Trading my secret

A story by Anton Nelson

Chapter One

First, let me introduce myself shortly: I'm Toby, a typical blond boy of the age of twelve. Well, most often people think I am actually ten, as I am quite small and I haven't really started puberty yet. But don't be fooled, I've been jerking off for almost two years now and I can cum a few droplets already! Also, I'm gay, and that I have known for probably longer than that, but that's a secret my parents don't know about. I don't have many friends, or at least none that I am very close to, so I haven't had the chance to fool around with boys my age. But anyway, let me tell you about my story.

It all began on a Friday evening. My parents had invited several friends for a party to celebrate their 15 years of marriage. As usual, there were two tables available to the guests: One for the adults and one for the kids. Since I'm twelve, I ended up with the other small brats, who were on average seven/eight years old. So you can imagine that I was seriously bored. It's not that I didn't enjoy their company, but since I'm in middle school now, their little games didn't interest me that much.

When the last guests arrived, the adult table ended up being full, and a guy I didn't know, who looked like he was in his twenties, came to sit at our kids table. I found it odd that the other adults didn't squeeze together a bit to make some room for him, but they didn't seem to care. It didn't matter to me in the end, as I was quite happy not to be the oldest person at the table who had to watch over the other kids. But quickly I noticed that this guy didn't care about us at all, as he spent his time tapping on his phone. Curious, I peeked from time to time to try to see what he was doing. After a few attempts I finally recognised what I saw on the screen. It was Clash of Clans, my favorite strategy game! So I gathered my courage and asked him:

- So you play Clash of Clans ! What level are you?

The young adult first glanced at me with an annoyed look, but then seized me up and suddenly his attitude changed completely and he gave me a big smile. I happen to often have this effect on people. As my mom often says, I look like an angel with my blond curls and my blue eyes, and that makes people behave nicely to me.

- Well I have most units at max level, how about you? he asked me in a friendly voice.

- Wow you're good ! I told him. I'm only level 10 but I'm pretty decent!

He then smiled at me again, before showing me his base and everything he had built around it in the game. It was quite impressive to me, and I started admiring this young stranger, especially since he was talking to me so nicely. He finally introduced himself as Jayden, the son of Robert, a colleague of my dad. He was quite a handsome guy, with messy hair and a clean-shaven face.

We did some small talk during the meal, talking about the common games we had on our phones, but also about trivial things like school and sports. I think my parents noticed that I had made a new friend, because once the dinner was over, my mom said to me:

- Toby, why don't you show your new friend Jayden your room?

I blushed, a little embarrassed that she treated Jayden like if he was a kid of my age. I then looked at Jayden to see his reaction, but he just shrugged his shoulders as if to say that it didn't bother him and that he had nothing better to do anyway. I got up and we both went up to my room. Knowing that we were going to have guests, I had tidied up my room nicely so I was quite proud to show it off like this, and Jayden seemed satisfied when he entered.

- Nice, he said, looking at the posters and figurines I had on my shelf.

I closed the door so we would not be bothered and sat down on the bed, not really knowing what to do then. Jayden sat down in front of my desk and looked around as if he was inspecting my room. After a minute of silence he said to me:

- Well, hand me over your phone then, I'm gonna improve your defence line.

I hesitated for a moment, but his outstretched hand forced me to make a decision quickly, and I ended up giving him my phone with the game open. He then tapped on my phone, but from where I sat, I couldn't see much. So I took my comic book and read a little while waiting for him to finish.

But after a few minutes I saw him laughing, which wasn't quite the reaction I expected from someone playing Clash of Clans.

- What is it? I asked, a little nervous.

- What's that? he asked with a big smile, showing me a photo of two naked muscular guys kissing.

I recognised the picture instantly, it was one from my hidden folders where I had my -rather private- images. I had already jerked off to this photo a few times, and it was one of my favorites. I didn't understand how he had managed to access this file which I thought I had protected well, and I panicked, not knowing what to say.

- Uh I don't know, it must be a virus, I ended up saying with a nervous voice.

- A virus, my ass! The file is called "Hot guys », with three hearts! he said, still laughing.

