Date: Fri, 17 Jul 2020 10:38:46 +0100
From: Alain Mahy <amahy1957@gmail.com>
Subject: Solitude 2

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	After my short story with Frank, I shut myself up in my solitude.
I promised myself I would never fall in love again, although I knew that I
wouldn't be able to keep that promise.  I excluded the outside world out of
mine, but being honest, I have to admit I am not someone who likes
loneliness.  I live it, I resign myself to it, I submit to it but I never
accept it.  After Frank's death, I had no choice anymore and had to go into
therapy if I didn't want to become completely crazy and out of control.  I
felt so guilty to had waited too long before going for him after he had
been silent.  I left him alone for almost three weeks and couldn't forgive
myself.  I never knew how he died.  I had no possibility to get any news
about it.  Now that the bar was closed, I didn't even have the opportunity
to talk to John as I had no means to find him.

	Therapy was fastidious.  I abandoned the first therapist after the
first session as he was clearly not professional and just tried to change
me from gay to straight and forget about being gay.  My problem was not
being gay.  My problem was that I couldn't accept that Frank was gone.  I
won't give you the details about the second and the third therapist who
were evenly stupid although in different ways.  It was the fourth
therapist, Aidan, who tried sincerely to help me out of that state of
depression I had gotten myself into.  Aidan was so patient with me and
listened carefully (as he was supposed to) to everything I told him.  For
him it was not Frank that was important.  The most important fact was that
I had lost someone I loved and that I had issues accepting it and getting
over it.  I had a real connection with Aidan and knew he understood me.  I
even suspected he had lived a similar situation.  Our weekly session went
on for months and little by little I learned how to smile again.  Aidan
made me see that I had no reason to feel guilty about anything.

	At the same time he taught me how to face my solitude and just for
that, I will be grateful to him for the rest of my life.  Even today, if my
loneliness get's too hard for me, I can call him although I am not his
patient anymore.  We developed a fantastic friendship.  Once he said the
therapy was over, we started to see each other outside his practice and
went out for meals or a movie and even did some city trips together.  Aidan
became the friend I never had before.  Yes, he is gay, but we never had
anything sexual together.  We openly admitted we were not sexually
attracted to each other.  Our minds were attracted to each other.  After my
therapy, he opened up to me, sharing more personal things.  I was no
therapist, but I always listened to him respectfully.

	The other thing, when we went out together, was that our tastes in
men was completely different.  I would never go out with people he was
attracted to and vice versa.  There was never any competition between
us... except in the kitchen.  We both loved to cook.  We had some
tremendous discussions about how one or the other dish had to be prepared.
The result was always that we would both prepare the same dish and then try
them both.

	In a nutshell and with time, Aidan became my best friend.  We had
absolutely no secrets for each other and he had analyzed me so well during
therapy that he knew me inside out like no-one else.  I always listened to
him and paid very close attention to what he said.  He knew what was good,
or bad, for me better than anyone in this world.  Aidan often wrote
articles for a psychology magazine and he even used my case to explain the
process of mourning and how to get over it.  With time, he became a
specialist in this field and an absolute reference in his professional
world.  It even happened that he would call me in with other patients and
share my experience of what happened with Frank.  I gladly helped him.

	In one of these occasions he called me to meet one of his patients,
David.  Before the meeting he brought me up to date of David's problem, who
had lost his wife in a car accident.  It had been really traumatic and it
looked like David wanted to end it all.  The problem was that David looked
so much as Frank.  I wouldn't say they looked like twins, but could without
the slightest problem pass for brothers.  Automatically, the memory of
Frank came back full force to me.  Aidan didn't know what Frank looked like
and when I told him the resemblance, he apologized profusely and said he
would stop bringing me in for David's sake.  I told him to not do that.  I
wanted to help David, even if at the start it costed me quite a lot of
efforts to see hime sit in front of me.

	What do you guess?  Indeed, I felt very much attracted to David
even though I knew he was as straight as the proverbial arrow.  They had
had no children which meant David didn't have any motivation at all to get
out of his problem for the sake of them.  I had mourned Frank for a long
time.  David was still in a quite early stage and still had a long way to
go.  Once Aidan knew that I could easily be attracted to David, he
suggested to try and create a bond with him, not only during therapy, but
also outside.  I didn't know if Aidan was conscious about what he was
asking me.  Seeing David on a regular basis would remind me of what
happened to Frank and, of course, losing him.  Aidan saw it as a chock
therapy for me as well as for David.  I wasn't so sure about that.

