Date: Thu, 6 Jun 2002 00:44:45 -0400
From: Sequoyah <sequoyah@charter.net>
Subject: Aaron and Andreas 1

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				Disclaimer

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either
are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and
any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments,
events or locales is entirely coincidental.

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			     Author's Comments

This story is the outgrowth of an event which resulted in a very long
story, A Special Place, and its parallel sequels, The Concord Five and The
Oberlin Five, although it has no direct connection to those. A Special
Place was written at the request of a gay student who said, "Doc, you ought
to write a story which includes the things you have told us and we have
talked about," us being gay students for whom I was a shoulder to cry on, a
counselor and, most importantly, friend. One afternoon, I found myself
imagining what might have been the story of that young man's
acknowledgement of his sexuality. "Aaron and Andreas" is the result of that
imagining. It is in no way the real story of that young man's life. It is
pure fiction. It is, however, presented in tribute to him. This is for you,
D, with thanks wherever you are. May the gods smile on you.

Sequoyah


If you liked this story, you might enjoy A Special Place, posted on
Nifty-High School and at http://go.to/gaywritersguild. A note is always
appreciated: sequoyah@charter.net.


			     Andreas and Aaron

The next few weeks were very strange with getting used to a new job and
having someone in my apartment. Andreas was certainly no trouble--in fact,
he was often a real help. So long as I gave him some indication of what he
could prepare for dinner, it was done. He was an excellent cook and very
creative. We had picked up the table and chairs from Ralph, but Andreas
insisted on removing his work from the table at dinner. I did insist he
leave it there when he was doing a project that required a large,
multi-colored chart. It took longer to get it out and put it away than he
had to work on it.

Thursday evening after Andreas had been at my place for three weeks, Jerry
called to say he had the weekend off and asked if I was free for that
mountain hike I had missed. I told him I was not working weekends--well one
every month or so. "I think so. I'm sure Andreas can make it without me."

"Bring him along. Susan has been hounding me about her going. With her
along, the pace should be slow enough for Andreas."

"I'll ask him. I don't want to force him into anything. What's your mom
going to say about extra bodies?"

"She'll probably raise hell because we haven't been up before. Guess we
need to take both our vehicles in case either of our significant others
needs to come back."

"Vehicles? Jerry, you sound like a policeman," I laughed. "And what's this
about significant others? You have one, but I don't think I have unless
someone is hiding something from me."

"Well, maybe someone is. Anyway, how about it? Why don't you bring the city
boy along?"

"I'll give you a call as soon as I talk with Andreas. And, Jerry, I don't
mind kidding, but how about no more comments about significant others? It
suggests something which is not true and could do great harm, especially to
Andreas."

"Sorry, Aaron. I know better, but you'll have to admit he is one
good-looking dude."

"If you say so, Jerry." After I hung up, I thought about what Jerry had
said. Joking? I wondered. After all, Ms. Allen had kinda made the same
suggestion. I knew I was pretty mixed-up in my own mind--or was I just
pretending, hiding? From whom? From myself? One thing for damn sure, any
suggestion that Andreas was anything other than a young man I was providing
with food and shelter would probably cost me my job, any relationship with
Andreas, and God only knows what else. Jerry had to know that. And I had
better watch my step.

Andreas had insisted on doing some laundry and I insisted he not lug a huge
basket of clothes downstairs and back up. "You have been told about
lifting," I reminded him. He was right when he said the clothes weighed
less than one of his school books--of course they are massive these days.
He came back upstairs with a basket of clean, neatly folded clothes shortly
after I had talked to Jerry. When he walked in I asked him, "How'd you like
to spend the weekend in the north Georgia mountains?".

"The land of 'Deliverance'** and good old-boy rednecks? Think I'll pass on
that."

"Just prejudice. You racist, Boy?" I asked him in my best bro accent.

"Yeah, I am very prejudiced about staying in one piece after I've just been
put back together."

I then told Andreas about Jerry and his family. "Jerry and his family have
been a real family to me and I love going to the mountains. Jerry promises
easy hiking since his fiancee is going along. It's beautiful this time of
year and if anyone tries to get out of line, Mrs. Coghill will handle it."
I told Andreas about Edward almost using the "N" word and what happened.
Andreas got so tickled he ended up with tears in his eyes. I think more
because he had been so on edge emotionally and was not able to start
working through the mess he had been in.

"I guess if Mrs. Coghill is there for protection, this black boy would be
safe as Moses in his basket," Andreas laughed. "Sure I'd like to."

"You're going to need hiking boots. Your fancy Nikes just won't do." I
started to give Andreas money and tell him what brands to look for and to
make sure the ones he chose were properly fitted, but there was still time
to get the boots. We went to an outfitters and got the boots. Andreas was
surprised at the cost. "I thought only Nikes cost an arm and a leg."

"The big difference is these, with proper care, will be good years from
now." Andreas wore the boots home and I suggested he wear them to school
Friday. "Not a real break-in, but enough to show up any problem," I told
him.

"Aaron, I can't just keep taking money off of you. I've got to get a job
and help pay my way."

"Not a very smart idea, Kiddo. The smart idea is for you to keep up your
schoolwork and have a little fun. A job would be too much right now. You
are going to have to think long term."

"So are you. This can't go on forever."

"It won't. You'll be making money this summer and maybe have a job next
fall, depending on how college turns out, but don't worry about money right
now. You have more important things to worry about." What I didn't tell
Andreas was that the boots were the last big purchase he would be making
because I had gotten into the maxed-out credit cards trap a year or so ago,
and when I got out vowed never to do that again. I still used a card, but
it was paid off every month unless I had to make a major purchase, and then
it got paid off in two months. If I couldn't pay for it in two months, I
went without. Andreas being with me didn't cost a whole lot more but, of
course, the utilities and food bills had increased. But he would never know
that.

I called Jerry and told him we both would be going to the mountains. "Why
don't we meet at my place? Even though we're taking your truck and my Jeep,
we can go together."

"Fine. Think you can be ready by 5:30?"

"Probably, but why don't we grab a bite to eat and miss some of the rush
hour. We'll be going up 575 and you know that's a parking lot until 7:30 or
8:00. We'll get to your place about the same time if we leave Atlanta at
8:00 as if we left at 5:30."

"Right as usual, Aaron, me lad," Jerry laughed. "Better yet, why don't I
have Susan whip up dinner at your place. She can get off work early with no
problem."

"YOU have SUSAN fix dinner?" I asked. Jerry was very much a mountain kind
of guy and always talked as though he was lord and master of his house. But
we all knew he was like his dad had been, very much at the beck and call of
his woman--not that either were henpecked, they just knew what they had
when they found a good woman. To tell the truth, I was surprised Jerry was
dating again because Linda had absolutely been his life. "I'll let Andreas
take the Jeep to school tomorrow and he can be back at my place by
4:00-4:30 and help out. He's a great cook. We have everything we need here
unless you want steaks."

"You know I want steak! I'll pick them up when I get off in the morning and
bring them over. Susan can just meet me there." I had forgotten Jerry was
still on the night shift.

"Say, Bro, why don't you get your things together tonight then come here
from work? You can get in your beauty sleep and we'll have dinner and then
roll."

"Sounds good. By the way, have you added Andreas to your vehicle insurance?
If not, you best."

"I'll take care of it tonight." When I hung up, I looked up the 800 number
and called and had Andreas added to my insurance. An eighteen-year-old male
cost a bundle, but being an honors student got a big discount for him and
the fact that he was the secondary driver helped as well. That finished, I
told Andreas the plan. He was hesitant about taking the Jeep, but I assured
him it was ok.

Friday was uneventful to say the least. In police work, you kinda hope a
day is uneventful, but it sure makes it long. At 4:00 Ralph said, "Let's
call it a week". We went back to headquarters, turned in our reports and
were on our way. Ralph offered to take me home but it was out of his way,
so I suggested he just drop me off and I'd take MARTA.

Susan and Andreas had reached the apartment and had started fixing supper.
"A great cook you rounded up here," Susan said as I kissed her on the
cheek.

"Yeah, think I'll keep him." Andreas dried his hands, walked over and gave
me a hug, a habit he had started almost by the time he first walked in the
door. We had talked about it and he said he had always been starved for
affection and now that he had someone who didn't think hugging made you a
sissy, he was going to make up for lost time.

"Jerry still asleep?" I asked.

"I guess so, neither of us have been in the bedroom to see."

"How'd the boots do, Andreas?" I asked. In answer he held out a foot and
said they were fine. I hadn't noticed last night, but the kid's feet were
huge. "I wonder how many cows it took to make those," I joked.

"No cows, genuine water buffalo," I was told. "Dinner in twenty
minutes. Want a beer?"

"Not just a cook, Susan. He's my houseboy as well."

"Watch it with the boy stuff," Andreas said, attempting to appear insulted.
"Here's your beer." He handed me a frosty mug which was just what I needed.
When I finished my beer, I went into the bedroom and woke Jerry. I hate
people who wake up cheerful and Jerry was one of those.

