Date: Tue, 23 May 2017 16:04:51 -0400 From: Eff Del Subject: The Oak and the Ash Chapter 23 *Chapter 23* *By Eff Del* Nolitimere156@gmail.com *If you think that life is meant to be gentle and kind, you are terribly mistaken.* *Life is meant to gobble you up.* * It is meant to test you and at times tear you to pieces, but it is also meant to bind your wounds and to bring you back upon the path.* *There is no one that can protect you from life and you cannot hide from it.* *Life must be lived and if you live it properly, you will allow it to engulf you and bring you joy.* *You have to love, you have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up by life.* I disconnected the phone call and sat silently on the side of the bed thinking about the conversation I'd just had. "Dad...Dad what is it? What's the matter? Can I help?" He'd wrapped his arms around me and was staring into my eyes and his sweet face was drawn into a look of fear and concern. "Trouble at home little man. Brian's Mother has had an embolism burst and it doesn't sound good." He snuggled tighter against me and grasped my hand. "What's a `nenblueism' Dad?" "An embolism Son. Well, it's kind of like a clot or an air bubble in a blood cell. Lots of folks are born with them and yet, many people live their whole lives never even knowing that they've been carrying one. Sometimes though, the bubble rises into their brain or near their heart and it either stops the blood flow or it bursts and does serious damage...often deadly damage and that is what seems to have happened to Brian's Mother." He pulled himself into me and sighed. "Poor Brian. Me an Jack are lucky that we lost our parents when we were very little an don't remember who we lost. Brian's like you though Dad...he remembers his Mom like you remember your Father, Mother an' Kyle. I think it's better not to remember losing people. You know... like I'm still sad about losing Walter." I ran my fingers through his thick black hair and rocked slowly back and forth, as I hugged him closely and ran one hand down from his neck to the small of his back. "D-Dad, you don't think Brian will go crazy like you've told me you did when your family died? Do you." "No Sean, he has OUR family to help him and protect him. He has all of us and, I have an idea that might help him heal but first, I hope that he'll play this entire soccer season. I don't want him lose that focus. You and I were supposed to move onto another state tomorrow but now, we're going home. We'll drive out to Portland and leave the car at the airport and Captain Lucas will fly us back to Joyous Gaurde. Oh my, I've got to call Art Lyons and tell him where his car will be. Please remind me to do that when we get to Portland Sean." "Kay Dad." He nuzzled closer to me. "Do you want to sleep more or should we leave right now?" "Let's leave right now Dad. I need to be with Brian an' I think he really needs to be with you even more than with me." "OK then, don't even bother packing carefully, just throw your stuff into your case and let's get into the car." He grinned at me and said; "Think we should get some clothes on first?" He caught me so off guard that I actually thought about his question for a moment before I broke out in laughter. I pulled him closely and hugged him tightly as his smooth young skin slid against my own. I loved this boy so much that I often felt my heart would stop just from the exertion of loving him. ******* It was still dark when we reached Portland. Richard let me know that the jet was about twenty minutes away. I'd called Art Lyons to let him know where I'd left his car and suggested...more or less ordered...that he and his wife make a vacation out of retrieving it. I also told him that I'd be sending out a crew of body specialists to help him complete the restoration of his MG. The jet touched down just a bit ahead of time and we were in the air in twenty minutes. Sean made no move to enter the cockpit. He stayed behind and hugged me. I pulled out a drawer from one of the furniture-like side cabinets, grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around the both of us. I put my hand under his shirt and ran it up and down his back as he nuzzled his head against my shoulder. We both fell asleep rather quickly. Neither of us woke up during the refueling stop and we were oblivious of the second take-off. The fact is that we had to be awakened when we reached our final destination. It was Captain Lucas' face that I first saw as I thrust myself up from sleep. "Eric, the car is waiting to take you both home." "You are some pilot my friend. Neither of us even felt the landing." He smiled, not bothering to remind me that there had been two landings actually. He helped me gently wake up the boy sleeping by my side. As Sean opened his heavy lidded eyes, he smiled and said; "Hi Captain Lucas. I never got to spend time with you in the cockpit. I think I slept the whole flight." The man smiled down at him and offered his hand to raise him up. "There will be many other opportunities Sean. Now, it's time for you and your Dad to get home." "Kay Captain, but you'll fly with me soon but I'll be doin' the flying right?" The man smiled as we both raised the still groggy boy to his feet. The limo was right at the foot of the stairs and John was waiting with the door opened. Sean looked at me and I knew what his question was and I simply nodded my head. I entered the car and Sean closed the door. "John, I gedda ride up here with you. Maybe, I'll fall asleep though." Almost as soon as he said that, it was exactly what he did. His young body practically collapsed into