Date: Wed, 17 Nov 2010 16:33:07 -0800 (PST) From: M P Subject: A Bear's Contentment A Bear's Contentment by Hairy1 (This is a work of fiction, and no real persons or events are depicted. Safe sex practices are not depicted; but in real life, get tested and always play safe. If you have comments, please contact the author at ursuspilosus@yahoo.com) Daniel sat at the rivers' edge, dangling his feet in the slowly moving water, feeling them being caressed softly by the flow, the gentle sounds of the current suiting his peaceful reverie. He enjoyed his solitude, despite being in a public park. In the distance he could hear people talking, laughing; he could hear the minimal traffic of the small town, it all flowed around him, surrounding him yet not touching him. He had lived here for years, known by many for his jovial nature and ready smile, yet not truly a part of the community. People liked him but didn't truly know him; he could have a pleasant conversation with almost anyone in town, yet it was as if he drifted through his life and theirs without forming solid connections, just as the river flowed over and around his feet. In his fashion, he was content. Like the river, his life ran smoothly and steadily, with only an infrequent bump. ******************************** His time growing up had been relatively uneventful, a shy and reserved only child, finding his best friends in his books. A voracious reader, he explored places and worlds outside of Midwestern America, thrilled to adventures and romances that would never be his yet he could experience through the written word. He didn't settle on one genre, finding that too limiting, instead he perused it all with the same enthusiasm. He found himself withdrawing from his peers more as he grew in height and girth at an early age, soon followed by a sprouting of dark hair - first his legs and arm pits, then his face and chest. By junior high school, he found himself dreading gym class, not just because of his lack of athleticism or grace, but because of the locker room teasing he had to endure - monkey boy, Dan the ape-man, furball. His size kept the teasing mostly verbal and seldom to his face, and he wrapped his feelings tightly inside himself so that he didn't need to respond to the taunts. The more the other boys tried to get a rise out of him, the stronger the walls inside of him grew, until he could laugh at their jokes and then just turn away, finding that a smile more readily diffused the situation than ignoring it or getting angry. Eventually, as others matured and he didn't stick out so much, the teasing died away, but the emotional wall he had built remained. Like the other guys at his high school and like his friends in literature, he dated several girls, finding the experience pleasant but not worth spending all his time pursuing. Despite his not unsuccessful explorations, he determined that he just wasn't that interested in women sexually - he could perform, but it was without passion or need, it was enjoyable but the spark wasn't there. As he sped through all the literature courses he could fit into his schedule, his parents and teachers encouraged him to exploring writing, but he found he had little original to write about. His book reviews for the school paper were thorough and well thought out, but often included references few of his class mates understood. He found editing the school's literary magazine more to his taste, finally connecting with other students as he offered helpful suggestions regarding their short stories or poetry, never condescending or comparing them to literary giants but instead encouraging their creativity and growing talent, proud of their expanding ability and confidence. Graduation came and went, another passage in his life. He was cordial enough in his congratulations to everyone else but did not feel he would miss anything when he left. He had wanted to commute to a local college, living at home with his parents, but they wouldn't hear of it. They felt going away to school might break him out of his shell, and so across state he went. Indeed, it was eye opening for him, seeing whole new sides of life. His freshman room mate was easy enough to deal with, as neither made waves - but they both lived their own lives, and parted ways with a handshake at the end of the year. In order to help pay his own way, he became a Resident Assistant at the dormitory starting his sophomore year, now having a room all to himself. His easy manner yet fiercely bearded face kept his floor in order, with few problems. He found himself again going out with some women whom he met in class, but found himself more interested in discussing reading assignments than the eventual fooling around. It always ended up a friendly parting, neither side expecting a more permanent situation, yet he found it more distracting than worthwhile. Eventually, he discovered that not only the women were interested in him, but that seemingly a large number of slight, smooth men were as well. At first he was amused by this, but as one term and then another passed, he found himself curious. At first it was awkward, figuring out if the other was truly interested that way or if offense would be taken. He started to accept invitations to study together or to grab a bite to eat, eventually finding himself alone in the room of one of these slender young men, Jim by name. When he felt a hand move to brush across the chest hair spilling from his open shirt collar, he tentatively opened his arms and then wrapped his admirer in then, the hug becoming tighter and longer as he felt a face nestle into the crook of his neck and arms reach around his lower back. His heart was beating harder now, the hug both tender and protective. They stood for what seemed hours, settling into each other, until they both sighed. The peace he felt in that first true bear hug was almost like the peace he felt in his solitude, yet in the presence of another. Too soon, it ended, as the hands behind his back moved forward to begin unbuttoning his shirt. The women he had been with frequently seemed to shy away from his hairy body, more interested in his touch than in exploring him. This was totally different, as he felt his fur stroked and brushed with almost reverence, his brown beard fingered and kissed. As they slowly removed each others shirts, the feel of another's fingers caressing his soft fur sent shivers through him. As he leaned his head down for a kiss, instead he felt warm lips brush over his now exposed nipple, as hands ran across his furry back. He pulled his partner into another hug, feeling the insistent mouth kiss and suck on his nipple, feeling his chest hair brush across the smooth cheeks. His hands wandered up and down the slender back, holding and supporting, as he kissed the top of Jim's head. He found himself growing harder faster than he ever had with a woman, as his body was suddenly appreciated for what it was. He luxuriated in the feel, until with a quick nip Jim brought him back to his senses enough for them both to undo their belts and strip off pants and underwear, falling to the twin bed wrapped in each others arms, kissing now in earnest. Their time together passed quickly yet lasted forever. Jim explored every inch of the Daniel's sturdy body with hands and lips, kissing and tickling and bringing him more physical pleasure than he had ever experienced before. Jim's body was as smooth as any of the women he had been with, yet more muscled and firm; however Jim was less interested in being explored than he was in exploring, in worshipping the big hairy man he was with. Finally moving back into a kiss, Jim covered the hirsute body with his own and obviously luxuriated in the feel of the fur against his smooth skin from chest to calf. As both cocks responded, seeping pre-cum, instinct took over and both men began a slow steady thrusting against each other, their engorged members rubbing and sliding easily as they lubricated each other. Hands groped and grabbed, more frantically, until all too soon the sensations became too much and they exploded, their hot white man seed coating smooth and hairy belly alike. They lay in each others arms for a time, breathing hard, until Jim rolled off and said how much fun that had been, tossed over a handful of tissues and announced that they had better clean off as his room mate would soon be back from his evening class. Wiping his sticky belly, Daniel sat up and pulled his pants on, then stood and tossed on his shirt without buttoning it. He opened his arms for a hug, but Jim was busy straightening things up. As he made to leave, Jim hurried over and gave the hairy chest one last rub, saying "we have to do this again", planted a quick peck on Daniel's cheek, and opened the door. Walking back to his room, still breathing a bit heavily, he thought back over it all, and regretted nothing. He had left on the same friendly basis as with any of the girls he had been with, and had somehow found this much more satisfying physically. He found the novel experience of his bulky hairy body being desired exhilarating. While Jim's smooth body hadn't overly excited him, the feeling of Jim's cock certainly had. He continued to explore more with Jim and others like him, smooth men who wanted to admire a big hairy body. Always he tried to give as much pleasure as he received, though he still felt something was missing. He moved from kissing, hugging and frottage to sucking and being sucked, finding increasing pleasure the more he shared. It took him a while to become fully aroused when with them, but he felt maybe that was just his shy nature. He was a man they enjoyed and wanted to experience pleasure with, but never was a bond formed that lasted beyond that pleasure. Always he was alone and content with that after, though he realized that maybe there could be more. Was it his own inner walls, or was it simply the type of experience he was having? It so happened, as he opened himself more and more to these men he was with, with a single semester of college remaining, that his parents passed away in a house fire, dying in their sleep from smoke inhalation. The