OF LOVE AND CHANCE
Chapter Nine: LOVE AND MACARONI
a story by:
Solace Lenity
©2003-2004
This is a
story about, well,
love and chance. It is for the most part, a work of pure fiction,
though some of the situations discussed are drawn from life experiences
(particularly the romantic ones). Though not in the beginning,
this story will eventually contain sexual acts between consenting
adults. Gay characters have gay sex, so if this bothers you, or
if it is illegal to read such materials due to your age or where you
live, then please do not read further. All copy rights are held
by the author, so please do not duplicate, print, alter, or resubmit (or
anything else I may have missed ) this
story without first obtaining written
permission from the author.
Further notes: This
story will address several social issues in a
perspective in which you may or may not agree. It is also a story
centered around life and love between friends, family, and partners,
along with romance, and it is not intended to be a jerk-off
story. There are spiritual and paranormal themes which affect the
lives of the characters. Finally, the story is told in the
various points of view of the characters involved. (To make this
process easier, each character's story is distinguished by a specific
color and font style dedicated to that character.)
This is my first attempt at
writing fiction of any kind. If you
have any comments, ideas, suggestions, etc., I would love to hear
them. I have greatly enjoyed the comments I have received thus far and
wish to thank you all for taking the time to send them.
Please contact me via solacelenity@yahoo.com
Sorrow
We were shopping at the mall, when Angel grabbed me from the
side. "I ain't sure what nobody
else is gonna think 'bout it, but I's likin' this 'n." As
I looked into the wall length mirror, I was mesmerized by Chance's
beauty. His smile and his sparkling hazel eyes, which were more
blue at that moment, melted my heart. He was gently stroking the
fabric of the stretchy shirt I was then trying on. The jeans were
rather snug as well.
I grinned at him, gazing into his eyes through the mirror. "I
don't know, Angel. They seem a bit revealing to me. Maybe,
they're just a bit too tight."
His infectious laugh rang clearly through the dressing room. "Yeah, but that's what I's likin' 'bout it." He
smiled even bigger, and I wondered how that was possible. Yet, he
did. He cast his gaze along my body, then commented, "You's put together REAL good, if you's
askin' me." His hand glided smoothly across my chest and
down my side to my hip. "I
think that there looks AWFUL NICE on ya."
To say I was surprised was an understatement, as blood pulsed
through my cheeks and my whole face reddened. "Lord, Humper. I think Ethan was
right!" I shot. "And
to think, you had the nerve to tell me I was
acting like them!"
He just giggled. "Well, if
you's don't want me tellin' you I think you's handsome 'n all..."
He started.
I grabbed him quickly, smirking. "Should
I get these in every color they have, Angel?"
"I knowed you was likin' it, just too
shy like to admit it is all." He laughed, then kissed me
tenderly. "Say, let's see what
'em other fella's think of this 'n." The mischief that was
on his face had me grinning.
He took my hand and led me out into the main area of the store. "What y'all think 'bout this 'n?"
Angel asked proudly.
"Holy!" TJ started, but
remembered his manners in front of Dad. Jake lightly slapped him
on the back of the head and grabbed him by the waist firmly, smirking
and shaking his head.
Carter and Dakota just stared, while Daddy and Pop were smiling at
Angel and me. Then, Daddy told Dad, "Love, I could see you in an outfit like
that, you know." with a big grin across his face.
Ethan looked shocked and smacked Daddy on the arm. "There is no wonder from where Chance gets
it!" Then, he turned to Shaft, "Honey,
I told you something like this was going to happen." He
glared at Chance sternly. "That's
it Humper. You can forget helping him pick out anything else."
Chance just gave Ethan his 'yeah,
whatever' smirk. Ethan's response, though, quickly had
Angel reconsidering the outfit. "Hey,
if you want all the guys to see what they are missing by seeing ALL your boyfriend has to offer,
then be my guest."
I was completely embarrassed, and everyone laughed at my expense.
Angel took my hand gently, pulling me to the dressing room. "I guess we oughta get 'em ol' baggy 'n's
then. But, we's gettin' this 'n for you to wear at home 'n
all." He grinned at me with a wink.
"Honestly, son," Dad
smiled, "you look nice. A
little too nice, perhaps, as Ethan is saying, but nice
nonetheless. If you like it, then buy it. They are your
clothes, after all."
"To
think, I thought you were the sensible one!" Ethan exclaimed as he whacked Dad on
the arm. "Are you all crazy? Do
you realize what is going to happen when he steps out of the house in
that? We will never get a moment's sleep worrying about
him."
I hugged Ethan from behind, giggling. "OK, Mommy. I promise I will only
wear this..." but, he turned in my arms, putting his hand
up to my mouth. The guys were all snickering at everything going
on, including Blade. I have to tell
you that Chance had many small conversations with Blade throughout the
day, as Blade was curious about what it was like for Chance to be
homeless. He expressed a few times to me how special Angel really
was.
"If you are getting ready to say you
will only wear this in your room, I don't think that will make me feel
any better. You share a room with Humper, after all."
Ethan replied wryly. Then, he smiled at me and pat my
cheek. "It's just that you are
far too handsome for your own good. I don't know that I like the
idea of someone making eyes at one of our young men."
I kissed him on the forehead. "I
love you, too."
He grinned. "Hell, just buy
it. You do look quite fine, Thumper." Ethan turned
his attention to Chance. "I
suppose you did pick out a nice outfit, Humper, even if you were
thinking more with your hormones."
Chance bellowed with laughter. "I
reckon I's learnin' lots from you."
Angel darted to safety quickly, as Ethan was in hot pursuit. Once
Ethan exacted his revenge, Chance and I returned to the dressing
room. After trying on several more outfits, we made our final
selections. Among other outfits, I ended up with three stretchy
shirts with coordinating pairs of those jeans. Anything that
made Angel that excited was more than fine by me. We then
purchased a few more outfits, a jacket, a coat, shoes, underwear,
T-shirts, socks, and cologne. Angel, of
course, picked out the
cologne.
While Angel and I were shopping for me, the other guys tried on
outfits, too. Jake, Juan, and Blade bought a few things, while
the rest just enjoyed goofing around in various clothing with Ethan and
Shaft. By Shaft's request, Chance did some of his impersonations,
which had everyone in stitches.
Pop smiled at me. "Eric, that
Chance is one in a billion." He hugged me tightly. "I'm really glad the two of you found each
other. He loves you wholeheartedly and brings out the best in
you."
"He brings out the best in everyone,
Pop." I grinned, thinking of the way he put others at such
ease. "He is so loving and so
full of hope. I can't explain it, really, but his very presence
makes me believe all things are possible." Then, I
laughed. "In case you've not
noticed, I love him wholeheartedly, too."
Pop chuckled. "I remember those
days all to well, Eric. Just never let a day go by that you don't
remind him just how much he means to you." Then, he dug in
his pocket and handed me some hefty cash. "This is for the two of you. I think
you are both still too young to go out by yourselves. So, go
double dating... with TJ and Jake, Kal and Kanawha, Ethan and Shaft, or
whomever else you think would make for a wonderful evening."
I was looking at the wad he gave me questioningly, and Pop
laughed. "I want you to enjoy
yourselves as often as possible. That should last you a little
while, and it will make things easier on Kal and Kanawha."
He looked at Dad and Daddy, turning somewhat serious. "Kanawha is a great man, and I have become
rather fond of him. Kal reminds me
so much of David... well, what I imagine David would be like if he were
still with us."
He became a bit teary eyed, and so did I. Though it had never
actually occurred to me before then, Dad really was a lot like David,
in both looks and actions. "David
loved you so much, Eric. You
were his whole world. From the day you came home from the
hospital, he laid claim to you. Your mother and I had to
practically pry you away from him. You, in turn, would cry your eyes
out until David was holding you again. I still have no idea why
he did what he did, son, but I do know that David loved you more than
anything. Of that, there is no doubt."
He wiped a few stray tears from my eyes and smiled. "Chance loves you like that, too.
Only his love is ten times more, at least."
I hugged him tightly. "Thanks,
Pop. I have been remembering David quite a lot lately."
We talked a good bit about our memories of my hero, as everyone else
played around with the vast supply of clothes and hats.
I turned my attention to Chance and was struck with a volley of violent
laughter. He was wearing a bright purple suit and hat, strutting
around performing his rendition of 'Pimp Daddy C', as he was calling
himself. Ethan, Shaft, TJ, Dakota, and Carter were pretending
strong desire, comically swooning at his feet. Daddy was
literally all that was holding Dad up, he was laughing so hard.
"There is something off about your
boy, there, Sorrow." Blade chuckled. "If not for his being so entertaining, I'm
sure we would all be hitting the pavement with our asses by now."
As Blade had pointed out, the store clerks were all watching Angel's
performance, laughing hysterically. There was also an older guy
who looked around Pop's age smirking. Casually, he walked over to
our group. "Excuse me,
gentlemen,
but I was wondering if I could get all of your names, addresses, and
phone numbers."
Chance's eyes grew huge, as the laughter quickly died down. "Look, we's all just havin' us a little bit
of fun. We wasn't gonna hurt or steal nothin, honest."
He pointed to some of the bags beside Daddy. "See, we's just gettin' Sorrow some of his
school clothes 'n all."