	Nonetheless, in my attempt to help Aidan as well as David, I
accepted to ask him out for a drink after one the of the therapy sessions
that had been particularly difficult for David.  To say he was like a
zombie when the session ended, would be an understatement.  Despite his
almost absent state of mind, David accepted.  That I was gay was not a
secret to him.  David was not startled by it as he understood I was there
for his sake and not for mine.  He was convinced I had overcome my loss
completely.  Of course, he didn't know he was the spitting image of the
person I lost.

	That first time that we went out for a drink, had not been the most
enjoyable event.  David had still his moments where the tears were rolling
down his face and was obsessed with his wife's death.  All my attempts to
distract him from that obsession were vane.  Even when I tried to talk
about music or movies, David was always taking it as a way to tell me what
his wife had liked.  Aidan had told me to let him talk freely as much as
possible on this first outside meeting.  What neither Aidan nor I had
expected was that David opened up to me much quicker than what was
foreseen.  Already at the second meeting outside Aidan's practice, David
started to look me in the eyes when talking.  Aidan thought that was a huge
improvement as normally seen David was always watching the floor, even when
talking.

	For my part, I slowly started to enjoy these meetings.  When we
reached the point that we could have a conversation without any mention of
his late wife, I discovered David was actually a very nice guy.  We started
to go to restaurants instead of just having a drink, meaning David was
comfortable enough to be in my company for longer times.  It happened more
than once that when he mentioned his wife, he would grab my hand and
squeeze it lightly.  It seemed to help him getting over his problem.  I
never pulled my hand away when he did that.  Sometimes he even apologized
for doing so, but I assured him there was nothing to apologize about.

	Weeks and months went by.  Aidan told me that David's progress was
going really well and thanked me profusely as he said it was all thanks to
me.  The only thing I could say was that we were friends and that it was
normal to help out friends. Aidan asked me to tell him when we had a
meeting and that David would NOT mention his wife at all.  As you can
imagine, that really took some time.

	David had his ups and downs.  That was normal.  We had exchanged
phone numbers and when David had a really rough time, he would call me as I
had told him to do so.  One night around 11pm he called me and was crying
out loud.  I had this feeling he needed me more than ever and dressed again
as I was about to go to bed, and went over to his place.  As he opened the
door, I was surprised to see him, for the first time ever, almost naked,
wearing just his jeans.  For the first time the comparison with Frank faded
away.  Frank was smooth all over and David had a nice amount of hair on
chest and belly.  As soon as the door was closed, David threw himself into
my arms, sobbing like he had never done before.  I held him close to me,
not saying a word.  We were standing there in the hall, not moving.  It
took some time for David's sobbing to get less intense.  I was once again
surprised when he took my hand and lead me to the living room.  I was in
for an unbelievable scenery.  Everything was tidy and clean, but the walls
were covered with hundreds of pictures of David's late wife.  I had to
admit she was a beautiful woman, but without being the psychologist Aidan
was, I could see that this was not a healthy way to live, surrounded by all
the pictures from the past.

	I realized that all the therapy sessions were useless if after that
David came home and had his late wife overwhelm every step he made in this
house.  David didn't let my hand go while he showed me the pictures of his
wife and telling me the story that was behind every and each of them.  He
told me as well that each piece of furniture had a story and that most of
them had been purchased by his wife.  Everything he said was provoking
tears and sobs and more than once, he threw his arms around my neck and
asking me to hold him.  When we sat down on the sofa, he nostalgically
caressed the leather upholstery.  I understood what he was doing, but
couldn't approve.  I was confused as well with the fact that David was
searching for a physical contact with me.  Mind you, I loved it, but I was
also convinced it was for the wrong reasons.  Since Frank left and died, I
had had no physical contact whatsoever with anyone and I craved it.
Feeling David's hand on my arm or on my leg was arousing me despite the
circumstances.  Seeing his half naked body woke up desires that were
sleeping since Frank's departure.  I had my arm over David's shoulder.  His
hand was on my thigh.  His head was on my chest and after a while, I heard
him softly snoring.  My God!  What was I supposed to do?  I gathered all my
strength and lifted him up from the sofa and carried him to his bedroom,
laying him softly on his bed.  The bedroom walls were also covered with
pictures.  In the living room I found a piece of paper and a pen.  I wasn't
prepared to leave without giving him a note of explanation.

