Date: Mon, 1 Feb 2010 19:39:12 -0500 From: S Smith Subject: I'm Not Gay....Am I Chapter 8 Warning: The usual disclaimers apply here. If you don't like any of the following, leave now: gay sex, vulgar or harsh language, etc. This is pure fiction. No one in this story is a real person, living or deceased. Please do not copy without my consent. Please practice safe sex. Subject: I?m Not Gay? Am I? Chapter 8 The smell of fresh cut grass fills my nose as I blink open my eyes and see the bright sunlight shining on my bed. A warm breeze is blowing across my bare chest, and I stretch myself awake. But I feel a sudden rip of pain throughout my rib cage and freeze in place. Looking down I see my skin is covered with scraps and bruises. Even my hands are criss-crossed with scratch marks, and my head is pounding with dull pain. What happened to me?! Wait a second! This is my bedroom back on the farm! What the FUCK am I dong here?!! My mind races as I try to push myself up from the bed. What am I doing HOME?! How did I get here?! "Mom! Mom!" I holler, but hear only silence in return. I lean forward, but again my rib cage burns with pain, and my head feels like it's full of cement. I lean back onto the pillows trying to relax and at least feel the comfort of the sun and breeze again on my skin, but my mind races with confusion. What is happening?! I was at college! I had a dorm room. I lived with Jeff. Jeff would help me, but where is he? When did I see him last? I had just gotten home from the gym and.... Oh wait.... Jeff... oh god I told him I was moving out. Exhausted I lean back into the pillows and try to calm myself. I need to remember..... Jeff. He fills my mind. I can see him clearly. I know him and every inch of his body after living with him for a year. Every time I think of him I remember those first days when I met him. I knew then my hope for college was over. College had been my chance to re-start. To have a new life and get away from my sick temptations. I was going there to be free of the confusion. But there in our room had stood the epitome of more temptation. Seriously, it would be difficult for anyone to live with a man that looked like that. Jeff is the embodiment of the perfect handsome college guy. Intelligent, hilarious, charismatic, athletic. Actually handsome is not even the word for him. He's like a vision from an advertisement of shirtless college guys playing football. Anyone would be thrilled to have him as a roommate. Except for me. I knew living with a man like that would be impossible. How could I ever live with a man and completely avoid him? But he was charming and kind to me. He was the type of guy I ached to have as a friend all my years in high school. And we clicked instantly despite all the fear I had running through my head. But it was so difficult.... just like that first morning with him. "Good morning, roomie," Jeff's deep voice said that morning when we woke up in our dorm room. I remember I opened my eyes and there he was. In his bed, across the room, stretching his thick muscular arms over his head and yawning. His chest was smooth and white except for the dark small nipples. His pecs were mounded like muscular pillows and the ridges of his stomach showed his excellent abs. His sheets were pushed down to his waist revealing that sculpted chest. The air in my lungs completely evaporated in a gasp as I looked at the vision I would have to wake up with everyday. Just across the room laid a man that my entire body ached to taste. All I could think was how the hell am I going to wake up to a view like that for my entire sophomore year?? "Good morning," I mumbled, and stared instead at the ceiling above me. "Sleep well?" he responded, his voice chipper and happy for so early in the morning. "Yeah," I replied. "I'm going to go for my morning run! Feel like joining me?" he asked, as I heard his bed creak. When I looked over at him he was sitting up with only the sheet covering his waist. His legs hung over the side of the bed with a slight dusting of brown hair. The reminded me of Todd. "I don't run much. Mostly just do weights." I said, and looked away. "Yeah, I can tell you do the gym, but how about joining me for a run instead? I can show you the campus," he replied. "Nah, you go ahead," was my response. "Guess what? I work at the gym as a trainer. You lucked out, roomie! You get free personal trainer services," he said and winked at me. In my mind I wondered just what all those services entailed as I envisioned him and I in a gym together tearing our clothes off each other and sinking to the floor in a wild embrace, licking and sucking. I snapped back to reality when I heard Jeff laugh and say "Dude, get your ass up. We got some running to do!" He