Date: Fri, 1 Jun 2018 11:04:37 +0000
From: Devon Campbell <peterbilt1228@live.com>
Subject: Jimmy, Part I

This is a fictionalized account of a true life experience that happened
over the holidays (2009), involving an adult male and a fifteen year old
boy.

**03 - About Jimmy   (The Emails)

				About Jimmy
				The Emails

This is about Jimmy.  He is fifteen.  Unlike some boys, he was honest about
his age when he emailed me about reading my stories.  His was like so many
other emails that I get from young boys. He told me how my stories had
impacted him; how they helped him understand himself better. Then like so
many others he asked if he could ask me some questions. I didn't bother
reminding him that he wasn't supposed to be on the site where he found my
stories. I've stopped doing that, because nearly all of these boys' first
emails are a disguised plea for help and regardless of their age I won't
leave them hanging.  I know I probably should but then I stop and think,
this boy has written to me as the only person on the planet he can talk to
and I can't shut him out.

I hear from a lot of teenagers who have found my stories.  Most are 15 thru
18; a couple of them are 13 and 14; even younger, down to age ten.  The
very young ones, under age 13, are quite open even to the point of being
reckless about their feelings; they do not yet know of the cruel
condemnation and social stigma that often awaits them. Most of those 13 and
above are inevitably in a turmoil, scared, dealing with their sexuality,
they tell me they have learned from my stories, and want to know if they
can ask me questions.  I always say yes and I answer all questions.  This
boy was no exception.



He said he almost lied about his age but thought I could probably figure
him out so he told me he was fifteen, and hoped I wouldn't be turned off by
his age and that I would still email him.  (TURNED OFF????  HA).

I emailed him back, thanked him for his kind remarks about my writing, and
told him I would answer any questions he might have.  He was both surprised
and elated that I even answered his email, much less would actually answer
questions, and he started right in with the questions.

As always, I always first determined that he was using a computer that was
private and that all of his stuff was password protected.  Yes, he said he
had his own computer in his room and he had another email address that his
parents had access to. That's pretty standard procedure for teenagers.

We exchanged several emails.  He asked the usual questions, my age, where I
live, I write like I must have a lot of experience, did I have any kids,
and a bunch of other stuff about me. He was happy to learn that I have
raised a son, and that I am well old enough to be his Dad.

His questions weren't so unusual.  In fact, much of what he wrote in our
exchange of emails weren't questions at all; he wanted to talk about his
feelings. The thing that breaks my heart is how relieved and grateful these
boys are to finally discover someone they can talk to about their innermost
feelings. I am always deeply moved that I am that person, and a little
frightened, because I do not take it lightly. And I wonder where their
fathers are.  But fear of their fathers is too often justified.

(One boy of fourteen wrote me about the shattered trust of his father.  As
a gifted athlete his father was very proud of him and they had a great dad
and son relationship.  Until the boy, trusting that relationship, came out
to his dad.  The man was so enraged that he threw the boy out of the house.
Another young man in very rural Ireland; when he was fifteen he came out to
his family.  His very ignorant and sadistic father took him to a shed and
tied him to a post and beat him unmercifully, left him there for three days
and would not allow the boy's mother or sister take care of him or take
food and water.  Then he banished the boy from his home and forbid his
mother and sister from even visiting him.  These are "religious" church
going people. The father then informed the "bishop" about his son and the
bishop condemned the boy IN CHURCH! Strong-willed, the boy continued going
to church but lived in a tiny abandoned cottage and supported himself by
raising a garden and selling vegetables at the local market and a friend
gave him a part time job as a bartender.....happened to be the bar his
father frequented.  Shortly after he turned 21, he killed himself).

Like others, Jimmy was scared that somebody would find out about him; his
parents or friends. What a shame that we impose this on young boys, that
they are frightened to be who they are, who they are born to be. He was
equally curious about sex with guys.  He said he dated girls but it was for
fun and for a cover.  He said he was pretty popular (no surprise there),
and he didn't have any trouble getting dates, but he didn't date the girls
that the jocks dated.  He is athletic but he isn't a jock.

He said he jacks off a lot, but he thought probably no more than other
boys....did I think every day and sometimes twice a day was too much? I
smiled at that. I assured him that he sounded pretty normal to me.

He said he was glad to have someone say he was normal because he was gay
(What a hell of a thing for a fifteen year old boy to say)....he said he
had accepted that.  I told him I didn't believe being gay was something you
"accepted" no more than you could reject being gay.  Being gay is more a
"realization" or maybe coming to grips with something that you know is not
widely accepted by society.  I did my best to dispel the "normal"
concept....Who gives anyone the right to decide what is normal?  Straight
is not necessarily normal; it is just more common.  He liked that.

He quickly got to the nitty-gritty, about sex. How big should his cock be?
(I was getting the impression that he was not a porn addict, perhaps didn't
have the chance to watch a lot of porn, or maybe just hadn't found it). I
told him there is no "size requirement," his cock should be the size it is.
Oddly, he didn't tell me his size.  I told him if he was concerned about
being too small, don't be because he still has some growing to do, and that
often boys go through a growth spurt around his age.  If he was concerned
about being or getting too big, there is no such thing as a cock that is
too big. I didn't ask his size. He would tell me in time, if he wanted me
to know.

His "experience" was by his own hand.  He wanted to know about blowjobs;
did you actually blow on a guy's cock, or actually suck it.  He didn't see
them actually doing that in the porn he saw. (I wondered if porn had been
blocked from his computer).  He also questioned just how you could suck a
cock and he wondered if some of the pictures he saw were fake, or trick
photography or touched up, like a guy with is face buried in a guy's pubes,
taking all of his cock even down his throat. He had stuck his fingers in
his mouth to reach his throat, to "measure", and he didn't know how anybody
could handle even a smaller or normal size cock but he knew from porn that
it could be done, taking a cock in your throat--if it was for real-- but he
didn't know how it could be done. I covered that, told him those pics were
real and yes, it could be done and was very common as well as very
enjoyable for both parties.

He had tasted his own cum, off his fingers.  He sorta liked it. He liked
precum better--so do I--and he produces a lot--so do I.  Did all cum taste
the same?  I told him no. In fact, what you eat and drink can affect the
taste of cum. Smokers and drinkers, men who eat a lot of beef and dairy,
their cum tastes awful.  Fruit, like peaches and pineapple, cinnamon tea
produces better tasting cum. Older guys' cum often has a bitter taste, I
think because they probably don't get much sex to produce new stuff.
Younger guys, teenagers' cum always tastes wonderful because it's not left
in the tanks very long; they have a lot of sex of one kind or another so
their cum is always fresh. He had a lot of questions:

Am I gay, or Bi (Bi), top or bottom (either)?

What is the biggest cock I ever sucked? (over 11 inches).

Can I deep throat? (yes).

Do I take cum in my mouth?  (yes, most of the time).

Do I swallow?  (Yes, most of the time).

Does it make a guy mad if you are sucking him and you don't let him cum in
your mouth?  (Yes sometimes but not often; but it's generally considered
rude to take a guy to the brink then finish him off by hand).

Or if you don't swallow his cum?  (Also considered rude).

Do most guys make you take their loads, or deep throat their cocks? (I've
had it happen where they've held my head in a tight grip and force fucked
my throat and made me take their load and keep holding me till I swallow).

How do you breathe when you take a cock all the way in your throat?
(through your nose.  It takes practice, and you gotta want it).

Is it dangerous to suck cock, take cum in your mouth or swallow cum?  (I
believe the science is still out on that but from all I've read it's not
considered nearly as dangerous as it once was. Seems that the bad germs
that cause most STDs are pretty fragile and don't stand up so well against
the brutal stomach acids).

He moved right along; it didn't take him long to get around to fucking.  He
said he really wanted to try getting fucked.  How do you avoid a "mess?"
What do you do to prevent that? In porn they even suck a cock right out of
a guy's ass.  I explained the importance of being super clean, and how to
accomplish that, where to find the product, or even use warm water to
repeatedly flush out. He had no idea about any of that.  I joked that he
should be SO clean that he a guy could eat his dessert out of his ass. I
also told him that he should be so clean that he could suck the guy's cock
right out of his ass. He wasn't at all sure about that.  How does it feel?
Does it hurt? My answers were pretty generic because it depends on the
guy(s).

I asked him if he had heard of rimming.  No.  I explained rimming and then
he said he'd seen it in porn and read about it but didn't know it was
called that.  He thought it was a little gross.  But the way I described
it, and the importance of being clean, he was sure he would probably want
to try it sometime with the right guy.  I told him EVERYTHING he does
should be with the right guy.  I asked him if he had anyone in mind.  No,
there was nobody actually fixed in his mind but he had fantasies about a
couple of boys in school, jocks.

Throughout much of this exchange he was saying he wished I could show him
stuff.  I told him I wished I could too, but not to worry, he would find
the right guy to do that. Then there was an exchange where he asked where I
lived. (I am never hesitant about telling guys that I live in the USA, in
Indiana, but never the town).  He was so excited when I told him I live in
Illinois.  He wanted to know WHERE, because he lived in Indiana too!
Indiana is a big state.

He told me the town he lived in, I did not. I have made it a policy not to
meet up with guys I meet on line, even though I've "met" a couple who live
very close, and one who lives only a short distance from my son. I just
don't think it's a good idea. As a few more emails were exchanged and he
was practically begging for us to meet, I felt myself weakening. Then he
sent me a picture. Little shit, I think he knew exactly what he was
doing. I weakened a LOT when I saw his picture. He was sitting in a car
wearing a tux.