The man laughed hysterically. "No,
no, no! You have me all wrong, little fellow. I am Mario,
the manager, and our store participates in the fall fashion show here
at the mall. I was wanting all of your information because I
believe you guys would make excellent models for the show."
He then looked at Daddy, Dad, and Pop. "That would include you three gentlemen, as
well. The show is on Friday evening, two weeks from now."
"You's wantin' us to walk 'round
wearin' these clothes 'n stuff?" Angel asked, somewhere
between surprised and relieved.
"Yes, young man, that is exactly what
I was thinking." He smiled broadly. "To be honest, I was watching all the
little performances you guys have been doing, and they were quite
funny. I think they would make some great commercials for the
store, especially 'Pimp Daddy C'. I think it would give an
impression of shopping experiences at our store being fun and
exciting, yet still show that we offer something for everyone. Of
course, that would be up to the district manager, but I know they are
looking for local talent and fresh ideas." He paused a moment to
scan our faces. "At any rate,
you would each wear five outfits in the fashion show. Those five
outfits would be yours to keep for doing the show."
Everyone was somewhere between confused and excited as we talked it
over. Blade then asked. "Well,
Mario, I was wondering if the clothes we take with us have to be in our
sizes, or can they be in other sizes."
He thought about that a moment, as Angel and I wondered what was
up. Then, a smile passed Angel's face, so I knew it must be
something good. Mario finally answered. "I suppose if you or any of you other guys
wanted different sizes, that would be fine. You are the first to
ever ask me that question, I must tell you."
Blade had a grin on his face. "Then
count us all in. We will let you know what sizes we would like
this coming Saturday, if that would be all right."
Mario agreed and wrote down all of our information. We finished
our shopping and then headed out to put everything into the van.
Once outside, Blade's grin had the best of us.
"OK, Blade, spill it."
Dwayne was the first to state his curiosity. "Why are we all the sudden doing this Fall
Fashion Show?"
Blade stumbled with his words a moment. "I guess it is from being around you fags
too much, but I was thinking." Angel grabbed my hand,
squeezing it gently as Blade continued. "We all have old clothes that are in fairly
good shape, except for you, Chance. Anyway, we all now have new
clothes for school, too." He paused, finding it hard to
express his idea. "What I was
thinking is this: Every year, there are a few kids who do not
have new clothes, and they stand so far out of place with the rest of
us. There were also those guys today, the ones from breakfast
that were our age. I imagine it has been quite some time since
they have had anything new. So, I was thinking that if we all did
the show, then we could get a bunch of new clothes... like 70 outfits,
if I counted right... to give to people who could truly use them. Maybe
it is silly, but that is what I was thinking."
Dakota motioned for Blade to bend down, so he did. He was a bit
awkward when Dakota hugged him. "Normally,
I do not like being called 'FAG', but I feel complimented by what you
just said. I think your idea is brilliant, and I would be happy
if I could call you friend."
He reached out his hand to Blade, who smiled when he took it
into his own in a firm shake.
Everyone grinned at each other and simultaneously attacked Blade with
hugs. Though he protested, calling it FAG-FEST, we all knew he
liked the idea of having real friends. Perhaps the hugs were
debatable, but I believe he still enjoyed them.
At any rate, we all thought it was a wonderful idea and readily agreed
to Blade's new project. I knew a bunch of us had ideas on making
his project even better, but none of us voiced them. This was
Blade's first attempt to help others, and out of respect and
admiration, no one wanted to do anything to take any of the glory away
from him. We all offered our assistance should he need it, but we
wordlessly decided he would be the leader in this adventure. It was
wonderful to see him smile so much, and he had every reason to do
so. Angel and I were very proud of him, knowing he had taken a
huge leap in becoming the person God was delicately calling forth.
"Angel, I know you do not believe me,
but I still feel certain it was you who inspired him to be better."
I whispered softly.
He just grinned and kissed me. "Sometimes,
I's wonderin' if you's ever listenin' to me. The rest of the
time, I just reckon you's thinkin' I's lots more than I am, blind by
love I guess. But, I knows I's likin' you believin' in me so
much."
"I only wish you could see yourself
through my eyes, Angel. Then, you would not have any doubts about
yourself or how wonderful you truly are." Then, I
giggled. "I guess you are the
one needing glasses, now."
"I reckon we's both seein' ourselves
different than the other 'n is. I knows I's likin' what I's
seein' in you. You's growin' now, gettin' better 'n stronger ever
day. Long
as you's likin' what you's seein' in me, then I guess I's just fine
with it." he
smiled.
I kissed him softly. "Angel, I
love everything about you. The way you laugh, the way you say
things, the way you make people feel hopeful, the way I wake up to your
beautiful, smiling face... I love you completely."
His eyes began to glaze over with tears, causing them to sparkle even
more like the heavens from which I knew he was sent. "You's made special, just for me. I's
so, so thankful for you, Sorrow. I love you more 'n I knows how
to say. I hope you's know it anyway."
"Believe me Angel, I know."
I caressed his face, and our lips slowly met for another soft kiss.
"If you two could keep your lips off
of one another long enough, we might be able to get you into the van so
we can go eat. We are kind of hungry, just in case you didn't
notice." Shaft laughed. "You boys are getting more and more like
your dads every day."
With that remark, we found our way quickly to our seats and headed
out. We were following Pop, and I was thrilled to see his choice
of restaurants. We pulled into Home Front's, a musical dinner
theater with themes from World War II. I had always
held a fascination
with WW2, and I was certain that Angel would love the music.
Pop treated everyone, saying it was his special reward to Chance for
doing so well on his test. Angel was beaming as he hugged Pop
snugly. "I don't reckon I's
been to a place all fancy like this 'n before." He gazed
around, taking in all the sights, and his eyes were filled with
wonder. "This here place is
real nice. Look, they's all dressed kind of funny like. 'Em
ladies even gots their hair done up in one of 'em old kind of styles."
he commented with joy.
"Just wait until you hear them sing."
Pop smiled.
Everyone seemed enthusiastic as we were seated. The wonderful
melody of the live band played in the background as everyone ordered
their dinner. Angel was so adorable, the way his foot was tapping
and swaying with the music. The sounds of the band were
captivating him, as if beckoning him to new levels of
appreciation. Smiling at his reaction, I knew this
would be one place we would have to revisit.
As dinner was served, the show began. If Angel had been excited
before, it was nothing compared to his impression of the actual
performances. Though I found the show to be excellent, I was far
more interested in watching Chance. His face was so lit with
fascination, finding nothing but utter joy and awe in everything.
At one point, the diners were allowed to utilize the dance floor.
I was amazed at our dads' skillful dancing. They were fantastic,
really
showing up the others. Ethan and Shaft were rather sharp dancers,
too. The four of them did illicit a few stares and off-colored
remarks, but they did not let them disturb the evening.
Dad took me out on the floor, while Daddy danced with Chance. Patiently, they
instructed
us on a few of the dances, which both Angel and I found to be
awesome. Pop taught Juan, while TJ and Jake danced beside him,
carefully paying attention to the pattern of the steps. They
seemed to catch on quickly, and Pop praised them many times.
Carter, Dwayne, and Blade decided to sit the dancing out, claiming to
be natural disasters on their feet. I had seen Blade
dance before, and he was not lying, that was for sure. That left Dakota
without a partner, but Carter eventually caved in to the pressure and
fumbled through a couple of dances. If truth be
told, I believe Carter was beginning to realize that Dakota was one
cute
little fellow.
We changed partners a few times, and both Chance and I loved dancing
with our dads and Pop. It was just a great experience, and each
one taught us a few new steps. Shaft and Ethan worked with Carter
a good bit, and I could tell he really loved those guys. Honestly,
though, who wouldn't?
When the dancing time ended, everyone returned to their seats,
anticipating the second half of the show. The stories about the
soldiers reminded me of what it must be like for Mic and Thomas.
Though I had not met him yet, I felt pride in knowing such a person
existed. So many were giving up so much to protect our freedom...
and to me, they were all heroes. The show ended with a tribute to
our troops, and there was not a dry eye in the house. We all left
feeling very patriotic.
Everyone gave Pop his appreciation and thanks for the evening.
Chance and I gave him tight hugs, and he asked if we would like to
spend the night with him sometime soon. Since our Dads had a
special evening planned for Monday, we decided it would be a great time
to get together with Pop.
Pop talked this over with our dads, and they felt it was a wonderful
idea. Pop gave Dad a firm hug, calling him Sonny. Dad
carefully brushed a tear from Pop's cheek, becoming aware of the
significance the name held for both Pop and me. Sonny was his
nickname for David. He and Daddy also shared an embrace, as Pop
whispered something to Daddy. Smiling, Pop commented on what a
fine couple they were and wished them years of happiness.
Once Pop left, we all boarded the van. In a matter of time, we
had everyone dropped off to their homes. As Blade exited the van,
he thanked Angel for opening his eyes to the world around him.
Then, he quickly turned and walked away before Angel could
comment. Maybe it was my imagination, but I believe I noticed a
few tears in Blades eyes, something I never before saw.
