It is spring when they move into their new apartment. They are happy. On the door is a shining brass nameplate with their family names..."Dufresne - Maroux". Alain fills their home with flowers. Gilbert brings small pastries and champagne. They are celebrating when the doorbell rings.
"Who can it be? Your parents?" Gilbert asks.
"I don't think so... I'll go and see. Or rather, let's go together."
A woman in her forties is at the door. "Forgive me, I saw you moved here... My name is Charlotte Formentin. I am your neighbor in this same landing. If you need anything..."
"Thank you... I am Alain Dufresne and he is Gilbert Maroux... We were celebrating, if you would like to join us..."
"You are nice, thank you..." the woman said going in. She looked around. "How nice your place is. I hope you will feel well here, you and your companion."
The woman is likeable. She makes them understand, without saying it, that she guessed the real relationship between the two youths, and she treats them with a clear liking. They chat for a long while. She explains who the other tenants are - an old retired teacher couple and a doctor with his wife and two children on the second floor - a violin teacher with his lover, and three sisters who manage a clothes shop not far from the apartment, on the fourth floor. Charlotte (who has lived there for fifteen years), Alain and Gilbert are on the third floor. A quiet house...
When Charlotte leaves them, Alain starts to tidy the table, but Gilbert takes the glasses out from his hands. "Leave all as it is, we will do it later. Now, what do you think about using our new double bed for the first time? Okay?" he says with a sly air, caressing him on his side.
"Oh, Gilbert! Do you think I could refuse such a proposal?" Alain sweetly answers.
"Am I that irresistible?"
"Don't you know that you are? I still continue to be amazed at the effect you have on me just looking at me, or touching me in that way..."
"What effect?" Gilbert asks, pulling Alain to himself by his belt and caressing him more intimately.
"I understand nothing more, but that I'm dying from the desire to make love with you."
"A very good effect, then. Come to the bedroom, make me understand exactly what you feel."
They almost run, entering the bedroom filled with desire, and finally expressing it with all their bodies for a long time.
"Gil, I am the happiest man in the world."
"No, you are wrong, that one is me."
"No, I!"
"No, I..." Gilbert says, shutting his mouth with a deep and long kiss.
"Do you want to always have the last word?" Alain asks sweetly, caressing Gilbert's beautiful naked body.
"Oh, Alain... in this way you arouse me again..."
"Do I have to stop?"
"I didn't say that... I will never get tired of making love with you!"
"Do you swear?"
"I swear... and then, don't you see it?"
"Yes, I see it. And you are so beautiful."
"Never as much as you..."
They become friends with Charlotte, especially Gilbert. One day, while Alain is at work, he tells the woman, who clearly knows that he and Alain are lovers, about his past... his time as a hustler, the fact that he was a thief, and also about the prison and the problems he had in there. Charlotte listens serenely and her attitude towards Gilbert doesn't change at all.
"Do you see, Charlotte, I know I made Alain suffer a lot... and I think it is time I stop going... in other people apartments. The problem is that I just don't know what job I can do..."
"You love him, don't you?"
"And how!"
"So then, for him... You are very good with food preparation. Why don't you look for a job as a cook?"
"Bah, I never cooked for many people. I don't think I would be able to, unhappily."
"A small restaurant, as a cook assistant, just to start. A friend of mine owns a restaurant behind here. I could ask him if he can hire you."
"I have a record..."
"But you seem to me a clean boy and if I grant for you..."
"Would you?"
"Yes, because I feel I can trust you, and that you would not make me repent having done that."
So, Gilbert gets his first job. The restaurant owner, a man in his fifties named Jean-Claude, is likeable. He studied at the Fine Arts Academy with Charlotte, but then soon abandoned the arts career to open his little restaurant. He is divorced and has three adult children who now work and live on their own.
He at once has a liking for Gilbert. "You are the same age of my younger son. You are a good boy, in spite of your past. If you carried out a... peculiar life, that is not even completely your fault and if you want now to start a good life, I'm just glad to give you a hand," the man says to Gilbert. After the test month has passed, he hires him steadily.
Alain understands, even if Gilbert didn't tell him clearly so, that his lover is definitely saying goodbye to his past life, and feels deeply happy. To him, that is the more evident proof of the love that Gilbert has towards him. They celebrate the fourth anniversary of their first encounter, inviting Charlotte and Jean-Claude. It is beautiful being able to share their joy with their friends.