Over the course of several emails, he continued to beg for us to meet up so
I could show him the things we were talking about. He asked a lot of
questions about my son and me and he just knew I was the world's greatest
dad and he could learn so much from me and would I PLEASE reconsider and
meet up with him in person. I said no again--I thought we were doing okay
with his questions and my answers--but as he brought it up several more
times, I was weakening.

He didn't give up on the idea of us meeting. When it came up again--several
more times in fact--I finally agreed. Frankly, I was afraid of what he
might do on his own. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach when I sent
that email; what was I getting myself into......


                                        Our First Meeting

I laid down some ground rules for our meeting.  I knew his town well. I
still had not told him my town. I picked a very public park in his town
with busy streets running along each side of it. I told him what time I
would be there and where I would be sitting, on a bench near the
fountain. I would arrive FIRST, (for him not to arrive early) and told him
what I would be wearing.

All went well. I saw him from a distance arriving at the park and looking
around then coming toward the bench. He was tall, lean and DAMN, he was so
cute! I thought he looked older than fifteen, but I have a hard time
judging ages of kids. He got a drink from the fountain and wiping his mouth
with the back of his hand; he approached the bench and asked if he could
sit down.  By way of identifying myself I told him yes and called him by
name.

We struck up a conversation. We talked about general stuff at first, mostly
about school, but he was anxious to ask questions. He had a lot of
questions. He asked a lot of the same questions he'd asked in his emails
and we elaborated on those. He opened up. He said he was gay, and it was
getting harder and harder to be around other boys in the locker room and
showers. I thought to myself, how hard it must be for those guys to HAVE
him in the showers. He said he knew "something" was going to happen, he
just didn't know what exactly, or with who, and he was scared about that,
but also curious enough and anxious enough that he knew it would happen
anyway. I thought he might be referring to being found out and being forced
into sex by older boys in the locker room.

I asked him to be more precise, more honest with himself, and tell me what
he expected would happen, or hoped for. He said he wanted to "do it" with a
guy; he watched porn and he was dying for it, to find out what it was like.

I said, "That's too generic.  I want to hear you say it, not for me, but
for yourself."

He said he wanted to get with a really hot guy and do all the things we'd
talked about in our emails; suck his cock, fuck a guy and maybe let the guy
fuck him.

I smiled and said, "Okay, well, it's out there in the open, that's a good
start."

He smiled back, like he was relieved that he had said it.

I asked him if he had anybody in mind.  He said no...well, yeah, he had
several guys in mind, but not really because they were all straight and he
would be too scared to approach them even if he knew how, which he didn't.

I gave him some pointers, including eye contact, then told him to be
cautious unless he was ready to come out. He said hell no to that.

It was a good conversation and I was feeling glad that I'd come, till he
hit me with......"How about you?"  I thought at first that he was asking
about MY experiences.  I asked what he meant, what he would like to know.
He said how about me being the one to show him. I wasn't expecting that, or
pretended I wasn't, and honestly, I had not come to meet him with that in
mind. I thought we had clarified that in our emails.

He said I was the most logical one, since I was the first and only person
in the world who knew about him and the only person on the planet he'd ever
talked to about it.

I told him that knowing about him and doing something are two entirely
different things.

"It needs to be somebody closer to your own age," I said.

"I don't know anybody my own age to do it with, and even if I did they
probably wouldn't know what they were doing any more then I would."

I told him that those things tend to work out, but he wasn't convinced of
that. He asked me several more times to be the one, to be his "teacher."
Each time I told him no.

Finally I told him I needed to get back. He seemed sad but I told him if he
had any more questions to email me and we parted ways.  I felt okay.  A
little empty inside, like I'd just passed up a golden opportunity, but I
felt good that I had helped the boy.

There was an email from him when I got home.  He went on and on about how
happy he was that he'd met me in person, how much I had helped him and how
relieved he was that somebody finally knew about him and understood, and he
at last had somebody with a face that he could talk to. He asked me again
to be the first to have sex with him, and stated his case.  In my reply I
declined.

Then he took another approach. It didn't particularly surprise me, but I
had to wonder at how these young kids' minds work.  He didn't understand
why I wouldn't do it. I was the only person who knew about him, I had
explained everything to him, and I was the logical one.  He went on to say
that it was going to happen; he knew guys checked him out in the restrooms.
Why not me?  What was it about him that I didn't like?  That sort of got to
me that he felt like I was rejecting him.

I replied with assurances that I liked him just fine, I enjoyed meeting and
talking with him and yeah, I might be up to meeting and talking again
sometime. (By that time I thought he had gotten over the idea of us having
sex). I told him to check out the mall...he knew which one...there were
always teenagers hanging out there. Hang out at the food court. Go into
Abercrombie and Hollister and the other stores that catered to young
people...be seen, he could sure as hell attract attention, just keep his
eyes open.  (And NO, stay out of the restroom!) I told him especially
Hollister's; it's dark in their stores and I've never been in one that
didn't have at least one guy, or more, who I was sure was gay.  I told him
to go in at different times of day or night to check out the different guys
working there. Get one of the guys to wait on him, try some stuff on.
Pants or jeans or shorts, go into the dressing room, put them on then come
back out and ask the guy about the fit.  He would be able to guess if the
guy was interested. Like if the guy slipped his fingers inside the waist of
the jeans to check the fit, as I've seen them do....he was probably
interested.  Or, in Hollister's or A&F, I have seen young dudes take off
the shirt they're wearing, right out in the store, and try on a shirt.  Do
that, show off your body.  He liked the advice.

These emails went back and forth, several a day for a while.  He started
telling me exactly what he wanted to do...to me...and what he wanted me to
do to him...and would I like this or that, or not, or was there something
else I would rather do. He was desperately curious and he was coming on
strong. I turned it around and told him to think about all of these things
with another boy in mind, or someone a little older, like college age, like
somebody from Hollister's or A&F.  He said he hadn't worked up the nerve
yet and besides he would rather know what he was doing before he hooked up
with another boy. It was still no....but...I found myself lying in bed
laying out possible scenarios in my head!!

Then he played dirty. He sent me a picture of himself naked, with a hardon!

My Godd!  He is absolute mouth-watering perfection!  He took my breath
away. But I gave him hell for sending me the picture and told him I deleted
it and not to send me any more like it. He asked me why, and he seemed
hurt.

I wrote him back, "Because you are fifteen years old and I don't want
pictures of naked young boys on my computer."  And I went on to tell him he
should not be sending ANY pictures to strangers, naked or clothed.

He said he understood and he was sorry, but he thought I might want to see
what he looked like.  I assured him I LIKED the picture and I had saved the
one of him in the tux on one of my thumb drives.

The picture haunted me. Truth is, I didn't delete the picture
immediately. I lingered over it, drooling over his youthful perfection.
And it pained me when I did finally push the delete button.  Damn little
shit knew exactly what he was doing.  Then one night I checked I checked my
email before going to bed, which was my custom, and there was one from
Jimmy; one word....."PLEASE!!"

Early the next morning I emailed him and said "okay."


                                     Jimmy's Initiation
                                          The Jacuzzi

He was so excited that I had agreed to meet him again!  He was elated!  As
the emails flew fast and furious I was getting a little excited myself,
although I didn't know in my own head exactly what I was agreeing to.

I asked him if he knew of a good place.  He told me times his parents
wouldn't be home.  HELL NO!  I was not going near his house; I didn't even
want to know where he lived.  He said he had a friend, we could use his
house; his friend had told him that he could bring girls there anytime and
he would leave.  NO!!  I told him I would get a motel room.  He was very
happy with that. I asked him to tell me exactly what he wanted to happen.
He said sex, all kinds, everything, and he went down the list.  He was so
excited.

I asked him if he could name a certain motel there that was within
reasonable walking distance for him because I was not going to "swing by
and pick him up."  He did and it was a motel I had used before. He said he
could ride his bike there. I told him no, we didn't want a bicycle parked
outside a motel room. He said he could walk there. I made the reservation.
I got the suite with the Jacuzzi tub.

In my next email I told him to delete all of our emails; and made him
promise he would. He emailed me back and said he had wiped them all out. In
my next email I gave him the room number; just a number, there was nothing
else in the email and I reminded him to delete.  Then I next sent the time
he was to be there, again told him to delete.  Next email I told him that I
would leave the door unlocked, that he was to walk right up to the door and
come in, without knocking, like he was staying in the room.  Reminded him
to delete.

On the appointed day....I drove to the motel, checked in and set about
getting things ready. There was a connection to Jimmy that had developed
and I wanted this to be just right for him; that was the reason I got the
Jacuzzi.  I got some ice and iced down the six pack of beer and the Pepsi
I'd brought.  There was never any mention of beer but I figured he would
drink it if I offered it.  Just one; I didn't want to get him drunk, no
more than a slight buzz. Then I set about the other preparations.

I put a hand towel on the night stand and laid out the lube, condoms, and
some flavored licking/sucking lotion, cockstraps and cockrings, a pair of
tit cups and a couple of dildos, and covered them with another towel.  I
set out some candles on the other night stand, on the table and the
dresser, and set four around the Jacuzzi. I'd done this, in this very room,
with a couple of other guys, and it had its desired effect. Then I turned
down the bed.  I set out some lube and a Fleet in the bathroom for Jimmy,
along with a "spring flowers" douche for him to use as a follow up.

I also set out a set of toiletries that I had bought for him as a gift; a
brand called BOD that is popular with young guys around here.  I use it
too.  The stuff has names like Really Ripped Abs, and Rock Hard, and shows
drawings of really hot jocks.  All the while I felt the nagging that this
was a foolish thing I was doing, imagining that it could be a trap. But
this wasn't a hookup on Craig's list.  I felt I knew Jimmy well enough that
he was on the level.

