Date: Thu, 28 Sep 2006 19:05:43 -0700 (PDT) From: MASTER bndmaster13 Subject: "I Had No Idea" - Part 18 "I Had No Idea" - Part 18 BY - BNDMaster13@yahoo.com All rights reserved. Other than downloading one copy for personal enjoyment, no part of this story may be reproduced or transmitted by any means, except for reviews, without the written permission of the author. Comments on the story are appreciated and may be addressed to the author, BNDMaster13@yahoo.com. This story contains descriptions of consensual sexual contact between adult males. As such it is homoerotic, designed for the entertainment of mature adults. If you are not of legal age to read such material, or if the subject matter would create unresolvable personal moral dilemmas, please exit now. I have had several interesting comments on Alex's last journal entry. Several people have actually been worried that I am being to hard on Alex. Let's get real here, shall we. I have been with Alex for a long time. I know him better than he knows himself. Also I had no intention of actually leaving him chained in the middle of the room for five months. Good lord, where would be my fun in that? Remember, I enjoy playing with Alex. I get off on torturing him, yes he gets off on it too, but that not the point. I get off on it! But more importantly, believe it or not, I actually love him, despite what some of you may think. This whole thing is simply to teach Alex a lesson. To see if I can develop a new aspect of his mentality toward being my slave. What is that lesson and why do I think it is so important? Well hopefully this entry in Alex's journal will explain it. As you remember we left off Friday morning. Alex had been chained up for six days and he was beginning to actually get off on it. He was also beginning to let the situation get to him. I could see it in his eyes. He might tell you that I never even look at him. But be assured I did. I have to see his eyes as well as his body language in order to gauge how he is responding. Considering the fact that I have his mouth gagged he can't tell me himself. To pick up our account we are going to start with the next morning, Saturday. That Friday night I took Jose to bed with me and for the first time Alex was alone all night. Usually, even though he couldn't talk to him, he at least had Jose's bound presence in the room to keep him company. Let me turn this account over to Alex and let him tell you about what happens that Saturday morning: The only way I can possibly begin this is by saying that Friday night was one of the worst nights of my life. Rick was still ignoring me. I was still chained in the middle of the room, I was still gagged, my cock was still imprisoned in it's cage, and the worst part was that Rick took Jose to bed with him. He took Jose to bed with him and left me chained here by myself in the middle of the room without even a blanket! All I could do was lay there on the hard floor all alone, imagining Jose cuddled up to Rick in a nice warm bed. Imagining Jose getting to suck Rick's wonderfully delicious cock. Knowing Jose was getting to snuggle into Rick's side and fall asleep with Rick's arm around him. I really didn't think I would even be able to sleep with the tears that were streaming down my cheeks, but eventually I must have, because the next thing I knew the sun was streaming in the windows and I heard the sound of Jose in the kitchen fixing Rick's coffee. I didn't even bother to try and get up. I just lay there wondering how long I was going to be able to endure this. It had only been a week and I was already losing it. There was no way I could endure this treatment for the entire five months. At that time I had no idea what Rick's plan actually was and that thankfully I wouldn't have to. But as I said that Saturday morning I didn't have any idea what the weekend would hold. When Rick finally got up the morning proceeded as every other morning for the last week had. Jose cleaned me and Jose feed me. When I was done eating Rick put my gag back in and locked my balls down to the floor. Usually after that Rick had left for class and Jose had gone off to work. However, as it was Saturday Rick had other things planned. When Jose had finished all his morning chores, Rick ordered him to the play room with the words, "Last night you were allowed the privilege of being in my bed. Today you will pay the price." At those words I looked up. Until now I had just been staring at the floor feeling sorry for myself. But now I wanted to see what the hell was going on. Jose presented himself to Rick, arms clasped behind his back. head down looking at the floor, and his legs spread wide apart. He really looked the part of a slave displaying himself for his Master. Rick walked up and immediately grabbed Jose's cock which was already at half mast, so to speak. Rick played with it until Jose got fully erect and hard. Rick continued to play with it I watched Jose get more and more turned on. I could see the slight movement in Jose hips as he struggled against the urge to thrust his cock forward. It had to have been s real struggle for him to just stand there and not move an inch while Rick brought him right to the point of a climax. I knew it had been two weeks and by now he must be desperate. But as usual just as Jose was almost at the peak, Rick stopped. He reached down and grabbed Jose's balls, twisting them hard saying, "No way boy, not yet. The weekend is just getting started." Rick continued to squeeze until Jose's hard cock had subsided back to just a mild roar. As I watched my initial reaction was good! Jose needed to suffer, torture the hell out of him! He has had Rick all week while I have been forced to sit here. If he hadn't come along Rick would have never done this to me. Then my thoughts shifted to pity for Jose. I