Date: Sun, 13 Jun 2021 09:54:36 +0000
From: Onatangent <onatangent@protonmail.com>
Subject: Four Interviews with Old Subs

Four Interviews with Old Subs

(gay/authoritarian)


(other stories by me can be found by searching Nifty for the same email
as this one's under)

All the other students from my journalism cohort were dripping with
jealousy. Just graduated and already a salaried position with Dash
Weekly. This wasn't just any job. Freedom to cover what I wanted. Freedom
to spend ages on research and whatever I needed to go really in depth. As
long as what I produced ended up drawing eyeballs.

The first project I picked was almost a flex. Just because I could. None
of the students with CNN internships were going to get to write about
BDSM. But I could.

It seemed to have gotten so much more common. You could buy 50 Shades of
Grey in an airport. But it hadn't always been like that. Talking to
people who had done it for a long time... There was something to that.
Plus, articles about sex sell.

I had no idea where to even look. But I started hunting. I found an old
school message board. People into long-term full-time dom/sub
relationships. Extreme enough to shock people, I figured, but not so
extreme as to scare them.

I posted a thread. A few of them replied. Doms who said they'd instruct
their subs to talk to me. I had no idea where it was about to take me.

NAME: Bruce
AGE: 62
OWNER: Adrian

"We both grew up in the same small town. Conservative little place.
Adrian was a bit more worldly than me, so when he said it I just believed
it."

Bruce was a slight man, dressed in slacks and a sweater vest. Thin wire
rim glasses and a circle of baldness in the middle of his short hair. He
also wore an apron. He had brought me tea when I came in, pulled out my
chair, and for himself sat on a little stool close to the ground.

"When he said what?"

Bruce giggled. "Well, we'd been stealing away with each other a while at
that point, hiding in the fields or what have you. He took a trip to the
city. When he came back, he told me that in the city men like us could be
in relationships just like a man and a woman."

"You'd never considered that before?"

"Not really. Or at least I didn't know what it would look like. But he
had the answer. Said that all the queer relationships had to have a
leader and a follower. The leader calls all the shots and the follower
obeys."

"And you believed it?"

"I mean, that was how I was brought up to think marriage was supposed to
work. Man in charge, woman obeys. So it made perfect sense. Not to
mention we'd definitely be moving to the city if we tried it."

"Did you like the idea, or just want to be with him and figure this was
the only way?"

"The thought of being the woman in the relationship was quite exciting,
plus getting to be together, and in the city."

"You like being feminine?"

"Only sexually. I'm a man with clothes on, but a lady naked, if you know
what I mean."

I wasn't entirely sure I did but I got the gist. "So how did it go moving
to the city?"

"It was a real rush. Being out, back then, in the neighborhood. Very
freeing. Adrian was having a hell of a time too. And we were feeling out
our relationship. It was very much more intense than I was expecting."

"More intense?"

"Oh, yes. I'd been expecting, like I said, the level of womanly
submission I'd grown up around. Like, he expects dinner and has the last
word on big decisions. But he very quickly established himself as having
control over most of my life."

"How so?"

"Every decision was his to make. He would tell me how to do things I
already knew. Everything he said to me was an order, not a request."

"And this without establishing the rules with your consent."

"Yes, well, it was a different time, and we didn't know much. He didn't
have the vocabulary."

I decided not to respond to that.

"Anyway, what solidified it for me was when I made some sassy remark and
he grabbed my wrist and gave me two solid spanks
right there on the sidewalk. That's when I realized he didn't see us as
equals. Also around then I realized that not every gay couple was like
us. In fact, most weren't."

"That must have been a problem."

"Well, yes, it was at first. But as it went on I realized he was never
cruel. Just controlling. Like I was his pet or something. And thinking
about it that way made me feel... Excited, more than anything. I liked
it. I decided to start calling him Sir. He loved it so much he stripped
and fucked me then and there."

"Easy as that? You just loved it?"

"Well, we did have a talk soon after that. And we realized we were both
on board. So we dropped the idea that we were in some sort of marriage.
Marriages are more equal than that. I became his pet and houseboy. That
was forty years ago."

"And you're still together."

"That's right. He'll be home in an hour and I'll be be ready with his
beer and I'll probably give him a blowjob, if he wants one."

