Date: Fri, 4 Dec 2009 16:02:11 -0500
From: S Smith <mheast111@hotmail.com>
Subject: I'm Not Gay.....Am I? Chapter 3

Warning: The usual disclaimers apply here.  If you don't like any of the
following, leave now: gay sex, vulgar or harsh language, etc.

This is pure fiction. No one in this story is a real person, living or
deceased. Please do not copy without my consent.  Please practice safe sex.

		       I'm Not Gay?  Am I? Chapter 3

The sound of the crickets fill the spring night air here on the farm. I
lean against our wood fence by the barn enclosure and stare up at the stars
shining across the night sky. A breeze is blowing open the light jacket I
pulled on over my shirtless torso. Looking down at my bare chest I see the
smeared blood and a bruise forming, and my eyes start to burn with tears. I
bring the vodka bottle to my lips and swallow, feeling the liquid flow into
me and warm my chest. Thankfully the farm house behind me has remained
dark, so neither my parents, nor my little brother and sister heard me come
home awhile ago.

I'm here again. Spending another night in the darkness, listening to the
crickets and wondering why I have to continue to go through this life. So
many times I've cried and felt this loneliness. So many times I've planned
how I could go to sleep forever. Yet, here I remain.

I had been so hopeful after graduation. It was supposed to be the start of
my new life away from the fucking assholes in high school. But that wasn't
to be. The college plans got changed and I'm stuck for my freshman year in
the local community college, along with about half of my high school
classmates. I knew from the first day of classes that life was the
same. The same faces of the same assholes, the same bullying and taunts,
the same gay rumors. They were different hallways, but the same exact fears
gripped my life.

It was during my third week of classes that I saw Ryan in the hallway. He
didn't notice me, as I stood frozen while he strutted by me. It had only
been a matter of weeks since that day he had tied me up by his family's
pool and raped me. Right after he had helped his best friend Todd do the
same to me. I still scream inside when I relive the memories. My mind and
body unwilling to forget. The memories haunt me day and night, but mostly
in my nightmares. I still wake up yelling, or screaming, or shaking. My
dick usually shooting cum. My fucking dick that always betrays me.

Just like that night after it happened. My dick betrayed me then, in front
of my little brother Josh. It changed our relationship. We used to be
buddies, but now I can't even stand to look at him. Nor does he want to
even look at me. I asked him to get out of my room that night, but he stood
there watching. He's my fucking brother! But just like Ryan and Todd, he
stood over me and watched me lose control of my dick.

Three months ago it all seemed to change. It was on the first day of spring
semester in my new stats class. I picked a seat in the back of the room,
and she sat down next to me. In a little short skirt, small blue sweater,
and her blond hair in a pony tail. She smiled and introduced
herself. Sarah. She had grown up in Hillsdale, a little town about 60 miles
from here. And I saw the way she looked at me. My heart had beat faster as
I realized for the first time in years a girl was actually noticing
me. Maybe it was my new spring t-shirt, maybe it was the daily two hour
workouts I still did. I really didn't know. But she had looked me and
smiled, and by the end of that week we had our first date.

It was my first date since my freshman year in high school. All those years
no girls would be seen with me, since I was the gay guy. But Srah didn't
know those rumors, and she looked at the real me. I knew she was my key
back to myself.

I was probably too aggressive that night after our third date when she took
me to see her tiny college apartment. But she put up little resistance as I
pressed against her and was able to wrestle her out of her sweater and
skirt. It happened quickly, but I finally was able to get my cock back into
a girl. It was the first time I fucked a pussy since the summer before my
freshman year!

Afterwards I had laid there, as images flashed through my mind of Ryan and
Todd between my legs. But a big smile had crossed my face, because I knew
then it was all finally over. Sarah had ended my hell, I thought.

"Eric"....  Daniel's deep voice came from behind me. I didn't even have to
turn around to know it was him. Fuck! No matter what I do, I can't avoid
this asshole!

Swinging his legs over the side of the fence, I feel the wood shift as he
straddles the beam I'm leaning against. Glancing over at him, I see he's
wearing flip flops, and his plaid shirt is hanging open, his hair is
damp. He must have been out behind the barn, using the outdoor shower stall
again for one of his typical late night showers. That damn shower! I've
avoided him ever since that day we both were out there and I saw him
naked. When my cock had betrayed me and he saw it.