	The following morning, the first thing I did was call Aidan,
explaining what I had seen.  I felt like it was betrayal towards David, but
it was an extreme situation that asked for drastic measures.  There was no
way David would get out of his depression, surrounded by hundreds of
pictures of his late wife.  His place was a sanctuary dedicated to his wife
and would not allow him to go on with his life.  I could accept to find a
few pictures, but this was far too much for his mental health.

	I was just finished talking with Aidan when my phone rang.  It was
David.  He had read the note and thanked me, but also apologized for his
behavior the previous night.  I shrugged it off as if it was no big deal.
I had a sudden intuition and suggested for us two to go away for a
week-end.  I had done quite some city trips with Aidan and knew quite a few
nice places to go to.  David was not overly enthusiastic, but at least he
didn't say no.  I immediately went to the travel agency I used in the past
and selected a trip to Brussels, Belgium.  That city was magnificent with
beautiful architecture and so much cosy restaurants and cafés.  We
wouldn't need the car as everything was in walking distance.  I called
David to tell him to be ready on the Friday afternoon and not to plan
anything till the Monday morning.  He was a little hesitant, but finally
agreed.

	My idea was easy.  I wanted to see how he would behave when he was
NOT going back to that sanctuary that was his house.  I wanted to see if
being away from all those memories would allow him to live again.  I asked
Aidan what he thought about it and he admitted it was a brilliant idea and
that he wanted to hear all about it once we were back.

	The flight and shuttle to the hotel in the centre of the city were
eventless.  We were lucky as the weather was magnificent.  The hotel room I
booked was supposed to be with twin beds, but a mistake had occurred and
the only available room was with a king size bed.  We took it anyway as the
room was only for sleeping.  I planned to wander in the city as much as was
possible and discover that old town.  That first night we walked so much
that we lost our way.  We didn't have a clue as where we were and how to
get back to the hotel.  We didn't really worry.  We wanted to eat before
going back anyway.  We found a little place that was almost hidden in one
of the backstreets.  The food was delicious and we had chosen a nice bottle
of wine.  By the time we finished our meal, David was completely relaxed
and I could even see a smile on his face from time to time.  I had the
strong suspicion he finally was back to his normal self, to the time before
he lost his wife.  I wasn't surprised anymore when he took my hand over the
table or when we were walking in the street.  I started to see him as David
and not a surrogate Frank.

	To find our way to the hotel, we asked several people, but most of
them were tourists like we were.  Finally we found a police agent who could
explain us in detail what the best road was.  Once in our room, I was ready
to have a shower before slipping between the sheets.  Coming out of the
bathroom while drying off, I saw David sitting on the bed completely naked,
patiently waiting his turn to shower.  Being naked wasn't making him shy,
so I decided I wasn't going to be either and dropped my towel before
climbing into bed.  After his shower, David joined me and as I was laying
on my side, he pushed his back towards me so that I was spooning him.  I
couldn't help to put my arm around him and let it rest on his chest.
That's how we slept through the night and woke up in the same position.

	The two following days we walked a lot.  I was happy David loved to
walk as much as I did.  All that walking was far better than going to the
gym and spend time on a treadmill.  We saw so many beautiful things and ate
in the most wonderful little cafés and restaurants that are spread
over the town center.  I didn't mention anything to David, but he didn't
mention his late wife at all.  He was all smiles and he even laughed a few
times.  Even if I say so myself, he seemed genuinely happy and it confirmed
that the city trip had been a very good idea.  On the Sunday afternoon, we
were enjoying the sun rays on a terrace, trying out one of the numerous
Belgian beers, when suddenly David fell into a silent mode.  I asked him
what was going on.

	-I don't want to go back tomorrow...  I haven't been as happy in a
very long time Al and it is all thanks to you.  I know Aidan brought you in
to help me, but you did a lot more than just help me.  When I met you I
didn't see any purpose in my life anymore.  You slowly gave me back that
trust in life.  You have been there for me at whatever moment I needed
someone.  I feel a bit ashamed to say so, but Aidan did a good job and you
did an even better one.  You showed me true friendship.  For the first time
in all these months since my wife left this world, I enjoyed life and the
company you provided.  I will never be grateful enough to you.  I really am
not looking forward to go back to the life I know.  I am so ready to
explore the world, see and feel new things.  I have mourned more than
enough and I will miss my wife till the day I die, but meanwhile I have to
find joy in my life and once again, you are giving it to me.