"What's life like as a pet?"

"I'm taken care of, I keep the house, you know. I follow orders - the
last time I disobeyed Sir was twenty years ago, by accident. I've never
been spanked so hard. I spend my life improving his."

He smiled warmly. In any other situation I'd clock the guy as Mr
Rogers-esque. But that definitely didn't fit what I'd heard.

"So that's all? It sort of sounds like you're a regular housewife, just a
really docile and submissive one."

"I suppose that's the day to day, yes. But also remember, Sir has had
forty years of getting to try out every whim with a willing partner. I've
done quite a lot in my day. Of course, we're older now, all that's left
is the group."

"The group?"

"We have a few couple friends we've known for years from the
neighborhood. Once a month they come for dinner and games. I fix them
dinner, then spend the evening in a rubber suit, tied up in a corner. Any
time someone feels like it they can come over to use me. "

I swallow hard. He smirks just a bit, having gotten a rise, but doesn't
let too much on.

"Sir told me specifically to tell you that part. He also said that if you
want to masturbate before you leave, I should ask if I can film it. He
has a collection."

I swallowed hard and politely declined.

NAME: Darryl
AGE: 58
OWNER: Edward

Darryl sat in front of me nearly naked, save for a barely-together pair
of briefs with a few shreds in them. He looked strong, like he spent a
fair amount of time working out. That was accompanied by a taut gut
sticking out over his briefs. Over his exposed body I couldn't help but
notice a few random scratches and bruises all over.

"Ed and I met in the late 80s. Some leather bar downtown. It's gone
now."

"You were into leather?"

"We still are. There's a trunk in the upstairs closet with plenty of
stuff."

"At the moment you're a bit more stripped down."

Darryl chuckled "Yeah, Ed won't let me near the clothes today."

"Won't let you?"

"Yeah, I tried to go for the closet but he stopped me. Gave me this when
I reminded him about the interview." he pointed to a bruise on his arm.

"He hit you?"

"He asserted his will over me. I could have fought back. But I wasn't
ready to fight today. He was the superior man and so was able to make me
do what he wanted."

"Is it always like this?"

He grinned and nodded. "Has been for ages. At the start we were just,
y'know, dating normal or whatever. We did the leather clubs but just a
regular couple."

"What changed?"

"Just some sex games at first. I thought it might be a fun idea if we
wrestled to try to top the other, so we did. I won that night." his
briefs twitched. "But it was fun. We kept going. Soon it was the only way
we did it. Sex would usually start with a headlock."

"Sounds like it started out equal."

"It was! And a lot of fuckin fun, too. So we expanded it to other stuff.
Basically fair game to get the other one to do whatever you wanted if you
could force them to do it."

"That's a lot of fighting."

"Tussling, sure. Once got a nasty cut on my arm in a brawl over who would
clean the kitchen." he pointed to the dulled scar.

"That still doesn't sound like a submission thing - Ed said in his
message that you were his slave."

"Well I'm fucking getting to that aren't I?" he looked me up and down. He
definitely would have won if he'd tried to 'tussle' with me.

He continued "This goes on a few years. We make it the official rule of
our relationship - between us, might makes right. And we stuck with it.
No dirty tricks, just honorable true strength. Felt real. Felt right."

He paused. I'd normally interject but not after last time.

"We got as married as we could get in the early 90s. Wedding with the
family who would talk to us. Had a party afterwards with our friends into
the same sort of stuff, maybe not as serious as we were. There was a
naked mud pit. Eight guys brawlin', fucking whoever they could pin. Won
two that night and lost one. Also lost a tooth. Great time." he chuckled
and smiled. One of his front teeth was a different color than the
others.

"That must have been a great time." I sheepishly came back in.

"Of course it was. Anyway, a few years go by, and Ed starts hitting the
gym real hard. We both go all the time, but he really picked it up. Said
he wanted to be stronger than me. I went a little harder too, but he was
a real fiend. I figured it might tip the scales a little but I didn't
realize how much."

I scribbled some notes.