I flushed out then showered and put on a pair of white, stretch boxers with
built in pouch. I also slipped on a black rubber cockring and that made the
bulge even bigger. I also slipped on a Hollister T-shirt and white crew
socks; I don't like running around a motel room barefoot.  Then I waited. I
half watched TV but got up from the bed several times to check out the
window.  I was getting anxious. I had this picture in my head of this
beautiful kid, naked--one that he had sent me--and I could hardly wait to
see him in the flesh.  I lit all the candles.

I was a little surprised when the door opened even though I had told Jimmy
to come right in without knocking.  He came in, closed the door and leaned
back against it.  He was smiling as he looked around at the candle lit room
but I could tell he was understandably nervous.

I got up and went over to him.....said "Jimmy" and I gave him a hug.  I
could almost feel the relief. I told him to make himself comfortable, and I
bolted the door.

I asked him if he wanted a beer, if he ever drank beer, or if he would
rather have Pepsi. He said yes he would like beer, and yes he drank beer
when he got the chance, which wasn't very often. I got us each a beer and
motioned for him to the bed as I sat leaning back against the headboard.

I left the TV on but turned down the sound so we could talk. I wanted to
put him at ease.  He told me how very glad he was that I had consented to
meet him like this. I told him he smelled good; he said I did too, he said
he just got out of the shower.

I said, "I've got some stuff set out in the bathroom for you."  He frowned
but I got up and took him by the hand to pull him up from the bed.  I took
him into the bathroom.

"Wow!  You've got a hot tub!"

"No, it's a Jacuzzi.  We can get in it when you're finished showering
again."  I touched the Fleet and the douche and smiled and told him I would
leave him alone.

"This is really nice," he said, nodding to the candle lit Jacuzzi.

Ten minutes or so passed and he came out of the bathroom with a towel
around his waist. Godd, he was gorgeous!

"I'm finished; that feels wonderful."

"Good." I went in the bathroom with him and into the inner bathroom and
turned on the water to the Jacuzzi.  I saw that he had opened the BOD. He
said he loved it.  I told him I had bought it for him to take with him. He
was very pleased with that. "Have you ever had a bubble bath?"

"Not since I was a baby, I guess."

I squirted some bubble bath into the water and the tub quickly mushroomed
with bubbles.

"Oh, this is going to be fun," he said. He was waiting on me.

I peeled off my T-shirt.  When I brought my arms down I saw how he was
looking at me, almost a worshipful look. His eyes fell to my shorts.

"I love those shorts."

"You can have them when you leave."

"Can I take them off of you?"

"Sure." I was a little surprised at his boldness but I shouldn't have been,
he was so eager.

"I've been dying to see this," he said as he moved in and peeled the shorts
down; way down before my cock swung free.  He straightened, sort of reared
back with his eyes wide.  "Holy Shit!"  I laughed and took them off the
rest of the way. I reached for the knot that was holding his towel on. I
undid it and took the towel, leaving him wonderfully naked.

"Holy Shit back at you."  I took his long, meaty cock in my hand.  "Damn,
are you sure you're just fifteen?" He smiled proudly. "And you asked if
your cock was the right size!" I pulled on his cock a couple of times then
stepped into the tub.  I laid back. He was boning up fast. I didn't turn on
the jets.

"Where do you want me?" he asked.

"Right here, beside me."  I put my arm out to help him in the tub.
"Careful you don't burn your balls on the candles," I said. He was hard
now.  I wasn't. He was obviously nervous.  I was in no hurry.

"I never dreamed it would be like this. This is all so nice," he said as he
sank into the water and lay back on my arm sort of on his side and put his
hand on my chest. He drew up his left leg and laid it across my thighs. He
asked, "Is this okay?"

I told him yes.  "Have you ever had sex at all, Jimmy, besides your hand?"

"No. I lie to everyone else but I'm telling you the truth."

"What made you decide you want to try sex with guys?"

"I don't know....I'm just attracted to guys."

"And you're not attracted to girls at all?"

"I think certain girls at school are pretty, even beautiful, but I'm not
attracted to them for sex. When I have feelings about sex it's about guys."

"All right."

"Can I ask you something?" he said.

I smiled.  "I thought I made it clear, you can ask me anything."

"Why am I all boned up and you're not?  You're not attracted to me?"

"Oh, I'm VERY attracted to you. But we're not going to rush this.  I want
to know you, and I want you to get to know me. Tell me, weren't you a
little afraid to come to a motel to meet a total stranger?  It could be
dangerous."

"You weren't a stranger to me.  We already met and talked."

"In a park, in public.  That's different from going to a motel.  In that
respect, I am still a stranger."

"Well, I have to trust somebody.  And from reading your stories....you
write stories about good things happening to people, and where bad things
do happen, you write that it gets taken care of.  I think that's the way
you are; otherwise you couldn't write it so well. And we did send a lot of
emails back and forth."

I smiled. It was all I could do; I was taken aback by his perspective of
me. "All right," I said.  "But you have to be careful. Don't make yourself
vulnerable.  Do you know who Matthew Shepard is...was?"

"I think he's the boy who got killed for being gay. They tied him to a
fence or something, didn't they?"

"Yes, he was brutally murdered, just because he was gay. They beat him to
death.  He was too trusting."  I let that soak in then I hugged his neck.
"Don't ever put yourself in a situation like that, especially with two
guys."

He said he wouldn't. He said that was partly the reason he was still a
virgin, because he was too scared to try anything with anyone. I told him
that was good.

"I fantasize about some of the jocks in the locker room at school.  But
they are way bigger than me, and I don't know if they would beat me up."

"Okay, you make sure you always keep that little bit of fear in the pit of
your stomach, it will serve you well," I told him.

"It was there when I came here," he said.

"Good."

"You're a big guy, but have you ever been in a situation where you thought
you might be in trouble?" he asked.

"Only once.  It was in a park, under an old bridge. I thought we had
connected, me and this guy. He came up to me like he was interested then
all of a sudden he called me a faggot and drew back his fist."

"Did he hit you??"

"No. I ducked and he hit the cement behind me. I knee'd him in the balls
and he went down. He was pretty pitiful, actually."

"What'd you do then?"

"I left him laying there clutching his balls. I think he might've broken
his hand. It was all bloody. I've wondered how he explained the blood on
the front of his jeans where he was holding his balls."

"You were lucky," he said.

"No, HE was lucky.  I didn't spend four years in the Army for nothing.  I
could've beaten him to a pulp.  I could've killed him. The Army teaches you
how to do that you know."

"But you wouldn't do that.  See, that's what I mean about how you
write. You would never hurt anybody except in self-defense, or to defend
someone else."

"The point is, Jimmy, I am a pretty big guy.  I've been in the Army where
they teach you how to kill people. You're not a big guy, and unless you
learn to fight you need to steer clear of situations like that."

He was lying on my left shoulder with his head on my chest and in the crook
of my neck. He was small of stature compared to me so I was able to hold
him in one arm and reach his butt with my left hand. His butt was perfect
as could be, so smooth and firm.  I held it with my hand spread across both
sides with my middle finger in the crack. He tightened his butt muscles
instinctively when I first put my hand around them but he quickly
relaxed. It was a nice, natural hold.

My cock wasn't going unnoticed. I saw how Jimmy kept looking at it lolling
in the water as the bubbles were slowly dissipating.  He drew his knee up a
little higher and nudged it gently against my balls. Then he reached for it
and lifted it up out of the water.

"Look, the Loch Ness monster."

I squeezed his hard ass for that. He kept hold of my cock and started
playing with it but I took his hand and laid it back on my chest.

"I have another question.  Have you ever used drugs?"

"No."  He said it with a frown.

"Have you ever thought about it?  Ever been approached?"

"Yes, and yes."

"Why didn't you?"

"I just didn't want to.  I didn't like the guy in the first place. He's a
creep."

"But you might, another time, if the circumstances are different, like if
the guy isn't a creep."

"I don't think so."  He laughed.  "Not the way you're talking.  I would be
afraid you would track me down and kick the shit out of me."

"If I ever found out, that's exactly what I would do.  But I won't ever
know, will I?  So I want you to promise me you won't ever use drugs.....not
even try it."

He hesitated for a few seconds, which bothered me.  "Why did you hesitate?"

"I was just thinking back, trying to remember how tempted I was when I was
offered drugs....if I could keep that promise."

"That was then, this is now.  You think forward. You make decisions all the
time that affect your future, so what's so difficult about this one?  Look,
I'm sorry if I'm sounding like your dad but I just don't associate with
druggies, or would-be druggies.

"You're not sounding like my dad. He would never talk to me like this about
things.  Never so stern.  He discusses things."

"This is not up for discussion," I said sternly.  "So I get a promise or I
pull the plug and we leave."

"Yes. I promise. Damn! Man, you are just like your stories."

"Okay, now remember this....that promise you just made isn't just to me.
It's to you."

He nodded, with a look on his face that made me think he was upset.  Maybe
I'd pushed him too far.

I hugged him.  "Look, Jimmy, maybe I am coming on a little too strong, but
dammit, you are so fuckin' cute, such a beautiful smile, those beautiful
brown eyes, such a great body. Drugs will make those eyes spacey, they will
make your teeth rot and fall out, they will destroy that beautiful body,
not to mention your mind, and nobody but another druggie is ever going to
want to do this with you, and instead of in a Jacuzzi in a nice motel room,
it'll be on a filthy mattress in an alley somewhere."

"Okay, I get the picture."

I put one hand gently around his head then, and kissed him.  I could tell
he was surprised but he responded immediately with his perfect lips molded
to mine. He was pretty tight lipped at first and I ran the tip of my tongue
back and forth across his lips several times before he parted them. He
responded well; his tongue met mine just inside HIS mouth. He let out a
little whimpering moan and we were quickly engaged in tongue lashing. It
was hot and wild but then I slowed us down.