only people he truly had felt at ease with were suddenly gone, along with the home he had grown up in and the books that he been his companions. At the funeral, family friends cried with him, his walls down in his grief and sorrow. Acquaintances from high school shook his hand or offered quick hugs as they said their condolences. He felt the sincerity, the shared sorrow, but no bond of friendship. None of the men from college had come; theirs' was not that type of relationship. And as he dealt with the small details that were left to him, settling with the insurance in order to pay funeral expenses, selling the lot the house had stood upon, he did it all alone. He settled his feelings back inside that safe zone deep within himself, locking them away, knowing that he was not the type of person for whom deep feelings ran or would run for. Solitude became his comfort and the friend he sought. Returning to school, he focused on making up missed classes and homework. Suddenly, the trysts he had so enjoyed became something to avoid. They had been infrequent enough that few noticed the difference. Again, a graduation came, and he could cordially congratulate his classmates as their families clustered around them, before walking over to finish packing the old station wagon that had survived the fire. He looked behind him at the dormitory that he had spent the last four years in, and realized that it wasn't home he was leaving, it was just a place he had stayed. He stepped into the car, closed the door, and drove off to begin again. He bounced several times over the years, first to the city, where he found the job of his dreams in the publishing industry, editing books. The large company he was with was ideal, giving him a wide variety to work with, and he was quite successful. He found he could relate to his co-workers over the similarity of their interests, comparing books they were working on, sharing a laugh in the break room, talking yet not becoming close. Yet life in the city was not for him. No matter where he went, his large body was bumped into by the crowd. The cramped apartment he could afford had paper thin walls, and between the noise of his neighbors and heavy traffic and construction, he never felt alone. It left him nervous and tired. So he moved to the suburbs of the same city, to a mid-sized company, promising to keep up with acquaintances at his office but not doing so. However, the suburbs where not a better fit for him. The duplex he rented still let him hear every noise next door. The neighbors were so busy climbing the social ladder that they couldn't spare the time to smile back. As the company strove to grow, he was forced to attempt to socialize and network to build the company, taking time away from actual editing. He felt an emptiness, not belonging either at home or work. He briefly moved back to his old home town, taking a job at the local newspaper editing articles. He liked the small town feel, but found the fact that he knew the names of everyone but not the people themselves to be disconcerting. Instead of reaching out and meeting people, he found himself retreating further, adapting back to his avoidance habits from junior high school. The articles in the paper themselves became meaningless to him, taking the joy out of the job. When the opportunity to edit for a fledging publishing company several hours away came up, he was immediately drawn to it. It was in a small Midwestern town, yet a place where he knew no one. After his interview, as he walked through the small downtown, with its' park, river, shops, and large library, he felt a spark of the contentment that had left him so long ago. This was a place he felt he could belong. The company was small and happy to be so, the owners liked small town life and didn't want to lose that for themselves, their families, or their employees; it all seemed ideal. And so he moved that one final time, buying a small two bedroom home (one bedroom to sleep in, the other converted to a library of course) with a large yard where he could feel his privacy and yet still walk into town. That was well over ten years ago, and he had never regretted it. ******************************** The leap of a large fish nearby broke Daniel from his reverie. He didn't quite look over quickly enough to see the fish, but just to see the spreading circles caused by its' action, and eventually the ripples lapped over his toes. He looked at his watch and was surprised at how long he had sat distracted. Rising, he slipped his sandals on and headed over to the library, a Saturday afternoon ritual. One would think that editing books would leave him without a desire to read more in his free time, but it only served to pique his interest. Besides, editing was mostly done online now, and part of the joy of reading was the weight of a book in his hands, the sound of a page rustling as it was turned, the smell of the paper, the actual character of a physical book. Pushing open the big glass doors, Daniel entered the quiet lobby area of the small town library. The facility was actually very large and technologically modern for a town this size, in part due to the generosity of the founders of the publishing house he worked at. He occasionally would spend time perusing the shelves for treasures he had never heard of, but as he preferred to read in the comfort of his own home, he generally reserved his books from the online card catalogue, which allowed him access to a vast number of titles and to have them conveniently dropped off at his local library free of charge. As he walked up to the circulation desk, a friendly voice greeted him. "Hi Daniel. You're running later than usual, I was starting to think that I was going to have to find space for this large stack you put on hold." "Now Joy, you know me better than that, what would I do without a book or two about? Besides, then you'd be bored without processing all these returns I have for you." Daniel said as he emptied his canvas carry bag into the returns slot. "Oh, don't worry about that. The new scan system checks them in for me right as you slide them down. All I have to do is either reshelf them or sort them over to the bins for the interlibrary loan van. It leaves me a lot more time to help out visitors. I see you are finally winding down that one series, books 6 and 7 came in." "Oh, great. I started reading them at just the right time too; I can read the whole series through without waiting, as the final book just came out. I have a hold on it already. These authors have really caught my attention; it is fascinating that they can co-write so seamlessly, their strengths are so complimentary." "Yes, these books are very popular; it is hard to believe the series is the first published full length work by either, before this they were well known for short stories, both individually and then together. That last book just came in a couple days ago, and is already checked out. There are so many holds it is listed as no interlibrary loan as of yet." "I'm not first in line? Dang, luckily I have plenty of other reading to keep me busy!" "Ha, that is for sure. Let me check, yes, you are next on the list for our copy, and it is listed as no renewals, so you should see it soon." Continuing his easy banter with the librarian, Daniel hands over his library card for scanning, and then reloads his canvas bag with the new books, an assorted collection with something for any mood which might strike him. With a wave good bye, he turns and heads out the door for the short walk home, whistling tunelessly to himself, trying to decide what to start reading after making a hearty dinner for himself. ******************************** Daniel's week goes by as always, steady and smooth. He is busy at work, yet not so much so as to be stressed. His co-workers are friendly and they often chat about life's happenings - a kid's soccer game, the weather, gardens, asking if Daniel is dating. There is interest but no pressure. Daily he returns home to his garden and to his books, and enjoys his peaceful solitude. The week passes, then another. For Daniel, life is good and he is content. ******************************** Another weekend arrives, as does autumn. Daniel enjoys the changing foliage in his garden and the cool crisp air at night. Sitting by the river, he notices some of the leaves have turned, and sees one gently fall from an overhanging oak branch into the water. The currents, slow and steady as always, catch the leaf and draw it along, then suddenly something, maybe a rock beneath the surface, causes the leaf to spin a bit and drift erratically before finally again catching the flow and straightening back out, following a new path, just as smooth and steady as before. He watches the leaf move away until it is out of sight, a slight smile on his face, pondering how the smallest change can affect things, then turns to head over to the library. As he walks into the library, the smile still on his face, he hears an animated discussion at the desk. Joy is speaking with someone at the library counter that he has never seen before, and apologizing. As Daniel draws closer, he overhears that the man had mistakenly dropped the wrong book down the return slot and wanted it back as he had only 100 pages left of this eighth and last book in a series, but the new system has already checked it in and there are holds by multiple people. The man is pleading that there must be something she can do, he is loud but not threatening, but Joy sadly shakes her head. Standing in the queue, Daniel has time to look at the man, he is handsome in a bearish manner, shorter than Daniel but almost as stocky, a full black beard shot through with some grey, his hair long and in a pony tail. Daniel can't help but notice from his angle that the man has a behind which is very nice to look at, his jeans fitting just right. As the man moves aside, Joy smiles and says hello. They chat for a few minutes, then along with a normally large stack Joy hands Daniel the book that had just been returned, as he is next on hold list. As excited as Daniel is to get to read the novel, he can't