My face turned all red, and I remained with my head down, ashamed, not knowing what to do. I wanted to disappear into the ground. But then, Jayden hit me gently on the shoulder with his wrist.

- Come on, I don't care if you're a faggot. I'm just surprised, that's all, he told me.

I looked up then and saw his friendly gaze again. He didn't seem disgusted with me or angry, which reassured me.

- Yes, but please don't tell my parents, I told him shyly.

- Man you're serious, your parents don't know you're a fag?

Although Jayden didn't seem to have a problem with my sexuality, he didn't use the nicest words to describe it.

- No, they don't know and you can't tell them ! It's a secret, I told him, with my high-pitched voice.

Indeed my parents are quite old-fashioned, and it would be a disaster if they were to find out that I like boys... Jayden then seemed to think for a moment, as if what I had just told him was of great importance.

- You know, our parents are good friends, and I think it's important that I tell them about it, it would be wrong to hide it from them... he said.

I panicked again, completely overwhelmed by what he was telling me.

- No, but I'm serious, don't tell them, please! My life depends on it!

- Maybe I can keep this secret for you, he said. But I need something in return.

- Yes anything you want, I told him.

He then seemed to think for a moment, before getting up and coming to sit next to me on the bed.

- Well, maybe in exchange, you could give me a hand, if you see what I mean, he said with a wink.

I didn't understand what he meant, so I frowned.

- Let me explain to you. Because of this shitty party, I didn't have time to jerk off today, so I'm quite tense right now. So I'm thinking that since you're gay, you might as well help me out with that, he said, looking me in the eyes with the utmost seriousness of the world.

At first I was quite shocked by the fact that he spoke to me about his sex life without any embarrassment, something no adult had ever done with me. But I was all the more shocked when I understood the meaning of his words, and what he was suggesting I should do to him. At first I felt anxiety about it, but then anger finally took over.

- You can dream! I'm only twelve you know, and then I've never done stuff like that! I told him, in a shrill voice.

- Listen, it's up to you, he said while getting ready to get up.

- No, but wait... I told him, grabbing his arm to stop him.

He looked at me, with a questioning look, but I remained still without saying anything, thinking about what I could do. But Jayden eventually took the lead and opened up his jeans before lowering them to his knees while gauging my reaction. I then saw his muscular legs in front of me as well as his tented underwear. And before I could say anything else, he lowered his boxers, revealing a long, thick and hard cock.

I was instantly amazed by the size of his dick, which must have been at least twice the size of mine. I had occasionally seen big cocks in the porn I watched, but we had been told in sex ed class that it didn't represent reality at all and that average size was much lower, so I had gotten used to this idea. But Jayden's cock must have been at least 8 inches (20 cm), and at that moment, I would have liked to tell my teacher that he was talking crap.

- Yeah I know, it's a big one, he said with pride.

He then pulled the foreskin of his cock, revealing a pink and shiny head, before approaching me. I knew what he wanted from me, and I also knew that I didn't really have a choice if I wanted him to keep my secret. It wasn't that Jayden didn't attract me, or that I didn't like his cock, but that wasn't really how I had imagined my first time with a guy. And then there was the age difference, the fear that my parents would come into the room at any time, and lots of other things... Yes I know, I'm very anxious by nature and I worry too much, that's what my mom often says. But that's just the way I am. So I just stood still, staring at his huge member.

Jayden ended up making the decision for me, as he grabbed my right arm and placed my hand along his big, veiny dick. Instinctively I opened up my fingers to encircle it and immediately felt the warmth and hardness of his throbbing cock. At that moment a silly thought crossed my mind. With all the blood going to his cock, he must feel pretty dizzy? Well it's the kind of stuff I have heard on the playground but it's probably just bullshit.

- You know how it works, right? Jayden asked, seeing that I remained frozen with his cock in my hand.

- Yes of course, I'm not a baby ! I replied, annoyed.

So I got to the task of jerking off this monster of a cock that barely fit in my wrist. Of course I knew how to do it, as I had done it to myself many times, but this was a completely different size that what I was used to and I had to try out different positions with my arm in order to find the best way to do it. Once I found a good way to hold his dick, I focused on the task, pulling his skin up and down well without forcing too much and with a steady rhythm. I didn't even think about the absurdity of the situation anymore, as I was captivated by the thick cock slipping between my fingers.