Charlotte and Jean-Claude introduce them to other of their friends - people who, even if they're not gay, accept them quietly like any usual couple... or rather as a "really beautiful couple" as Charlotte defines them.
Alain is more and more happy with his job, and also with the publisher who raises his pay without being asked to. Also Gilbert fits nicely in Jean-Claude's restaurant. The other cook, a handsome thirty year old man named Jerome (or Jerry) is single. Gilbert gets the feeling that Jerry is courting him therefore, even if the man is likeable and agreeable, he tries not to give him confidence.
But the man insists and one day tells him clearly, "I like you a lot, Gilbert. I would really like if we became friends..."
"We are friends, aren't we?" Gilbert answered, slightly tense.
"Special friends, intimate, I mean... come on, you know what I mean..." the other says, attempting a caress.
Gilbert escapes it and says, without hardness. "Yes, sure I understand, but I already have such a friend. Therefore, it is not possible."
"Then I understand correctly that you too are... But are you a faithful guy?"
"Sure, because he and I are in love. No offense, Jerry."
"Alright. But if one doesn't try, he cannot know, can he?"
"Right, but now you know, therefore..."
"Understood. But that's a shame, I like you a lot..." the cook answers, but he never again tries it.
Alain has just celebrated his twenty-fifth birthday. His parents wanted him at home for the occasion, and invited also Gilbert. Alain has the feeling that his parents understand what there is between him and Gilbert, but they prefer to pretend not to know. And as they are really kind towards Gilbert, this fits well with Alain.
One day, Gilbert is looking at a shop window when he feels a hand leaning on his shoulder.
He turns. "Oh, the Nicois..." he says taken aback, "I didn't know you were out."
"Yes, and I looked for you but at your old address they were not able to tell me where you moved. You now live nearby here, don't you?"
"Yes..." Gilbert answers hesitantly.
"Why don't you take me to your place?"
"I can't. I don't live alone."
"Oh, did you get a boyfriend? Who's he?"
"You don't know him." Gilbert sharply answers. He doesn't like the way the Nicois is looking at him.
"But you are my boy. Did you forget that?"
"No, I already was his boy before meeting you. You just took me in there. That was different."
"No, no, not at all. You belong to me. Come with me. Now."
"No... there is no reason..."
"Gilbert, you know me. You know that I would have found you anyway - I was planning to go to the Central Registry Office, and I can still go and find out where you live, and with whom you live. Therefore, you now come with me. Or else..."
"Or else...?" Gilbert asks in a challenging tone.
The man has a cold smile, "Or else your little friend will not live for long. I swear."
Gilbert looks at him speechless.
The man continues. "Be careful, I'm not joking - either you come back with me or... snip!" he says, making the gesture of cutting his throat.
Gilbert understands that the man is not jesting. "What's the matter with him? Why don't you kill me, then?"
"Because I want you, it's simple. And if he is an obstacle, I'll just get rid of him." the man icily says.
Gilbert is shocked. He discusses with the man but sees that there is nothing he can do. "If you kill him, you will go back to jail..."
"But you won't have him any more. That's enough for me."
"And if I killed you?"
"It will be you who goes to jail. Either way you'll no longer be with him. "
No, there is nothing he can do.
"But why do you want me? Can't you find another boy?" Gilbert asks.
"No, I want you. I've had other boys, in these years, but I just thought of you. Come, I'll take you to my home."
"Let me at least have the time to tell him goodbye, to take my belongings..."
"Alright. This is my address. I'll wait for you until six 'o clock. And don't try to play the smart-ass, as anyway I would find you... and him."
"Let's meet at seven... I swear I'll come..."
"No, six. Not even thirty seconds later, understand?"
When Alain comes back home, he is astounded to not find Gilbert. Supper is not ready, and all is silent. On the table of the studio he sees an envelope on display - on it is written "To Alain".
He opens it and reads the short message it contains. He turns pale. He reads it again. He goes to check their bedroom - the suitcase, some of Gilbert's clothes and some underwear is missing. He can't believe it. He doesn't know what to do. He goes to see Charlotte.
"My God, what a face, Alain! Are you Ok?"
"No... Read this..." he says, handing her Gilbert's message.
She reads it and exclaims, "No! I don't believe it!"
"I don't either, but... his suitcase and some of his clothes are missing. And he says not to look for him..."
"I really can't understand... What does he mean, 'I don't deserve you, look for another worth your love'? You are in love like two newly married people on their honeymoon! 'I don't feel like staying with you anymore, ' he writes! No, I don't believe that. What's up? Could he possibly have started again to... steal?"