help but notice the man still standing nearby, looking a bit dejected (Daniel knows how enthralled one can be with a really good book, so he understands). Motioning him over, Daniel explains that he couldn't help but overhear the discussion, and with a smile he generously resolves the dilemma by checking out the book and handing it to the man with an offer to let him borrow it to finish. Joy is smiling (a good librarian likes happy readers) but says in a cautionary tone "Remember, the book is in your name so you're responsible." "Well, I'm usually a pretty good judge of character and I'll trust him. Anyone who likes books this much can't be that bad." The man is surprised, thanking Daniel several times. Daniel writes down his address and tells him to drop the book off in the mailbox when he is done, "but don't take too long as I am anxious to read it. Luckily I have the rest of these to keep me occupied." The next day, Sunday, Daniel is gardening in the back yard. It is unseasonably hot, he is a bit sweaty, but then, that is what happens to big hairy guys in hot weather. A light breeze travels through the trees, keeping it from being unbearable. As he pauses to look around at his progress, he hears his doorbell ring. Quickly wiping dirty hands on his pants, he hurries through the house to answer, wondering who it could be as there are no Sunday deliveries and he never has unexpected company. Standing on the other side of the screened door is the man from the library, with the book and a plate of what looks to be homemade cookies. "Hello there" the man says, looking a bit sheepish. "Thank you so much for loaning me the book, it ends even better than I'd imagined. I intended to read it fast to get it back to you, and that was no problem at all as I couldn't put it down. I'm so glad you live close to the library, I'm new and don't know streets well." "You needn't have gone to the trouble; I could have waited a couple days." "Oh, it's no trouble. So far, you're the only person I know in town, and I really appreciate how kind you were." Suddenly realizing his manners, Daniel opens the door and takes the book and cookies, stretching out his hand. "Well, if I'm the only person you know, I better tell you my name. It's Daniel, Daniel Bjornson." With a firm shake, the man smiles, a smile which Daniel can't help but think lights up his face. "Pleased to meeting you Daniel, I'm Miles McMahon." Smiling himself, Daniel invites Miles in for lemonade, apologizing for being such a mess from gardening (though his house is tidy). "Oh, nothing wrong with a big guy with dirt on his hands who's sweaty from working hard. You're fine." They discuss the series of books over lemonade and the cookies, Miles having to curb his enthusiasm in order not to reveal anything from the finale. They compare these books to others they have both enjoyed, finding many common interests, yet also discovering new ones to explore. It seems neither dominates the conversation, both has opinions and a willingness to listen to the others' thoughts. The discussion at times is spirited, and at times breaks down into laughter. Looking at the time, Miles apologizes "Wow, the afternoon has really gone by fast, I know you were busy in the garden and I didn't mean to take so much of your time. I better get going, but it has been wonderful getting to know you Daniel." Watching Miles stroll up the sidewalk, Daniel again finds his eyes drawn to the behind that fits so well in Miles' jean, and thinks about how nice it was to speak to him. ******************************** Daniel's week again goes by as always, steady and smooth. He is still busy at work, his co-workers are friendly and they often chat about life's happenings - a kid's soccer game, the weather, gardens. But this week they also comment about how Daniel seems to be smiling privately, something must be up. He just laughs and says "no, nothing is up" but finds the smile back on his face anyway. The next weekend he finds himself actually hurrying from the river to the library, ready to return the book in question, but when he doesn't see Miles, he realizes that he had hoped to, to be able to discuss the conclusion. "How silly you are" he thinks, shaking his head, "one pleasant conversation doesn't mean someone is interested in knowing you better." Life continues, Daniel is content, and time flows on. ******************************** The next weekend, there is a small art fair in the next town over, and Daniel decides to go. He browses the booths, chatting with some of the artists, buying a snack here and there ("have to maintain this burly physique" he chuckles to himself). He hears music from the other side of the park, and wanders over, munching on a bag of fresh kettle corn. It is a rich baritone voice, accompanied only by a guitar, singing an old folk tune. He finds himself drawn to it, picking up strong visualizations from the tone and words. Height having its' advantage, he draws closer and looks over the heads of the crowd. With a start, he realizes it is his acquaintance from the library, his eyes closed as he sings. Daniel slowly sits down at the back of the crowd, leaning against a tree, watching and listening but invisible as always. He finds his eyes closing slightly, his kettle corn forgotten, the music flowing across him like the water of the river, peaceful and soothing, leaving him content. He's never experienced this before, contentment not from solitude but from the presence of another, for definitely Miles is fully present in his music. All too soon, Daniel's reverie is broken by applause, and the audience getting up. Blinking quickly, as if awakening from a dream, he rises to his feet, clapping with everyone else. He moves forward to drop a few dollars in the guitar case as other people are doing, his head bowed as usual in an unfamiliar crowd. But escape is not that easy, "Daniel! Hello. What a pleasant surprise." Miles says, leaning forward to clasp Daniel's hand. They can only exchange pleasantries briefly, as Miles needs to move out of the way for the next performer, whom he has agreed to help set up for (he had played acoustically, so the amplifiers need to be connected), but Daniel feels a strange warmth inside as Miles tells him how pleased he is to see him. "Miles that was just wonderful. You are such a talented performer; I've never been so drawn into a song before." "I'll be performing tomorrow as well, I'm hanging out at the art fair all weekend - maybe you'd like to come with me and some of the others for a drink after we close up tonight?" "No no, I'd stick out like a sore thumb amongst all you creative types, I'm glad you found a group of friends, I hope to see you again sometime." Daniel kicks himself as him walks away, thinking it would have been nice to spend time with Miles, even in a crowd. "He makes me feel so comfortable" Daniel thinks, but is unable to bring himself to turn around and change his mind, instead leaving the fair so as to be at the library at his normal time. The next day in his garden, Daniel keeps finding himself drifting to the sound of Miles' music, tempted to go back and listen again, but unable to do so. He tells himself there is nothing wrong with going, that artists enjoy having their work being appreciated, but shies away anyway. Eventually he walks to the river, letting the water flow over his feet, but hearing the echo of a voice in the current, in the rustle of the leaves. ******************************** The work week goes by slowly. Daniel finds himself a bit listless, missing something but not knowing what. He hasn't felt this way for so long. After being asked what is on his mind several times, he is more careful to laugh and smile as usual. He draws himself close and returns to normal, letting his routine comfort him, letting life returns to its' usual pattern. Over the next several weeks, Daniel sees Miles around town a few times, always at a distance, his eyes somehow always drawn directly to him. Miles is always with someone else, talking animatedly, laughing. Daniel is happy for him, that he has found friends and that he is fitting in, and never walks over to say anything, not wanting to intrude. Always Daniel has the river, even when the approaching winter makes the water to cold to dip his feet in. He has his solitude and peace, and tells himself that it is enough. ******************************** As the seasons change, Daniel's routine remains steady as always, work, the library, his garden, his reading. One Saturday, as he turns from checking out his latest stack of books, he sees Miles standing behind him with his own stack of books. "That one on the top of your stack is good, but you have to have read the earlier books to really get the depth of it" Miles says. "I've read them, and agree" Daniel says with a smile, but again hears the music in Miles' voice. He swallows, and with uncharacteristic boldness, asks "Would you like to go for a cup of coffee to talk books?" Miles hesitates, and Daniel quickly blurts "Don't worry about it, you're probably busy, it was just a thought." "It isn't that, I'd really enjoy going for coffee" he says with a big smile "but I don't drive, so I'll have to keep on eye on the clock as my walk home is a long one and these small town buses didn't run very often or very late on Saturdays." The local coffee shop, Joe's Jo, is locally owned and a quick couple of blocks down the street. It is a comfortable old area with sofas and chairs, a small stage for performances, as much a hang out place as anything. They discuss books as they sip the perfectly brewed coffee, and then how things are going with Miles since he has moved to town. He says he has met a lot of people, especially artists and musicians, which allows him to get to the art fairs and play much more easily. "They are all fun people, but I've really enjoyed this discussion over books, it's something I've has missed so much" he says, explained that before moving he had belonged to multiple reading clubs and routinely attended talks by authors on the campus of the city college. "So few people here are widely enough read to catch all my obscure