- Yeah that's good... like that yes... he said while breathing heavily.

I did my best to give him pleasure, knowing that the better I did, the sooner it would be over and I would be free of this burden. Just a little handjob, and in exchange I could continue to be a good straight boy for my parents. It was worth it, after all.

So with my free hand, I came to grab the base of his cock, to keep it straight while I jerked him off firmly with my wrist. From time to time, I would slow down, and pull his skin all the way down in order to reveal his nice pink head, and would then jerk him faster. It seemed to work quite well as Jayden was moaning and twitching his legs as I did so.

- Oh boy, that's so good. You're such a good wanker Toby.

Compliments always make me blush. So I blushed like an idiot and Jayden was amused by my embarrassment.

- You're so damn cute, you know that? he said looking at me while I was still masturbating him with both hands.

If I knew? Oh yes, the girls did not fail to tell me so. But I'm tired of just being "cute", I don't want to be treated like a kid anymore. But I remained silent and did my best to please Jayden as he stared at me intensely.

Sitting next to each other was not so ideal, and I began feeling a pain in my right arm and struggled to keep a good rhythm. Jayden eventually noticed and went to lay down on my bed, giving me better access to his cock. It was much easier that way and less tiring for my arm.

Jayden seemed to appreciate it too since his breathing suddenly changed and he closed his eyes. I realised that he was close to cumming. I then thought that with this big thing he had between his legs, he must also have a huge amount of sperm. And I certainly didn't want him to stain my sheets or clothes ! But I barely had any time to think of a solution since a few seconds later, Jayden tensed his legs and opened up his eyes widely, signalling his incoming orgasm. Panicked, I placed my left hand over his cock, as I continued to jerk his fat cock with my right hand.

Suddenly I felt the juice flow through his cock and spurt out from the head, and I was very happy that I had put my hand there because his cum hit my palm with such force that I dared not imagine the disaster that it would have been in my bedroom.

And it didn't stop after one spurt, no, it was several long jets of white liquid which came to fill my fingers as Jayden seemed to enjoy a powerful orgasm. I was envious when I saw his face twist with such pleasure. I thought to myself that with double the size, he should have at least double the pleasure. But hey, I'll also grow up eventually, just like others in my class who have already started their puberty. It's just a shame that I'm so behind everyone else.

As I was once again daydreaming and thinking, it took me a while to notice that the liquid had stopped flowing and that Jayden was now up on his elbows looking at me again. I then let go of his long cock, which was slowly softening, and inspected my sticky hands. The sperm was very white and viscous and my fingers were full of it.

- What am I gonna do with this? I asked him, a bit disgusted.

- I don't know, just eat it? he said with an amused look, as he put his clothes back on.

I had no desire to do that, especially since the liquid had started to dry. Seeing no other solution, I opened the door to my room discreetly and looked from left to right. No one in sight! I then quickly headed for the bathroom and ran hot water over my soiled hands. The cum stuck on my fingers and I had to put a good dose of soap before my hands eventually got cleaned. It sure wasn't the same thing as the two or three drops that came out of my little boycock when I jerked off...As I dried my hands, I heard my mother's voice from afar.

- It's time for dessert, boys !

Luckily we were done and I immediately went into the dining room and sat down at the kids table once again. Jayden burst in a few seconds later, with a big smile, as if nothing had happened. To be honest, I was a little angry with him and didn't really want him to sit down next to me. He had taken advantage of me to satisfy his own needs and had blackmailed me and that wasn't nice at all. But as he sat next to me, he became a nice person once again, as if emptying his balls had relieved him of a pressure. And he ended up building me a nice base in Clash of Clans, just as he had promised me, so when the evening was over, I wasn't really mad at him anymore. Especially since he told several times I was such a smart boy, and as I've said, I am very sensitive to flattery ! So that was enough to brighten up the rest of my evening.

