Date: Tue, 25 Oct 2022 05:25:23 +1100 From: max dowling Subject: Kasey with a k / chapter 36 Adam 36 Maxieplus I had cleaned the cabin thoroughly and short of cleaning the windows, I think I did a pretty good job. I reset the fire and even washed the sheets which we didn't use, but it was all refreshed and ready for the next tenant. I am going to ask Mr. Walsham if I could buy it, but I doubt the family will want to let it go, like me it's too precious to those who knew my Adele. I know Sam loved it here and of course, Kasey will fall in love with it when he gets back. He kind of likes nature a bit. Sam said a long goodbye to his new mates and even got a phone number, the invitation to come and stay on school holidays made him even more excited. I never dreamed that this is the life he would want, but when I thought about it the apartment doesn't hold the adventures he could have up here, so I am going to offer to buy it. With a tear in my eye and a slow careful drive down the hills, after saying my farewells to George and June. If they get together while I'm not here I won't be happy but they were laughing a lot more before I left. This holiday has been good for me, a time to recharge and a time for no regrets, Sam has this. I unloaded the car into a shopping trolly that has mysteriously appeared in our basement garage, which made my multiple journeys in the lift just one trip. The weather has turned cold and Autumn is passing very quickly, I will miss all the multi-colored trees in the hills. Sam and his mates had done a scavenger hunt one day and he collected many different colored leaves, we are going to press them into a scrapbook as soon as we buy one. The first thing I did was get the washing machine activated, there were a few messages on the phone, and I will ring mum as soon as I get a moment to myself, for now, Sam is familiarising himself with the remote control again. I opened the doors to air the place out then closed them because it was cold outside and the heating was set for winter so I wanted to keep the warmth in. I am lucky the heating is fantastic in this place a constant temperature was kept throughout the cold months. Food was produced and then I went downstairs to empty the letter box. There were a few for Kasey so I put them aside for his return, he has quite a stack now. Trish rang and we talked for a while as I made coffee and sat at the table to natter with her. She said she was on top of everything and I'm not to come in unless I needed to, I told her I needed a good scrub and haircut I had neglected my grooming these past weeks. I made an appointment at her salon and then I rang Sam's kindy and told them he would be in on Monday, they asked me if there was any news on Kasey but unfortunately, I didn't have any. I guess I should ring dad, Kasey has to take most of the blame for this mess I can't put it all on dads shoulders. I hung the washing out and then started unloading the trolley of its contents. I pottered around for a while then sat with my son to watch the news. "Dad, can we get a fire?" "No son, it wouldn't work up here too dangerous.' "But we can put it on the balcony and warm our feet." "That would be lovely son, let me think about it." "Okay daddy, but it would be good for us for winter." "It would son but we have to be careful." "Have we got more blankets?" "Yes, plenty in the cupboards." "Good because I like camping out." I didn't see it before, or I didn't want to see it, Sam's history would have been all campfires and blankets no wonder he slept well up at the cabin, he was reliving a memory in his young life. "We will get a chiminea son, they are the best." "What is it, daddy?" "A Mexican firebox, or better still we maybe will go and look at gas fire pits on the weekend." "We have to get wood daddy." "Okay a chiminea it is, you can pick it out." He went to bed early again I guess he was a little excited because he was telling Billy that we were going to have a campout. I talked to mum for ages and she was over the moon I maybe had turned the corner, my dummy spits were all forgotten. Briefly, I spoke to dad, I wanted to apologize but didn't because I am too stubborn. He said he had no news and then he did say the ship that exploded may have been Kasey's work, some detonators were missing from the facility they have over there. But that was all he could confirm so we sit and wait, maybe we will never find out what happened to him, maybe he is laying at the bottom of the ocean. I lost my mojo and cried that night, and when Sam crawled in with me I knew once again everything would be okay. He had invited Billy over to his camp night when he knows it was going to happen, and then he dragged me down to