the seat and he never budged during the short ride to the estate. Smiling at John, I unclasped the boy's seatbelt and raised him into my arms. I carried him up to his own bedroom and slowly undressed him and placed him under the blankets and sheets. I went downstairs to find out what was going on. ***************************************** Daniel greeted me and explained that Brian was at Fish Camp with Doc Swaim and Jack. "Does he know everything?" "Pretty much Eric, all of us (knowing you), didn't think you'd want him deceived or eventually taken by an unpleasant surprise. He'll be very happy to see you though. We haven't told him you were coming." "Thank you Daniel. You are an incredible bunch of guys. Sean is asleep in his room and I'm going out to Fish Camp to see Brian." He nodded his head. "I'll watch out for Sean and I'll also make certain that Martha knows that you're both home for breakfast." I smiled and walked out the back door and selected a golf cart harnessed at the charging area. The cart had headlights but I almost didn't need them. I'd made this drive so many times in my life that I felt that I could do it with my eyes closed...although of course, I never intended to try doing that. The little cabin glowed. The interior lights poured invitingly through the windows. The slight mist gathering upon the surface of the pond with the bright moon above, gave it an almost `Thomas Kinkaid' sense of quaintness...an unnatural beauty and a feeling of remote and safe welcome. Of course, wise Doc Swaim would have taken the hurting boy here... He would feel safe, protected and comfortable. My emotions were raging as I stopped the cart and stepped off. What in the hell was I going to say to this poor little boy. My sneakers crunched heavily upon the leaves and twigs as I walked slowly to the front steps and opened the door, which was (seemingly) always unlocked. The three of them were sitting huddled together off to the right and they didn't notice me as I first walked into the cabin. Jack had his arm around Brian who suddenly looked so small to me and Doc Swaim was sitting just in front of them holding the younger boy's hand and saying something so softly that I couldn't hear it well enough to understand. I stepped into the great room and said; "Brian...Brian...Son, I..." In an instant, his head was up and his eyes met mine. He was off the couch and wrapped around me with his face buried into my chest. "Dad! You came." "Of course I came sweet boy...just as soon as I heard." I guided him back to the couch and urged him to sit while I greeted the other two in the room. Jack, tall and strong was on his feet and his emerald green eyes were moist as he wrapped his arms around my neck. `My God!' I thought to myself, `He is getting near as tall as I am'. We hugged ferociously before I pushed him back and just looked at him...my red-haired wonder. What a young man he was becoming. By the grace of whatever gods may be, he was still a boy but the shadow of man-hood was strong upon him and my heart burst with love as I looked at him. "Jack, what a bastion you've been for your brother." "No Dad, I've just been a brother that's all." I smiled and nodded my head. Turning to Doc Swaim I noticed that he was offering me a drink, which I accepted. "Well Doc, it looks like I inadvertently left you a lot to handle eh?" He nodded and then with pride in his voice replied; "Nothing that family can't cope with." I almost lost it then as I remembered our conversation when I'd asked him to consider this his home and us as his family. Somehow, I managed to keep control. We all sat down and I took a sip from my single malt. "Brian, you're not a small child and I know that Doctor Swaim would never try to sugar coat a harsh reality and so, I think you know what is going on with your Mom." His eyes were bright and wet but he bravely nodded his head in the affirmative. I motioned to him to come over to me and silently and instinctively, he climbed up on my lap and curled up against me. Perhaps many people would consider he was too large for this but, I didn't give a shit...I wanted to hug and comfort my grieving boy. "Your mother is a cloistered Nun. That means under ordinary circumstances you would not be allowed to see her. However, she is currently in a public hospital and therefore you may visit her. Sadly Brian, there may not be much for you to visit. She won't be awake and even if she was, she won't recognize you. Having said that, I think it's important for you to see her and so, we'll leave in the morning. We can either fly or drive...your choice. He was silent for a long time and then he looked up at me. "Could we drive there together Dad? Could we take the Red Cat and maybe try to have a little road trip going there before ....b-before Mom...before Mom d-dies? I know she's going to die. She's pretty much dead already. Doctor Swaim has told me so." I hugged him tightly to me and said; "Of course we can Brian. That sounds like a great idea. Jack, why don't you stay here tonight and come on in with Professor Swaim for breakfast in the morning. I know that Sean will be excited to see you both." "Sounds like a plan Dad." He smiled as he gently helped Brian up to his feet. My tall bold `Spider' suddenly seemed to have become a small sad little boy and I quickly wrapped my arm around him and walked him to the door. I bid Doc and Jack a soft goodnight ensuring that I'd see them both at breakfast. Brian was slightly better by the time we'd reached the cart and we were back at Joyous Gaurde quickly and soon at the elevator and up to my bedroom. I slowly removed his clothes as