"Think I'll shower and change before dinner," I said.

"I probably need to do the same. I had a rough night. There was a major
free-for-all at the Cheetah Club again. I swear, I think that place should
be closed down."

"Never happen because it brings in major income for the city from old
bald-headed guys, here for conferences, who go there and watch the bouncing
titties. Shower first? I can wait."

"Go ahead. I need to get awake and I'm not really."

After I showered and got dressed, I took down my backpack and put in things
for the weekend. When I went back into the living room I asked Andreas if
he had packed and he said he didn't know what to pack. "Take your school
stuff out of your backpack and throw in socks and underwear for two days,
jeans and jacket, shorts and T for hiking, depending on where we hike, and
other clothes for around Coghills' place. Have homework you need to do this
weekend?"

"No. Things are sorta winding down. Now that AP exams are over, physics,
calculus, English and chem are anticlimactic. We are just passing the time
in those. No homework for my photography and PE classes, although I'd like
to get some photos this weekend, but I forgot to get a throw-away camera."

"Know how to use a good one?" Susan asked.

"Yeah, sure do. Just never had one to use except at school."

"It's not too far out of the way to swing by my place. I have a great
camera and all the works which I never use. I got used to using a little
point-and-shoot one and since I just do snapshots, that's fine. So my good
outfit I got for high school graduation is just gathering dust. You can
keep it as long as you like."

"Great! Thanks a million!" Andreas said as he grabbed Susan and started to
swing her around. "I forget," he said, when I started to tell him to watch
it. "I'd like to take my sketching things as well. Is that ok?"

"Sure."

"Sounds like an art trip," Jerry said as he walked into the room. "Man, I
am starved."

"Dinner in a few minutes," Susan said as she kissed Jerry.

"Beer?" Andreas asked and, when Jerry nodded, poured one and handed it to
him.

Andreas had already set the table and, when the food was ready, he and
Susan put it on the table and we sat down. I kinda wondered what Andreas
would do about grace since it wasn't something Jerry and I had observed
except at his mom's place. As soon as he was seated, Andreas' head went
down and Jerry's was right behind his. Susan looked amused for a moment and
bowed her head as I did mine. "Good friends, good meat, good God, let's
eat. Amen." Andreas said.

"I'll say amen to all that, Andreas," Jerry said.

Susan was having beer with her dinner and Jerry and I had a second one.
Andreas had iced tea. The food was absolutely delicious and we enjoyed it
tremendously. Jerry and I cleaned up from dinner while Andreas got packed.
Since Susan lived only a few blocks away, she ran home and got the camera
outfit for Andreas and we were ready to go at seven.

We had a great drive to north Georgia after we left the metro Atlanta
traffic behind. The night was clear and it didn't get really dark until
after 8:00-8:30. There was a full moon so the countryside was bathed in
silvery light. When we entered the mountains, Andreas was captivated. I was
surprised the only time he had been outside Atlanta was when he was a young
kid and spent summers with his grandmother in Macon. She had died when he
was nine, so his memories were of over nine years ago. The last few years
he had gone to Macon, his grandmother was not up to going fishing with him
which he remembered her doing when he was younger.

Jerry and Susan were ahead of us and pulled off at a lookout. When the car
lights were turned off, our eyes gradually got used to the darkness. Even
well into the mountains, the glow of Atlanta's light could be seen on the
horizon, but there was no light where we were except the light of the moon
and stars. The mountains lay in row after row of peaks to the north, all
bathed in the natural light of the sky. No-one spoke for the longest time,
then I heard Andreas release his breath. "It is so beautiful," he said. "It
takes your breath away." Susan was standing beside Jerry and he had his arm
around her. As I stood, gazing across the mountains, I felt Andreas' arm
encircling my shoulders and it felt so very right.

Once again I wondered about my sexuality. Having been raised very much in
the black community, I asked myself, "Aaron, are you a candy-ass nigger?"
The answer to that was a definite no, but was I gay? I honestly didn't know
and didn't know what would change if I could/would ever answer yes. All I
knew at the moment was that Andreas' arm was around me, it felt so very
right and I had very strange feelings toward him, feelings which I dare not
express and which I better suppress.

"Beautiful, isn't it? Jerry asked softly. "One day I want to leave Atlanta
behind and come back to these mountains and I'd like for it to be before I
am old enough to retire."

"I don't think I'd like to live here all the time," I said. "As beautiful
and peaceful as it is, I am just a real city boy. I need the hustle and
bustle of the city to keep my blood flowing, but it sure is nice to be able
to get off the fast train now and then. How about you, Susan? Andreas?"

Susan was snuggled up against Jerry and was silent for a few minutes and
said, "Yeah, I wonder if I could live up here. Not sure I could, but if I
did, I'd have to make frequent trips to the city--the way you guys make
trips up here, but more often. Maybe I could get used to being here most of
the time, but I'm not sure. It's something Jerry and I are working on. I
hate to be this way, but it may be the one thing that breaks us up."

"Since this is my first time to really be out of the city--I mean really
out of any city--I'm just wandering along. It's sure beautiful but I think
I, like you, Aaron, need the bright city lights most of the time."

We all were silent again when Andreas cried out "WOW!" as he pointed to the
sky. I thought at first he was referring to the stars--you never, ever, see
stars in the city as you do in the mountains where there is little or no
artificial light--but as I was about to comment, I saw the last glimmer of
a shooting star.

"Your first shooting star?" I asked.

Andreas nodded. "I read about them, but didn't really believe there was
really anything called a shooting star."

"Make a wish?"

"I did remember that much. I sure did," he said as he turned to look at
me. I could see his eyes sparkling in the star and moon light and it did
things to me.

"We better get moving as we still have miles to go before we sleep," Jerry
said.

"Robert Frost, American poet," Andreas spoke as if he were on a quiz show.

"Correct," Susan said. "Poem?"

"'Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening'," my favorite, I think," Andreas
mused. "No, I think 'The Road Not Taken' is my favorite."

"You don't sound much like a basketball player," Susan said.

"Duh... like, you know, duh... what does a... you know, basketball, like
player... sound, you know, like?" Andreas said while almost drooling. Susan
cracked up and Jerry and I had a good laugh, as did Andreas.

When we were back in the Jeep, I said, "You keep surprising me Andreas. I
would never have thought you read poetry. I mean other than what you are
forced to read."

"Actually I got turned on to Frost when I was in the ninth grade. I was
assigned to do a report on him and really got into it. Later I read other
poets, but Frost remains one of my favorites--but I absolutely get carried
away by D. H. Lawrence. I like Langston Hughes among the African-American
poets, but not the usual stuff. Come to think of it, how does a cop know
poetry?"

"Kinda the same as you, but later. I did AP English, believe it or not."

"Why didn't you go to college, Aaron?"

"Lack of money--even with scholarships I had to have money for living
expenses. And after my girlfriend and mom both did themselves in with
crack, I felt that college was a waste of time since I had decided to go
into police work. It was not the worst decision I have made, but it was not
the best either. I took a few courses after I got out of the academy. I
want to do more. I don't know that I want to be a policeman all my life." I
soon became involved in my own thoughts and I suspect Andreas did as
well. We both fell silent and we rode into the night, I think very much in
tune with each other.

It was nearly 10:00 when we arrived at the Coghill home place. Mrs. Coghill
was waiting for us. She hugged all of us, including Andreas. "Andreas, if
you are a friend of Aaron's, you are welcome. He's kinda my darker son,"
she chuckled. "Leave your stuff," she said. "Come on in. The pie's
awaitin'." Mrs. Coghill always had apple pie and ice cream waiting for her
returning son and those he dragged in. Tonight the pie was still warm.
"Andreas, you still doing ok? Jerry told me you had the stuffing beat out
of you and got rescued by old Aaron."

"Yes, ma'am. Thanks to Aaron getting all the pieces to Grady in time, I got
put back together. Think I'm as good as new."

"Good! Well when you have finished with your pie and ice cream, you can get
your things and bring them inside. Susan, I don't know your sleeping
arrangements in Atlanta, but in my house I insist on a piece of paper
before there's any bed sharing. All the boys think I'm old fashion and they
are right. Jerry, put her in John's room. Joseph and Edward may be coming
in this week-end so, Andreas, if you don't mind sharing with Aaron, you two
can take the twins' room. I know they won't be coming in."

"Mom, if they object, I'm sure Susan and I won't mind sharing the twin's
room."

"I suspect that's at least true for you, but you know the rules, buddy
boy."

Since I had been to the Coghill place many times, I knew the house very
well. The Coghills, being all guys, shared a large bathroom. I guess Susan
would be shown the small bath in what was to have been a guest room until
every nook and cranny was occupied by a Coghill son.

"Mom, I think we better hit the bed. We've all had a full day and I'd like
to take a short hike before breakfast."