"I realized things had changed one night when I pinned him on the living
room floor, knees to chest, and had just buried my cock in him. Very weak
position I've got him in, you can imagine. All of the sudden he bucks me
out of him and off, and turns me over. Gets me on all fours, which should
be much easier to break, but I can't fuckin move. Seconds later he's
inside me and I can just feel those goddamn arms on me and somehow I
can't move. Every time I move he just holds me in place. Never had a
reversal quite like that."

My heart was pounding. I could imagine the scene. I was probably in the
same living room right then, doing the interview." Where in the room was
it?"

He pointed to a corner. "Still his favorite spot to fuck."

"So after that he had the upper hand."

"Oh yeah he did. It wasn't so much at first. He'd win most fights but I
still got in a few. I went harder at the gym but I couldn't keep up with
him. He just went even harder. From then I'd have to catch him by
surprise to win."

"How long did that go on?"

"A few years. By the late 90s I barely had a chance. I managed to get the
remote away from him to choose the channel on new year's for the new
millennium. Then that was it. That was twenty years ago. Haven't won a
fight since."

"You haven't gotten your way in your marriage in twenty years?"

"Not once, at least not if it was something that he wanted different."

"But you still try - you said that when you went for clothes you thought
about fighting it."

"Oh I put up a brawl good. I'm no eager little sub who just wants to be
controlled. I have my own fuckin opinions. But I can't win a fight, I
don't get to have it my way. That's the rule. Plus, wouldn't be any fun
if he just got to have his way without having to earn it."

"You said you used to top... None of that in twenty years either?"

"Oh I get to top. Sometimes we'll get some guy in and both fuck him. And
sometimes Ed just wants to be plowed. So it happens plenty, just whenever
he wants it to. Says my ass looks its best when I fuck. So I just gotta
wait until he wants to see that. If I jump the gun and top without his
say so I get three gut punches."

"That sounds like an arrangement that makes sense for you. Still...
You're effectively the sub here, a complete submissive, in this
relationship for a long time. Twenty years is a long time to have no say
for someone who doesn't claim to be very submissive. Why do you go along
with it? Surely you have to agree to stay in this situation to some
degree, or is he forcing you to do that too?"

He grinned. "I don't think you understand. The desire to get to have my
way or control my own life is nothing compared to the rush I get when the
superior man gets his way. That's when justice is served, that's when the
world makes sense. If I never get a say because I'm the inferior man, so
be it. I would never want autonomy if I couldn't earn it."

" So you think you're inferior?"

"I don't need to think it. He's proven it again and again."

After I'd left, heading down the front steps, I heard a crash of a couch
tipping over. Maybe they were choosing who would make dinner. I wondered
what Darryl would make.

NAME: James
AGE: 49
OWNER: Hector

James was a small man, and carried himself smaller than that. I kept
having to adjust my gaze upwards to talk to him, as though I kept
expecting him to be shorter.

"So how did you meet?"

He cleared his throat and readied himself, prepared and calm.

"I was just getting started with gay life. Going out on the town with a
few friends. Mid nineties. I hadn't been out there long. I ran into him
my second weekend at the bars."

"And what did you think then?"

"Oh I was smitten instantly. Here was this big strong bear of a man. A
few years older than me. Nice suit, good haircut. And he seemed
interested in me too."

"An instant match, it sounds like."

"Absolutely. We got to talking, and it came up that I was only getting
started. He asked if I was a virgin and I said yes. He looked at me like
he'd already known."

"Were you surprised that's how the conversation went?"

"I mean, I'd been in high school locker rooms. I knew how they talked
about virginity. For girls at least. So it wasn't too much of a shock to
meet a man interested in mine. I assumed he wanted to take it, though."

"But he didn't."

James shook his head and crossed his legs. "Oh, no. He told me that he
had a fantasy of taking a virgin man as his servant, and then keeping him
a virgin."

"Keeping him a virgin? For how long?"

"That didn't come up. Immediately. Well, I agreed to go along with it."

"You agreed? Really? I mean... Just old enough to hit the bars, never had
sex, weren't you just desperate for your first time?"

He shrugged "I'd never had the hottest libido anyway. I figured I could
go a little longer without. Besides, he was just such a wonderful
masculine presence... And being a servant to a man like that was really
the only fantasy I had."

"So... Just like that. After, what, half an hour talking to him?"