	I was speechless.  For once since Frank died, I felt exactly what
David was saying to me.  We were on the perfect same wavelength.  I wanted
to say we were perfect soulmates.  If David was not as straight, I wouldn't
hesitate to kiss him and make love to and with him.  I could see myself
starting a love relationship with him, but that was not written in the
cards.

	-I am dreading to enter my house again.  I have the feeling that
all my memories with my wife prevent me to go on and live again.  It is not
that I want to forget her.  It is just that in that house she is so present
although not physically.  I could take away all the pictures, but I would
feel bad about it, almost as if I was unfaithful to her.  I could easily
buy all new furniture and make the place my own instead of ours.  I feel
bad about it.  Each time I drive home I have to pass the place where she
had the fatal accident.  It kills me inside...  You Al, you gave me a new
strength.  You made me see there is a life without my wife.  You made me
see there are a lot of people who could make my life complete again.

	-If you so dread to enter your house again David, you can stay at
my place.  I have spare bedrooms and an ocean of space.  If this week-end
is just a hint of what it would be to share time together, I think we would
actually help each other.  Solitude is no a good counselor.  Being it for
you or for me, living alone makes us see the black side of things instead
of the colorful side of life.  You are more than welcome to move in for as
long as you need it.  You can sell your house, furnished, and start a new
life wherever you want and not being without a roof over your head.  Take
your time to think it over but just don't forget you are welcome.

	I had no idea if Aidan would approve what I just did, neither for
David nor for me.  I didn't care.  I had let my heart speak, not my mind.
I had proven my point to have David smiling when he had not to go back to
his wife's sanctuary.  Our last evening meal in Brussels was pleasant but
not as joyful as the other meals we had.  David was apparently already
falling back in his routine.  I begged him not to spoil our time as it was
only the next day we had to fly home.  This last night in Brussels had to
be joyful, a night never to forget.

	It was almost midnight when we reached our room.  As usual David
urged me to take my shower first and so I did.  When I came naked out of
the bathroom, David looked so intensely at me that my manhood started to
swell.  I tried to be as nonchalant as possible and go on with my business
as if there was nothing happening.  David disappeared in the bathroom and
when he came out he was already dried, except for his hair.  He was shaking
his head from side to side as to get the last drops of water out of them.
He had a wicked smile on his face and when my eyes travelled down his body
I could clearly see he was not flaccid at all.  He came to bed and as I was
not in my usual position yet, he laid his head on my chest, his arms over
my belly and one of his legs over mine.  In that position I could feel his
manhood grow against my hips.  Unnecessary to tell you that mine reacted
almost immediately.

	What was going on?

	For the first time since I knew David, he was the one who was
taking charge of things.  He looked up at me and lifted his head enough to
have his lips graze mine.

	-You don't have to do that David, you are not gay.

	-I know I am not gay, but is it necessary to be gay to express my
feelings towards you?  Do you need me to make a picture to show you how I
feel?  We are both human beings and we are free to express ourselves in any
way we want.  Tonight I want us to make love, because that is what I feel
for you : unconditional and pure love.

	With that, his hand disappeared under the sheets and grabbed my
hard cock.  A loud sigh escaped my mouth that he covered with his.  His
tongue searched an invitation to get in my mouth and as I only parted my
lips a little, he took advantage of the small opening to have his tongue
dancing with mine before I even realized it.  My God!  He was one hell of a
kisser and as kissing is, at least for me, the most important part of the
lovemaking, I was in heaven.  I had no idea if David had any experience in
man to man sex.  What I knew was that he was doing everything he could to
increase my excitement to the highest level and from the start he was
succeeding pretty well.  We had only kissed and I was already feeling my
orgasm boiling in my balls.  When he licked out my ears and softly bit on
my earlobes, I could only moan out loud my appreciation.  He didn't give me
the opportunity to reciprocate as he travelled down my body, munching on my
tender flesh between ear and collarbone while caressing every square inch
of flesh he could reach, my nipples being closest.  I could feel his hairy
chest tickle my skin on his travel down.  He sucked on my nipples which
became very erect and really sensitive.  It was not that he was in a hurry,
but he clearly wanted to reach my genital region.  I was not going to
complain in any way.  For a split second he got up and kneeled next to my
body as to have better access to all the parts he wanted.