the car early, he had some shopping to do. Saturday morning at the big hardware shop is the pits and finding a salesman is virtually impossible, so we muddled through the wide range of heating options. Sam's excited face said it all, he was happy, and I explained how the things worked and he picked the biggest Chiminea he could find, I had my doubts that in this case, the biggest isn't always the best, my mind went back to Kasey's body and I started to rise. "Now can I help you, Sam?" A man looked at my son. "Hello Mr. Ben, yes I need the biggest fire you have." He looked at me and I said. "Adam pleased to meet you, Mr Ben." "Pleased to meet you at long last Adam, we do drop-offs together at kindy, my name is Ben and I know this young man through my son Mike." He smiled. "Of course Sam's best friend in the world, apart from Billy." "Yes, Billy the source of many conversations I think, now how can I help you both?" "We need a big camping-fire," Sam said. "Okay, tell me how big the space is, and will it be outdoors." He winked at me. "Of course outdoors a big outdoors and wood we need some wood." I laughed it felt good, Mr.Ben looked at me. "Okay he wants to go camping, we have a very large balcony on the ninth floor, and there is a lengthy gas heater above the seating area but that's not good enough, we want a campfire some wood, and some sleeping bags." Sam looked at me he had forgotten them. "You can have one with the security door, it will heat a ten-foot space in the middle of winter, but you will need really good bags and maybe a blanket or two." "Lead the way," I said. He showed Sam a nice mid-range chiminea it had a door attached to it for safety. "We will take that one." He didn't even ask the price. "Okay and some wood for how long?" "All night." Sam grinned. "Good, and some kindling and starter cubes." He wrote everything down. "Now Sam and Adam, the camping aisle is over there, I won't be a minute, will you need a gas lamp?" "Yes." Was spoken before I opened my mouth. I have been camping before with dad so I know what is needed, but I didn't want the whole kit and caboodle. "What size?" He stood us in front of the rolled-up bags and I think we have a choice of colors, green, green or green today. "We need a big one for my daddy and papa and me and maybe aunty Trish sometimes and uncle Evans." "That's a lot of people, maybe two big ones then." "That will be fine Ben," I answered this time. He picked out two big bags then organized wood, a lamp that was battery operated, and a bucket for washing up, Sam's childhood memories again. "Delivery is free and the guy will set it up, but it won't be until Monday morning." "That's fine, can we take the bags with us?" Sam's in charge again. "Of course and I will organize two big bags of wood, that will last you a week or so depending on how much you use it. I dropped nearly five hundred dollars in that shop but I doubt Sam was concerned with the prices, we did get a Mr.Ben discount which made my wallet feel better. Before returning home we had to call into the supermarket to get hot dogs and buns and some marshmallows, Sam had seen them being roasted on tv and wanted to try them. I unpacked the car once again and used the trolley to haul it upstairs, I quietly thanked the person that had left it. I also noted that the door on my storage cage was open, I usually don't lock it because I never use it but it's there if the other tenants need to. I closed it up and saw some old blankets strewn about. I didn't clean it up I just wanted to get into the warmth of the apartment and will talk to John the janitor when I see him next. Unpacking the trolly I placed it next to the front door to be taken down on my next trip, Sam had unpacked one sleeping bag and was struggling to get into it. "Hang on baby I will help you." I gave it a good shake he went to find pillows. When I unzipped it he jumped in and the tv went on. Sam would use this bag all through winter, and when Kasey gets home he will be in it with him, I suppose if I want a grope I will have to play along nicely. Dinner was served to my guests, mum, and Billy, they turned up unannounced Saturday night. Dad had flown to Canberra and she has decided she has left me alone for long enough. The kids screamed and hugged then Sam showed him his new digs so they played camping together. Mum and I finished off our meals with little conversation, but I know it has to be done. "Sorry mum, I am sorry all my sensible feelings flew out the window when Kasey left, and I do love you for giving me some space." "No need son, I wanted to be with you because I knew what you were going through, don't ever forget I went through the same thing several times with your