tossed one of his pillows and it landed on my face. As I pulled the pillow down he smiled back at me and laughed, then stood up from his bed. My eyes took over and watched the sheet slide down his smooth white body. It was the first moment I knew my roommate liked to sleep naked. There he stood before me, muscled sculpted body and his thick limp dick swinging between his thighs. He was everything I had feared would be my roommate. The next few minutes were just a series of me in bed trying to act like I wasn't watching him as he moved through the room gathering up his gym clothes, talking to me, bending over so far at one point I could even see his rosebud hole. He was obviously confident. When he finally left for the showers it was the first time I reached between my legs and used Jeff in my mind. By the end of that first day we had run 4 miles, swam in the college pool for an hour, and finished with a 2 hour weight training workout in the gym. Needless to say I was exhausted. Sure I had worked the weights a lot at home on the farm, but I was not used to a full body workout. That night he had a date with his new girlfriend Christy and I went to bed early, my arms and legs throbbing from exertion. I woke up the 2nd morning still in a dull ache and heard Jeff's loud laugh coming from across the room as I winced in pain trying to sit up. "You sore, roomie?! Jeff laughed, and smiled at me from his bed. "Fuck, yes!" I replied in my deep morning voice. "Well, I hope that won't scare you away," he replied. "From what?" I asked, staring back at him. Once again he was shirtless in his bed with only the sheets covering his waist. "From the workout! It'll get better. You did pretty good actually. It won't be long and you'll be as good as me!" He said, smiling like a doctor with a new patient. "I bet by the spring semester you will be looking like me!" I had already knew after one day with him that the gym was apparently his passion. And he was eager to make me his new experiment to use his training expertise on. Daily I would either watch him run ahead of me as we jogged, or see him swim next to me in the pool, or flex his muscles at the gym using the weights with me. I hated it, but yet if there was one thing I wanted, it was to be in excellent physical shape. I thought the stronger I could be the more control I had over myself. That was the beginning week for my transformation. Jeff was relentless as he pushed me each day to go to the gym. There were no exceptions, and he refused to hear any complaints as he forced me to go through rigorous routines. My body actually started to transform within only a few weeks which seemed to make him even more motivated. I already had a good start from my home gym back on the farm, but this was an entire other level. It was all body workouts of swimming, running, aerobics, and intensive weight training. He changed my diet even and made sure my schedule was adjusted to always include time in each day for a workout. When I looked in the mirror I started to see the changes that literally astounded me. The view was the inspiration I needed to keep up the routines even thought it made me face Jeff daily in the showers, at the gym, and in the pool. Yes, the temptation of Jeff seemed to always be around me except for the nights he crashed with Christy in her room. Each day the same thing. Jeff climbing out of bed nude. Jeff shaving in the dorm restrooms nude. Jeff in our room nude taking too long to get dressed. Jeff naked in the locker room. Jeff at the pool in his tiny speedo that was so small he might as well have been nude! It was torture. But when I thought I could not take another second of him, something wonderful would happen because of him. Not only was he my workout buddy, he became my friend. And all of his friends became my buddies. My sophomore year seemed to fly by, with a mix of parties, workouts, studies and just complete college fun. It was my dream of college coming true, except for having to live with a man that made me ache to taste men again. Then, late one afternoon I was on my way back to the dorm and was passing through the halls in the business wing and everything changed. I saw the familiar shape and color of the Pride flag hanging on a classroom door. Instantly I felt my skin crawl. Gay pride. All it reminded me of was the attacks. Of the bullying threats. Of the sickness that had controlled my life. The sign said, "LGBT Council Meeting in Progress". It was my first realization that there was even such a group in the school, and it made me freeze in place. Instead of walking on I stepped forward and peered through the small window in the door and saw a group sitting in a circle of chairs. The sight of those faggots made my