"I doubt there are a lot of guys who would go along with it. But Sir has
always been a good judge of character. Even then he told me I was maybe
the twentieth person he'd asked about it. You get lucky eventually."

I thought for a moment of whether to keep believing this. It just seemed
so impossible. But here he was. One in a million happens, I suppose.

"You agreed... What then?"

"He gathered up another young man he'd been talking to and we all went
back to his place. I took their coats and helped them undress, and then
they headed to the bedroom for sex. He told me not to masturbate, and to
come in and check on them regularly to see if they needed anything."

"That seems like it would be very awkward."

"It might have been, but I fell into the role easily. I acted like it was
my job to be there, and his boytoy didn't seem to mind it. I fetched the
drinks and cigars after - Sir hadn't quit yet - and helped clean them
up."

"What did you think after it was all done? Did you leave then?"

"I felt like I'd been very helpful, and I'd really enjoyed watching Sir
in action. The man he'd been with really seemed to enjoy it. I did think
I was going to leave, but then Sir said I could stay if I wanted. He
offered me a bed in the servant room, but only if I kept not
masturbating, cleaned the living room before bed, and prepared breakfast
in the morning."

"So you stayed."

"I didn't want to leave the job undone. I got that first hit of servitude
and liked it. A lot. Not masturbating was hard given what I'd seen, but I
managed it. And in the morning he had a clean living room and breakfast
on the table. I stood to his side as he ate and fetched coffee and juice.
After he was done I fixed myself something. While I ate, he told me I
could stay the week. He was off work, would be bringing a lot of guys
home, and could use the service."

"So you stayed the whole week that first time?"

"It's hard to describe just how natural it felt. Like that's where I was
supposed to be. So I stayed, helping to prepare and clean his conquests,
and doing whatever Sir asked. A week felt like nothing. I almost forgot
to call my roommate to tell him where I was."

"But after the week was up he'd need to head back to work, right?"

"Yes, but the week had gone so well. He knew he'd found the right
servant. I loved serving him. I loved doing it all, and never questioned
it for a moment. He could see how I loved disappearing into my duties,
how automatic it was."

"Which leads us to the long term relationship. How did it get there?"

"Sir is always very direct. He sat me down the day before he had to go
back to work and offered me a permanent position in his household. He is
reasonably well off and could support me. He said that he would narrow my
life to just what I needed. I would be giving up my freedom, my
independence, and my sexuality."

"That seems like an enormous ask. Even if you're submissive. After a
week?"

"It wasn't a hard decision for me. It was the most natural thing. I
didn't even have to think about it."

I paused for a moment to take it all in, and jot down some notes. James
did seem a bit strange, and he clearly had no ambiguity in what he
wanted. Maybe it really was that easy for him.

"So you agreed. And then... That's it? Completely sexually servile, and
living sort of as a maid?"

"More of a butler. And no, you don't get it. He didn't keep me to use
sexually. He wanted me kept a virgin."

"Not even to serve him? Blowjobs?"

"No, not even once. I've never given nor received a single sexual touch
from anyone. No jobs of any kind. No kink either, outside of, well, the
whole arrangement I suppose."

My jaw was about at the floor.

"For decades? Not even touching yourself? No toys? Why?"

"Because that's not my purpose. He said not to so I didn't. I mean, I
masturbated as a teenager but never since I met Sir. Like he promised, he
took my sexuality from me."

"How do you manage that... How does that even work?"

"The first few years were difficult. I was hard all the time, which was
very discouraged around guests, since if they asked me to join in Sir
would have to say no to them. But I just focused on my work. I've found
cleaning helps me ignore any urges. I can focus on my tasks like a drone.
Managed to limit any activity to wet dreams - can't really avoid those.
"

"A few years, some discipline, sure. But decades?"

"Well, then shops started carrying good chastity devices. Took a while to
find a good one, but once I got cozy it was a real relief. I've been
wearing it except to get cleaned for twenty years now. And Sir brings in
a specialist to clean me without any accidents. I haven't touched myself,
sexually or otherwise, that whole time."

"Aren't you even curious what you're missing out on?"

"Everyone is missing out on something. You'll never know what it's like
to live like me. Aren't you curious what you're missing out on?"

"And it will just keep being like this."