Once home, we carried everything into the house. At Hela and
Mic's request, I gave everyone a fashion preview of my new
wardrobe. Everyone seemed to be a bit surprised by the
tighter clothing Chance had picked out for me. Roe assured me
that it was because I looked more mature in them. His exact
wording earned him a pounding from Hela, but that was the G-rated
version of his intent.
After playing with the pups, Angle and I called it a night. Dad
and Daddy tucked us in, saying prayers with us, as usual. We both
thanked them for a wonderful day and the dance lessons. They
promised to teach us more about dancing, but suggested we ask Nana and
Grams, since they were the ones who had taught our dads.
After a few nice kisses, Angel settled into my arms, nestling his head
on my chest. I gently scratched his back for a few minutes, and
he fell fast asleep. I fondly watched him in his slumber for the
next hour, until sleep finally claimed me from the waking world.
Shaft
I awoke Sunday morning
snuggled closely to Ethan. He was such an amazing man. I
wondered what I ever did to deserve such a lover as I watched him
peacefully sleep. His chest would gently rise and fall with just
the slightest snoring sound. I smiled to myself, thinking how
cute it was.
His blond hair was flowing across his face, so I carefully reached out
and brushed the stray strands away. With that done, I could now
behold his glorious face. He was so peaceful, so innocent and
pure. Temptation gained the better of me, and I ever so gently
kissed his lips.
Instinctively, I suppose, they responded to my presence. Their
silky soft texture was a welcomed feeling, causing electrically charged
tingles to dance up my spine. What started out as the slightest
of touches began to increase in pressure. Soon, we were locked
into a strong, passionate kiss as Ethan stirred to life.
His heavy eyelids, lined with thick blond lashes, slowly lifted
upwards. The golden tan, cat-like eyes of my lover glistened as
they focused and gazed into my own. Breaking our kiss, Ethan
sighed. "Mmm. A guy could
get used to waking up like this. What's the occasion?"
"You, honey." I
grinned. "You are all the
reason I need to view each day as spectacular."
With a ghost like touch, his fingers trailed across my chest and down
my side, delicately roaming about my hip. "You know, Shaft, flattery like that will
get you everywhere."
His very presence stirred me from deep within, and I was pulsing to
life quickly. "Honestly, honey,
this was not my original intention. However, since we both seem
up to the challenge..." I pulled him into another kiss, letting
my lips finish my thoughts.
He giggled playfully. "Never
let an opportunity pass you by. That is my motto."
With that being said, Ethan kissed me again.
His nomadic hands migrated about my body, arousing every nerve ending
to the highest point of sensual pleasure. I reciprocated, my
fingers trickling lightly down his back and spine. I firmly
grabbed and squeezed the cheeks of his butt, just as I knew he liked,
kneading them between my fingers. His quiet moans assured me of
his appreciation, as did his grinding himself against me. The
friction between our meeting bodies had us both shivering with
delight.
His kiss intensified, his tongue exploring my mouth with heightened
need. He continued smashing himself into me, pushing me from my
side to my back. He broke our kiss, staring lovingly into my
eyes. Then, he reached into the night stand drawer. After
preparing himself, his cold, slick hand encircled the length of me,
stealing my breath away with uncontrollable shudders. With a few
caressing strokes, he had me ready.
His eyes spoke the depths of his love, as they pierced through the veil
of my soul. With a small pressure, he impelled himself, granting
me entry into the warm, euphoric space so lovingly offered. I
gasped as he tightened around the length of me, sensations beyond
description passing through my very being. I sat up somewhat,
meeting his lips with my own for another passionate kiss.
Slowly, he began rocking his body, gently pushing me back to the
bed. I reached to touch him, but he stopped me. Lacing his
fingers in my own, he smiled, asserting his control over the
situation. With one last loving look, I closed my eyes,
surrendering completely to my Ethan.
Each rise and fall of my lover brought moans of pleasure from me.
Softly, he grunted, varying his pace and positioning. His body
began to tense and tighten around me, as Ethan moved with more
urgency. Erotic waves of euphoria swept through me, and I began
to feel the contractions inside me.
Opening my eyes, I could feel the desire in Ethan's look. A soft
sheen of perspiration had covered us both, and he glistened in the
early morning light, almost glowing in fact. Tears filled my eyes
as I pondered what a blessing he truly was. "Ethan, honey, I love you." I
moaned out.
"Mmm. I love you, too, baby."
he uttered through his pleasure.
His contracting muscles encased me more tightly, as I let out a strong
sigh. Releasing my hands, he pulled me upward, joining us in
another passionate kiss. As his tongue touched mine, I was pushed
beyond my limits. I grasped him firmly, crying out into his mouth
as I exploded into climax. Seconds later, Ethan clutched onto me
with a powerful grip, spasming into his own euphoric ending.
We collapsed back onto the bed, each depleted of our energy. As
our ragged breathing returned to a somewhat normal rate, Ethan looked
at me, grinning. "Now that is
the way to start off the morning!" he said cheerfully.
I smiled at him, caressing his delicate cheek. "Making love to you is fantastic, but the
simple act of loving you, now that is what really makes life worth
living."
His eyes began to tear up, but he could read the concern on my
face. "You are such a romantic
man, Shaft. Every moment I am with you, you make me feel like I
am the most important person on the planet. You record every
detail to your heart." A single tear trickled down his
cheek, and I caught it with my finger. Rubbing his cheek against my
hand, he sighed. "Sometimes, I
can be such an ass... like when we went skating. The truth is, I
love you, Carmine Romero, with everything I have to give. It just
doesn't feel like enough, but I hope you know how much you mean to me."
I was deeply moved by his pledge, but something in it struck me. "Ethan, you are the romantic one between
us, not me. You are so full of life and emotion, while I just
methodically observe everything. You act with such conviction and
passion. How could I ever compare to that? If I express any
life at all, it is only by your inspiration." I
admitted. "As for the skating,
well, it was stupid of me. I put you in a position where you felt
frustrated and out of control. That was my fault, honey, not
yours." I smiled, remembering the evening. "Talk about romantic. I had never
been so turned on as I was that evening. The way you express your
emotions and love in your caresses and kisses, you share your very soul
with me, Ethan. I could never offer you that. You just have
my word that I love you, but I have your very heart, in every single
action, to show me your love."
"You could never be more wrong, honey,
but I love you, anyway." he smiled. "Let's get in the shower. Then, you
and I will fix breakfast for everyone again."
I laughed, thinking of our experience. "It was fun, you know, cooking for the ones
we love. But, then, anything we do together seems to turn out
that way."
He pulled me from the bed, and we took a long, hot, passion-filled
shower. Afterwards, we began our
trip downstairs. The rustling footsteps down the hallway let us
know we were not alone.
"So, did you boys sleep well?"
I asked, bending down to pat their heads. Domino and Chips wagged
their tails in appreciation. "Come
on boys. I'll take you outside." After playing with
the little monsters out back, I fed them. Then, I joined Ethan in
the kitchen.
After scrubbing up, I helped him start the French Toast. We
chatted a bit while cooking, exchanging a few kisses between the
banter. Then, he surprised me.
"Do you think we will ever have
children? Well, I know we won't get pregnant, but you know what I
mean." He laughed.
I thought about it a moment. "Honestly,
honey, I never really thought about children before. I guess with
my heart condition and all, I never even thought I would find a
partner, much less have a family."
He looked at me sadly for a moment, then cheered up quickly, as if
pushing those thoughts out of his mind. "Well, one of these days, I would love to
have a few. Too bad Chance and Sorrow are already claimed."
"I don't think Kal and Kanawha would
give them up very easily, that's for sure." I
laughed. "But, I would love to
raise a family with you, Ethan."
He kissed me, smiling happily. We continued in idle chit-chat
while finishing up breakfast. Kanawha and Kal were the first to
join us in the kitchen. They put out the dishes and juices.
Sorrow and Chance quickly followed, hugging and kissing us all good
morning.
Chance grinned at Ethan and me for a moment, and I just knew he was
going to make a 'humping' remark. But, he surprised me. "We's awful lucky, Sorrow 'n me. We
gets to see two guy couples in love with one 'nother, showin' us what
it's 'posed to be like to be a couple 'n all. We also gets
to see two guy-girl couples too. Other 'n having kids to findin'
kids, I don't reckon there is really any difference in 'em."
Then, he laughed. "Well, I
reckon guy couples like kissin' more 'n guy-girl couples. Seems
like it 'round here at least." With that, he kissed
Sorrow, then turned back to us. "See
what I's meanin'!"
Ruffling up his hair, Ethan handed Chance a couple of platters to put
on the table. "I love those
guys." He muttered to me. "I don't know what we would do without
them."
"Neither do I, honey." I
grinned. Though only children in many ways, they were so grown up
in others. Being with them always made us smile. They made
everyone smile, for that matter.
The family was soon all down to breakfast. Allen had stopped by
to join us, and I was delighted to see my sister so happy. As
selfless as she was, I was thankful that God had brought someone so
kind and compassionate as Allen to be her companion in life.
We all talked as we consumed our meal, just as we usually did.
After cleaning up the dishes, Ethan and I were heading up to our room
to change for church.
"Not so fast, little brother."
Jena giggled. We both turned to see four smiling faces:
Jena, Jew, Cole, and Allen.
"You two are not going to church
today. We have other plans for you." Allen grinned,
and Ethan and I looked at him in wonder. "You have a different way of communing
today." he assured us.