We kissed again. It was a beautiful, gentle kiss. Just looking at his face
made it more so.

"You are so cute," I said.

He blushed.  "You are very good looking.  I hope I grow out of this and get
to be good looking like you."

"Don't be in any big hurry to lose this," I said, squeezing his face. "Give
me your tongue, stick it out."  He did and I sucked it into my mouth. His
cock was throbbing hard. All the while he was whimpering and in his
excitement he reached down for my cock.  I stopped him.

"Keep your hands above my waist."

"Why?"

"We're not ready to go there yet.  There's plenty to explore up here
first."

"You'll have to show me what, besides kissing," he said.

I showed him. I kissed along the side of his neck. I kissed back and forth
across his chest, licking and nibbling and sucking on his tits. He squealed
when I did that.

"You didn't know you had feelings there, did you?"

"No, I didn't."

"Now you do," I said as I rubbed my fingertips across his tits.  "Look how
they get bigger and stand up hard."

"Ohhh, yeah, that feels good."

I remembered the tit cups.  I got out of the rub and went to get them from
under the towel then climbed back in the tub. He wanted to know what they
were.

"Actually, their suction cups from a snake bite kit," I said. I licked on
and put it over his left tit.  Then the other over his right tit.

"Wow, that feels tight."

"We'll leave them on for a few minutes then I'll show you it feels," I
said.

I explored every inch of his firm chest, and nuzzled in his armpits. He
moaned again with surprise.

"And you didn't know you had feelings here," I murmured as I licked and wet
the nice bush of hair under his arm then moved to the other one.  Then I
kissed him again.

"Flex your arm for me." He did and I licked and kissed his hard bicep.

"Godd, your mouth feels good everywhere."

"See, sex is about a lot more than your cock," I said. I pulled on the tit
cups to see that they were still stuck in place.

"I want to know, am I supposed to learn and do everything you're doing?" he
asked.

"Yes, learn it, then you do whatever you feel like doing. This is about
you, Jimmy.  I already know about all of this stuff.  You reciprocate only
as you feel like it."

"I want to do everything you do to me," he said.

"All right, if you want to practice, because there will be a test later," I
joked.

"Then I'd better get busy on my homework."

Jimmy learned well.  I think any boy who has decided, or has come to
realize that he's gay; much of it comes by instinct.  Jimmy liked to kiss.
In between kissing my chest and biceps, and licking my armpits, he asked,
"Am I doing okay?"

"You're doing great.  Everything feels wonderful."

He was moving his hand up and down my thighs under the water and I knew he
was inching toward my balls.  When he cupped them in his hand I didn't stop
him.  But he never touched my cock. I decided to turn on the jets.

"Whoa!" His eyes got wide and he laughed.  "Wow! That feels great!"

He acted surprised and I didn't think he'd ever been in Jacuzzi before. The
water jettisoned up between my legs, causing my balls to bounce around like
a couple of little beach balls. It gushed up against Jimmy's butt and his
balls and also against his back, and the bubbles started rising again.

"Man, I like this," Jimmy said as he played with my balls some more.

I still held his butt in my hand and I was squeezing it and drawing my
middle finger gently back and forth in the split.  Gradually, with the
soapy water, I worked my finger in deeper till I found his hole.  I
caressed it gently.

"Mnmmnn, that feels good."

"Just a preview of the chapter to come," I said. "Anything that doesn't
feel good, you tell me," I said.

After a while he was squeezing his butt muscles against my finger and he
began to moan.  I started kissing him while I rubbed his asshole harder and
he squirmed against my hand.

"You can stick it in if you want to," he said.

"I know. I will."

"I want to see what it feels like. I've done it myself but my fingers
aren't as long and thick and muscular as yours.  They're going to feel like
a cock."

"You don't know what a cock feels like."  He winced when I pushed the tip
of my finger though his hole. I curved only the first knuckle in then
worked it around inside him to stretch his hole.

"Ohhhhh, fuck."

I didn't go any deeper, I just kept working it around to get him relaxed
and used to it.  And I let him keep playing with my balls and found it
amusing that he still didn't touch my cock.

He grinned and asked, "Am I ready to move further south?"

"No, not yet.  Let's check these out," I said. I pulled on one of the tit
cups.  The suction was tight and I had to pull hard to get it off.  His
nipple had swollen to double in size.

"Dang, what'd you do to it?" Jimmy asked.

"I'll show you."  I pulled him over toward me and sucked the turgid nipple
in my mouth.  He let out a big, "Awww, Fuck!" and put his hand on the back
of my head. I took his hand and put it on his cock.  "Feel your cock when I
do this," I said. I sucked and tongued and nibbled on his tit and he moaned
louder as he jacked his cock.

"Ohh, Geezusss!  OHh, fuck!" he cried out softly. "This must be what a girl
feels like when she gets her tits sucked."

"Have you ever sucked a girl's tits?" I murmured as I kept licking and
sucking his nipple.

"No, but I've heard guys in the locker room talk about it, how they can get
a girl's nipples to stand up."  He was tugging on the other cup.  It came
off and he felt his hard tit.  I leaned over to suck it and he cried out
again.

"Did you feel your cock?"

"Yes, it was quivering."

"See, you learned something else about your body. Your cock is hot wired to
your tits.  Let's do the other one."

His other tit was even more swollen and he practically screamed when I
sucked on it.  I sucked them both till they returned to normal size and
sensitivity.

Jimmy asked, "Can I go south yet?"

"Yes, I think you can find your way without me showing you.  Just follow
the treasure trail."

"Is that this line of hair?"

"Yes.  But don't suck my cock yet."

"Why not?  I really want to try it."

"That's another chapter. You will get to that in due time."

He reached for the tit cups off the side of the tub.  "Can we put these on
you?"

"Sure."

He licked each one and squeezed them and set them firmly over my tits.
Then he pushed the bubbles aside--they were starting to dissipate
again--and kissed down my stomach and licked back and forth over my abs,
over every inch of the wide lumps of muscle. I held my cock to the side and
it was drooling precum on my forearm.  Jimmy put his face in the water and
eagerly kissed around the base of my cock, then moved down to my balls that
he lifted up in his hand.  I noticed how beautiful even his hands were, his
long fingers holding my balls gracefully without being effeminate.

"You've got really nice balls, they're so big and heavy," he said between
licks. He sucked one into his mouth. He didn't open wide enough and it
hurt.  He saw me wince and quickly released it.

"I'm sorry, was that too rough?" he asked, looking up at me with concern.

I smiled at his innocent concern. "No, just a tight fit. You need to open
your mouth a little more."

"Okay." He took the other one into his mouth, more easily, watching for my
reaction.

I reached down with my hand on his head and pressed his face into the
water, into my crotch and at the same time I lifted up a little. He
responded eagerly, pushing his face harder, and began sucking and mauling
my ball with his tongue. I winced again but kept my hand firmly on his head
and quickly said, "Ohh, yeah, you're doing that right, Jimmy.  You can suck
it harder."

The next few minutes were a mix of wonderful pleasure and dull pain.  He
was so exuberant.  He reminded me of a hungry calf after its mother's teat.
He sucked hard and it hurt and felt wonderful at the same time, till I
couldn't take any more and I eased his head away.  He kept hold of my nut
and pulled on it till it popped free of his mouth.

"Was that okay, did it hurt any? I want to do this right," he said.

"Some, but it was a wonderful hurt. You did fine."

"Want me to do the other one?" he asked as he kissed the inside of my
thigh.

"If you want to."  And I rose up out of the water again.

I think he did it on purpose, played me, worked me, and distracted me.  He
was sucking on my other nut and rubbing his hands up and down my thighs and
reaching down to squeeze my calf muscles. He popped it free and licked it
as he brought his hands back up my thighs, up to my hips, then suddenly he
took hold of my cock.

"I want your cock, dammit."  And before I knew it, the words barely out of
his mouth, he lifted my cock up out of the water and took it in his mouth.

"Aww, Jimmy!" I gasped with surprise. I wasn't expecting his slick move and
I wasn't prepared for the exquisite feeling of his virgin mouth on my cock.
Virgin lips and tongue are always the best.  It was funny the way he held
my cock in a tight grip with both hands as if he was afraid I would take it
away from him.  I didn't.  He had jumped the gun but there was no way I was
going to stop him.  I thought it was cute and even masterful, the way he
seized control of the situation. Instead, I laid my hand on his head to
signal that it was okay with me.

He loosened his grip around my cock and began stroking up and down as he
slurped the head.

He stopped once to observe that his hand didn't fit all the way around the
shaft. He squeezed and his fingers still didn't touch.  He laughed and
said, "Damn!" and got back on my cock. He squeezed and milked it upward to
force the precum out.  He said it tasted good and asked me if it felt good,
what he was doing.

"You don't ever have to ask that, Jimmy," I told him.

He smiled at my answer, sort of a proud smile.

"I love your foreskin," he said as he captured my cock again.  He ran his
tongue under the skin all around the head.

"I always wanted to be circumcised," I said.

"Don't ever do that.  I wish I had a glove like this on my cock."

"That's the first time I ever heard it called a glove."

"It's like a glove. It fits around the head so snug but peels back nice and
loose, just like taking off a glove."

I will always remember Jimmy's description of my foreskin.

"It's funny how guys who are cut wish they weren't, and guys who aren't cut
wish they were," I said.

"Your cock is so beautiful, besides being big.  It's a perfect shape.  It's
the nicest cock I've ever seen, even on the net.  You should take a picture
and send it in to one of those sites."

"I don't think so," I said, laughing.