"Are you nuts, Jerry? Hike before breakfast?" Susan asked.

"You don't have to go. No-one does, but I want to get up to the cliffs
overlooking the river for the sunrise. Mom can get you up in time for
breakfast when we get back,"

"Thanks. I like that idea better."

After our good nights, we all went to our rooms.

Since Andreas moved in, I had been pretty careful to allow him privacy such
as when he was getting undressed for bed. We both had been sleeping in
boxers although I had slept in my birthday suit before his arrival. A
couple times I think he started to get into bed nude and remembered. At
least it seemed that way. Tonight we'd share a bathroom with Jerry. "Guess
we better just get dressed for bed and then do the bathroom bit," I said as
I started getting undressed. When Andreas stripped, I glanced up into a
mirror which displayed him in "full frontal nudity". The kid came with a
nice set of equipment I thought, and quickly realized what I was doing and
blushed. Dressed in boxers, we grabbed our toiletry bags and went to the
bathroom. Jerry was already there, brushing his teeth.

When he finished he said, "Andreas, I want to watch the sunrise in the
morning. The only disadvantage to that is we'll have to leave here about
four-thirty, quarter of five. Are you planning on coming, Aaron?"

"I hate the hour, but you know I'll be there. Andreas, I'll set the clock
in time for us to get up and get dressed and you can get up or not as you
please."

"To be honest, it would be a totally new experience for me. I don't ever
remember seeing a sunrise. I think I can crawl out of bed. We'll see."

After we got into bed, Andreas was asleep and snoring softly in no time at
all. I wasn't. I was really working myself into a mess about my sexuality.
My girlfriend and I had sex and it was great. In thinking back, that was
what it was, sex. I mean I liked her, but love? To be honest, I hadn't
loved her. Before she overdosed, we had stopped having sex. Not by her
choice, but by mine. I knew enough about the crack business to know that if
she needed to, she'd trade sex for crack and I had seen a high school
friend die from AIDS, the result of passing a needle around, and no sex was
good enough to make that a good trade.

I long ago admitted to myself that LaTonya turned me on a lot more than she
thought. Of course, she had hinted that I was gay so I guess she would miss
some of the erections she had given me just by being nice. But she had
hinted that she thought I was gay. So had Ms. Allen. Even Ralph had kinda
questioned me about it. I supposed I should have reacted one way or another
to the hints, but I didn't. I guess I didn't because I wasn't sure myself.
I do know one thing, when we were at the lookout tonight, I got a raging
hardon when Andreas just draped his arm over my shoulder. And a couple
times recently when he hugged me, I had a sudden and strong urge to kiss
the guy.

I guess I needed to talk to someone, maybe the department's shrink, but
that might put my job on the line or at least make it tough. I couldn't
talk to Andreas. I could, but it wouldn't be fair. He already thought he
owed me big time and, since he knew he was gay, he might feel obligated to
do something with me. I liked the kid a lot. I loved the kid as a big
brother should and it better stay that way for his sake. Obviously nothing
was going to get settled tonight and I finally drifted off to sleep.

When the alarm went off, I was very confused. I wasn't in my own bed and
for a moment I didn't know where I was. I was confused for only a moment
because Andreas immediately got me squared away when he groaned, "I hope to
hell a sunrise is going to be worth it".

We went to the bathroom, both sporting piss hards which were impossible to
hide. After a piss, we brushed our teeth, washed our faces and went back to
the room and got dressed. "I hope your boots are broken in enough. You did
wear them to school, right?"

"I should be earning a commission from all those sold this weekend because
of my wearing them," Andreas laughed. "They are going to be the latest fad
at Lakeshore."

Jerry came to our room and said, "Are the sleeping beauties ready for a
short walk? I have some coffee in a thermos and some energy bars for when
we reach the cliffs."

The three of us walked in silence, single file as the path was narrow.
Before we reached the cliffs, the roar of the river cascading over a series
of falls could be heard. Suddenly the path seemed to widen and Andreas,
walking ahead of me, was ready to charge ahead. I reached out and grabbed
his jacket and said, "Better slow down, Hoss, or your next step will be
into pure mountain air."

The path ended abruptly at the edge of the cliff, which was a couple
hundred feet above the river. The sky was quite light and the river visible
below. "WOW!" Andreas said, just as he had done last night. I remembered
the first time Jerry had brought me up here and that had been my reaction
as well. Jerry walked out to the edge of the huge shelf overhanging the
cliffs. I always got a strange feeling when I walked out to sit beside
him. Andreas seemed to have no fear of heights at all as he walked onto the
rock and sat down between my legs and draped his arms over them, pulling my
legs to himself.

Jerry opened the thermos, took three cups from his backpack and poured
coffee for us. He then handed us a couple energy bars and we sat, silent,
drinking our coffee and eating. The sky was gradually growing lighter and
suddenly the fingers of dawn shot into the sky, fingers of reds and
oranges.  Andreas' sudden intake of breath broke the stillness, which
before had been broken only by the sound of the river far below.

We sat for, I guess, half an hour, all in silence. Finally Jerry said,
softly, "I could be here every morning and never tire of the sunrise. Every
day it is different."

Andreas answered, almost in a whisper, "Thanks, Jerry, it sure was worth
the trip. Yeah, I think I could join you." And Andreas was definitely not a
morning person.

As we walked back to the house, unlike our trip up to the cliffs, we
talked. Jerry asked Andreas what he wanted to see while he was in the
mountains. Andreas responded he didn't know because he had never been
anywhere that wasn't inhabited. "The wildest place I have ever been is the
park," he said.

"And the wildest things there are the people," Jerry laughed, and Andreas
joined in his laughter. "Aaron, you have any suggestions for hiking?"

"Since we will have Susan and Andreas, it needs to be a hike for seeing,
not speed hiking."

"Yeah. I'll come up with something. Now I am ready for breakfast, one that
I don't have to cook."

"As I recall, that's the kind you usually have, a Waffle House special," I
said and Jerry laughed.

We were nearing the house and, like a horse, the closer to home he got, the
longer Jerry's strides became and the faster his walk. It was just 6:30
when we got back, ready for a shower and shave.

Ms. Coghill was busy cooking when we walked in the kitchen door. "You have
thirty minutes," she said as Jerry kissed her on the cheek.

"Susan up?"

"Don't think so," she replied. "Morning Aaron, Andreas. Sleep well?"

"Sure did and I'm starved," Andreas replied.

"I'll take care of that as soon as you take care of the shower and shave
bit."

As I said, the boys' bathroom was very large. There were two showers and
two basins on either side of the door and two toilets in stalls in a room
beyond the bath. Jerry headed straight to the toilet and closing the stall
door. Andreas and I shared the remaining toilet for a piss. I know it's
kinda hard to believe, but we had never seen each other nude. Well, thanks
to a mirror, I had seen Andreas last night. Andreas said, without
embarrassment, "Both pretty well-hung, I see". I blushed.

When Jerry came out of the toilet, I asked him how we should dress.
Sometimes when we were getting ready for a hike, Jerry would say, "Better
wear jeans," because we would need protection for our legs. At other times
it was definitely shorts and T's, especially in the summer. Of course late
April was not generally warm in north Georgia, but it seemed unusually warm
as we were walking back from the cliffs, especially for early morning.

"It's going to be a shorts and T's day," he responded. "If you want to make
sure, throw a light jacket in your backpack." Jerry was the only one with a
backpack for our predawn stroll, but everyone would be carrying one for the
day. Each of us would carry food and water--but if Jerry chose the right
route, there was a stream from which it was safe to drink, about half-way
to where we could eat lunch. Andreas, of course, was packing a camera bag
full of goods, so I offered to carry both our part of lunch. He accepted,
which was somewhat of a surprise since he usually asserted his
independence.

Andreas and I got dressed and went to the kitchen. "Need any help?" Andreas
asked Mrs. Coghill.

"Seems Jerry is hiding so you can do his job and set the table. Plates and
all up there," she said, pointing to a cabinet with the spatula she had in
her hand, "silver in that drawer," she said pointing again. "There'll be
six of us. Edward came in last night. Aaron, if you will fill water glasses
and get the napkins, we'll be ready when the latecomers arrive."

As she spoke, a finer-featured version of Jerry walked into the room,
dressed in shorts and a T, barefooted. It was Edward. He, as all the
Coghill boys, had their mother's coloring--dark, dark brown eyes, dark
complexion, black hair. Some of the boys had curly hair, some straight.
Edward was definitely from the curly side of the family. His longish hair
framed his face in curls. He had his dad's height and build, over six feet,
and had a well-defined body which was lean and clean. Jerry told me when he
got to high school some of the bullies took him on, thinking his lack of
sheer bulk meant he was a weakling. "They learned otherwise and often had
to apologize from the ground, and word got around quickly," he had said.

"Good to see you, Edward," I said. "This is a stray I picked up off the
street," I said, pointing to Andreas. "Andreas Jackson, Edward Coghill."
The two shook hands.