"Can I have some?" His hand grabs the vodka from me, and he takes a long
swallow from the bottle.

Silently I just stare, waiting for him to go away.

"So what's up? Why you sitting out here in the middle of the night?"

"No reason."

"Need to talk? Problems with Sarah?"

No fucking way I was talking with him! "No, just wanna be alone."

"Okay. But hey, if you ever want to talk it's cool with me. You know I
won't tell your Dad." I feel his hand grip my left shoulder, and I look
over at him. In the moonlight his hair glistens, and I can see the hair on
his bare chest is still wet from the shower. Daniel's a nice enough guy. A
hard worker, good with the cattle and crops. Dad hired him about three
years ago to help out around here. He lives in the trailer out back, and
has always kept to himself. But ever since that day by the shower, he seems
determined to talk to me.

Swigging back the final swallow of vodka I toss the bottle out into the
field and turn to walk away. Grabbing my arm, Daniel turns me to face him,
but I shove him back.

"Eric! What the fuck happened to you?!" Staring at my blood smeared chest,
he pushes back my jacket.

"Leave me the fuck alone," I say grabbing my jacket closer, and starting to
walk back toward the house.

"Eric!?" His hands grip my shoulder as he looks into my eyes. I squeeze my
eyes shut, but the tears burn and roll down my cheeks, as I look to the
ground in embarrassment.

It wasn't the first time I had fought back tears tonight. I had been so
happy earlier though when I took Sarah for a movie. It was a typical Friday
date night for us, and I had been looking forward to get her back to her
apartment for another one of our fucks. It had become a regular thing and I
loved it.  Having her beneath me, each time I pumped into her, I knew I was
further and further away from the taunts of "Eric Gay". Every time I slide
my hard cock into her, I knew just how straight I was. Every time she urged
me to "fuck her" I was becoming a real man.

But instead of going to her apartment, she had urged me to drive up toward
the Willow Hollow neighborhood in town. It as an affluent area I avoided,
but her best friend Nicky was there at a party. Nicky's new boyfriend lived
up there with his parents who were gone for the weekend. So there was a big
college party and Sarah begged to swing by to check it out. I hated the
idea, but I knew if I appeased her within a few hours we would be back at
her apartment with me pumping between her legs.

Blindly I followed her directions to the house, and it wasn't until I
pulled up in front of the address that I realized where I was. Looming
through my car's windshield stood the brick house, the windows bursting
with light, and the dull pumping sound of rock of music floating out. I had
been in that house before. Last summer.

My feet moved up the driveway in slow motion. Standing in the foyer, I had
looked down at the floor where I had previously laid in a heap after being
kicked. Out on the back deck, I could see the spot where I had been tied to
the post.

The hot tub was packed full, but I saw the muscular brown bicep leisurely
swung around a small brunette. When I looked at the back of his head with
the jet black hair I knew immediately it was Todd. My sphincter squeezed,
and then I heard the other rapist to my right. In a lounge chair, dressed
only in his speedo sat Ryan, casually kissing a small blonde girl. When his
eyes finally opened, he stared directly at me and that sinister smile
crossed his face.

"Hey Eric!" he said, shoving the blonde out of his way, and climbing up out
of the lounge chair.

I only stared at him, as Sarah quickly grabbed the blonde ho climbed out of
the chair. "Hey Nicky! This is Eric. Eric, this is my friend Nicky."

Shaking her hand, my eyes never left Ryan's as he continues to smile at me.

"Hi Eric! This is my boyfriend Ryan," Nicky said to us both. His hand
snaked out and shook mine. It burned like fire.

"Yup, I know Eric! We graduated together, didn't we, buddy?" Grabbing me
around the shoulders, we looked as though we were friends.

"Good to meet you too, Ryan. I am Sarah," she said, looking up at him,
completely mesmerized by his good looks as most girls always are.

I watched him as he stepped away, swallowing the fear in my throat. Seconds
later he returned with beers for us, and I had swigged mine down quickly as
I stood quietly, holding myself up with the deck railing.

Minutes later the party became a blur. I only remember the noise of the
crowd, and Ryan occasionally handing me more beers. At one point, I knew
Todd was standing near us. But I only remained next to that railing,
holding myself up, afraid to move.