father." "I know mum, but that was far from my thoughts. I just wanted to be alone. Thank you for taking Sam when you did, he is a wonderful little guy and he has been my rock because he knows his papa will be home soon. He is keeping me strong at the moment, this camping thing is to distract me, he's so young but has lived an old life I think." "He has, only God knows what he had to deal with in that camp." "Let us not dwell on it mum, want a wash and dry?' "I see your back son, and yes that would be most welcome." She jumped up and I went with her to do a good salon-style wash. Sam was rummaging through the pantry when I returned, I had wrapped mums hair into a towel and he screamed. "Daddy do mine, do Billys." So I sat mum down and went to find their special towels and made them a turban each, now they are truly camping Arab style. "What were you looking for baby?" "Something." "Would that something have to do with marshmallows?" His head spun around and he said. "Yes." Then he laughed. "Give me five minutes." They screamed. "How do I warm them up, I don't want them to burn their lips?" "Over the gas flame son, then leave them for a bit, chocolate goes well with them also." She giggled. I did that job and they sat quietly except for the lip-smacking sounds they were making. The dryer came out and I brushed mums hair into a nice everyday look, she didn't need a cut I suspect Trish or Eva had been attending to her while I was not available mentally. "There, all good to go." "Thank you son no one does it better than you." I kissed her cheek, We talked into the night the kids had long gone to sleep on the floor. I didn't cry much, and mum was holding off as she told me about her trials and her endurance. "I have to ring Kasey's mum and sister it's been too long." "Don't worry they understand, and I ring Marie regularly just to let her know how you are doing." "Thank you, another family I have to apologize to." "Well don't, they aren't expecting you to, anyway son my bed is calling but If you need me I can crawl in with you." "No need mum, I think I will crawl in with my awesome little brother and son." "You do that, goodnight." We hugged and she left while I turned the lights out, leaving a small lamp going in the entranceway, I crawled into the sleeping bag with the boys. Before I went to sleep I said a small prayer for Kasey, he must be feeling so lonely at the moment. (At the time Adam was turning out the lights of the apartment a dark figure crept into the basement car park, he found the cage and laid down gathering some rags about him. He was cold and so very tired, he had been out looking for someone, anyone that knew him, he only knew this is where he has to be to get his answers. He sighed and then fell into a deep sleep just as Adam said his prayers. In the morning he would be gone for the day, he had taken to begging on the streets to get a small meal or coffee, he was amazed at some people's generosity because usually a hamburger and drink would appear out of nowhere, as he sat freezing in Adams beloved laneways.) Adam slept well with his boys, and it was the tv that woke him up, there were cartoons to watch and they couldn't hold off any longer. They could have gone to Sam's bedroom to watch it, Adam wanted another half hour of rest before he started his day. "I believe we have a big mouse in the car park, Adam, do you have any ideas?" John cornered him when he went to pick up the boy's breakfasts from his downstairs cafe. "I noticed that John, I think he's set up home in my storage cage." "Adam I think that mouse is homeless, maybe a vet. I don't know your mind, but I would like to ignore it, for now, it's getting colder by the day and I guess by the rags I have seen, he's got nothing." "I like mice, and I have food and blankets which I will take down today, can I place a small radiator in there. There's a power plug in the unit?" "You do as you please my friend, that trolley he dragged in will come in very handy." he smiled at me. "It has, and I will deal with it as soon as mum gets on her way." "Thank you, so we are good?" "Good, John thank you." I know John is a Vietnam vet, we talked about it for ages when we used to have catch-ups, and If I didn't know any better that exit door has always been unlocked. I found a stack of spare blankets while I was telling mum about our new border, she suggested we tell the commander. His guys will have him sorted out in no time, maybe even get him some digs. I told her to leave it up to me, I needed a distraction, and maybe he's not ready to be helped as yet. I filled the trolley and we walked mum and Billy down to the basement, she checked out the cage, which was empty. I kissed her goodbye