	He had not lost his grip on my cock at any time, massaging it
slowly but nonetheless exerting a certain pressure on my shaft.  I was
oozing precum like a faucet and he used it as lubrication to slowly
masturbate me.  I warned him that I was in such a state of excitement that
I would ejaculate at any moment.  He took it as a hint and lowered his
mouth, covering my cock and swallowing it to the root.  That was the green
light for my balls to expel everything that was in them.  My body convulsed
under his ministrations and my heartbeat went sky-high.  I am certainly not
a premature ejaculator, but David's hands and mouth drove me crazy like
never before.  He didn't miss a drop of my semen and continued sucking me
after I climaxed.  My cock-head was over-sensitive at that point and the
pleasure he gave me was almost hurting me.  He slowed down his sucking a
bit without letting my cock leave his mouth.  He pulled on my scrotum as if
he wanted to get out more juice.  My cock didn't deflate at any time.

	As he was concentrating all his attention to my cock, his manhood
drew nearer to my reach.  I only had to bend my head a little to be able to
kiss the tip of his magnificent cock.  As he felt I was trying to get to
his cock, he moved a little so I had full access and we were soon in a hot
69 position.  It was impossible for me to go slow.  I engulfed his cock to
the root, twirling my tongue around the head and pumping his shaft with all
the energy I had in me.  My one and only purpose was to give him as much
pleasure as he had given me.  Hearing his ragged breathing told me I was
doing a pretty good job.  His moans and groans got as loud as they could
with a cock in his mouth.  The muffled sound he made incited me to go on
and even further.  I bathed his cock in spit so that my hand could give it
a nice massage while licking his balls and letting them roll over my
tongue, but I had other plans.  I stretched as much as I could and munched
on his taint.  That was apparently something new to him as he stopped what
he was doing and breathed heavily.  I made a wild guess that he probably
had never had his ass eaten out and was decided to make him discover that
special feeling.  I spread his ass-cheeks wide open and dove in.  No
preliminaries were necessary to give him that new sensation in his nether
regions.

	David turned slowly on his back and raised his legs high in the
air, giving me total and free access to his ass.  I didn't need any further
invitation and went to French kiss his ass.  He wasn't a quiet lover and
his moans and groans became louder by the second.  I was thinking about the
neighbors, but really couldn't care less.  My only purpose, as said, was
David's pleasure.  As he was laying on his back, I crawled over him and
blocked his legs behind my arms.  That made me push my open ass to his
face.  I hoped he would get the hint and he didn't disappoint me, attacking
my ass with tongue and fingers.  Fingers in my ass drive me nuts!  Feeling
them inside of me is something that excited me beyond believe to the point
that sometimes I prefer two smaller fingers in my ass than one big cock.
David moved his fingers very skillfully and stimulated my prostate in such
a way that the flow of precum oozed out freely and abundantly.  In all our
conversations, we had never talked about sex as I was a hundred percent
convinced he was straight.  I had no idea if he wanted to penetrate me or
if he would prefer to be penetrated.  What ever his choice would be, I
could and would adapt.  Both our asses were bathed in spit and both our
cocks oozed precum.  There would be no need for extra lubrication.  David
flipped me over and this time I was on my back, with David kneeling between
my knees.  It was so endearing to hear him ask if I invited him into me.  I
had a bright smile on my face when I said he was more than welcome to
deposit his seed in me.  As he was well endowed I thought it would be safer
to use some lubricant and had a tube in my bag next to the bed and told him
so.  He grabbed the lube and applied a generous amount of it on my ass,
inserting it with his fingers till my love tunnel was as slippery as could
be.  He applied some more on his manhood and then put his cock-head right
on target, insisting I had to stop him if it hurt.