stomach churn and I turned to run, but I slammed into someone standing directly behind me. "Sorry," I mumbled as I looked at the young guy who struggled to stand up from the floor where he had fallen. "It's ok," he mumbled in reply, brushing his clothes off and looking at me through the hair in his eyes. I recognized him. A classmate from my Finance class. I had seen him quite a few times and had wondered if he was gay. He had such cute stylish brown hair that I wanted to push my hands through. His physique was lean and obviously sculpted from weights. His clinging v-neck was cut deep showing most of his smooth pecs, and his crystal blue eyes stared at me just a few seconds too long. "Coming in?" He said to me and nodded to the door that held the LGBT sign. "No! Just was looking for another room," I replied, and stepped past him. "Hey, it's cool. You can come in," he said, and smiled at me. "I'm not queer," I responded. "Ok. But if you ever want to run into me again, come by my room anytime." He winked suggestively and ripped a piece of paper from the notebook in his hand. I watched silently as he scribbled out "Steve" and "23D", and stuffed it in my right front pants pocket as I stood silently feeling his fingers inside my pocket. His fingers remained and I let him trace the outline of my cock as we stood there. I flushed with anger when he pulled his hand from me, turned and went into the LGBT meeting. My mind raced with questions. "Who the hell did he think he was?! Did he just touch me because he thinks I am gay?!! I was furious and wanted to go in that meeting room, grab him by the throat and tell him what a faggot he was! "Eric!" The voice calling me came from the end of the hallway woke me from my rage. Karen Jeffers had been after me for weeks for a date. Impulsively I felt the words in my mouth as I envisioned screaming at her for stopping me from attack on the queer losers in the LGBT room. But as Karen smiled coyly at me I remember feeling like I was at a crossroads. Turn to the left, go into that room and speak my mind. Or turn to my right, and go to the end of the hallway to a girl who offered me a way back to my real straight self. I went right. Right down that hallway and took Karen in my arms. I never even spoke a word, but instead I filler her mouth with my probing tongue and pressed my hard cock against her. Apparently it was just what she wanted because she returned the kiss as strongly as I had given it to her. That night was our first date, and for the next 3 weeks we were constantly together until finally I we decided we were officially a couple. Karen Jeffers was my first girlfriend since junior high school. I finally decided then it was time to tell Jeff. "You got a girlfriend?!" Jeff said, staring at me in shock in our dorm room one night. "Yup!" I laughed, as I turned from him and felt my cheeks reddened. "I wondered where you been lately. So who is she?" Jeff laughed out as he looked up at me from the sofa. His rounded smooth pecs bulged so nicely they caused a shadow over his lined abs. He looked absolutely adorable and part of me wondered how I could have a girlfriend when I lusted to just taste Jeff's skin. "Karen Jeffers," I said, and turned away from him to pull off my briefs and wrap a fresh towel around my waist. "Oh yeah, I know her. She's pretty! Good job, roomie!" "I need to shower quick. Taking her to a movie tonight," I said, anxious to get out of the room. "Hey! Let's make it a double date! I'll bring Christy, and we'll go with you!" "Um, well, yeah I guess," I replied, and kept moving. I walked to the dorm showers and didn't look back, hoping I could be alone. Anything to get away from Jeff while he was looking so cute in only his briefs. Once I was inside the showers I quickly turned the knobs so jets of cold water would blast my skin. But Jeff climbed in behind me and used a faucet near me on the same wall. I had to turn and hide my cock because once again it betrayed me with him so close. Even though I showered with him almost daily it was still a struggle to control my betraying cock. "We could take 'em to the movies, and swing by the pub for some drinks after. Let's get them drunk and see what we can get!" He laughed as he soaped himself up. He looked like the typical college guy, horny and ready to screw any girl he could get his hands on. "Nah, let's just do the movie," I protested as I kept my back to him and lathered myself. "Dude! Come on! You need to get laid! Let's try to get some tonight! His hand slapped my ass cheek as he laughed loudly. "Nah.... just a movie tonight," I replied as inside my head the voices screamed at me for loving the way he had touched my ass. "Eric! Come on! You need pussy! And so do I," his voice