realized I was being selfish. It wasn't his fault Rick was doing this to me. Knowing Rick this would have happened regardless. And Rick was abusing him too. We were still brothers in slavery to our Master. Somehow that idea really hit me. I really wasn't jealous of Jose, I actually cared for him and didn't want to see him suffer. Somewhere along here my cock started to get hard trying to fill my cock cage. As it did another totally different emotion took over. As Rick yanked Jose's balls I wished he was yanking mine. Wait, that's got to be wrong. I hate having my balls twisted and yanked. But no, I was actually sitting there wishing that Rick would come and hurt me the same way he was hurting Jose. Thankfully before I could really think to hard on that last idea, Rick released Jose. Which pulled my mind back to what was going to happen next. Rick reached up on a shelf and pulled down our leather arm binders. I think I told you about them a long time ago, but I don't remember for sure. Anyway Rick's loves to play pow interrogation and these arm binders work very well for it. He had read one time, a book about how the soldiers were tortured during the Vietnam War and since then has forced me to be his pow who he tortures information out of me many times. The problem is I never know what information he wants so I can never give it to him. When I see him pulling them out I assume that it is going to be Jose's turn to play the game. I have to say I really didn't envy Jose as when Rick laces the binders really tight it hurts like hell. You see what Rick does is place your arms into the binder then slowly lace it up, pulling at tight as he can get. As this happens your arms are pulled together behind your back. The tighter they get the more it puts pressure and pain on your shoulders, your arms, and your chest. I know with me that Rick has actually had my elbows pressed together and God did it hurt. As I watch that is exactly what he does to Jose. I can see Jose shoulders pulling back, I can see his chest sticking out, and I know that it has to be hurting him. Rick told me that in Vietnam the torturers would leave the American prisoners like this for days at a time. I have no idea how they could have taken that pain for that long. Thankfully Rick has always known just when I have had enough and ended the game. I watched as Rick attached clover clamps to Jose tits. Rick let the chain drop and by the slight wince of Jose's body I knew it hurt him. Trust me, when your chest is stuck out like Jose's was it makes your tits extra sensitive. As I watched Rick placed an ankle spreader on Jose and then, using a rope, pull his arms up in the air behind his back. Rick pulled until Jose was bent over at the waist as far as he could go. Rick tied the rope off to the wall and then grabbed a wooden paddle. I knew from experience exactly what Rick was going to do. He approached Jose and let the paddle drop hard on the right cheek of Jose's ass. He paused a moment and then hit him on the left. Each swat made Jose jerk just slightly, which pulled his arms and made the weight on his tits swing in the air. Rick knows just how to cause the most pain. He also knows how to cause the most pleasure, which is an amazing combination. It just amazed me, how despite the last week, as I watched Rick slowly torture Jose, my mind was thinking of the pleasure Rick has given me. Had I always just taken that for granted? I had been one full week without it. No wonderful caresses by Rick's loving hands. Yet watching Rick torturing Jose, what I found I really missed more than anything was having him use my body for his own pleasure. Maybe that was what I took for granted. Maybe I took Rick's always being there for granted. I could deal with what ever abuse he might heap on me, if I knew that eventually it would end and I would enjoy the pleasure he could give me. I never realized just how badly I needed him until I didn't have him. I watched, my cock trying to push against it's prison, desperately trying to get hard, as Rick continued his slow methodic torture of Jose. He would hit one ass cheek hard and send Jose bouncing in his bonds. Then Rick would take a break and run his hand over Jose's ass, feeling the heat that was developing from the paddling. Gauging where to deliver the next blow to inflict the most pain. I watched as Rick's fingers traced the curve of Jose's ass, slowly exploring his hole with his fingers. Then he would pull away and lay several more swats on Jose's ass. I watched Jose jerk in his bonds. I knew he hurt and yet his cock stayed rock hard. An example my own cock wanted so badly to imitate but was prevented from doing. Rick would raise the paddle and slam it into Jose's ass and I would feel the impact on mine. I wanted the pain, I wanted it so badly because I knew that it would make Rick happy. I saw the clamps biting into Jose's nipples and I wanted them on mine. I wanted them despite the fact that I knew how bad they hurt. I could almost imagine the pain searing through my chest each time Rick delivered a blow to Jose's ass and the weights whipped around in the air. I wanted the pain that Rick was giving Jose, because I knew Rick was getting off on it. I wanted to be the one serving him with my suffering. Rick had always been there for me and I wanted to be the one there for him. This was incredible all I could think about was how badly I wanted to have Rick torturing me instead of Jose. Yet I wasn't jealous as I also hurt because Jose was hurting. Rick continued his blows on Jose's ass. When he would break and slowly run his hand over Jose's ass I imagined his hand on mine. Then he would again land blow after blow with the paddle. The more he beat Jose the more I felt each blow in my own mind only falling on my ass. If I wasn't wearing my chastity belt