references, it is just so nice to relax and talk without explaining" Daniel laughs, "In my office, most of my literary references are caught onto, but most people tended to stick to one genre and aren't as eclectic in tastes as we are, so I do get my share of blank looks." "I'm sure you get more looks than blank ones, Daniel." Just then, before Daniel can puzzle out the statement, they both hear the bus pass by, and realize that they've lost track of time. "Damn" Miles says "now I'll have to walk." "Don't be silly, we can just head to my place, get the car, and I'll drive you home." "That is too much to ask. I knew I needed to watch the time, this is my own fault." "There's no fault to be had. The bus was early. I'm the one who invited you, so if there is fault to be had, it is mine." "Ok ok, there is no fault. I just am used to be independent, and with all the rides I have to use to get to performances, I'm sensitive about accepting more" Miles states as he reluctantly accepts the ride. They walk back to Daniel's house, where he invites Miles to step inside. "No, I'm fine, I don't want to impose," so Daniel quickly grabs the keys and starts the car. "Sorry it's nothing fancy, once I got used to the old station wagon, I just seem to find a big comfortable car and stick with it." Driving to the apartment, Miles suggests "Maybe we could meet next week at the library, and you can tell me what you thought of the new book over coffee?" It becomes part of Daniel's routine, as the seasons have ended Miles weekend art fair performances. Each Saturday, there is the river, the library, and then coffee, always careful to keep an eye open for the bus. ******************************** As fall turns to winter, one week at coffee Daniel sees a sign for the following Friday when Miles will be the performing artist for the evening (Joe's Jo frequently has folk singers or poets on Friday nights to attract a crowd). "What's this? That's wonderful. I thought you might be missing your performances at the fairs." "Yeah, I'm sort of excited. The sound will carry differently inside than it does outside." "I bet you'll sound great." "I hope so. I hadn't mentioned it as I didn't think you liked my music that much." "Remember that day in the park? I guess I've just never told you how that very first song that I heard you sing still haunts me. It was so beautiful. I hear hints of it all the time." And with a burst of confidence "Oh, I'll definitely be here." ******************************** The week passes as it always does, and that next Friday, Daniel is a bit nervous about going out by himself to see Miles, this seeking out companionship instead of solitude, this break of routine, all disrupting his sense of security. But he steels himself, telling himself it is silly, that this is just a night out at Joe's Jo to hear music, nothing to be nervous about. His quells his excitement to see Miles perform with the knowledge that this isn't about spending time with Miles, and that Miles' friends are sure to be there as well. Daniel walks the few blocks to the coffee shop, hugging his coat to himself as the weather has truly turned brisk. He finds it to be more crowded than he had thought it would be, and hangs back, walking the block a few times, shy of the crowd. Eventually, hearing the strains of music, he gathers himself and enters, carefully moving to the back of the room so as not to bump anyone with his large frame. Then he sees Miles at the front of the crowd. Already a song or two into the informal set, Miles has paused and is talking about his music, but scanning the crowd. Suddenly he sees Daniel, their eyes meeting, and he bursts into a smile. "This one is for a very good friend of mine" he says as he settles back onto his stool, his guitar cradled against him. Slowly, steadily, he strums and softly sings, the volume growing and building, filling the room as the audience quiets to hear every nuance, and the song that Daniel can't get out of his mind takes shape around him. Daniel quickly sits down, stunned, mesmerized. "Could he really have done this just for me?" Listening to his friends' rich voice again, he is rapidly lost within the song. As the night continues on, Daniel feels himself wrapped within in the comfort of Miles' voice, the gentle movements of the crowd not intrusive but instead enhancing the music as they are obviously enjoying it too. He is startled when someone asks if he'd like a drink, and orders an espresso, the smooth deep taste flowing with the music, letting him drift just as the current of the river does. When finally the music is over, the coffee house is abuzz with conversation. It seems the evening will last a long time, as people order more drinks and snacks. Daniel sees Miles surrounded by admirers, and his instinct is to retreat. But instead, knowing what Miles' favorite beverage is, a highly sweetened cappuccino, orders one and brings it over to him. Daniel hesitates to interrupt, seeing Miles fully engaged with the crowd, obviously enjoying the discussion about his music as much as he does the discussions about books. Just then, Miles spots Daniel standing back in the crowd. He excuses himself from the group, comes over and surprises Daniel by throwing his arms around him for a hug. "Thank you for coming, it means a lot to me." he says. "I thought at first maybe you had changed your mind." Handing him the drink, Daniel says "I'm so glad I came, it was simply wonderful. You are so talented." By now, the crowded has again surrounded Miles; tell him how good he was. Daniel is trapped by his side, one of Miles' arms still around him, smiling to people he knows from town who greet him as well. He makes small talk about various songs, at ease in the crowd and conversation now, enjoying how everyone has appreciated Miles' performance. Eventually, Joe's Jo is ready to close, and the crowd disperses. Joe (yes, there really is one) walks over. "Hey, we're closing, but you're welcome to stay inside and wait on the last bus, it isn't for another 45 minutes. I'll wait with you and lock up after. I owe you one, that's the best business we've had in a while." "Miles, you could come over to my place for a nightcap. That way Joe doesn't have to wait. Then I'll drive you home." Miles won't hear of accepting another ride, but not wanting to keep Joe, accepts the offer of a nightcap. As they reach Daniel's house, a cold drizzle begins to fall, and they are happy to get inside and take off their coats. Before Daniel can ask what Miles would like, he finds himself in yet another hug. "Thank you again for coming." Daniel wraps his arms around Miles, holding him close, feeling his warmth through their clothes. He finds himself relaxing, letting his face fall forward, feeling Mile's hair brush his nose. "Thank you Miles, for playing that song, for making such beautiful music." They remain there for a moment, and then Daniel remembers his place as host, and gently extricates himself and asks what Miles would like. "Surprise me." Thinking about it, Daniel decides on a honey liquor that he enjoys, that the rich sweet taste might be to Miles liking and that the thick liquid might be soothing on his throat, and pours two cordials. Sitting in the living room, they pass time in pleasant conversation sipping the drinks, enjoying the company. Time passes too quickly, and all too soon Miles excuses himself, leaving to catch the bus, still refusing to hear of another ride. ******************************** And so Daniel's life continues smoothly, his weeks following the same routine. The Saturday book discussions continue, but they find more and more topics to discuss. Daniel has come to look forward to these more than he ever expected possible, and realizes that he has found something he has missed in his life, a true friend. ******************************** Winter arrives in full force, and the weather gets worse just on time for another coffee shop performance by Miles. Daniel eagerly attends, enjoying the music, engaging in conversation afterwards. Again he invites Miles over for a nightcap, and they have a pleasant conversation, until Miles determines it is time to leave for the bus. "Miles, why don't you just let me drive you home? The weather is getting bad, I'd feel better knowing you made it ok." "Daniel, no. I can get myself home. You shouldn't have to drive in weather like this." Not wanting to argue, and knowing how stubborn Miles is, Daniel drops the topic. As they walk to the entry, Miles wraps Daniel in another hug. "Just to keep me warm out there, I hope you don't mind." Daniel sighs and pulls Miles closer, not knowing how to say how much he doesn't mind this closeness. As they open the door, the snow and wind burst in. Miles hurries out so the door can be closed. Deep in thought over how good the hug felt, Daniel turns the television on. He is distracted until he hears the buzz of a weather alert, and sees scrolling across the screen that the roads have become icy and snow covered, and people are advised not to go out. He finds himself worrying about the bus situation, and for the first time he calls Miles' apartment to see if he has gotten home safely, feeling like he might be intruding but knowing he won't sleep unless he knows. After hanging up on the answering machine several times, he starts to pace about. The bus ride shouldn't have taken so long. Maybe Miles just doesn't answer the phone late at night. And Miles has made it clear that he can take care of himself, he doesn't want to be offered help all the time. But Daniel can't stop worrying, something he isn't used to as he is normally so self-contained. He bundles up in his coat determined to make sure everything is alright. Walking out into the storm, Daniel sees how bad the roads are. He decides that before he drives himself to Miles' apartment and embarrasses them both, he will just walk up the few blocks to the coffee shop and make sure that Miles hasn't taken shelter there if the bus is running late. His head bowed against the heavy wind and snow, he trudges through the wet snow, which already is high enough to cover his ankles. Finally looking ahead, he sees