Brian just stood there; limp and motionless. When he was naked, I laid him on the bed. I quickly undressed and lay down beside him and gathered him into my arms. I drew our bodies together in a tight protective hug. "I love you my little Brian. This will be sad but I promise you that your life will be happy. I PROMISE you son." He snuffled as his face was pressed against my chest. "I k-know Dad it's just that..." "We'll have lots of time to talk son. Right now, you need to sleep." He nodded his head and casually threw one long young leg over my hips as he pulled himself even tighter against me. He had adopted Sean's favorite position sleeping with me except from the other side. Almost instantly, he was breathing rhythmically and softly snoring. He was obviously emotionally exhausted. *************************** Martha's welcome for me and Sean was effusive and my little boy basked in her attention. He and Brian had experienced a private reunion and commiseration early in the morning and by the time we were seated for breakfast, the brown haired boy seemed to be in control of himself and his emotions. He actually laughed a couple of times as Sean began telling everyone about our trip. "You actually got locked up in jail Sean?" Brian's eyes were wide open and excited. "Yep. I got locked up for beating the heck out of the guy that was trying to rob me. Those self-defense lessons that we've been takin' really do come in handy Bri." "I can't wait to hear about the rest of your journey." "But not now Brian." I interjected. "We've got to get on the road. You and I have our own journey. We've got a long ride ahead of us with a sad ending I suspect." Hugs were exchanged the last being with Martha who held the boy closely and slowly stoked his back. "Be strong Brian. Your Mother is in God's hands you know." The boy nodded his head and hugged the loving woman tightly. After a few moments, he pulled away snuffling and walked over to me. "OK you guys, we'll see you when we get back." I'd informed Richard about our general plans but he understood we might diverge from the planned route. I knew there would be Skuggor on our tail but I'd gotten used to it. They were pretty much like their name; `Skuggor' meant `shadows' and that was how they were. They were hand selected for the organization and to a man, they were loyal and sedulous in the performance of their duties. We walked out to the garage and John was there. He didn't say anything instead, he took Brian in his arms and raised him up and hugged him. "Courage Brian." He finally said as he set the boy down. "Thanks John." The boy replied as I placed our small travel bags into the trunk of the little sports car. "We've just got to make one quick stop in town." I told Brian and he nodded his head in acknowledgement. ************************* Shortly, I brought the little red Jaguar to a stop in the parking lot of Struthers. Brian looked slightly confused but I just told him to wait in the car because I'd be right out. True to my word, I was back behind the wheel in less than fifteen minutes. Brian looked at me quizzically and I simply smiled at him as I reached into the bag I'd brought out from the haberdashers and displayed it to him. It was a brown Irish tweed flat cap much like the one I'd given to Sean when we took our first ride together in the `Red Cat' what seemed like a half a lifetime ago. I placed it on Brian's head and then reached back in the bag and presented him with a pair of high quality aviator- style sunglasses. Satisfied with the `look', I reached over into the glovebox and retrieved my own tweed flat cap and sunglasses. After putting them on, I smiled at Brian and said; "Now, we're ready to hit the open road with the top down and the sun on our faces." The smile he returned to me was a gift that could not be purchased for all of the gold and silver in the world. It suddenly dawned upon me that because of everything that had happened this year; this was Brian's first real ride in the `Red Cat' and certainly our first road trip together. I thought bitterly about what almost certainly lay ahead of him. Despite that, Brian was my son and I was determined to make this trip as enjoyable as possible for the boy. He'd experienced a surfeit of sadness for a kid just barely fourteen and I had decided that enough was enough. Brian was going to be happy goddamit! **************** We stopped for lunch at a little roadside restaurant; the kind of place that I enjoyed immensely. The further East we drove, the more divergent the `fast' food became. In one short day, the `road food' had morphed from predominantly TEX-MEX into barbeque and my boy and I were happily diving into plates of ribs, corn on the Cobb and tasty beans cooked in a sweet brown sauce. Brian raised his head up and grinned; his chin was slick with sauce and butter from the corn. "We need a place like this back in town Dad! This is so good." I smiled and said; "I'll remind you of that the next time we have lunch at Alfredo's." He blushed and grinned at the same time. "Yeah I know, but you have to admit this is good." I reached over the table and stroked his cheek. "Yeah, I DO have to admit this is good." Now, let's talk Brian. Your Mother may already be dead or she'll likely die while we are on the road...you know this. It's a fact so let's not hide from it. We're going to pay last respects. There is nothing we can do; no miracle you can produce that will change the end of this drive. It will end with your Mother's peaceful death and if she's right, her delivery into the arms of her God. I don't share her belief but that doesn't make her wrong