and watched them drive out of the car park. It's cold down here but not as cold as the streets and parks, so I placed the extra sleeping bag and blankets on the concrete floor, and I found an old army coat amongst Kasey's things and I know he wouldn't mind sharing it with the guy or girl. I also left a small blow heater I had in the cupboard, a leftover of living at Trisha's apartment block, I tested that it still worked and it was good to go. I put food and a thermos of coffee on the blankets for my guest to have, if he was hungry, then I pulled the door shut and left with the trolley. Sam had been jumping up and down because I had taken one of his new sleeping bags, but I said he would get it back, or we can buy another one. I then sat him down and told him all about the homeless people that walk our city streets, he was good to go after that, even reminding me sometimes I hadn't made any extra food or filled the thermos. He was full of suggestions like leaving money, letting our friend sleep in our spare room, things like that. I could have provided a place for him to stay but a nagging feeling tugged at my neck. What if Kasey was in the same position who would look after him, my mind went back to him and I know he would survive the streets, his pure determination would see him through. I didn't want to invite a stranger in, he could be deranged or shellshocked its hard to tell which kind of person he or she is. I explained this to Sam and he understood, so he never mentioned it again. I did get a delivery on Monday, the chiminea and wood arrived, there was no installation just the rules of having an open fire and some hints on how to light it. Sam will get a great surprise when he gets home and joy of joys, I can start sleeping outside like our vagrant. I rang Eva and we talked for some time, I had ignored her homecoming from her honeymoon to Bali. She was fine with everything and even loaded me up with work gossip which I drank in, I thought the only gossip going around the past eight weeks would have been about me. I diligently set the fire up and made sure the sky was clear, there's no way we can stay out here when it's raining heavily. I looked at the open space and thought I must get on with having the windows installed that would make it cozy. Sam was ready to go when we got home but the tv one out, in the end, he snuggled into his sleeping bag and I moved the chiminea out of the way with the wood. Maybe mum would like it for her outdoor space. If my son ever gets any more big ideas I will brain him. Tuesday I wanted to go see Mr. Walsham so after I dropped Sam off at kindy I headed his way. The old building still looked awesome as I was shown to his office. "You look a little better Adam, how was your holiday?" "I can't tell you how refreshed I feel, it's magic up there and Sam and I had a wonderful time." "Yes, it is a beautiful spot, I am sorry we didn't find your man son, there were no leads or trails to follow my men tried their hardest." "I am grateful they even tried and please send me the bill I need to pay for all this and the cabin. Here are the keys I washed and scrubbed everything and set the fire for the next tenant, so it's good to go." "We don't rent it out son it's just there because the family doesn't know what to do with it, they all have their own holiday houses, this one was Adele's son's, he bought it before he was dispatched. It's set up out of respect for the lad and you can use it anytime you want." he passed the keys back to me, I didn't want to cry so I looked around the room to distract them. "Ask the family if I can buy it, I don't want it for nothing I will buy it at market price." "I can do that Adam, they aren't interested in it and the next generation won't even remember who Adele or Meryl was, but I bet you Sam and his kids will love it up there, keep the magic going so to speak." He winked. "Thank you and please ask them for me." "In the meantime treat it like it's your own." I said my goodbyes and then I drove to the other salon. After parking I took a deep breath and went in the front door, the smells were here but they weren't mine they were a little different. I was greeted by Trish and I said good morning to all the staff as I was seated at the wash troughs. "Adam do you want a color?" "No Trish, why do you ask you know I never use it." "Umm, you have a faint streak of grey hairs want me to cover them up?" I got up and looked in the mirror, I haven't been looking because I was too scared as to what I would see staring back, sure enough, a strand of grey had formed down one temple. "Leave them, Trish. I will think about it, maybe I deserve them." She slapped my shoulder and I shut up, they weren't there eight weeks ago. I got a good head scrub pampering, and even a shoulder massage, she took her time to relax me then she trimmed my hair the way I liked it. 