that there are no lights on at Joe's Jo, so indeed Miles couldn't be there. But as he is about to turn and trudge home, he sees what appears to be a figure standing at the bus stop. "No, he couldn't really still be standing there in this weather" Daniel thinks. As he hurries forward, he discovers it is indeed Miles, stubbornly waiting at the bus stop. By now, he has stood there for over half an hour, he appears to be soaked through and cold, but he doesn't want to hear of not waiting. "Maybe I'll just start to walk home, if the bus passes I can flag them down." he says through chattering teeth. "Absolutely not. I'll carry you back to my place if I have to, but you are not walking and you are not staying here." "Oh come on, Daniel, you can't make me ..." "Don't try me, Miles, you're coming now. I'll drive you home after you warm up." Daniel states with uncharacteristic determination. He finds that his protective feelings are over riding his need to be polite or give in, and puts his arm around Miles to draw him close, only to feel a deep shivering. Concerned, Daniel hurries him home, keeping an arm around him the whole way as he stumbles a bit, offering support, warmth and shelter. Back at home, Daniel finds that Miles is indeed soaked through. Getting him out of his jacket, it is obvious that his jeans and shirt are dripping too. As Daniel points Miles to the shower, Miles insists that he doesn't want to drip on the carpet. "Stop worrying about stuff like that, I can clean it up, you need to get warm!" Daniel practically growls out, and drags him along to the bathroom, starting a hot shower. As the steam starts to billow around the shower curtain, Daniel back out, giving Miles the privacy to get undressed and get in the shower, but hearing the curtain draw closed he reaches in to grab the sodden clothing in order to dry it. He leaves Miles one of his robes, which is large but hopefully not too much so. When Miles emerges from the shower, Daniel discovers that he is furrier than imagined; it can be seen around the loose robe. He is covered with fine black hair, not a pelt like Daniel sports on his chest and back, but a complete covering as far as can be seen. Quickly collecting himself, Daniel guides Miles over to the couch, sitting him down in front of the roaring fire that he has lit, and then ambles over to the kitchen. He has prepared hot tea laced with honey and some brandy, and brings two large mugs over, sitting on the couch next to Miles. Miles still shivers now and then; even the hot shower hasn't quite warmed him. Without thinking, Daniel moves to put an arm around him, but Miles draws slightly away. Thinking he has done something wrong, Daniel begins to apologize, but Miles speaks first. "There's something I have to tell you" he says, "because if you put your arm around me when I'm in just your robe it will be obvious. I hope you can still be my friend and don't take this the wrong way, but I'm very attracted to you." "What?" "Yeah, that's why I've never stayed too long; I never wanted to risk our friendship. But I can't hide like this." Seeing Miles beside him, still needing warmth, needing him, something opens up in Daniel, and he lets his walls slip. Carefully putting an arm around Miles, drawing him close, he says "I'm attracted to you too, and have been from the first time I saw you." Miles laughs, all joy again, relief flooding his face. As he warms up, Miles relaxes, snuggling into Daniel's side. Daniel realizes that it feels good, comfortable. Obviously Miles feels the same as the stress of the evening causes him to fall asleep nestled against Daniel's side. They sit this way for almost an hour, and Daniel is surprised to find himself content in the firelight, the sound of Miles' breathing soothing, his growing warmth comforting. This contentment is something that he has only felt in his quiet solitude before. It ends all soon, as Miles awakens to the sound of the buzzer from the drier announcing that his clothes are dry. "I think you're warmed up now, and as your clothes are dry, I can drive you home if you want." Looking out the window, Miles says "I can't let you drive in that weather." "Well. I can't let you walk in that weather, so you'll just have to stay the night." "Only if it is no problem." "Miles, let's not spin in that circle again. It's agreed, you'll stay here." Daniel draws Miles up in his arms, hugging him briefly, and then shows him to the bedroom. "You can have the bed, I'll sleep on the couch." "What? No way, if anyone is taking the couch, I am." "No, you are my guest, you get the bed." "Don't start that with me. I've already inconvenienced you." "Well..." "No, I am not ..." "Sssshhhh, stop. I guess we could share the bed, it is a king." "Daniel, I like that idea." Surprised, Daniel reaches into a drawer and tosses Miles some shorts to sleep in, and excuses himself to the bathroom. When he returns, he finds Miles in bed with the shorts lying on the floor, and gets in on his own side, the middle empty. Laying there, he feels Miles shivering a bit again, and rolls to face him, to see a smiling face looking at him. "See, I'm still cold, you better snuggle up to me to keep me warm." Daniel laughs, comfortable instead of nervous and slowly moves over to the middle of the bed as Miles rolls over as well. They spoon, Miles' back nestled against Daniel's hairy front, and as Miles drifts back to sleep, Daniel lightly touches him, stroking his fur softly, amazed at how sensual it feels, understanding a bit about how those men from college were fascinated by him. He hardens, but lets Miles sleep, amazed at his reaction. He wants Miles in so many ways, not just physically. Despite his erection, he falls asleep content, warm inside and out. ******************************** Morning comes, and Daniel slowly awakens to find that Miles has rolled over and is facing him, watching him. "You're beautiful as you sleep, so relaxed, just like you look when I've watched you as I sang." Miles leans forward and kisses Daniel, surprising him. Without thinking, Daniel responds, leaning in, kissing him back, hardening again. They wrap each other in their arms as they kiss, holding each other tightly. Daniel closes his eyes as Miles' tongue is gently pushed into his mouth, exploring. Daniel runs his tongue slowly along Miles' tongue, caressing it. They taste each other, tongues moving from one mouth to the other, lips moving against each other. Their beards brush against each other, as does their chest hair as they breath in and out, and Daniel shudders at the sensuous nature of it, the feel of another's' body hair moving softly on his amplifying the feelings of touch, each individual hair sending pleasure through his system. He moans softy, running his fingers through Mile's long hair, loose from the ponytail. He feels Miles' fingers run across his broad shoulders, down his side and then caressing his belly, and follows suit, marveling at the sensation of touching and being touched, amazed at his friend's body and the reactions it evokes in him. Miles slowly leans his head back, breaking the kiss, nibbling playfully at Daniel's lower lip. "Daniel, we need to do something about those sleeping shorts you have on." With that, Miles rolls Daniel from his side to his back, and returns to kissing him, covering Daniel's body with his own, rubbing gently, their hard members pressed together, separated only by the shorts. Daniel lets his hands wander over Miles' back, then down to lightly touch his hairy ass, cupping it. Miles slides back a bit, pressing his ass firmly into Daniel's hands, and lowers his mouth to Daniel's neck, licking at the edge of Daniel's beard, caressing the skin there with his tongue, then leaning closer, he kisses Daniel's neck, small short kisses along the beard line, from one side to the other, careful not to miss a spot. "What a beautiful bear you are Daniel" Miles whispers as his mouth reaches the left ear. Then he runs his tongue along Daniel's earlobe and presses it inside, causing Daniel to squirm under him, moaning turning into laughter. Miles quickly turns his attention to more soft kisses along the beard line, while Daniel breathes deeply, catching his breath, just in time for Miles to repeat the process on his right ear. Laughing, squirming, Daniel realizes that he hasn't been tickled by anyone since he was a small child, and that as comfortable as he is, he enjoys the sensation, the release of tension caused by the laughter, the exhilaration, the playfulness. Deftly, he shifts his bulk and rolls them both, landing Miles on his back with Daniel over him, and he plants a large kiss directly on Miles' lips, pushing his tongue in aggressively now. He feels Miles' hands grip his ass through the sleep shorts, while he has one hand behind Miles' head and the other on the small of his back. Continuing to kiss but softly now, he begins to massage and knead the muscles at the small of Miles' back as he rubs his body over him. His lips travel from Miles' mouth across his face, kissing the tip of his nose, his right cheek then his left cheek, his left eye lid then his right eye lid. He rubs his lips gently across Miles' right eye lashes then his left eye lashes, kissing his left eye brow and then his right eye brow. Settling his weight a bit, he kisses across Miles' forehead with a deep sigh. "Miles, you're so handsome" he whispers as he brings his lips back over to Miles' mouth and lowers them for another kiss. It occurs to Daniel how unlike his other experiences this is. There is no rush to get anywhere, just a need to explore each other, to enjoy each other. Each is giving and receiving mutual pleasure. There is no end goal of sex, just the experience and joy of being together. He snuggles in momentarily, burying his face into Miles' neck, and sighs again. Miles holds him tight, feeling the large man relaxing, the heat of their bodies pressing together warm and comfortable. Suddenly, Daniel shifts his face and presses his tongue into Miles' ear, catching him by surprise. He wriggles his tongue around, making Miles squirm and laugh uncontrollably beneath him. "What do you think, should I