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Over the next few days, I thought about Jayden and this unusual situation. Although I felt a little disturbed at first, I quickly moved on and did not thought about it anymore. What was done was done, and there was no reason to hold onto the past. But while I wasn't thinking about Jayden anymore, the vision of his fat cock in my small hands began to haunt my thoughts. It was as if having played with his thing had awakened something inside of me. During the day, I would sometimes think about his cock and the feeling I got when it squirted between my fingers. But then when I jerked off in the evening, I could not bare to think about it, and would look at my private folder of handsome men on my phone. Had I taken a certain pleasure in letting myself be abused by Jayden? Probably, but I preferred to bury those feelings for now.

And so after a few days, when I had finally really moved on, I was quite surprised to find Jayden in the living room talking to my parents. I immediately froze in place, imagining the worst. Had Jayden broken our deal and told my parents everything? Was I going to be sent to some military boarding school in a few days? I was already seeing my whole life collapsing in front of me.

But when I saw the smile on my mom's face, I sighed in relief.

- Oh Toby, you're finally home ! Jayden told us about your troubles with schoolwork!

- My troubles? Oh yeah, right ! I said.

I didn't know what Jayden was up to, but I figured I better play along.

- You should have told us sweetheart, she said. Luckily Jayden came to tell us about it, and he's offering to tutor you

What a manipulator ! I thought in my head. And my mom, what a fool she was! She knows I'm one of the most gifted students in my class and she still believed his bullshit about me having difficulties? I wondered who I got my good genes from, sometimes... But anyway, at least my life was safe, for now.

- You two could already start tonight, she said. We planned to get some groceries.

- Uh yeah sure, I said, not too happy about it.

My dad nodded, without saying a word. To tell the truth, he didn't speak very often and it was mostly my mom who decided things. And the two left shortly after, leaving me alone with Jayden. I thought to myself that maybe he needed money and this was the best thing he had came up with.

- Come on, let's go to your room, he said with a big smile.

So we went to my room and I sat at my desk, and pulled out my school books, while Jayden sat on my bed.

- So I have some math homework, we could go through that, I suggested.

- Well I was thinking more of biology lessons, he said.

I didn't really understand why that subject specifically, but I didn't question it and just pulled out my biology book and handed it to him.

- Theory is great, but there's nothing better than practice, he told me with a smirk.

I sat puzzled, staring at him.

- Come and sit next to me, he said.

I sighed and laid down next to him on my bed. And then, without a word, he just slid his pants down to his ankles and pulled down his underwear, proudly showing his big hard cock. I was quite taken aback, not expecting to do that. And then, he just took my hand and placed it on his large balls.

- You see Toby, these are the testicles. This is where sperm is produced.

Then he moved my hand along his cock, as I just let him use me in silence.

- This is the urethra, that's where the sperm passes before being injected into the female.

- I know all that, I'm not stupid, I told him, annoyed.

- Very good Toby, but I'm not done. You see, guys like me, we need to empty our testicles regularly, otherwise we can have health problems.

He then rested my hand on his balls, as if to indicate that they were indeed, full.

- That's what females are for. But sometimes you see, there are no females around.

He looked at me then, as if to see if I was really listening to him.

- Luckily, nature is well made, and some males prefer to assume the role of females. They're called faggots.

- That's just bullshit, gay people aren't just guys who want to be girls ! I told him, outraged.

Jayden seemed annoyed by my response and gave me an angry look.

- Who's the teacher here Toby? I am, so you listen to what I tell you ! he said, raising his voice.

I lowered my head, intimidated by his sudden change in tone. Unfortunately, I have the habit of correcting my teachers when they are wrong even if I know it annoys them but I can't help it.

- So it turns you that you Toby, are a faggot. And so it's your purpose to help me out, he explained.

And as to illustrate his words, he grabbed my hand again, and placed my wrist around his cock before moving it up and down his shaft. He continued to do so for a few seconds, before releasing my hand. I figured out I had to continue the deed by myself so I resumed the handjob, sliding the skin up and down his big cock, just as he had shown me. I could feel once again the warmth and hardness of his member, and it felt nice to hold it like this once again.