"Why not? Nobody would know except the guys who have seen it up close."

"You talk a lot for a boy who wanted my cock so bad," I joked.

He started licking my cock again, slurping up the precum.  "You won't cum
in my mouth, will you?"

"You could do this all day and I could hold off," I said.  "But you know,
part of the lesson includes taking a load in your mouth. And swallowing," I
added."

"I don't know if I can do that.  I want to, but I don't know if I can."

"You have to do it at least once to see if you like it."

"You're going to make me?" he asked.

"No," I said, laughing.  "But you're the one who skipped to this chapter in
such a hurry."

"I just had to have it.  I love your cock."

"Are you this way with all of your homework?" I asked.

"Only with the subjects I like."

He kept hold of my cock, kept sucking it.

"You lied, Jimmy, you've done this before," I said.

"No, I just wanted to do it so bad."

"You've moved way ahead of my lesson plan," I said.

"Then why don't we move on to the next chapter?"

"Let's go in on the bed," I told him and turned off the jets.

"Not yet, I haven't done your tits," he said. So I let him pull the suction
cups off of my tits.  They really stood up. "Wow! They got huge!"

I knew what to expect, but just watching Jimmy sucking on my tits made my
cock quiver all the harder. He reached down to feel it.  "You're hot wired
too," he said.

"Yeah, you're a wonderful electrician," I joked. "You don't have to be so
gentle," I told him, pressing his face harder against my chest, and he
began nibbling on them. "My nipples are tough and I love them being treated
roughly."

I let him suckle like an overgrown baby till my tits were raw. Then he laid
his head on my chest.  We languished for a couple more minutes before he
moved. As he rose up I asked him to pull the plug. When he bent over his
butt was spread apart right in my face. I clasped his buns and licked up
the middle.

"OHhhh," he gasped with surprise. He stayed bent over and let me lick his
ass.  "Ohhh, let's stay right here."

I gave him a cursory rim job then smacked his butt.  When I got out of the
tub he had a towel held out for me. We dried each other off then I told him
to stand on the stool while I put lotion all over his body. His smooth
muscles took on a sexy, soft sheen with the lotion.

"Do you do this with everybody you have sex with?" he asked.

"No. Very few have such a flawless body."

He laughed at this.

"You're fifteen years old and you don't even have a pimple anywhere on your
body. I thought teenagers are supposed to have pimples."

"I have skin like my Mom.  Can I put lotion on you?" he asked.

"Yes but it won't look as good on me. My body isn't as flawless as yours."

"It's perfect to me, exactly what a man's body should look like."

My cock had calmed down. Now, under his hand, it was rising again.



                                           On The Bed

We went in to the bed. Jimmy climbed in, on his knees, like he was waiting
to be told where to lie down. His cock stood out at a sharp, virile upward
angle, throbbing and quivering.

I reached under the towel and got the studded cock strap. "Have you ever
seen one of these?"

"No."

"Let me put it on you."

"What's it supposed to do?" he asked as I drew the leather strap under his
balls and snapped it around the base of his cock.

"Well, it's going to look great on you for one thing.  See how it feels."

"It feels good.  I like it, how it lifts my balls up. I like the silver
studs."

"You can keep it, and wear it under your shorts."

"It's going to make me look bigger in my jeans, isn't it?"

"It's called packaging the goods," I said.  "Not that you need it. How does
it feel?"

"Good.  I like it."

"Just don't wear it for long periods of time, like all day."

"I have to find a place to hide it," he said, laughing.

I leaned down and took his cock in my mouth.

"Ohh, Fuck!....Ohh, My Godd!" He cried out in total shock. He wasn't
expecting it, and he wasn't expecting how it felt. His eyes were wide and
his arms were flung out in a helpless, "Oh, God, what's happening" kind of
gesture.

I sucked his cock, using long, full strokes, forcing him deep into my
throat.  He was the perfect size for it.

"Ohhhh....OHHHH....Ohhh, Godd, this is incredible!"  And on and on with his
moans.

I gave him about five minutes of it then rose up straight on my knees,
facing him.  My cock was standing out now.  It didn't stand up and quiver
like his, it stood out, pulsating hard, like a lumbering battering ram.
Jimmy looked at it, his eyes looked sort of glazed over. I expected him to
take hold of it but he just gazed at it. I decided to change course.  I
stretched out on the bed.

"Come sit on my face," I told him.

"What?"

"Park that cute little butt on my face.  Pull up my face and sit down.
What part of sit on my face don't you understand?"

"Ohh, Geez."  He straddled me then backed up and brought his butt down over
my face. I took hold of him and brought it right down on my face with my
tongue protruded and waiting.  He cried out when I made contact and he
never stopped moaning the whole time I rimmed him. Tight as he was, he was
also excited, and his hole opened up for me so I was able to push through
and lick the delicate, soft lining up inside him.  He tasted wonderful and
I devoured him as he slid his butt back and forth across my hungry mouth.

I paused to ask, "Do you know what 69 is?"

"Yes.  But I'm almost afraid to.  I'm so hot, I'm afraid I'll cum if I do
it."

"Well, your cock isn't going to fall off if you do. It probably won't even
go down."

"Sometimes it doesn't."

I left his asshole and pulled his balls into my mouth and began stroking
his cock.  He didn't need instructions; he leaned over me and began sucking
my cock.  He sucked me hard; he worked at it, trying to devour more of my
cock than he could handle.

He paused and asked, "Could I be on the bottom?"

I smiled, surprised at his openness.  "Sure."

"I think I can take your cock better if I'm on the bottom."

"If you think I'm going to force you, no," I said.

"I know, but maybe a little force wouldn't hurt."

So we changed positions, I straddled his face and hovered over his middle.
My cock was suspended straight down and when I straddled him about half of
it went into his mouth before he quickly clasped onto my hipbones to stop
it.  So much for a little force, I thought with smile.  His cock, on the
other hand stuck straight up over his abs, throbbing and quivering
madly. It looked like it hurt, he was so hard. I had to pull it up from his
stomach, practically pry it up, so I could take it in my mouth. Like
before, I swallowed him to the hilt.

He groaned loudly and in the process the head of my cock pushed into his
throat. I didn't know if it was accidental or if he got so excited he just
took it. I did feel him lift his head to try to take it deeper so I eased
down a little to give him an assist. As he was able to handle it, I gently
fucked a little way into his throat, but he never took me all the way.

I lifted my head and asked him, "How many times do you want to cum?"

"All I can."

"How many times is that? I just need to gauge things so we cover all the
bases."

He asked, "How many times do you want to cum?"

"That's not an issue," I said.

"I want to try a load in my mouth. You said that's part of the lesson, to
take a load and swallow it."

"Okay, we'll lay out a lesson plan here," I said. "You're going to take a
load in your mouth, and you're going to swallow at least part of it.  I cum
a lot so you can spit the rest out if you want to.  Then you're going to
take a load in your ass."

"We're not using condoms, then."

"No. Well, unless you want to.  But I'm tested and you're a virgin," I said
then went on.  "You're going to give me a load in my mouth, I wanta see
what you taste like, too.  And you'll probably cum when I fuck you. That's
two loads."

"Are you going to fuck me?"

"If you want me to."

"Godd, yess, I want you to.  I think I would die if I left here without
knowing what that feels like."

"Then you won't," I said.  "Then you'll drop a load in my ass when you fuck
me.  That's three."

He eyes popped and he smiled a huge smile.  "You're gonna let me fuck YOU?"

"It's part of your final exam, so when I fuck you, pay attention," I joked
then went back to sucking his cock.

"Oh, My Godd, I can't believe this," he said, and he went back to sucking
me.

Anyone who has been in my position knows it's pretty hard to describe the
feeling of having a young, innocent boy learning to give head on your
cock....and having his young body at your disposal.  It was like that.
Absolute, perfect heaven. We were giving each other some really good head
for quite a while.  I wasn't close, and Jimmy gave no indication that he
was until he started suddenly cumming in my mouth!  I let out a surprised
grunt and gave him my very best for the last many strokes of my mouth and I
really gave him hell with my tongue as he covered it repeatedly with his
warm semen.  Damn, he tasted good, just as I expected.  I savored the warm
nectar, trying to draw out every bit of the flavor before I swallowed it.
He got me so hot that I went off too, before I was ready.

Jimmy let out a squealing groan as I gave him his first taste of cum, other
than his own.  He went nuts.  He became very animated sucking me and
wrapped his arms around my butt and tried to pull my cock deeper into his
mouth, into his throat. I let him have some inches, but restrained him a
little because this wasn't the moment to be trying to swallow my cock, not
while I was pumping his mouth full of thick cum that I didn't know if he
could handle. Besides, I wanted him to get the full taste of the stuff.

I could feel his mouth filling up and he was making the best of it,
swirling it all around my cock like he was trying to make room for more.
He acted like he really liked it; he was sort of whimpering.  Then he began
to come down from it and he was left to lie there with a mouthful of cum.
He was pretty still except for moving his tongue and he wasn't doing that
with as much excitement as before, and he wasn't swallowing. I wasn't going
to make him do it.  I thought I would give him a moment then pull my cock
up and out and let him go spit my load out.

"You don't have to, Jimmy, you can go spit it out," I said as I slowly
eased my hips up.  But before I could pull my cock free, he tightened his
grip on my butt and held me in place, and he began swallowing.  Oh, fuck, I
thought, I hope he doesn't get sick. I didn't think he would get sick from
the taste, but from the amount.  I was ready to move off of him and let him
up at the slightest indication that he might not be able to do it.  But he
didn't try to get up and I didn't move till he laid his arms out to the
side. Then I pulled my cock out of his mouth and lay to the side.

"Goddammn! That was a HUGE load!" he said.