"Yes. My life is monotonous and repetitive. I love it. I don't want
anything different. Sometimes things just all fit perfectly. I will die a
virgin servant."

That seemed like a fitting end to the conversation. I thanked him and
left. I made plans to masturbate as soon as I got back to the hotel.
Partially just to check that I still could.

NAMES: Corea and Bird
AGES: 71 and 72
OWNER: Great Tempest

"Well, it *was* the sixties." Corea and Bird looked at each other and
smiled.

"Yes," I said, "but that doesn't explain it, does it? I associate the
sixties with plenty of things but not really BDSM."

"It was less a part of the story but it was there." Bird said.

"We'd been hanging around the right cafes. You go to enough readings and
people knew what you were into."

"So you met Great Tempest there?"

"Yes. He shared His novel with us and told us what He was doing. A sort
of experiment. He had a farm upstate and was recruiting members. Everyone
would treat Him as a God and He would run their lives."

"That's very direct."

"Breaking false narratives was the concept of the time. He was always
very direct with us."

"And, wait, treat him as a God?"

"He is one, so seems appropriate don't you think?"

"Great Tempest is a God."

"That's what we agreed to when we went."

"O... kay. The two of you clearly went to the farm then."

"Not the two of us exactly. We didn't really know each other yet. But we
did both go there. There were eight of us at the time, plus Great
Tempest."

"What did you do there?"

"We were naked the whole time. We worked the land and grew food. We
worshipped Great Tempest and served God's needs. This included sexual
needs, of course. The day's hardest worker would rest the next day and
share His bed that night."

"And he controlled everything."

"Yes. We were all there for Him and to worship, serve, and be controlled
by Him."

I paused and must have made a face because Corea interrupted. "You're
thinking this sounds like a cult."

I shrugged. "It sort of does."

"Well that's exactly what it was." they both nodded. "He said as much
when He invited us. He had bought the farm and declared Himself God so He
could use people for His own gratification. We had no notion that we were
going there for any other reason than His glorification. We weren't there
for ourselves, except to the extent we wanted to be used and
controlled."

"So do you actually think Great Tempest is... God?"

"Yes, of course."

"Even though, by your own words, it's a cult he made up?"

"I don't think you get it."

They seemed a little miffed at that. I changed the subject. "So you
worked the farm, and participated in everything. Did you enjoy
yourselves?"

"Oh very much" said Bird. "He was the best dominant any of us had seen.
And having to compete to even have a chance of pleasing Him only made us
more servile and submissive."

Corea piped up "I never understood why people enjoyed sex until I was the
best worker of the day. He fucked me in a bed of straw and left me with
an ass covered in welts and dripping with his juices."

"He tells that story a lot" chuckled Bird.

I blushed and cleared my throat. "Did you find yourselves getting closer
to Great Tempest?"

"Oh all eight of us did. We would make him collective gifts to show our
appreciation. Long to serve him more. We gave it all we had and gladly."

"But you're not there any more. What happened to the farm?"

"After five years we'd grown to sixteen, and still loving all of it. But
Great Tempest had been seeing what needed to change. The farm wouldn't be
forever, and it was the seventies then."

"So what happened?"

"He arranged a way to become even more of a God for us by splitting us
up. He arranged each of us a soul mate bond with one of the others.
That's how Bird and I got together."

"He just... Assigned you two to be together?"

"Oh yes. I mean, he knew we enjoyed each other. When the workers weren't
with Him the non winners enjoyed each other. Everyone tried everyone else
but had their preferences, of course. If you made particularly close love
with someone, word would get around and He would ask you to perform for
everyone. If the sight made Him hard that meant that your orgasms were
blessed. "

"You didn't mention that part earlier."

"We lived there many years. I left out a lot."

I nodded. "So, uhm, you two ended up assigned together."

"Oh right, yes. He told us to go off and join American Suburbia, turn it
upside down with our queer sex."

"Sounds revolutionary in its tone"

"Oh it was. Not everyone got assigned that way, but He told us we could
make a difference. So we became as normal as we could."

"Normal?"

"We got jobs, we bought a suburban house. Had a wedding ceremony."

"All because he told you to? What did he do at the wedding?"

"You do whatever God tells you to do when you know it, don't you? And He
wasn't at the wedding, he was long gone by then."