"This is a surprise," Edward said. "Andreas Jackson was just picked up off
the street or did you kidnap him so you can get ransom from the NBA?" he
laughed. "Saw you in the State All-Star game," Edward said. "You're
awesome."

Andreas smiled and said, "Thanks."

Susan and Jerry finally arrived and we all sat down at the table. "Edward,"
Mrs. Coghill said, and Edward said grace.

The table was loaded with biscuits, hot country sausage, scrambled eggs and
fried apples. "Andreas, you need to know the sausage is great, but
definitely pepper hot and I don't know whether you have ever had fried
apples or not. I hadn't the first time I came, but if you have or haven't
you are in for a treat. But even better will be next fall when apples are
fresh."

We all fell to eating and there was little talk for a few minutes, then
everyone kinda slowed down. "Edward, how much longer before you are home
for the summer?" Jerry asked.

"I finish in three weeks. Not sure I will be home though. I'm giving some
thought to going to summer school. I want to get more of the hard stuff out
of the way before I transfer to Emory next fall. I have already been
accepted and, with summer school, I would be an advanced sophomore when I
get to Atlanta."

"What's your major?" Andreas asked.

"I'm taking a liberal studies program which is designed as pre-law. I hope
to go to Emory School of Law. Where are you headed next year?" Edward
asked.

"Not sure. I have scholarship offers from Tech, Emory and Georgia State.
Tech is a basketball scholarship. I guess if I could be sure I'd make the
NBA, I'd take it for the money, but sooner or later I'd like to get into
medicine and if I got in the NBA, I'd probably be too old to get accepted
to med school. I'm still not sure. Then, well, my basketball career may be
over. Tech expected me to sign with them a month ago, but I couldn't make
up my mind. Now, I don't know..." Andreas didn't say why his career may be
over and I said nothing.

"Must be good to have options," Edward said.

"Need I remind you, you would have had options had you not thought partying
was what high school was for," Mrs. Coghill said.

"Mom," Edward whined.

"It's true," Jerry said. "But, Mom, he really did a turnaround before his
senior year in high school and this year in college, a turnaround that
Emory recognized and accepted him. I'm proud of him."

"So am I," Mrs. Coghill said. "But he needs to remember why his options
were limited."

"So what are you up to this weekend, Edward?" Jerry asked.

"Nothing, I guess. I just wanted to get away before I get in the final exam
rat race. Why? You have a suggestion?"

"We had planned on a hike today but, with you here, we could pack enough
stuff for an overnight. Anyone interested?"

"You mean out in the woods with bears and tigers and stuff?" Andreas
asked. I looked at him expecting to see a smile on his face but, when I
looked, he wasn't kidding.

"Yeah, and the guys from 'Deliverance' as well," Edward laughed. Andreas
blushed and got a shy grin on his face. "I take it you have spent most of
your life in the city."

"Yeah, I spent some time in summers with my grandmother in Macon and we
went fishing some, but that was practically in the town."

"You'll be in less danger from wild animals in the mountains than you are
from the wild people in Atlanta."

"You expect me to go off into the woods when there are a flush toilet and
hot shower here? No, thank you," Susan said.

"Ah, Susan, you don't want to be a spoilsport," Jerry said.

"Look, Jerry, I like it here at your mom's place. I'd like to have a get
away place here in the mountains. That doesn't mean I'm interested in the
outdoors: roughing it, hiking and all that sort of thing. No, thank you!"

"Ah, Susan," Jerry was sounding like a kid begging a parent.

"Jerry, you can come back later and you men can camp out. Susan doesn't
want to. You brought her up expecting a hike, not a camp-out," Mrs. Coghill
chided Jerry.

"I can go back to Atlanta," Susan offered.

"Nah, I just thought since Edward was here, it would be a good time. We can
come back later," Jerry said, but I had known Jerry long enough and we had
been close enough for me to see he wasn't as at ease with the situation.
"Edward, want to go along? Easy hike to High Falls, lunch and Eagle's Nest
for the sunset."

"You're walking back in the dark? That's an adventure if you know the way,"
Mrs. Coghill said.

"Nah, I thought Aaron and I could drive up to Eagle's Nest and leave his
Jeep and drive back here. Then after the sunset, we could all come back in
the Jeep."

"Sounds like a winner to me," Edward said. "What are we waiting for?"

"For you to help Mom clean up after breakfast and get lunch packed while
Aaron and I take the Jeep to Eagle's Nest."

"Ok, let's get on it, Edward," Andreas said as he got up and started
clearing the table.

"I can clean up," Mrs. Coghill said.

"No doubt," Andreas said, giving her his brightest, double-dimple smile.
"Edward and I probably won't do it as well, but we'll do it."

"Then I'll start getting a lunch together," Mrs. Coghill said.

"Tell me what to do and I'll help," Susan said.

Jerry and I drove to a clearing near Eagle's Nest, parked the Jeep and
drove back to the house. Jerry was uncharacteristically silent. I started
to ask him what was wrong, but decided against it for two reasons. First, I
knew what was wrong and second, he knew me well enough to talk to me if he
wanted to.

When we reached the house, Andreas and Edward were running around like two
young puppies at play. It was refreshing to see Andreas so relaxed, not
that he had been withdrawn or anything. He had broken down and cried a few
times when he was telling me something about his life before and after he
had been put on the street, but generally he had seemed ok. Watching him
now, I wondered.

Susan and Mrs. Coghill had packed a picnic lunch, which had been
distributed among backpacks belonging to the males. Susan had a practically
empty backpack, I guess just her light jacket and nothing else. Jerry
handed her a first aid kit which she placed in her pack and we were off,
Jerry and Susan holding hands leading the way, and me bringing up the
rear. Andreas and Edward were still acting like young puppies darting off
the trail here and there, Andreas with Susan's camera at ready. We hiked at
a lively clip for a half hour without stopping. When we reached an
outcropping overlooking a deep valley, Jerry asked, "Anyone for a break?"
and stopped when Susan answered in the affirmative.

Jerry and I have been on this trail before and this was a favorite spot of
mine. The outcropping extended a couple hundred feet out over nothing, just
several hundred feet of clean mountain air. Water bottles came out of
backpacks and after we each had downed half a bottle, we all sat down,
Susan between Jerry's legs, her arms over his knees as Andreas had sat with
me earlier. The two boys sat side-by-side, still and silent for a change.

The view from the outcropping was awesome and we were all drinking it in. I
thought back to the first time Jerry and I had climbed to this point and
how awestruck I had been. It was hard to tell Andreas' reaction as he sat
very still, gazing across the valley. After a fifteen-minute or so break,
Jerry stood as did the rest of us except Andreas. No-one said anything for
a couple minutes then Jerry asked, "Ready to go, Andreas?".

Andreas reacted as he would have being awakened from a dream. "Oh, sorry. I
could stay here the rest of the day," he replied softly. "It's strange,
it's scary, knowing you are hanging in midair, but awesome too. Well, I
guess awesome is scary," he said with a kind of puzzled look on his
face. He stood slowly and we moved out in silence for a while, then the two
boys started running about as before.

It had been almost nine when we left the house. Jerry and I would have left
after the sunrise and not gone back, but this was something new to Susan
and Andreas and to make a hike look like work rather than pleasure could
ruin the whole idea for them.

After another forty-five minutes or so of hiking we reached another
favorite spot of mine. The trail was level for about half a mile with a
small stream running beside it when, suddenly, it turned sharply and just
ahead was a wall of rock, I guess fifty or sixty feet high. Pouring over
the edge was a waterfall, not a large one, but very pretty. Jerry had told
me it was called Bridal Veil Falls and it was easy to see why: because the
water coming over the end of the cliff looked lacy.

There was no basin at the bottom of the falls. Instead the water flowed
down through round rocks, reappearing as the small stream some distance
from the falls. "Anyone for a drink?" Jerry asked as he held a cup under
the edge of the falls. Andreas was first in line and after gulping down a
cup full said, "Man, that is cold! I thought about a quick shower, but no
thank you! The water is icy, and even though I don't like a hot shower
except for relaxing, it isn't warm enough in north Georgia for me to get
under that falls!"

Everyone drank from the falls and we emptied our water bottles and refilled
then with the cold water. "Everyone's feet doing ok? The going is rougher
for a mile or so."

"Rougher than it has been?" Susan asked. She was sitting on a rock, taking
her shoes off.

"Yeah, we're going to be doing so serious climbing--I mean there is a
trail, it's not mountain climbing as you might think about mountain
climbing, but the trail is steep. Susan, you are wearing footies? You need
socks," Jerry said as he opened his backpack and took out a pair of heavy
socks. "Footies don't soak up sweat and you sure don't want wet feet for
the next few miles."

"Miles? Did you say miles?" Susan asked, as she took off her footies and
put on the socks Jerry gave her.

"Yeah, we've got about a couple miles before we reach the spot for lunch.
You doing ok?" Jerry asked Susan as he sat down beside her.