"I know.  Do you feel okay?""

He laughed.  "I feel full.  Damn, man, you do cum like a horse. I didn't
think you were ever going to stop."

"I'll get you a Pepsi" I went to the bathroom and got a cold Pepsi and
popped the tab.  "Here, drink some of this, it'll wash the taste down, and
settle your stomach if it decides to rebel."

He took the can and gulped down quite a bit of it.  "I hate to wash the
taste down, I like it, but I don't know about my stomach."

I stretched out beside him and slid my arm under his head and he moved
against me.

"That was awesome," he said.

"Yes, it was.  You were awesome."

"Did I pass that test?"

"You got an A.  I meant you were awesome in your delivery, too.  You notice
I didn't drink any Pepsi.  You taste good."

We lay for quite a while and talked. He wanted to know about my son, when
he was growing up.  He loved the story about me catching him jacking off.
He said he wished he could meet him; I told him chances of that were pretty
slim.  He wanted to know about my experiences when I was his age. I told
him about my best friend and me starting out in fourth grade.  He liked
hearing about the Army, which surprised me, and wanted to know how it was
to be Bi, and married.  I gave him an overview of things, without much
detail.  Then I told him he could email me with questions.  I think he took
that, that I didn't want use up valuable time to answer any more of his
questions.

"Do you want to fuck me now?" he asked.

"If you still want me to. But the rules change a little here."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I said we wouldn't do anything you didn't want to do, we would stop
anytime you say. Fucking is something I know you want to do but you might
want to stop. We're not going to do that.  Once we get started, there's no
turning back. I'm not going to rape you, but once I penetrate your ass, we
go all the way, that's the only way you will know what it's
like. Understood?"

"Yes."

I kept him in my left arm and tilted the lower part of his body onto his
side. He moved his right leg back over my thigh in a gesture of offering
himself.  I reached behind me and got the lube from the nightstand.  I
flipped the cap open with my thumb and squeezed some in his ass crack then
capped the bottle and tossed it aside.  I began massaging his asshole with
my thumb.

Jimmy moaned softly and closed his eyes.  I began kissing him at the same
time and he twisted his head around so we could kiss on the lips.

"I love this," he murmured.

"You'll more than love it," I said. "You'll be begging for more."

"Are you going to torture me?"

"No, but I will make sure you want it."

"I want it already," he said.

"No you don't. That's your fantasy talking.  You're scared."

"Yes, but I want it," he said.

"When your body wants it as much as your head," I said.

While we were talking I slipped my finger through his hole.  With the lube
it was easy to shove it in all the way. That took him by surprise and his
eyes flew open.

"Wow!  I knew your big fingers would feel like a cock."

"You still don't know what a cock feels like," I reminded him.

I moved my finger around inside his hot ass, very gently, and in and
out. He liked that.

"OHhh, if this is what it feels like to get fucked......."

I didn't search for his prostate but I knew when I found it. So did he. He
lurched and his eyes popped and his mouth flew open, and I could feel the
soft walnut palpitating against my finger.  I didn't do anything except
find it then I held the tip of my finger there, barely touching it.  He
squirmed around to make the connection, and when he did, HE rubbed his
prostate against my fingertip.

"OHHhhh! Ohhh, fuck!  Whoa, that's the spot you told me about!"

"That's your prostate. That's your feel good button."

"My asshole feels good too, tightening around your finger," he said.

"Keep squeezing my finger." I moved my finger back from his love nut.

"Oh, don't take it away," he gasped as he wriggled around, trying to make
contact again.

But I withdrew my finger and began rubbing his hole with two fingers.  He
sensed what was coming and he pushed down on them.  I shoved them both in
as deep as I could. He moved away from my hand but quickly settled back on
it. I moved them around deep inside him, stretching his asshole and getting
him used to the penetration. I avoided his prostate as he squirmed around
to try to connect with my fingers.  I fucked and probed with the two
fingers for a few minutes. His cock was throbbing so hard it was bucking
and quivering.

He winced a little when I used three fingers but he took them bravely and I
could feel his asshole relaxing pretty quick.  This time when I avoided his
prostate he reached down and gripped my hand and held it while he squirmed
around to make the connection.

"OHhhh, yeahhhhhh.....ohhh, fuck," he moaned.

I let him enjoy it for a couple of minutes before I disconnected to do the
work at hand; to fuck and probe and stretch his hole and get him more used
to being penetrated so he could handle my cock.

"Why do you keep taking your fingers away?" he whined.

"For bigger and better things to come," I said.

After a moment I withdrew my fingers and felt his asshole.  It was gaping
open nicely, but gradually squeezing shut.  Several times I let it close up
then stretched it open again. Each time he pushed down on my fingers.

He groaned louder and pressed his head back against my arm when I used four
fingers but I didn't relent. I shoved them all in and spread them apart
inside him and twisted my hand around.  His asshole tightened and I knew he
was trying to work through the little bit of pain I was causing.  That was
just what I wanted him to do.  I really gouged him out with my four
fingers. I wanted to cause him a little pain, knowing it was nothing he
couldn't handle, and probably even welcomed as he was no doubt expecting
it, as I had told him. I also engaged his prostate, rather roughly this
time, and kept the kiss going to muffle his groans and outcries.

He was thrashing around on my hand, literally fucking himself on my
fingers.

"Don't make too much noise," I told him.

"I just want you to fuck me.  Please. I'm ready. I am so ready. You're
driving me crazy," he gasped desperately.

"That's what I want; to be sure you're ready."

"Godd, it feels like my ass could take a horse," he said. He laughed. "What
am I saying; it's going to take a horse."

I laughed.  "You've never seen a horse fuck.  A stallion would impale you."

"And you're not?  Shit, you've got the biggest cock in captivity."

I nudged the head of my cock against my hand, into the palm.  Jimmy looked
at me, right in my eyes and I saw his anticipation and the lust burning
there, and his fear as he realized it was going to happen.

"Do you want a moment to bid farewell to your virginity?" I asked with a
grin.

"Fuck my virginity. Fuck it away. I don't know why it's worth saving
anyway."

I pushed my cock harder into my palm, into the crook of the four fingers
that were inside the boy's ass.  I spread them apart and felt his sphincter
muscle give way.  He was ready.  I made it a smooth transition. As I slowly
eased my fingers out I used them as a guide--a chute--and shoved my cock
in.  It was almost transparent; I didn't know if he even knew when my cock
had replaced my fingers till he saw my hand.

"Ohh, fuck, you're in me!"

"A little ways," I said.

I eased a few inches through his hole then began sliding it back and forth.

"OOhhhhh.....Ohhh, Godd.....Ohhhhh.....ohhhh...ohhh fuck."

I wasn't fucking him...didn't intend to yet...as much as I was getting him
used to my cock. "That didn't even hurt, did it?"

"Not enough to matter," he said. "Not near as much as it feels good.  Godd,
it feels wonderful.  How much is in me? Are you going to give me the rest
of your cock?" He started to reach down to feel but I brushed his hand
away.

"You'll know when I do." I didn't intend to fuck him in that position.  I
wanted him on his back with his legs up high and wide and me over him; I
wanted him to feel the full impact of being fucked, my cock buried in as
deep as it could possibly go, and that had to be on his back.  I stroked
those inches back and forth several times then pulled out.

"OHh, how come you took it out?" he gasped.

I didn't answer him.  I held my cock in my fist and pumped the head of my
cock in out of his gaping clinching hole over and over again. Again and
again I paused for it to start to close up, then shoved my cock through to
stretch it open again, trying to make it give up.  After a few minutes of
that, I took his hand and brought it down for him to feel his gaping hole.

"Wow!  I'm wide open!" he exclaimed as he shoved several of his fingers
inside his hole.

"You see what I'm doing now," I said. "I want you totally relaxed."

"And stretched," he said.

I gave his asshole a few more jabs then rose up. I positioned myself
between his legs and brought them up for him to hold and I shoved my cock
back in.  For good measure I took one of the pillows and folded it in half
and shoved it under his hips. Then I began fucking him, using about the
same inches as before at first, then going in about an inch deeper each
time.  He was fine till I was about two thirds of the way in and my cock
encountered obstacles in its path; I could tell when he winced a couple of
times. With my cock firmly lodged, I leaned down over him on my arms with
my face right over his.

"Okay, let's take it home," I said.

"Ohhh, this is so scary," he said.

"It shouldn't be.  I haven't hurt you so far, have I?"

"No."

"This isn't going to hurt you either. I can tell by your face when it does
and I'll know when to move a different way."

"It felt like you hit something; are you g-gonna shove it all the way in
me?"

"Yes. Every inch. You said you wanted it. Don't worry we'll get past the
obstacle." I smiled and kissed him on the forehead.  "You know you would
never forgive yourself if you didn't take me all the way.  And I know you
don't want to leave here without knowing what it feels like to be really,
totally fucked."

It took a couple of minutes and some deft maneuvering to work past the
obstacles deep inside him, and I knew when I had. I felt a give and a
sudden, total opening up as the head of my cock pushed the final couple of
inches into the very depths of the boy's body.  And Jimmy's eyes widened
and he whimpered a little gasping moan of pleasure as I smashed my loins
hard against his spread butt.

"Oh, My Godd, I can't believe this!....can't believe anything can feel like
this."

"You haven't really felt anything yet, I haven't started fucking you," I
said jokingly. Then I did.  I eased back those couple of inches and shoved
back through the opening deep inside him that my cock had either found or
created. Jimmy whined and moaned and pushed against me. I pushed back,
harder, and twisted my butt around, and he cried out.  It was pleasure, not
pain. I was a little surprised and frankly proud that he was taking me so
bravely, especially as a virgin. I fucked him deep like that, using just
those last two inches that included the wide head of my cock. Then
gradually, I eased back a little more each time, adding an inch or so with
each stroke, till I was long cocking him.  Not hard, but I as slicing
through his ass with long, determined strokes, in a path that wasn't going
to close up any time soon. I fucked him.  Jimmy moaned the whole time.