replied from behind me with more laughter. "We'll see," I replied, and cut my shower short with a quick rinse. As Jeff hoped the girls easily went along with his plan. The drinks worked like a charm and both of them eagerly accepted his request to swing back by our dorm for a couple more drinks before calling it a night. Karen seemed as fixated on Jeff as Christy was, and I seemed to just be watching them the whole night. But I was floating with happiness. Not only did I finally have a girlfriend, but I had my buddy Jeff there. And despite how hot he looked in his tight button down shirt and butt clinging jeans, I maintained control and decided this would be my first night to finally make my move with Karen the second Jeff left to go back to Christy's dorm room. But Jeff had other plans because he wasted no time making his moves on Christy when we got back to our room. She seemed to have no qualms about the intense kissing they shared on Jeff's bed as Karen and I sat on my bed looking embarrassed as we drank large stiff vodkas I had made us. In the dim room, the scene was quite romantic for Jeff if he and Christy had been alone. But with Karen and I there, the awkwardness grew with each minute. Then it happened. I heard a zipper and I knew the sound immediately. "You want to feel it, baby?" Jeff's deep voice filled the room despite him whispering. "Yessss....." Christy cooed as her hand slipped into his jeans and began to rub his bulge. My eyes were riveted on them as they proceeded without a concern for Karen and I. "Oh god, that feels good..." Jeff said and started to unbutton his shirt. My eyes focused on him as I slowly watched his chest come in view and he let his shirt slide down his thick, muscled arms. Even though I had seen Jeff shirtless every day for the past school year, this moment was different. It was sexual and I was watching him use his seduction powers the seemed to control all of us. Without hesitation Christy eagerly moved her mouth to his chest and tasted him like I had wanted to for months. "Shouldn't we leave?" Karen whispered to me, but she too was just as fascinated as she watched my roommate boldly undress and reveal his body. Jeff was someone I guess everyone wanted to see without his clothes on. I had no reply, but instead started to mimic my roommate, unbuttoning my own shirt and pulling it off as Jeff looked over and winked his encouragement to me. He wanted me to do the same as him, and I willingly followed his actions. I watched his hands open the flaps of his jeans and his impressive cock flopped out into view. Karen's eyes were focused just as much as mine were on that large dick and Christy gripped it. Immediately I moved to release my swelled cock from the confines of my pants and briefs. "Come on baby, taste this instead," he moaned out, pushing Christy down his chest to his waiting dick. She glanced over and Karen and I, and apparently my state of undress was enough to encourage her to move forward. She took his cock and wrapped her red lips around his stiff meat. The ache I felt for the same sensations made me shove Karen down to repeat the act on me. She seemed to hesitate, but I shoved my hips forward, anxious to feel what Jeff was feeling. To share the moment with him. "Yeah, come on, suck our cocks!" Jeff's voice was louder as he started to thrust into Christy who seemed even more hungry as she held his bare ass in her hands while feeding on his dick. "Yeah, take it Karen - come on, take it!" I said louder as I pushed myself to be just as aggressive as Jeff, while I watched Christy lick and suck on Jeff. The sexual heat in my eyes made me grab Karen and force her to take me all into her mouth. Jeff smiled over at me, obviously happy with the scene he had created. His hands pulled at Christy's top which easily came off and revealed her large tits. He looked at me and nodded toward Karen with a smirk, encouraging me to do the same to her. Once I pulled her top off and unhooked the bar he licked his lips as he watched her tits appear. I knew at that moment the whole scene was for him. Jeff and Christy stopped only long enough to remove the rest of their clothing, and then resume their positions with Jeff standing with his back to us and Christy kneeling to feed on him again. I turned my back to them, trying to push them from my mind as I shoved my pants to the floor and stepped out of them while Karen kept up her impressive sucking. The sensation on my cock was incredible and quickly brought back the images of Todd in my mind. I squeezed my eyes shut and pushed the memories away, while I forced myself even further down my girl's throat. I pushed away Todd's image the harder I pounded her mouth, and in the midst of my wild pumping I