do the other side too?" Daniel whispers, smiling broadly after lifting his head up. Gasping for breath, Miles merely turns his head to expose his other ear, and Daniel leans in, nibbling the lobe then licking, causing Miles to laugh and squirm all the more, the movements of his body beneath Daniel causing even more pleasure, exciting them both more. They roll each other over several times, playing, touching, exploring, laughing from tickling or the sheer joy of it. Then, while Miles has Daniel on his back, the game begins to change. His mouth moves from Daniel's neck to his chest, and he nuzzles in the thick brown and grey fur, running his tongue over the skin beneath. He softly licks Daniel's right nipple, causing Daniel's back to arch up, and then takes it in his mouth with a slow kiss. He sucks it gently, playfully running his tongue in circles around it as his hands move slowly up and down Daniel's sides. Lifting his head, he sees Daniel's half closed eyes, and smiles, lowering his mouth down now over the left nipple. He licks in circles around it, then over the tip. In anticipation, Daniel lifts his chest slightly, offering his nipple, and Miles gently takes it in his mouth and sucks at it, tonguing it, moving with the rhythm of Daniel's breathing. He gently rolls Daniel's saliva moistened right nipple between his finger tips, two similar yet different sensations flooding Daniel. Miles goes back and forth between the nipples several times, each time sucking harder, then running his teeth gently over the engorged flesh, causing shudders and moans. As he lifts his head, Daniel moves his hands to beneath Miles' armpits and draws him up for a deep kiss, then another. He then pulls Miles further up, until his chest is poised over Daniel's mouth, and Daniel begins the process of licking across the black fur of the chest above him, the kissing each nipple in turn. The nipples are teased with a tongue just barely touching their tips, then kissed again, over and over. Miles pulls his knees up, crouching over Daniel, pressing his chest to Daniel's face. As Daniel continues to kiss and then suck on Miles' nipples, he reaches back and again starts to run his hands over Miles' furry ass, slowly running a finger up and down the crack. Eventually, Miles straightens up, looking down at the supine form of Daniel, the large hirsute man smiling back up at him. Daniel runs a hand over Miles' hairy belly, grinning hugely. "Miles, I've never seen anyone as attractive as you are." "Then you haven't been looking in the mirror. And it is time for me to see the rest. I haven't forgotten about those shorts." With that, Miles slips a hand into each side of the waist band of Daniel's shorts, and slowly crawls backwards, exposing Daniel's pubic hair. Daniel raises his ass a bit, to allow his shorts to be slipped off, and Miles carefully lifts the front of the waist band up and over Daniel's erection, exposing six inches of hardness with a thick head and thicker at the base. Miles gently slides Daniel's shorts down lower, exposing a pair of large hairy balls. He allows his fingers to gently caress the outside of Daniel's thighs as he moves the shorts lower, then removes them the rest of the way, lingering after tossing them to the floor to run a finger softly up and down the arch of each of Daniel's feet. He then crawls slowly back up, straddling Daniel's hips, his seven inch cock almost as thick as Daniel's. Both of them are leaking precum, and Miles takes both cocks in his hand and slowly strokes them, spreading the precum. Both men moan softly, the heat generated between their cocks growing, the feel of Miles' hand travelling across the smooth flesh bringing intense pleasure. Daniel reaches his hands up to Miles' shoulders, rubbing softly, and looks deeply into his eyes. "Kiss me again, Miles, please kiss me." Moving his hands, one to each side of Daniel, Miles leans down and begins a deep passionate kiss. Their cocks are trapped between them, precum lubricating both of their big furry stomachs, and they begin to slowly move and thrust against each other. Hands again explore, touch, caress. Their tongues dance between mouths, neither sure now where one ends and the other begins. The urgency of an impending orgasm begins to overtake Daniel, and he thrusts hard and faster against Miles, holding him tighter, breathing hard even as they kiss. Sensing this, Miles pulls his head back and gently nips at Daniel's lip, getting his attention. "I'm not done with you yet, you big handsome bear. It isn't time to cum yet." "Oh Miles, please, it feels so good, I'm so close, please..." "Oh no, none of that, let me go you brute." Still thrusting, Daniel relaxes his arms, and Miles again crawls down his body, showering him with kisses along his torso even as their cocks spring free. With a moan, Daniel places his hands on Miles' head, holding him, pressing it close, but allowing the freedom of movement Miles wants. He works down Daniel's chest, across his stomach, pausing to swirl his tongue in the deep naval, and works his way to Daniel's waist, where he nibbles at Daniel's pubic hair, his beard rubbing across Daniel's sensitive cock. Knowing how close Daniel is, Miles works his way around Daniel's cock and find his balls, which he ravishes with his tongue, as his hands caress the inside of Daniel's thighs. Being brought so close to orgasm then denied that release, each touch is more intense for Daniel. He has never experienced this, always before the object was to cause a partner to orgasm then be done. It is as if Miles knows where each spot on Daniel's body is that will bring pleasure, and is touching them one by one, coaxing the most out of each. As he moans in pleasure, Daniel doesn't resist or wonder as Miles places hands under his knees and lifts, spreading his legs wide. Miles slowly move his mouth beneath Daniel's balls, and carefully licks at the perineal skin, that tender line between the bottom of the balls and the ass, and Daniel gasps, arching his back in pleasure and amazement, his throbbing cock spitting large amounts of precum now. Slowly, softly, Miles run his tongue back and forth, covering the area with saliva, which runs down, pooling in Daniel's crack. Lifting Daniel's legs higher, Miles lets his tongue roam further and further, running over the furry ass cheeks in front of him, then gently up and down the deep crack. Hearing nothing but appreciation, he presses in deep, trailing saliva, slowly exploring the intimate area, until he feels the large body shudder and decides it is time for release. Oh so slowly he moves his tongue back up lightly over the perineal area, then lightly tickles the hairs on Daniel's balls before slowly running it up the underside of Daniel's throbbing cock. "Aaaaaaahhhh Miles, oh Miles ..." Releasing Daniel's knees, Miles swirls his tongue around the head of Daniel's cock, lapping up the precum; and at the same time takes a finger and runs it up and down Daniel's furry crack, spreading the saliva, finding Daniel's hole and rubbing it. "Oh geez Miles, no one has ever played with my butt like that before, oh that feels good." Panting, Daniel spreads his legs wider, pressing his ass down, and Miles' finger slowly penetrates the virgin ass. At the same time, Miles swallows more and more of Daniel's cock, running his tongue over the edges of the head and then down the shaft. Daniel squirms; the intense pleasure Miles' mouth is giving him easing the momentary discomfort of the invasion of his ass, relaxing with the slow pace Miles is setting, adjusting. He feels Miles' warm breath in his pubic hair and then his nose; his hot mouth tight around Daniel's cock which eventually nudges into Miles' throat. He feels Miles' finger reach deep inside him, spreading him, making him feel full, the pain fading and turning pleasant. Miles starts to bob his head slowly up and down on Daniel's cock, leaving his finger still at first, then slowly moving it, merging the rhythm, pressing deeper into Daniel as his mouth moves off Daniel's cock, then as he swallows again pulling his finger back. Eventually, pleasure firmly takes over, and with each thrust of Miles' finger Daniel's cock spurts more precum. As Daniel's hands reach down to hold Miles' head to him while he thrusts into Miles' mouth and then back onto his finger, Miles carefully inserts a second finger into the now relaxed hole, sending Daniel beyond the point of no return. "Aaaahhh I'm cumming, Miles please don't stop, oh baby please don't stop" groans Daniel, expecting Miles to release his cock, but instead, Miles sucks even harder. "OOOOOOHHHHH MILES!" Orgasm takes Daniel, and he shoots hard, spurt after spurt of cum flowing into Miles' mouth to be savored and swallowed, his ass convulsing, tightening around Miles' fingers with each spurt then relaxing, over and over again. Daniel cums and cums, a longer and harder orgasm than he remembers ever experiencing. Again he shudders as the orgasm releases him, breathing hard, sweating. Miles' gently removes his fingers, and Daniel feels empty. Daniel reaches down and urges Miles back up his body into a hug, holding him yet again, kissing him, tasting himself. He feels Miles' still hard cock pressed between them, and realizes that for the first time he wants a man inside him, this man. Lifting his legs, wrapping them around Miles' waist, he softly asks "Miles, will you fuck me? Please?" "Are you sure? You don't have to..." "Ssshhhh" whispers Daniel, quieting him with another kiss. "Please." With that, Miles lifts himself a bit, repositioning his body, and rubs the head of his cock up and down Daniel's crack, all the while looking into Daniel's eyes for any sign that this isn't what he wants. Seeing instead a need, a desire, Miles carefully presses himself at Daniel's entrance, still loose from his fingers, and feels the head of his cock pop beyond Daniel's rim. Seeing the look of pain cross his lover's face as this much larger object enters, Miles almost backs out. "Please Miles, I want you so much, please." So Miles holds still, again letting the muscles adjust, and begins softly kissing Daniel's neck, whispering