She looked at him with a half-hearted smile and said, "Sure. I guess I
never thought we'd be walking so far and so fast. But, yeah, I'm ok. Thanks
for the socks."

"Are we ready to move?" Jerry asked.

"Let's gooooooo," Edward said and started toward the trail that went up the
side of the falls in a kind of natural steps. Being natural, the steps were
not even and wound back and forth like switchbacks on a mountain road. As a
result, Edward and Andreas, who were ahead, didn't look back at us but down
on us. Jerry was walking ahead of Susan and often stopped, turned and
extended his hand to help her up when the steps were far apart.

It wasn't long before Edward and Andreas were no longer playful puppies,
but tired ones. I knew they would run down when they had approached the
falls' path as if it was nothing.

Jerry and I both stayed in good shape--Jerry had to get on my case after I
partnered with Ralph, since Ralph's idea of a heavy workout was hefting a
couple large beers, and I just couldn't seem to find the time for a workout
on my own. Jerry suggested we work out at the beginning of his shift and
end of mine. That was working fine. Andreas asked about joining us, but I
wasn't about to let him start a workout before his doctors gave their
ok. So far they had nixed the idea.

Andreas had asked questions about when he could start exercising and was
told he could walk all he wanted to, but no workouts and no running. When
he asked the doctors why, they just said they had to be sure all his
internal wounds had healed. Andreas hadn't said anything about it to me and
I didn't feel I could ask him about the situation. Not because of him, but
I was afraid I'd let slip what the doctors had told me. There were very
serious doubts about Andreas ever playing basketball again. I didn't
understand all the technical jargon, but what it all boiled down to was
that while Andreas was lying on the floor being kicked repeatedly by Kumba
Richardson, his insides were bruised and organs torn and ruptured. He
really was lucky to be alive, especially since he seemed in such good
health.

It was forty-five minutes after we started up the trail beside the
waterfall when we reached the top. All of us were sweaty, breathing hard
and ready for a break, even though the distance we had traveled was less
than a quarter mile. The top of the cliff was very deceptive since it
appeared to be a kind of mountain meadow with a small stream flowing
through it. When we reached the top, we all flopped down on the grass and
pulled out our water bottles and drank deeply.

After a fifteen-minute break, we started the last bit of the hike before
we'd eat. The hiking was easy as we walked along the grassy bank of the
small stream. Jerry and Susan were again walking side-by-side, holding
hands. Susan seemed to be enjoying herself again, but she was definitely an
unhappy camper when I reached the top of the falls. Edward and Andreas had
recovered and were again running ahead, veering off into the woods at the
edge of the grassy stream bank. I was glad I had insisted Andreas buy
several rolls of film because he was using it like it was going out of
style.

We were walking like we were out for an easy stroll, so it took a while to
reach the turnoff when we left the stream and walked into the forest. The
trail we took wandered through huge old trees, forming a leafy arch over
our heads. As we walked, Andreas stopped and waited until I caught up with
him. When I did, he wrapped his arm around my waist and motioned for
Edward. When he came over, Andreas slipped his arm around Edward's waist
and the three of us walked together. "Old friend and new friend," Andreas
said. "Thanks, Aaron."

"For what?"

"For everything, but especially for today. It has been wonderful. I never
knew the world could be so beautiful, so interesting, so exciting."

"Thanks to you for making me see it again, with new eyes."

"Yeah, that's what it is," Edward said. "I have been wondering what made
today different from all the other times I have been hiking here, but
that's it! Andreas has made me look, I mean really look. It's almost like I
was hiking in a place I had never seen before."

The three of us walked arm-in-arm until we reached a glade surrounded by
huge old oaks. "Anyone for lunch?" Jerry asked, as he dropped his backpack
on the ground.

"As if you needed to ask," Edward laughed, dropping his backpack.

We opened our backpacks and soon had our picnic spread. Along with cold
fried chicken, Mrs. Coghill had put potato salad--"I'll put this is Jerry's
backpack with two bottles of frozen water so it won't spoil and make you
sick"--pork and beans, carrot and celery sticks and fried-apple pies for
dessert. She had also included plastic forks and a plastic table cover,
which we spread out in a sunny spot near the middle of the glade.

When we had finished eating, there was nothing left of the food except
chicken bones. Jerry opened his backpack and took out five folded sheets of
plastic. "If you're going to take a nap, you might want to put one of these
under you to keep you off the damp ground." He took two of the sheets and
he and Susan moved across the glade from us--not private, but not right
under our noses.

I spread my sheet and lay down. When I did, Andreas spread his next to
mine, but perpendicular to it. He lay down with his head on my chest. "Hey,
I like that idea," Edward said, as he lay down with his head on Andreas'
chest. I might have thought something was going on here if I wasn't so
tired and sleepy, so instead I drifted off to sleep.

I expected us to take a short nap, but I guess no-one was anxious to get
moving again, because Jerry shook the three of us awake after an hour's
nap. "Aaron, what do you think? We can get to Eagle's Nest either by way of
the Alpine Meadows or the Cascades."

"You know what my choice would be," I said. "I'd always choose the Cascades
but, since Susan is new to this, Alpine Meadows is definitely an easier
hike. It would take about the same length of time since Alpine Meadows is
easier, but longer."

"Or we could split up," Edward said. "I know both routes as well as you
do."

"Ok, Susan and I will take the Alpine Meadows trail. Aaron?"

"I said I would choose the Cascades trail but, if you and Susan don't mind,
I think I'll tag along with you."

"Andreas, the Cascades trail is pretty steep and rugged, but it is
beautiful. It is up to you. I'll hike either one," Edward said.

Andreas looked at me as if asking for permission. That was something we had
to talk about. I certainly didn't want him looking at me as a parent,
although I did some of the duties of one I suppose, but I was not his
father. "Andreas, the Cascades trail is really beautiful, but is very
rugged. You need to decide whether you are up to it or not."

"I'm fine," he answered. "You don't mind if I go with Edward?"

I started to ask "Why should I?" but thought better of it and just said,
"Not at all".

We all got our backpacks on, after making sure we had all our trash in
them, and started. Shortly after we left the glade, we separated.

The Alpine Meadows are a series of mountain meadows rising in what were
natural terraces. The slope was gentle, but constant, between the stone
ledges forming the terraces. Some of the terraces were very steep,
essentially straight up, but they were never very long so hiking was
generally very easy. A couple times Jerry went on ahead so he could help
Susan up a ledge which was very steep and with few footholds, but she
seemed to be enjoying the hike, unlike the morning one.

About half-way across the meadows was a huge boulder, twenty or thirty feet
high at the front and ground level at the back. The three of us walked onto
it and to the forward edge. The day had been cool and, when we got to the
top, there was a gentle breeze which seemed almost cold--since we were all
sweating from exertion getting to the top of the boulder. The sun had
warmed the rock and it felt soooo good when I lay on my stomach, looking
across the valley to rock cliffs on the other side. After lying on my
stomach for a while, I turned over and watched the white fluffy clouds
moving slowly across the sky. After several minutes I laughed when I
realized I was playing a game I had played as a child--imagining the clouds
were first one thing and then another.

"Something funny, Aaron?" Susan asked.

"Yeah, see that cloud up there? It's Mickey Mouse. See? There's his ears
and there is his nose," I said as pointed out parts of a large cloud almost
overhead.

"Look, he's changing into a duck," Susan laughed.

"You both have lost it. A cloud's a cloud," good-natured and literalist
Jerry said.

"Use your imagination, Jerry," Susan said.

"I did, and it's still a cloud," he replied.

Our talk drifted from one thing to another. Susan asked about Andreas.
Jerry told her about his being beaten, but not why. She was very clever at
probing for an answer to that question, but I was clever enough to realize
what she wanted and not to give it to her. Jerry asked what the latest from
the doctors was. "There was good news and bad news," I answered. The good
news is that he's doing very well. The bad news is that he probably will
never play basketball again and may have to restrict other activities. I
don't understand it all, but one of his doctors said, 'Look, his insides
took a real beating and think about it as leaving some weak places which
could bust loose if he overdoes things'. He seems fine, but I worry. He has
an MRI and CAT scan next week and they should give a more definite answer
about the future. I don't know how he will take it if he is told no more
basketball. He had been told he had a clear path to the NBA, and being told
the fame and money are not to be is bound to be a blow. We'll see."

"I guess a final decision may come as a blow, but he certainly seemed at
ease when he told Edward his career might be over. I think being a doctor
is more important to him than fame and money," Susan said.

"Yeah, and I hope you're right," I replied.

Lying on the warm rock made me sleepy, so sleepy I was reluctant to get up
and get moving--as were Jerry and Susan--but finally we did. We hiked at a
leisurely pace, stopping when something interesting caught our attention.
We finally reached Eagle's Nest half an hour or so before sundown. I had
expected the two boys to arrive before us since they could move at a good
clip without Susan and both were in good shape, so while the trail was
strenuous, the distance was much less than the meadows trail and they
should have been present, but were not. As time passed, I began to get
worried and I could see Jerry was as well, but neither of us said
anything--to avoid upsetting Susan.