suddenly felt a brush of skin on my bare ass. My eyes flew open as I realized the movement against me from behind was the smooth hard muscled ass of Jeff! We were back to back feeding our girls, but in our tiny dorm room our rounded asses touched! And the more I thrust in and out of Karen's mouth the more I came in contact with Jeff. Karen disappeared from my mind and I willingly stepped back and pulled my cock out of her mouth until only just the head was rubbing on her lips. I wanted more of the sensations on my ass, just to feel the flesh of Jeff touching me. I became transfixed, and instead of pressing forward I pressed back, and ground myself to Jeff. His muscales were so hard and he seemed to return my action as the rubbing between became more intense. "Put it in me", Christy moaned out behind me and woke up my mind. I stopped moving and turned to look. Christy had laid on her back on Jeff's bed with her legs open wide to reveal her wet pussy. The image made my stomach flip. I turned back to Karen on her knees and looked down. "Let me fuck you," I said as I reached and pulled her up to face me. But the sight of Christy in her vulgar position seemed to shock Karen too who instantly grabbed up her blouse, held it to her bare tits and moved toward the doorway. I stood silently and watched her try to leave. "Where you going, baby?" Jeff voice said softly behind me. As he walked over to Karen and pulled her into his arms I watched silently while her arms embraced him. It seemed the most natural thing in the world for Jeff to hold my girlfriend. And to see her willingly drop her blouse and press her bare breasts against his sculpted chest. Her hands clung to him, feeling his muscled back and his hands caressed her ass. When their mouths met and their tongues wrapped together, I focused on his cock that pressed to her thigh. "I should go" I heard Karen whisper as her hands reached and held Jeff's hard cock. But instead of her leaving, Jeff stepped back allowing her to stroke him and he pressed on her shoulders. She slipped willingly to the floor and took his beautiful cock into her mouth without hesitation. I wanted anger to fill me, but instead I felt excitement as I watched my roommate command the room. All of us wanted him. "Hey roomie, do me a favor and fuck my girl for me," he said casually smiling at me as he gripped the sides of Karen's face and started to fuck her willing mouth. I looked over at Christy and knew I had to do what he wanted me to do. Hell at that moment I would do anything for Jeff. Without a thought I walked to her, positioned myself between her spread legs and posed the tip of my cock at her wet pussy lips. Christy took control and wrapped her legs around me, and drew me in so that my cock slipped inside her easily. I remember looking down in shock and realized that I was fucking Jeff's girl, the warm wrapped around my cock felt good and there w as something about the fact that my cock was in the exact space the Jeff's had been many times. "Yeah, come on, Eric!" Christy screamed out. I willing grabbed her hips and started to pound Jeff's girlfriend until I heard moans behind me. I continued to thrust but I turned my head and looked to see Jeff and Karen in my bed, her legs spread wide with him pistoning in and out of her. The site of his hard ass flexing on my bed pushed me to the edge as my cum boiled inside of me. But I wanted Jeff to see me cum. I looked down in revulsion at Christy who stared up at me desperate for my cock to be shoot inside her. I mumbled "no" and back away from her dripping pussy. Then I felt the warmth behind me. Skin touching mine, and words flowed into my ear. "Come on Eric, give it to her," his voice whispered in my ear. Jeff had left Karen laying on my bed, just to push me back to finish his girl. I felt his hand on the small of my back and once again his voice in my ear. "Go on, buddy, fuck her." I looked into his eyes and saw his eager smile while his right arm encircled my waist, holding me as he guided me back to her. My left arm reached around him and I closed my eyes as I smelled the sweat on his skin. I loved the feel of our flesh so close as we stood side by side. Roommates and friends. My mouth touched his neck and my lips brushed against his skin. My tongue eagerly tasted him. The salty sweat of his body covered my lips and tongue as I moved my hips forward and started to fuck Christy again. The more I fucked the more I licked him, and kissed his neck, while his arm stayed tight around my waist. I reached with my right arm and rubbed his pecs as I wildly sucked and kissed more of his neck and the cum burst from me and filled the wet pussy I fucked. "Yeah! Good job, roomie!" Jeff laughed out, as he pulled me back