my cock would have been just as hard as Jose's. Rick decided that Jose's ass needed a break so he laid the paddle down and moved around to Jose's front. I watched as Rick grabbed Jose's cock and began to pump it in his hand. Up and down he moved his fist bringing Jose closer and closer. It was only a matter of minutes before I heard Jose say, "Sir, please Sir I am going to cum, Sir." Rick replied with, "Not until I give you permission boy. You will not cum until I say you can." Rick's hand released Jose's cock but he did not pull it away. I watched as Rick allowed just one of his fingers to trace the line around Jose's cock head. Just lightly brushing it to hold Jose at the edge, right where Rick wanted him. I say the trembling in Jose's body as he fought against the urge to cum. I could tell what he wanted to do was thrust hard against Rick's hand and bring himself to a climax. But he knew better. He would only cum when and if Rick gave him permission. In addition Rick was good, he could easily hold Jose right at the brink as long as he wanted before he finally allowed him to cum. Rick continued his manipluations of Jose's cock. Playing it and Jose for all he was worth. Finally when Jose was actually shaking with need Rick said, "slave, I will let you cum. But I am going to keep torturing you. Once you have cum it will hurt worse. Are you prepared for that? If you are then you can cum." Rick was right, I remembered him doing that to me before I signed the contract and was deprived of getting to cum. Rick would get me so desperate with need that I would beg him to let me cum and then he would torture me without the horny high that dulled the pain. I hated it when Rick did that because I would almost always beg to cum and once I had, he would make me pay for it by making me hurt. It is always easier to take torture when you are horny the just after you have cum. I heard Jose's voice gasp, "Please Sir let me cum, Sir." That was what I was expecting. As badly as Jose needed to cum I knew there was no way he wouldn't beg Rick for the privilege. Rick stroked Jose's cock a couple more times acting like he was deciding if he was going to say yes or not. I knew he would. He wanted Jose to cum. Then he wanted to really beat Jose's ass. I knew Rick and I knew exactly what he was going to do. "slave you may cum, now," Rick said as he gave Jose's cock one last hard stroke finally bringing Jose to a climax. Jose shot so hard that he actually hit the wall. I watched as he fought the urge to let his legs give out under him. Every ounce of his being erupted with the cum that spewed out of his cock. Thankfully Jose held steady because if he had lost his balance, he would have pulled his arms out of their sockets. Actually I knew Rick would never let that happen. He would catch Jose and hold him until he recovered. But Jose didn't need it. He steadied himself all on his own. I don't know that I could have done that. As I watched Jose cum I wished so desperately that it was me getting to cum. Then when he was done and Rick moved to pick up the paddle I wished I could change places with him and have my ass beaten. I realized I didn't even really care about cumming, what I cared about was being used by Rick. Somehow my whole focused had changed. I wanted the pain more than I did the pleasure. All I wanted was what would make Rick the happiest. Let me stop Alex here. This is what I wanted him to learn. I wanted him to care more about the experience, the pain, the high that he gets from it than the final outcome, his getting to have pleasure. I knew that by my drawing this realization out of Alex it would draw our relationship closer together. When I looked at Alex after Jose had cum I could tell by the look on his face what he was thinking. I really do know him that well. I left Jose hanging there and walked over to Alex. I removed his gag and tipped his face up toward mine. I asked him what he was thinking, what was going through his mind. His cock straining against it's cage gave me a pretty good idea. After asking me permission to speak freely he told me everything. First how much he had hated me all week. How totally unhappy he had been. Then how he had gotten jealous of Jose. Then how he had realized that he wasn't really jealous and that he cared for Jose. Then the revelation I was waiting for, that he had realized how badly he needed the pain. That he felt he had always put what he wanted ahead of what I wanted and he would never do that again. If all I wanted to do was beat his ass than that was what would make him happy. If all I wanted him for, was to keep chained up in the middle of the room, then that was what he wanted. All he needed to make his life happy and fulfilled was knowing that he was serving me and making me happy. I leaned down and kissed my beautiful boy, my beautiful lover drawing it out until I almost lost myself in the touch of his lips. I had missed him so badly this week. I had missed touching him and holding him. I reached down to release the chain from his collar and free him from the beam. However, to my astonishment he asked me not to. He said that if I really wanted him like this than this was the way he wanted to stay. I kissed him again and told him that what I really wanted was to whip his ass just like I was doing to Jose. I told him that he had better get his ass up off the floor and come join the fun. His week of just getting to sit around was over and now he was going to have to pay for the break I had given him. What a wonderful boy I have. I couldn't ask for any better slave than my Alex. I am lucky to have him. But then again I thin he is lucky to have me too. As always if you want to read more of Alex's journals just let me know. I really do enjoy sharing my wonderful slave with all of you. BNDMaster13@yahho.com.