	It didn't hurt.  David was a very considerate lover and pushed his
hard organ in me with caution.  He pushed in and pulled out little by
little.  At one point I hooked my heels behind his back and when he entered
me again, I used all the strength I had in my legs to pull him completely
in.  He was more surprised than I was with this invasion.  I felt so full
and complete when I felt him in me to the root.  His trimmed pubes were
tickling my ass-cheeks and it was very pleasant to feel.  He stayed still
for a moment till he felt my ass relaxing and started the classical in and
out movement, rubbing my love tunnel with his shaft and my prostate with
his cock-head.  It had been so long since I had felt a mighty cock invading
my ass and he was doing it like a pro, starting with slow long thrusts and
then increasing his speed and strength with each thrust.  David had serious
endurance and went on and on entering and leaving me.  I had to beg him to
go faster and harder.  He didn't want to do it as he was afraid he would
climax too fast, but I told him the night was young, implicitly telling him
we could do it again and again.  It was the motivator he needed to increase
his pumping even more and I knew he was very close to cumming.  I craved to
have his juices in me.  With a final, hard and strong thrust, he stayed
deeply embedded in me while emptying a huge load in my bowels.  When he was
spent, he collapsed on me, desperately trying to regain some sort of
composure with a normal breathing and patiently waiting his heartbeat to
come back to a more normal rate.  That didn't prevent him form kissing me
passionately till his deflating cock left my ass.  It took him some time to
recover his ability to speak.

	-Were you really serious when you told me I can move in with you
for as long as I need it?

	I lifted his head as he had spoken in the crook of my neck and
looked him straight in the eyes.

	-I meant every word of it David.

	-But would you oblige me to sleep in a guest room?

	-You would have the choice to sleep in the guest room or in my bed.
That is up to you.

	He hummed in a satisfactory way.  He slipped off my body and laid
down next to me, once again with his head on my chest, his arm on my belly
and his leg over mine.  I was ready for round two but had to change my mind
when I heard him softly snoring.  Nonetheless I could see his face and he
had a real serenity and peace over him.  I had the feeling he was sleeping
a restful night for the first time in I don't know how long.  I reached my
free hand over and switched off the light.  I was happy to sleep in this
position with David in my arms.  I knew I was going to sleep like a baby as
well.

	In the morning I woke up in the same position.  I succeeded to slip
out of bed without waking David.  I called room-service for a continental
breakfast and went for a shower.  It was only half a surprise when I felt
David's hands rubbing my back and then press his whole body against mine
with a serious morning-wood pressing between my ass-cheeks.  Unfortunately,
we didn't have the luxury of time to let our physical appetite get the
better part of us as I already heard a knock at our door.  Room service was
really fast.  I put a bathrobe on to answer the door while David finished
his shower.  A very pleasant and polite guy wheeled the cart in and subtly
mentioned our shuttle to the airport would be at the door in an hour.  That
didn't leave us much time for breakfast and packing our bags.  Just before
we left the room, David took me in his arms and looked very intensely in my
eyes.

	-Are you really sure you want me to move in with you?  Because if
you do, as soon as we land, we go to my place, I take the necessary clothes
and items I need and we go to your place.

	-I think that is the perfect plan David.  We'll do it just as you
said.

	With the hotel shuttle we were too early at the airport but
checked-in anyway and went for the gate where we sat down.  David really
had problems believing I was serious with what I suggested and brought it
back up once again.

	-Listen David.  You should know me by now and know I don't make
false promises.  I told you, you can move in and stay as long as you want.
The only person that is taking a risk here, is me.  You know I am gay and I
could easily fall in love with you.  I know you are straight and the
chances are that you will meet a new woman and build a new life with her.
When that day comes, you will move out and I am aware of that.  You can't
deny who you are and even if we make love again and again, there will be a
day you will go back to what and who you are : a straight guy that loves
women.  I don't doubt a second about what you said last night, that you
love me unconditionally and I can assure you that love is mutual and
reciprocal, but nonetheless I know the risk I take.  The day you do it, I
will NOT hold it against you, I promise.  You have always been honest to me
and you didn't promise me anything at all.  It's more, I don't expect you
to promise anything.  Destiny has brought us together in the most unusual
way and in the worst of circumstances.  We helped each other, a lot.  We
have to be grateful for what we have and the opportunities that are offered
to us.  We have no idea what tomorrow will bring in our lives and I am
philosophical enough to live day by day.  I thank the Universe for bringing
you in my life because above everything I consider you the best friend I
could hope for.  I want you to move in with me because I know we still have
a lot of things to go through and together we will be strong enough to face
them.  Once the tasks we have for and by each other will be over, it will
be time to go each our own way, but till then I want you as close to me as
possible.