"And you better not screw it up.
We all worked hard on this." Jew added, hugging Jena from
behind.
The grin on Cole's face grew as she began speaking. "One by one, you both asked me for
help. So, we decided to teach you both a lesson in romance."
She laughed, seeing the shock on our faces as we turned to each
other. "Yes, Ethan asked me to
help him find a way to give you the most romantic day. He didn't
think he was romantic enough for you, brother." Everyone
started chuckling. "Little did
he know that you asked me to do the same thing for him, and for the
same reasons. Well, today, we all hope you learn that it is not
where you go or what you do that makes romance. It is simply
spending quality time with the one you love."
Allen handed us an envelope with driving directions. "Follow these exactly, and do not open the
envelope until you get there." he smiled.
"And, you will need these, but no
peaking." Jew laughed, handing us a small suitcase.
"After you finish there, follow these
directions. Then, you can open this." Jena grinned,
handing us another envelope.
"Finally, you follow these directions,
and do the same." Cole laughed, handing us a final
envelope. "Now, go put on
something comfortable. You have a big day ahead of you, dear
brothers, and we will kick your butts if you are late."
With that, we were dismissed. Ethan and I changed into
comfortable shorts and shirts, opting for sneakers rather than
sandals. We discussed the possibilities of the day, both grinning
in excited anticipation. In that moment, we realized our first
lesson. Not knowing what was going to happen, the fact that we
faced it together made us feel romantically connected.
We put the suitcase in the trunk and hugged the four of them
good-bye. Following the directions, Ethan and I were on the
beltway, heading to the other side of Raven Cliff. We arrived at
a sports multiplex, offering many activities, such as batting cages and
miniature golf. Opening the envelope, we found two tickets.
Ethan opened the suitcase, and his eyes went wide with delight. "Oh, yeah!" He cried. "I have always wanted to try this!"
I looked at him questioningly, and he removed a large pistol. "It's a paintball gun." he
smiled.
We each dressed in the coveralls, putting on the goggles and caps,
which were all found in the suitcase. We looked silly, but Ethan
was so excited. Seeing him so, I became excited.
"That is lesson two, I guess."
I smiled. "Seeing that the one
you love is happy brings you happiness."
Ethan laughed. "Smart asses and
show-off's, if you ask me. Honey, this is going to be
great. I promise, you will enjoy this."
"I already am, Ethan." I
grinned.
We trotted down to the paintball area, and one of the guys showed us
how everything worked. Then, we were on our own. I have to
say it was great fun, but most of the joy I felt came from seeing Ethan
so happy. We hunted each other for a while, and Ethan delighted
in peppering me with paint splats. I did get in a few good shots,
but he was far better than I at this.
A little later, another couple was in the area, and we talked for a few
minutes. Then, Ethan and I evaded them as they hunted us.
In that situation, I was really starting to get into it. I could
feel the thrill in pulverizing someone with paintballs, so long as it
wasn't my Ethan.
We hunted like that for another hour and a half. By then, we were
all out of paintballs and breathless from exhaustion. Saying
good-bye to the other couple, Ethan and I cleaned up and disrobed,
putting everything back into the suitcase.
"See, I told you this would be fun."
Ethan chimed as we loaded the suitcase into the trunk. "You so nailed that guy! I was amazed
at how quickly you reacted."
"Well, I wasn't worried about him, and
I was protecting you, so I guess that was what made the
difference." I laughed. "I believe we should take the boys here
sometime. All of them, not just Sorrow and Chance."
"We'll have to save up for the
paintball guns. Say, maybe we could get everyone a gun and some
paintballs for Christmas." He rattled in his enthusiastic
state. Then, an evil laugh erupted. "I would so love to nail Jena and Kanawha
in this game."
I mused as he rattled on, definitely knowing lesson number two was
important. Ethan read the directions to me as we headed
out. We followed the highway to the outer edge of the south side
of the city. As soon as I saw the sign, I was thrilled,
practically bouncing in my seat.
We parked the car, and I enthusiastically kissed Ethan. I could
tell he was not as excited as I was about our second activity of the
day. "Oh, honey, this will be
wonderful. I promise you, you will have a great time, just like I
did with the paintball thing."
Ethan laughed. "Lesson number
three: Romance is a give and take." He kissed me
softly. "You cannot focus every
activity on the interests of one, or even just mutual interests.
I guess to truly know your partner, you have to do things they enjoy
the most. I had the paintballs, and you have this:
The Raven Cliff Zoo."
As I opened the envelope, I found two tickets and a gift
certificate. The tickets were for entrance into the zoo, and the
gift certificate was for a restaurant located on the grounds. "Looks like we will be eating with the
elephants." I laughed
We entered the zoo, and began our journey following the tiger tracks on
the walkway. We viewed the many animals and their habitats.
I shared with Ethan many things I had learned about each of the
animals. I just knew for sure I was boring him, but he kept
smiling at me as I talked.
Finally, I asked. "I am boring
you to death, aren't I?"
He laughed. "Actually, I was
thinking how amazing you are. I have never seen you so passionate
about something as I have today. Especially with animal and
natural habitat conservation." Then, he kissed me as a
large group of people passed by us. "To be honest, I think it is a major turn
on for me. Seeing you get all worked up like that, well, I find
it sexy." He laughed. "Lesson number four: A passionate
partner makes for a passionate time."
I held him firmly in my arms. "Well,
if you want, we can duck behind the seals and penguins for a little
while."
"Hehehe! Don't tempt me.
Remember what happened at the skating rink? I am finding I could
care less who is around us." He grinned.
He took my hand as we continued our tour through the animal
kingdom. One funny incident occurred while watching the
otters. One male otter was trying to mount another male, which
had Ethan in hysterics.
"I just find it funny." he smiled. "There are even gay otters in this world."
By this point, we were both starving, so we headed to the
restaurant. It was an OK meal, as far as the food, but being
there with Ethan made it one of the best meals I had ever eaten.
I smiled, "Lesson number five:
The quality of the activity is greatly increased by the presence of
your lover."
He laughed. "Well, the food is
fair, but I agree. This is one of the best dining experiences I
have ever had. The best would be yesterday evening, but that was
because we danced together."
Without a further thought, I took his hand and began dancing with him
beside our table. Many were giving us odd looks, but I didn't
care. I wanted to do this, for both myself and for Ethan.
Softly, he whispered in my ear. "Lesson
number six: Create your own music." Nibbling on my
neck, he continued. "Find a way
to make the most of every situation. Now, this is the best dining experience
I have ever had." He leaned his head back on my shoulder
as we continued to dance.
After our meal and dancing, we finished touring the zoo. I bought
us both a few animal souvenirs to put on our bed. Upon entering
the car, we began our drive to our final activity. We were headed
to the northern outskirts of town. Then, we took a turn that lead
way up to the top of a mountain. From there, we parked in the
parking lot as we were instructed to do so. There did not appear
to be much of anything up here. I opened the envelope to find a
note from Cole which read, "Enjoy the sunset."
There were directions to a path which lead to a patio-like
overlook.
Ethan and I held one another tightly as we watched the sun slowly
descend. It was magnificent. "Lesson number seven: Enjoy the
simple things in life, like being together." I grinned,
seeing him in the fading light. "Beauty
is all around you, but the one you hold in your arms makes it pale in
comparison."
As the last of the evening light faded, the stars lit up the heavens
and the city lights illuminated the world below. "Oh, honey. It's breathtaking."
Ethan said softly. He turned and kissed me passionately. "Honestly, this was the most romantic part
of our day. But, I think it was so romantic simply because we
spent the entire day together."
I laughed wholeheartedly. "That
brings us to lesson number eight, and I quote: 'It is not where you go or
what you do that makes romance. It is simply spending quality
time with the one you love.' Sister was right about that one,
Ethan. I cannot imagine anything being more romantic than this
moment."
He grinned seductively. "Well,
I can think of one thing to make this moment even better."
Without another word, we kissed, our passions escalating in another
round of lovemaking.
Mic
Monday
morning, I was struck with a strong need to talk with Thomas. As
soon as I awoke, I felt the urgency. I showered and dressed, but
my mind was focused upon my husband. In deep thought, I descended
the stairs and joined the family for breakfast.
At some point, I was brought from my inner turmoil enough to notice
that Ethan and Kanawha were absent from the table. Kal smiled,
saying they had an errand to run. I cannot say too much of what
other conversations went on, as I refocused my concerns towards
Thomas.
As breakfast clean up was finished, Jew, Jena, Roe, the boys, and I
headed out to work at the mission. I became aware that Chance and
Sorrow sat on each side of me. Each of our young men gently
took one of my hands in his own, patting it reassuringly.
"He's just fine, Mic."
Chance smiled. "I knows that's
who you's thinkin' 'bout."
"I believe he is thinking about you,
too." Sorrow grinned. "I can't wait to meet him. Anyone who
can captivate you so much must be one special guy."
I hugged them both to me, honored by their concern and caring
natures. "I think you boys will
like Thomas quite a bit. I know he will just love you both."
I thought back to many of our experiences before he left for his tour
of duty. "Someday, we hope to
have a family of our own. Thomas wants a house full of children,
though I am not sure we agree in numbers." I
laughed. "I told him once that
if he expected that many children, he could give birth to them."