into his arms and removed me from his girlfriend. I turned and leaned into him, grasping onto so that I held him in my arms. My wet hard cock pressed into his leg as I struggled to hold onto him, but my knees gave way and I began to slip to the floor. I landed on my knees, and opened my eyes to see Jeff's semi hard cock hanging in front of me. Once again I was in front of my temptation. I had gone all this school year and kept control but here I was again. And I wanted it! I leaned forward and my mouth sucked the tip of his cock. The taste was perfect and I quickly gripped his hips and held in place as I swallowed his entire cock to the back of my throat. He tasted of piss, cum and sweat and I loved it. I knew everyone in the room was seeing me do this terrible sickening thing, but I had no control. I wanted him as badly as I wanted Todd, but instead he moved and pulled his cock from my mouth... "No buddy, none of that," he whispered and he stepped away from me. I watched in silence on my knees as he climbed into his bed, laid on top of Christy and slide his wet dick into her. As I knelt there watching, Karen dressed behind me and went toward the door, but I was too frozen in place to go and stop her. I hated myself for what I had done and yet I could not bring myself to stop watching. Every thrust, every movement held me in place as I watched Jeff do to Christy what my body longed for him to do to me. It wasn't until I heard Jeff moaning out Christy's name that I realized the moment was over....that he was filling her pussy with his cum and that I had just sucked his cock like a typical faggot. Within seconds I was dressed and standing outside in the hallway, and felt terror grip me as realized Jeff may know of my sexual confusion. My mind screamed, while my body ached to go back in that room and taste more of him. I ran down the hall to the dorm lobby, ignoring the stares from the passing students. Once I was inside the elevator I moved as if on autopilot. It wasn't until I was outside 23D that I finally remembered his name. Steve. "Hi", he said as he stood before me shirtless and his hair hung in his gorgeous blue eyes. "Can we talk?" I said as I looked up and down the hallway, afraid to be seen. "Sure," he replied, and opened his door wide. I scanned his room and saw 2 empty beds. "Where's your roommate?" I asked. "With his girlfriend," was his reply. Silently I started to undress and he did the same. When he stepped close to kiss me, I pushed back and shoved him to his bed. Unlike Ryan and Todd, this guy knew exactly what he wanted as he climbed onto his bed on all fours and spread his hole for me. He was like Christy - just a hole to hold my cock. Except this hole would be my Jeff. I closed my eyes and moved forward to fuck my roommate in my mind as the faggot took my cock up his ass. I gripped his hips and pounded him over and over - I fucked his hole and used him as nothing more than my bottom boy. Honestly that experience was blank for me. I remember the excitement of being with a guy again. But beyond that it's only a flash of images of me plowing into him, sounds of moaning pleasure, views of my rigid cock, his hole, and my terror as I snuck out his door later. Afraid that someone would see me leave the room of a known queer. It was 3 days before I saw Jeff again, because each day I stayed out of the room until long after he went to bed and left early each morning. There was nowhere I felt safe anymore. Not with Jeff, not with my friends who were all Jeff's friends, and certainly not with that Steve guy. But eventually I knew I would have to face Jeff again. So on the third day I went to the residential hall director and asked to be moved for the junior year. Sophomore year was about to end, and I knew I could never face another year with Jeff. When I finally came home that night after the gym he was at his desk studying. Only the desk lamp was on in the dark room, and the light reflected off his skin. And there was a faint mark my mouth had left on his neck. "HEY! How you been roomie?!" He said, and smiled broadly. "Around," I replied, as I started to change my clothes. "What happened to you? Last I saw you were about to fuck Karen. Where did you two go that night? Back to her room?" He acted oblivious to what had truly happened. He had not been drunk that night. He knew what I had done. He knew I had watched him do Christy! He knew that bruise on his neck was from me! "I told the director to re-assign me next year. I'm moving to the academics dorm floor." I said quickly. "WHAT?" Jeff voice was the loudest I had ever heard it, as he stood up from his desk and violently shoved his chair back. "Sorry," I said, and stepped out of my pants to get ready for a quick