	There, in that airport terminal, David stood up and straddled my
lap, taking my face in his hands and kissed me with an undeniable passion.
We didn't care that anybody and everybody could see us.  We couldn't care
less what people thought about us.  If they had two ounces of intelligence,
they would only see love regardless of who was kissing who.

	At the appointed time the embarking began.  There were six seats
per row with a passage in between of each set of three seats.  A man
approached our row, checked his seat number with his boarding pass and
immediately called the stewardess and said quite loud so that everybody
could hear that he was not going to sit next to two FAGS.  The stewardess
very politely asked him to sit down while she would check any availability.
The man was obviously in a very bad mood but obliged anyway.  It was not
the stewardess who came back, but the pilot himself.  Very politely he said
to the man that he could understand it was unacceptable to sit next to two
fags.  Then turning to us, he asked us to follow him as he had two seats
for us in first class.  The ones around us who had followed the
conversation started to applaud the pilot and we moved, indeed, to first
class.  I made a mental note to write to the airline company to
congratulate them about their personnel.

	After landing and collecting my car, I drove to David's place.  We
gathered his personal stuff such as clothes, his computer and just one
picture of his late wife.  He had thought it over carefully and wanted to
sell his house.  He would keep the memories in his mind and heart, but
nothing else.  He said he would come back one day to take away all the
pictures as it was necessary to sell the house.

	We settled in a comfortable life, living together and yes, sleeping
in the same bed.  Lovemaking was awesome with David and if he pretended he
was not gay at all, he surely knew how to please me and be quite spirited
in bed.  He was actually insatiable and wanted to interact sexually at all
hours.  We shared the household chores and he even wanted to pay rent, but
I refused as the house was mine and paid for.  We met Aidan, together and I
let David tell him our getaway to Brussels so he could tell whatever he was
comfortable with.  I was pleasantly surprised to hear him give the full
story, not letting out the smallest details, not even the sexy ones.  Aidan
couldn't do anything else than to congratulate him for the sudden turn of
things and his quick recovery, applauding the fact he was closing the
chapter with his late wide in such a drastic way.

	Our living together went on for several months and I didn't see
David actively looking for a new love with any woman.  He told me he didn't
need it as he felt very comfortable with me and saw no reason at all to
change the situation.  He was a pleasant "roommate" and the perfect
considerate lover.  If you asked me, I didn't want him to find a woman and
rebuild a life that was similar to the one he had with his wife.  I dreaded
the moment he would tell me he met someone as I was sure that moment would
come sooner or later.  After all, David was not gay, except with me.

	We repeated the city trips and saw quite a lot of nice places as we
both loved the architecture of old buildings and most of all the history
that was behind them.  Those week-ends were a breath of fresh air every
time we got away.  Sometimes Aidan joined us and we had really good times.
That was till the dreaded moment arrived.  David met a new colleague at
work.  Veronica was a beautiful woman and accepted David's past without any
restrictions.  She understood what had happened in his life and why he was
living with me.  David didn't rush anything.  He was always asking the same
question : was the life he could have with Veronica better than what he had
with me?

	When I noticed he was asking less lovemaking of me, I new he had
started having sex with her.  He was totally honest with me about it.  His
problem was that he didn't want to cheat on any of us and wasn't
comfortable with having sex with two different people at the same time.  He
felt he had to make a choice.  I reminded him of the conversation we had at
the airport when we came back from Brussels many months ago.  He was
feeling bad that I was right from the very start.  I tried to show him as
much understanding as possible, although my heart was bleeding inside.  I
hid it with all my energy and before David even announced he was moving in
with Veronica, I resumed my professional visits with Aidan.  I expected him
to tell me : "I told you".  He didn't.  He was first of all a professional
and my best friend on top of it.

	I had met Veronica on more than one occasion and I had to admit
they were a perfect match.  I had never seen so much love in her eyes and
it calmed me down, knowing David was going to have a healthy relationship
with her and be happy.  When David told me he had asked Veronica to marry
him, and that she had accepted, I knew that my solitude was going to very
hard.  I couldn't blame him, on the contrary.  I had seen it coming almost
before we started our story.  The only solace was that I had made a friend
for life.


To be continued...

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