that you are serious. I want to see you begin to treat Jody as a loving brother. That's the proof I want, Gary. I want to see that side of you.....agreed? OK. He said. I moved to him and wiped the tears away with my thumbs, while holding his face in my hands. I kissed him on the forehead. Help me to love you, Gary. I said. He gave me a protracted hug. My God! I thought, he's twice as big as me too. Please love me, Barry. He said. I do love you, Gary....but we must work on it...make it grow....OK? I stated. He hugged me again, saying: We will, starting today. Just then, Joe and Jody turned into the gravel driveway, bringing our dinner. Joe brought the truck to a stop and ordered Gary and Jody to carry the food into the house. While they were doing as ordered, Joe turned to me and said: Did I just see Gary hugging you? Sure did. I responded. Barry, could you teach me your magic. Gary has never hugged anyone in his whole life....not that I've ever witnessed. You're amazing! Joe advised. It's not magic, Joe. It's genuine affection. It's just that simple. I said. I continued: Have you ever made the first move, Joe......ever hugged Gary....or Jody? I asked. Naw! It's not....... The Carney way? I interrupted. Right! He answered. Well, Joe, you reap what you sow, as they say. Show these boys you love them; don't just assume they know because you bring home the bacon. That will make them feel indebted to you...it won't make them love you. If you do, they'll respond. TRY IT, Joe ....Please! I concluded. On a different topic...I didn't know you had horses and chickens and a barn and all the rest, until Jody told me his chores included taking care of them. What else is all this acreage good for? Joe explained. We had hoped that we could supplement our income this way. It hasn't worked out that way, though. So we live 11 miles off the main drag and raise horses, sell eggs, and the rest. Truth is, it's a money losing proposition. Just then, Gary shouted to us from the house: It's ready! Let's eat! Coming! Joe shouted back. We had a delightful visit and a good meal. Gary, to my surprise, did nothing to taunt Jody throughout our visit. I was very pleased. I looked at my watch. Yikes! I exclaimed. Jody and I had better hit the road. Jody's got school in the morning. Thanks for a great time, Joe...you too, Gary. We really enjoyed it. Happy Thanksgiving! I exclaimed...And please, give my regards to Sam. Joe and Gary walked us to the door. To everyone's astonishment, Gary went to Jody, placing his arms around Jody in a hug. Happy Thanksgiving, Little Brother!..... I love you. Gary proclaimed. Jody was so taken aback, he stammered for a response. I.....I....I love you too, Gary. Jody responded. Joe was amazed. He turned to Gary and teased: Now Dammit! That's just Not fair. I've waited all these years for a hug like that from Gary and Jody. I want mine too! Gary couldn't believe his ears. He went to Joe and the two embraced, probably for the first time in their lives. It was an awkward hug, but it was a start. I thought. Jody went to them and they each released an arm to accept him into their embrace. My eyes were beginning to well up at the sight. They finally released their embrace, and Jody returned to my side. Gary, finally, came to me and hugged me sweetly, kissing me on the forehead. I love you, Barry. Gary said. You guys be careful on the road out there. OK? He concluded. I love you too, Gary. Take care of your Dad. I turned to Jody: Ready, Jody? I asked. He nodded. I envied Jody's ability to sleep in a moving vehicle. I never could. He looked so peaceful and utterly loveable as he napped on the way home. He's so precious. I thought. He awoke, as I brought the car to a stop at the apartment, and said: Good. We're home. I'm tired. Me too, sweetie. I replied. A hot shower and some sleep are all I want. He yawned. Me too. Once naked, and enjoying the hot shower together, I said: I was surprised, but pleased, that Gary gave you such a sweet goodbye. I wasn't expecting that. I know, Jody replied, as he placed his head under the showerhead. I have to think about it, he's up to something. You don't think it was an honest expression of affection, since he hasn't seen you in a while? I asked. You know what they say.....absence makes the heart grow fonder...or something like that. Gary!.....Hell NO!.......Jody exclaimed. He's up to something. Well, give him a chance, sweetheart, maybe he's finally opening up. I hope so. I stated. I watched the water running off the tip of his dick as if it were an ancient fountain, made in the likeness of Ganymede. I wanted to drink from it. I restrained myself. It was late, we were both tired. We slept the night through in our customary positions. The weather had turned cold and nasty, so we spent the remainder of our Thanksgiving weekend with the usual fare of football games, munchies, and spirited beverages. It was fine. We spent most of our time naked, cuddling up under a blanket and enjoying each other intimately, as the football games droned on in the background. I couldn't tell you which team won any of those games and couldn't care less. We had our own games to play. It was a holiday weekend, so we had no distractions. No visit to Sister Renee...none of it. Just my beautiful Jody and I loving each other...drinking each other in. Thanksgiving, indeed. I said. I could never be thankful enough; I have you in my life, Jody. I'm the one who's grateful and giving thanks, Barry. You