I don't even know how it happened, but minutes later clarity filled my head
as a slap of a hand crashed across my face. Blood rushed from my nose, as I
looked up and realized I was now out in the backyard, in the dark
shadows. Another fist slammed into my temple and I fell to the ground.

"I knew you would be back here, you fucking faggot." Ryan's voice was easy
to recognize as he crouched next to me.

"Where is Sarah," I whispered as I spit blood from my mouth and tried to
push myself up.

"She's fine. Your little girl likes cock just about as much as you,
faggot." I felt his hand reach into the back waistband of my jeans as he
pulled me up, throwing me back further into the shadows and slamming me up
against the wooden privacy fence. The house seemed so far away from us, as
Ryan stepped in front of me and pressed his body into mine. Once again, I
felt the crush of his mouth close over mine and his tongue shove deep into
my mouth.

"Fucking queer," he whispered into my ear. "Didn't take long for the
ruffies to work on you and your cunt girlfriend. She's a horny bitch! Todd
took her up to my room for a nice long fuck, so I think it's time you get
to work on my cock out here!" His hands pressed my shoulders and I went to
my knees, and his cock aimed out at my mouth. As I opened my lips, I did
what I had to do once again.

I don't even know how long it took, but when I started to cough and spit, I
could see the thick cum I had spit out on the ground around my knees. I
heard the speedo being pulled back up Ryan's thighs, and saw him start to
walk back toward the house. The only thing that registered in my drugged
brain was to get to Sarah.

Running across the lawn, I tore into the house, flying through the kitchen
and living room, to the stairs in the foyer. The crowd seemed to move for
me, as I plowed through them, and tripped again and again climbing the
stairs. It was the second door that I opened when I finally found her.

Daniel's arms seem to envelop me, as I felt his hard chest pressed against
my face. as my face pressed against him. My tears poured out, and I feel
safe for the first time tonight. God, I lost everything.

"Hey," he whispers, "you can't go into the house like this. Come on."
Removing his plaid shirt, he hands it to me so I can wipe the tears from my
face. Guiding me with his arm we begin to walk back toward the barn. All
the while, the image off Sarah fills my head.

The light in that room was dim, but on the bed Todd was easy to
recognize. His body was a mass of brown muscles, and he loomed large over
the person beneath him. The only sound was of his panting, as he
rhythmically moved his hips back and forth, and I saw that familiar large
brown cock of his push in and out of the ass receiving him. The body under
him was white and slender, the blonde hair cascaded over the bare back, but
the face was silent, the eyes closed. Sarah.

The next sound was his cock as it popped out of her asshole. I seemed to
see him move, but my body stayed frozen in the doorway as I stared at my
Sarah who laid silently still on her stomach. His fist connected with my
face and I crumbled to the floor, while the door slammed shut an I saw Ryan
turn the lock.

"You fucking faggot!" Todd's face was next to mine and I felt his hands
clamp around my neck, lifting me up and tossing me onto the bed, landing
partially on Sarah. I tried to reach and hold her, but my arms were soon
tossed behind me, as I felt something secure my wrists, and my pants pulled
for me.

"Yeah, teach that bitch a lesson," Ryan said behind me, as his spit landed
on my back and ass. The bed shifted as Todd's smooth brown muscular thigh
straddled Sarah again.

I heard the pumping as Todd's breath quickened. Seconds later pain seared
through my ass as a familiar pressure tore at my hole. The entire bed
seemed to rock as both of my rapists proceeded to take Sarah and us as
their victims.  Todd, fucking my Sarah, and Ryan, back between my legs.

I don't know how long it lasted, but it only stopped for seconds as they
changed positions, and the pain of my hole seemed to double when Todd's
massive cock took over me ass. The sound of slapping flesh seemed to fill
the room, and slowly I heard Todd and Ryan whisper moans of pleasure.

"This bitch is passed out!" Ryan climbed off Sarah and the pain left my
hole as I was flipped to my back. Seconds later Ryan's ass lowered onto my
mouth, as he straddle my face, and rubbed his hard cock onto my chest. I
knew I had no choice as I pushed my tongue forward, pleasuring his hole. I
felt my legs being raised and Todd's dick plunged back into my hole.