They joined me in laughter, and my mood lightened somewhat.
"I don't reckon me 'n Sorrow's gonna
have that problem." Chance laughed. "If we ever has us some kids, I guess we
will prob'ly just find 'em like our dads found us."
Sorrow giggled, and it warmed my heart seeing their budding
relationship. "Angel, if any
guy could get pregnant, I believe it would be you."
"If either of us is gonna be pushin'
out 'em kids, I reckon it's gonna be you, Sorrow." He
laughed. "Honest, I's just fine
with given' some of 'em kids that ain't gots 'em nobody a place they
can live. I knows we'd love 'em just as much anyhow."
I was delighted by this exchange. "So, you guys are planning on a family
already, are you?"
Sorrow snickered. "Well,
yeah. From working as big brothers, Angel and I have learned that
we love children. I suppose it is only natural that we want some
of our own, someday." His grin spread across his handsome
face. "It will be
wonderful. Angel will make an excellent father, and our dads will
be awesome grandpas."
The image of Kal and Kanawha with a house full of grandchildren,
now that was something to think about. I giggled, seeing the two
of them playing around, being the goofy guys I knew they both could be
when it came to children. "I
believe you are right, Sorrow. They will be terrific
grandparents, and I feel certain that you and Chance will be phenomenal
parents."
"You've got that right."
Jena laughed as she signaled for a left turn. "Those will definitely be some lucky
children."
Jew turned to look at the boys, grinning. "You're relationship is becoming a bit
serious if you are talking about children so soon." Jena
had made such a difference in him, for Jew seldom stalled in his
speech, and I could not remember the last time he had stuttered.
Sorrow smiled, patting him on the shoulder. "All I know is there will never be anyone
for me besides Angel. I'll happily spend my life at his side."
"We's made special for each
other. I reckon that's all we need to know to see we's gonna be
together forever 'n all. We gots a long time yet 'fore any of
that happens, so we ain't in no kinda hurry or nothin'. We's just
enjoyin' each day, sharin' our dreams with each other's all."
Change chimed in, supporting Sorrow.
Jew reached over and pat Chance on the cheek. "I can't think of two better people to
raise a family than you guys." he smiled. "But, they will be my grandkids, too."
he winked.
Sorrow slid forward and hugged Jew tightly. "We both love you, too."
Chance giggled. "I reckon our
kids is gonna have 'em lots of family to get to know, and lots of
family to love 'em. I knows you guys sure love us enough."
"More than you could possibly
imagine." I smiled at him. "From the instant we met you boys, you
stole all of our hearts. Now, we can't imagine life without
either of you."
We continued our warm chat until we reached the mission. I hugged
everyone before turning to my office, once there, I could fight the
urge no longer. I just had to talk to Thomas. As I logged
on to my messenger, he was waiting for me.
I quickly pressed the microphone button. "Hey, honey. I really needed to talk
with you." I sighed.
He giggled. "I know,
baby. I just knew you needed me, probably as much as I needed
you. It is so good to hear your voice, Mic." He
paused a moment, and I could tell he was in tears. "I miss you so much. I would give
anything to hold you, even if it were for one moment."
Tears formed in my own eyes, hearing the need in his voice. "Oh, Thomas. If I could be there
right now, I would gladly do so. I know exactly what you mean,
sweetie. I miss touching and holding you, too."
His sigh spoke volumes. "Honey,
I know it is not that much longer, but I don't know how much more of
this I can take. I want to be home with you so desperately.
We should be starting our own little family, not waiting out this tour
of duty. I realize now how unfair it was of me to ask you to
marry me, only to turn around and leave like I did."
I smiled, knowing what a wonderful husband I had. "Babe, it was not by choice that you
left. You are a marine, and you do your part to protect our
freedom. It is part of who you are, honey. Knowing all you
risk every day, all the sacrifices so many have made for our freedom,
how could I not wait for you? You are a hero, Thomas. My
own, personal hero."
I could tell he was smiling by the tonal quality in his voice. "Well, I wouldn't go that far. But,
it is nice to be appreciated. Oh, Mic. I just want this to
be over."
"No more than I do, honey.
Believe me. I so miss my quality time with my husband!"
I admitted freely. Then, I giggled. "You know, a woman has needs, just as much
as a man does. I have to tell you, Thomas, I am one needy woman. But rest
assured, you are the only one who can fulfill my yearnings. There
is no one for me but you, husband."
He laughed, and I could picture his smiling face. The way the
light would dance in his eyes as his hearty chuckles reverberated from
his chest, it simply made me weak in the knees. "That has been my every waking thought,
Mic. I love you, and only you. God only knows how much I
want to show you just how deeply my love for you has grown."
"Oh, Thomas. I know you love
me. As much as my love for you has strengthened, I am certain
that yours has for me, too. Never worry about my not knowing,
honey. I feel it everyday in my heart." I assured
him. He sent me a file, so I accepted it, and we continued
talking while it downloaded.
"Mic, I don't like to talk negatively,
but if something were to happen to me, it makes me feel better knowing
that you understand how much you mean to me. You are the better
part of my life, my reason for getting out of bed each morning.
Your face is the first thing I see when I wake and the last thing I
remember at night. Just promise me that no matter what, you will
remember that." He said softly.
"Nothing is going to happen to you,
babe. But, for your peace of mind, I will." As tears
flowed from my soul, I continued. "You just remember that your wife loves you
more than anything in this world. I am here, Thomas, patiently
waiting. I am not going anywhere."
I could once again hear tears in his voice. "Mic, honey, I am going to have to go
soon. Some of the other guys will need to use the computer.
The file just finished downloading, so promise me you will use it any
time you think of me." He took a long pause, and I knew
something was wrong. "Mic, they
are sending us on a support mission to the war zone in the
morning. I have no idea when I will get to chat with you again,
so remember that I love you, always."
My heart ached, but I tried my best to be strong for Thomas. "Husband, I will hold you again, just as we
have been planning. I love you, honey, with all my heart."
He sniffled. "I know,
baby. I have to go now, Mic, but promise me you will use the
file."
"I'll start it now, sweetie."
I vowed.
"It's just to let you know how much I
love you. I really have to go now, Mic. I love you."
"I love you, too, Thomas."
I said as he disconnected and the file loaded. It was a slide
show, with pictures of Thomas and I together, our wedding, pictures I
had sent to him over the net, and pictures of him during his
tour. Playing in the background was the most moving song I had
ever heard. It expressed our feelings for each other perfectly.
I wanna grow old with you
Another day
Without your smile
Another day
Just passes by
But now I know
How much it means
For you to stay
Right here with me
The time we spend apart
Will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad
I can't take it any longer
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you
A thousand miles
Between us now
It causes me
To wonder how
Our love tonight
Remains so strong
It makes our risk
Right all along
The time we spend apart
Will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad
I can't take it any longer
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you
Things can come and go I know but
Baby I believe
Something's burning strong between us
Makes it clear to me
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you
I
wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you
Slowly,
the reality of it all sank in, and my heart burst with deep pains of
sorrow and worry. I was lost, and my hero was so far away.
Softly, a knock at my door began.
I opened the door to find Sorrow and Chance, with tears streaking
down both their faces. "We knows
what's going on, Mic. We both wanted to be here for ya, if that's
OK 'n all." Chance said quietly.
I clung tightly to them both, unleashing my pain. "Oh, boys!" I cried.
They both held me snugly as I released my emotional baggage. "It's going to be fine."
Sorrow soothed.
"He's gonna need your lovin' now more
'n ever." Chance encouraged. "Hold tight to it 'n don't give in to your
worryin'."
Sorrow stroked my back gently. "Have
faith, Mic. Now is not the time to doubt. He will be safe,
you just have to believe it."
"God's a watchin' out for him.
We knows he's gonna come home just fine. You's gotta believe is
all." Chance agreed.
They continued to soothe and comfort me while I cried out. When
all my tears were shed, we prayed. A peace like none I had
experienced before fell upon me, and I knew the boys were right.
"I think maybe you should go home
today and rest. Chance and I called Roe, and he is on his way to
pick us up." Sorrow reassuringly smiled.
"Us?" I questioned
lightheartedly.
"You don't think we's gonna leave you
or nothin' now do ya?" Chance grinned.
"After all you have done for me, Mic,
it is the least we can do for you." Sorrow added.
"Fine with me, boys, but I don't want
your Dad to know until after his date with your Daddy. There is
no sense in ruining their day, because I know Kal will cancel his plans
if
he thinks I even remotely need him." I replied in
honesty. "God, I just pray he
doesn't pick up on it."
Sorrow smiled at Chance.
"We'll make sure he doesn't." I grinned at them, but my
mind was racing, wondering if they could really do that.
Roe came to my office, and I could tell he had been crying. "Oh, gurl. He is going to be all
right. He just has to be." He sighed.
I smiled at him, hugging him tightly. "Of course he will, Roe. The boys and
I just prayed about it." Then, I grinned at them. "Plus, I have their word he will return to
us safely, so I will not worry about it. I will hold true to my
faith."