After waiting twenty minutes, and growing increasingly anxious, I said, "I
think I'll go down the Cascades trail and see what's holding up the guys."

"Sure you know the trail?" Jerry asked.

"Yeah, no problem."

"Got a flashlight?"

"Yeah. I'll be fine." I started down the trail and as soon as I entered the
woods, it became very dark. Even though the sun had not gone down, it was
so low on the horizon that the trees blocked its light. I had gone about a
hundred yards down the trail when I saw a light ahead. As I drew near it, I
could see the two boys, arm-in-arm coming up the trail. I finally
acknowledged a feeling, an emotion I had felt several times earlier in the
day. I was jealous! "You really have something to deal with, Aaron," I said
to myself, "and damn soon".

As I drew near the two, I felt relief and shame because they were not
walking arm-in-arm. Edward had an arm around Andreas' shoulders, using him
as a crutch, favoring his left foot. "What's the problem guys?"

"I stepped on a loose rock. It rolled and I turned an ankle about
three-quarters of a mile back. Man, I couldn't have made it without
Andreas."

"I got worried," I said, "and decided to see if I could find you. Here,
Edward, let me and Andreas pack you to Eagle's Nest. "Andreas and I formed
a pack saddle with our arms, bent forward and Edward sat down. We lifted
him and walked as quickly as possible to where Jerry and Susan were
waiting.

"What happened? Edward have one of his lazy attacks?" Jerry asked.

"Yeah, I guess he decided there was no way he was going to get away with it
otherwise, so he turned an ankle," Andreas answered.

"How bad is it, Bro?" Jerry asked.

"Pretty sure it is only a sprain, but it hurts like hell. Got an ace
bandage in your backpack?"

"Sure." Jerry took out the Ace and bound Edward's ankle. "That'll hold you
'til we get home."

"We're not going yet are we? Look, the sunset is going to be awesome,"
Edward said.

The sun was almost touching the horizon and it was easy to see a
spectacular sunset was already started. "Think you can stand an hour more,
Sport?" his brother asked.

"Sure. Wouldn't miss the show," Edward answered.

Jerry took from his backpack the two water bottles which had been frozen,
and handed them to Edward. "These will help," he said, as he poured the
water and what little ice was left into a plastic bag, making an ice pack.

The sunset did not disappoint us and it was quite dark when we started down
the path to where the Jeep waited about a quarter-mile away. Edward was
clearly in pain, but didn't complain. When we reached the house,
Mrs. Coghill had Edward ice his ankle and as soon as that was underway, she
started serving up a great country supper.

After supper, we cleaned up for Mrs. Coghill and were all ready to turn in
after a day hiking. I was half-asleep when Andreas said, "Thanks,
Aaron. Thanks very much."

"For what, Andreas?"

"For bringing me up here, for letting me get to know your friends, for
showing me just how beautiful the world is and can be. For letting me know
you are there when I need you. For giving me a day with Edward."

"Thank you, Andreas, for making me aware of... I'm not sure of what except
of being alive, of seeing and wanting to see, really see... Just thanks,
Andreas. Thanks. I guess it was good being with someone your own age. I
know you must miss that."

"Come off it, Aaron. I'll be nineteen shortly and you are what? 40?"

"Not quite that ancient. I'm twenty-two."

"No! Really? Three whole years older! I was six and you were nine. You were
twelve and I was nine. You were sixteen and I was only thirteen. You
were..." Andreas couldn't go on because we both were laughing so hard. When
he got calmed down he said, "No, it was not about being with someone my own
age--he's older too, you know--it was just good to be with someone like
myself who is essentially carefree. I mean he has to worry about grades in
college, and I do in high school, but that's it. I don't have to worry
about anything. Well, maybe whether or not I get to play basketball again,
but we don't have to worry about things you and Jerry have to worry
about--work, getting shot, those kinds of things. Well, I do worry about
that sometimes, your getting shot, I mean."

"Nothing to worry about, Andreas, I don't plan on getting shot."

"You do and I'll kill you," he laughed.

Sunday Mrs. Coghill went to church and left the five of us to fend for
ourselves, which we did very nicely. She had just walked in when the rest
of the Coghill clan came in and all of them pitched in finishing Sunday
dinner.

After dinner, the grownups gathered on the deck overlooking a stream behind
the house where the youngsters were playing. "Andreas, how about joining
the kids? This bunch of adults are getting b-o-r boring," Edward said. The
two young men were soon in the creek with the kids.

It was about 3:30 when we were all packed, said our goodbyes and headed
back toward Atlanta. "What a great weekend! It was fantastic," Andreas
said. "And now it's back to school."

"And next weekend?"

"It's really late this year, but it's prom weekend."

"You going?"

"I paid my prom dues, but I guess not. I'd have to rent a tux and all that
stuff."

"Don't have a date?"

"Nope, I'm gay, remember?"

"So?"

"So it wouldn't be fair."

"Why not? You take a girl to the prom, you have a good time, you show her a
good time. Take her home, give her a goodnight kiss. You don't have to fuck
her for heaven's sake."

"I don't know. I wouldn't feel right."

"Because you are making too big a deal of it. Go stag if you don't want a
date. Of course, I suspect there are few women available this late in the
game, but a girl who hasn't been asked would tell her grand kids about
you. Give it some thought."

When we got home we put things away, had leftovers from Sunday dinner
Mrs. Coghill sent home with us, and both got a shower and crawled into bed.

Sometime in the night I woke to hear soft sobs from Andreas' bed. I got up,
walked to his bed and sat on the edge. "Andreas, you awake? Bad dream?
What's wrong?"

Andreas sat up in bed, wrapped his arms around my neck and really started
sobbing. I didn't know what was wrong so I just held him close. When he
regained control, he looked up at me and said, "Aaron, he was beating me
again".

"A bad dream, Andreas, just a bad dream. He will never touch you again. I
promise he will never hurt you again." I held him until he relaxed and went
to sleep. I eased him into the bed and stood for the longest time looking
at him, wondering what I could do to make his life easier, and I did not
come up with an answer.

Monday Ralph came by for me, and I let Andreas drive the Jeep to school
since he had an appointment for a follow-up exam at 1:00. I knew he was
anxious about it, but he didn't want me to go with him even though I told
him I thought I should be there.

"Man, you sure are uptight today," Ralph said as soon as I was in the
car. I didn't even have time to say "good morning".

"You got that right."

"Today's the big day for Andreas. Surprised you're not with him."

"He didn't want me to go with him. I let him take the Jeep. His
appointment--I guess that's appointments--start at one."

"That what he told you? And you believed him? Man, you have a lot to learn
about raising teenagers."

"That's another thing he got on me about this weekend. He reminded me I
wasn't that much older than he is. He's a teenager for only a bit over a
year then he hits the roaring twenties". Time dragged terribly. Ralph and I
stopped for lunch at noon and when we got back in the car, we had to do a
run out to the airport to pick up a package. It was some special stuff
really needed by the lab downtown. The plane was late so it was after two
when we got the package, and almost three when we got back downtown. When
we got back in the car, he drove as if he knew where he was going. "Where
are we headed?" I asked.

"Where do you suspect? We're headed for Grady." Ralph picked up the car
mike and said, "Mattie, Ralph. Aaron and I are headed to Grady to check out
something in case you need us." When we reached Grady, there was a police
cruiser parked in the tow away zone. Ralph walked up to the car and spoke
to the officer in the driver seat. As he walked back to the car, the
cruiser left. "You have to have a few years service before Grady provides
free parking," he said as he pulled into the space just vacated by the
cruiser.

When we reached the information desk, Ralph walked up to the elderly pink
lady sitting behind the desk and said, "Honey, we're supposed to be
accompanying Andreas Jackson who is here for tests. Can you locate him?"

"It might take a minute. He's not a patient, right?"

"Right. He's just here for tests."

The pink lady dialed a couple of numbers and after the second one said,
"He's in the outpatient waiting room. Do you know your way?"

"Yes, I do. Thank you, Honey."

"Laying it on a little thick, ain't you, Dude?"

"Dude, I learned one way to keep pink ladies and waitresses at Waffle House
from calling you Honey is to call them Honey first. Here we are."

Andreas was sitting in the waiting room, a notebook on his lap, his head in
a book. "How you be doin', Dude," Ralph asked.

Andreas looked up and a huge smile spread across his face. "Hey, Old Dude,
I knew you'd come. Thanks."

"Yeah, Couldn't keep Aaron away. What's 'appin'?"

"Looks like nothin' 'appin'. Well, actually, they have taken my blood, my
piss, and punched and probed. They did an ultrasound and a CAT scan, and I
am waiting to have an MRI made and then I can go. It will be a week before
I learn anything."