encouragement, caressing him with his hands, and he feels Daniel relax again. He slowly and gently presses himself in, never too quickly to cause more discomfort, more concerned with Daniel than with his own pleasure. Sooner than either would have thought, Miles finds himself hilted deeply inside Daniel, and again rests and holds still. Seeing Daniel relax, he rolls his hips slightly, not thrusting, just adjusting his angle, and Daniel gasps, pain now fully converted into pleasure, as Miles' cock nudges then gently rubs against his prostate. Without thinking, he slowly thrusts his own hips, causing the head of Mile's cock to rub inside him, feeling each vein as it runs along his ring. "Oh Daniel, that feels so good. Baby, you have such a hot ass, it is so hard to go slow." Daniel squeezes and then relaxes his ass muscles around Miles, milking precum from Miles, adding more lubrication. "Take me, Miles, please, fill me." Miles starts pumping with a slow steady rhythm, but the foreplay has readied him for more, and he is hard pressed to hold himself back. However, soon Daniel is thrusting back at him, helping control the pace, his grunts becoming moans, and soon both have lost control. Miles rams his cock faster and harder into Daniel, and Daniel reaches up and pulls Miles to him, forcing him deeper, locking him in a kiss. Holding tight to Daniel, no rhythm to his thrusts now, only need, Miles' own orgasm overtakes him and he loses himself in it and the warm presence of the man with him. Feeling Miles shudder over him, feeling the warmth of Miles' cum fill him, Daniel experiences a new contentment, a satisfaction unlike what he had felt before. Miles breaths heavily, held in Daniel's arms, feeling Daniel's kisses across his face, and relaxes. Slowly recovering, Miles sighs and eventually starts to gently return Daniel's kisses. A smile spreads across his face as he feels something hard pressing against him. "I guess I don't need to wonder if you really liked it, I'll take that poking you are doing as approval." A blush spreads across Daniel's face, and he chuckles. "I don't know what to say, this hasn't happened before." "Heh, it's a good thing, don't be embarrassed!" "Well, thank you, it was wonderful; I still can't believe how good it felt." "First, you're welcome. Second, thank you, it was great, more than great. Third, if you are really ready to go again, it's time you returned the favor, you big hot bear." "Miles, you don't have to ..." "I think the quote is "Ssshhhhh, please, I want you so much." And I do want you Daniel." Truth to be told, the fucking he had received had indeed excited Daniel again, unlike his previous experiences where it was always play once and go. His legs were a little stiff from being wrapped around his lover, but he had never been that limber, and it was in a good way. Shifting his weight, he rolls them both over, bending his knees and arms enough to support some of his weight instead of fully pressing down on Miles. "Mmmmm, that feels good, you over me. I can take your weight, you know." "I weigh a lot more than you." "Not that much. C'mon, I can take it." But with that, Daniel pushes himself up on all fours, leaning in to kiss Miles to quiet him. "I won't break ..." Miles whispers after the kiss is broken. "I know, I just need to go slow, give me time. Besides, it's time for you to roll over." With that, Daniel raises himself up to a kneeling position, legs still spread on either side of Miles, and gently nudges him until he has rolled over to lay flat on his stomach, before again lowering himself to all fours, letting his furry chest press against Miles' shoulder blades, his stomach press against the small of Miles' back. Carefully pinning the shorter but sturdy man beneath him, he begins to slowly kiss the back of his lover's neck, then across his shoulder blades. Daniel's lips are soft, his tongue gently caressing, enough pressure not to tickle but to provide pleasure. He is in no rush, having already cum. He hears a sign beneath him, feeling the warm fuzzy body relax, and again feels something inside himself which is unfamiliar, more than a desire to give and receive physical satisfaction, but also a need to protect yet also give himself over and be protected. He moves his body down, letting his fur rub along Miles' back, drawing his tongue down Miles' spine. He lingers in the small of Miles' back, kissing, licking, while his hands softly caress Miles' ass cheeks. Pushing himself up, he lets his fingers gently run across them, eliciting squirming. "You know, your butt is as good looking naked as it is in those jeans of yours." He leans down before a response can be made, and runs his tongue over the hairs of one cheek then the other, hearing a gasp of surprise then pleasure. Softly, repetitively, he kisses each side, stroking the hairs lightly with his fingers at the same time, as Miles instinctive lifts his ass a bit, inviting more. He explores the crack with his tongue, wetting the fur, letting the moisture from his licking run deep down, then slowly spreads the cheeks apart and presses his face between them. Still in no hurry, he runs his tongue in circles around the rosebud buried within, circling but not touching. "Oh Daniel, that is so nice ..." Miles says breathily. With that, Daniel starts to flick his tongue directly over the sensitive skin of Miles' hole, not pushing, just touching, lapping at it over and over. His hands gently knead the ass cheeks, massaging them as he holds them apart. His licking becomes more insistent, and he works around the rim then presses against it, trailing more saliva, feeling his tongue sink in. He moves his face, his beard brushing the soft skin, causing more groaning and another push backwards, which allows his tongue to slide completely within Miles. Daniel takes to kissing now, his tongue dancing inside Miles' ass much as it had in his mouth, moving back and forth, caressing the soft inner walls, his lips moving over the outer nerves. Eventually moving up to his knees again, he looks down at the man laying out before him, a broad furred back, ass slightly raised, face turned to the left with his eyes closed and his mouth partially open. As he positions his cock at the moist relaxed entrance awaiting him, he feels not only anticipation for the physical pleasure, but a wave of emotion. Not just a desire to pleasure and be pleased, not just a desire to be careful and not to hurt, but more, a desire to be inside this man as a sharing, just as he had felt Miles inside him earlier - a sharing of pleasure rather than just an exchange of it, and a sharing of more. All this went through Daniel's mind in a flash, then he gently pressed forward, penetrating slowly, listening carefully for sounds of pain or discomfort, amazed at the feeling as the head of his cock pops beyond Miles' rim, the ring tightly gripping him yet seeming to pull him further. He holds himself back, savoring the moment, before he pushes again, sinking deeper. He hears Miles suck in his breath, and starts to pull back. "Don't stop, don't stop. Please don't stop. Damn you're wide, but don't stop." Instead of pushing in further, he slowly lowers his body down, again covering Miles from head to foot, holding some of his weight on knees and elbows. He pushes his hands under Miles chest, holding him, and starts to kiss him gently again. He allows more of his weight to push down, and hears a deep sigh before Miles relaxes even more completely. There is no resistance now and Daniel pushes again, this time penetrating smoothly until the front of his balls rest against the back of Miles' balls. Holding Miles to his chest, feeling the warm body secure beneath his own, feeling the hot tight pressure around his cock, he groans in delight and need. He rests for a moment, teasing himself with the desire to move, being sure Miles is ready, then carefully begins to pump his hips. His thrusts start slowly, gently, the saliva he had used for lubricant joined more and more with precum, allowing him to slide even more easily. Miles begins to move his hips as well, meeting each thrust, and Daniel picks up the pace, moving faster and harder. Time is at a stand still. Instincts take over, and Daniel's thrusts press Miles against the bed, moving him back and forth each time. They moan in unison and Daniel's cock throbs. He moves his hands, rearing upright, and finds himself roaring loudly in pleasure as his orgasm overtakes him. He pushes himself deep with each spurt of cum, and feels Miles' ass spasm and contract around him. Finally with one last thrust, he sinks back down, again wrapping his arms tight around Miles, panting. Daniel nuzzles his face against Miles' neck, breathing deep, taking in the masculine scent. After catching his breath, he rolls to his side, drawing Miles with him, pulling him close, spooning against him, feeling himself soften and slip out of Miles, yet still feeling connected. "Miles, that was unbelievable." "Sure was, Daniel, you're an amazing lover." "Miles, that's you ..." "Ok, ok we are both amazing. Who would've thought you could make me cum by fucking me, especially after I'd just cum?" "You came again? Really?" "Yeah, the proof is right there on your sheets. I told you that you're amazing." Before they could really settle the matter, both stomachs start to growl (after all, a pair of bears playing can work up a hefty appetite), and together they laugh, still at complete ease with each other. Looking at the clock, it's already past noon. After a not so quick kiss, Daniel gets out of bed to prepare lunch, tossing on the discarded shorts and a t-shirt, to be followed soon thereafter by Miles, who has put the robe back on. "You know Daniel, I was going to say you didn't need the shorts and shirt for my sake, but you look really good that way too." "Ha, it's not just modesty. Without the clothes, you might be flossing as you eat with how hairy I am." "True, I like the hair better on you than on my plate." They both laugh, and Miles walks up and hugs Daniel from behind. Soon, they sit to a simple but hearty lunch of sandwiches and homemade chicken vegetable soup. "I hope the soup is