He reached for his cock a couple of times and whined that I was torturing
him again when I brushed his hand away.

"No, I wanta do that," I told him as I took hold of his cock. I spit in my
hand and stroked him in tandem with my own cock thrusts into his ass.

It was pleasure the rest of the time I fucked him, which was quite a
while. In minutes, I suppose it was well over a half hour, maybe three
quarters. There was a lot of kissing, too.  Jimmy liked kissing and he was
good at it.

I had decided I wouldn't bother with different positions. We didn't need to
explore all the different positions for him to leave knowing what it was
like to be fucked. And I sort of wanted to save that for other new, younger
partners he might find to explore with him.

"Jimmy, I can blow any time you think you might be ready," I told him.

"I wanta keep doing this all day, but I want to cum, too.  And I want to
feel you cum in me."

"I think you will. You let me know when you're ready. Just give me a few
strokes heads up; I'll try to get us off together."

Toward the end I slipped my arm under him and held him tight, pulling his
body up against mine.  I wanted him as close to me as humanly
possible. Between kissing him I leaned down and sucked his tits. He liked
that.

The connection with Jimmy was tighter than just the physical. I thought of
another fifteen year old, more worldly, who had taken MY virginity. I have
made this sound like it was totally about Jimmy, and he was absolutely my
focus, but that is not to say that I only filled the role of tutor.  Far
from it.  If you met Jimmy you would know it to be impossible not to feel
the almost overwhelming pleasure that can come from such a perfect specimen
of young virginity. He was learning the ways of the flesh but it would take
much time and much experience for him to realize that all who experienced
the privilege of his perfect young body would fall in love with it and
never want to let him go.

I let these lofty thoughts permeate my mind as I made love to the boy.
Yes, it transcended the mere flesh and was way more than fucking him. I did
not fall in love with Jimmy.  I would not allow that.  But for much of the
time that I was fucking him, I permitted myself to love him.

"Jimmy...babe...I could do this all day too, but I wanta cum."

He smiled and said all right. I picked up the pace. I took his hand and put
it on his cock.

"You know your cock better than anyone else.  I'll play with your balls," I
said.

He laughed as he began stroking his cock. "Finally, you're letting me have
my own cock."

I stopped in mid stroke, with my cock about half way out.

"Why'd you stop?"

"You are a little wise ass," I said.

He squirmed around, trying to take my cock back inside his ass but I kept
it just out of full reach.

"Aww, please, don't do this to me," he whined.  "You said you wanted to
cum."

"I have this sudden urge to plow you," I said.

"I don't know exactly what that means, but if it means fucking me really
hard, I wouldn't mind."

"It means fucking you really hard.  Nailing your sweet ass to the bed."

"Then do it.  Godd, yess fuck my ears off."

I shifted into high gear and fucked him hard, like a jack hammer and a pile
driver combined. He had to pull the other pillow over his face to muffle
his outcries.  At the end I twisted and squeezed his balls while he jacked
himself to a climax. His ass brought me to mine, that and just watching
him. It wasn't a "making love" type climax; it was raw lust and pure sex
that propelled us both over the brink. He started cumming only seconds
before I did. I felt it in his ass before it happened and I jerked the
pillow off his face and tossed it aside, then there was cum spurting clear
up to his face and in his hair.

My cock exploded deep inside him. I stroked two or three times while it was
cumming then I buried my cock and let it finish pumping him full of my hot
cum. He groaned/whimpered that he could feel it. We stayed like that for
several minutes, him trying to get his breath while I just looked down into
those beautiful brown eyes and that killer smile and filled him with cum.

"Well, do you feel like you've been fucked?" I asked after a moment.

"I feel like I've been drilled," he said.  Then he said, "Yess, I
absolutely feel like I've been fucked and it's the most wonderful feeling
in the world.  I could never imagine anything could feel like that."

I tightened my arm around his waist and turned us over so he was on top.
"Let's lay like this for a while," I said as I pulled him down on top of
me. He laid his head on my shoulder and the pillow.

"Your cum is draining out of me," he said.

"That's okay, we don't have to wash the sheets," I said.

"Can we do this again sometime?"

"I've been dreading you asking that," I said.

"Why?"

"Because I have to answer it.  And the answer is no, we can't." He looked
sadly disappointed.  "You understood that from the beginning," I said.

"I know, but I was hoping you would change your mind."

"It's just not a good idea.  THIS wasn't a good idea," I said.

"I hate these stupid laws," he said. "Why should a bunch of pricks in
Washington or the state decide when I can have sex and with who?"

"We have to have those laws to protect little kids," I said.  "But I agree,
at fifteen, you should be able to make those decisions yourself; hell, even
at fourteen.

"At the very least, if I'm able to cum, then I'm sure old enough to have
sex.  Eighteen is way too old."

"I agree.  They've got the age limits all screwed up.  Kids can vote at
eighteen and they can go in the military but they can't drink. Personally,
I don't think eighteen year olds should be voting but if they're mature
enough to vote at that age then they're mature enough to drink.  I've
always thought anyone in uniform should be able to walk into a bar and show
his ID and order a beer, in any state, no matter how old he is."

"What's really dumb is, I can join the Army or the Marines when I'm
seventeen, with my parents' permission, but I can't have sex with who I
want."

"Well, I can tell you from experience, the uniform attracts girls, and I
doubt any girl is going to ask any guy in uniform for his ID to be sure
he's old enough to fuck her.  And I KNOW so-called underage guys who have
gotten into whorehouses."

"You, right?" he said, laughing.

"Me, for one. There were three or four us, we were probably juniors, we
climbed over a brick wall and went in the back way and she let us in."

"You are funny, Pete, and you've had so many experiences."

"More than you ever need to even think about," I said.

I eased him up a little so he would rise up off of me. He took a long time
rising up from my cock; it was embedded a long way in him.

"Ohh, it's running out," he said when my cock popped free.

I felt it.  "Don't worry about it.  We'll shower," I said.

We showered together.  I washed him while he washed me.  I paid particular
attention to his ass, feeling from time to time to see how it was closing
up.  He would be fine.

"Are we going to do the last chapter....my third load?" he asked as we
drying off.

"I've forgotten what that chapter was about," I said.

He laughed.  "No, you haven't.  You're just trying to get out of it.  It's
about me fucking you."

"Oh, yeah, how could I forget something like that."

"I think I'm ready for the test if you are," he said.

"All right, we'll see.  But the tutoring is over.  You're on your own."

"Does that mean I have to wrestle you to the floor or something? Cause if
it does, I'm obviously toast."

"No, it means you're in charge," I said.

"All right," he said with a smirking grin. "How about we start right here."

"You're in charge," I told him again.

"Don't go away," he said.  I waited while he went into the bedroom and came
back with the lube.  He tossed it on the sink then he took hold of my hips
and turned me around. He put his hands on my shoulder and the small of my
back to bend me over the sink, then he went down on his haunches behind
me. He kneaded my butt muscles and licked them all over pulled them apart
to lick between them.

"I love your butt," he murmured.

"I love what you're doing to my butt," I said. I could see his head and
shoulders in the mirror and he looked so fuckin' cute back there.

I've always said you gotta want it to be any good at it.  Jimmy wanted it.
He loved rimming, and he was good at it.  I put my hand on his head and
pulled his face tighter into my butt.  He moaned and tried to get his
tongue in deeper.  I reached back with both hands with my fingers deep in
the crevice and stretched my hole open wider.

"Ohh, fuck," he whispered as he dove in.

He gave me an excellent rim job.  Given enough time he could have gotten me
off doing that but this was only a prelude.....foreplay. I was going to get
fucked. After quite a while he stood up and reached for the lube.

"I think I've got you good and ready," he said as he uncapped the lube.

"You had me ready a long time ago, stud," I told him.

He looked at me in the mirror and smiled.  Shit, just his smile could
almost make me go off. He lubed up my ass, using two then three fingers, in
real deep.  Then he lubed up his cock then wiped his hand on the towel.

"Do you like it slow and easy, or hard and rough?" he asked as he aimed his
cock.

"I'm putting myself in a mindset where I don't have any choice," I said.
"I told you, you're in charge. I take it however you give it to me."

"I like the way you think and say things, Pete. They should teach sex in
school....I mean ALL about sex....and you should teach it."

'"You find me a classroom full of willing students, I'll be glad to teach
it," I said.

His cock was at my hole, pushing against it.  It was neat the way he did
it.  He stood with his feet set apart, hands on his hips; he aimed his cock
and shoved in.  Just like that.  Then he clasped his hands around my hip
bones to pull me back tight against him.

I wasn't expecting what he did and I gasped, "Aww, Fuck!"

"That didn't hurt, did it?  That's what you told me," he said.

"I didn't ram a steel bar up your ass," I said.

"No, you just shoved a rubber hose in my ass so far it came out my mouth,"
he said. "We could go in on the bed and I could be real loving, but I don't
think you want to be made love to.  I think you'd rather be fucked."

I wanted to tell him that making love probably wouldn't be a good idea,
`cause I wouldn't want to let him go. He was right, I liked to be fucked,
and I especially like Jimmy fucking me.  He had plenty of equipment to do
the job, and he had learned well, from me or from watching porn.  I bent
down across the sink and jutted my butt back to him and he fucked me.

I reached down for my cock.  Jimmy grabbed my hand.  "No, no, you don't get
to do that, you wouldn't let me."  I laughed and brought my hand back and
laid my arm back across the sink.