"Hurry up and wait... Yeah, I know that routine," Ralph said.

"Guess you need to be out catching doers of dark deeds," Andreas smiled.

"Nah, we placed them all on hold while we checked on you."

We stayed with Andreas until they came and got him for his MRI. I don't
know what took so long, but it was after four when he came back. "I'm done
for the day," he announced. "Want a ride, Roomy?" he asked with a great
Andreas smile.

"See you in the morning, partner," Ralph said as we walked out of
Grady. Andreas and I walked to the parking lot and picked up the Jeep. He
drove.

I could tell Andreas was uptight and I wasn't sure if it was because of
what he had gone through today, or remembering what had happened, or worry
about what might happen. "Worried, Tiger?" I asked.

"Yeah, a little bit. There seemed to be an awful lot of tests and things
today, like they were looking for something and couldn't find it. I don't
know whether I have lost something or what."

"Know it won't do any good to tell you not to worry. I do. But you're in
good hands."

"Yeah, I know." As Andreas spoke, the phone rang. He was sitting near it
and picked it up. "Aaron's and Andreas' place, this is Andreas... Oh, hello
Ms. Helms. How you doin'?... Yeah, I spent the day at your place... No,
don't know anything yet... Yeah, the man's here. Aaron, Ms. Helms."

"LaTonya, what's 'appin'?"

"How'd you like to do a repeat of the prom, Aaron?"

"What do you mean?"

"Ms. Allen called me today and asked if I could chaperone for the prom. I
asked if I could bring a date and she asked if DeWayne was in town. I told
her no, but I thought I might round up an old prom date. Interested, or do
you think it would put a crimp in Andreas' style?"

"He says he's not going. Got any spare maidens he might escort?"

"As a matter of fact, I do. My next door neighbor's daughter is in the same
fix I was in. She thinks she's engaged to a sailor who is under the ocean
somewhere. I'm sure she'd like to go, but thinks most men might get the
wrong idea. Probably be an early night for Andreas since she only wants to
go to the prom."

"Does she bark?" I asked.

"No, you fool, she's actually very good-looking. Let me talk to Andreas. I
know he knows her."

"Andreas, I have a matchmaker on the phone. She'd like to talk to you."

"Andreas, Ms. Helms... No, I hadn't planned on going... I guess I could. I
just don't have a lot of money to spend... Aaron, she wants to speak to
you."

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Andreas is concerned about the money, I think. Can you handle two proms?"

"If you two don't expect the limo treatment, sure."

"Put Andreas back on."

Andreas listened for a while and finally said, "Sure, I know she's pretty
and a lot of fun... Well, if it will help you out, I'll go. Aaron."

"Take it you talked him into it."

"Sure did. You'll be proud of him, Aaron, because he cleans up nice and so
does she. I'll be wearing pale yellow and I think she will be in
streetwalker red. Talk to you later."

"You know, I think we were just walked into a trap," I said as I hung up
the phone.

"Yeah, well, if I have to show up at the prom with a female date, LaLisa is
the one. She is one good-looking woman--not that that turns me on, but I do
appreciate a thing of beauty. And, hey, you didn't do so bad yourself."

Tuesday after I got off, Andreas and I made arrangements for tux--very
classical and conservative. While we were at the mall, we ordered flowers
for the girls and when we got back home, I made dinner reservations at the
Peasant Uptown, a place I loved when I could scrape together enough.

"Guess they will just have to go in a Jeep because I am not springing for a
limo," I said.

"Better than a police escort," Andreas laughed.

"Better keep this a secret or Ralph may show up with a police escort," I
laughed in turn.

The rest of the week was very busy as Ralph and I got assigned to a series
of burglaries on the Northside. Man, those people must have piles of money
or very good credit. The burglar used the same MO so we were pretty sure it
was one person or the same persons. The stuff taken would not be showing up
in pawn shops. All of it was art, mostly paintings, but some small
sculptures. One man was devastated because the burglar had taken four
paintings and left three in the library. The burglar was helpful in one
way. He turned on the computer and left a scrolling message, "I never touch
forgeries. It is dishonest."

The insurance company decided to have the paintings checked and they were
forgeries. It was doubly funny because the originals had been widely
reported as part of a European art theft so the guy who bought them knew he
was--at least he thought he was--purchasing stolen goods. Money doesn't
make people honest or change the nature of their crimes, their crimes just
involve more money.

Mid-week I made appointments for Andreas and myself to get our hair worked
on--Friday after work. One of my classmates had earned his barber's license
when he was sixteen and worked Friday night through Saturday in a College
Park barbershop. He was flat out good and had earned enough to get his own
apartment and go to Georgia State when he graduated from high school. Now
he arranged his class schedule to allow him to work Friday and Saturday and
one other day in the week. He had a huge customer base so he was doing
well.

As a police officer, I probably should have just shaved my head like most
of the black officers, but I didn't. I kept a "high and tight" cut. Andreas
was one of those rare dark-skinned people who had what is known in the
black community as "good hair". It was plentiful, very soft and curly, not
kinky. His hair was beautiful so he wore it in what I guess was a standard
cut for whites, but rare for African-Americans.

Ralph dropped me off at the apartment. When I got upstairs, Andreas was
having a Coke and watching something on TV, I think one of those "I beat
her ass because she be fucking my baby daddy" shows. When I came in he
turned and asked, "Where do they get these people? They are advertising for
women who had a baby by their father or brother. Those people are crazy."

"Not too crazy to get on TV and make a fool of themselves," I answered.
"Talk about being a disgrace to your race, they are a disgrace to the whole
human race. Ready to go get beautified?"

After we had finished at the barber shop, we went by a rib place and ate
ribs for supper. "I like ribs, but I wonder if the meat is worth the
battle," Andreas said.

"No question in my mind about that," I said, wiping the sauce from my face.

On the way home, we picked up our tux. Both fit like they were
tailor-made. "If I keep going to proms, I need to buy one of these," I
said.

I had the flowers delivered to the apartment since delivery was free and
saved me a trip. By seven Andreas and I were ready. He was one handsome
guy--tall, well-built, beautiful rich milk chocolate skin and a smile that
would stop a train. "God, you are good-looking," I said as we stood
side-by-side, checking everything in a mirror.

"Not such a bad-looking brother yourself," he said and smiled.

I don't know why I didn't think about the drive, but we had to go to
College Park, pick up our dates, then drive all the way across Atlanta for
dinner, but the food was worth it, we all agreed. Although the prom started
at 8:00, from experience I knew nothing would happen until close to 9:00.
The senior walk was at 10:30. At least half the juniors and seniors would
show up for the walk and leave soon afterward, having more interesting
things to do in the hotel rooms their parents rented for them. Since the
prom was being held at the Peachtree Center hotel, we had a relatively
short drive after dinner and arrived at 8:30. The band was just getting
started and the couples present seemed reluctant to dance. LaTonya and I
weren't and as soon as we started dancing, Andreas and LaLisa joined us.

LaTonya and I danced some, nibbled on the food and visited with teachers. I
had seen some of them when I went to the conference for Andreas, some I had
not seen since graduation. Ms. Boynton, head of the science-math magnet
program, said, "I don't like to talk shop at a party, but you need to speak
to Andreas about next year. Georgia Tech and Georgia State are both putting
pressure on me to have him make up his mind."

"And Emory?"

"I suspect Emory know they don't stand a chance since they are not a
basketball powerhouse," she smiled. With Georgia Tech being a nationally
known basketball school and Georgia State rising in the ranks, Emory's
basketball program was a joke since even basketball players were expected
to make the grades to stay in without selected courses, tutors, all that
goes with getting basketball players regardless of academics.

"I wouldn't count Emory out, especially if the other two have to have an
answer right away. He is more relaxed than he has been for a while. He had
a through going over Monday and hasn't gotten the results yet. That may
answer the basketball question with a big 'NO!' but nothing's sure right
now. He would definitely pick Emory, all things being equal, because he
really wants to go to med school there."

"Well, his options will be closing soon, regardless of what he decides."

"Thanks for the warning. He's supposed to get the results of his tests
Monday. I'll talk to him then."

At midnight the band played the last dance and we left. When we were in the
Jeep, I asked, "Anyone up for food or drink?".

"After the food and drink at the prom?" LaLisa asked. "Last year at the
junior-senior the food was scarce and bad. I heard the juniors saying that
would not happen this year. There really was no need for going out to
dinner before but, don't get me wrong, I really enjoyed it. Andreas, thanks
so much for inviting me. I really wanted to go, but would not have gone
without a date. You are a gentleman and a scholar," she laughed, then said,
"Hey, never thought about it, but that's really true in your case".

We took LaLisa home first. Andreas walked her to the door, took her key and
opened the door, kissed her on the cheek and came back toward the Jeep when
she went inside. As he approached, LaTonya said, "Someone commented on the
lack of social graces among the athletes at the Christmas dance and noted
Andreas was an exception, and he sure is. I wonder why?"