ok. I usually make big batches and store part. It never lasts as long as it is supposed to, I eat it too fast." "It's delicious. Soup gets better after it sits a bit I think." Soon they fall into an easy conversation over foods they liked to cook and foods they liked to eat, places they have eaten and places they would like to eat. They linger over lunch, but eventually decide a shower is in order. "You can shower first Miles, I'll just take care of the dishes." "The dishes can wait. I've been in your shower, remember? I know there is room for two." ******************************** The shower is an eye opening experience for Daniel as well. Instead of being a sexual romp, it is a time to relax, explore, and enjoy each other without pressure. In the hot steaming shower, Miles gently shampooed his hair, massaging his scalp as he stood in front of him, pressed together, pulling his face down for a long slow kiss after the suds had been rinsed out while the water ran over their bodies; taking the soap and slowly lathering his entire body, taking the time to appreciate every bit of it, going down on his knees to washes legs and then feet. No part was left untouched. Then it was Daniel's turn, and he slowly did the same for Miles, his fingers luxuriating in the long soft hair as he shampooed and rinsed, caressing arms and chest and buttocks and legs as he lathered. Seeing everything that before was but a blur during their intense sexual experience, realizing how truly attractive they find each other's body. Sated from their previous endeavors, neither felt a need or urgency for more, finding the comfort and intimacy satisfying and fulfilling. After turning off the water, they gently towel each other, enjoying the wet fur and then smoothing it down to dry it, kissing whenever face to face. Daniel finally retrieved Miles' clothes from the drier, and they sat in the living room and watched as the plows finished clearing the snow over tea and snacks. They traded more of their lives' stories, discovering how much more there was to learn about each other despite their time discussing books, how different they were yet how alike they were as well. It was not a fast process, as each was intensely interested in the other and asked questions throughout. Before they knew it, it began to darken outside as the earlier winter twilight set in. "Daniel, I hate to say it, but I really should get going. I can still catch the bus." Daniel laughed. "Oh no, we aren't doing that again. I hate to see you go, though I understand. But, you will let me drive you home." "Daniel, we've been over this before ..." "You'd better believe I'll pin you down before you walk out that door to the bus, Miles. I won't take no for an answer." "Daniel ..." Miles said, ready to dig in his heals. "Please, Miles, I've had such a great time, but if you take the bus, I will worry and I will feel bad. I really want to be able to just drive you home and know you are there safe. Please." Miles sighs. "Ok, but you don't need to feel that way." "I can't stop how I feel. Please." Miles laughs. "I said ok, but damn you are cute when you ask like that!" Daniel fakes a growl, and then wraps Miles in a big bear hug. After several peaceful moments, they separate and get their coats on. They scrape the frost off the windows of the car as it warms up, and talk during the short uneventful ride to Miles' apartment, Miles' hand resting on Daniel's thigh the entire time. "Would you like to come up and make sure I'm in ok?" Miles says with a wink. "No no, I won't overdo it. But thanks." "Thank you, Daniel, for everything." Miles leans over for a quick kiss, then opens the car door and heads up to his apartment. As the building door closes, Daniel turns the car around and heads back home in silence. ******************************** Sunday dawns, crisp and clear. Daniel stretches in bed, a creature of habit, waking up at his normal time. Laying there, he realized how his routine is not as consistent any more, how he even neglected his Saturday library visit, and finds he doesn't mind. Still in bed, he thinks back over the previous day, smiling, happy. As the day goes on, Daniel falls into his usual Sunday schedule. He further considers these new developments, and eventually his smile fades. It occurs to him then and there that he is alone, that his solitude is not all there is, and finds that at this moment he is not content with that. But this is outside his experience, and he is unsure how to proceed. "How has sex confused me so? Come on Daniel, get over it" he thinks. But this is unlike anything he has felt before. With a start, realization strikes him, that for him, what he has done is make love rather than having sex, a sharing of himself with someone he cares for. "But, Miles can't feel the same; he has lots of friends and things to do. This can't be anything but my imagination, and I won't risk our friendship with something so silly" Daniel tells himself firmly, convinced that this must be like the encounters he has had before. He focuses again on his routine life, doing his laundry, but suddenly smelling Miles in the sheets. He prepares meals ahead for the week that need to simmer or stew, and while making soup thinks of Miles with a spoon in hand enjoying the aroma of the savory broth. Vacuuming, he sees the footprints left by Miles' wet feet as he came in dripping on Friday night. That night, when he finally falls asleep, it is while hugging a pillow to his chest, feeling it warm against himself, and dreams of Miles spooning up against him. Daniel's Monday at work goes by as always, steady and smooth. He is still busy, his co-workers are friendly and they still chat about life's happenings - but Daniel feels removed, reluctant to share his weekend, merely smiling pleasantly and nodding as they talk about snowball fights with their kids and eventual holiday travel plans. His ride home is silent, and he stops by the library to drop off his stack of books and pick up those on hold. He has a pleasant conversation with Joy, who is glad to see he is well. Finally arriving home, he finds a box at his front door. "This is odd; I didn't order anything that I can think of." Opening it at the kitchen counter, he discovers that it is a box of homemade cookies, with a note which brings both a large smile and then a single tear running down his cheek. "Thank you for rescuing me, my handsome Saint Bear-nard! Not just from the snow and cold, but from being lonely and not even realizing it. Call and let me know if you are free to meet before book club on Saturday." Having to hold himself back from rushing to the phone, Daniel takes a deep breath and then calls, and soon finds himself in a relaxed yet delightful conversation. Miles suggests that bowling that Wednesday would be a good idea. At first Daniel shies away as this is something he hadn't done since he was a child. "I'm no good at bowling." "This isn't professional, it's just for fun." "I don't know." "Oh, come on." "No, really, I'm sure I'm no good." "We're going." "Maybe I could just keep score." "It's automatic scoring. Trust me, you'll have fun." Arriving at the same time at the bowling alley, Miles is waving a people he knows, and Daniel smiles. They get shoes and bowling balls, and head to a lane. Then, they laugh together when Daniel gutters on his first ball. Daniel is surprised, because instead of cringing inside because he didn't do well and feeling defensive, he just goes with the flow as he is enjoying the company. This laughter isn't the teasing he learned to defend against before, but a mutual response, laughing with each other instead of being laughed at. Then, Miles comes up behind him and helps him hold the ball right and shows him how to throw it properly, and Daniel feels warm inside as Miles further encourages and praises him with each attempt. The warmth isn't fireworks, those come later, but something just as good - companionship and caring, suggestions without criticism, someone else proud of his improvement. ******************************** The weeks go by as they always do, and they find numerous activities both in and out of the bedroom, always building on their friendship and affection. The ebb and flow of Daniel's life has changed, but it becomes as steady and smooth as before, the current sometimes flowing around new experiences but consistent in his joy at being with Miles. He begins to understand that having a partner doesn't take away from what he was, but enhances it and adds new aspects. ******************************** It has been almost a year since they met, and Daniel and Miles are sitting by the river on Saturday afternoon, dangling their feet in the water. If flows over their toes, first one's foot then the other, cool and refreshing. The sound of the water is quiet and soothing, and they speak in low voices, relaxed. "Miles, can I ask you something?" "Of course." "Promise not to be offended, even if it is a silly idea." "I promise Daniel," say Miles, rolling his eyes "but it won't be silly." "Well, I know you like to be independent. But, well, I know your lease is up, and well, I was thinking maybe you, uh, well, maybe you'd think about moving in to my place instead of renewing it?" "Daniel, I can take care of myself ..." "I know, I know, it is just a silly idea ..." "Let me finish" says Miles, holding a finger to Daniel's lips. "I was going to say, I can take care of myself, but with you, I don't feel I always have to. To be honest, I was thinking the same thing, but wasn't sure you'd want to give up your alone time." "When I'm alone, I think of you. You give me my space even when we are together. I love you, Miles." "I love you too, Daniel" whispers Miles, leaning in and kissing him. They discuss the matter further, and both agree that it seems natural for Miles to move in. ******************************** When the time for the move finally arrives, they unpack, with the library giving way to a combination library and music room, Daniel watching as things are rearranged and settled in new places. The room becomes full, as has his heart. For Daniel, life is good. He is content, and complete.