I was surprised he lasted as long as he did. He really plowed some
ground. He liked watching himself in the mirror, and he made all kinds of
little moves like twisting his hips around to make his cock lob around and
gouge inside me.

"Ohh, fuck, Jimmy," I moaned.

"Is this okay, the way I'm doing it?"

"Shit, yeah!  Fuck, Jimmy, are you sure you wanta be gay?  If he girls knew
you could fuck like this they would be clawing to get in your jeans."

"I want guys to be clawing to get in my jeans," he said.

"They will, son, they will," I assured him.

"Do you like it?" he asked as he fucked me.  "Do you like how I'm fucking
you?"

"You don't have to ask that, either, not ever," I said. "Hell, yeah, I like
how you're fucking me."

A dozen strokes later; "Do you want to go in on the bed?"

"If that's where you want me. I told you, you're in charge."  And I liked
letting him be in charge.  He was such a man about it.  He pulled out and
took me by the waist and turned me around.

I flopped on the bed on my stomach.  He said he would like me on my back,
like I'd fucked him, so I turned over and brought my legs up.

He laughed and said, "Man, you're ready for it, your ass is wide open."

"Damn right. I know a good thing when I've got it right in front of me."

Jimmy positioned himself and slid in.  In that position he went in deeper
and I felt it.  "Ohh, Fuck!" I said as he pushed hard against my butt.  If
this kid was perfect in body to behold, he was no less perfect in cock or
motion.  I think all boys are born with the basic instinct for fucking but
I was expecting a little awkwardness. Jimmy wasn't awkward; he knew what he
was doing. He held my legs out by my ankles and plowed into me. He pretty
much turned me into his slut.

"OHh, fuck yeah......fuck me, Jimmy....fuck my brains out," I moaned.  I
reached for my cock again and he brushed it away again.

"You don't have to do that, I'll make you cum," he said.

"You little prick," I said, laughing.

"Oh, you're gonna get it now.  I am gonna fuck your ears off."

I liked him being so playful, it showed that he'd shed all inhibitions. He
sort of threw my legs out to the side and hunkered down over me and started
fucking me hard.  I mean, really hard. He was like the combination I gave
him....jack-hammer and pile-driver combined, with gusto. He fucked me so
hard he was taking my breath away.  He wasn't little, and his cock was
stiff as a board and there was no give to it like mine. He was in charge of
me and his cock was in charge of my ass.  What might be left of it, I
thought.  If it weren't so fuckin' good I could say he brutalized
me. Everything he did, I let him, of course, but in my mind I was helpless
but to endure whatever he did.  Time was gone; I was just holding on, with
no concept of how long he fucked me.  It wasn't long, I was sure, but it
didn't have to be. At the end, with an almost angry snort, he clamped his
mouth over mine and he kissed me.  WE kissed, but he was in charge of that
too.  He kissed me as hard as he was fucking me.  Still breathing hard and
snorting and whimpering, he said he was cumming.  I grabbed my cock and he
didn't stop me this time. The rest was pretty much a blur.  I was aware of
him getting his nut, like a young pony with his first mare, and I was aware
of me cumming all over both of us but my awareness was blurred.

As I was coming out of the momentary blur I thought, Holy Shit! And I
thought I was good.

Jimmy stayed on top of me, hard and tight; he was holding onto me and
whispering, "Ohh, Godd....Ohh, Godd....Ohh, fuckin; Godd...."

I locked my arms tight around him.  "Say that once for me."

After a moment he pushed himself up.  My cum clung to us like strings of
glue.  "Oh, Pete!  That was the most awesome fuckin' thing that ever
happened to me."

I laughed softly, thinking, happened to him?  He had no clue what he'd just
done to me.

"I hope it was good for you, I hope I did it right my first time."

"Holy Shit, Jimmy, you need to be making porn!" I was still breathing hard.
"I forgot to tell you, my insurance doesn't cover rebuilding my ass."

"You're funny, Pete."

"I was only being half funny," I said. "That was the hardest fuck I've had
in a LONG time.  Wow!  I still think you lied.  I haven't taught you a
thing, you already knew everything."

"No I didn't.  Serious.  That was the first time I ever fucked anybody
except my fist. It's the first time I ever did any of this stuff. Are you
just saying that to make me feel good?"

I rubbed my hand in the cum all over my stomach and chest. "Does this look
like I'm saying it just to make you feel good?"  Then I rubbed my hand in
the cum on Jimmy's stomach.

"I wish I could shoot like you do."

"Stop wishing," I said.  "Godd, Jimmy, you just about fucked me silly."

He smiled a huge smile and lay back down on me and I hugged him tight. It
was then that I realized that he was still boned up!

"What the hell is that," I said, squeezing my asshole really tight around
his cock.

"I told you, sometimes it doesn't go down right away."

"What's right away?" I asked.

"Sometimes I have to jack off a second time."

"You wanta do it again, don't you."

"Yes, if you'll let me."

"Damn, Jimmy if I had you around I would have to have the paramedics on
speed dial."

Jimmy fucked me again. Not as hard, thank god, because my ass was a little
sore.  But I didn't say anything.  I didn't get off a second time--I didn't
need to--but he did.  Even getting his nut was a lot gentler. And I held
him again. It didn't feel like his cock went down after his second nut.

I held him tight against me and said, "Make that thing go down, Jimmy,
`cause that was your last fuck of the day, unless you find a dog in heat on
the way home."

The minutes were ticking away and I was starting to feel melancholy.  I
knew it had to be a one-time thing but I was asking myself why. Nothing as
wonderful as this should be one time only, although I knew it couldn't ever
be duplicated. And it couldn't be repeated.  Then I asked myself, why not?
Why not with me while he searched for his first younger partner? But it was
only mental rhetoric. There couldn't be a repeat because another time would
leave to another and another........

"We have to be going, Jimmy," I said.

"I've been dreading you saying that. What am I supposed to do now?" he
asked as he shoved himself up.  The cum was getting sticky.  "I've learned
all of this and now I don't have anybody to do it with. I can't be fucking
the neighbor's dogs all the time."

"We've gone over that, Jimmy, how to meet other boys."

"But what if I don't?"

"You will.  You know now to keep your eyes open. Visit the mall, like I
said, go to Abercrombie and Hollister's.  Be aware of those around you at
the pool.  Buy a Speedo swim suit. That's where you can really shine, where
that great body is exposed for all the world to see.  And wear the cock
strap under your suit."

"I'm going to do everything you say, but if it doesn't work......"

"No," I cut in. "But I want you to email me and keep me posted on
everything.  Will you do that?"

He said he would because he might have more questions.

We got up and showered together. We dried off and Jimmy got dressed.  Jimmy
was slow about getting dressed. He ran around in his shorts while he
gathered up the BOD I'd bought for him and put it in the bag.

"You're not leaving?  You're meeting somebody else?" he joked.

"Not hardly.  I have to gather stuff up. And we can't be seen leaving
together."

As an afterthought, I took one of the dildos from under the towel on the
night stand.

"Listen, Jimmy, I have this," I said as I showed him the dildo.  "Do you
know what it is?"

"Yes, it's a dildo. I never saw a real one before, but it's shaped like a
cock so I know that's what it is."

"You can have it if you want, if you have a place to hide it."

"Yes, I know where I can keep it.  Thanks," he said excitedly. He laughed
and said, "I wish I had a replica of your cock."

"If I ever get one made I'll give you the first edition," I joked.

He was dressed now and it was an awkward moment.

"Don't let anybody catch you with that bag," I warned.

"I won't even take it in the house.  I know a place up overhead in the
garage."

"Well, then......."

"I don't know how to thank you, Pete."

"You don't thank me, Jimmy.  Believe me, the pleasure was all mine."

"Not hardly."

"You're a special kid, Jimmy."

"You will always be a special man."

"Good. I'm flattered."

We were edging towards the door.

"How do you want me to leave?" he asked.

"Just walk out and walk away, just like you came," I said. "Don't look
suspicious or guilty, and don't look back," I added.

I let him open the door and I stood back from it.

"Well, goodbye," he said. Then he closed the door, and whatever made him do
that pulled us together into a tight hug and a hard, passionate kiss.
Godd, that boy could kiss.

"I had to do that," he said.

"I'm glad you did."  This time I opened the door.  "Don't look back, and
don't wave," I told him.

He didn't.  He walked off with a confident stride that I was proud off.  He
was going to be okay.

Question was, would I?

When he was gone the room felt empty.  I felt very alone.  I got a cold
beer and sat in the chair and stared at the bed.  The room was dim; I
didn't know when the candles had all gone out.  Probably when I sucked all
the oxygen out of the room when Jimmy was fucking me.  I smiled.  Godd,
that boy could fuck!  And it wasn't something I'd taught him.  He just
knew. I sat and sipped the beer and tried to relive every moment.  I needed
to make some notes while it was all fresh in my mind. Suddenly I needed to
be gone, out of the room.  I poured the rest of the beer in the sink and
got dressed.

I drove to a cafe I'd passed and went in with my writing pad in hand.  I
slid into a booth and ordered coffee. Then I began to write.  I smiled; my
ass felt like Jimmy had taken my virginity again.

Driving home, I realized I'd forgotten to give Jimmy my shorts I promised
him.  Fine, I would keep them as my own memento. I would think of him every
time I wore them.  I would think of Jimmy a lot more often than I wore
those shorts.

There was an email from Jimmy when I got home.  I didn't open it.  I wasn't
scared to.  It wasn't that.  It was more like....like dessert, and I wanted
to save it.

				  The End

Update: I have seen Jimmy since.  He's found someone.  That's another
story; I'm working on it.