And as I played with his cock, I thought about what he had just told me. It seemed like a bunch of bullshit to me but at the same time I couldn't help but try to make sense of it. Maybe he was telling the truth, maybe I was to play the role of "a female" as he said and that's why I'm effeminate and gay. And so it is my duty to pleasure Jayden ? Was a little blond boy like me, barely five feet tall, really supposed to be doing such things? It's not like my little cock was going to give any pleasure to a girl anyway, so maybe it was supposed to be that way.

But as I thought about all this, I felt a hand on my neck pushing me to get closer to the cock I was holding in my hand. And shortly thereafter, I found myself with Jayden's fat cock inches from my face.

- Open your mouth, he told me in an assertive voice.

I don't know why, but I obeyed immediately. And slowly he pushed my open mouth towards his monster of a cock. I could have struggled and moved away, but I did none of that. Was it out of curiosity, submission or lust? I don't really know, but inevitably, I found myself stuffed with his hard dick inside my mouth.

- Be careful with your teeth, he said.

So I wrapped my lips over my teeth, and Jayden used the opporturnity to insert his cock deeper in my mouth, with his mushroom head sliding on my tongue. I then felt a salty liquid on it but the taste vanished quickly. His hard cock was all warm and soft which was nice, but at the same time it stretched my jaw so much that it became painful. But I had no choice but to keep my mouth wide open as I would risk hurting him if I tried to move.

- That's it, very good Toby. I'm proud of you, he told me in a calm voice.

As I said, compliments are my weakness, so I was immediately filled with inner joy. It was silly, I knew it, but I couldn't control it. And I couldn't help wanting to thank Jayden by working harder and take his cock deeper into my throat. But when I did that, I suddenly felt my gag reflex and had to withdraw and ended up coughing for a few seconds.

- It's nice that you try to take it as deep as possible, but the important thing is that you suck it good, Jayden said.

Suck. The word echoed in my head. I had heard it so many times at the playground. "Hey Toby, what's up cocksucker? », or "Hey fairy boy, when are you sucking my dick?". Kids were cruel and teenagers even worse. I understood what this word really meant when I got my first smartphone two years ago. Since then, I had seen many videos of this act and I knew how it was done.

- Wait, take off your shirt first, it will make things easier.

I didn't really understand how my shirt was a problem, but I complied anyway. And so I found myself shirtless in front of Jayden who was checking me out from top to bottom. As I don't go outside so much, I have very pale white skin and not so much muscles. But I'm not skinny either, just a normal sized boy I guess.

- Perfect, he said.

I had a hard time understanding what could please him in my childish body, but I was happy if he liked it.

- Now get to work, Jayden said as he grabbed my blonde hair.

I found myself once again with his big cock tearing my mouth. I closed my eyes to mentally review what I had seen in those videos online. The important thing was to salivate a lot, and to use the tongue. So I grabbed Jayden's cock with both hands and stuck out my tongue to lick it well while moistening it as much as I could. Then I moved my head up and down while jerking Jayden's hard cock. And I repeated these steps exactly, like a school assignment. "Drool, lick, suck, jerk off", I did these four actions then repeated again and again. I think I was doing pretty well since Jayden was moaning loudly while stroking my hair.

- Damn Toby, you suck better than a girl. You were born for that, I tell you, he said.

I didn't really think I was any better than anyone else. As with anything, you just have to learn, memorise, perform and repeat. What I hadn't imagined though was how exhausting it would be. Now, thinking about it, I'm quite sure that it was mostly related to Jayden's oversized cock and me being still a kid. But because of that, I started to lose the rhythm and I think Jayden ended up noticing it too since he eventually stopped me.

- Let's try another way, it'll be more comfortable for you, he told me.

He then took my pillows and put them against the walls on my bed. Then he grabbed me like a doll and sat me down against the wall. He undressed, first removing his t-shirt, revealing his hot muscular body, and thereafter removed his pants and his boxers, showing me his naked body in full glory.

- Enjoy the show, he told me while showing off proudly.

To be honest, I was not indifferent to all this. I envied his athletic chest and his hairy legs. And I also felt like a strong attraction, a desire to touch every inch of his skin and to kiss him, and to feel his man's body against mine. I wanted him to protect me and cherish me, like no one had ever done.