"No, he never goes out at night without me, and he has his job during the day... Anyway, he never went to steal in daytime. And he stopped for real..."
"Didn't he go to work today?"
"No, it is his free day."
"Why not to go talk to Jean-Claude?"
"Yes, that could be a good idea."
Jean-Claude is astounded. He too excludes that Gilbert could have started again his old life, and he too can't understand what could have happened. He tries to ask to Jerry. The man then tells them about what he tried with Gilbert, and how the boy answered him with a round no, saying he was in love with Alain... No, things don't fit.
Days pass. Their common friends have no news about Gilbert. He didn't leave any trace. He didn't even withdraw a single cent from their common bank account in all those days. Anyway Gilbert took away all his documents, but left at home both the check carnet and his credit card.
Alain is restless. He spends almost all his free time with Charlotte, who tries to keep his morale high, but he is dejected.
"It's not possible. All was going so very well between us... No, it's not possible..." he repeated to his friend.
"And yet, Alain, you have to surrender. Besides the letter, there's not a telephone call, not a hint... Four weeks are passed, now..."
"But why?" Alain asks, disconsolate.
Charlotte and the other friends try to divert his mind, and try to make him accept the fact that Gilbert wanted to leave him, whatever the reason was. Months elapse. The only thing that helps Alain to go on is his job. The hope that Gilbert will show up becomes thinner day after day.
One year passes since Gilbert disappeared. Alain, little by little, stops talking about him... all the friends, in a silent agreement, don't name him or make words about the past. Alain, even if he can't make the radiant smile he once had, starts again to smile... and to live. Charlotte is to him a great psychological help.
Meanwhile, Gilbert lives with the Nicois in a small apartment on the boundary of the village of Tassin la Demi Lune, just outside Lyon. Gilbert doesn't go out of the home except to do shopping. He passes all his time in silence, taciturn, carrying out the home chores for the Nicois, slipping in his bed with him and, when he feels the man he is aroused (which was quite often), satisfies him in silence. The only thing that Gilbert refuses to do is participate in the robberies that the Nicois does from time to time. But the man doesn't care - he doesn't need him and knows that he can't count on a reluctant companion anyway.
The Nicois is also a taciturn type, and is not bothered by the silence of his young "guest". On the contrary, it's better for him when Gilbert complies to all his orders perfectly, without uttering a word. It is enough for him to have the youth ready to satisfy his desires, above all the sexual ones. As the man is not a romantic type, the fact that the youth is available to satisfy him in a mechanical way doesn't bother him at all. To the man the important thing is to have at hand a vigorous male who sates him each time he feels horny... at once, without fuss, and in the way he likes.
It is as if Gilbert is withering away, in a sense. He feels inside himself a dull pain, and he thinks of Alain all the time.
Alain is walking in the Roseraie, alone. His thoughts unavoidably go back to the first time that Gilbert and he made love... He goes back to that spot... He stops there for a moment, immersed in his sad remembrances. Then he goes back to the lane.
A boy stops him. " Sir, excuse me... can you give me a few coins? I'm hungry, and haven't eaten in two days."
Alain looks at him - he is a handsome boy. He has wide sad eyes.
"Do you really need the money for drugs instead?" he asks him, studying him.
"No, really sir... I'm hungry..."
"If that's true, I'll offer you a meal."
"Oh, yes, thank you."
"Come with me, then." Alain starts to walk and the boy follows him.
For a moment Alain thinks about taking him to Jean-Claude's, but then he remembers that he has plenty of food ready at home, so he takes him there. He has him seated in the kitchen, prepares for two, and serves the food. The boy eats voraciously.
"What's your name?"
"Denis, sir."
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen, almost eighteen."
"Did you run away from home?"
"Yes..."
"Why?" Alain asks.
The boy blushes. "I'd rather not to tell you... Sorry." he almost stammers.
"As you like... But where do you sleep?"
"Where I can, sir," the boy answers, biting with pleasure a slice of roast-beef.
Alain looks at him and feels tenderness. After the meal, Alain asks him, "Do you still feel hungry?"
"No, thank you. It was very good and abundant."
"Then I'll make coffee. Would you like some?"
"Thank you, you are very kind." the boy says with a sweet smile.
Alain puts the coffeepot on the cooker, tidies the table and starts to wash the dishes. When the coffee is ready, he pours it into two cups and puts them on the table with the pot. The boy leaned his arms on the table, his head on them, and is sleeping...