"That's all it's gonna take,
Mic. Just havin' you some faith." Chance beamed,
hugging Sorrow tightly. Then, he looked at his newly found
boyfriend. "I's real proud of
you, too, Sorrow. You just keeps on a growin'."
Roe grinned at them. "Well,
there word is good enough for me. When they called and told me
what was going on, I was sick with panic. Then, they said they
were coming here to check on you." He paused a moment in
realization. Then, he smiled again. "You boys are so much like Kal, it's kind
of scary."
"I wouldn't say scary." I
laughed. "It's more like
humbling."
"Well, let's go see Jena and
Jew. Then, I will take you guys home." Roe laughed.
We stopped by to explain the situation to the two of them. Roe
added in that the boys promised his safe return in exchange for our
faith. Roe called them our little prophets, which
had them both blushing. Somewhere in his words, however, I
suspected he was close to realizing their true potential.
After saying our good-byes, we headed home. Kal and Shaft were
pulling out the driveway as we were turning around the block.
Relief passed through me, as I smiled at the boys.
Roe dropped us off, and after my assuring him that I would be fine, he
returned to the mission. The boys and I headed into the
house. We played with the pups for a while, then I decided to
retire to my room, suspecting Kal would be home shortly.
Special
authors note: As I am finishing this chapter up, getting
it ready to send out, I received the call. The price of freedom
is often high, but I thank God that price did not include you,
buddy. I have been rejoicing since your mom called to let me know
your plane landed safely. Welcome home! As one of my
dearest friends, I have been thinking about you constantly, especially
when I held my godson. She didn't even know she was pregnant when
you left, and now your son is almost nine months old. Enjoy him,
and hold him as long as you want (Don't let your mom tell you
otherwise. We all know how fussy she can be ;D) because you have
more than earned it! Just remember, he may be an infant, but he
still tells me when he doesn't get his way. Now, he has a hero to
look up too. God bless you, my friend and brother. I hope
to see you soon.
Chance
I's
real sad that mic was goin' through what she was 'n all, but I knowed
it would turn out just fine. It still made me cry though,
thinkin' how much ol' Thomas was givin up 'n all to make the world a
safe place for Mic and 'em kids they was gonna have sometime
soon. I thought it was one of the nicest things I's ever heard
'fore.
Daddy 'n Dad got home later, but they was kinda busy. I don't
reckon they realized we's home 'n not at the mission till lots
later. By then, Pops was on his way to get me 'n Sorrow to come
spend the night with 'im. He got there, and our dads told 'im
'bout their day up to that point. He smiled at 'em both, tellin'
Daddy to take care of his Sonny.
Then, we put our stuff in his trunk 'n headed to his house.
Sorrow sat with me in the back seat, cause he wanted to hold my hand 'n
kiss 'n stuff. I's likin kissin' Sorrow cause he was real
good at it. His lips was all soft like and they made me feel all
funny like ever time he touched me with 'em. Sometimes, he put
his tongue in there too, and I liked 'em kisses even better 'n the
other n's.
Once we got there, I was kindly impressed. It was a real nice
place, even had a pool 'n everthin'. He showed us to our
room. I noticed there was more 'n one place for people stayin'
with 'im to sleep, but he just smiled 'n winked at us, sayin' he
figured we didn't mind sharin' no room. It was fine by me, cause
I don't reckon I'd get much sleep without Sorrow bein' next to me.
We's put our stuff up 'n looked 'round. Sorrow said he ain't
never been to Pops place 'fore, and I felt awful sorry for 'em
both. They sure had missed out on knowin' one 'nother, that was
for sure. As we was lookin' 'round the room, I found this picture
book. In it was all kinds of pictures of Sorrow when he's little
with some guy who looked like Dad quite a bit. Sorrow sat down on
the bed 'side me, and we was lookin' through it.
Sorrow told me that fella was David, and I reckon he was kinda
handsome, but not near as much as my Sorrow was. On back in the
book, we found lots of stuff that had been cut out of one of 'em
papers. They's all stories 'bout football 'n baseball.
Sorrow's name was in some of 'em. Sorrow was grinnin', sayin' he
never knowed his Pop was followin' his games 'n all that. I
reckoned Pops did lots of things he didn't know 'bout.
Pops come in the room, and I pat a place for 'im to sit on the bed next
to me, since I was holdin' the book. We was lookin' at 'em same
pictures again, and Pops told us stories 'bout how David 'n Sorrow was
such a handful when they was growin' up. Sometime durin' one of
Pops stories, I realized somethin'.
I looked at Sorrow, and then he knowd it too. "Pop, you don't blame yourself over David's
death, do you?" He asked as easy like as he could.
Pops got real teary like, rubbin' on one of David's picture with his
fingers. "I should have seen it
coming, Eric. I should have done something to help him."
he said as he started cryin' all quiet like. I rubbed 'im on the
back, and he smiled at me a moment, then started talkin' again. "He never felt he could turn to me, I
guess. I still don't even know why he did it, Eric.
He did not even trust us enough to leave a note."
Sorrow got up off the bed 'n stood in front of Pops, holdin' him to his
chest. "Pop, David loved
you. I know he did. I can remember him telling you that all
the time." Sorrow lifted his head real gentle like,
lookin' into Pops' eyes. "I
blamed myself for so long, Pop. But, now I know better.
Neither of us are to blame, and neither of us could have done anything
differently to change what happened. We both thought David was
fine, and I guess that is what he wanted us to think. We may
never know why he did it, but we do know he loved us. And, we
both know we loved him. That is all we have, Pop. That, and
each other."
Pops smiled real big, then started cryin' again, holdin' real tight to
my big ol' angel. "Oh,
Eric. I was so frightened after it all happened...
devastated, really. I just knew for sure it was something that I
had done. That is why I left." He was a sobbin' real
hard then. So was me 'n Sorrow. "I didn't want to ruin your life, too, and
in trying to save you from myself, I ended up hurting you. You
almost did the same thing." He was so sad then.
Sorrow just kept holdin' 'im, rubbin' on his back. "Pop, I never knew why you stayed away from
me, but I guess it makes sense, now you've told me. Regardless,
though, I didn't kill myself, Pop. I'm still here."
He then got real sad too, cryin' somethin' awful. I was all to
pieces wonderin' what to do, cause when Sorrow was hurtin', I was
hurtin' with 'im. "I love you,
Pop. And, I forgive you." he said.
I got up 'n hugged 'em both while they kept on
cryin'. Finally, Pops spoke up. "I love you, Eric. I always
have. If you believe nothing else, just believe that much."
his face was all pleadin'.
"I do, Pop." Sorrow
grinned at 'im.
As they was huggin', I stepped back a piece, lookin' at 'em.
Then, I was feelin' somethin' real strong like for Sorrow. I
don't know what you'd call it, but he was lookin' awful good to me
right then. Wasn't his looks, to be honest, it was more 'n
that. The way he was bein' so nice to Pops 'n all, it made me
feel different 'bout 'im. I knows I loved 'im 'fore all this, but
I knows I loved 'im lots more after that.
When Sorrow 'n Pops was finished cryin', they both hugged for a long
time. Then, they both looked at me, reachin' out one of their
arms to me. I walked up to 'em and they both hugged me all tight
like. "I love you, Angel.
Because of you, I am better than I have ever been." Sorrow
said, kissin' me on the head.
Pops laughed. "I love you, too,
Chance, for many reasons. One is simply because I can.
Another is because you are perfect for Eric, and you make him
happy. Mostly, though, it is because you just have this way about
you." He smiled down at me. "I guess you are just easy to love, and
impossible not to love."
I's all red then, and Sorrow kissed me. "I told you before Pop, that is why he's my
angel." He held me real close to 'im 'n started swayin'
with me. "I would love to dance
with you again sometime soon, Angel. I really enjoyed that last
night."
"Well, I could teach you boys a few
more steps if you want." Pops smiled.
"Yeah, I think that would be fun."
Sorrow grinned over at 'im.
"Tell you what, boys... Let's order us
a couple of pizzas and sort out some music. Then, I will teach
you all I know about dancing." Pops was real 'cited bout
that, and so was Sorrow 'n me.
We searched through 'em records waitin' on that pizza to get
there. Pops put on some music, and that lady sounded lots like
Hela. Pops showed us how we was 'posed to be workin' our feet 'n
stuff. Then, we's dancin'. He'd tell us if we was doin'
somethin' wrong, but mostly he just smiled at us. The doorbell
rung 'n Pops went to answer it while Sorrow 'n me kept on
dancin'.
Pops come into the room to get his money, followed by that fella who
brought us 'em pizzas. He looked at me 'n Sorrow real funny like,
so's I's feelin' awful uncomfortable like. Pops saw 'im a lookin'
at us 'n laughed. "I was just
teaching Eric and his boyfriend how to dance." He grinned.
"His boyfriend?" That
fella asked all amazed like. "And,
you are OK with this?"
"Why wouldn't I be? Chance is a
great kid, and he really loves Eric. There is nothing more I
could want for Eric than that." Pops laughed.
That guy just shook his head. "Well,
you're handling this a lot better than most people would. My
parent's freaked when they met my sister's girlfriend. They
refuse to discuss it, but Sis swears when she finishes high school, she
is going to leave for college and never come back home."