But Jayden seemed to have other things in mind. Instead, he climbed onto the bed and knelt around my legs so that his cock was level with my face. And quickly I understood why he had put me in this position. Jayden just wanted to fuck my mouth like I was some sex toy! And that's what he did, he moved forward and inserted his cock between my lips and pushed. And then began to penetrate my wide open mouth while I tried to accommodate as best I could to his enormous cock that distorted my mouth.

To my surprise, he was right, it took less effort for me in this position and he eventually managed to insert his cock deeper into my mouth than before. But it was also totally humiliating: His sweaty balls were hitting my chin, my drool was dripping uncontrollably, and his dick occasionally missed its target and hit me in the face. I hated it and I hated not having any control over the situation. At school, I could decide my pace, I could choose the exercises I wanted to do and the time I put in. Everything in my room has its place, and I have my little habits that shouldn't be broken. I'm a bit of a special boy, you see.

But now, I had no control. Jayden decided everything. He was facefucking me at the pace he wanted to, and would sometimes sink deeper into my throat when the urge came. And for some reason, my cock was hard as steel. Earlier, I had sucked him off and last week I jerked him off. I had felt satisfaction in giving him great pleasure and enjoyed seeing his gaze of desire on me. But that was it. But now I had a boner, and my dick was almost hurting me. Why was my body reacting like this when my brain was wanting him to stop? But I had lost all will, and let the man violate my mouth like some cheap whore.

One thing was sure, it was that Jayden knew what he wanted, and he was keen on expressing his pleasure without any shame. His grunts echoed through the room, coupled with the obscene sounds of his wet cock sliding between my lips. If my parents saw this, I think they would have a heart attack.

- Take that, little faggot, he said while clinging to my hair.

Although his words were insulting, there was no hate in his look. Just burning desire and pure pleasure. And I still had my hard-on, and had only one desire: to drop my pants and jerk off. But I was too ashamed to do so. Too ashamed that I was taking pleasure in his rough sexual act, but also ashamed of my small cock which would surely have made him burst out laughing ! So I did nothing. Soon enough, Jayden started to moan even more, and I saw on his face that he didn't have much longer.

- You're going to take my man juice in your face Toby, he said.

If I knew one thing, it was that after the disaster of last time, I had absolutely no desire to get his slimy sperm on my face. So when I felt that Jayden was close, I grabbed his cock and pulled it out of my mouth before guiding it to my chest. I saw right away in his eyes that he wasn't happy about it, but it was too late, and a few seconds later, a first jet of cum hit my neck.

Shit, I was not aiming correctly! I immediately lowered his dick and long ropes of his white liquid ended up on the top of my chest, including a spurt that came to flow on my nipple. I was still a little disgusted by all this but at least I had avoided the worst. Jayden collapsed immediately and came to lie down next to me on his back. I looked at his face, and saw the relief and pleasure that he just had, and I also felt relief that it was all over.

I was then really surprised when Jayden grabbed my hair and played with it, and kissed me on the forehead. This unexpected affection warmed my heart and I immediately felt overwhelmed with a strong love for him, even if a part of me still resented him for what he had just done to me again. We remained lying like this, looking into each other's eyes without saying a word. But the sight of his dried cum on my chest eventually brought me back to reality and I got up to go to the bathroom, leaving Jayden alone in my room.

I undressed and got into the shower and ran hot water over my undeveloped body. I saw the semen slowly come off and fall to the ground. But above all, I saw my little cock standing at attention, begging me to stroke it. So I got to work, and grabbed my boycock with my two fingers and jerked off. I closed my eyes, trying to imagine young handsome guys but all that came to mind was Jayden's big cock. I would see it in my hands, above my face, and on my chest. And even if I tried to chase away these thoughts, they immediately came back stronger. After only two minutes I felt a contraction and suddenly I came violently, the hot water still flowing over my body. I almost had lost balance as my vision blurred for a few seconds.

I eventually ended up coming back to my senses, and turned off the hot water. So I dried myself and got dressed and went back to the bedroom. To my surprise, Jayden had already left, leaving only a small note on my bed, saying : "See you next week my little Toby."

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