From: Gary Subject: The Pizza Shop 1 of 2 Date: Tue, 21 Jan 1997 18:49:13 -0500 The Pizza Shop Part 1 of 2 As I walked into the corner pizza place, I couldn't help but feel the warmth rush into my dick as I looked upon the man of my dreams behind the counter. Steven was of Arab heritage which was evident in my dark brooding eyes and black as coal hair. My hair was cut in the style that had become the rage of the times -- the caesar cut. Steven's height of 5'11'' was filled out by a lanky kind of body, and the face was framed by a stylish goatee. The only drawback was the wedding band on my left ring finger. Other then that, Steven was perfect. I leaned over the counter and gave my order to Steven. I couldn't help but look directly into the eyes of Steven and think of what it would be like to commit all kinds of sordid sex acts on my fabulous body. I long ago had realized that I deserved the academy award for leading male actor in real life. After all, for 30 years I had pretended to the world that I was a straight man, and the fact was that I had learned my part very well. Actually, all gay men probably deserve that award at sometime in their life. So instead of acting on impulse, I simply sat down to wait for my food. As I sat there, I couldn't help but peek at Steven out of the corner of my eyes. Every now and then, I became sad when I thought about what I wanted out of life, and what life had given me. I realized that the fates had played a few jokes with my life. For instance, I was considered to be a very good looking man who should have been in the movies. Also, I could have had any girl that I wanted, for I never had a lack of attention from women. Unfortunately, women were not what I desired. One of my best friends had once told me that I was one of the last really good looking gay men still alive and disease free. I truly believed in my heart that someday I would find my soul mate, I just didn't know when. It was in the middle of my daydreaming that I realized that somebody was talking to me. It was Steven! Steven had lately started to make conversation with me and it was very hard to resist the urge to kiss his succulent lips. So instead I did my best imitation of a mildly retarded man and mostly muttered yes or no to the questions being posed to me. Conversation with straight men could be a very tricky issue since straight men are constantly worried about being raped by gay men. It was part of the baggage they carried around with them. They suffered from the disease of thinking they were much better looking then they really were. Only in the case of Steven, it was a thought that was very much correct. Steven then asked a question that struck me as somewhat strange. "Are you married or do you have a girlfriend?" I answered that I had neither and was not looking for either at this point in my life. A look passed over Steven's face that was between a smile and grimace. The next question out of Steven's lips was enough to floor me. "Would you be interested in a man then?" I just stood there with my bottom lip scraping the floor and then muttered maybe. When a straight man asks questions dealing with sexual partners and personal preference, it is a wise fag that remains elusive. Now I'm sure that there are those out in the world that would say that definitive answers are best and that gay men should scream from the rafters that we are gay and proud. Unfortunately, unless you live in an enlightened area, those gay men who are proud and loud often wind up in hospital emergency rooms. For the record, I am proud, just not that loud. Well, I digress from my tale. The time had come to make a statement, I just didn't think I could. As I have said, straight men have a great deal of emotional baggage and getting around it is sometimes difficult. Actually, going through minefields is probably easier. Gay men have their own baggage(myself included), but at least its all pretty easy to figure out. Unfortunately, I have always suffered from an attraction to straight men. There is something to be said for a blue-collar straight man. After all, how would you react if a total stranger suggested to you that you take off all your clothes and then proceed to have sex right there. Imagine that you are STRAIGHT first though. Not so pleasant an idea, is it? The idea of having sex with Steven is the most amazing idea to me. Just imagine a lanky Steve Kelso and then you'll see why I buy pizza once a week. (to be continued)