could get along fine without me. I could NOT survive without you, Barry. Jody replied. No Way, sweetheart! I retorted. I seriously could NOT get along without you, not now, my love. The shock to my heart and wound to my soul would be un-survivable. He smiled at me, lovingly, and then he kissed me passionately. God! Does he ever know how to kiss! I thought. One last ritual filled-out our Thanksgiving weekend, putting up our Christmas Tree. It was such a delight to watch Jody decorate the tree. The lights, the garland, the ornaments, the tensile.......the whole glorious thing. Finally, the brightly lighted star at the top completed the mission. The scent of pine filled the apartment and evoked the Christmas Spirit in both of us. When it was finished, Jody and I stood before it, one arm around each other. We starred at it for a long time, mesmerized by the sparkling lights and its wonderful magic. Too soon, it was Monday morning, time for work and school. As I dropped Jody at school, I reminded him: Remember, sweetheart, I've got a journalism seminar this afternoon; I'll be late getting home. There's plenty to eat and drink, so you shouldn't starve before I get home. I smiled. I'll be fine; except I'll be missing you till I see you come through the front door. Jody replied. I'll get home as soon as I can, baby. I promise. I replied. You don't mind walking home in this weather? I asked. Naw, it's only a few blocks. I'll be fine. Don't worry. He said. OK, then. Have a good day, sweetheart. I love you! I declared. Enjoy the seminar, my love, I love you too....drive carefully. He replied. I saw him in the mirror waving bye to me with that big "Jody-Smile" as I drove away. I stuck my arm out the window and waved back till I saw him turn to walk into the school. It was later than I had planned, when I finally arrived home. I opened the front door and was surprised NOT to find my beautiful Jody, glorious in his nakedness. Surely he hasn't gone to bed without me. I thought. I checked the bedroom......No Jody. Where the Hell is he? I pondered. Then I noticed the message light on the answering machine. It was flashing. Oh, good, I thought. He's left me a message. I pressed "play" This is Officer Renner with the Dallas P.D., I'm calling in reference to Jody........ My heart sunk to my toes, immediately. The message informed me that Jody was under arrest and being held at the North Dallas police substation. They wanted me to help locate Jody's father, since, as a minor, Jody could only be released to a parent. I called Joe. Gary answered and told me that they had already reached Joe and he was on his way to the police station. Gary told me that Joe had advised that if I could get there ahead of him, since it was much further for Joe that the police said I could keep Jody company till Joe arrived. Jody was very upset and inconsolable, the police had advised. I drove like the proverbial Bat-out-of- Hell to get to the police station. Joe had already arrived. He had just approached the desk-officer, when I walked up. We were both horrified at what the officer told us. Apparently, Jody was in the company of Mike, when they were caught, red-handed, by the police breaking into a car. They were both stoned, and Mike's car was loaded with POT, Cocaine, Hash, and Speed.....and in amounts that suggest possession with the intent to distribute. Worse, still, the police officer, making the arrest, claims that they threatened his life, once back on the streets. All these offenses are felonies, the officer told Joe saying: Your boy is in serious trouble, Sir. He'll be remanded to your custody, for tonight, but he may not leave Dallas County. He's technically a minor, though barely, that's his only hope, Sir. His friend, Mike has obtained to the age of majority; he'll be held in custody till his arraignment and will be charged as an adult. Joe and I were stunned...speechless...and in shock. I know a great lawyer, Joe. I'll call him as soon as I get home. I didn't know what the Hell I was saying .....I didn't know what to say. Joe nodded. Jody soon appeared with another officer at his side, who removed the handcuffs from Jody and turned him over to Joe. I went to put my arms around Jody and console him. He pushed me away. I was completely crushed. Let's go home, son. Joe said. Can't I go with Barry? Jody asked. No, Joe said, you can't. You can't leave Dallas County, where we live. Barry's apartment is in Collin County. Joe continued: What makes you think Barry would want you now, anyway? Jody burst into tears. Joe, Please! I exclaimed. Of course I want him back. I declared. I continued: We both know Jody better than this, this isn't Jody. This is that damned Mike's doing. Why Jody was with him, I don't know, and I guess it's irrelevant now...but I know Jody would NEVER do anything like this on his own. Jody was still crying uncontrollably as we got to Joe's truck. Jody wouldn't look at me, wouldn't let me touch him or embrace him. Goodbye, Barry. Jody said in a stark tone of finality as he closed the truck door. He put his face down into his hands and began crying again. My heart begged to stop beating. I thought it surely would. Joe drove away, leaving me to stand alone in the cold and silence of the police station parking lot. I retuned to my car. My hands were shaking so badly, I couldn't drive. I sat there for a long time, regaining my composure. Finally I put the key in the ignition and started the engine.