"He didn't attend?"

"He was there in spirit."

Mmm-hmm. "And you're still together... Does he still control you?"

"Oh yes. He comes by every few years to grace us with His presence and
direct our lives. The gaps have gotten longer. I believe he has taken on
more worshippers that he must attend to but we don't ask." said Corea.

Bird nodded. "And He graced us with a wonderful life. He had us adopt
kids - both grown now. We had successful careers. And never once have we
disobeyed or strayed from Him."

"You had kids because he told you to?"

"We didn't think it would be possible but He knew."

"Did they know your arrangement?"

"Oh no, of course not. They knew an Uncle Tempest who came by
occasionally and who we'd get a sitter when He did."

"How else has he directed your lives?"

"Oh, plenty of ways," said Bird. "We ask Him for guidance on whatever
major problems we have when He is with us."

"Oh it's a reporter Hon, he wants to know the sexy bits."

I blushed. I did.

Bird laughed. "When He visits us we serve Him, of course. His cock really
is delicious. And He sets the terms of our sexual relationship until His
next visit."

Corea nodded. "For now, I'm on top, and we're training Bird to cum from
nipple stimulation."

"Almost there." he smiled

"We're also to be learning about puppy leather. Bird has a pup suit that
he spends weekends in."

"On all fours, leash and collar. I wasn't sure at first, but as usual, He
knows best. He wants me associating tittilation with it, and so I am in
chastity whenever I'm not in my suit." they smiled.

"He's always loved manipulating Bird in particular. Bird's body is His
canvas. Every tattoo on there was ordered by Him. And he loves seeing
Bird change between visits. He's had Bird get fat..."

"Spent the nineties fat. Apparently a turnon for Corea here."

Corea chuckled. "It was! Of course, you're wonderful now too. He had Bird
lose weight. We're not thin now, you can tell, but come on, we're old.
You put on a few pounds."

Bird laughed. "He had me hairless a while. Pierced a while. Training my
ass for large insertions a while... I could go on."

"This sounds much more out there, or at least much more modern, than
group sex on a farm."

"He changes with the times. And He also recognizes the mortality of His
current vessel. So all of his couples, He's told us, are being trained
with one dominant and one submissive. When His body passes, He will
inhabit the dominant and use the submissive for His will. He wants
variety these days, so He is training us all differently."

"I'd ask how you like the idea of being dominant, but I'd guess you'd
tell me that it won't be you, it will be him."

Corea smiled. "You're understanding better now."

EPILOGUE

Dash published the article and pushed it hard, to great success. Sure,
the comments were a mix of interest in the subjects, appreciation for the
reporting, and a childish mockery of BDSM, but that's par for the course.
And with millions of views, I'll take it.

But, to be honest, it wasn't really ever about my classmates. Sure, I
loved having a successful article that seemed to be leading to more. But
really it was about who I was looking at.

I was strapped in, laying flat, rubber surrounding my body. I had no room
to move, just looking up, only my head exposed. The cock milker made its
mechanical sounds and I groaned, squirming as I could as I came a third
time, already sore.

Above me, watching, was Trevor. Looking down at me and grinning. Rubber
head to toe himself. My boyfriend.

I whimpered for the milker to stop as it took me even farther. He smacked
my stomach and watched me squirm.

I'd broached the possibility of going farther with him. We'd met in a
leather club-the story wasn't unique. We'd been together two years now.
He indulged every submissive fantasy I had without even asking about them
because they lined up perfectly with how he wanted to dominate me.

But when I mentioned being more permanent together, he'd declined. He
wanted full time. He only wanted to be with someone long term if he could
own them, in and out of the bedroom. Run their lives, be in charge fully,
be the unquestioned voice in charge in his house. And I didn't want that.
I'd said as much.

But after the article, I'd thought a long time. I saw what life was like
for them, who they were and how long they'd done it. And there on that
table I knew I could see myself in them.

I looked at him, grateful my mouth wasn't gagged. I bit my lip.

"Will you marry me?"

He looked back at me. The rubber face twisted and I could tell he was
smiling. He leaned over and whispered in my ear "Yes you piece of shit."
He smacked my balls and I came a fourth time, moaning in agony.