Suddenly there was struggling above me, and I gasped for air as his ass
lifted off of my face! When I opened my eyes I could see through Ryan's
legs as he grappled with Todd. They seemed to struggle, but Ryan forced his
mouth onto Todd' and the resistance stopped as Todd reached forward and
they passionately began to kiss over me, while his cock shoved so deep into
my hole I cried out. In seconds I felt my ass fill with his cum, as Ryan's
cock spontaneously burst onto my stomach.

Behind the barn I lean against the cement wall and shrug out of my
jacket. I look over to see Daniel's bare back as he leans in and turns on
the shower faucets. I forcefully tear my jeans from my body and walk
directly under the steaming water, anxious to wash the sin from my body!

The soap and lather cover my chest and arms as I lean forward using my
hands to support myself. I look up into the showerhead and feel the water
pour over my face, running down my body. Looking into the star filled night
sky, my body relaxes finally and I feel Todd's cum I have been holding in
me begin to slide from my ass hole and run down my thighs.

I ache for everything I've lost. My high school years, my freshman year of
college, my innocence, my girlfriend. I know when I left that bedroom, she
was awake and mumbling to me, but I never said a thing to her. I had to get
away from her, from Ryan, from Todd, from that house, from everything.

I feel support as I lean back and let the tears and pain flow from my
body. I feel hands holding me up as I close my eyes and shut out the
pain. I feel the hands washing the blood off my chest, the dried cum from
my body. I feel my worthless cock betraying me again, as I keep staring up
into the stars. How could this have happened to me?  How could Ryan and
Todd have raped me once more? I feel the familiar pressure at the lips of
my ass, I feel the shame pour over me.

The head seems to slide in so easy now. My sphincter allows the shaft to
slickly move up into me. Goose bumps burst across my skin, and I feel my
body react by pressing back against the wall of flesh behind me. There is
no pain, but instead a rush of tingles emanating from my hole.

"I am not gay. I am not gay." I whisper the words as my body involuntarily
takes over. Bending at the waist, I feel warm water coat my back, and the
sensations between my legs increases. Pressure at my waist holds me in
place, and flesh behind me seems to press into me as I hear a moaning sound
above the rush of the water.

My hole is hot, and tingles with vibration as my whole body starts to
quiver.  The moans are coming from me, and I shift my legs, anxious to
increase the sensation inside my ass. I can see my rigid cock bouncing, and
a set of lips and a tongue on my back licking me. I reach forward holding
the wall, and bending further, wanting the feeling in my ass to tear
through my entire body!

"Oh my GOD!"

The words come from my side as I turn my head. Blinking the water from my
eyes I see through the steam, a shadow by the side of the barn. Shirtless,
with moonlight reflecting through the thin cotton drawstring pants, I see
the shadow is my little brother Josh.

"Fuck!" I hear another voice behind me, as the pressure in my hole
instantly changes to pain, and the familiar pull of a cock sliding out of
me!

Standing and turning under the water, I look into Daniel?' eyes. Daniel was
fucking me?! Turning back in shock I look at Josh, and he spins and runs
around the corner of the barn.

Running, the gravel tears at my bare feet, as I pursue at Josh. Every cell
in my body burns with energy as I throw myself forward, I HAVE to stop him
before he makes it to the house! We both hit the grassy lawn as we slam
together and I land on top of him.

Fury burns through me as I straddle my brother and begin to hit at his
body. The water dripping from me makes his skin slick as I pound into his
muscular structure. I have to stop him from his thoughts, I have to make
him forget what he has seen in the shower. He struggles beneath me, and I
hear the tear of his pants as we wrestle on the lawn, more blows to his
side, his fists slamming my chest. I can feel his skin under mine, and I
feel his cock as it rigidly slaps against mine. My fists pummel him, and
his body shakes under me. Betrayal courses through my body as I grasp at
his neck, squeezing! Our eyes lock in fear, and our bodies convulse. The
cum from our cock sprays up onto our faces as our balls empty all of their
seed onto each other.

Only the sound of crickets seem to fill the night air of our family farm.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Hope you are enjoying the story. Eric is battling to understand himself,
and now his sexuality seems to have involved his own brother.  He feels the
need to leave the farm forever. Lets see where his life leads. You can
email with your comments, questions, or whatever.  Send them to
mheast111@hotmail.com