'I am going to buy the cabin, Trish." "Is it for sale?" "No, but I asked the lawyers if they would ask the family if I could buy it." "They will probably give it to you." "I don't want free stuff, Trish. I told them I would pay for it, and pay I will. He let me keep the keys so if you want to get away just ask." "That would be awesome Adam, I loved it there." "I can't wait to get Kasey there he will love it too." I got down because I had pulled him into the conversation. She very loudly yelled. "Whoops." That cracked me up and I laughed until I cried, again. I kissed her goodbye and walked down to my worker's cafe and bought a big serving of lasagna, that will do the three of us beautifully, with leftovers for Sam's breakfast. No one in the car park today so I took it upstairs then I walked down to pick Sam up. I strolled down the alley and shivered a few times because I thought someone was watching me. It gave me goosebumps so I quickened the pace, we will walk home the other way it's less crowded. (A man sitting on the cobblestone walkway with his cap in front of him wearing an old army coat had seen Adam approach, but he didn't know him, he just knew the feeling of closeness emanating from Adam's perfect face. He had seen this man before but he couldn't remember when. That night when he crawled into the sleeping bag he put the heater on and ate a familiar meal then drank the even more familiar coffee, but he still didn't know why. Whoever is doing all this for him is a saint in his books, he was scared he would get moved on but for now, he has a home at least. There were a lot of familiar things around him like that car, he thought he used to own one just like it a long time ago and the people that come and go he had seen from the street, they belonged here in this old green building where he felt he belonged also. But he once again couldn't remember. His headaches had gotten worse as he tried to think harder but he would always come up with nothing.) Adam had returned to feed his baby and tomorrow he will make an appearance at the salon, and hopefully his smells will still be there. Over dinner they made a scrapbook of leaves, Sam had written cabin on the front and he asked many questions about pressing them. When they were all placed he then closed it up and went to get some heavy books. Adam made sure it was well and truly squashed and told Sam to wait a couple of weeks and they will be ready to glue into a big photo frame. He thought it would look good in the cabin but I explained to him it wasn't ours and I followed up by telling him we could go there anytime we wanted. So he decided we will hang it in his room so he can look at it. I didn't ask if he wanted to go camping he was under the sleeping bag straight after his bath. I gave him ten minutes then I crawled in with him, this is just the best. My tramp was gone in the morning so I cleaned up a little and took the containers upstairs, I know he appreciated my efforts because he had chalked a smiley face on the brickwork, I will show Sam when he gets home. Tonight he eats well because I am having, guess? yes, that's right, casserole again. This went on for three weeks and the weather was getting worse and worse with the passing days. My time in the salon was anywhere from one to four hours, I worked out the back doing the walk-ins but even that had its downside. Many of Kasey's mates came in and wanted to talk about him, I listened and then cracked up when they left, I was getting good with my emotions. It was a nasty moment when one good-looking soldier asked me for a full body massage, I hit the roof. Tim had to remove him then he removed me, and it was on for young and old, once again I had lost it. Three months. He has been gone for three months. I said to Adele as I talked to her quietly on the balcony, I felt her there more than anywhere, only on the balcony. My tears flowed once again and I begged her to look after him for us and to tell him I will see him soon. I wasn't going to top myself I was only talking about when I died naturally. There won't be anyone else in my life, Kasey had spoiled it for me. He walked into my life one day and only left when he and dad concocted a plan to stop smuggling. This is what happens when you have a big heart and a set mind, this is military. I thanked Adele for listening and went to feed my men, the first wasn't home yet, but I prayed he was warm and safe. The second was on the phone to you know who planning a big holiday at the cabin. Donations to Nifty are much appreciated.