"I doubt that it was from home training," I said. "Or maybe it was from his
mom. I did notice he was reading a book on manners right after he agreed to
go to the prom. He takes everything seriously, I think, even having fun!"

"He's a great fellow, but you know that don't you?"

"Yeah, I do." I wasn't sure what LaTonya meant by her remark and kept my
response very general.

Andreas was unusually quiet as we rode home after dropping LaTonya off, so
much so that I noticed it right away. I wasn't sure where his thoughts
were, so I didn't disturb him.

As we walked upstairs, I asked, "Did you have a good time, Andreas?".

"I had a wonderful time," he said as I unlocked the door. "It was almost
perfect."

"Oh, only almost perfect?" I asked as I turned on the living room lamp.
"And just what would have made it perfect?" Andreas suddenly looked down
and blushed. "Yes?"

"I... Nothin', Nothin', Aaron," Andreas answered.

"Ahh, come on. You turn down a chance for a perfect evening. May never have
another chance."

Andreas was standing just inside the door, and when I spoke he looked down,
digging at the carpet with the toe of his shoe--the exact picture of a
nine-year-old asking his first girlfriend for a kiss. He blushed and looked
up, half-smiling, half-hesitant. "I'm afraid, Aaron. Just forget it."

"What horrible thing is it you need to make your evening perfect?"

"Not horrible for me. Maybe for you."

"Give me a chance to be horrified," I said. "What would make this a perfect
evening, Andreas?"

The young man looked at me, again acting like an embarrassed nine-year-old.
He finally looked up, a shy smile on his face. I had to listen hard to hear
his soft response. "A dance with you."

"Whoa," I said to myself. "What have I let myself in for?" I knew I had
thoughts about Andreas--nothing definite, just a feeling, a questioning.
Here he was asking me to dance with him and I knew his request implied more
than just friendship. I mean it had to, right? I was confused, frightened,
unsure of myself, of my world. Wouldn't a dance with him indicate a kind of
feeling and commitment I wasn't sure I had or could give. Finally I had to
respond so I asked, "A dance with me would make your evening perfect?". I
asked as though I had not heard correctly.

"Yeah, but if you don't want to, I understand. I mean I'm gay and all. And
I can understand if you don't want to and all. Me being gay and all."

We could straighten out what I did and didn't feel later, and I did mean
later. This was important to a kid who was on his way back from hell. "Put
on a CD, Andreas," I said as I slid open the glass door to the balcony, the
only place beside our tiny kitchen that wasn't carpeted. The balcony wasn't
huge, but it was big enough for a dance.

The CD started and Andreas walked out onto the balcony and took my hand,
and pulled me into his embrace as a real oldie started:

Are the stars out tonight I don't know if it's cloudy or bright 'Cause I
only have eyes for you, dear

The moon may be high But I can't see a thing in the sky 'Cause I only have
eyes for you

I don't know if we're in a garden Or on a crowded avenue You are here, so
am I Maybe millions of people go by But they all disappear from view 'Cause
I only have eyes for you

I was confused, bewildered. Andreas was holding me close as he started
singing with the CD. He had to know the effect he was having on me. In
fact, it might be clearer to him than to me. I was aroused, more than I
could ever remember being aroused. Andreas could not help feeling my hard
cock between us. And what really bothered me was I felt like I was where I
was supposed to be--in Andreas' arms, dancing to a love song in a warm
spring night. He said a dance with me would make the night perfect, well I
hadn't expected the night to be special, just a bit out of the ordinary.
Now he was making the night perfect for me. My mind was a whirl, my
thoughts all over the map. Was I gay? Was I in love with Andreas? What
would it mean if I were--either gay or in love with Andreas? Could I be in
love with him without being gay? Was I taking advantage of him?

If I thought I was confused while we were dancing, my world came to pieces
and became whole at the same time when, as the song ended, Andreas put his
hand under my chin, tilting it up, smiled and placed his lips against mine
in a deep, passionate kiss. His tongue invaded my mouth, bringing with it a
taste, the taste of Andreas. I literally dissolved in his arms. My legs
became weak, my knees collapsed and, as I started to fall, Andreas swept me
into his arms and carried me into the living room. There he placed me on
the sofa and stood, looking down at me, a smile starting then being wiped
away by worry. He finally sat down beside me and said, "I'm sorry, Aaron. I
really am. No, I'm not. I'm not sorry I let you know I'm in love with you,
but I am sorry I upset you. Forgive me. Please?"

I couldn't speak. I was too confused. I reached up and took Andreas' hand
and pulled him down beside me. I looked at him and, for reasons I couldn't
understand, huge tears started running down my face. As soon as he saw
them, Andreas slid off the sofa and lay on the floor in fetal position and
started sobbing in great, heart-breaking sobs. "Oh, God, Aaron, please
forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt you. Now I have destroyed everything."

I didn't know what to say or do and wasn't sure I could say or do
anything. Finally I could stand it no longer and slid off the sofa and
gathered Andreas in my arms. When I was able to speak, I said, "Andreas,
you have destroyed nothing. I'm not sure what you have done. I am confused,
but you have destroyed nothing. I'm not sure what has happened, but I am
not sorry that you asked me to dance with you. I do know it felt right and
wonderful. But I need time to work through a lot of things, a lot of
feelings. Can you give me that? Please?"

"Aaron, I am sure of one thing and maybe only one thing. I love you. I knew
it the weekend we were in north Georgia. When Edward and I left the three
of you, we were having a great time talking, asking each other questions. I
don't know why, but he asked me if I was gay and I told him I was. I
expected him to tell me to get lost--and I would have been had he left me,"
Andreas smiled. "He asked me if we were boyfriends and I told him we were
not, but that I had fallen in love with you. He asked me some very pointed
questions. He wanted to know if I was in love or just grateful for your
having taken me in. He really pushed at me to make sure I was in love and
not just lusting after your body--I told him I was, but there was more than
lust. More than infatuation, I also assured him. He asked when I was going
to tell you and I told him I was afraid I would run you off. He was the
reason I wanted to make sure you realized you were not a great deal older
than I was. All that sort of thing. I had felt I was in love with you
before, but after that afternoon with Edward, I was sure."

"Maybe I need to spend an afternoon with Edward," I smiled. "Obviously you
can get me hot and horny, but I would never base a relationship on that. In
fact, it would destroy any relationship we had. I can't sort out my
feelings right now. I'm not sure I am gay. I mean I had a girlfriend that I
loved, I really did love her, but... I'm confused, Andreas."

"That's ok and you can have all the space and time you need to sort things
out. Just don't feel pity for me and pretend you love me. I'll wait until
you can honestly say you do or do not love me."

"Andreas, I'll never lie to you. There is no question that I love you.
Never doubt that. The only question, the only one, is the nature of that
love." I got up from the floor, extended a hand and pulled Andreas to his
feet. When I did, I embraced him in a bear hug and said, "Andreas, I
thought I was the older guy and you are the one who is supposed to be
confused."

"Yeah, well, I guess we are just different."

It was nearly two in the morning when we got to bed. Andreas was snoring
softly soon after he crawled under the covers. I lay awake, playing the
night's events over and over in my mind. I was still questioning them and
myself when I finally went to sleep.

I was very sound asleep when I was awakened by a bloodcurdling scream. I
shot straight up in bed, confused and disoriented. When I got my bearings,
I realized where I was and that Andreas had screamed. About the time I was
fully awake, Andreas screamed again. He had rolled himself in a tight ball
in the middle of his bed. I went to him and shook him to wake him. When he
was half-awake, he put his arms around my neck, squeezing me very tight as
he started sobbing. I held him close until he regained control, then asked
what was wrong.

"I had a nightmare again, Aaron. I dreamed I told Mom and Kumba I was in
love with you and Mom started beating me and Kumba strapped on his gun and
went looking for you. It was horrible."

"It was only a dream, Andreas. You are safe here and I am here. It's ok. Go
back to sleep now."

"Can I sleep with you? Please?"

"Oh, boy," I thought. "How can I say no and how can I sleep with Andreas in
bed with me?" I guess I was about to find out. "Sure."

I went back to bed and Andreas climbed in beside me, spooning himself into
my back. As he had felt in my arms dancing, so in my bed. It seemed so
right, so where he should be.

We slept late Sunday, finally crawling out of bed in the early afternoon.
No mention was made by either of us of the events of last night. There was,
it seemed to me, a feeling of intimacy in just being together, but it could
have been my imagination.

To be continued...


>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
*MARTA==Metro Atlanta Rapid Transit Authority (I think). It is Atlanta's
rapid rail part of the public transit system.

**"Deliverance": novel by James Dickey set in north Georgia mountains. The
major characters are city boys, most of whom suffer at the hands of north
Georgia rednecks, including a homosexual rape. All of the characters except
one die during the weekend outing. Made into a movie with Burt Reynolds.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

A note will be appreciated: sequoyah@charter.net