"Why don't you bring her to our group
meeting?" Sorrow asked 'im. He got 'im a pen and
wrote down where and when to go to the meetin'. "We would love to have you both, her
girlfriend, too, if you want to bring her." Sorrow smiled
at 'im, tellin' 'im all 'bout the group. Pops paid that guy, and
he left, tellin' Sorrow he'd talk with 'is sister 'bout it.
We ate us some of that ol' pizza 'n it was the best I's eaten
yet. Then, we danced some more. Pops danced with us some,
showin' us lots of turns 'n bends 'n stuff like that. We had us a
real good time laughin' 'n carryin' on. Then, we gots ready for
bed. Pops hugged us both, tellin' us night 'n all.
"I's had a great time dancin' with
you. I think Pops is gonna be lots of fun to be 'round."
I grinned, 'n Sorrow was still lookin' REAL GOOD to me.
He grabbed my hand, 'n we danced some more in that room with no music
or nothin' like that. He looked at me, smilin' real big
like. Then, he kissed me awful good. This 'n was a real
long kiss, and his hands was rubbin' me just a little bit, so I's a
rubbin' on 'im too. They's makin' me feel real funny, though, but
not in a bad way or nothin'. I think we's both gettin' too 'cited
or somethin', so we just looked at each other for a real long
time. He kissed me again, and we got ready to go to sleep.
Sorrow put his head on my chest 'n hugged me up real tight.
I held his head close to me, tellin' 'em I loved 'im.
"I love you, too, Angel." he
said to me smilin'. Then, we kinda went to sleep, just enjoyin'
bein' close together 'n all.
Kanawha
I was so excited Monday morning. We had worked diligently between
church services on Sunday to get everything moved from the
townhouse. I was officially living with my beloved, and the
thoughts had aroused a passionate night for us both. I suppose we
broke my old bed/our new bed in, but good.
Sneaking away from Killian, I bounded down the stairs, running into
Ethan in the kitchen. We chatted casually while I searched for
the box of dry goods we had moved from the townhouse. It was
nowhere to be found, and my heart sank quickly. Frantically
tearing into the cabinets, I found that the items were not there either.
"Why are you in such a panic?"
Ethan asked humorously.
"There was a box from the townhouse
with the flour and things in it. Have you seen it?"
I asked rather hastily.
"Oh, that. Well, it is out in
the garbage. Jena had me bag it up and take it out last
night. She said it was all old stuff, anyway." He
commented as my heart sank to depths far beyond dismay. "Big guy, what's wrong?"
I darted out the back door quickly, only to see the trash truck driving
off. Standing in my pajamas, I ranted and raved at the dilemma I
was now facing. I ran back into the house, quickly searching for
my keys and cell phone. As I was slipping on my shoes, Ethan
stopped me.
"Kanawha, what's wrong?"
he looked so worried.
"Just my luck is returning."
I stated flatly. "I hope I can
catch the truck in time, but I have a feeling this is going to be a
long day."
Ethan put on his shoes and followed me to the car. As we drove
off, I called Love, praying to God that Killian would not know what was
going on. "Hey Love... Well, I
know you are surprised I am calling you, but something has come
up. Ethan and I are running a small errand... No, hopefully it
will not take too long... I know Love. I cannot wait to spend the
day with you either... I love you, too... OK, I'll call you as soon as
we are done." With that, I hung up the phone.
Ethan watched me for a minute. "So,
do you mind telling me why we are driving, clad in our pajamas, in
pursuit of the trash truck?" he asked cautiously.
As much as I tried to see the humor in it all, I was distraught.
Then, I saw the trash truck pulling out from between a couple of
houses. "Thank God!"
I exclaimed. "There it is!"
I was so excited, and I felt a small tinge of hope.
Silently, we followed. Several miles later, it turned up a
winding road. at the end was the city land fill. As the
truck stopped to wait in line, I quickly put the car in park and ran to
the driver.
He laughed at my story, but in seeing my face, he noted his
sympathy. I followed him to a clearing, where he dumped out the
contents of his truck. An entire mountain of refuse was left in
its wake. I exited the car again, leaving Ethan to wait for my
return. The driver explained my predicament to the man with the
dozer, and he said he would leave this area untouched until I was
finished. Then, I returned to the passenger side.
Ethan rolled down the window, as I asked him, "Eth, buddy, this is important. Do
you remember what kind of bag you put everything in?"
He thought a moment. "It was a
large black bag with the yellow tie strings. Why?"
I shook my head sadly. "It is
never easy, is it?" I asked to no one in particular.
"Yoo-hoo. Remember me?"
Ethan said, expressing his annoyance. "I am the guy who has asked you why we are
here several times, yet you still keep neglecting to answer me."
I smiled at him. Where I found the courage to smile, I will never
know. "Let's just say that my
future depends upon me finding that bag. I would tell you all
about it, but you cannot know. If Love reads it from you, then it
will ruin everything."
Ethan snickered. "You know, I have heard some lame excuses
from you in the past, but this one sure takes the cake." Then, he opened the car
door. "Well, let's get at it,
then."
I looked at him seriously. "Ethan,
you don't have to do this. I know how you are about being
dirty. I can do this alone."
He hugged me, laughing. "Don't
get a big head over this, but if anyone is worth getting dirty over,
you would be one of the top ones on my list." Then, he
looked at the trash pile. "It
just had to be trash."
As we began rummaging in the first couple of bags, the foul
stench had us both gagging. One look at Ethan, as he used the
very tips of his fingers to move things about had me tickled.
Then, I burst into strong laughter, seeing the entire scene as others
passing by us must.
Smiling, I hugged the little guy. "Thanks, Eth. I needed a good laugh."
With a look of disgust on his face from the smells of the trash, he
replied. "Glad you could find
this all so amusing."
"Well, look at it this way. What
would you do if you saw two men, dressed in pajamas, pilfering through
a mountain of trash?" I giggled.
"Wonder what the hell was up with
them, I guess." he said wryly. "Or, why the hell they were digging in the
trash to find a bunch of old food..." he mumbled.
"When this is over, I promise you will
understand, Ethan." I assured him.
He then told me about his and Shaft's big day. I was really happy
for them both, as they seemed so happy together. I knew he had
made such a difference in Ethan. He was stronger, more confident,
and I loved Shaft for that. I loved Shaft for being Shaft,
honestly, but his effect on Ethan was a positive bonus.
We continued ripping through the trash. "EEWE!" Ethan cried. "This one is definitely not ours, unless
someone in the house has shitty diapers and is not telling
anyone."
I could tell he was a bit pissed with me as he wiped some of the
diaper's contents from his hand on an old newspaper. I almost
collapsed, I was laughing so hard. Grinning, he slung one of the
diapers at me, hitting me in the chest. "Now, see how funny you think it is,
asshole."
Before I knew it, we were peppering one another with trash, laughing
hysterically at the other's appearance and reaction. After a few
minutes, we calmed back down and began our search again, each
occasionally chuckling.
"Well, what have we here?"
I commented.
"You found it?" he asked
excitedly.
"No, but I found a Johnny Black,
Secret Agent action figure." I grinned, remembering how
Ethan and I used to play with them as children. "You used to take the clothes off of yours
so you could see his rippling muscles.
I should have known then that you were into guys." I shot.
Ethan giggled. "Man, he had one
fine body, though... Even if it was made out of plastic."
Then, he became somewhat serious. "You know, I always wondered where they
came up with the body proportions for those guys. I have never
seen a live person look anywhere near like Johnny Black."
I snickered. "Well, if he is
such a disappointment for you, then I guess I will throw him back in
the bag."
Grabbing the doll, Ethan laughed, "He
was my childhood fantasy." After a moments admiration, he
then tucked Johnny securely under his arm. "I'll put him in the car in a little while."
We continued our search, occasionally finding something worth
commenting about. Ethan found a few treasures, but we had yet to
find the object of our search. My cell began ringing, and I knew
it would not be good.
"Ethan, will you answer it. If I
do, then he can read it out of me." I explained, dreading
the idea of him knowing how I had messed up our romantic day together.
Ethan grinned, fishing my phone out of my pajama pocket. "Kanawha's pants." He answered
laughing. "Well, they were down
around his ankles, so I thought I would just get the phone... Hehehe!
Yeah, we are fine... Well, tell that hunk of mine not to worry, we will
be home sometime soon... Well, Kal, he is a little busy at the
moment, but I will tell him to call you back as soon as he can... Don't
worry. You know the big buffoon loves you more than life
itself... Yeah, I guess you could say we are having an interesting day,
though it would be a far stretch calling it fun... all right, I will...
You, too. Bye." Hanging up the phone and returning
it to my pocket, he smiled. "Kal
wants you to call him, like I needed to tell you that."
"Eth, what am I going to do?"
I was so doubting things at this point. "I have the love of my life waiting for me
for a day of romance, and I am here in the bowels of Trash Hell because
I am such a moron. Could I have screwed things up any worse?"
Ethan hugged me, patting my back. "I'm not sure about what we are even
looking for in this mess, but I imagine it had the best of intentions
behind it. You're a great guy, Kanawha, and Kal knows this.
Don't sell yourself short over something that wasn't even your fault."
Ethan was returning to his old self, starting to own up to blame that
wasn't his. "Look, Ethan.
It wasn't your fault, and I have never even thought of blaming you for
any of this. How could you have known I am such a dumb ass?