shower. "That is bullshit! You study all the fucking time! You don't need the academics floor. And what the FUCK am I supposed to do about a roommate?!" Jeff said, and threw his pen across the room. "Talk to the director. He said he would put you with Jack since Leo is graduating Sunday." I replied casually, without looking at him. "You fucking little bastard!" His yell pierced through me as his hands violently grabbed and spun me around to face him. "Stop it!" I said, and turned away from his face and the mark on his neck. Jeff shoved me first, but I returned the attack and in seconds we were in the middle of the floor in a wrestle. After all our workouts over the past year I matched him pound for pound and almost muscle for muscle. With each hold he would take, I would deflect and return to pin him. We grunted and fought, no fists, only shoving and gripping each other until finally I slammed my foot into his chest ands scrambled away from him. His final grip was a hand on my briefs that ripped and pulled down my legs. Seconds later I stood in the hallway dressing with the clothes I grabbed and running to the dorm lobby. "Hey. What you need?" Steve said as he opened the door marked "23D" a few minutes later. "You alone?" I mumbled in reply, and scanned the hall way to see if any of the passing students would recognize me. "Nah, but hang on. I will grab some shoes and be right out," he said as he shut his door. Within seconds he was beside me walking down the hallway. "Sorry, my roommate was home. Want to go to your room?" "No. Come on" I said as I led him to the elevator, down to the lobby and out the main doors. We only made it as far as the gym building before I pulled him back into the shadows of the bushes on the side lawn and started tasting my temptation. I didn?t hold back, but instead I used Steve as my Jeff again. His shirt came off easily and in the spring night air it felt good to feel his flesh. I was on my knees before he could even unzip, and within seconds I was back to doing what I knew how to do. Panting we both slipped back into our clothes and started to walk back toward the dorms crossing the university campus. Steve kept talking to me, but I don't remember anything he said, other than I wanted him to shut up. Then he grabbed me and took me into his arms right there in the middle of campus and kissed me. I returned the kiss dreaming of Jeff in my arms instead. "Hey look! Faggots! The words pierced the night air and I remember the lump in my throat as I we separated looked to see4 large guys surrounding us. The darkness made them only shadows, and the fear was palpable. A fist flew out and I fell to the ground. Boots and shoes hit my chest and legs while I heard Steven crying beside me. The last sight was seeing his bloodied face as he dropped to the ground next to me, his eyes wide open and he laid motionless. Blackness swallowed us. I don't remember another besides a siren, a nurse, and my Mom in a chair next to me while I was in a bed. And now I am here. The bright sun on my childhood bed back on the farm, my body bruised, and the bandage on my right temple. "Hey." I look to the voice in my door and standing there is my little brother, Josh. "What am I doing here?" I reply, as I reach down and pull the sheet up over my chest. "Mom and Dad brought you home yesterday. You were pretty outta it. Probably the pain pills." Josh replied as he moved to my bed and started to pull my covers down. We both look down at my bruise covered body. "What are you doing?!" I say, my voice raising as I struggle to sit up. "Mom said I should help you shower before she gets back home," he replies casually as he starts to lift me. Pain pounds my body, as I lean on him and we begin to slowly move out on the room and down the hall. In the bathroom he leans me against the wall and I close my eyes. The faucets squeak as they turn, water splashes on the ceramic tub, and steam envelopes me. I don't open my eyes until I feel my briefs being pulled down my legs. In front on me on his knees is my Josh. Everything I have done has brought me right back here. To this moment. To Josh. Everything has led me right back to my temptation. "Josh, no....." I say as I look at him staring at my XXXX. "No...no...no...." I repeat as my Josh stares at my cock and starts to lean toward me. TO BE CONTINUED... Hope you are enjoying the story. I hope you will stick with Eric and see how his live moves forward. Each of his experiences is helping him learn more about himself as he tries to understand his desires. I hope you will stick around and continue to enjoy some pleasure like I do when I write about Eric. You can email with your comments, questions, or whatever. Send them to mheast111@hotmail.com.