"Hey, the coffee..." Alain whispers, feeling moved, but the boy doesn't answer. His breathing is deep and regular. Alain sits near him, caresses his hair, bends over him and calls, "Hey, Denis, the coffee..." Nothing. He gently shakes him. "Denis, the coffee is ready... it's becoming cold..." The boy utters a short moan but doesn't move. Alain puts his arm on the boy's shoulders, shaking them lightly. "Denis? Hey, Denis!" he calls to him in a low voice.
Finally the boy raises his head a little, turns it towards him, smiling almost as if to excuse himself and says, "Oh, thank you... I'm sorry... I fell asleep..."
Alain feels in that smile an incredible sweetness and smiles in answer, "Drink it, now."
"Thank you."
Alain asks him, "You are deadly tired... do you want to sleep here, at least for tonight?"
"I don't want to bother you..."
"I have just a bed, but wide enough, there is room for two, if you want..."
"Really, I don't want to bother you... You are really kind... but it's been two weeks since I could wash in a decent way..."
"Well, then, if you want you can first take a shower..."
"Really? My God, that would be great!" the boy says, his eyes wide round, and Alain thinks he seems a fawn.
He stands up, fetches a bath gown and all that is needed to wash up, and guides the boy to the bathroom. "It's here. Take your time washing up and, if you feel like it, you can go to bed once you've finished. I just have some work to carry on. When you go to bed, you can wear these pajamas if you want... they will be somewhat wide for you, but..."
"Thank you very much."
"I will be there, in that room. The bedroom is behind that door, you see? Take your time, relax..."
"Really, thanks a lot."
Alain goes to the studio and starts to read a manuscript he found particularly interesting and wanted to evaluate before the following day. He hears the water pelting. He immerses himself in his reading. From time to time he takes some notes for his final report. Yes, he has the impression that this young writer has talent - it is really a good book, he thinks pleased.
The water stops flowing. In a while the boy comes out and goes to his side.
He has in his hands the bundle of his clothes. "These... will it be possibly better if I leave them in the bathroom? They don't have a good smell..." he says, feeling visibly ashamed.
"No, give them to me. I'll start the washing machine now, and tomorrow morning we will put them in the dryer so you will have clean clothes."
"I really don't know how to thank you..."
"It's alright. I'm happy to be able to give you a hand."
"By the way... believe me, I never took drugs..." the boy seriously says. He pulls his wallet out from his trousers' pocket. "Here are my documents. You can take them..."
"It doesn't matter..."
"You don't know me, and yet are so kind with me. Keep them, until tomorrow..."
"Alright, I'll put them here on the desk. Now go to bed."
"If it doesn't bother you, sir..."
"No, not at all.... And stop calling me sir, after all I am only twenty-five. My name is Alain... Good night, Denis."
"Thank you, Alain. Good night."
Alain starts the washing machine and slips in it the boy's clothes after checking the pockets to make sure there is nothing in them. What he pulls out is an empty key holder, an Asterix little plastic puppet, and a used ticket for the Bordeaux-Lyon train - so then the boy comes from Bordeaux... He puts all those humble objects near the wallet. He starts again to read the manuscript.
Around midnight he finishes. He peeps through the door of the bedroom - the table lamp on the side of the boy is lit. He hears the regular breath of the sleeping boy. He goes to the kitchen to drink, then goes again towards his bedroom. When he passes near his desk and is about to shut off the light, he notices the wallet. Curious, he opens it -- not even a single franc-note. The ID paper says his name is Denis Lachasse, he is almost eighteen, and he comes from Bordeaux. Profession: student. Who knows why he ran away from home?
He goes into his bedroom. Before switching off the night-lamp on Denis' side, he looks at him. He has an innocent expression, sweet, really beautiful... He goes on his side, undresses without any noise, puts on his pajamas and slips into the bed. He shuts off the light. He again asks himself why the boy ran away. He falls asleep.
When he wakes up in the morning, Denis is still sleeping. He goes to fix their breakfast and puts Denis' damp clothes in the dryer. Then he dresses and goes to wake up the boy.
"Had a good sleep?" he asks him with a smile.
"A wonderful one... thank you."
"Now come to the kitchen. We'll eat breakfast then you can have back your clothes that are drying to wear them. I have to go to work..."
"Yes, sure. Thank you," the boy says with a delightful smile. He again eats with gusto, and Alain likes looking at him.