and me right. We will all find out eventually that's a certainty Brian. Since time is not really a constraint, how would you feel about spending the night just about twenty miles ahead of us? The motel will be rather cheap by our standards but it will be clean and the bed will be comfortable. Nearby, there is a genuine ghost town. We can explore it this afternoon. Then, we'll get up early in the morning and make it to your Mother's hospital by late afternoon tomorrow." "Sounds great Dad." He smiled as he said it and I smiled back. ****************** There was nothing special about the `Rorrytown Inn' except for its prime proximity to `Rorrytown' itself. That was the name of the ghost town just down the road. The motel certainly wasn't sleazy. It was freshly painted and seemingly well maintained. When all was said and done however, it was simply a motel quite unlike the four-star hotels that I was used to. After checking in, Brian and I changed into light clothing and headed for the Ghost Town. It turned out that the ghost town; `Rorrytown' was genuine. There had been a small gold strike in the hills and soon a bustling little town had grown up around the meager claims. It lasted less than three years but local residents have worked to preserve the town for historical purposes. It was a minor but modestly successful tourist attraction. Beside the restored buildings, there were volunteer re-enactors portraying everything from shopkeepers to blacksmiths and gunslingers. These latter staged mock gunfights on the main street every half an hour. I was going to explain to Brian that these were historically not accurate. There is not one iota of evidence that the classic movie/tv showdown we'd grown up with ever occurred in the old west. True shooting confrontations were actually events that took place when the combatants already confronted each other drawn, cocked and ready...not a fast draw in the bunch. I changed my mind when I realized that Brian was enjoying the spectacle too much for me to want to spoil it just for the sake of historical veracity. We enjoyed the entire visit and laughed together as we explored the little village. The entire presentation was quite well done. The buildings were well maintained and the working staff were cheerful, helpful and quite good at their respective roles in depicting what life might have been like in the little town over a hundred years ago. We walked back to the car through the laughable `Boot Hill' cemetery getting a great kick out of some of the epitaphs written on the wooden grave markers. Brian wrapped his arm around me. "Thanks Dad." He almost mumbled. "For what Brian?" "For loving me." "Brian, I've loved you from the first time I met you. Thanks for agreeing to become my son." "I'm so...so...so sad and happy at the same time." He sniffled and tried to hide his tears. "Brian, you and your brothers mean everything to me. You have tears ahead of you but you also have a happy life with family and friends. Be strong." ************************************* Just down the road from our motel was a steak house that looked to be quite popular and after only a short discussion, we took its popularity to be a recommendation and decided to have our dinner there. It turned out that we were not disappointed; the steaks were big, juicy and seared and grilled perfectly. I wasn't able to sneak Brian a beer or a glass of wine because there were too many people in the restaurant. That didn't seem to bother him because he knew there was a cold beer waiting in our cooler back in our room. ******************************* We were lying side by side on the big bed in our motel room. I was drinking a glass of Glen Fiddich and Brian was enjoying a bottle of `Tucker Brothers Pale Ale' that I'd packed before we left Joyous Gaurde. We were both naked and content. As soon as we'd returned to the room, he had insisted that I make love to him. We undressed swiftly and I took him into my arms pressing my lips against his. Soon we were sharing a frenzy of love and passion. I'd initially intended to take him slowly and gently but our shared ardor predestined a rougher more physical coupling. I have no idea how long we moved against each other fervently... joined together in that special way while our hands and lips enthusiastically exploring the other's body. Brian's release came first and he moaned with pleasure as he sprayed his young juices onto his chest and belly. I exploded inside him just a few moments later and we cuddled with each other tightly, breathing heavily. Eventually, we returned to normal respiration and we propped ourselves up on our pillows. I rose up from the bed, got him his beer and then made my drink. We were smiling at each other and sharing funny recollections of our trip so far. ************************ The light just barely coming through the window awakened me. I hadn't closed the curtains or the blinds and so, when I looked out, I was greeted by the sight of a blazing white ball right in the middle of an orange band that separated a grey sky and a purple horizon. I shook his shoulder and once he began to stir, I spoke loudly to him; "Up you get Brian, shower time and we'll grab breakfast along the road." "OK Dad." He half yawned as he rolled off the bed. His young body was magnificent and I had to retrain myself from pulling him back down upon the mattress. "That shower isn't big enough for both of us, so you go first son." Rubbing his sleepy eyes, he walked into the bathroom and soon I heard the shower running. Shortly, the beautiful boy emerged from the bathroom; his body glistening with moisture from the