That stuff had been in the cabinet forever, so I figured it would be a
safe place to hide it. I should have told you and Jena that the
box was important, but I didn't think about it. I just figured
the less who knew, the less likely it was for Love to find out."
"Well, we have always known you were a
dumb ass, big guy." He jabbed. "I guess this is all just a big accident,
but if it causes you any heat, I will take the brunt of it all. I
owe you that much." Ethan smiled.
"Well, I guess it would be better for
Kal to kick your ass than mine." I giggled. "Eth, we just have to find that damn bag!"
Frantically, we searched for the next two hours. We were down to
the last bag, when Love and Shaft pulled up. I quickly ripped the
bag open, only to be disappointed yet again.
"See, I told you he would read it out
of you. That is honestly the only reason I haven't said more,
Eth." I said in dismay.
"Are you sure that was the right
truck?" Ethan asked quietly, seeing Kal and Shaft were
approaching us.
"Well, not exactly. I was just
kinda hoping it was." I admitted.
"You know, if it was not the right
truck, I might just have to kill you and stuff your body under this
pile of stench." Ethan giggled.
"You stand me up to take Ethan to the
playground?" Love chuckled. "Oh, Love! Look at you!"
He laughed.
"Honey, do you realize what kind of
diseases you can pick up from playing in the trash?" Shaft
joked with Ethan. "I guess we
should take you boys to the hospital for your vaccinations immediately."
Love embraced me, just as Shaft hugged Ethan. We were ready to
kiss our men, when our men backed away from us. "OH, Love!" Killian cried,
pinching his nose. "That is one
smell I will NEVER forget."
"Baby," Shaft said, in a
mirrored position to Love, "I think
we need to hose you down. I think you are taking the image of trashy blond a bit too far."
"Do you want to be sleeping all alone,
or are you going to quit being such an ass?" Ethan replied
sarcastically.
Love laughed. "You two are a
mess. What in the blazes has gotten into you? Why are you
rooting around in garbage?"
"It just seemed like the thing to
do." I quipped. "Ethan
and I were discussing the things we had yet to do in our lives, and,
amazingly, this was number two on both our lists."
"Well, do you think we could tear you
away from all of your fun long enough to spend the day with us?"
Shaft asked, pretending to be hurt.
I was ready to throw in the towel and explain it all, when Valerie's
words struck me again. "Please,
God!" I cried out, turning around. There, all by
itself sat one lonely black bag with a yellow tie. Cautiously
walking towards it, I poured all the faith I could muster into my
heart. "I'll be.... Thank you,
Lord!" I cheered. Then, I offered up a silent prayer
of thanks.
""Alleluia!" Ethan
grinned, peering into the bag.
I toted the bag to the car, sitting it down to open the trunk.
Love peered into the bag. "Love,
I know we talked about saving back as much money as we can for the
boys' futures, but I think this is carrying it a bit too far."
He chuckled.
I put the bag in the trunk, and turned to him. "Shut up, smart ass, and get in the
car. We have a date, remember?" I smiled.
"Well, I'm ready if you are."
he jabbed. "Let's go to the
restaurant right now." As he opened the door, he found
Johnny. "What is this?"
He asked, smirking at me with his eyebrow raised.
Ethan grabbed him up, along with his other trinkets. "I'll take him, thank you."
Then, he looked at Shaft. "For
being such an ass crusty, you don't get to look at Johnny with his
shirt off."
Shaft laughed as the two of them piled into his car. We all
headed back to the house. Love had the window down, laughing
about the smell. "And you made fun of the fish
smell. See how things come back to haunt you?" He
joked.
As we pulled into the driveway, the boys came out to greet us.
They backed away quickly as the smell of Ethan and myself drifted
through the air, snickering at the sight of us. I opened the
trunk and pulled out a box of macaroni from the trash bag.
Entering the house, Love smiled at me. "You really need a shower, Love. Go
on up, and I will join you shortly."
I handed him the box of macaroni. "Actually, while I am showering, why don't
you cook this up for us. I am starving, and I am craving some
macaroni and tomatoes." I grinned.
He just looked at me like I had lost my mind. "You don't actually want to eat this, do
you?"
"Love, this is macaroni from Georgia."
I laughed.
"They sell this same brand here, too,
you know. How about a new box, and we through this one away?"
He replied.
"The kind from Georgia is
better." I shot. "Everything
in Georgia is better. Now, just go cook it, and I will be down as
soon as I get cleaned up." I smiled.
Looking at me as if I were completely insane, Love turned and went into
the kitchen.
I darted up the stairs and stripped out of my pajama's as soon as I was
in our room. I was walking to the bathroom when I found a
chocolate kiss on the floor. Then there was another. A
whole trail of them, in fact, led to the shower. Tears filled my
eyes as I took in the sight.
There were twelve dozen roses sitting in the shower, surrounded by at
least eighty bags worth of hugs and kisses. On the shower wall,
there hung another dozen roses, along with a note from Love, which read:
"I have given you
flowers and showered you with hugs and kisses. I love you, but
what more does a guy have to do to get you to marry him? Perhaps
ask, I guess. Kanawha, will you do me the honor of becoming my
life partner, committing yourself to me in a ceremony at our church, in
front of God, our sons, and our family?"
At the bottom of the note was a wedding band. Inscribed were the
words "My Love,
Forever and a Day." Blinded by tears, I started sprinting
to my love. Thinking and feeling the draft, I grabbed my robe and
then continued
running to him.
Killian
The idea of cooking trash infested macaroni was not to my liking, let
me tell you. It was just irrational. But, if that was what
Love wanted, then I would do it. I found a colander, thinking if
I washed the macaroni well, it might be better. 'Hopefully,' I shuddered, 'the boiling will be enough to kill any
germs.'
I was surprised when I dumped the box into the colander. I picked
up the envelope and slowly opened it. I removed the card and was
quickly moved to tears by each word I read:
"Love, this is my
backup plan. Call me a pessimist all you want, but I have had
such a good run of luck since you brightened my world, I am not willing
to take any chances. Sooner or later, my old luck is bound to
rear its ugly head. So, if you are reading this, then I guess I
was unfortunately right. First, let me say how truly sorry I am
for ruining our day, though I have no idea how I managed to do it at
this point."
"You deserve the very
best, and try as I may to give it to you, sometimes I fail. My
plans were for a lovely day and evening, filled with good, southern
romance. Then, I wanted to do this properly. Seeing that
something has gone awry, I hope this will do. In my heart, I
could never love you more. You are simply the greatest gift
I have ever received. Your love has brought me to life in ways I
never dreamed could happen. With you by my side, I know that all
things are possible. After all, a big bonehead like me found a
wonderful man like you."
"Love, will you marry
me? I know in our hearts we have dedicated our lives to one
another, but I would like to have a ceremony. I want God, our
sons, and our family to witness our commitment to each other, and to
have their blessings upon our union. Maybe I am old fashioned,
but my love for you could never be more true."
In the center of the card was a wedding band. Inscribed were the
words "I love
you, Always and Forever." I noticed the band was a perfect
match to the one I bought for Love. Then, I remembered the
shower. As swiftly as I could move, I darted out the kitchen to
my love.
We met in the middle of the staircase, both shedding tears of
joy. "Oh, Love! You have
made me the happiest man to ever walk this earth." I
smiled, pulling him close as he encased me in his loving arms.
"You would have to be the second
happiest man, because I have you. That makes me by far happier
than you could ever be." he sighed.
After an eternity in his embrace, I smiled, gazing at him. "Love?"
"Yes, Love?" He grinned.
"I love you more than anything, but
YOU STINK!"
Kanawha laughed, and I took his hand, leading him to the shower.
After removing the flowers and the candy, I washed his body carefully
and thoroughly. Then, I let him kiss me.
"I suppose we should start getting
ready." He said, hinting for me to get out of the
shower. "We have a big day
ahead of us."
I smiled at him. "Honestly,
Love, I could think of nothing better or more romantic than spending
the day with you in our room."
"Well, we could do that, if you would
not be too disappointed." he smirked.
I grabbed his manhood in my hand, grinning. "Now, how could you possibly disappoint me,
Love?"
Nothing more needed to be said. We spent the next few hours
making love repeatedly to each other. Finally exhausted, we
showered again, dressed and joined everyone downstairs.
The boys were getting ready to leave with Derek. He called me
Sonny again, and I was moved to tears. I knew how special that
name was to him, and I was deeply honored he felt that way about
me. I mused to myself that it would be nice to have a father,
seeing that David and I would be close to the same age if he were still
alive. We kissed our young men good-bye, commenting on how cute
they were together. Then, we went back inside.
After visiting with the family, Love and I joined Ethan and Shaft for
dinner and a movie. It was a great time double dating with our
dear friends... well, they were truly more like our brothers. I
was able to connect on a closer level to Ethan, as was Love to
Shaft. Overall, it was one of the most romantic times I had ever
had. The only one better would be the moment I met my love in the
bookstore. After all, that was the day my life truly began.
Well,
this completes chapter nine. Thanks for reading, and please
let me
know what you think. Chapter ten will be coming soon.
I Wanna Grow Old with
You
Lyrics
by: McFadden, Filan,
Egan ©2001