shower as he worked the towel against his skin. "Mighty little shower Dad, but it's your turn." He was smiling as he toweled his hair. I was looking at his body; shining with the remaining dampness on his skin and wished that we didn't need to be on the road so early. Despite the temptation, I entered the shower and soon was out, dry and dressed. We stepped into the already warm air. I lowered the top on the red car and we were back on the road. Brian was chatty today. I suspected that he was trying to forget what was certainly lying ahead of him. I let him chatter on and replied when it was relevant. About two thirty, we pulled into the parking lot of the regional hospital and walked to the reception desk. "Would you tell us what room Maria Williams is in?" The elderly woman scanned her screen frowning at her lack of success. I quickly interjected; "Perhaps she's here under the name of Sister Maria." "Oh yes, Sister Maria...from the Cloister. She's in room four twenty two. That's on the fourth floor of course and the elevators are just down that corridor to your right. When we reached the fourth floor, a large Hispanic nurse asked us what we were here for and I explained that Brian was here to see his mother before she passed. "Sir, I'm sorry but there must be some mistake. The patient in room 422 is a Catholic Nun." I nodded my head and smiled ever so slightly. "I know that and I also understand that this is very unusual but I assure you that she is Brian's mother. It's a long and complicated story, but perhaps these papers will make it a bit clearer." I handed her the packed of documents that I'd brought with me. She perused them for a few minutes and then looked up at me with a sad smile. Glancing down at Brian she said; "Brian, you understand that your mother's condition is very grave. It's a miracle that she has lasted this long." He raised his face with a grim smile of determination. "She's lasted this long because she's waiting for me. God could have taken her anytime he wanted but they're holding off until I get to kiss her and take her hand. God will have her forever but I'm being allowed a short time first. Can I see her now?" "Of course Honey, follow me." As we walked down the corridor, I felt my eyes flood with tears. What Brian just said had shocked and stunned me to the point that I felt unworthy to be walking to his Mother's room with him. Maria was lying in the hospital bed semi-propped up. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was open as she breathed rapidly. It was as if her body was desperately trying to save itself even though it knew it was a losing battle. She looked so much smaller than the last time I'd seen her. I has been my experience that when in repose, dead and dying people seem to shrink in upon themselves making their earthly burden smaller and lighter. If I were a truly spiritual man, I think I'd attribute this to the exit of the soul or spirit that is the actual life force of the individual. I am sadly either too young or too jaded despite the several questionable contacts with my dead family and Walter, to believe. Maria, literally brain dead lying on the bed had far more faith than I did and now I realized; so did Brian. He walked over and kissed the limp body on the bed and then grasped her hand. "I'm here Mom. You can go when you're ready. You made sure that I was safe and loved and I'll always adore you for that. You were the best Mom ever and I love you." Seconds later, Maria's breathing stopped and the machine monitoring her vital signs flat lined. After a few minutes of checking, the nurse wrapped her arms around Brian and told him what he already knew; "Your Mother is gone Honey. I'm so sorry." He shook his tear streaked face and said to no one in particular; "She squeezed my hand! I swear to you that she squeezed my hand. She knew I was there and she waited for me." ************************* We checked into the nearest and best hotel and I quickly gave him a beer which he drank almost instantly. "So, do you realize that now we are a family of orphans?" I thought about that for a moment and then replied; "Perhaps technically because none of us have our original parents but, you and your brothers have me as a parent. You have two loving brothers and we have a wonderful family. How can you be an orphan when you have all that?" Tears were streaming from his eyes. "What if this had happened when it was just me and Mom? What would have happened then?" "But it didn't happen that way Brian. That's got to be for a reason. Now, the restaurant in this hotel looks decent. Go wash your face and let's have dinner." Brian smiled and walked into the bathroom. He returned several minutes later looking much better. As we were eating dinner, I shared a few thoughts with him; "Your Mother will be interned tomorrow but we will not be allowed to participate. This will be a Nun's funeral. We will be able to visit her grave next year and we will Brian. I truly want you to play goalie this season and do your best. When the season is over, I think that I'd like for you to spend about four weeks out on the ranch with Pete and of course Paulie and Howie. You'll learn to ride and perhaps many other things...Pete is a great teacher. The thing is Brian, it will clear your head and heal your heart." "Thanks Dad. I really do want to play the soccer season just to show them that I'm the best but, time on the ranch sounds great. I love Paulie and Howie almost like they were brothers. So now, instead of desert, what about we go upstairs and you make love to me?" I smiled and offered him a hand to raise him up from his chair.